ramble [Music] welcome to best friends back all right the show where two high school best friends try the best friend thing again i’m nakinomaefed and i’m stevie wynn levine and we are doing something completely different something that’s gonna rock your socks something that is going to change your life that was like the um like a cool intro to a pharmaceutical drug for like period cramps you know what i mean yes did you recently audition for something like that it’s gonna change your life i’ve started uh turning down pharmaceutical auditions oh excuse me because i’m like who knows what this drug is gonna do side effects may include growing an extra uterus but that’s okay take our drug and it’ll plug up both you right you’d arrive utilized the universe speaking of uteri yeah speaking of uteri yeah you still got yours yes thank you so much for asking all right these days who knows who knows what to take who’s taking what you sound like a misinformed mom how was your week you you were abroad you were in italy and last week you went to tribeca why are you so cool and i’m so not cool you are cool you just are in la which is like you don’t have to overcompensate okay okay i’m in l.a with my uterus just me and my uterus hanging back here but you are in italy uh presumably with your uterus yeah i went there i uh have come back with it intact we were there for a wedding and it was glorious it was gorgeous oh yeah we’re gonna we’re not gonna be happy for me we’re gonna just be a little bit spiteful of the fact that i went well i just i realized when you said your uterus was intact like my mind went back into a spiral spiraling hole of depression and i’m trying to like get away from that for this interaction and for the sake of our friends so yes a beautiful wedding in italy tell me how that went it was great zach’s uh college italian college roommate was getting married in tuscany in a drum roll please a castle a real life castle i thought so they’re rich rich they have good taste is all i can say okay that’s a very pc answer because um we show up it’s a stunning just a stunning like scene was there like a circle drive on at the castle like like in like bridgerton situation where you like pull up in like a nice car and like there’s weights great question so maybe this was like a poor castle because there was not one of those it was up it was up on a hill which meant that you got a lot of great wind it was like you got a lot of great wind it was 95 degrees that day oh damn and everybody’s on a like a shuttle bus up to this place dying okay thinking it’s definitely a poor castle there’s a shuttle bus and nice winds right we did not have a horse-drawn carriage take us to this castle um and gorgeous i mean just all the things you think the castle would be a poor castle would be this was yeah and then i go i go to the bathroom and come to realize that this is not the main castle for the family that owned it for centuries not the bride and groom but the family that owned it it was their hunting castle what’s in the bathroom yeah what how do you want to notify it was a walk to the bathroom there were dead animals everywhere rifles spears swords what do you call what do you call dead animals trophies taxidermy like the taxidermy stuff all around so that turned my stomach a little bit but uh other than that fantastic wedding and then we stayed a few extra days in florence it was so hot i actually got heat exhaustion no yeah that’s not good that’s like actually bad you might need a pharmaceutical for that but you were okay you just hydrated hydrated for a few days i thought i may have had may have contracted covid then i realized no these are just symptoms of heat exhaustion so yeah you have to hire draper for a few days that was basically like out of commission this is not a story i that i i guess i’m starting because the words are coming out of my mouth i remember the one time that i got heat exhaustion it was we had um we used to have summer camp for soccer when i did like you know classic travel soccer and the summer camps were like really difficult and it was like all day every day heat of north carolina summer oh my completely inappropriate like i don’t think they make kids do these camps in the same way because it’s like actually you could just freaking die in the middle of the field and i got heated exhaustion and i just remember i had to get into like an ice bath and like couldn’t keep gatorade down and like oh it was uh was it coming up come out of the top or the bottom it was coming out of the top oh i’ve had the only coming out of the top and bottom situation i’ve ever had in my life is is when i got food poisoning my god like it’s like where do you even go i know it’s like oh my god that scene from bridesmaids you know the one i’m talking about where everyone’s shooting their bands yes i love how everything revolves around weddings and you’re in you’re so true well speaking of what comes out of uh bottoms that’s i got a preview of it not i mean logan’s like what did you do like no no this is a transition into a meaningless top 10 conversation oh although actually an in not a duty way uh so okay so at the end of the episode we’ll go into like our awkward social moments of the week but as you know i have many and so i’ll just preview because last week it was about uh my boob coming out can’t remember which one right one sure i didn’t want to double up in the awkward moment segment on body parts coming out but i did accidentally have a body part come out this weekend because i dove into a pool you got into water yeah i’m impressed you can see right through okay because i’m awkward i wear boy shorts on the bottom when i go swimming which is something i think that we’ve talked about and i just like you know sometimes when girls dive into a pool and you have a bikini on like there’s like a whole top and bottom might come off like situation to be aware of but usually with board shorts i’ve never i’ve never really had that issue but right i realized that board shorts i was wearing yesterday were these old american apparel that have like a velcro fly yeah situation now over time apparently velcro gets weaker and weaker it deteriorates and this is like a pool party situation this was not a um you know small friend group and uh yeah and so despite the tie like the entire fly area just butterflied open into um it was just out there it was just out there and i don’t know i don’t know if anyone saw it i wasn’t gonna ask your advice because like what do you do you just zip up your fly i mean you velcro up your fly anyway so my web watch came out at the pool um but uh oh oh here’s the segway that was embarrassing for me and today we are talking about we’re going to make the definitive list of the top 10 most embarrassing things that tsa could catch on you in your bag as you’re going through security now did you have any security issues on the way to italy not this time oh not this time i’ve had some security issues in the past but i will say those have decreased with time as you’ve learned as i’ve learned what to check what to leave at home and what to put in my husband’s bag instead nice this list came to mind for me recently because i was wearing oh my god i mean everyone knows i’m such a big lesbian but here i am talking about my board shorts and now i’m about to say i was wearing cargo pants and i wore cargo bands into tsa and i was like cargo pants they’re so great you could put stuff in the pocket uh but i put um i had a tampon in my cargo pant pocket and i forgot that it was in there but i emptied the rest of my pockets and put everything through the the belt that goes through and it was a tsa woman on the other side of the metal detector and she was like do you have anything in your pockets and i was like i have a tampon in my pocket and she was like i’m gonna need you to take it out and i was like okay and so i had to take the tampon out of my pocket and hold it out to her uh in front of everyone and it was such a like middle school feeling it was like like a super tampon yeah which makes it even worse yeah and so it was like okay if i’m oh actually no it was a regular tampon it was a regular day oh anyway nice uh if i’m embarrassed by taking this tampon out of my cargo pants which i should have already been embarrassed by the cargo pants how many other things could you bring through security oh totally what are the most embarrassing what are these what are them [Laughter] what are they you asked you asked your your followers um yeah on twitter and oh boy oh boy did they show out oh my god the creativity yeah so um basically what we did is we’ve compiled a list of suggestions from y’all and uh we’re gonna sit here and we’re gonna actually physically physically sure physically emotionally and mentally rank these things and we’re gonna land on what the most embarrassing thing is to bring through security and i have a feeling it is not a tampon based on a little bit of a preview of what some people have suggested people started answering sex toy sex toy and i was like that is too general i need to know what kind of sex toys we’re talking about here and and i and and there’s some specific answers uh that was received uh as well as some photos uh that were that were people sent you photos yes yes uh but no i think here’s the thing we’re making i think that there’s consistency and embarrassment in this list yeah this says obvious answer is marital aid which is a phrase i have never heard in my entire life i’d like to thank at banana the banana patch for that because i thought that was a really classy way to say something sex toy is it did you know that already i didn’t but i felt it was pretty descriptive is it that seems like real here’s what’s no this is it says obvious answer i think sex toy is the most obvious answer right how many times yeah yeah you’re using context clues i just don’t like the the actual the actual phrase marital aid i have never in my life heard i heard that well it does sound very polite like it sounds like something like a grandmother would say if forced to you know but i just thought it was really interesting a marital aid i really loved what naf and jd said which was donuts donut holes and glue but what would you do with donuts donut holes and glue you would take you would just glue the donut holes into the donuts i think it’s just a nice reminder that donut holes are the most nonsensical name for donut holes right because a hole is an empty empty thing and a doughnut hole so well that’s a good point but that is not an embarrassing thing it’s not embarrassing but it just helped me think through something that’s pretty important okay so you’re stuck on the donut holes i’m stuck on the marital aid uh but neither one of these things i think moves into the actual defense no list i guess we should read them out loud i i’ll i’ll quickly read them out loud and then if something deserves to be on our list i’m going to shout out the screen name and we can like move it over so we have 12 inch dragon shaped butt plug that is i’m looking at my laptop which is is 13. and that is a big butt plug and the dragon shaped nature of it well that’s just it physically impossible i just don’t believe is there a curvature yeah there’s a structure and there there would be a foot long a foot long foot long penetration up to the into the butthole well actually and now we’re just evaluating if these sex toys are usable which is not what we’re trying to do but okay we’ll come we’ll come back to that one small box of condoms that expired four years ago a costco-sized soap hand pump full of lube well that i just say you brought it on to yourself you can’t bring over 3.5 ounces on yeah so yeah so nope laptop with a wallpaper that is a tastefully lewd photo of you and your lover are they looking at are they opening laptops nowadays is that something that’s happening i’m gonna say that they’re thinking that this is the like the sleeve you put over your laptop don’t try and help people don’t try and help people explain so it just doesn’t make any sense otherwise all right this next one is pretty pretty nasty oh probably something like a used pad wrapped in toilet paper because the coffee shop you went to before the flight didn’t have a trash can stall for some goddamn reason that is from at no noitra yeah this seems plausible to me this seems like something this is like a bad thing that like women have to deal with yeah but it’s like an awkward moment and they handled it incorrectly yes yes this situation no no no noitra my suggestion to you is if you’re in this situation there’s no toilet there’s no like a trash can you plug that you plug that toilet right up you leave that pad with a pad i’m sorry no do not listen to that advice if you’re a bathroom and you don’t have a trap if you’re a bathroom if you’re an establishment that doesn’t have a trash can and a bathroom aren’t you just asking for it yeah but no but why would you plug up the toilet you would just wrap it up in a bunch of [ ] and then you would put it in the corner like shunned into the corner like yeah on the floor on the floor yeah yes yeah okay okay yeah i give it to you wash the pad in the toilet this is too nice this person uses goddamn in their in their tweet and yet they did something too nice to the coffee shop bathroom arguably and they’ve put themselves in a horrible situation but but that’s not the question the question is if you were a tsa agent and you opened up someone’s bag and that’s what was in it wouldn’t be embarrassing my argument for not putting it on the list even though it seems like realistic like yes it would be embarrassing but it would also be so [ ] disgusting to encounter that the disgustingness i think cancels out the embarrassment and so therefore if we were making a top 10 list of disgusting things i’d put it on okay but top 10 embarrassing things i don’t know though it’s also it’s it’s a conversation you know i feel like we could come back to it i agree and it’s maybe on another list even there’s disgusting but there’s also like unhealthy top 10 most unhealthy things because again like [ ] on the super like nice responsible person who didn’t want to like burden anyone with their i appreciate it but when you go into the details of this thing again why was it flagged things that are wrapped are not flagged like a a cotton thing it’s over 3.5 oh so you’re saying you’re saying that they worried about that yeah ew i didn’t even think about that first thing i thought about okay well we can keep going we keep going at no neutral we will save this response for another list another episode okay let’s keep it going oh knife metal wire and a pair of snips for bonsai tree that’s embarrassing in a different way you know check it check it extremely complex bdsm equipment slash chastity belts penis cages belts with integrated anal blocks with unique x-ray silhouettes that sounds like a description of like an amazon shopping like listing when they’re trying to like list all the keywords to something a plastic bag containing a copy of florida georgia line’s latest album a travel size bottle of lube i mean at least it’s travel size you know travel size you’re following the rules an nra membership card [ ] okay and a ball gag listen let me say like all these things paint a picture of someone that i think actually exists who has a florida georgia lion album an nra membership a ball gag and a bottle of lube like your parents neighbors or something yes yes yes very specifically uh who was that that was at sea stone crop 13. that’s pretty good um a stool sample i i would say yes that is a embarrassing thing i’ve collected many a stool sample why since having since having a dog [Laughter] you know those like those um the the companies that do the mail away stool samples do you see this i see those commercials all the time are they coming after me you poop into uh i don’t i meant a plastic bag a plastic container is this just me logan’s done many of these you put in a box you have to like you have to like poop into a tray into a tray how big is that truck well yeah what’s the size like a laptop in terms of the uh dragon dragon dildo that’s a foot long uh it’s like half the size of the dildo that is a small tray why and then they give you this little plastic rake a little fork it’s like a spork it’s like a spork that kind of sounds funny and you have to you have to grab samples from from every side of the of the sample wow they make you do i they make you do the work you should be able to just send the whole thing and then you have to stuff it into a prescription bottle oh my gosh it’s like ah and put it in your freezer honestly it’s not in the fridge and then and then you ship it off are they paying you why does it have to go in the freezer i have if you’re shipping it off does the box have like ice packs in it yes it does none of this is in the commercial really and you only have a prescription bottle to fit it all in i think this is a viable candidate from at ftp 1212. yes thank you thank you would be weird and embarrassing maybe okay next one we have is nothing like your bag is completely empty and you’re still lugging it through the airport okay i’m gonna say at racquetball 38 i actually i think you’re on to something here what i think it’s really embarrassing and real creepy if you’ve put your luggage in and there is nothing in it no because you could be going somewhere and you want to fill your luggage with souvenirs or something else from the destination okay so you’re planning a trip and you’re not taking one thing with you not a no brush without a deodorant or antiperspirant okay yeah yeah i guess in my mind you had a rolling bag and you had a book bag and the book bag had stuff in it and the rolling bag did it look who’s helping answers yeah but then like because the other thing is that you have to have a moment of discovery and like in my mind if someone were to open a bag and be like there’s nothing in here it wouldn’t be embarrassing you know you wouldn’t be like oh my god i’m so embarrassed that you just said there was nothing in my suitcase whereas if you opened the suitcase and you were like is this a stool sample then you’d be like oh god please keep your voice down okay well what do you think about this what do you think about somebody going through gsa and not having a single piece of luggage uh like pilot you know another tsa member uh someone who travels a lot and i’m talking about a passenger like if a passenger is walking through tsa with nothing on them but yeah id businessman specifically a man why are we helping these men [Laughter] i think there’s something embarrassing there if you’re stopped and they are accusing you of something embarrassing like like you didn’t bring anything freak you’re a freak okay you’re violent we’ll add that to the list do you want to consider uh you want to argue about this later and bring over nothing yeah okay we’ll bring nothing over let’s bring you nothing over okay concerning amount of almonds suitcase full of almonds if they’re loose if they’re loose nuts it’s it’s weird [Laughter] that’s weird it is weird is it embarrassing though you made the choice to bring loose nuts in your bag and then you’re gonna be embarrassed when someone opens your bag and says why you got all these nuts you can’t use that line of reasoning oh i can’t and let me if you want to use that line of reasoning put it against everything else that’s on this list which is like everyone is making the choice yeah yeah to bring these things and you bury the stool sample which is in the prescription bottle is buried it’s like wrapped in enclosed you know even the dirty dirty pad is wrapped and and tucked away the almonds you can’t hide the almonds the almonds are just out and about like that’s a that’s a it’s a bold almond choice it’s a bold almond and i don’t mean i’ll give it to you the wrap wrapped items wrapped items are embarrassing yeah fine yes okay that is a really good that is a good point by nature of wrapping you are trying to hide them and therefore they are more embarrassing yeah so any of these other marital aids that we see on this list i’m telling you if you’re not wrapped or hidden i don’t think you’re embarrassing all right bunch of cans of tuna with a can opener practical i think it’s practical yeah maybe they’re traveling to a place where they don’t like the food okay oh come on come on underwear with skid marks with a z z skid marks yeah that would be really embarrassing yes it is it’s a contender only because it’s accurate you know yeah a full jar of strawberry jam that i told them i had just in case i would be proud of that i would not be embarrassed about that i one thing that has gotten me uh checked with tsa now multiple times is someone doesn’t learn a lesson well so when i go home they just they have better grits in north carolina and in virginia than they do anywhere else like just like rough like stone ground corn grits and so my mom always has like a big bag of grits that i put onto my carry-on yeah gets flagged by tsa every time and so twice or three times now i’ve had to show them my grits which sounds like slang for something cool but like no just like my grip but they let you take it in but they let me they let me bring home the grits yeah and two different brands of grits might i add yeah yeah yeah do you like your grits cheesy i like cheesy grits oh so you like salty grits you like you like sweet grits no i was so excited that we were on the same page because i do not like sweets sweet crits are wrong and i’m gonna i’m gonna go out on them i’m gonna say it and if you’re listening to me right now and you like sweet grits you can go [ ] yourself oh my gosh you’re gonna get so much hate meal uh but no rock that strawberry jam and rock those grits exactly one time my sister got stopped by tsa because she had a subway sandwich stuffed into her bag that had bent into a u-shape i don’t know what the guy thought it was but he looked so relieved when he pulled it out that’s a footlong subway that reminds me of the last 12-inch thing that we were talking about i think that’s why he was relieved because he thought it was a dildo we would probably went after each other in the line all right one time i bought some seasoning in texas called quotes good [ ] and then tsa had to test that good [ ] to see if it was drugs so it was funny and embarrassing as far as sex toys i don’t find it too embarrassing i’m with you wait you’re with them i don’t find it embarrassing i don’t find it embarrassing because why don’t you state this right off the top this is a this is a stance you’re taking well i thought we would get to the last the end of the end of the show we’d talk about the options that we’ve had and then i would put kind of your foot down down are you saying no no sex toys on the whole list nope i think none of them are embarrassing because if you’re putting it in your butt if you’re putting it in your carry-on then you know it’s gonna go through a security thing and like it’s just it’s just not embarrassing now this is this is coming from a woman who wouldn’t put anything like that in a carry-on right but i just don’t i don’t think sex toys are an embarrassing thing i strongly disagree again put it against my test they open the bag they say you got a lot of almonds in here or they say you have a 12 inch dragon butt plug okay so you think you think the tsa agent has opened this thing and that’s the first time they’re seeing a sex toy no so they’re going to ask what is this i think they know what it is it’s not embarrassing for the ta agent it’s embarrassing for the person bringing it through okay so in this i’m imagining the conversation okay go ahead who do you want to play i’ll play the tsa agent i’ll start okay i think i’m gonna have to pull inside your bag because i’m seeing something that looks a little dangerous no problem what is this sir sir is this a 12 inch dragon shaped plug oh i am so glad you asked are you also an owner of a 12 inch dragon shaped butt plug is that how you know what this is as you look at it no but i have seen three in the past week come through yeah there’s a convention i don’t know what’s even happening anymore anyway let’s go back to the list who knows maybe the more i see the i also think the more we read the less embarrassing it gets because we be yes just getting desensitized whatever i’m yeah there’s at least one spot goes to a sex toy we just have to determine which one which one yeah oh divorce papers that’s just sad that’s just like a sad emotional time yeah 826 pictures of rhett and link i think i will say a ton of printed out photos of anyone is a little bit creepy that’s a little embarrass you’re a scrapbook artist oh okay read this one flew to montana last summer with my dad’s ashes and tsa straight up told me they were concerned that they could be cocaine like that would have been so much cocaine guys this is sad and not embarrassing it’s embarra this is embarrassing for the tsa people poor thing at details screen names are very difficult for me for some reason i love this one i do like this story i just don’t know if it’s embarrassing this story is a good story this reminds me of my grace this reminds me of your regrets it also reminds me of a tsa issue i’ve had that concerns my grandmother so my grandma may her soul rest in peace used to used to uh stuff things into my bag without me knowing it as like little sweets you know she would put little things uh all the time and one time she stuffed something that’s called in farsites cepheid ub which translates to white water um there are these like small white pumice stones okay that are for exfoliating your skin okay my grandma’s stowed some of these in my carry-on tsa stops me they see these like a bag of small little white rocks and they open it and it’s embarrassing because i don’t know why they’re opening my bag yeah and then they pull something out and i didn’t know it was there so that’s the second readings and it’s embarrassing they’re like what are these so i have to look at them look through them and realize oh it’s siffy dub and i’m like okay so it’s iranian and then they’re like what so red flag number two i’m like oh it’s this thing that you use to like exfoliate your skin i’m going through this whole skincare regimen with them and there’s when was this about oh this had to have been like seven years ago at least okay you’re you’re a full-on adult but you i’m still like someone put something in my bag that i don’t know is there and that’s freaky exactly so so many layers of like weird things happen to get me to that place and they let me eventually take it but it was embarrassing because i didn’t know exactly what was going on and then i knew that they were super uncomfortable with the fact that this was a foreign object god so thanks a lot grant exfoliate and then you shove them up your butt uh a labeled remote for a vibrator just the remote that’s different it’s different that’s different a binder where i’ve scrolled my first name combined with the exact tsa agent’s last name all over it and little hearts everywhere such a cute entry from tj chambers who is the showrunner of inside eats with rhett and link on food network thank you tj for chiming in uh but this person says picture of the tsa agent at m roberts164 and i do feel as if that would be embarrassing that’s embarrassing yeah we can it’s like your crush your crush has has figured you out nicole mythical kitchen nicole said a full unopened water bottle and here’s the thing i completely agree with this entry because it’s a different kind of embarrassment it’s an embarrassment of like negligence you should have no yes it’s like you you have had multiple signs you like had to sign something before getting your ticket saying that you weren’t gonna bring a water bottle there’s signs going up to the security saying no water bottles there’s like trash cans for your water bottles and then they find a full water bottle that’s embarrassing get your act together the bag of all the hair you’ve collected over the years by plucking them off strangers shoulders like oh you got a hair there i got you covered pal this is from socks you used as emergency toilet paper would be pretty bad i assume from wet eyes tops this is another person without a trash can that’s like the the pad uh situation okay went on a school charity trip once after my brother used the same suitcase for his grad trip i arrived at the place with over 40 condoms in my suitcase i was 12 and the trip was to help build an orphanage uh that’s incredible what is this screen name please say it i can’t even venture to say what that screen name is at uh kalu my dear hood this is embarrassing this is truly embarrassing and the most embarrassing part is i was 12. think about just like the level of embarrassment you feel is different when you’re 12. this is like this is at the top of the list and in my mind to transfer over that’s traumatizing that’s terrible and then you have to totally think about your brother having sex too i can only imagine that seems well it actually doesn’t seem like he did there were 40 condoms in the suitcase so it’s also embarrassing for your brother’s reputation because clearly nothing happened if you had that much left over yeah all right a lot of embarrassed people in this scenario non-hypothetical june 2008 russian airport security oh [ ] lifted my giant dirty underwear out of my bag with a stick and held it up and stared at it he [ ] around he found out what’s what what is happening i don’t understand what that means he [ ] around he found out that sounds like a tag for for a movie a movie yeah exactly he [ ] around and he found out he found out at lovely landfill i would put i would put like examining dirty clothes yeah a used colonoscopy bag yeah i mean we got a stool sample going so i feel like we don’t need the redundancy there i work at the airport i was told about a guy who came in one time he put his dead mother oh my god in a suit bag and was trying to put her in with checked baggage because he couldn’t afford a coffin or anything for a funeral oh no that’s so this is sad and messed up i there’s no that’s not embarrassing no like logistically i have some questions about this well it was a suit bag so she was getting a mighty mighty sturdy suit bag probably under five foot thanks for clarifying that now i can process this let’s go through some of these full jar peanut butter and a shoe a stinky cucumber two signed copies pickleback album silver side up how about a polaroid picture that a friend took from the drunken night out you had together with your pals in which you were dared to put a leopard banana hammock that you used as a g-string to moon the camera so polaroid pictures of you in a banana hammock so so we’ll say like compromising sexual photos of yourself yeah a bag of hair clippings with dates on them dating back to 1998. this is the second bag of hair clippings that we have encountered on this list people are freaks wow more than one at-home enema kit like a whole lot of them okay this is at jack of one trade i can i feel like we can transfer that over to the list because i i like that might be a possibility like you you might have multiple enema kits what’s this sir are these multiple enema kits that’s when we go when we go into the sheet where we’re doing like the ranking i went through the metal detectors and the screen showed a yellow square where my cooter is in front of everybody spanx do spanx have hooter highlighters yeah they have stitching all around like to to compress different parts of your body uh-huh i would find that incredibly embarrassing is to have your spanx kind of on display the whole reason that you wear spanx is to be like yeah you know creating an illusion yeah and to have your illusion completely are you wearing spanx no are those skims are those skims or those spanx where was the sail yeah okay so we’ll just put spanx double ended dildo and a copy of requiem for entry i really like that who said that at pike t f n c e cartel what am i doing i don’t know cartel okay so this next one it lady anti-monkey butt anti-friction powder with calamine it’s a sweat absorber and friction fighter for wet booty ah that would be really embarrassing yeah i see this bottle this is the picture this bottle is a six ouncer so you’re asking for it we have a lot of butt stuff we have the enema we have the uh of course the butt plug which i don’t even think we added to the list we have the stool samples and now we have this anti-butt sweat but i do think it’s all valid i do think we should transfer it over there’s a there’s a there’s like a category there yeah yeah yeah yeah a dildo so long it curls around the bag multiple times see that’s what i think the subway says the subway sandwich the subway sandwich he thought that’s what it was gonna be okay um okay maybe some weird yeast infection meds or some kind of std medication okay medication yeah yeah i think that’s valid that’s a valid one a deflated sex doll that would be embarrassing yeah that that’s above that somehow it takes it to the next level above sex toy yes because this person has tried to make it smaller yes right they’re not it’s not on display yeah they’re trying to conceal it they’re trying to wrap it as we’ve decided is yeah yeah yeah that makes sense and this makes me think of another very embarrassing thing that i saw a picture of which was a deconstructed mannequin so imagine a man again whose parts are well separated oh i’ve been there to fit into one carry-on that’s a good bag yeah that’s a good one the person whose bag that was was on their way to a first aid conference so oh yeah okay that means that’s embarrassing yeah but you know everybody that’s looking at that i think their first assumption is that it’s some like a sex doll and you’re like no no it’s my it’s too hard i mean that works too hard to have sex with it would be uncomfortable can i add one from person another person experience yeah handcuffs excuse me handcuffs were taken off of my body off of my person going through mexico city i went to mexico city for my bachelorette party at the end of the trip my cousin hands me a little gift bag and she’s like i know we didn’t do like gifts or anything but i had a little fun little gag gift for you i opened it and there were handcuffs they were not fuzzy they were not cute they were like legit handcuffs and i laughed and i was like okay thank you i stuffed it in my bag went to the airport i was stopped and here’s another scenario where i have to speak spanish to get myself out of an uncomfortable situation and i don’t know what to say they’re like ma’am you can’t take these into the plane i’m like oh una fiesta bachelorette and i’m just like mortified because i’m like i’m that dumb american girl that’s going through tsa with a bachelorette gag gift so that was pretty pretty uncomfortable all right these were really great uh great suggestions i think we can move some of them over to our definitive top 10 list we have the use pad wrapped in tp we have a plastic bag containing a copy of florida georgia line travel size bottle lube nra membership card we have the stool sample we have an empty bag we have underwear with skidmarks picture of the tsa agent full and open water bottle uh the condoms on the the the charity trip we have he [ ] around he found out [Laughter] dirty underwear dirty dirty clothes being dirty closed we have a polaroid picture that are compromising that’s compromising uh more than one at-home enema kit we have uh the cooter square for the spanx thanks we have the std or yeast infection meds a deconstructed mannequin a deflated sex doll and handcuffs let’s go about it this way what is to you the most embarrassing thing from this list that they could find the most embarrassing would be a used pad wrapped up that is something i tried to hide i had a moment where i tried to get rid of it i couldn’t i’m gonna be stressed out i stuffed it in my bag not thinking straight and then somebody found it yes okay i totally agree let’s move that one up our list i would say the next one on my embarrassing list honestly would be probably the stool because i totally literal [ ] literal [ ] is in your logan from logan’s [ ] is in your not that would be even more embarrassing if it was not your own even and then they just had a label and said not mine like they opened it like it’s not mine is this a [ ] in your bag yes but it is not my [ ] it is logan’s [ ] it’s logan’s [ ] in my bag so let’s okay let’s move let’s move stool up uh i think we can agree on that what’s your next one maybe it’s the full unopened water bottle i should have known better yes yes yes it’s a different kind of embarrassment but it is it is valid it’s valid let’s see what else do we have i would say see this is where i don’t mean to bring it back up but i do feel like this is where we get into sex toy territory and you would apparently not be embarrassed at all to have an odd sex toy and you’re i just think you’re asking to be flagged down if you’re putting it in your checked your carry-on like you’re you just think that you’re like kind of into it yeah there’s a yeah but here’s the thing what about a convenience i don’t want to check luggage it could get lost steve i just want to go right through and i need to have that 12 inch dragon butt dildo on butt butt plug butt plug yeah okay the person that has a 12 inch thing like that is not looking for convenience so i just you know fine fine okay but on that on that note though the deflated sex doll i don’t know if it’s the next one but for me this is a person that tried to get away with yes i’ll i’ll pause on the butt plug i will give you the deflated sex doll but i want to put on that line the um deconstructed uh mannequin yes that you also voiced i think deconstruct the mannequin inflatable sex doll can we put that on the scene yes we ahead of that line what about the 12 year old going through tsa getting stopped for having her brothers come yeah this shame there’s like a sh i agree you’re going about you’re you’re putting yourself mentally in the place of the person and the 12 year old is it’s like we mentioned that is high embarrassment factor so i’m going there it doesn’t put it up there i’m willing to put it up there uh and specifically of note brothers old condoms i think uh yeah is the name of the album that we’re playing for for that particular one brothers old condoms i have a proposal for the next one okay this is like the stuff that’s embarrassing because you don’t want people to know about it and it’s the spanx i’m not embarrassed that the spanx show up in my bag i’m embarrassed if the spanx are put on the digital display as i walk through i’m willing to have it grace our list i don’t know if you’re going to put it you know i want to know your opinion on this um picture of the tsa agent because it’s a little clever yeah but assuming in a world in which that could be a possibility that would be really embarrassing like let’s say you know the tsa is your tsa agent is is your crush oh you accidentally wind up in their line i would be notified because i’m the that would be so embarrassing you you didn’t keep that picture on your phone you went to a cbs one hour photo and you printed it okay so we can we can can we move that one up let’s get that one up all right is dirty underwear less embarrassing than getting caught by your crush dirty underwear is more embarrassing because in my mind because back to the [ ] um argument of the stool sample i mean like you have i was gonna say i was gonna do a call back to logan but i couldn’t do it you have logan’s dirty and dirty no okay yes let’s bring dirty underwear up onto this list i think it goes above the picture of the tsa agent for sure i’m actually feeling like now that we have these sick things up on the list i feel like maybe the the deflated dolls and the deconstructed mannequins might be less embarrassing than dirty underwear oh my god why you love sex toys you’re so you’re accepting fine fine okay so maybe we put deflated sextile deconstructed mannequin at number nine after tsa agent yeah so we move everything up and put that at number nine i think that the stool sample cancels out that i agree with you and i’m starting to feel like we shouldn’t feel embarrassed by things that we need to make our bodies function naturally yes like the monkey butt anti yeah yeast infections yeah std medications yeah you should use that and be proud that you have that medication so i mean that kind of leaves nra man we have handcuffs we have the 12-inch dragon shaped butt plug might i bring up again i wish i had one i never thought i’d be like voting for a 12-inch i feel like that’s very much in character i feel like that’s the only thing you would tweet out if somebody asked you the same question well okay so here yeah so here’s the thing like it’s hard to put the nra man on the list i suppose because we just don’t want to have nra man on a list that we publish valid so then we’re left with handcuffs and the butt plug we’re running out of time and for that reason only i’m gonna let you have the 12 inch dragon shaped plug only only if okay we add a detail okay stevie’s 12-inch dragon shaped plug that’s you do we have a p.o box and now i’m going to be getting a bunch of 12-inch dragon butt plugs which i’m okay with obviously that would be a fun collection huh i don’t know how many like different versions exist but like you know i could see like it’s kind of a cool thing to have like on yeah exactly like your office desk fine i’m fine with that so we only have our top nine and yes in the interest of time i’m gonna tell you what i’m gonna be okay with adding nothing to the list and moving stevie’s 12-inch dragon shaped butt plug up to number nine to add nothing to the list and number 10 as long as it’s naked it’s on the list you’re gonna get a bunch of nothing to the p.o box okay at number 10 we have nothing at number nine we have a 12 inch dragon shaped butt plug at number eight we have spanx with cooter square at number seven picture of the tsa agent number six a deflated doll sex doll slash deconstructed mannequin at number five dirty underwear at number four brothers old condoms at number three a full unopened water bottle at number two a stool sample and at number one we have a used pad wrapped up that is the definitive top ten list of the most embarrassing things that tsa could catch you with going through security people that are listening to this podcast i want to know if you ever get caught or see someone get caught with one of these things please tell us yeah hit us up with hashtag gaygrimslee on twitter and we will amend our pictures welcome okay now it’s time for the awkward moment awkward social moment awkward of the week i honestly feel like we just had it well yes what happened anything anything well particularly awkward for you this week i legitimately want your advice on this moment so i love my neighborhood i know i love my neighbors i walk around my neighborhood all the time and when you walk around my neighborhood you have to interact with various different neighbors and it’s usually like a hey how are you how’s it going type of like surface level conversation cassie knows the majority of our neighbors by name maybe she’ll like catch up on a thing i think i’ve talked about my neighbors before but i’ve encountered a situation recently where if you’re walking in the same direction oh as and and you really don’t want to walk with the neighbor we had this situation happen where like this older woman who i don’t really know and her little dog her little dog in ringo like met and then it became very apparent that we were walking in the same direction i had nothing to discuss with this woman and cassie was like trying to be polite-ish and kind of like letting the dogs meet i decided in my awkward brain that it would be acceptable for me to walk about 10 feet ahead of her and quickly like to imply i guess we were going like on an athletic walk of some kind and she was behind she can’t catch up she wasn’t taking the she wasn’t taking the hint cassie wasn’t like oh this is her attempt to get away from this woman that we are also walking with so then it was just this like awkward few minutes of like me speed walking ahead by 10 feet and then realizing she wasn’t following me and like and i don’t know like legitimately how do you deal with that situation because you don’t want to be like excuse me ma’am i don’t want to walk right right because who knows maybe she also didn’t want to walk with you guys and she’s going through the same dilemma yeah okay what a cringe-worthy moment oh okay okay one idea is this okay you’re walking away from your house somewhere right yes you could say oh shoot i forgot something at home cassie we need to go back grab it thank you so good to see you jan we’ll catch you later jan we’ll catch you later all right cutest dog and then you get out you go the opposite direction that’s good that sucks because then you’re not on your pile inconvenience yes yeah it’s an inconvenience but weighing the the social awkwardness versus having to delay by a moment that’s smart that is smart i could not think well i thought of my feet without my feet ten feet ahead but i couldn’t think of any other situations was it still nice for you to walk ahead like did you get something out of it like some quiet time or you were just stressed the whole time no and i was in my mind i was going why do i find this to be like acceptable like if there’s something about interacting with neighbors that i’m like it’s okay if you’re a little bit rude i don’t know what i’m thinking fascinating okay that that was super helpful this is exactly why i wanted to to wait until this very moment to ask your advice so i appreciate it uh you’re welcome and i have one for you next week okay it’s in the theme it’s in this theme next week we have a guest we have a very exciting guest my sister who is an ob gyn it’s vagina themed not what you think okay well i’m really good at vaginas so i hope i can help you out if anyone can it’s you all right that’s it thanks for listening to best friends back all right and if you uh enjoyed the interaction that you heard today i have a sinking suspicion sneaking suspicion both that you will really love good mythical evening uh that is our r-rated night of entertainment and mythicality where you can hear a lot about 12-inch uh dragon shaped butt plugs sex dolls and other things that you don’t want to be caught with going through tsa uh tickets are on sale today at goodmethclevening.com so go check that out and you can catch brand new episodes of best friends back all right every friday make sure to follow so you don’t miss an episode if you’re enjoying the podcast leave us a review you can follow at mythical pods on tick tock for clips to share with family and friends you can follow me at negin and stevie everywhere at stevie w levine and of course you can hear me every monday through friday on good mythical morning with rhettanlink youtube.com good mythical morning i’ll see you there [Music] you