ramble before you get into today’s episode it’s me trevor everetts the host of the podcast trevor talks too much here to tell you about a very special episode we have uh it’s gonna be all me solo not only will i be talking too much by my darn self but i’ll be giving you all a closer look into my mind the window into the inner workings of the mythical swag lord uh so i’ll be talking a bit more about me this particular episode is all about some of the struggles i’ve had coming out of the pandemic social anxiety and how some of these new connections have me kind of looking deeper into my inner self and doing some reflection so don’t forget to be on the lookout for this episode next week by subscribing to trevor talks too much on apple spotify or wherever you get your podcast grinder basted stuffed or deep fried are we kidding ourselves when you try to make turkeys tasty or is there really something to this thanksgiving tradition today we’re asking the question does turkey kind of suck this is a hot dog is a sandwich ketchup is a smoothie yeah i put ice in my cereal so what that makes no sense hot dog is a sandwich a hot dog is a sandwich welcome to our podcast a hot dog is a sandwich the show where we break down the world’s biggest food debates i’m your host josh sharer and i’m your host nicole handy zade and today we’re talking about turkey and turkey sucking because there’s been a big movement nicole there’s been a big movement in the online thanksgiving forums of which i am a huge part i just go on there to meet friends you know sure like-minded individuals like-minded individuals you know who want to discuss the holiday year-round but no there’s been a really big movement where people are railing against turkey saying that it should not be the centerpiece of your thanksgiving and then you should cook something quote unquote tastier like a prime rib or even a ham what do you think about that idea i’m gonna have to agree i think turkey sucks you’re team turkey sucking let me tell you what it is it’s not good it’s not my ideal protein i think chicken is delicious i think beef is delicious hell i think properly seasoned tofu is delicious you’re telling me you’d rather have a tofurky than a turkey i didn’t say tofurkey don’t be putting words in my mouth sir what i’m trying to say is that cooking a turkey properly is really really hard and a lot of people mess it up i don’t think the average cook in america knows how to make a proper turkey i’ve had a lot of dry crappy turkeys mmm that’s interesting i i grew up on dry crappy turkey but i also grew up on dry crappy every food because my parents weren’t just crappy cooks we didn’t come from a long line of cooks that said once i learned to take control of my turkey destiny i really started to appreciate how like delicious of an animal it just is turkey flesh the turkey delicious animals yes yes and i i used to be on team just roast a couple chickens because roast chicken is when done properly one of the most delicious things in the world but turkey i think has more character to the meat and i think that’s important when we’re doing something like a special occasion dinner like thanksgiving like when else are you ever going to roast a whole turkey you might as well do it once a year it’s like you might as well call your grandma on her birthday no man i i think like imagine making a beautiful prime rib with a beautifully seasoned butter gorgeous red interior with a stunning crisp meaty outside i just can’t listen i just the ratio of skin to meat also on a turkey really bothers me there’s such little skin and there’s just big honking pieces of flesh i can’t enjoy it save it save it for arbor day save the prime rib for arbor day trees you celebrate trees by eating prime rib because cows eat eat trees which are little trees nicole i don’t have time to explain science little trees grass look at it it’s little trees they’re a little pine tree yeah they’re stupid it produces little shine coats no i i i go ahead man speak your truth i don’t care i i do hear what you’re saying like i said i am very sympathetic to this idea because i’m i’m someone when i grow up on my table like we would have thanksgiving turkey and then on christmas we would have both turkey and ham that was just like our baseline american white people ass thanksgiving in christmas situation and i would always like wait for ham day because it’s not something that you actually have to make you know like hams just come pretty they come the way they’re done yeah exactly you put in the oven we’d pour like a bottle of coca-cola on it yeah put some cloves in it no we didn’t know what cloves were we took a ham we didn’t i mean no ham uh pineapple slices yup uh-huh we we took the whole ham from ralph’s when like my dad got a full-time teaching gig which is when we became lower middle class and not just poor uh-huh we would start getting honey-baked ham from the honey baked ham store and that was a huge huge spike in our quality of life where’s the honey big camp store oh they got the honey baked ham got stores all around really yeah so they used to be just like a male 1 on the west side buddy not in pico robertson where i hang out never have i ever seen a honey baked ham store i think the honey baked ham store should have tried to pivot to market to like the jewish market but do it so you ever go to like a cool like hipster kosher bakery and they have like all types of bacon that aren’t pork sure yeah you know yeah they should have done that with ham they should have made like beef hams no the word ham just shut creates a shutter through the body for them i guess it’s kind of different than bacon that at least has like hipster cultural appeal you go to a gastropub you get bacon on a burger you go to like a jewish gastropub and you’re like lamb belly bacon yeah oh my gosh the amount of times i used to get bullied for eating bacon literally i was like 22 years old and people would come up to me and be like so you like to eat bacon and ham and i look at them dead in the face and say yeah it’s really good have you tried prosciutto yet that’s the best and then they would just slink away and be like hey nicole don’t don’t antagonize the fellow never mean to me um but back to turkey again i just i just don’t understand like why people love it so much i get it it’s like a seasonal thing and people love seasonal things in the united states of america it’s the pumpkin spice it’s like the pumpkin spice of birds pumpkin spice is good but i think you kind of turkey has i love a gamey quality to me it’s in turkeys we take it for granted now because it’s in so many processed foods like yeah you turkey bacon you go to subway your subway get your turkey wow dated dated meme still good though that’s how you know how old someone is based on what memes they reference yeah yeah like yesterday we were discussing like the rangers the jerk dance group those were the viral videos of our high school era and trevor just had no idea what we were talking about what is jerking weirdos like it’s a dance we yike on it these days no but turkeys have a really lovely gamey quality to them and the meat is almost a little bit sinewy and tougher which i actually really enjoy are you trying to sell it by saying the word sinewy yes i am trying to sell it this is the old reverse psychology marketing no it’s the same reason i love meats like goat and lamb as opposed to beef there’s just more character to it chicken is water turkey is crystallite it just adds some fun well that makes so much sense i hate crystal like of course you hate turkey if you hate crystal light who who enjoys christmas other than midwestern moms i used to enjoy nicole i am your midwestern mom okay i’m your midwestern mom okay um you’re gonna go to soccer practice i’m gonna come give you give you the orange slices okay orange slices sorry hockey practice you’re gonna win the beauty pageant then you’re gonna explode in a tractor accident that’s a reference to the movie drop dead gorgeous gorgeous what a good movie i love it was it talking about crystal light no i think turkey is just a more fun version of chicken and also another way that i started to really enjoy turkey was understanding like how big it actually is in like mexican and salvadoran cooking really which is yeah actually really kind of interesting because turkeys are like indigenous to like north america well that makes sense yeah and so it’s like very much a native bird and so i went to the salvador corazon emile was the name of it what a great name yeah the heart and honey really beautiful name beautiful name r.i.p that restaurant is absolutely fantastic but they had this like turkey and mole dish and just getting that extra complexity from the turkey it was something that really made me you know turn on to it because we only do enjoy turkey in a processed foods and be like mostly crappy thanksgiving meals cooked by people um my dad’s best friend’s wife she’s a lovely mexican woman and she makes us turkey tamales for the holidays yeah so i guess it makes sense she puts an olive in it and then she puts a raja in it and then she puts a green bean in it that’s interesting yeah uh but yeah turkey like there’s a real fascinating history behind it right like benjamin franklin had this whole populist idea of trying to make turkeys the national bird of america but they’re dumb they’re dumb they’re done but no they’re they’re common right like all the founding fathers they wanted this kind of simple agrarian nation they represent the everyman turkeys i don’t know if this is true someone should eventually fact check this but i like to not fact check it so i can believe it that turkeys will die if they look up in the rain because it’ll just drown them no those are ostriches that put their head in the sand no turkeys look up and down monsters put their head in the sand yeah okay okay okay let’s let’s try and frame this what frame it what are you doing with your hand i’m i’m i’m taking what you’re saying and i’m picking it up and i’m putting oh you’re physically framing it yeah okay you mentioned that people are just crappy at cooking thanksgiving turkeys or just cooking turkey in general yeah it’s difficult which is difficult but would you say a prime rib is easier than a turkey because turkey you have to get i it’s more forgiving it’s still it’s it’s more i think prime rib is more forgiving than turkey because you got your really dry do you know how hard it is to defrost a turkey as someone who took three turkeys frozen from the grocery store and just threw them in the trunk of my 2017 certified pre-owned nissan altima yeah that’s right that means i can take it back to universal city nissan to get it to get it serviced whenever i want to go free of charge that’s amazing and that’s the universal city nissan guarantee i forgot that like car dealerships actually sponsored podcasts i probably shouldn’t be doing that whatever i got i had a great time there as someone who just threw three frozen turkeys in my trunk assuming they would defrost in 12 hours when we needed them for a shoot and they did not they were still icy i guess i do understand that but like i don’t know prime rib to me because that seems to be the main contender in this discourse so you would eat prime rib maybe that is what like the new school kind of foodie people seem to insist on is that prime rib should be the new large service large format main course of choice for all holidays i would also eat a whole duck i would do a goofy whole duck kind of so this is actually i would do a goose wait geese actually suck people talk about geese like they’re the goose meat is bad is it goose meat’s worse than turkey when’s the last time you actually had it never in my life i wanted to try it but now you just soiled it you soiled my geese your soil’s my geese josh sounds like a horrible innuendo for something hey ever gotten your geese sword hey hot doggers we wanted to tell you about our exciting upcoming event mythical heck yeah we do mythical is our first ever immersive weekend experience with the mythical kitchen rhett and link and a big old bunch of the mythical crew there’s a carnival a dance party live podcast it’s gonna be huge it’s on october 28th to the 30th in austin texas for one weekend only so you don’t want to miss it check out mythicontickets.com for ticket availability event details and any updates tickets are on sale now including packages chalk full of super exclusive merch and a very special sunday brunch with your favorite mythical crew members and we all know your favorite mythical crew member is nicole head over to mythicontickets.com right now to check out availability uh last thanksgiving actually my brother and i you know we don’t have like a ton of family in the area and so we decided to do like a small hipster foodie wino thanksgiving i think i remember yeah didn’t you overcook your pie oh i burnt my pie pie i remember yeah i was drinking boulevardiers or no i was drinking french 75s because we’re a little fancy boys lovely cocktail and then i burnt my pies but the pies were a um i used chinese almond cookies to make the crust and then i made a jasmine milk tea custard yum with like a a red bean a sweetened red soup yeah i would do without the red beans yeah honestly the red beans are great it should have been just custard but what i’m saying is we did this whole kind of like foodie hipster very sort of chinese cooking inflected meal we did like greens with exo sauce you know my brother did a whole five-spice roasted duck oh fatty and all that yeah it was really lovely um except the whole roasted duck really kind of sucked and this speaks to another problem that like cooking an entire animal like that when you’re trying to roast things to particular temperatures kind of sucks because what’s the best way to cook say a duck breast you score it and you sear it to what to what temperature uh is this a test no i’m saying i don’t get this answer right are you gonna kick me out of the kitchen yes because we always cook classic french duck breasts well no i’m just saying like medium rare or like medium right 140. yeah i’m saying you’re not cooking it all the way through no no yeah yeah but then the best way to cook say a duck leg is confit which are the opposite of cooking methods yeah confit is long low and slow cooking it down to render all of its fat and just shred it we have duck legs into the kitchen oh we totally oh my god we have a bunch of dope aromatics too okay i’m gonna tell trevor real quick we got the sorry we got distracted yeah nicole is literally texting trevor to start confiying our duck trevor has been alerted that we’re going to comfy ducks i’m really excited what a good day for us oh my god back to my point about cooking whole animals a duck breast is best medium rare with all that fat rendered out okay duck legs are best cold feed at a very low temperature for a long time okay so how the hell are you going to accomplish that when they’re on the same carcass really simple so one thing that i learned in culinary school when i was cooking um i cooked quail for the first time at school yeah and i was really really curious on how to cook it properly my teacher mitchell frieder who is my favorite person yeah we love mitchell i love mitchell frieder more than any other human on the face of this earth he is a wonderful person literally taught me everything i know he you take foil and you put it in the freezer for a little bit and you make a breast plate and then you put it on the quail as it’s roasting well so does that insulate it from the heat so it gets yes interesting yes that’s something he taught me but then i guess that speaks to the further point that like cooking whole animals properly is very difficult to do i agree but turkey is like one of those things that’s so sentimental to people they’ll just do it willy-nilly and not know how to do it properly yeah i mean that’s exactly what we did like we had the same dry turkey every year that you absolutely had to soak in heinz canned gravy is what we would use because none of us knew how to cook um but that said when my brother and i like really learned how to cook and started making our own learn how to brine turkeys when to tent when to base all this stuff is when i really learned that like oh crap turkey can be really delicious i guess grinding turkey is the biggest difference yeah i mean we’re lucky and blessed that we are so passionate about food that we actively seek out ways to make food taste good that’s interesting i’m talking about the everyman like the everyman’s turkey sucks joe turkey pack joe turkey pack joe turkey it’s a play on joe six-pack but it didn’t there was no pun there was no pun there strike that from the record okay that was a dumb joke oh so sorry i was dumb um yeah i mean the average turkey isn’t good like a steak a steak is good uh oh chicken chicken’s good steak i don’t know i grew up thinking that i hated steak because my parents would just unseasoned throw it into the broiler but no think of my parents as you know an average representation are they well i’d be curious if you actually took them like if you put everyone in america on a scale of like 1 to 100 as far as how good of a cook they are put it on a strict bell curve uh-huh and then you took the median of that i wonder what their cooking would taste like that’s a really i think that should be something we do that would be really interesting for me to find out possible i don’t know how we could it’s like a census yeah we need about consensus maggie we need like a special budget of nine trillion dollars culinary census yeah 2022 we’re going to do this but i am really curious to see like what the dead-on average american cook cooks like because my parents were probably worse than the average american cook i think my parents are pretty good cooks yeah yeah but also my dad hates turkey too so maybe it’s genetic it could be we do not have turkey in the house ever unless it’s like some weird like hormel turkey like the sliced crap yeah i love that give me the process yeah yeah process me my dad loves processed meat for some reason he’s also an arby’s super fan arby’s has the most processed meat in the game it tastes like wet paper soaked in msg and i love it i honestly i love arby’s so much yeah my i think i should get my dad an arby’s merch i thought you should yeah we literally had arby’s jumpsuits in here we asked ask david or something if we can fight for my time yeah oh man i thought i hated this is just the podcast of things that josh thought he hated until he had a good i thought i hated legit roast beef because it didn’t taste like arby’s no well that’s different because it’s such a signature snap to it yeah it’s it’s like that beautiful processed pink with the little the golden it’s so funny but again i don’t i don’t know where my dislike of also like ground turkey trash ground turkey is the most soulless i drink like drink god i eat like three pounds of ground turkey a week because when i’m cooking at home like i eat so many flavorful tasty things yeah i work when i’m cooking at home like i make tasty flavorful meals and i treat myself and whatnot but a lot of times i’m just like give me protein give me starch give me vegetable and i’ll just like throw ground turkey and crap in a pot go take a shower come out pour sauce on it and eat it yeah i don’t find it but i agree that it is soulless it’s like the water of proteins yeah it doesn’t do anything for me like turkey bacon sucks too uh anything other than like processed turkey breast doesn’t really taste good unless i have someone who’s an artist who’s like amazing unbelievably undeniably talented at cooking a turkey turkey like a whole turkey i’m not gonna enjoy it that’s i wonder if we have a negative view of turkey because of this low-fat diet craze of the 80s that a lot of our parents kind of did do your parents like do any of that diet i was raised on snack wells snack oh my god this snackwell’s devil foods cookies do you remember those why did we have the same childhood because we grew up in the same time you’re just one year older than me when you think about it it means i had another year of eating snackwell devil’s food they’re the texture on those they’re so delicious chewy and almost so good but a cookie can we find do they still make that i would kill for one of those i would love i would dip it in my espresso right now oh my god okay but what i’m saying both our parents seem to have that kind of like weird low fat low calorie cottage cheese cottage cheese all the time and then all of the products that were lower fat than their legit counterparts were made of turkey yes like i grew up grilling turkey burgers and one you can’t even like grill a turkey burger because the meat is so loose and it falls apart so i grew up eating these crappy turkey burgers that were just like mashed into the grill for sure and half ground and all that so i think i did grow up with that negative connotation of turkey yeah you know one dry thanksgiving bird and then just like crappy flavorless soulless ground turkey all the time yeah but i wonder if there is like because what i talked about like it is a real movement right now where people are talking about like don’t cook turkey on thanksgiving and i think it’s probably from a lot of people from our generation that makes it raised on this ground turkey low-fat industrial complex that makes a lot of sense to me by the way yeah it makes sense but do you think it sucks no i i still don’t though i still don’t but i think it takes i think you need that activation energy that escape velocity to leave places no for real you need to break the illusion that turkey is a substitute similar you brought up tofu earlier right yeah tofu is a delicious dish that is made from the pressed separated soy curds right been around for centuries right millennia right i mean tofu has been eaten in in china for millennia and then it kind of exploded in america in the 70s with this kind of like hippie crunchy movement so people now in america often associate tofu with like bland white typically vegan food no whereas you’d eat mapo tofu yeah the sichuan dish covered in delicious ground pork in sichuan chilies delicious absolutely delicious yeah so i think we view turkey as this crappy substitute meat for a better meat when it doesn’t have to be that way hmm i never thought of it that way until you broke it down like that right yeah i guess but it doesn’t change your mind i don’t know like if you put a turkey burger in front of me versus okay let’s think about verses like first yeah like a turkey burger versus a regular burger no no a roasted turkey breast versus a duck breast um no duck no duck but butt butt butt that’s not the whole duck if it was a perfectly cooked duck breast okay but who’s eating a whole turkey well i’m saying like that’s that’s that’s what you have to do the verses with no i don’t i’m talking about individuals i’m okay let me keep going we’re not just talking about turkey in relation to thanksgiving then we’re talking about okay okay no no okay okay different i’m going to talk about different turkey variations i’m all riled up on the vision of benjamin franklin franklin you said frankelin benjamin franklin silva’s franklin okay turkey bacon versus beef bacon versus beef bacon have you read beef bacon i’ve never had good beef bacon what about duck bacon i’d go i’d go duck bacon over turkey bacon okay turkey bacon’s not terrible though if you don’t think it as bacon stop i’m just an apologist no stop being an apologist uh let’s think about uh a turk mole with turkey turkey mole yeah chicken mole turkey okay that’s unique uh a chicken drumstick versus a turkey drumstick chicken okay um uh what are some other oh uh tacos like ground turkey tacos like in a healthy multitude let’s see so you’ve only said yes to one of those things and that’s because you’ve had it done by a specialist probably who loves turkey and is incredibly well crafted at making turkey but think about all the other times you’ve eaten turkey i would rather have a perfectly cooked and seasoned turkey breast okay then mmm am i gonna say it am i gonna eat these words and regret it let’s see say it oh then a well cooked steak i why i think i i know that people some some people who listen to the show uh hate me and that’s fine and they’re like josh is just a contrarian he argues to argue one that’s the show you dummy uh that’s the whole reason this exhibit we’ve done like 50 episodes or something dummy uh but no i i also think that steak is kind of overrated and i i think people i do i do i think that it’s it’s tough to cook really perfectly uh and i think you know i don’t know taste for taste sometimes i would rather have a perfectly cooked piece of bird flesh than cow flesh and i don’t think there’s anything like you know endemic to cow flesh that makes it better than bird if that makes sense well you and i are clearly different people i would rather eat a filet mignon than a turkey breast any day of the week yeah i mean now that i’m thinking about it though like a perfectly cooked piece of prime rib do you consider like a prime rib and a steak to be on equal levels of kind of like importance because like when we talk about thanksgiving we want like a big showpiece right yeah i understand the the opulence of it all yeah i get it so no i don’t think prime rib and steak are the same yeah i would you which one do you prefer um well when i was growing up i went to lori’s uh whenever we celebrated anything if it was my sister’s engagement if it was my brother getting into law school if it was me getting a c on a math test yeah it didn’t matter uh lori’s prime rib was the spot it was the kicket spot for me and my family for special occasions so laurie’s blend prime rib holds a very special place in my heart because i grew up with it yeah but now like just just for the ease of it i enjoy a steak too so i don’t really know how to answer that because it depends on my mood it depends on the celebration depends on the day but i do love both very much yeah i actually to me prime rib has this kind of specialness to it and i don’t know if it’s just because my own experiences but i remember uh you know i talked about when my dad like became a teacher and we were finally had like a little bit of disposable income um we went on like a vacation up to san francisco we like drove up the coast and we camped along the way to save money and we like went out to a special dinner and i loved through this time i was like 10 years old was it at the house of private it was at the house of primary i knew it it was i knew it unbelievable and it was really good no i think it would have been 12 at the time yeah um but being there and i think i was wearing like basketball shorts and flip-flops because that’s what 12 year old me dressed like it’s what i also dress like now but i now would have put on clothes so she’s got this restaurant but you know they wheel around the cart and all that and they got the sides on it and they ask you what cut you want you get to feel like you’re sort of in control there’s a certain interactive element to it which i guess could be also said for turkey but there does seem something like richer and more opulent about primary but i mean one because it’s like 50 times more expensive um but two you know there’s like pomp and circumstance about it of course whereas i feel like thanksgiving has that but it’s in this much more kind of you know i think of 80s movies where the dad the useless dad right has the electric turkey carver and he can’t quite carve the turkey right yeah and you know the mom’s all hand-picking them you know i think of that kind of like weird media nostalgia that i think people associated with and maybe don’t have a taste for anymore isn’t there a famous photo of a family dinner where she’s putting yeah what is it is it called americana is that what the is that i think i think i’m thinking of the freedom from want uh um freedom from want i don’t know but there’s a very famous photo it’s like turkey dinner freedom from want by norman rockwell this one yep that’s the one like that’s just a quintessential thanksgiving picture you know what i mean like that’s americana to me it is and there’s also like a bunch of politics behind that picture so it’s like a picture of a family it looks like a grandma she’s serving this giant turkey there’s a kind of like old white guy sort of like hovering behind her a bunch of smiling happy white children in it and it was used to represent this was actually painted in world war ii and it was used to represent this sort of like american bounty right but at the time that this was going on like all the european countries were in the middle of bombing raids and going through like crazy wartime rations and stuff like that and so it kind of created apparently this resentment in europe because of that but i think this picture perfectly exemplifies why right now some people are like turning away from turkey because it does represent this like white bred americana vision of what you should be eating on the day where you’re thankful right yeah there are honestly a lot of like political ties to literally everything you eat and i think that might be a kind of rejection of like our parents values like our parents maybe normal ass turkey we don’t want to but for me just protein for protein taste for taste i do think turkey’s gotten a bad rap because of all these political influences behind why people’s tastes evolve i mean what’s more american than a thanksgiving dinner with a turkey nothing giving dinner with a giant texas longhorn cattle we should be roasting whole cows [Music] all right nicole we’ve heard what you and i have to say now it’s time to find out what other wacky ideas are rattled around the internet it’s time for a segment we call opinions [Music] they’re like sweet potato casseroles you put marshmallows in them and then you light them on fire are you okay no i’m never okay i’m okay i i we i joke i live a pretty balanced life well balanced in what it means to me you know eat sleep workout sleep rave repeat eat sleep rave repeat oh you were yeah you wouldn’t let me finish it’s okay you can take the first one all right marissa heaning says cheez-its and apple cider are the best food combo i don’t like apples and cheese this opinion bores me because everybody knows that cheese it’s an apple cider are delicious did you ever eat apple juice and cheez-its as a kid it’s the same as that thing man it just has more carbonation what do you mean carbonation you’re thinking of sparkling cider what’s the difference with apple cider and sparkling sauce oh wait for this if it’s if it’s yellow you got juice there fella if it’s brown you’re in cider town what the fruit shout out to friend of the show bill oakley that’s a simpsons joke i am 95 sure he wrote that i will tweet him to check it out uh oh so am i wrong oh sorry sorry cider’s not always sparkling like martinelli’s is like sparkling cider they may be talking about that i don’t know but when i hear cider i just think of like the brown apple juice that’s unfiltered i don’t think i’ve ever heard that before it’s good it’s typically like heavily spiced you some people drink it warm some people drink it ice cold yeah yeah i love these apples later and i love me some cheez-its i just don’t necessarily need them together and i don’t like putting cheese on my apple pie me either but i do respect marissa heaning’s opinion and you keep doing boo rollin from just in space says bacon peanut butter and ruffles on toast is amazing yeah that sounds like a munchy meal if i’ve ever heard of one rail gin how much gin did you rail before you made bacon peanut butter and ruffles on toast that sounds incredible it’s a munchie meal you know what i love about this is like the attention to detail on it yeah because i imagine they like put the peanut butter on the toast and they’re like no no real gin you can do better and then they’re like you know that like salty smoky bite of bacon might work and they put it on they’re like okay this is looking pretty good but i don’t think i’m done yet we need some garnish what about a little extra crunch from the ruffles i think this is an incredibly smart dish yeah i think you plated it right this could be on any fine dining menu dude ruffles are just croutons for sandwiches that’s a good i prefer lays in my sandwiches okay it depends on the sandwich we’re talking about base cities we’re getting the sweet onion maui yup yeah yeah the bread strength yeah ruffles are thicker ergo can stand up to a harder bread yeah whereas lays need a more tender bread because they are thinner and crispier correct why are we on the same page on this nonsense opinion because we’re crazy all right ira elliot says my parents claim they taught me to put salt on tomato slices i disagree while i can appreciate salt on a tomato it’s true calling is to be covered in a layer of plain white sugar this is an interesting point the tomato deserves to live like the fruit it was meant to be hold on okay no hold on no it’s to me this is a really interesting point because i mean like you said tomatoes are fruit and it does have a lot of natural sugars and it also has a lot of sort of vegetable tasting compounds has that umami has that msg it’s also a little bit saline that said avocados got the same thing i mean think about carrots so you can put carrots and carrot cake like carrots can you look sweet sure but i’m not gonna dump sugar avocado and hollow you ever just put i mean i know you put condensed milk on avocado i don’t but i’ve heard of it happening when you put honey on avocados yeah i put honey but i mean that to me is kind of the same thing i’ve never just had straight tomatoes or sugar okay let me tell you what it is so i used to hate tomatoes when i was younger very link like of me i know but until i put a ton of salt on them and i ate them like an apple i didn’t i like didn’t even know so this is the exact opposite and it makes me want to recoil i’m actually i used to hate eating raw tomatoes too i don’t ever forget i was at my nana’s cabin in the pooka news your nana had a cabin in the pokemon oh my nana had a beautiful lake house in the poo canoes but uh we we would always go to this really lovely little ice cream parlor and i would get a peanut butter flavored ice cream dipped in peanut butter magic shell and it was lovely but i was eating dinner with banana she goes josh if you don’t eat your vegetable i can’t do my nana’s a drink yeah you can do it do it do it do it do it josh if you don’t eat your vegetables you can’t go get ice cream after and i was like nana what what kind of vegetables you just sliced a whole ass tomato and put it on my plate and she goes that’s your vegetables josh and so i just you know you can go to a diner and get tomato slices on the side that’s for old people old people might i love bananas she’s just older that’s why your name is we got to put salt and pepper on it you got to see these were plain tomato slices and they were just like the seediest romas just wanted you to have a little bit of vegetables oh no my nana was absolutely right i should have eaten them but at the time i was a child didn’t have the palate i do now and like the texture of the seeds in my mouth is so gross that i like gagged and almost vomited so i i get the like hating raw tomato thing like you used to and like link um but that said now i’m over that and i really want to try tomatoes with sugar good opinion ira elliott thank you aguer127 i microwave bread because i want it warm but not crispy yes yes okay uh yes 100 i you know what my special snack is daily my special snack daily is not daily but like whenever i’m hella stressed out i take a slice of white white american bread and then i put a square of white american cheese and then and i put in the microwave for 22 seconds and then i remove it and then i i give it a little flip just to see like how how like uh wet it got and then i fold it on top of each other and then i make myself like a little half bs grilled cheese that’s my stress meal i saw you made that like your second week working here and i was like what are you doing in here because like you know i think when we first started working together we may have both had some sort of errors put on we were afraid to really show our true colors oh have you been oh like when you first worked here the first day i like took you to like oh it’s this cool kosher israeli kebab spot like let’s go have lunch they like learn about each other and we’d like talk about what restaurants in l.a we loved and then it took like a week for us to be like yeah mostly just like microwave bread and cheese and put some hot sauce on it nicole what did i eat for breakfast this morning you had a hamburger bun with buffalo butter from italy but what did i what did i do to that hamburger you put it in the microwave for 15 seconds and then you took it out after three seconds because the beeps bother you was yeah i i honestly i’m i’m an anti-toaster i think that bread is perfectly cooked the first time around and you just need to warm it back up and the microwave is the perfect tool to do that i cannot this is why i love this segment so much because as many like bad opinions we may get i still respect you get one where it’s like yeah hey garrett127 i see you yeah we also microwave bread because we both want it warm but not crispy i agreed agreed all right that person who reads books ranch on pizza or salsa on pizza is good salsa on pizza you say if we’re talking california pizza kitchen rips tostada pizza i do sauce on that yeah but now that i’m thinking about it i have one of my things about leftover pizza is i don’t like it heated up or even cold because the sauce kind of condenses and loses moisture sure so i’ll always try and if i have tomato sauce i’ll like add some more back on the pizza okay you’re so bougie right but i’m not boozy i’m just particular um because i’m still microwaving day-old pizza but i have been out of tomato sauce and just used a salsa it wasn’t even a tomato base also it was like a chipotle and tomatillo sauce okay on the pizza and it was really good so i i do i do respect this yeah i think sometimes you know whenever you have a little el pollo loco salsa and you dip your pizza in it i i do that that’s why loco salsa is pretty much uncooked marinara and i don’t dislike it no talking about the green one oh the the yeah the avocado sauce yeah yeah that is the best mass serving salsa in the game it’s real good i had el polio look did i tell you what you went to el polio last night you did yeah i got the last two pieces of chicken at the bourbon wow dream big dream big josh i literally said to the employee like y’all moving that much chicken these days and he’s like you’d be surprised damn i am i’ll boil loko’s living el pollo also they have a new thing called a crispy tamale bowl really what’s the crispy tamale ball i don’t know i just wanted the chicken but next time i might get that they’re burritos they’re california burritos or dink dude they got the new tapatio fries yes that’s the one i had oh my god real good it was real good we’re such a stupid big el po el pollo loco is the best fast food i would say so yeah talk a lot about taco bell i’ll play a local unsung hero yeah uh lewis is a boy says tiramisu is a casserole okay no it’s a trifle no yeah tiramisu is a trifle ah no yes yes sweet casserole trifle eat and miss eat mess is it eating mess or eton mess what are those eton mess eating mess i said eat and mess i said eat i thought it was eton it’s a british dessert that’s like it’s like strawberry trifle meringue yeah yeah yeah yeah you’ve had an eat to miss those desserts don’t do a ton for me tiramisu doesn’t do a ton for me okay i don’t like tiramisu because i don’t like coffee in my desserts i like coffee on the side of my desserts other than ice cream i don’t understand why you would put coffee in any sort of dessert best dessert bamiya and zubia josh is trying to be persian sober i just want to be persian no those are literally my two favorite i mean there’s also the um india i mean like gulab jamun yeah is that that’s nice god what’s there’s an indian version of bamiyan forgot what it’s called after what it’s called but yeah just like crispy kind of pastry soaked in honey in honey syrup um that’s what i don’t i don’t need fancy desserts like that give me something sweet to eat with coffee okay what’s your favorite dessert like what do you want my favorite dessert of all time it’s cheesecake i love cheesecake i also love chocolate mousse i love but do you love that in the context of a meal or do you just love that like eating it you know kind of at any time any time i had a chocolate chip cookie for breakfast i literally came in i came in and i felt really guilty and i just came like hey i put a cookie on the company card but i ate it all sorry it happens it happens all right at peyton black lynch fried eggs on spaghetti that’s all you know i’ve tried to do i have tried to do the breakfast pasta thing and for me for some reason i am a huge advocate of your body doesn’t know what time of day it is you might as well eat you know a breakfast burrito for dinner you might as well eat spaghetti for breakfast etc but for some reason for me a fried egg on spaghetti did not work for my particular palette not on like red sauce spaghetti like if you made like a creamy white sauce and you chopped up some bacon in there through a little bit of you know spinach and then you put a fried egg yeah that makes sense but just like straight up like spaghetti with like tomato sauce no that doesn’t work for me you know i think it is for me i think it’s the texture of egg whites is too similar to the texture of pasta oh okay you know that’s where it that’s where it breaks for me i guess that makes sense to me yeah yeah it’s says spaghetti sauce is better on rice because it soaks up the sauce versus pasta where it just falls to the bottom your pasta has an upside and a downside you what no i know what they’re saying and i know what the problem is okay tell me because i don’t get it we don’t okay so speaking as the person who grew up with probably a 30th percentile if not lower parents who cooked right the way that we would make pasta is you would boil the spaghetti you would put it in a giant serving bowl plain with probably a quarter cup of pasta water that just fell to the bottom and then you would put it on your plate and then you would sauce it directly on your plate oh no no no so that’s the problem right no no no that’s what i think they’re talking about the sauce falling to the bottom interesting okay so what you should be doing is cooking your pasta to just before you like it how you to just before the doneness that you like it and then you should be sauteing that pasta in the sauce okay because that way the noodles actually soak up the sauce which is essentially the same theory behind the rice right yeah if you were to put spaghetti sauce on kind of watery white rice then it would also fall to the bottom it would be great i understand what you let your pasta sauce saute it in the sauce then plate it um however there is a special dispensation for filipino spaghetti to not do that because filipino spaghetti is better i think there’s so much sugar in the sauce it just keeps it kind of like suspended yeah and then all the the grated yellow cheese on it yeah if you don’t suggestion you should try your pasta sauces your spaghetti sauce on polenta give that a try it’s like the perfect medium between rice and pasta are you talking like grit style polenta or polenta cake oh grit style i don’t like polenta cakes i love them no no no the fried polenta no no no i hate that stuff just give me some beautiful sloppy soft polenta that falls on the plate like a beautiful piece of lace yeah i can’t top that i’m done i’m out kangaroo putting an expensive ingredient in a basic slash inexpensive dish makes it better this is a little show called fancy fast food it’s out every thursday no it’s out occasionally um but yeah i mean that’s one of the best bites of food i’ve ever had was uh caviar i had snuck into a fancy food event with a fake id when i was 19. my brother got me tickets for my birthday um it was unbelievable and i was drinking champagne and i put um they put creme fresh on a lace potato chip with caviar interesting and it was this like you know lay’s potato chip familiarity with this very expensive beautiful caviar and a little bit of creme fraiche to kind of like you know wash it down it had all the familiarity of like chips and french onion dip except with this beautiful product on it and i think that’s a really powerful combination is that like you know expensive delicious ingredient with the nostalgia and familiarity high low high low we call it high low in the industry in the industry uh yeah but again like it can’t just be a willy-nilly random ingredient like you putting a fist fistful of saffron in your spaghetti bolognese costco hot dog yeah like it needs to be intentional i think is the most important thing like if you’re gonna put something in an expensive ingredient in there make sure it’s an intentional ingredient don’t just be you know ostentatious and wild with it like we are on fancy fast food sometimes it works yeah on the rare occasion whenever you’re being like uber uber fancy it’ll all come together and be just one fancy mess but typically just be a little bit have a little bit of awareness whenever you’re doing that and you’ll be successful one time in the office we had caviar left over from a thing and i just put it on an oscar mayer bologna sandwich pretty good not gonna lie pretty good what’s what’s like an expensive ingredient that you think people should have on hand and like can’t add to things just to make it better uh saffron yeah yeah but saffron is such a heavy i mean i guess you just need like one you need one thread yeah one thread completely well you have to get good saffron try to get iranian saffron i’m not just saying that because i am iranian a lot of spanish saffron that’s sold here has a lot of food dye in it and it has a very accurate iodine taste to it specifically the fake ones that you get from like the store go to like a legit saffron person the back market in a fruit nut area of a persian market is where you get it you look at the guy with the mustache and his shirt open halfway to his tummy and his name is probably like uh like jahangir or something and you just go saffron and he shakes his head and like pinches his eyes together and then you give him 20 and he gives you like an ounce and you just walk away quietly sorry what does that happen yeah yeah yeah cool i want to go that’s how i get saffron that’s how i get my saffron how about you josh oh that’s a good question i i don’t know i mean i i use like nice expensive hot sauces certainly don’t go to secret saffron dealers in the fruit and nut section of persian markets but no i’m actually trying to think if there is something that i would like recommend people having like i think a good smoked gray sea salt is a really cool thing salt is important like not like himalayan pink salt some salt that actually has you know a sort of additive to it in a way so it’s like smoked greasy salt for me if you just replace normal salt with that on any protein it’s gonna like taste a lot better i love grey salt yeah okay last one of the day hey i’m full says a spoonful of nutella licked like a lollipop makes a great dessert gonna look like lick that nutella like a lollipop okay uh i’m sorry this is my childhood my mom would literally ration it out to me and my friends after our big spaghetti party with the paper let’s talk about your big spaghetti parties yeah our spaghetti party with the with the newspapers on the floor she would take a spoonful of nutella on a plastic spoon and just give it to us my mom’s really a great lady like i can’t wait for you to meet me i want to meet shella somewhere she’s the best so yeah so this nutella i still do this to this day with nutella but also peanut butter but mostly nutella i’m not the biggest nutella fan i like to put peanut butter on a spoon and then i cover the whole thing in honey and i kind of tongue out the middle of it and try and ration honey hey maggie’s staring at me with daggers right now let me tongue out my honey peanut butter spoon don’t look at me and on that note thank you for listening to a hot dog as a sandwich if you want to hear more from us here in the mythical kitchen we got new episodes for you every wednesday if you want to be featured on opinions or like casseroles you can hit us up on twitter at mythicalchef or and handyzade with the hashtag opinioncasserole and for more mythical chicken for more mythical chicken check us out on youtube where we launch new videos every week and of course if you want to share pictures of your turkey dishes hit us up on instagram at mythical kitchen we’ll see you next time mythical chicken that should be our first product that we sell okay cool but it’s fake chicken because it’s mythical not real yeah it’s just a turkey [Music] thanks for listening to this episode of a hot dog as a sandwich and hey before you go we wanted to remind you that season two of stevie’s podcast best friend’s back all right is underway this season expands on stevia and nagin’s friendship from last season but explores all new themes and ideas yeah episodes will feature an open conversation with a gynecologist who just happens to be nakeen’s sister the ins and outs of eel sex and a deep dive into the most embarrassing items to be found by security at the airport things get crazy this season so be sure to follow best friends back all right on apple podcast spotify or wherever you get your podcast all right i like that me too all right all right all right