I want chilies. I want Applebees. Isn’t that the same thing? How dare you? This is a hot dog as a sandwich. Ketchup is a smoothie. Yeah, I put ice in my cereal. So what? That makes no sense. A hot dog is a sandwich. A hot dog is a sandwich. What? Welcome to our podcast, A Hot Dog is a Sandwich. The show we break down the world’s biggest food debates. I’m your host, Josh Shar. And I’m your host, Nicole. And I And Nicole, that was a very controversial and brave thing that you said. There’s no difference. There has Okay, what we’re about to find out is if there is a difference. There’s no difference between the two restaurants. Let’s break down why we have all of this stuff in front of us, right? So, we did a podcast about a month back. We did a podcast some time back. Who knows how time works anymore. I don’t. About how apparently I how any time works. About how Gen Z saved Chili. You were sick for this one. We had Trevor come in and sub in as the official Gen Z representative that we have here. And Chili’s has been on this like massive cultural wave and renaissance lately. It really has been. It’s so impressive. Literally like up 30% over the last year, up 50% over the last 3 years. Which leads the question, porcho Applebees. I I No one talks about Applebees. It’s all chili all the time. And maybe we need to change that. Porceno manzanabes. No. How do you say bee in Spanish? How do you say like a bumblebee? Megita por favore translation on Google. said bumblebee in Spanish. But because in my mind, apple bees and chilies are a little bit the same thing. But this pastor ao abbeoro abberoro aboro abberoro mansana mansana de a aboro I also kind of view Applebees and chilies as the same thing. They aren’t they both like Applebees does not repax per se. Chili does, but they but they do obviously because they have cas. That’s also just kind of like American food at this point. At this point, quesadilla is a quesadilla. You know what I mean? Um, but there’s a reason that when Valentine’s Day 2025 rolled around, Julie and I never thought about going to Applebee’s. We thought about going to Chili’s. So, this I think will answer the question of is the Chili’s Renaissance merely because of marketing? Is it because of Jenz’s weird postironic kind of uh fake nostalgia for the early 2000s and Chili’s just happened to like be the one that they chose? or is there an actual difference because Chili’s did some menu revamping and a lot of quality control and I want to see if it pays off. You don’t know if Applebee’s did any of that? Not to my knowledge or at least it wasn’t as heavily publicized cuz they’ve been running their own specials, right? The two for 25 at Applebee’s. Everyone knows I saw an ad for that last night and it was what a great ad. 10 out of 10 ad on that. Yeah. What are you seeing from the visual differences cuz tell us about the food that we have. So, I would say I’ll say this. Out of all of the portions, I will say that the Applebee’s portions that are on Josh’s size side are much smaller than the Chili’s portion sizes. What we have in front of us is appetizers, a rack of ribs, a burger and fries, and a dessert. Before the food gets completely cold, we should It’s cold. It’s ice cold. I’m sorry. I heated it up. I Let me tell you what happened. I was heating it up. I had a hot hot flash. had to take my shirt off. Literally, our former director, Ben, had to help me microwave stuff cuz I was literally suffering. Oh, I’m sorry. It’s fine. I’ve been there. I don’t know where you Where are you ever? I don’t know. Where are you now that I need you? I don’t know the song. Let’s dig into the appetizers, though. Let’s jump in. We have Chili’s Triple Dipper over there. Yes. Tell us about what we got in the Triple Dip. The Triple Dipper. It has boneless buffalo wings. Are you okay? I dipped my arm into the chocolate icing. I triple dipped my whole forearm into the fudge icing. Let me Let me shellac it off. Do you want me to eat it? Did it make it worse? No. I know. I don’t want you to do that. Nicole is scraping chocolate frosting off of my forearm with the blade of a dull knife. Tell them about the appetizers while I wipe myself down. Okay. So, from both places. So, so from Chili’s we have boneless buffalo wings, mozzarella sticks. They’re Southwest egg rolls. And then on the Applebee side, we have mozzarella sticks, boneless buffalo wings, some celery, and a quesadilla. If you look at the mozzarella sticks from chilies, these are not sticks. These are gigantic logs. These are planks. And when they’re actually hot and fresh at the store, but can I tell you something? I think mozzarella sticks are so overrated. I love the planks. The planks do a good job. I agree. And the planks give you such a massive cheese pull and such a satisfying dunk. These are one of those things that is like a very a very it’s become a hallmark for the Chili’s car eating social media posting experience. Mhm. I will say the thing about mozzarella sticks that irks me is that the cheese doesn’t taste like anything. It’s a very very bland cheese. Good stretch, zero flavor. Now what I want us to do is one day come up with a cheese that’s flavorful that has the same amount of stretch as mozzarella. Oh, that’s interesting. What if you marinated a feel like we talked about doing this one day and we never did like heavily marinating a m I think we made a show about it. Did we? Oh no. I don’t like it. Mozzarella stick for mozzarella stick. Chili’s it even looks better. It looks handbredded. I I I don’t know if it is. I’m not sure if this is being done in the store in a factory. Yeah, the chili’s one like looks like something homemade. You go to your Italian American friend’s house, right? His mama. They’re not doing it. Mama Jeppa domino, right? Juice Jeppa Domino. That is such a fake name. That’s one of my favorite Trevor bits where he talks about talks about Mama Domino. Mhm. How she makes a good pizza. Her first name is Jeppa. I’ve named her Jeppa. Um the mozzarella in the Chili’s one feels like more of a proper like whole milk or moisture moss. Whereas the one inside Applebees tastes like freaking string cheese. Tastes like Costco. Tastes like tastes like tastes like string cheese to me. This seems like string cheese logs they breaded. Really disappointing. That’s interesting. Really disappointing. Okay, move on to the boneless wings. Okay, these are boneless buffalo wings, right? Sorry, there’s no ranch. That’s kind of dipping it in marinara. There is ranch. I just don’t know where it is. That’s fine. What are you What are you tasting in the chili boneless wing? Nothing. I mean, boneless buffalo wings I could just eat all day. To me, it’s like the perfect seasoned food really. That is so underwhelming for me. In what way? The chilies. It It has no sauce. It has absolutely baked into the actual like outside crust. I like that. No, I don’t like that. I need a little bit of I need a little bit of I I’m down with the sogg. I have no problem with the sogg. It’s the flavor of said sogg. There is no flavor in said sogg. The Applebee’s ones look more heavily seasoned. They look so much better. And they have a little bit They have more of a buffalo taste. Much more of a buffalo taste. Which one of these tastes more like it just came out of a freezer bag? Applebees. It does, right? But the seasoning is better on it. The seasoning is better, but it kind of tastes more The chicken is better processed. The chicken is better at chilies. The seasoning is better at applebe. Which one of these boneless buffalo wings would you rather eat? I would rather eat Applebee’s because it tastes better. I would rather eat chilies. I disagree. It feels like there’s better quality control. It feels like a person made it and you care about that. We don’t a little bit a little bit. When you go to a restaurant, right? Like if you are just getting Applebees and chilies work on such massive scales, right? I remember maybe the worst restaurant meal of my life was at the College Station Applebees. Do you know College Station? Never heard of College Station. It’s where Texas A&M University is. There is, forgive me for all the College Station nights out there. Nothing else in the area other than College Station Texas and Texas&M University. Wait, it’s a city. College Station USA. City is called College Station Texas. That’s right. Texas A&M as the agricultural and military university. Okay. And I went to an Applebee’s there and I ordered I was trying to get some like protein. It was when I was on the track and field team and I ordered a steak and it was just an unidentifiable cut that did not exist anywhere. Glue galore. Well, I cannot explain to you. So, like when you’re working at those scales, it’s so hard to get this consistency without it just being like a factory shipping frozen stuff to a store. So, you’re kind of like working in this weird dynamic where by definition, if you want consistency, it has to be pre-made. But also, people don’t just want to show up to a restaurant and feel like they’re being given something that was heated up out of a bag. Apparently, the chains wings are voted America’s favorite boneless swing in a blind taste test in early 202. No, Applebees. Applebees. I’m telling you, the Applebee’s flavor knocks it out of the park. You just don’t like the texture of it. Maybe I got a kind of gristly one. Maybe you got a gristly one. You can see how much more like white meat there is, which normally that’s not that important to It’s not important to me in buff in any sort of boneless buffalo wing. But for some reason, you think it’s it’s important. I don’t know. Let’s move on to their um what would you call this? This is an egg roll. Well, it’s not an egg roll. So, chili southwest egg roll. It’s in a tortilla, right? Is it? What a fun food. This is a tortilla. This is called a chim chunga. Oh, what a fun food. And then a southwestern chimmy chonga is redundant. This is just a little chimmy chunga. It’s filled with what? Spinach, cheese, uh, uh, corn, black beans, all the delicious things. This is a hallmark. This is OG chilies. This is like what made chilies. Absolutely delicious. It reeks so heavily of cumin. I love it. So cumin. Whatever R&D chef made this. Brava. Delicious. You know what it is? It’s the roasted red pepper, corn, and black bean combo. That was like every single 1990s southwest something. Taco Bell even had a chalupa that had like black beans and corn in it. Southwest chalupa. Santa Fe Chalupa. That’s so funny. Back in the day. RIP. This is delicious. What What What do we have here from the Applebees? It’s a quesadilla stuffed with tomato, onion, cilantro, and chicken. Do you remember what they call this? Which is like southwestern delight quesadilla. I’m going to look it up right now. It doesn’t hold a candle. It can’t. Completely different. Entirely different. Absolutely. Warm tortilla with chipotle lime chicken, blend of melted cheddar cheeses, and I see tomato, onion, and cilantro in here. So, the triple dipper combo from Chili’s. Also, do you know there’s no combo customizable? It’s customizable. It’s customizable, too, which is fun. That gives people like a feeling of control. Mhm. You know, it’s it’s it’s it was responsible for something like 16% of their entire store sales, which is crazy considering they have 100 items on that freaking menu. Um, and there’s a lot of liquor sales. Mhm. And I understand why. like it is really well done. The mozzarella sticks are fantastic. I think the Buffalo the boneless buffalo wings are great. The sauce are good. The Southwest egg rolls an icon. Nothing to me from Applebees. The the boneless wings are good. I’ll give you that. Yeah. Like they’re tasty. But you go like tortilla southwest product for tortilla southwest product. Ms. For ms chilies to me like smokes it. The triple dipper is the truth. There’s so much care and detail that went into this, and you can taste it, which you don’t always expect from a joint like Applebee’s or Chili’s, but Chili’s knocks out of the park. The triple dipper absolutely beats out the Applebee’s appetizer combo. What a treat. Appetizer round. Chili’s wins and away. I It’s It’s always really heartening to me. Okay, put that over there. When someone when a big fast food chain like tries to make sweeping food changes and it pays off. Sure. Yeah, it’s always impressive. Talk a lot about the Domino’s 2008 menu revamp. Sure. Should we eat some burgers? My body is really So, the burgers were another part of Chili’s of Chili’s revamp, right? Where they were like, we want to compete with fast food because fast food’s so expensive. So, Chili’s really attacked the fast food industry saying like, “Hey, come into Chili’s for a sitown meal. We’ll treat you like a human.” And our burgers cost $10 and a fast food burger cost $8 now, right? You know what I mean? The Chili’s burger is called the oldtimer burger and the Applebee’s burger is called the neighborhood burger. Isn’t that so sweet? I’m g cut this Applebee’s burger out. Go ahead. It looks like the Applebee’s burger is a double patty. Double smash burger at Applebee’s. Look at that. Who would have fun? Chili’s also has a smash burger. We didn’t get it right. No, we got I went off of names. I went off of names because I’m sorry, oldtimer burger and the neighborhood burger. That’s the same burger. I agree with that. I agree with that. Yeah. It also kind of looks a little smashy. Chili’s burger looks nice, right? The Chili’s burger is wide. Bring back wide ass bar burgers. It is a wide set burger. Okay. What are you going to eat first? I’m going Applebee’s. Okay. So, they tried to smash. They got the heavy lace. Uh-huh. On the outside, but the patties aren’t smashed thin enough. So, to me, you kind of get a little bit the worst of both worlds where you’re smashing all the juice out of a thick patty, and it’s only the outsides that are crispy. Not only that, look at this like weird crust on the bottom of just like old grill. It’s giving grayge. It’s giving grayge. I’m not gray. It’s gray and beige. Still tastes pretty decent. I like the pickle pop. I like the pickle that they use. Mhm. Meat tastes fine. There are these funny things in food. Mhm. Where like it’s in the margins, right? It’s in It’s the devil’s in the details for certain things. Like a smash burger. The reason you love a smash burger isn’t just because you’re like smashing it and getting the lacy crust, whatever, but it’s because you’re then smashing it thin because a smash burger by definition is going to lose moisture. So that like crispiness needs to like overcome it. More press. There’s not enough press. Too much rest or it’s in between. It’s in a It’s in a bad middle, right? It’s in shape. Yeah. Hey, Applebees, smash them down a little bit harder. What about the fries? Cuz Chili’s put a lot of time into revamping their fries. There’s a whole story about the salt. Those taste pretty good. Applebee’s fries taste delicious. Not a bad fry. Not a bad fry. They do. Chili’s fries. They look eerily similar. I don’t like that. You don’t like chili fries? Chili’s fries are bigger. And I think they cut down on their amount. Bigger doesn’t always mean better for French fries. No, it doesn’t. This is what I’d want, though. This tastes like a freshly fried fry. It’s actually less salty, which is funny because they they changed up the way they salt their fries to get more salt on them. You know what I’m learning about me and you? I like the flavors and you like the pure expression of the food. Are you sure about that? You just Yeah, because this the seasoning on the Applebee’s fry is much better than the seasoning on the chili fry. But the cook on the chili fry is better than the Applebee’s cook. I think to me, you know what I’m actually looking for? What? I’m looking for a difference between this and fast food. Why? Because I think the fast casual restaurant, like the thing that it occupied for me was to be that fancy sitdown restaurant where you’re treated like a human, right? Where you can walk in for if you only have a budget of 20 bucks a person. You can walk in for like a graduation, right? For a pre-p prom dinner, for a birthday when times are tight, and you can have somebody come up to you and smile at you and say like, “Hey, would you like to try our special?” and go, “Oh my god, it’s 2 for 25. Yay.” That’s a different relationship than going into like a Carl’s Jr. being like, “Let me eat my burger alone in this corner or in my car.” Sure. And so for like a fry, like I I want like a big thick fry. I don’t want it to taste like fast food. I don’t know. I’m I’m so I’m so like torn because I understand where you’re coming from, but I don’t I don’t love the thickness. I don’t need my fries thick. I don’t need them to be like this thick potatoey center. Yeah. Yeah. I kind of appreciate the light crisp of a smaller fry. Different strokes for different folks on that one. The burger is interesting because the sm the double smash is very much meant to be a fast food burger, right? This is like a proper like diner bar burger at Chili’s. I just got a huge bite of tomato. Look how juicy that ruined my whole day. What do you mean? Oh my god. It was all tomato. No seasoning, no flavor. The cook on the burger is really nice with chilies. The cook is good, but there’s no seasoning on it. Zero zilch nada. The human error, dude. That’s the human error. Like, if you’re cooking your food fast and you like that. No, no, no, no, no. I I’m saying this is bad. This is bad. The burger is not good. I think if this burger patty was seasoned well, I think it’d be solid. Yeah. But yeah, there’s not an ounce of seasoning on that meat. That’s really disappointing. It makes the whole thing fall flat. Would you take that Apple Bees burger over the Chili’s burger? Yes. Any day. That ch That Chili’s burger was disappointing. Absolutely disappointing. I think it’s better constructed. I think it’s a better constructed burger. No way. Are you going to give the point to Chili’s for an unseasoned burger patty right now? We give it to We give it to Applebee’s. It belongs the point to Applebees. It belongs to Applebees. No, be real. The salt factor and the taste factor is I would rather eat the Chili’s burger than the Applebee’s burger. Stop it. I don’t How are you How are you like this, dude? Try this burger. Okay, it’s not a good burger. They’re neither of them are good burgers. Neither of them are good. But at least just tastes like meat. I just taste like burger. It’s a fair point. That just tastes like cow. What do you mean? What do you mean this tastes like burger? That tastes like cow. Burger and Okay. Burger is cow. No way. Applebee’s takes this. I accept. I accept that Applebee’s taste it. Dude, there’s an aftertaste in that burger. You bite this and you’re like, I just ate a big bowl of gray. I don’t know why gray is on my mind so much. Baby back. My baby back. Baby back. Baby, I want my baby back. Baby, I want my baby back. Chilies, baby back ribs, a barbecue sauce. There it is. This is what they’re known for. I don’t think I’ve eaten baby back ribs at Chili’s. I don’t think I’ve ever had ribs like this. Oh my god. Oh my god. What are you doing? I’m trying to cut the ribs, but they’re tough. Oh no. Oh my. Here. Grab a double boner ribs. Jesus. A double boner for Nicole. Her favorite. Oh my god, it’s so dry. Because of how iconic the Chili’s baby back ribs song is. I don’t know anyone that like goes to Chili for ribs, right? That moment in time has passed. When do you ever go to a restaurant for ribs? I only go for barbecue. If I’m at a barbecue joint, I’ll go. There’s a couple like old school spots near me that are like the sitown steakhouse style that are like known for their quote oven baked spare ribs. Are those pork or beef? Pork. M glazian barbecue sauce. And I would never order them. I think it’s like of a different era. Yeah, I agree. The type of person who’s like, “Oh, we’re going out to this nice steakhouse for their oven baked spare ribs.” Like, no one does that. Like, what is this, a Korean War, like 1953? You know, I’m looking forward to the nuclear age. This is bizarre. Um, no. If you want ribs, you go to a barbecue spot. Exactly. Are these um love the flavor? Flavor’s good. That is good. That sauce is dimensional. Multi-dimensional. Applebees has a good sauce. Applebee’s knows what it’s doing. How much better do the chili ribs look than the Applebee’s ribs? 20 times better. So much better. So much better. They’re not desiccated. Yeah. Will they rip? Oh, hi. That’s how ribs should rip. Apple I mean chilies. Another Okay. This is where Come on. This is where the cook absolutely trumps any sort of flavor. Yeah, I do agree. The apple bees are better seasoned. The apple bees, dude, their seasoning game is on lock. Their cook time is just all wrong. It’s so wrong that the the Apple be ribs are so tough. So, they’re but they’re dry and tough, which means they’re both cooked for too short and too long. Too long. Again, just like missing that sweet spot where food is great. Wow. The chilies chilis baby back ribs and barbecue sauce. Maybe we should be eating Chili’s ribs. That’s I think we should go I think we should go to Chili’s, get their oven baked spare ribs, you know, drinking oldfashioned. Are we going into war anytime soon? Uh-oh. Is America going into war? Write in the comments if America’s going to war soon. If it is, by stocking ovenbaked spare ribs, cuz that’s the time they boom, baby. Uh, easy win for chilies, right? Wow. Chilies. These ribs were crazy. I I don’t love ribs that like fall off the bone. And these don’t. This is something that I’ve learned about you. You like your ribs to have some integrity. Yeah. You got to be able to pick up a rib and actually like eat it like a corn cob. Right. I don’t It’s It’s too easy to make rib meat fall off the bone. You’re right. Anyone can do it, right? It’s an art form to be able to get it the way it’s tender enough to rip off of the bone with a little bit of action from your teeth. This is the the ribs at chilies are damn near like my ideal cook on it. Applebees too tough. It’s like you’re uh just like ripping at it, trying to rip the flesh off the bone. Chilies, good job. Great job, Chili’s. Chili’s is two for one right now. Excuse me. Chili’s has two points. Applebee’s has one point. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Now we just got dessert left. Time for desserts. Time for desserts. I’m still eating my ribs. I didn’t The ribs are kind of like dessert. I was in the middle of eating my lunch and then I remembered that we were doing this. Oh yeah. And I immediately just threw it in the fridge. Said, “Nope, that’s lit. That’s litter. That’s dinner liner. I think all the trans fats in the ribs are going to my head. Are you sure it’s not wiping your body with Lysol wipes? Oh, this podcast brought to you podcast brought to you by Lysol surface wipes that I’ve been using on the surface of my body. Well, I’m using Great Value ones because I like to ball on a budget. Those ones were bought after Mythical Company budget cuts. Like no more name brand surface wipes for the surface of Josh’s hands. I don’t think wiping our hands with Lysol wipes is good for us. Ah, can’t be. But we keep doing it. What are you going to do? Nothing. Why these look so different? These are the same dessert. Yeah, they’re molten chocolate cake. Both companies decided that I did not get it. Alam mode. Sorry, Josh. No, I don’t. I think Alamode desserts are kind of really overrated. Okay, that’s ugly of you. That’s my hot take. That’s your hot take. That’s my hot take. Okay. All mode is almost never as good as you want it to be. Let’s see if this Applebee’s molten chocolate cake is This looks like it was um You ever get the the desserts at Carl’s Jr.? Never. I have a family that I’m just kidding. Let me rephrase that. I’ve eaten every single dessert at Carl’s Jr. So, um they’ve one I think they have the best handspun shakes in the game. Carl Jr. did a really good job on revamping that. Uh they’ve done some fun desserts like the Pop-Tart ice cream sandwich is good, but the old school Carl Jr. desserts are just like piece of chocolate cake and it’s just like in a plastic unmarked bag and they just like throw it at you. They have like a strawberry cheesecake and it looks like this. Maybe it’s made in the same facility. It might be. But this this looks like this was made in a factory that they put in a microwave and put some sauces on, right? Yeah. Why doesn’t the Chili’s cake look the same? Am I being too generous to Chili’s right now? I don’t know what’s wrong with you right now. I burp from the inside. That was a weird feeling. I feel like me and you are on drugs. I We’re not on drugs. We’re on chilies, baby. I don’t do pot. I do triple dipper combos. You’re out here freebasing? Well, I’m out here free baking up my chili, molten chocolate cake, having a great time with my friends. That’s what I’m doing. When’s your birthday? June. No. April. Damn, man. Hey, April 25th. I have no idea when your birthday is. It’s in May. Your birthday’s in May. Yeah, you’re 19th. No, you’re a Gemini. Yeah, but you’re a Taurus. And but you don’t care about that. Um, we should have your next birthday at Chili’s. No, I won’t go cheese. You want to shut down Chili’s for your birthday? That would actually be really cool. How much does it cost to shut down in Chilies? I’m sure you can find it. Why don’t you just tell corporate? Corporate who? Corporate Chilies. What do you mean I just tell corporate chilies? Who do you think I know? info@chilies.com would like to shut down whole restaurant near Enino Commons for birthday, please. Yeah, you Yeah, the one near the Michaels. Close mouths. Don’t get fed. What do you think of the cake? Yum, right? Yum. Why would I complain about that? It’s the only thing it’s missing. Vanilla ice cream. Yeah, it’s a fair point. Um, chilies. This one looks This looks like a British pudding. It does look like a British pudding. Is this a caramel sauce or is this a chocolate sauce? It is both. It’s a caramel chocolate sauce. It is separate both. What? It is a caramel sauce and a chocolate sauce. Interesting. This cake looks It looks more homemade. Why? Oh, yeah. Not even a question. No. So much better. Oh, it’s so much better. It looks better. It tastes better. It tastes better. There’s man, there’s something that happens to restaurants where like I’m sure every single person at Applebees when they were first starting out had the intention of like we’re making good food for people, right? At some point it’s like it’s what happened to Chipotle, you know, where all one neuroirus and lististeria and ecoli outbreak and suddenly it’s over. Our whole our whole ethos was we cook everything fresh in store. Suddenly you got to start pre-cooking your steaks at a commissary facility in Long Island. Really disappointing. and you got to start just sending them out pre-cooked because you’re like, “We can’t take that risk.” At some point, you kind of like look back at all the foods you made and went, “God, this is all just factory food.” But I think if you’re like Chili’s, you can try and like reverse that. I’m sure all of this I’m sure between Chili and Applebees, they’re probably getting equal amounts of food that are just shipped in frozen in bags or from other third party bakeries, whatever. But Chili’s made you feel like the magic is still there. Absolutely. And it’s that trickery and chicainery that I’m really looking for in a in a chain restaurant. I mean, I would go back for the ribs and a triple dipper. Mhm. And this cake. I would go back for those things. I I really would, which is crazy because remember how everyone was like, “Oh, Mill, what is Did they say Gen Z was killing uh chain restaurants?” No, Millennials, we killed all the chains. They said we killed the chains. But now, as a millennial, I think it’s our job to bring them back. I think it’s only fair. I won’t go to Applebee’s because they lost abysmally. Chili’s, you deserve all the hype. You really do. You know what I was thinking about the other day? Um that one time in 2015 when there were random clowns running around uh scaring people. Oh, I was. Yeah, I know you were. I was. But I’m not I’m not afraid of clowns. I’m not afraid of clowns either. I’m afraid of the people dressing up as clowns terrorizing people at night. Same. If anything, I’m I’m disproportionately attracted to clowns. Yeah. You think clowns are hot? Some hot clowns are hot. Crusty. Not Crusty. No. I like him because he’s a good businessman. But Andy’s Jewish. The Jewish. I was going to say I was going to say No, I was going to say like our parents’ generation lamented the fact that mom and pop stores on main street on main streets were losing out to the big chains. I thought about this when the Joann’s Fabrics near me closed and I was like, “Oh, not Jo-Ann’s. That was my childhood.” then realized how weird it was that I was lamenting like a large chain that was responsible for closing out along a lot of local fabric stores, right, that our parents hated. And then now our generation is like not Jo-Ann’s, my sacred safe space, losing out to online giants like Amazon or whomever, you know, and so it’s kind of weird to like feel this affinity for these gigantic chain restaurants who are doing literally $4.5 billion dollars in sales as like underdogs. But I would rather root for them than a what? A ghost kitchen. No, you know what I mean? I think I think as we are getting further and further away from God. I was going to say hospitality. Yeah. And I I guess it’s is it D to C? Is that direct to consumer? Like it’s becoming more like that or is it becoming what I’m trying to say is the humanness of sitting down at eating at a restaurant is an important thing that I don’t want to lose. and eating foods from places like Chili’s, Applebee’s, Cheesecake Factory, CPK. I don’t want to I don’t want it to miss. I don’t want it to leave. I can’t have it leave, you know? It breaks my heart to think about the fact that someone’s saying, “Hey, can I take your order today? Oh, you’re back again.” Like, I really Mhm. I feel like I’m really going to miss that in like 15 years whenever I’m getting my food to go from Mr. Beast’s Emporium Sigorium. You know what I mean? It’s really upsetting. But this food made me realize that we can find those moments of like true human interaction and we can enjoy it. Mr. Beast Gorium’s Wonderburger porium. That’s what it’s called. Yeah, that’s what it’s called. Yeah. I found God in this chili tonight. Nicole. Okay, Pam. [Music] All right, Nicole. Heard what you and I have to say. Now it’s time to find out whether the wacky ring near the earth. Time for the segment we call opinions are like casserole. [Music] That’s right, Nicole. That’s right. I spit. I spit everywhere. I don’t feel so good. I feel bad. What the people missed was outside. So, we cleaned up the table. We had a lot of chilies and apple bees here. And then what I went ahead and did is outside we have a cart with all the stuff. There’s a little tub of There’s a little tub of spinach artich choke dip that we didn’t use. I decided to not put in. No, that was a good move. And so you we’ll eat it. We give it up. But what I did is I took a corner of the burger, the unseasoned one, and I said, “Well, maybe maybe we can season it with spinach artich choke dip.” And so what I went ahead and did is I dipped that whole burger into the tub of spinach artich choke dip. And then I bit into it and then I went and I sucked the spinach artich choke dip through the Listen, I’m down with a spinach artich choke dip burger. Just season your damn meat. Okay, ready for the first opinion? Let’s do it. Hey, Josh Nicole. My name’s Rocco. Calling from Madison, Wisconsin. I have a question for Nicole. What’s a dish that you are looking forward to teaching your child how to cook? For me, I cannot wait to show my 2-year-old eventually how to make homemade bread and homemade pasta. So cute. But yeah, what’s uh what’s something that you’re looking forward to teaching uh teaching your your child how to uh how to make at whatever age you might be? Love you guys and uh love the show. Hope you guys have a great day. Bye-bye. Wow, great question. I’ve never thought about this at all. I’m going to go ahead and say lemonade stand. Is that Is that bad? What? Lemonade stand. You ever did a lemonade stand as a kid? You’re excited to teach your child how to make the dish Lemonade Stand. I thought I literally I thought Lemonade Stand was like a regional dessert that I wasn’t familiar with. You were so mean right now. I’m not being mean. No, it I want to teach cuz I grew up in an apartment and my mom wasn’t always like, “Hey, go like she wasn’t like, “Hey, hang out at the corner.” Like, you know what I mean? So, I would like my kid to have a lemonade stand outside of their house and to understand like dealing with people and talking with people and making a good cup of lemonade. Is that stupid? That’s literally my instinct. A second answer. Spicy dude crispy rice. You’re a three-year-old child. Here’s how you put sticky rice into a deep fryer. Exactly. I love that. Chop it up faster. Faster. No. Um, I thought they were going to ask, “What am I looking forward to eating once I’m done being pregnant?” Spicy tuna crispy rice. And let me tell you what I’m going to do. Let me tell you what I’m going to do. I’m going to have a margarita in one hand. I’m going to have a deli sandwich in the other hand. And with my left foot, I’m going to hold a cigarette. And then with my right foot, I’m going to hold another cigarette. bowl. Just a bowl of spicy tuna, spicy salmon, and spicy yellowtail on a bed of rice with some avocado and some cucumbers. Literally, you’re literally those are my four vices, and I’m just going to be passing through each one every 15 minutes. I need I need the camera to come here because I want to tell you a little bit about my lemonade stand base trauma. So, we had a really incredible racket going on. My dad worked at a 99 cent store in Oceanside, California. And what he did is, well, he would shoplift a bunch of stuff from there. And so he would shoplift the Country Time lemonade. He would give it to me and my brother, pink lemonade, and then we would mix that with the appropriate amount of water and then we would put that in a giant gallon pitcher. And then we would sell cups of lemonade for a dollar outside of the 99 cent store that he stole that from in the first place. So he was stealing that 99 cent thing of Country Time Lemonade. Me and my brother were turning that probably into about 32 bucks. And that’s pure profit right there, baby. But then the owner found out and he got really mad at us because Yeah, we were like stealing from him technically. So, I’m probably never going to uh teach my kids how to do a lemonade stand. Hey, but what if you buy the Country Time lemonade powder? Yeah, but also I would I would want them to make it fresh. I would want to be like, “Hey, here’s how maybe fresh.” Okay. Yeah, maybe it’s fresh. I don’t know. I don’t know. Yeah, I don’t know where I’m going to be at in When do you sell lemonade as a child? 4 7 I’m saying the probably like 8 to 11 right now. 8 to 11. Yeah. Younger. No. No. Younger. Maybe that’s when you started. Younger. Yeah. We were probably like We probably I was probably seven. My brother’s probably I’ll probably stand and watch them. I’m not going to just let him hang out next to the 99 cent store. Yeah. We were there. No supervision. Well, my dad was working inside, you see. And so, we were outside. I don’t think that’s how I’m going to do it. Yeah. You shouldn’t. I don’t want to. But every time I see a lemonade stand now, I get a little bummed. A Well, how about this? I’m going to make a really cute stand. I’m going to teach my daughter. I’m having a girl. I’m going to teach her how to like build it out and stuff. And she’s going to handw write the sign and all that stuff. And then you can come get some lemonade from her and it’ll heal all of your wounds if not one of them. A it’ll work. One by one. It’ll work. Just have an open mind. I will. Therapy without paying anybody. That’s what this is. The only person I’m paying is your daughter for her lemonade. Yeah. And she’s not going to like upcharge you. She’ll be like, “Okay, Uncle Josh.” You know, it’ll be fine. Next question. It’s longer than I thought. That’ll be 02 E. Hi. So, me and my sisters, I have three sisters. And growing up, we used to get those uh TV dinners. They were like the banquet ones where it was fish stickicks, mac and cheese, and chocolate pudding. Mhm. And my sister, she would mix all three of them together and she would insist that it was the best thing that she’s like ever had. And of course, me and my other sister were very skeptical and we were like, “Ew, that’s so gross.” Until we tried it and it’s amazing. And I was just wondering if there’s any sort of like food science behind that. if those like compliment each other in some odd way or if we’re just freaks who like goop. Thank you. Well, I’m a freak that likes goop, but that’s Gwennneth Paltro’s macrobiotic deli. Would you call it a deli? I think it’s more of a restaurant. What did they say? I totally blacked out. So, the banquet fish stickick meal one. I grew up eating a ton of banquet TV dinners. Fish stick was not and we’re close to my top five. country fried steak. Okay, that was in the top five. They had something just called just called rib meal that was like a McRib style patty sitting in barbecue sauce. Um but the fish stick, my problem was there were equally cheap fish sticks that were better that you could just make as a standalone dinner like Gorton. Yeah. Or whatever the generic Gorton or Gordon. Gorton. Is it there’s a tea in there? Trust the Gortons fisherman. No, Vandys. Bandandy Camps was the uh quintessential fish stick brand, but the banquet fish stick meal came with chocolate pudding, macaroni and cheese, and fish stickicks. I cannot imagine maybe a objectively and I think even scientifically a worse combination of foods. This person would mix fish. What would they mix? Tell me. Fish sticks, mac and cheese, and chocolate pudding. Listen, man. Whenever your cool sister does something and you’re like, “She’s cool, man. and you have no choice but to accept it and also think it’s cool. Like when my sister used to wear body glitter, I was like, I want body glitter. It’s very normal. So like chicken strips meal, right? Let’s look at banquet chicken strips meal in elite banquet meal. Not all of these came with a dessert. For some reason, fish sticks did. But chicken strips cuz they felt bad cuz the fish sticks were probably gross. I’m like, here’s some chocolate pudding so you feel better. Chicken strips meal is corn mac and cheese chicken strips. little fried just patties that got super soggy but they’re super well salted. You mash all that into a paste. I think that’s almost a perfect paste. That’s a really really good paste, right? Cuz you get like the salty uh uh proteinrich brined chicken, right? Sweetness of the corn and then you get this like pleasant carbohydrate chew and the glutamates of the cheese. Like there’s a lot of science going on in there that makes it very good. Okay. To me, it’s the aromomas of fish, chocolate, and cheddar cheese that to me, none of those three things go together. I agree. I think that’s gross. But maybe it’s like when you mix the entire soda fountain together. No, man. You know, and it’s like the fun you had doing it. No, no. It’s It’s just older sister hype. If you had an older sister, you would get it. Yeah. There there might be a scientist who’s smarter than us who can tell you like, well, actually the the phenols of the chocolate blah blah. We don’t. We’re not that smart. We’re not smart enough to mash fish sticks with chocolate pudding. Not smart enough. Oh my goodness, that was funny. It’s not funny. It’s sexy. I just wanted to say that I like your show and um I just wanted to get your take on what is more get it together. More say it spiciest food in the world. Um, I think the spiciest dishes I’ve ever had were at Thai restaurants. And I used to think that Mexican was kind of spicy, but not anymore. That’s my take on it. Banquet sweet and sour chicken. Siren. So on the banquet, that was deceptively a banger. It just had this kind of like sweet corn syrupy sauce in it. God, so good. Spiciest cuisines in the world. This is very interesting. Le Oceanian is the spiciest I’ve ever had and I’ll stand by it. I It’s really interesting because I’ve talked everyone knows the idea of hey do you want let’s say mild, medium hot or Thai spicy. Yes. And if if waiter says Thai spicy that means like this is the real way that Thai people eat this dish. Normally we wouldn’t even offer it to a non- Thai person. Um but you know you’re there we’re going to do it. Uh recently my my white friend tried to order Thai spicy at a restaurant and he was there with my Indian friend. Shout out to shout out to Deep Nyak. Love you. Just got married. The Thai waiter like shot a look to Deep as just like a non-white person to be like, “Hey, is your white lying?” White lying actually handle his stuff. Is your white lying? What I have heard from a couple Thai chefs is it’s almost the opposite where they are making their food almost spicier than it would exist in Thailand. just because white people will taste very very spicy Thai food and go, “Oh my god, it’s so authentic.” Yeah. Yeah. Right. And so I’ve actually heard it pressured that way, which I think is really interesting. And a lot of Mexican chefs I’ve talked to um have, you know, talked about how like chilies in Mexico, they’re not meant to really be like spicy spicy spicy. They’re meant for like fragrance. They’re meant for fragrance and flavor. And hell, they started as medicine. And so I’ve had certainly a ton of spicy Mexican food, a lot of spicy Thai food. But I think a lot of this like this is supposed to be very spicy in everything is a little overblown in certain ways. Sure. I agree with you. But do you have an answer for them? Thai. Thai. I had a funny experience though at speaking of deep at Deep’s wedding, right? We were eating just tons of delicious Gujarati and Punjabi food everywhere and there’s of course you know the sweet tamarind chutney and the green chutney everywhere. um as a little when we’re doing choreographed dance practice, they ordered a bunch of like Middle Eastern food and it came with aug and all the old relatives see which looks almost identical to the green chutney and they’re like cool. And they’re just kind of splashing it all over their falafel and it was really really spicy and so every Indian relative that ate the was warning mostly the white people spicy. Hey, watch out that chutney is hot. So yeah, I’ve had a lot of really hot West African food. My aunt from Sagal makes this just like incredible scotch bonnet sauce. Um, yeah, I’d say Tai still probably takes it though. Hi Josh and Nicole. Longtime listener, big time fan. And I don’t really have an opinion. I more of have a question. My name is Meline from New York, the state, not the city. And you guys always have the most interesting book recommendations. And I would like your alltime comprehensive list of all of the very like influential books about food that you guys have read in your larger adult and post teen life. Thank you. Have a great day. Wow. Wow. I’m so sorry. I don’t read books anymore. Yeah, I tried to. I Something’s wrong with me. It’s an attention span thing. I think I might have undiagnosed ADHD. I have to figure it out. Um, I’m on my phone 10 to 11 hours a day. It’s really bad. And I don’t read anymore, but I miss reading. I bought books to read. I bought two books that I thought I’d be very interested in. And I read only 20 pages of one of them. The other one is collecting dust next to my freaking bed. What’s it called? Bed bedstand. Bedstand table. Bed table. I don’t know if you read books, maybe you know what it was called. You didn’t say that in your pick. I hate you. I hate you. But yeah, I don’t read anymore. So, I’m going to let Josh take this. I hate myself. It’s very flattering. I recently went back and reread um uh uh Kitchening Confidential by Anthony Bourdain and Medium Raw by Anthony Bourdain and like it’s such a fantastic moment in time. He actually shouts out in uh in Medium Raw, one of my favorite books about not food but restaurants of all time, Down and Out in Paris and London by George Orwell. Um another book that is incredible is uh How to Cook a Wolf by MFK Fischer. And these are all different points in times like George Orwell is written in I think the 20s. MFK Fischer, I believe, was written, god, was it during World War II? I think it was, but kind of back in that era. Um, one of my favorite modern food history books is Taco USA: How Mexican Food Conquered America by Gustavo Ariano. Um, that’s an incredible one. I think maybe the most beautiful pros about food is written by Ruth Rishel. I love Ruth Raichel so so so much. Um, God, Garlic and Sapphires is incredible, but she her newest book, Save Me the Plums, I thought was really really beautiful. And then for food and politics, uh, food politics by Mary and Nestle. Really, really great. Uh, what else do I like? What are the books? Sci-fi. The coffee book. The Monk of Mocha. Did you say that? By Dave Edgars. Robert Edgars. Which one of them directs horror movies? Robert Edgars. He’s a horror guy. Love Robert Edgars. The other Edgars. This is Dave Edgars then. Mhm. Um, you also read a book about Cod that you liked. Oh, Cod by Mark Kransky. Come on. That’s great. I’m in the middle. I’m reading Salt by Mark Klansky right now. Consider the fork is a great book. I know the book. What is wrong with me? I don’t read a book, but I know the books that you read. Blood, Bones, and Butter by Gabrielle Hamilton is fantastic. Think like a Chef by Tom Kio is fantastic. Surely there are other ones. I think you said enough. Yeah, I’m trying to think of because I feel like I have I’m like trying to picture on my bookshelf. Oh, Fresh Off the Boat by Eddie Hong is a fantastic memor turned into a show. Crying in HMart. I don’t know. Crying in HR Michelle’s honor. People say that one’s good. You didn’t read it. You just know it. Yeah. Because I have problems that I need to address soon. Yeah, that’s fair. That I’ll leave it at at those books for now, but if I remember any, you’ll just yell it on another podcast for a future date. And on that note, thank you so much for the sandwich. the podcast you’re currently listening to. Uh, we got new episodes audio platforms on Wednesdays, new episodes Sundays on the video platforms, but the way that people consume content now is just in one giant strange molasses flood where it either reaches you and you’re subsumed by it or it doesn’t. If you want to be featured in a pin or casserles, don’t ask me about books because I won’t have any recommendations. Give us a ring and leave a quick message at 833 dogpod 1. Oh my god. The uh uh the the third plate by Dan Barber. We had Dan Barber. We had Dan Barber on here. Omnivore’s Dilemma. Michael Pollen. Fantastic book. See you next time. Put food in.