Trick or treat. >> Smell my feet. >> Give me fullsize candy bars or else I’m going to riot. >> You’re still going to smell my feet? >> This is a hot dog as a sandwich. >> Ketchup is a smoothie. >> Yeah, I put ice in my cereal. So what? >> That makes no sense. >> A hot dog is a sandwich. >> A hot dog is a sandwich. >> What? Welcome to our podcast, A Hot Dog is a Sandwich, the show we bring up some mild foot stuff. My name is Josh Sher >> and I’m the uni bomber for Halloween. >> Oh my god. Ted Kazinski, is that you? >> Yeah, Josh, I got you a Halloween costume. >> Um, are you allowed to dress as the uni bomber? >> Um, you mean like for reasons like bad reasons? >> Yeah. Like are No. Like, are people >> are people going to be upset about this? >> Yeah. Yeah. >> We’ll start again. >> Uh, no. No, no. Just drop a drop a link in the comments if >> we’ll start over. >> If you think making a joke out of domestic terrorism is funny. Oh, I think that I think people do find it funny. >> Okay, fine. Hold on. >> Cuz if you I Okay, listen. I don’t know. >> But I look like weirdo Yankee. >> I just if I can break the fourth wall here. I don’t know if I have any personal convictions or morals anymore at all. I don’t know if I have any thoughts. All I know is I I’d like people on the internet. >> Do I look like the uni bomber? Yes or no? You look like a fabulous unib. >> I don’t know what’s okay and not anymore. But all I know is I I hear a lot more kids making 911 jokes and they seem to find that very funny. So if you find I don’t know if you find that funny, you might find the uni bomber funny. >> Jet fuel can’t melt steel beams. That’s what the kids say. Does that fit you? >> I’m a mouse. >> Duh. >> We’re talking all I really I don’t >> Happy Halloween for all the viewers out there. >> I fully don’t understand where culture has gone. I’m simply so so scared. I’m so scared. Happy Halloween. >> I’m so frightened out there >> of what’s going on. I don’t know. Everything’s a reaction to a reaction to a reaction and and and it’s just moving so fast >> and I don’t know what you find okay anymore. You know what I find okay is is eating candy. >> An ounce of chills. Can you just like possess a single iota of chill? >> I don’t understand this desperate cultural mechanism and where it’s going. It’s just a It’s just a boulder rolling downhill, just catching more and more snow on it the closer it gets to the base. And I feel like it’s about to roll over us. And we’re eating nerds today. >> So, we’re going to be um ranking Halloween candies today. And I used to love trick-or-treating. I was a big trick-or-treater. Um I would go to all the cool neighborhoods. I would I would love to just gallivant around and wear silly costumes with my friends. I would never wreak havoc, though. There was only treats. Never tricks. Never once did I do tricks. only treats. >> Yeah. >> I never I never did the toilet paper thing. I never egged someone’s house. There used to be a street actually called Walden where kids would throw shaving cream at each other on Walden. And then one year um someone um put Nare in the shaving cream and the kids hair fell out. >> So that’s >> Now that’s a trick. Now that’s a trick I can get behind. >> So that’s the kind of environment I grew up in. Except I never went to Walden. Only one year I think I went. Um so yeah. >> What about you? Do you like trick-or-treating? >> I have fond memories of trick-or-treating. >> You do? Okay, good. Good ones, bad ones. >> Good ones. >> Fair ones. Okay, good. >> Good ones. This is Happy Josh childhood memory. >> Yes. >> I gallivant. >> We got one, folks. >> I gallivant around with my friends. I, you know, couldn’t afford expensive costumes or nothing. We’d make do. >> Were you a pillowcase kid or were you a pale kid? >> Pillowcase kid. >> Okay. I had a >> pillowcase kid. >> I had a I had a literal jacko’lantern pale. >> We go around and nothing bad or sad ever happened to me on Halloween. Are you being serious? >> Yeah, I’m being serious. Okay. >> I just had a nice time collecting candy and then I’d come home and I’d like unload all the candy onto like, you know, the studio apartment floor that we shared or like, you know, my dad’s like girlfriend’s like drug dealer son who was living with us. Sometimes he’d eat a lot of our candy, but that’s just because >> he was high a >> and that was fine. He was cool. You can’t blame him. >> We played video games with him, man. >> You can’t blame him for that. >> He was a pretty rad dude. >> Okay. You played like Tony Hawk? >> Yeah, I played Tony Hawk one and two. >> Okay. >> Yeah. Good. >> I’m Superman. >> Did you have a um a favorite Halloween candy that you would like hoard or like really hope you would get? >> So, when I was a kid, I’ll tell you what. >> What’s up, you love nerds? >> I love nerds. I loved loved loved sour candies when I was a kid. Um and that included a lot of different things. Uh Smarties. >> You like Smarties? >> I loved Smarties. The just sour chalk. Sour discs of chalk were my favorite things. There was one candy that stood above all else and I’ve tried them recently as an adult. We do not have them represented here. That’s fine. >> It was chewy sweet tarts. >> Oh, you made those? >> Oh my god, I love >> chewy sweet tarts. >> Kind of suck on them a little bit till they start to give way, get nice and tender and heated from your mouth juices. >> Hated it. >> Chew through the tart. That was a great time. >> So, I think there’s three schools of candy that are available for Halloween candies. You got your chocolate based, you got your like fruity base, and then you got your downright disgusting base. >> Interesting. Where do you put the downright disgusting? >> So things like things like circus peanuts and nec wafers. >> Circus peanuts are my favorite. I almost never got them for Halloween, but um I think my dad would steal them from the 99 cent store that he worked at. >> They have a lot of circus peanuts at the 99 cent store. >> It’s almost the only market left for circus peanuts. >> Yes, literally. Yes. Sometimes they are in the uh what’s it called? like the the sponge aisle >> because they might as well be used as a sponge. Um yeah, so like the things like the like Chico sticks and like >> I love a Cho Stick as well. A stick >> disgusting candies >> 100%. So a Chico stick is the peanut butter halva that is inside of a butter finger. >> Cowattails is another one. Cowattails. >> Love those too. So stick >> it’s just the butterfinger insides but slightly harder in in a stick and rolled in toasted coconut. As somebody who doesn’t really like love chocolate, >> I love all of the meats of the candy bars, but without the chocolate, which is why I love payday. >> I also love a payday, too. >> And when would you get paydays? You’d never get a payday. >> I would get some I would get many paydays. >> You what? >> I would get many paydays. We have different in we have such different like >> we were in the the the apotheiois. We’re in the the zenith of payday culture in America when we were it was paydays and baby Ruths and Baby Ruths are basically just a chocolatecovered payday. Even though now Payday does make a chocolatecovered Payday, which I am interested in trying, just to say that I don’t like it as much. >> I like us in costumes. I feel like we’re we’re um we’re more uh vulnerable and open. >> I think that every day of the year except for Halloween is really when we’re wearing a costume, you know? >> I literally love Halloween so much. It’s truly my favorite holiday. And I think we Oh, hey Nicole. What’s your favorite Josh? Oh, >> I didn’t ask you that. You should ask me. >> Okay. Hey, Nicole, what’s your favorite? >> If I could have a favorite, I would always like the different kinds of Reese. Why are you giggling? All the different kinds. >> You’re delightful. >> All the kinds of Thank you. All the kinds of Reese’s would be really nice, but my favorite always the was always the Reese’s mini peanut butter cups. Um, with the gold lining. That was >> the ones that are kind of taller than they are wide. >> I like them taller than more. I like them more tall than I do wide. Um, >> I think before we even get into any of >> Hold on. Can I tell you my favorites? I have three favorites. >> I’m sorry. I didn’t realize you came prepared. >> Nicole, you have the floor. It is your time. >> I would always like to I love the crackles. You know, you know the Hershey crackles. Hershey crackles. >> Yes, I know them. >> And then also, I love Whoppers. >> I love Whoppers. Whoppers is my favorite. What do you love about Whoppers most? >> I think it’s the malt. >> It’s the malt. >> It’s the malt. >> It’s the malt. >> What can I just ask? Oh, no. You were going to ask first. Go ahead. You’re going to ask a question. >> What do you like about Whoppers most? >> I think they’re so delicious. Like malt teasers and Whoppers? Molted milk balls are undisputed goats. And if you call us old geriatric people, you’re wrong. >> I think we were always on the outside looking in, even as children as fans of Whoppers. You know what I mean? We were always a bit on the fringes of society by like this. I didn’t I didn’t have any peers that also loved Whoppers. It’s not like a generational thing where like Neco wafers were the only candy to exist in the Great Depression. >> No, we we were living in a really really good advanced candy time >> and you and I still chose Whoppers. >> Why? Why are we like this? >> Can we eat them? Can I eat them? I’ve been staring at them. >> Yeah, sure. >> So, this is my official vote for the greatest Halloween candy of all time. >> And I think from a chef’s perspective, Nicole, I think it’s the malt. Malt is such a delightful flavor. It’s got this almost like savory kind of grain like quality that just makes the sweet more palatable. Almost makes the sweet taste sweeter. >> Yeah, I agree. It makes the chocolate more yummy. >> Oh my god. >> We can’t open it. >> We’re very weak. Our tiny childlike hands. Here. You have two. I have one. >> No, I want one only. >> Okay, I want two. >> Oh my god. >> And it’s also really salty. Yeah, that’s what it is. >> Maybe that’s what it is. Maybe we like the salt of it all. >> It’s the salt in the malt. >> The salt of the malt. That’s what they should Whopper rebrand salt of the malt. You’d make millions of dollars. >> Do you think we could get a sponsorship from Whopper? Cuz I feel like I have ideas on how to make >> the Burger King or the candy. >> The candy. >> Not the Burger King. >> I’m going to give that a solid nine. >> It’s a 10 out of 10. This is the best tasting thing I have ever put in my entire mouth. M >> I want to blend that into a milkshake and then add more malt powder and more salt. >> I love One time I made >> Just drink it. I love Whopper. >> One time I made a cake. It was a Whopper cake. It was a molted milk. >> It was a molted milk chocolate cake with molted milk frosting and I put Whoppers all over >> Yeah. Where else do you put whoppers on that cake? Yeah. Oh, come on. Talk to me about the Whopper cake. >> So what? I said I’m the uni bomb. You said you’re the a mouse. >> I’m a mouse. Wait, >> you just look like a Disney adult. >> Minnie. Oh, I’m not a mouse. >> You’re Disney. >> I guess I’m a person who I’m a person named Minnie >> who went to Disney. But this is kind of like a Yassified >> Do you know who Minnie Mouse is? >> Minnie Mouse is either Mickey’s wife or sister. >> Girlfriend. >> Girlfriend. Have they consummated? >> I mean, I don’t know. They’ve been together for like a hundred years now. >> And he hasn’t committed. >> I don’t. Does Minnie know about Mickey’s racist past? >> I’m sure she’s I think she was there from the jump. >> Oh, really? >> Yeah. It’s a real American history x situation. >> She was a bulk. >> The same reason you and I love Whoppers is the same reason we love Fuzza Balk. >> American History X. >> Not because of that. Also, it’s Yeah. What? Take the right message from that movie. Edward Ferlong, incredible role. >> I like the other Edward. I like Edward Norton more. >> I like both Edwards. Um >> Skittles. >> Skittles. What? Okay. On the split between sour fruity candies and chocolatey num num candies, where do you end up? >> Choco Num Num. >> Choco Num Noms. You She likes Choco Num Num candy over here. I see that. >> I love chocolate. Even like crappy chocolate. Apparently Skittles are the worst thing on the planet for you other than like drugs. Did you know that? >> It goes like heroin, crack cocaine. >> This is so psilocybin. >> This is a family show, >> but it’s right after like right after hallucinogens. You got to Skittles. >> Skittles are pretty. They don’t taste good anymore. >> I disagree. I think it’s fantastic. I think the texture of a Skittles is beautiful. I thought this was a giant malformed Skittles >> on the fruity candies. I think you almost have to group them differently. It’s like this is like going out for Mexican food and Thai food. >> Okay. >> You know what I mean? You can’t rank those two dishes together. I have my favorite Mexican dishes. I have my favorite Thai dishes. >> That’s why I said there’s three kinds of of Halloween candies. >> No, you’re correct. You I didn’t mean to pass my idea off as yours. I was merely trying to verify that I agree with what you said. >> The uni bomber is upset with the way that you’re conducting yourself. >> And we know what happens when the uniom is upset. So, where do you rank Skittles against the other sour candies? Was this your favorite sour candy? >> No, this was not my favorite sour candy. I would always go for It’s okay. You can make mistakes here. >> It’s okay. You’re not going to get in trouble here. >> I feel psychologically safe. Thank you. >> This is my favorite podcast we’ve done in like what, 5 years? >> Yeah. 250 episodes. This was the best. Um, Skittles are my favorite. I think they’re too chewy. And I think I like gummy candy. Gummy fruity candy instead of chewy fruity. Like I don’t love like I love Starbursts, but Skittles are too chewy. >> You ever like look at a candy that you’ve known for so long and and you go, “What is it?” >> Is that you? >> Like a Starburst. It is taffy, right? >> We know that to be taffy. We know it’s be tabby, but it’s we don’t think of Starburst. It’s tabby because it’s just a Starburst. It’s a little square with paper on it. And you know >> what is a Skittles? >> It’s just candy. It’s candy coated in more candy. >> Just Yeah, I guess it is. >> It’s candy with a gummy. You know what I mean? It’s not a gummy. It’s not a jelly. It’s not a taffy. Like >> I think it might be a taffy. >> Is it a taffy covered in hard candy? >> It’s an airdried taffy. >> It might be. There’s a strange translucence to the inside of a Skittles. >> Right. I think it’s taffy or some sort of glucose, sugar, fructose base. >> But you know what I mean? Where there’s no dominant noun like a really like a peanut butter cup became its own became its own noun. It became its own like form. You know, a candy bar. >> That is its own thing. A Skittle. And no one’s really tried to copy Skittles, have they? >> I don’t know. I’ve never seen it. All I know is Skittles. Um, peanut M&M’s. What do you give Oh, what do you give Skittles? I give Skittles a five. >> Skittles a six and a half. I think it’s a decent candy. Yeah, I’ve always enjoyed Skittles. Tasting a rainbow. >> Right. Okay. Um, peanut M&M’s. >> Uh, peanut M&M’s I think are really good. I think they’re near the top of the M&M food chain. I’d say pretzel M&M’s and crispy M&M’s. >> Wow. >> Up there. But really, I I do think peanut M&M’s are fantastic. I’m giving it a solid like 9 out of 10. They’re they’re like kind of my old my old standby. >> They’re delicious. But if you have allergist listen, maybe don’t give out peanutbased candies. I love nerds. >> You do? >> Salivary glands on overdrive right now. >> When’s the last time you had nerds? >> Years. They’re so good. >> There’s so many times. Do you remember when I had a meltdown on the podcast? Cuz I haven’t had hot chocolate in like 5 years. >> What happened? >> I had a little meltdown on the podcast cuz I hadn’t had hot chocolate in like 5 years. >> No, I don’t remember. >> I was like, “When’s the last time you would have had hot chocolate as an adult?” And then I started to really grieve my childhood. Los of joy. >> No, I don’t remember this at all. >> Apparently, it stuck to me. >> I’m sorry. That’s so sad. >> Similar with nerds. >> Nerds are great. I love the fun way you can eat them. You can just tilt your head back and take a take a swig of nerds. >> You know what nerds are? They’re the Dorito crumbs of candy. >> Yes. Yes. >> The whole bag is just the crumbs. >> It’s just just crumbs. >> These feel like they fell off of a larger candy. >> Like a Nerds gummy cluster. >> Like a nerd. Well, yeah, but that but Nerds gummy clusters came well after the >> Yes, they did. But I have some right there. And I think we need to determine which is better, a nerds gummy cluster or nerds nude. >> Now my Now my >> open it. >> I’m trying. I have fat fingers and they’re greasy. >> You don’t have fat fingers? >> I don’t, but they’re not very tactile. Oh, I haven’t had a nerd’s gummy cluster in a while. >> This makes me feel like there’s there’s >> in them. Do you also feel that way? A >> little bit. Yeah, I think I just have a stress reaction, you know? I >> I feel like nerds ropes came before Nerds clusters. >> But boy am I. >> You track with anyone. Megie, >> what? Megie, what are you dressed as? >> An BuzzFeed employee. >> You’re dressed as somebody. >> You’re dressed as somebody about to make a why I left BuzzFeed video. >> Yeah, exactly. That was good. >> I’ll tell you what I don’t love about the nerds clusters. >> Check this out. Check this out. We’re doing hardhitting journalism here. I’m sorry. You used to do hard learning journalism and now you have to do this. >> I’m pouring out Yeah. What are you going to do? >> Pouring out the nerds on the table. The average size of a nerd is about three, four times the size of the average nerd on the clusters. >> Can we get a zoom in on this, Maggie? Can we get zoom? Zoom in on this small pile of trash. >> Zoom in. It’s okay. >> Zoom in. Nicole now. Nicole’s taking a picture. Fine. I’m fine. Yeah. Go ahead. >> Do it for scale. Now, if you can see, >> the average size of a nude nerd >> is about three, four times the size of the nerd on the nerds clusters. >> Thing you love about the nerds, the crunch. >> I I like the versatility of a nerd. Like, whenever you crunch into um a swig of nerds, you never really know what size you’re going to get. And maybe, you know, it might get stuck in your teeth. It might get stuck in your mer. You never really know. But with a I’m sorry, I’m going to stop recording now. With a gummy cluster, it’s too uniform. They’re delicious, but they’re too uniform. I’m going to give the nerds gummy clusters a six. I’m going to give the Nerds in the Box. I’m going to give them a 9.8. >> Yeah, I’m going to give the Nerds in a Box a 9.3. Nerds gummy clusters 7.8. Still very good candy. What are we eating now? >> Um, you can choose. >> I want a chocolate. >> Okay, pick whatever chocolate you want. >> No, I want sweet Tarts. >> Okay. I’m sorry. It’s not the sweet tarts you want. >> That’s okay. They also had a sour version of them called shock tarts. >> I like shock tarts. >> Oh, you know what the best candies was? >> What? >> They know. They don’t taste good, but for some reason they were excited. >> Can I guess? I guess they don’t taste good, but they um >> but it was exciting to get them. >> Um Oh, a Warhead. >> No. >> Okay. Um was it like a saltwater taffy? >> No. >> Um I’m going to guess >> it had the texture of sweets. >> Oh. Um I’m going to guess one more time. Um a good and plenty. >> Do you Those don’t have No, no, no, no, no. Bottle caps. >> Oh, I hated bottle caps. >> They were sweet tarts, but they were ta they were tasted like sodas but bad. >> I hated a bottle cap. again. You like gross. You do you like the little nickel lips or whatever? >> Nickel nips. I love the nickel nips. It was wax that you chewed on with a goo in it. >> Gross. >> And then Nicole, when you chewed all the goo out of the wax, you still got to keep the wax in your mouth. >> These are hazardous. >> The flavor of bottle caps where if they were like, “Hey, have you heard of root beer?” And you’re like, “Yeah.” They’re like, “A crap. Well, we tried.” And then handed you a root beer flavored chalk. I’m not a big fan of bottle caps. I’m not a big fan of these. And I’m not a big fan of those nickel nips. >> Nickel nips or the wax lips. The wax lips are always weird. >> My wax lips weren’t good. Here’s the thing. I love chalk. I love eating chalk. >> Yeah. >> You ever have delar roa masapun? >> Yeah, I like masap. >> Peanut chalk. >> I like peanut chalk. I don’t like this. >> You don’t like the sour chalk? >> It went down my my tube the wrong way. >> I think Tums kind of ruined >> I love Tums. I’ve eaten more Tums as an adult than Sweet Tarts. >> Yeah, me too. >> They have really the same texture. >> They do. I agree. I’ve been eating a lot of Tums recently. Let me tell you, I would much rather eat a Tums than a sweet t-art. >> So now eating a sweet tart, I’m kind of just like, “Oh, they’ve made slight improvements to Tums.” >> Literally. Yes. >> We should just be giving out Tums for Halloween. >> How do you feel about uh getting raisins or like floss or like things or apples? I loved it. >> I loved it. >> I love raisins. >> I love raisins, too. Never not like raisins. >> People know when I was a kid, I liked raisins. People were like, “Ew, raisins.” I’m like, “Grow up, kid.” Same. It’s It’s just a lovely little treat. >> How do you feel about milk duds? >> Hate them. >> Oh, don’t eat it. >> Too hard. >> Don’t eat it. >> Too hard. It’s going to destroy my teeth. >> Milk dud’s bad. >> I’m sorry if you can hear me chewing. I’m spitting it out. >> Too hard. Going to rip out a filling. Here’s the thing. I don’t think >> of >> milk duds are worse. Sugar babies. >> Yeah. You like sugar babies? >> Sugar babies are better better milk duds. I’ve never enjoyed a milk dud. People who put put milk duds in their popcorn, I think are full hearty. >> I’d rather put bunch of crunch in my popcorn. >> I’d rather put I then I think that’s a great popcorn choice. >> Thank you. >> You know, >> can you read the joke on the Laffy Taffy for me, please? >> Yes. >> Okay. I’m having so much fun today. I went I went and I got my first uh chili burger from Tom from Tommy. >> Oh, how was it? >> It was good. >> You brought fries back for Analise? >> I did. >> I ate a bite of them. >> Yeah. All right. >> Yeah, you did. >> There’s the chili. Um, where does where’s the joke? >> There’s no joke on your Laffy Taffy. >> Oh, sorry. How does the beach greet you? >> With a wave? >> No, with waves. >> What do you mean? >> The beach the beach greets you with waves is the answer. >> I said with a wave. >> Yeah, that the judge will not accept that. The correct written answer is with waves plural. So, uh, other they give you two now. Okay, I’m ready for translation. >> Why was the gift late to the party? because it wasn’t in the present. >> No, it it was all wrapped up, >> man. >> It’s a double entandra. You see, >> I like mine better. >> I actually Yeah, yours yours really did work. Your I don’t think I would have >> Laffy Taffy called me. I can write jokes for you. How do you like banana? How do you like banana taffy? >> Smells like arco gasoline. >> Let’s Let’s rip it together. >> Banana Laffy Taffy smells exactly like the gasoline at Arco AMPs. Oh, it’s so good. >> I love it. >> Oh my god. Why are we the most disgusting humans on earth? People like I like clickfires. >> Huh? Here’s the thing. >> Here’s the thing. The adult man with banana Laffy Daffy in his mouth says >> and a Minnie Mouse hat. >> I just want new experiences. I want to be titillated. I want to be, you know, I I want to be aroused in certain ways. There’s nothing more arousing than a banana Laffy Taffy. so arousal. >> It’s like there’s pherommones just like rising up to your nose right now. >> It’s almost wrong. >> Mhm. >> You know what I mean? There’s something off about it. >> You know when people you’ve heard the thing that well the reason artificial banana extract doesn’t taste like bananas because the Cavendish banana is the only banana species now and it was actually um modeled after the was it the Michelle Gro banana that doesn’t exist. I’m like, “No, it doesn’t taste like it.” Cuz none of the fruit extracts taste like the fruit. You ever have a watermelon extract? There’s nothing like a watermelon. It’s just bad. >> Yeah. >> What do you rate a banana tappy out of 10? >> Five out of 10. >> I give it an eight just for the intensity. 8.0. >> Now, this is the ones we would always fight over. Twix. It’s a perfect candy. >> Agreed. >> This might be a 10 out of 10 for me. >> Wow. >> Twix to me. >> Wow. >> I’ve always loved Twix as a kid. >> Wow. Like Whoppers were like the fun treat, especially in the movie theater. >> The Whoppers were for me, >> but Twix, I don’t know that you can beat Twix. >> I think it might be number one. >> That’s so damn good. >> Oh, >> I act like I’ve never had it before, but like >> it’s so good, >> man. >> It’s better than a Snickers. >> Significantly, I think because of the crisp. >> The cookie sells it. >> The cookie really sells it cuz what is I feel like there’s there’s a bit of an overreiance on nougat and candy bars sometimes. >> I don’t like nougat. I don’t need nougat. I I love like I don’t think there’s a damn bad candy bar out there. Like someone throws me a Three Musketeers, I’m stoked. >> I’m so I love Three Musketeers. It was just a uniform texture. >> The texture of their nougat. Yeah, it’s great. A Milky Way is great. A 100 Grand bar is great. >> Oh, I love You know who loves 100 grand? >> Trevor’s mom. >> I’ll always remember that fact. >> Interesting. >> Trevor one time told me that my mom loves 100 grand. I said, “Yep, I’m always going to remember that.” I don’t >> I always loved watch. >> Yeah, I don’t like what mallets. >> They’re all kind of the same. They’re all like 80% the same DNA. You know what I mean? >> Yeah. >> Um, but there’s something special to me about Twix because of the crispness of that cookie, the soft texture of the caramel. It’s very simple. I think Twix is probably >> number one. >> Number one more than Whoppers. >> I agree. >> I agree. Well, Reese’s could I I’ve only started enjoying Reese’s now that I’m older. >> Reese’s has that salt. >> I didn’t love it when I was a kid. I think because I I wasn’t mature enough to realize that the peanut butter inside of Reese’s is not meant to taste like normal peanut butter. >> Oh, it’s so good. Oh, it’s so good. Brooks is better. >> What if though you had a cookie bottom with that crumbly salty peanut butter top? >> Yeah, that would be great, but we don’t have that right now. >> We don’t have that. Has Reese’s not made that >> a cookie bottom? They did cookie bottom. They did a PB&J bottom. >> The PB&J bottom I I I thought was I thought was not great. Reese’s do a cookie bottom. The unicom or >> I think they’ve done it with like cookie bits inside, but I want a whole cookie bottom. >> I want a Ritz. No, no, no. I want a Ritz. I want to rit at the bottom. >> Oh my god. Oh my god. We could You know what the crazy thing is, Nicole? >> What? >> You and I are pretty talented cooks. You’d agree? >> Yeah. >> Wouldn’t be too hard to make that ourselves. >> No. >> Are you ever going to do it? >> I don’t really know if I have the capacity or desire to want it. I just want to talk about it. >> Yeah, same. >> I want to see them make it for me. I don’t want to make it myself. >> I kind of want to make it. I kind of want to pick a day. >> Okay. >> And make it and I’ll bring it to you. >> Honestly, if you >> When’s your last day? >> Um, it’s coming up. >> Oh, >> it’s coming up. It’s not for a while. >> It’s around. >> It’s It’s happening. >> Yeah. >> You’re going to I’m going to leave this place for a little bit. It’s going to be sad, but we don’t need to talk about that right now because I’m going to get emotional about it. >> Don’t get emotional about it. Don’t Well, no, you’re allowed to. No. Show your emotions. Don’t >> I’ve cried many times. Cry and try to walk away. It’s clear that come on the show. Um, >> what are we eating? Trolley sour. >> I don’t want to eat these. These are a four. They’re good. Trolley makes good. I don’t need gummy candies in my life right now. >> My tummyy’s starting to get >> so many of these that for some reason I get anxiety looking at them. >> What’s your favorite color combination? It honestly matters. It was always a green and orange. >> You liked the green and orange. I liked the pink and yellow. >> Charlie makes the the best gummies. I believe they’re gummy eggs. >> Oh, my teeth. I’m suffering. >> Yeah, that’s a lot. >> We also have Kit Kat, Snickers, Crunch, and Starburst. Do you want to eat those? >> If you eat the Starburst on the counter, I think it will pull out a tooth. But I will say I did love Starburst in >> I’m going to guess what color is in here. I’m going to guess it’s an orange and a red. Let’s see. Oh, I was so close. >> What do you rate the trolley sour bright crawlers? >> Four. >> They’re a good gummy. >> I like chocolate more than I like gummies. >> Kit Kat. Kit Kat. I love I love the international flavors. The salt flavored Kit Kat from >> Give me a break. >> Give me a break. >> Break you off a piece of that Chrysler car. I’m overheating and I have a sugar high and I have to pee really bad because both of the bathrooms were taken. >> Overheating sugar high. Um, >> overheating sugar. >> You’re funny. >> I think you’re funny. I find you a delightful, charming person. Can I eat this little cigar tip end of your Kit Kat? >> I find you very funny. Um, I love Kit Kats. I’m going to give them a six. >> Kit Kats. I’ll give like an eight point an 8.4. You’re too generous. >> It’s great. And also in >> I love that the in the the the intracostal layers >> Uhhuh. >> are blended Kit Kats. Is that Is that right? >> Yeah. It’s >> like blended old Kit Kats. It’s like how Wendy’s makes their chili with old burgers. >> Exactly. >> Incredible. But it just can’t hold a candle to the Twix. >> No. The Twix is the epitome of Halloween candy. >> I agree. >> It’s it’s it’s what’s who’s a Michael Jordan. It’s the Michael Jordan of Halloween candy. >> It is the epidome of hyperbowl. >> Is it’s the epitome of hyperbole. >> Is that what you’re trying to say? >> Yes. >> Okay. I need popcorn with that. >> You You always mispronounce words. Well, that is just the epidome of hyperbol. >> There’s a joke in there somewhere. >> My favorite Brian Regan joke. >> First sip of water in about 5 hours. Pretty good. >> Nestle Crunch versus Hershey Crackle. Who wins? >> Crackle. >> Can I tell you why? >> Get the out of here. >> Can I tell you why it’s thicker? It’s thicker. It’s taller. >> I like Nestle because they steal water. [Laughter] >> I think Nestle Crunch had a deal with like Bart Simpson when I was growing up. >> I thought that was Butterfinger. >> It was Butterfinger. Butterfinger, right? Who do Crunch? Nestly Crunch had someone though. They do a bunch of like basketball themed things. >> Hey, you’re not you when you’re hungry. >> You’re right. I should grab a Snickers after we’ve binge eating all this candy. Um, Snickers to me was always the standard bearer of candy bars. >> Thank you for silkworming my >> absolutely >> my Snickers. >> Okay. >> I didn’t I didn’t appreciate it as much when I was a kid, but now that I’ve gotten older, I’m like, I understand how Snickers is kind of the perfect candy bar. >> Mhm. Okay. When you have a kid, you’re going to let them eat all their candy. What are you going to do? So, >> what are you going to do? You mean >> as opposed to like kind of like ration it out and >> say like, “Oh, you can have like a bunch in your in your lunch box. like every few days you can have three pieces. What’s What’s your What’s your plan of attack for Halloween candy? >> I’m farther away from thinking about it than you. >> So, I haven’t put any thought into it. >> I’ve been thinking about it for years. >> I know. >> There’s the, you know, seems bad to restrict your kid and what they eat as opposed to like giving him the tools to understand. >> Agreed. I’m going to start cleaning up, Maggie. Okay, I’m we’re still listening. >> But I think >> What’s up? I’m >> but I think like there is just there’s just a genetic component to people who are like very food driven. >> Yeah. >> You know >> I hear I hear that >> no matter how many tools I was given to say like hey moderation good blah blah blah like no dude there was nothing that would stop me >> from just like binging on candy until it stopped tasting good >> until Yeah. Until you would like throw up. >> Yeah. Yeah. and you would vomit like a Skittles and uh >> but like do I really to like restrict the kid or can I just say like hey dude binge on candy it’s a fun time and then you know eat all the candy you want maybe that’s and this and this is why we we live and exist are to enjoy the fun times like this when we can do that you know what I mean >> I’ll say this >> and then back to the grind tomorrow you’re going to be a shot put champion >> I’ll say this I love nerds and I love Twix and Whopper’s going to get gets an honorable mention from me >> any surprises from Um, I think I’m going to be sick. >> I think I go officially official ranking. >> Go ahead. >> Twix one, Whoppers 2, and we know this is a this is a bad take. Nerds three. >> So, we have the same lineup. >> Oh, did you just say that? >> Yes. Are you okay? >> Didn’t even listen to her. Well, it’s the uter bobber and a Disney adult checking out. Hope you guys have a safe Halloween. Fall is the perfect season to invest in yourself. And what better way than learning a new language. Whether you’re planning a trip, craving a new challenge, or just looking to make the most of cozy nights in, Rosetta Stone makes it simple to turn just a few minutes a day into real progress. >> Rosetta Stone has been the trusted leader in language learning for over 30 years. Their immersive, intuitive method helps you naturally absorb and retain your new language with lessons available on desktop or mobile so you can learn anytime, anywhere. >> I love how approachable the lessons are. Bite-size, easy to follow, and their true accent speech recognition gives realtime feedback that actually helps me sound more natural. It feels like having a personal language coach right there with me. >> And with 25 languages to choose from, from Spanish and French to Japanese and beyond, you’ll find the one that fits your goals. So don’t wait. Unlock your language learning potential now. >> A hot dog is a sandwich. Listeners can grab Rosetta Stone’s lifetime membership for 50% off. That’s unlimited access to 25 language courses for life. Visit rosettasone.com/hotog to get started and claim your 50% off today. >> Don’t miss out. Go to rosettastone.com/hotog and start learning today. >> Hey everybody. Now we’re going to see what you all had to say. And that’s why we do a segment that we like to call >> opinion. >> Hot dog is a sandwich. [Music] >> Let’s hear that first hot dog. Meg. >> Come on, hot doggers. >> Hi. Uh my name is Vic and I am a transmasculine person who’s married to a trans woman. I just uh watched your episode with Amanda Lean Kanto about pregnancy cravings. You were talking about trans women craving pickles and what do trans men crave? Well, first of all, my wife and I both love pickles are very into that. Uh, but as a transmasculine person, um, when I am taking testosterone, I crave red meat and it’s not something that I crave all the time outside of like when I’m not on my hormones. >> It’s not always a thing. But when I’m when I decide to be on testosterone, it’s always like I need steak, I need burgers, I need beef constantly. So interesting. So >> you asked, that’s just what I think. >> Love the pod. I >> That’s the most alpha ever. >> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. When I have more on I want more meat. >> That makes a lot of sense. >> Um that is actually really cool. And we actually got a fair amount of comments uh from >> Yes, I saw those >> trans women that were talking about the link to the use of is it spironolactone? >> Spironolactone. >> Spirinolactone. >> Uhhuh. It um it uh gets it takes away, I guess, or manages your testosterone or androgen levels. I was on spiralactone for a while. >> You’re on spirolactone? >> Yeah. >> Oh, interesting. >> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. >> Did it make you crave pickles? >> No. >> Oh, funny. >> And did it make me crave pickles and it didn’t make me want anything with a lot of sodium or I mean I’ I eat a pickle a day naturally. I’ve always been a pickle fan since before spolactone. >> When you said I eat a pickle a day naturally, you said it as if it’s like, well, the iguana’s natural prey tends to be the common house fly. >> Stop. I eat I eat a pickle every day for probiotic reasons and it makes me feel good but I but I haven’t linked it to my spirol my former spinolactone usage. Pickles are a part of your natural habitat as you see wandering outside a door. >> Um yeah so I don’t know when I was on spirolactone I didn’t notice my diet change necessarily. Um but I do like pickles so I don’t know. >> Listen I like pickles and I do actually no I feel like I don’t like red meat as much. Do you think wait here red meat as a naturally low tea male >> Mhm. >> as your classic beta cuck soy boy over here. >> Yeah. The beta is >> um the beta is no like I have actually gotten my testosterone levels checked and I know there’s a lot of different factors that go in. >> I didn’t do it for any reason. My doctor definitely thought that I watched too much. Joe Rogan was going to ask her to be on supplemental tea, but I was really just curious. Um it was like in like the low 300s, which is like in the normal range. >> Are you in the normal spectrum of testosterone? I’m in the normal spectrum, but it’s like >> you know on the lower end of that spectrum. >> Okay. >> Um >> and I don’t think I exhibit a lot of like traditional masculine tendencies in certain ways. I don’t crave red meat almost ever. >> Okay. >> All I want to eat are delicious chickpea curries and chutneys. >> Yeah. >> But I wonder if there could be a link to like uh like you know not just taking supplemental testosterone but just literally people with higher tea levels craving red meat. >> Well, I have higher testosterone levels and I love red meat. You like you love more red meat than I do. >> I do. >> Wow. >> I do. >> Sometimes I think that our brains are all kind of just computers and predestined to be at the whims of our hormonal desires and that free will doesn’t exist and we’re all passengers on this spaceship earth just careening wherever it goes. >> We’re on the firefly. Megie, >> consciousness is an illusion. >> Hi Josh. Hi Nicole. This is Amy from the Philly area. Go B. >> My casserole opinion is that what? Simply eating the pizza crust after finishing your pizza is boring and you should dip it in soda instead. It’s like a little dessert after your pizza. >> My soda of choice is fruit beer. You should try it. >> Okay. >> Uh should I? >> Hear me out. >> I feel like this is just a trick. Like this is a Joey Chestnut trick. >> Yeah. Just to get it down. faster. I like it. >> I was eating a plain hot dog the other day on camera. >> No bun. >> No, sorry. It was a hot dog in a bun with no condiments and there was just a glass of water in front of me and I just really >> wanted to dunk it just to moisten it. >> I get it. Yeah, >> I agree with you on viewing your pizza crust as an opportunity. I think that’s incredibly smart. However, what you’ve done with that opportunity is where I would maybe take issue with or at least suggest some alternatives. >> I’m going to dip it in soda water. >> Plain soda water. plain >> as opposed to root beer. I I would much take root beer over the plain soda water. >> Okay. >> What I think you should do, you get some ice cream. >> You dip it in the root beer. You let that ice cream get kind of melty. You dip in the root beer to soak it almost like the way that you would soak a lady finger in espresso or liquid for >> soak that in the root beer. Kind of open it up and then fill that with ice cream. You got a nice little like savory root beer float kind of ice cream sandwich. >> Sounds terrible. Never doing that. >> Or you just dip it in ranch. I would just rather dip it in ranch. >> I love root beer though. That was a great opinion. >> I love root beer too, but I’m not going to do that. >> Weird opinion, but so I used to stay with my buddy back in the day when I was younger and his ma used to make this like weird deli meat kind of savory dish thing. So what she did is she had bologoney >> and then they put peanut butter in it and rolled it up. Or you just fry the baloney and then put peanut butter and roll it up. I always thought this was disgusting. Sounded nasty. Tried it. Fell in love with it. Now it’s a pre-workout snack. Uh, and yeah, no one else will try it for me. But give it a try. Sounds terrible. Tastes amazing. Love you guys. Keep feeling it. Love you, too. >> Let me tell you, man. There is some precedent for this. Looks like there’s a few recipes on the web about it. So, you’re not alone. What if I told you that we did a struggle meals episode >> on Mythical Kitchen’s YouTube channel where we cooked your favorite struggle meals and one of them was a grilled baloney and peanut butter sandwich. >> Okay. How was it? >> I really loved it. What it really needed though, I thought was jelly. I thought a little bit of jelly in there would be really nice. >> Like grape jelly. >> Almost like a like a like a PB&J with bacon in it, but like the baloney was kind of more pleasant than bacon cuz it didn’t have that kind of like obstructive chew, >> right? You know, the baloney almost has the same texture as peanut butter. >> I I can see that, you know, >> but when you fry it, doesn’t change a little bit. >> A little bit, but then it just kind of gets like a little bit kind of caramelized and hot. Starts to melt the peanut butter. I was actually really surprised at how good it was. We didn’t have jelly and so Tony handed me a bottle of strawberry syrup. >> Oh my god. I love hisuity. >> Yeah, that was not good though. But you were saying >> I Nothing. >> All right. [Laughter] So, oh, hi. My name’s Jen, by the way. So, I just >> I got these Nature Valley chewy granola bars and they were s’mores and they look really, really good. And I’ve never bought the chewy ones, but it seems like a sliver of granola bar in a wrapper. And I think it would be more cost effective and better if they just sold granola bars in a sheet. >> Mhm. And then you could cut out how much granola bar you wanted because this seems like a lot of plastic for very little granola bar. But I feel like this is something Josh already does. >> Hear me out. >> I used to. >> Hear me out. Why don’t you hear me out? You’re going to make your own granola bars and you’re going to do that and you’re not But can’t you buy a big Am I making it up that you can buy a big granola bar somewhere? >> I’m sure there’s like a novelty somewhere fell off. >> Um you can buy like giant Snickers bars. They have like duty-free shops. Um, I just love the idea of walking into like a a grocery store and just seeing this giant egis, this giant shield of granola bar that you can just chuck in your cart. >> Um, I used to do this with protein bars. I would make my own protein bars and I would make them giant slab. No, no, sorry. Not not the scrambled egg protein bars. I would actually make them with like whey protein, almond flour. >> Oh, yum. >> It’s just so It’s so much work and it’s so annoying and it’s just not even like >> it’s not worth it. not worth it. >> I used to do that. I used to just put them in giant, you know, uh, hotel pans. Um, and then you just, you know, take like a paint chipper and kind of just carve off a little nug. I love that idea, though. You ever go into a Mexican grocery store and they have the chicharon >> that are just in a giant sheet? >> Yes. >> And they’ll just put it in a bag and sell it to you. >> That’s what she wants with granola bars. And I think she should have that. >> Just make your own. If you have the time, energy, money, uh, vibe, just do it. >> I think you had a great idea. Also, I I find the Nature Valley chewy granola bars to be really delicious. >> I love chewy bars, >> the sweet and salty nut one from Nature Valley. >> Oh my god, that little peanut butter bottom >> that could challenge >> peanut butter bottom >> for the best Halloween candy. >> Oh my gosh, it tastes like a payday. >> The tastes like >> granola bars are just candy bars. We got to understand this. We got to understand this. >> The grain and granola is grain. That’s what the Twix cookies made of granola. It’s made of grain. >> Granola. >> Granola. >> Granola. I’ve gone insane. I’ve had so much sugar coursing through my body. Next, Maggie. Next. >> Hi. Um, my name is Percy and I’m from Kansas City, Kansas. Um, and I was making butter chicken earlier. It’s a recipe I’ve made a lot, but it was just like from the internet or something. Um, and I didn’t have any tomato paste, which is called in the recipe. So, I just used Campbell’s condensed tomato soup. And I figured like there’s probably some sort of cream, sugar, salt, tomatoes. So I figured it would work. But like I’m not sure if that was like sacrilegious. No. Nothing around here sacriiggious. You know if you listen you what you did, you know what you did? You did the Instacart man method. Whenever a man is my Instacart driver, you know what he does? He substitutes it with something I wouldn’t consider. But I mean, am I glad it’s in my pantry? Yes. It’s like, “Oh, I really want to buy I really want like a aloe vera drink. There’s no aloe vera drinks.” He goes, “Aloe Vera soap.” I’m like, “You know what? Screw it. Sure.” Um, so you just did the Insta Instacart man method of tomato paste substitution. It still worked and it’s still fine, but it’s not the best. It’s not the best. Josh, >> do people not know that the original recipe for chicken tikka masala was literally made with a can of condensed? >> I did not know that. >> Yeah, dude. It’s straight up like uh back Yeah, I I just double checked it. Um >> uh Yeah. What is his name? It’s a It’s a Pakistani Scottish chef at a restaurant called Shish Mahal. Yeah, literally chicken tikka masala was just invented with cans of condensed soup. And then >> those recipes were rewritten to be like, “Okay, but what if we made this >> fresh?” Um, so yeah, you sort of unknowingly made not necessarily butter chicken or marin machany, but chicken tikka masala the authentic way. Good for you. You are a bastion of culture and you should be rewarded. >> Congratulations. Sorry for calling you an Instacart man. >> What is the weirdest Instacart substitution you’ve ever gotten? >> I just gave it to you. >> I missed it. >> Okay, well then I’m not going to say >> I sometimes have listening issues. >> It’s fine. You’re just going to miss out on my really great stories. Rats. I love good stories. >> You’re a mouse, not a rat. >> Yeah. All right. >> Is that it, Megie? >> Yeah. >> It’s a rumor. Okay. The chicken t masala. It’s a It’s a It’s not a rumor. The guy who claims to have invented it claims he used soup, but nobody really knows who invented nothing. It’s like the French dip debate. >> What? Or Oh, sorry. Do we stop the podcast now? >> End the comments. >> I think the hat made me go a little insane this episode. I think the hat made me go a little crazy. >> Really? I’ve never felt more like my true self. >> Yeah, that makes sense, man. Well, hey, thank you so much for stopping by. A hot dog is a sandwich be more normal next time. We got a Oh god, Uni Bomber found his next target. Uh we’ll be back around town next week. >> I’m going to Orlando. >> Next week, Wednesdays is where we do podcasts, I guess. Uh Sundays are also >> people are going to think we are so >> we’re available on stuff on think we’re tooted and zooted. We’re certainly not. I’ve never done pod at work. Um, I don’t even I don’t even do pod anymore cuz I just get scared. >> If you want to be featured in a This is a family focused pod. >> It’s like legal everywhere now. It’s legal everywhere. >> Okay, fine. But you know, if there’s a little seven-year-old kid that says, “My mom doesn’t let me listen to the podcast anymore cuz you guys talked about marijuana.” Then that’s on you. That’s on you, Josh. >> Podcast reviews anymore. No one does that anymore. >> If you want to be featured on Opinions Castro, hit us up at 833 podcast. The number again because I misspoke is 833 DogPod one. >> Go to 833 Dog. Hot dog one. You look exactly like Justin Bieber. I’ll see youall next time. Bye. Good Mythical Evening is blasting off on October 23rd at 1000 p.m. Eastern, 700 p.m. Pacific. So get your tickets now at good mythicaleing.com.