Hello friends we did want to let you know before listening to this week’s episode of best friends back all right we will be talking about Fitness Nutrition if any of those things are triggering for you please take care when listening to this episode or go ahead and listen to one of your past favorites or skip ahead to the next episode thanks [Music] welcome to best friends back all right the show where two High School best friends try the best friend thing again I’m Negan homafad and I’m Stevie win Levine and today we’re talking about Fitness feeling the burn I’m wearing my cut off you look good girl like your muscle your arm muscles look defined and ready to podcast today trained by Phil more on that later but today we are having Phil catchidel Fitness coach trainer to superheroes like CW Star Girl Bond villains like Billy Magnuson and objects of Desire like Sarah Shahi okay good evil and sexy good evil and sexy and of course regular people like me and my husband you’re not regular please you’re a podcaster yeah so I’m really excited because we are just like in this middle of the middle of two intense holiday season or two holidays where I feel like there’s just so much excess yeah and a breakup of routine and all of the stuff that for me always is like a signal of like okay how do I want to stay on track with my life yeah there’s like a date that you pick uh you know like now maybe a week before now no two weeks before this episode comes out where you’re like I can give up for the rest of the year right yes that’s acceptable and then it gets cold outside and like every part of the environment is telling you like it’s okay to give up everything’s fine and then you do a spiral you feel bad about yourself um how do we avoid all that that’s I think top of mind for you and I uh that is speaking of cold is it getting cold in L.A right now I mean Define cold you know it’s like yes yesterday I I mean that I don’t know context to give to when this releases but you know it was like mid 60s lower 70s a little chilly a little chill in the air you know I’m very jealous it’s here it’s in the 40s here it’s like the type where when you go outside it’s it’s more than nippy I’d say I’ve got to wear a bra now like I could go I got through excuse me of the summer must be nice freeing the nipple and now it’s just too cold not to wear a bra okay well I hope there’s no chafing I don’t know I saw a marathon clip the other day on Tick Tock and the guy uh had to take off his shirt because of nipple because that’s and I just that’s what I took away from the marathon clip was not like you can do it too it was like don’t run a marathon chafe your nipples okay I have a question and maybe maybe Phil can eventually answer this but I’ve only ever heard of men um with chafed nipples and their nipples bleeding or cracking I’ve never heard of a woman because we don’t talk about it I’ve never no I have no idea I’ve never had luckily I’ve never had chafed nipples before I’ve never done enough physical exercise to have chafed nipples I mean maybe that’s the problem maybe that’s what we need to be asking ourselves have we not done enough for chafe nipples exactly yeah and maybe this is the perfect time to have Phil join us to answer this very important question women’s nipples bleed welcome to the show Phil okay Phil hi yeah what a what an intro what an intro it took all my willpower to not I was like trying to I feel how SNL people must try to like withhold cracking up through the whole intro I’m like they’re gonna hear me oh yeah I’m here for the nipples I’ll tell you what I I have four children none of which I have breastfed but uh their moms haven’t talk about [ ] uh can I say anything you can say [ ] okay yeah yeah nipple problems man so yeah okay so nipples do chafe oh they chafe they bleed they cracked like a mama in Mama world that’s one thing I would say I’ve had I’ve never had clients or women I trained some marathoners um tell me about running but I feel like maybe like double strap it down double sports bra I mean okay when you’re running long you got even if you have like small breasts you gotta like friggin like yeah and I think some of them tape up tape them down maybe yeah there’s there’s Google for that I’ve feel like you know yeah because that’s an issue that’s an issue with the bloody nips are no fun I love I love when your wife listens to this podcast yes she’s just gonna be like wow right from the start you’re talking about blast crackly nipples beautiful beautiful nymphs this is one of the things that I loved about Phil one of the so just a little back story Zach and I started training with Phil sometime in 2021 and write out the gate I just loved how much of an open book he was like we could ask him any question as many times there was nothing that was too inappropriate or too out there to ask and I felt like that was one of your most amazing qualities as a trainer is that they felt like there was no judgment for any of the questions that we had which is so fantastic for this show because we really do love to ask whatever comes to our mind and whatever comes to our friends is mine who have asked questions so our friends is do you have trouble saying words that have like you know when you have a plural word with the apostrophe at the end I think broadly I have trouble saying words sometimes so friends here is good yeah Francis sounds incredibly incorrect Phil can I tell you I um you know when Nadine first proposed that you come on the show she said my trainer and Logan and I both hurt well at least I’m speaking for myself heard that dear God no I heard that she wanted to have someone named Mike trainer on the show and so we were like okay we don’t know who my trainer is but yeah we’ll put that on the list and so then like when you’ve been scheduled to to come talk to us it is taking all of my concentration not to call you Mike and to call you Phil Trainor I I consciously have to call you Phil and not Mike it’s the weirdest brain thing I love that you could like save me in contacts that way Mike my trainer an alias I’ll take it yeah anyway so our friends is uh did submit I would say the most questions for any expert we’ve had on the show yeah uh as soon as I tweeted about it we have a whole host of questions for you a lot of which you cannot answer them so we won’t be asking you but but there there are a number of questions that I think uh broadly apply to people listening that I’m excited to get the answers to and then just some questions from the two of us because it’s our show I mean yeah yeah we gotta ask about ourselves we’re allowed to be selfish put ourselves first for once well okay I’m I’m I will say DV and I talked about this but I will speak for myself I have not been fantastic about going to the gym for the last two months it has been it has gotten colder I have the gym is no longer in my building I have to walk 10 minutes to get there uh and I’m just feeling a general lack of motivation but knowing that you were going to come onto the show this week has made me feel so motivated especially this week to go to the gym to you know so you have gone to the gym this week is what you’re saying I’ve gone to the gym three times this week dude I got on the Peloton Voice already this week so this is the thing accountability I feel like has so much to do with establishing a routine but I would love for you to talk a little bit Phil about what it’s like for you what do you Rec what you recommend to your clients who are going from a status of like no movement and yeah you’ve required movement right because you you train obviously like people that are proper athletes right but you also train like you know people that are starting for the first time so what what do you normally say to somebody who’s like I can’t move but I need to move uh yeah so I guess first of all I’ll address that because a lot of people see my Instagram or something like oh celebrity trainer he’s trained this but then they’ll also see me posting with somebody who’s like uh not in the Judgment way but like very obese or seemingly very beginner and uh that’s kind of part of my whole philosophy in my training I do online training across the world in-person training is my time is my time my rate is my rate so I realize it’s not accessible to everybody but I want to help everybody so if you’re committed if you have a goal like I train stay-at-home parents I train teachers and then I have celebrities I train two billionaires right now so I guess I used to Market myself trying to be all like cool you know I’ve been doing this a very long time and then I realized oh shoot like what I actually care about is helping people I grew up I had cancer as a kid my father passed away from cancer my brother had cancer my brother-in-law has cancer now so [ ] it like Health has been my entire life and journey I am in it to help people but I’m married I got a bunch of kids it’s also important to make money and I want to be an expert in the field so yeah I train everyone so what I what I think is most important is sustainability so if someone comes to me and they’re an athlete or they’re an actor it was referenced before I trained Sarah Shahi her and her ex-husband Steve Howey for eight years you can talk more about Sarah Lee yeah she’s wonderful but they they have the same bodies as other people you know but they have the means to have a trainer all the time a nutritionist somebody cooking food so like the path to get there is the same but it’s a lot easier for me to say hey do these two workouts a day and they don’t have to worry about time and budget constraints right not not to take anything away it’s the same path to get there but for some people to do it’s a lot easier so I can give them something that’s crazy hard but they have to do it and they’re no if they do it I get paid x amount per episode or movie like it’s a lot more motivating with the monetary compensation when I train everyday people they’re like I saw this amazing workout program like it’s five days a week I’m like hey right now you’re sitting on your couch feeling bad about yourself let’s not aim for five let’s aim for two and let’s not aim for one hour let’s aim for 30 minutes so my my original goal for everyone is two days a week for 30 minutes if they knock that out two weeks in a row we output to three days for 30 minutes if they knock that out instead of going to four days I’m a really big fan of extending the workout so I really think building habits that are going to stay with you or t because the people who do the yo-yo diets or the yo-yo workouts they’re never happy because every year or every other year like I’m up 20 and I’m down 10 or I’m doing cardio bar and now I’m doing spinning and now I’m doing CrossFit like sustainability for lifestyle habits for for health for Aesthetics of how you look for mental health for all these things it has to be something you can do forever and you can go times where you go harder or times where you pull back but if it’s so hard you want to quit that’s not the right program that makes a lot of sense also just like building yourself up and not going from one to 100 immediately I think it’s 100 you know speaking of this Sarah’s shahis of the world it’s hard I think when you when you see a kind of peak achievement or Peak Physical attractiveness yeah yeah and that and and you’re watching by the way from your couch um you know you’re like I want that you’re not like I want I want to I think it’s well let me know if you feel this way it’s it’s a lot healthier an Outlook to go I want to better myself versus I want to get to that person’s level their level yeah but it’s hard it’s really hard to to do that it’s super hard another thing too I think perspective is super important so again Sarah’s one of my best friends I love her she’s beautiful but she’s always been in shape and she’s always been beautiful for over 25 years she’s had this body she was a cheerleader she was a model she’s all these things so it’s a lot easier to stay in shape than it is to get in shape so if if a woman’s sitting there 35 to 45 watching L word or sex life and they’re like oh my God she’s my age and she had kids and looked like this talking about me you know or or us for that matter um if you’re watching it see this like not again not to take away she [ ] it she works her ass off she’s dedicated she’s disciplined but it’s a lot easier to maintain something and also she’s genetically blessed like she got it she works it and she works hard to keep it so yeah she can compare her best to her best but she’ll come to me like oh man like I gotta get in shape we’re shooting again for this um and then now I live in a different state but like we’ll try and catch up or she’s training with I think Ryan or some other people in LA but the point being yeah don’t compare yourself to anybody else and especially like uh I wrote a whole book on on body types and like if you’re a five foot three maybe more full-figured Latina for example and you’re trying to follow goop or Gwyneth Paltrow like not to specifically [ ] on that but like that that is a very specific type of person that’s a very specific lifestyle that’s a very specific body type and uh kind of like lean holistic whatever that works for some people and no judgment like if what works for you is what works for you I do think there’s objective data and I like to be sciency in my Approach but all that to say yeah if you’re sitting on your couch it’s okay to get externally motivated by somebody like I admire I respect that person but then to think you can look like that person that you gotta you gotta draw the line get motivated and then take the motivation internally and be like now I’m going to set this goal for myself that’s for your body and your mental state not to if you if you set it to another person you’re only going to be let down it’s so much easier said than done but it’s so right yeah yeah I mean I started lifting because of Arnold Schwarzenegger when I was 14. I’m not gonna look like the guy but it was good to get me into it yeah but you know what’s nice is you can hire an accent coach and he can help you at least sound a little bit more like yeah exactly so Phil I want to talk a little bit about these goals that we can set for ourselves because growing up I feel like one of the goals that I saw like yelled at me through the media through everything around me was like lose weight lose weight the the only goal was to lose weight yeah and it seems like it is such a detrimental goal to set um in many ways and something that you worked on with me and Zach was not really about losing weight but it was growing strength and it was about like what you said about extending the length of the time that you train your endurance and things like that and I found that um it was in some ways I was like okay we’ll see how this goes but it felt very empowering to get to the spot where I was like oh my God I’d never lifted weights before and now I can lift this large weight without even thinking about it and like if I find that to be really empowering but it’s also something I need to remind myself one year later of and so I’m hoping you can talk a little bit again about how to set the right goals for yourself that are actually achievable and motivating societal Norms are a [ ] man I I saw that I mean it made the rounds of the internet but uh what is it they’re calling heroin Chic and the whole thing and the yeah Kate Moss 90s no no it’s wild but training women to be strong I’ve been a huge fan of um he’s a uber much more successful trainer than I’ve been Bruno know he trains everybody and I’ve never heard of him but I love how he’s he’s been so impactful with uh Chelsea Handler and all his funny videos but Jessica Biel all these people who you would think of like these slender petite women and showing them dead lifting 200 250 pounds and showing how they can be strong and when I first started with Sarah she’s like oh I don’t want to be buff and there’s this very kind of mentality that’s been thrown out there that being strong means you’re going to be masculine or buff or or butcher they use all these kind of just derogatory terms but you can be whatever you want first of all but you can also be feminine and strong as hell and do chin-ups and squat 150 200 pounds do all these things so I think goals it’s important to set what I call health goals and you’ll see in the literature or podcast everyone’s talking lately not about lifespan but about health span so not just about living to 89 or 100 but it’s about feeling awesome when you’re 40 50 60 not like you’re falling apart and so I think your goals if you if you set out to be healthy I call looking good a positive side effect if you set out to look good you’re going to try Extreme Measures to get there and you’re actually going to be unhealthy and then you’re also not going to look good so it’s it’s a short a short-term view versus a long-term view if you set up to be healthy you’re gonna get there it will happen it might be slower than you want but you’ll get there if you do the reverse nine times out of ten every anyone I’ve had who’s had that path uh has failed in my experience barring very very few people that’s super helpful I hope the friends is listening uh get that point because I I don’t think I’ve ever quite heard it stated that way that like even mentally when you set those goals for yourself setting it in the context of Health versus looking good um I think is is super interesting I think that I mean to the heroine Chic of it all the whole camera adding 10 pounds thing is actually true to a certain it’s so true it’s so true it’s crazy I mean I know that and and I think that like you know being a personality of any kind or being on camera it does psychologically affect you in in a numerous amount of ways but also you know especially when you’re trying to work on yourself there’s a disparity between what’s real and what’s on camera and also how you see yourself and how others see yourself so I know that personally I’ve definitely struggled with well I’m feeling I’m feeling good I actually did the Peloton four times this week and my arms are looking good for me but I just shot this thing and it came out and oh my God I I look you know bigger than I want to look or like my muscles aren’t defined in the way that I thought they were in real life and um like talking through that narrative with myself and going yeah but I don’t think that’s real like I I actually do think that the you look that the camera does add 10 pounds and then it absolutely does I I had never done like I I had I’m in Fitness because I love Fitness but I’ve now had the opportunity to be on not just podcasts but a bunch of TV stuff and now I host my own Fitness series on this iFit platform and I’m trying to pitch US Travel Fitness TV show and the first time I saw myself on the camera and I think of like you know I have abs I’m a lean guy I was like oh holy crap like I look like a rectangular box like and it was I heard that I’d heard that but it was the first time where I perceived and I was like my cheek what do I got hamster cheeks like I’d never I’ve never had body dysmorphia but after seeing myself on camera like oh shoot yeah my God I don’t I’m lucky to not suffer but I it totally warped my perception like when you hear your voice and you’re like oh what do I sound like it’s yeah it’s the same thing but now when you do answering machine on the answering machine yes you guys still have which everyone has yeah no but I do Wonder for people like I mean I we shouldn’t keep going back to Sarah because I know she’s not the only actress that she that you’ve trained but yeah but I do think that like we we always go back to the L word on this show and one of the things about the original L word is like all the actresses are insanely thin and they’re insanely thin on the screen and so like yeah you start to realize that okay I see myself on camera camera adds 10 pounds to me I don’t look insanely thin but I am a skinny person yes exactly camera I have 10 pounds to them and they still look excessively yeah how is that even achievable and I I think the reality is that it’s not so I have a few thoughts and I hope I hope this is helpful but I think the number one thing to realize is this is these people’s jobs so they have they have been scouted they have been selected they have been auditioned unfortunately very heavily based on the way they look and they were casting for a certain type and a minority but a certain fragment of the population just come that way and they’re petite and they’re dainty and they’re this and so they get cast into those roles and it kind of falls to the Sarah thing where yeah they’re doing work and yeah they’re working out and eating well hopefully being healthy about it not at all dismissed there are tons of eating disorders and problems and back in the day there was what that ridiculous like smoke a cigarette sauvignon blanc tuna fish and white wine sauce sale like that was the vote writing the vote diet yeah that was like the 1975 Vogue diet and it’s absurd but that is a lifestyle that some people have not good not healthy not condoning it but those people end up in these roles and it becomes weird to wear it’s inspirational or aspirational for some reason even though we’re looking at them we’re like this should not be like I have never smoked a day in my life it’s not healthy objectively it’s bad I don’t know what’s in my brain you see like a cowboy smoking in the Marlboro Manor like some Rockstar you’re like [ ] that looks cool yeah yeah I don’t know I don’t know why it’s dumb and like three people in my family died from lung cancer like no but our brains we have dumb brains we’re smart but we’re dumb and I don’t know I’m not your therapist or anyone’s therapist not even my own therapist to like go through what kind of self-work that takes but I think separating the reality from it and then being like I’m not this person I’m not expected to have the standard I’m not being paid this money I wasn’t selected to be like you’re not that person so stop holding yourself to that standard yeah is step one and also you told me this Phil it’s not just food and working out that got those people the amazing bodies they have I knew this would come up yes go ahead but I’ll elucidate said Point well I’m letting there’s some devil worship isn’t there yeah I’m letting you fill in the Gap here it’s like so much of what we see what we see online for these people that are you know either celebrity trainers even some of them like Fitness absolutely some of the best fitness models it’s not just food and food and working out what is it you’re leaving me hanging you two know I’ll answer I promise okay so I’m I’m all for personal choice and I’m also pretty chill about like people doing whatever they want to do to their bodies for their bodies however I really hate hypocrisy so so many of it’s it’s more prevalent in the Instagram like fitness model bodybuilder figure model world and it’s like it’s one thing to have a breast implant you got a boob job you got a nose job like again I’m for these things like if it makes you feel better and more comfortable and confident as long as it’s not an addiction and harming you that’s okay but when you’re when people are like oh my god look I put this product on my face and it de-aged me 20 years I’m like no it’s the [ ] lasers and the peptides you’re injecting or like I can eat whatever I want and I know for a fact they’re taking tessamorolin or growth hormone or they’re having doctor or hormone replacement therapy for the guys testosterone replacement therapy super medically useful a lot of people will double the dose they’ll take extra GH they’ll take some steroid cycles things like this and it’s a double-ish sword because we as the consumers it’s the same reason it happens in sports and baseball we want people to look hotter we want new records it’s boring to have the same thing and we kind of maxed out the human limit a long time ago frankly and so the only way to get past it is surgical enhancements chemical enhancements biohacking and it used to be super frowned upon now it’s kind of accepted mainstream as long as you’re open about it but then at the same time like I’m not going to throw anyone at the bus but some of the biggest superheroes are some of like the hardest worker in the room like I’m or the liver King guy like I’m not gonna go on record saying that I know anything but there are very obvious tells physiologically both for men and women it’s the nipple chafing and it’s the nips actually you can tell when a man’s been on steroids because they get the mammary glands behind their nipples grow and if you see puffy nipples you can easily tell so there are a lot of tells and again and to be clear I’m I’m okay with people doing this and I even I recognize what a Hollywood roll demands of people for certain things is not naturally achievable they’re like you have four months to get like this I don’t care if you hire me and all the best trainers in the world and have a super coach science has bodies have limits so I’m okay with all this I don’t want to judge anybody but I hate that the system makes it feel like you have to lie about it so you don’t get caught for being illegal or cheating and then you have all of these teenagers and 20 year olds and all of us who grew up with like eating disorders or wanting like one of my favorite documentaries of all time bigger faster stronger the side effects of being American it’s basically how these two brothers realized one by one every single one of their Heroes was juicing and they’re like oh [ ] guess we got guess we got to do it and again you do you but it’s like people just think you can achieve these things naturally and I think what’s that Einstein quote if if you’re a fish and you judge yourself by your ability to climb a tree of course you’re going to think you’re an idiot so if you’re a natural hard-working person and then you follow the same diet and work out as somebody who’s enhanced you’re gonna get a fraction of the results yeah so if you want to enhance yourself okay do it safely do it for yourself but also if you’re the person influencing all of these innocent people and saying it’s just hard work it is very hard work but it’s also this big thing you’re leaving out yeah right so it’s it’s a tough one um but it’s very prevalent it’s also very prevalent just in the general population and I think a lot of people are naive to how chemically or surgically enhanced a lot of people are it’s it’s a massive proportion and it’s okay to get that done but don’t hold you don’t compare yourself to someone who is if you’re not and you don’t want to go there reset your expectations foreign S I wanted to take this little musical break opportunity to ask you a question have you ever thought to yourself man I need a older Southern gentleman to tell me about paint colors and dad jokes and generally what’s going on in Myrtle Beach South Carolina if you answered yes to any of those questions boy do I have the perfect podcast for you it’s dispatches from Myrtle Beach featuring Good Mythical mornings link Neal and his father Charles it’s out now you can go listen to it wherever you get your podcast please make sure to follow so you don’t miss an episode if you like to laugh you’ll do that with that should we jump into some questions yeah let’s do it okay so this one Anna asked a question that I’m also interested in Anna is 24 a female and she says how long does it actually take to quote lose progress if you were taking a longer than usual rest from a very regimented workout schedule like if you’re sick or on vacation or just need the break for your body yeah so that’s a good question I think a lot of people the placebo effect and the nocebo effect are both very strong people oh my God it’s been three days so in general I find a lot of people who’ve been super regimented if they take a week off they’re actually going to be better because they haven’t rested that much in a long time so very frequently I’ll see people go on vacation or take a week off for things and they’re probably eating more food so they have a little calorie Surplus they’re probably sleeping better they’re significantly less stressed very often I’ll see them come back and they’re just crushing the workouts they’re more motivated and it’s kind of a nice thing for them to see for me to then point out Hey look it’s okay to give yourself a break every now and then that’s it to answer the question specifically I find that after two weeks it goes in order so the first thing to go is endurance so if you’re doing cardio or you’re doing hour-long workout sessions after two weeks off after three weeks off all of a sudden you’re halfway through your normal workout when you come back oh my gosh my muscles are spent so on average again it varies individuals but the majority people endurance goes first then the physique starts to go and it’s usually actually the strength that goes last so sometimes I’ll take like two weeks or three weeks off the gym or sometimes even six weeks like where I’ve only gone once a week bare minimum just so busy kids life things happening and I’ll come back and my bench press or squat or my lifting numbers are they’re the same but I do one set and I’m like oh my gosh I can’t do this two more times like I did a set of 10 I’m exhausted or I’ll be like okay I have the same strength but I’m visibly softer I’ve put on a little bit of body fat because I haven’t been keeping the same level of activity so my muscle’s still there it doesn’t just deflate and go away catabolizing eating your muscle away that happens after like months of inactivity here’s an easy stat to remember if you just work out two days a week you’re gonna maintain wherever you’re at so let’s say you were doing four five six days a week and all of a sudden you’re like I’m I’m exhausted I can’t do it and you even want to take a one month break if you just hit two workouts per week for four five six weeks and you just like need to mentally reframe it let your body rest you’ll probably come back to exactly where you left you’re not going to be above it you’re not going to see results but you won’t you won’t backslide you won’t lose that yeah but in general up to two weeks off other than a little endurance you’re not going to see anything and if you put on any body fat maybe a pound or two in that time frame Max you can lose that in one week and be absolutely back to normal so I wouldn’t worry about anything under two weeks anything over a month will be visible anything under that you can fix and if you just need to slow down which I always advise slowing down instead of stopping it’s a lot harder to restart than to just ramp up and to nerd out a bit there’s this book Atomic Habits by James Clear like one of the best books I’ve read on on habit setting and he has this very cliche but amazing line standardized before you optimize so like set your habits up just make everything wrote you brush your teeth you do whatever you take a shower cool make your workouts that but just standardize it if someday days you have to scale it from an hour down to 10 minutes still do it don’t skip it if some days you get off your diet and you eat a delicious piece of cake that’s fine just don’t then eat the whole cake and be like oh well I already screwed up so I should eat the whole thing like another guy he says if you go out and you have a flat tire Why You’re Gonna Go slash the other three just to say [ ] it all and so that’s just that’s the way don’t sell sabotage just because something didn’t go to plan just slow it down and and reframe and regroup and get back at it I love the specificity of each week I honestly did not think that there was such a specific answer and I know that like there’s fluctuation I’m sure but it’s very helpful as a as a guide especially at this time of year for people too because I I noticed too that like I I by the way hate going to the gym mostly because uh the going to part um so that’s why I work out at home and and use the Peloton a lot um but that means that like if I go on vacation it’s a little bit harder for me because like I’m I’m away from my Peloton so I don’t want to you know do it um so yeah I for the pandemic for the most the pandemic I maintained like getting on the Peloton three times a week for like almost two years like for a really long time um and then I had like a couple weeks where I was like I have to go on vacation for I have to go on vacation like I’m going to miss this week it’s going to mess up my thing um and now I just don’t really care that much but having that in the back is is yeah is great and uh quick quick answer just to follow in the reverse because I know people love numbers I’ll give specifics where I can same thing when you’re starting a workout program the first two weeks you’re just getting through it you’re sore you can’t finish the workouts you’re tired two weeks two weeks is building your endurance weeks two to four generally you can finish all the workouts and you start to get stronger pretty much immediately newbie games are like you couldn’t do five pounds and by week three you’re doing 10 pounds like it happens quick so weeks one and two are building endurance and getting used to it weeks three and four the strength starts to kick in week five and on is when you’re gonna visibly see changes you you can build a little muscle and burn fat in five weeks again that’s individualized and that’s assuming you’re really beginner if you’re super Advanced it could take you six months to to see the same results that somebody could see in six weeks if their start but as a general rule if you’re doing something for more than two weeks and you don’t see any results either you’re doing it wrong or it’s not the plan for you however a lot of people it is starting to work but it’s slower than they want and these are the these are the worst habits to form the people who do the the jump ship they’re like I did keto for a month and then I did only spinning and then the next month I did weights and Crossfit and I did high carb low-fat vegan and in the next month I’m intermittent fasting no no you have to do the same thing for months and months like up to six months it’s so boring right he’s like can I change this can I change this if you have a good trainer this is the mark of a good trainer they should never say I know for a fact they should use words like this is probably going to work or let’s evaluate after two weeks they should be confident but not [ ] like arrogant and then also they should make you do the same damn thing keep you motivated about it but your programming should not change for like minimum six weeks like six week blocks for the smallest I use I like to do 12 week blocks and that’s it I’m talking the exact same lift the exact same order the only thing that changes we’re trying to add reps or add intensity or add weight if you’re changing all the time muscle confusion is not real you’re actually slow you’re slowing down your results because of BS marketing that P90X made famous that’s not a real thing class pass also not a big fan but caveat doing anything and doing something is better than nothing yeah always always and burning calories and staying healthy for health concerns it’s all the same so everything I said you can take back if all you care about is getting endorphins feeling good and being healthy then everything I said goes out the window if your goal is that you specifically want to build a certain physique like you want to shape your body or you want to lose body fat you want to get stronger you want to do pull-ups for the first time you want to squat like anything to do with your physique or your strength that takes specific programmed progression and that is different from health so you have to choose your priority and they’re very different goals I feel like I I just when you told me that I felt like I had been scammed my entire life like so much money had been spent By Me on things like the orange theory or these different Pilates classes and they were all great for making me feel like I was prioritizing my health being active especially since I had a pretty sedentary job right it helps to like force myself in an environment where I’m going to move absolutely but these the marketing is definitely kind of telling me that this is going to help shape your body and do all these things that it doesn’t do right like and isn’t some of this stuff bad for you like running is it running [ ] bad for your body be honest Phil it’s not bad for your body but tell us what people tell me is it bad or something right it’s bad it’s bad if you run properly it’s not bad for your body but most people do not run properly ergo it becomes bad for their body but running is not necessary running is not necessary take it we’ll take it you like walking right go walking uh hiking inclined walks is the best of both worlds I love when you answer you you imply the answer in your question for Phil you love walking right absolutely yeah jogging I mean I’ll get clients all the time and they’re the classic I hate that we haven’t come up with a better term for this I’m going to say it I’m gonna apologize in advance skinny fat we’ve not like oh yeah yeah yeah we haven’t rebranded it yet we haven’t found a good way to say that in a not shitty way soft and small isn’t that that’s more like genetically based in a lot of ways right it’s like yes but it’s also the curse of the runner because what it is is you have you have very little body fat but you have even less muscle so the body fat you do have shows up and so that’s the person who’s skinny but with no tone and definition and then when you jog jug jug your body metabolizes both body fat and muscle because it says hey we want to run compare a marathon or to a sprinter dramatic like 80 pound difference 80 pound difference totally different so certain bodies are predisposed to be good at certain sports or look certain ways doesn’t mean you can’t do those things or you can’t change or you can’t do whatever you want to do but certain Michael Phelps the guy was built to swim his body his proportions he’s made to do that can someone else swim yeah sure is it likely they’ll ever get anywhere close to his level with if they’re six inches shorter and their arms aren’t like three inches long he has just the he was made to be a water baby and so certain people are going to excel at certain things but yeah this this notion that you gotta like do this and do that and do that it’s just all everyone’s got a product to sell and if if the product broadly applies to everybody not to say there’s not some good or some Merit to it but that’s probably a pretty good indicator that it’s not the best thing for you again it’s better than nothing but like if it worked for everybody we would have solved this issue 50 years ago and nothing works for everybody I saw a lot of questions that had to do with intermittent fasting so I did want to talk about that really quickly this one I’d love to this one’s from Douglas who’s 22 and he says does intermittent fasting really work to lose weight if so whatever benefits are involved or does it do more harm than good got it um so I can give you a pretty good answer here I will cite Dr Lane Norton he’s uh just did a really good study of studies like a meta-analysis on all of the data there’s tons of others but I find Dr Norton he does the best job of explaining sciency stuff in a very palatable way and if you look at the actual outcomes if your protein and your calories are the same if your protein and your calories are the same it does not matter at all for body fat reduction across the board low carb high fat high carb low fat low whatever High whatever low sugar this sugar no FODMAP this like if your protein and calories are the same across the board every single diet including intermittent fasting Nets out to the same amount of body fat there are some slight slight slight changes in LDL cholesterol or some other markers depending how high your fat was but like over the long term they’re basically the same for how your body is going to look and perform that being said the way I I treat intermittent fasting it’s a time management tool for some people it’s really easy to say oh I get 1900 calories a day to hit my goal this much protein this much fiber this many carbs and fat okay if I just break that into two meals in a snack and that’s it and I just don’t eat before and after their likelihood of success is a lot higher there are other people who try that and they’re like I feel terrible I have headaches and I cannot intermittent fast I didn’t I forced myself to do it for two months two months Phil yeah no anecdotally it did nothing for me I felt terrible the whole time I like to eat all of the time but to the flip side like five years ago what was The Fad they were selling you eat six times a day speed up your metabolism do this eat like if you have chicken in your pocket have chicken in your pot I missed that one I missed the chicken in your pot I think the the 1980s Tupperware people must have like yes like a party for all the so yeah if your calories and protein are the same you can switch around carbs and fats people are gonna push back on this that’s a scientific fact there are differences in glycogen and water retention and other things your your scale will change which does have a mental impact but body fat and muscle will not let’s talk about the scale because I think the scale is is uh is a [ ] you’re talking about the scale that weighs the scale yes okay the scale is that weighs you I want to hear what you think about scalesville and if tell us how to think about a scale healthily or to not think about it at all absolutely so I think uh just as intermittent fasting just to wrap that up it’s a tool so if it works for you and helping you build your physique your body or whatever you want great but for you to judge or say this is better than your thing that is objectively false and for someone else it might be worse conversely if you hate it and someone else loves it don’t say hey it doesn’t work it does work if you do it right just like any other healthy diet you can follow now a scale a scale is like intermittent fasting in that I treat it as a tool so some people like well my scale at the gym says this and my scale at home says this and water says this like the overarching things are are you getting enough hydration are you working out are you sleeping are you trying to de-stress are you doing all these things in general the best way I have had somebody explain this to me is if you weigh yourself every day and then you compare the average of the week so you weigh yourself every day you take the average weight you weigh yourself every day the next week and you compare the average of each week because especially women if it’s if you’re on your period you’ll gain like three to five pounds one or two days before your period that’s gonna fluctuate every day I wake up at 196 and I go to bed anywhere between 199 and 204. that’s 8 pounds so like your body can fluctuate so much a lot of chicken yeah and just like I drink a ton of water and you don’t pee it all out every night before you go to bed in your sleep on average somebody loses about two pounds overnight just through exhaling yeah you exhale CO2 all of your everything you metabolize comes out as carbon dioxide um or as water when you pee it out with vitamins and minerals but you you basically exhale you sweat and exhale two to three pounds overnight yeah well it’s funny because we were talking and we were talking uh before one of the episodes that we recorded before about like how we both had gained a little bit of weight and then I was doing like the calculus of like okay I made my partner you I was like Google if you’re on your period like if there’s more weight and she’s like yeah this is like three to five more pounds I’m like okay great we’ll take that into this calculator we’ll take every reason yeah yeah so I like this I like that so yeah so it’s a tool now let’s say like if your goal is specifically I have to lose weight or I have to shrink down I want to fit for women all the time and I don’t mean to be a sexist but like I want to fit into these clothes my sisters my mom my wife my clients this is the most common thing I need to fit into my old clothes I don’t want to spend money and buy new stuff okay well then the scale is important because you have to go down that way but don’t be if it’s the 0.3 or the 0.15 like it should Trend downwards don’t get caught up in the minutia of how many pounds this week for if it’s going the right way that’s a good sign if you’re trying to lose weight and it’s going the wrong way something’s going wrong so more important than that is the lean body mess so like are you keeping or gaining muscle and burning body fat because if you do a crash diet you can take those crazy like laxative diuretic things you can lose a bunch of water weight and a bunch of muscle at the same time you can lose 10 pounds but if five of it is muscle and five of it is fat for example even though you lost 10 pounds you’re actually the exact same body fat you’re gonna look skinny fatter you’re going to look the same because you weigh less but your ratio of muscle to fat is the exact same conversely if you only lose eight pounds instead of 10 pounds but seven of it is body fat and one of it is muscle you’re gonna measure smaller you’re going to feel better you’re going to be stronger and even though you weigh more two pounds more on the scale your body will look dramatically different so body composition which means how much muscle to Fat you have that ratio that’s way more important than just objective losing x amount or weighing x amount 130 at 50 18 body fat versus 130 at 25 body fat or 180 at that same or 200 at that same the the body fat composition matters way more you’re losing me Phil these are very Advanced numbers yeah scale I mean I don’t ever weigh myself unless it’s like a doctor’s appointment but because muscle weighs more than fat it kind of just threw off the whole scale thing for me personally for forever because I’m like what do we I mean it’s all about density so muscle like a pound is a pound right but a pound this is not scientifically accurate but like a pound of muscle is like a quarter again not exactly true and then a pound of fat is like a 20 bill yeah so like just the amount of space it takes up not by weight but just space so when you when you lose fat you shrink more and when you have muscle it gets tighter tone tone is a stupid word because you can’t just Tone If you don’t have muscle tone is just your muscle showing more than your body fat it has nothing to do with what there’s no workout better for toning toning just means you have lost body fat and you can see your muscle which you’ve hopefully built up and strengthened you know there’s a lot I see about like pre-workout uh stuff that you can drink or like a lot of you should eat x amount of time before you work out and this is what it should be and then after you work out this is what you should eat and when you should eat it and it’s very confusing because also like there’s a bunch of like contradictory things going on too so like I guess on the most basic level like what is there an answer that people can you know a guide people can use in general for eating before and after there is I think this answer it’s my favorite answer because to me it’s comforting some people are gonna hate it but it’s absolutely and completely up to personal preference so again comparing like the diet’s worth the protein the calories are the same then it doesn’t really matter all all diets will work the same if you follow them and you actually do them right so the same thing with this like yes statistically it’s significant so it’s true that if you eat more carbs before your workout you’ll have a slight increase in ATP and energy like if you eat one to two hours before you work out something with more carbs and protein you may perform better however some people do that and they feel super nauseous or they want to vomit there used to be this notion that you you had to have a protein shake 30 minutes after your workout it was called the anabolic window and like you get more protein synthesis and you’re going to build more muscle basically they’ve proven that all of that the effect isn’t zero but it’s like less than a couple percent like like one percent difference yeah and since the average person is already sleeping shitty super stressed out not drinking enough water drinking nine cups of coffee a day trying to stop take Adderall like whatever million problems they have going on that they’re trying to like fix medically yeah like unless you’re an Olympic level athlete the effect of that is so small that the the stress and the Panic it causes you is worse than just not giving a [ ] it’s not protein shake yeah so the easiest the easiest answer is work out hard drink water sleep well and then don’t worry about the stuff and if you do that forever and you want to go from like a 9.5 level super athlete to a 10 those small things start to matter for everybody else including myself as a fitness professional I don’t give a [ ] or follow any of that because it’s irrelevant I like that answer yeah I think that that’s a great answer because honestly lately I’m I’m more of an evening workout person which I know is a little bit odd but I’ve been trying like I’m gonna wake up early and then I got into this whole thing of like and I need to eat an hour before so now I’m really gonna wake up early and then I guess I’ll work for an hour that’s healthy and so yeah no taking that off the list of of musts I think is super helpful yeah so just don’t stress you may you may perform you may be a little stronger you might get 11 reps with a set of 10 if you eat before but what’s that matter if you feel crappy you get a headache or puke or so some days you might and some days you might not the point is overall if everything else is consistent and good it’s it’s essentially it’s a watch foreign Phil can you talk a little bit about how Fitness and and how our bodies in relation to Fitness change through the decades and let’s not go through all of the Decades but just like Stevie and I are obviously in our 30s the way the way that we maybe like moved around and did things is different than in our 20s and just things are changing things are hurting how can we take into account our age yeah so when you’re young you can kind of get away with anything right but there are a couple misconceptions so the first one is we throw kind of cautioned to the wind to ton when we’re young but we don’t realize how active we are a lot of people say oh no well my metabolism’s slowing down because I’m getting older our metabolism actually doesn’t slow down very much at all almost negligence yeah what happens is it’s activity levels that go so when you’re younger you’re singing you’re dancing you’re walking around you’re tapping you can’t like Mom drive me somewhere I can’t you gotta walk there so like or there was an Uber right uh back then other things so metabolism it does slow down again to be objective but it’s such a small amount especially year over year like if you compare decade to decade maybe you’ll get like a three to five percent Decline and then by your 60s to 80s it starts to kick in but basically that’s the least important factor in a very big hierarchy the number one is we across the board we tend to move less and then when we do work out we tend to work out less intensely like less hard so we burn less calories we burn less fat and we build less muscle so it all has to do with we kind of get more complacent and lazy and then we also do recover slower so we feel more tired we feel more sore but the people you see out there who are in their 40s 50s even 60s crushing it and staying super healthy and well the thing is kind of like I said to Sarah or referring to any other people the the trick is staying with it if you start in your 40s or 50s it can be done but you’re climbing up a hill if you’ve already done it your whole life and you’re maintaining it’s a lot easier however you might notice oh three workouts a week Taps you out you can’t do five anymore you might notice that you’re having to warm up for 10 minutes because you’re a little creaky you’re a little sore so you do you do have to change testosterone levels decrease for men estrogen levels decrease for women so osteoporosis perimenopausal menopausal things where things just hurt and I hate design but they they dry up that’s literally what happens all of these things and for men for men we got our promise things get soft things get droopy gravity sets in all of these are hormonal responses and we’re in a day and age where again I would I would estimate of the people I’ve worked with over the age of 40. more than 50 percent of the male cells are on testosterone replacement therapy the definition of a steroid an anabolic Story the definition of a steroid is anything related to testosterone so technically all of these dudes walking around are on steroids the difference is if you get it from a guy at the gym it’s called the steroid if you get if you get it from your doctor it’s totally legit right the crack cocaine debate right like yeah it’s the same freaking thing that you’re making one super race so I’m but no that being said what has made pharmaceutically safe license and the other could be made by your friend in his basement so I do not at all ever Advocate getting illegal drugs for anything but the point is it’s actually the same substance so like your bodybuilder friend who’s juicing the difference is he’s taking like three to ten times the amount that a healthy man would take just to replace their natural levels some people need it some don’t I’m currently training a guy who’s 34 years old he sent me his blood results online clinically dramatically low testosterone I said go to your doctor you need this you’re going to feel better overnight he feels like a new man it’s helping his marriage it’s helping his health everything and he didn’t know he wouldn’t have gone to the doctor without me because he didn’t think he had cancer he didn’t think he was dying I was like hey man you have all the symptoms of low T you’ve got to go totally new person I train a guy in he’s 64. he’s like my husband’s never horny gay man he’s like I want to [ ] all the time I don’t know what to do he does a testosterone tested it was like 900 I’m like dude what are you doing I want to be you when I grow up so it’s genetic it’s so many things but decades matter hormones matter so I gotta ask does the um just the steroid from the basement and the steroid from the doctor all result in a small PP no so that’s that’s a misconception if anything your your penis will grow so we go um well it’s just so your balls your balls shrink your testicles shrink because you stop producing your own testosterone so you become less fertile your ball shrink but your dick is probably bigger because you’re like horny for everything that walks no so no that’s why all of so there’s no other way to put it you got some issues okay I’m gonna come back I’m gonna come back at the end of the thing because I have a problem with with overactive men at the gym that I will yeah because they’re probably they’re probably all horned up and juicing because they’re gross yeah but it’s just it’s a huge problem all right Steve you want to give us another question um yeah I think this is one that I have heard so I’m curious if it’s true this is from Lisa Stone who’s 19 you lucky [ ] she says uh is it true that abdomen and core exercises will not help you lose belly fat besides dieting of course is cardio the only other way the answer is yes yeah I’ve heard that like the you know especially as it relates to to what I do like okay yeah if you’re if you’re writing a bike in a certain way or you’re lifting all of that goes into building ABS versus like yeah AB specific stuff so yeah couple answers so your ab your abdominal muscle and wall is like you have your stomach and then you have the ligaments and the things that go across it that Define your abs so some people have a four pack some have a six some have an eight some is off-centered like you can’t achieve an aesthetic that your body looks the way it looks according to where the cross sections of your abdomen wall is so that’s one genetic thing the only way they’re visible is by having low enough body fat for men it’s generally being under 12 body fat for women it’s generally being under 18 body fat and you can can’t choose where your body loses fat if you’re in a if you’re in a calorie deficit and you’re purposely under eating in a healthy way or you’re exercising more to burn more calories that’s how you lose weight you have to be in an energy deficit then your body will eat body fat you cannot choose where it comes from that is genetic and that is just how it goes what you can do is you can choose where your body puts on muscle by how you train it so doing sit-ups doing these things every day and then eating like [ ] you’ll get stronger ABS they’ll never be visible going to do a 50-minute plank or setting an eight-hour plank world record you’re gonna win the plank Olympics but if you’re eating chips and Coke and eating 5000 calories a day not visible so not to say AB training does nothing a strong core is important it’ll help a lot of other things in life the visibility has only an everything to do with nutrition cardio is helpful because you’ll burn calories but I have a full six pack I do not jog or do any cardio other than walking unless a company pays me to go run for them because I hate it and I don’t enjoy it can you talk more about that like that’s a whole thing because you know I think that a lot of people equate doing cardio with losing weight yeah so I will in no uncertain terms answer this question 10 times out of ten I will pick strength training over cardio training if you are currently working out with weights anytime less than three days a week but you’re doing Pilates or yoga or cardio or bar or anything else switch it to the opposite and you will see dramatically better changes in your physique so like I have all of the clients that I work with lift with weights three to five times a week depending on their goals and I have them all walk every day I don’t currently have anyone jogging or running unless they like jogging and running and they are joggers and Runners and marathon runners who specifically want to do that and this is why I love Phil because there was no run in terms of body composition it offers no benefit so let’s say you jog for an hour maybe you’ll burn 500 calories right but there’s no anabolic response you don’t build any muscle so the second you eat 500 calories or more right back afterwards you net out to zero your body goes back your heart rate comes down it’s good for your heart health but walking also gives you that there are some benefits that increase if you jog more so up to um like 150 minutes of what they call zone two cardio so that’s 77 percent of your heart rate or less and this is getting into the science of it that will increase the likelihood of living longer and having less heart disease so there are some health benefits to it to implementing that but you can get into that same heart Zone by walking uphill or by briskly walking to be clear it doesn’t specifically have to be a jog but for some people it’s easier to jog and they enjoy it so that’s fine 150 minutes per week of Zone 2 cardio that’s where you get all the benefits for your heart after that there’s nothing but again it can be achieved by walking quickly I’m not talking like saunter with your head down and looking at the leaves but like the bus is coming in four minutes and if you walk real quick you’ll make it that level so anything past that is down to personal preference I think I think people don’t realize if you have a good structured program there’s a lot more personal freedom than you think you don’t have to do certain diet X you don’t have to lift a certain way what you have to do is lift heavy [ ] and challenge your body you want it to grow muscle and burn fat but if you’re keeping your calories at maintenance and you’re not overeating even if you’re this skinny dainty petite woman who enjoys their figure and doesn’t want to get bulky it’s just science if you don’t eat more calories than you need you will get stronger and Tighter and more toned you will not gain any size you will not get bulky unless you’re specifically eating more to do that now some people do it on purpose they want to bulk up other people what happens is they start lifting and training hard and then without realizing it subconsciously they start to eat more because their body wants them to grow but if you just lightly keep track of that I mean when I trained Sarah she had only done I want to say like Tracy Anderson and things like that before yeah and she was she was terrified this was like Person of Interest and then sex life was coming up after and then Black Adam and all these things she’s like I don’t want to get bulky Phil and then I mean when she did sex life fully you can see everything and she was squatting 150 pounds she was bench pressing 95 pounds like she got strong and she was like oh my God she could do full chin-ups she was like oh wow I didn’t realize I could have both that I could be like feminine and cute but also like [ ] strong and I have videos of her doing push-ups and squats with chains on her she felt badass and like maybe that’s not her favorite style of training but she’s like I’ll be damned if it didn’t give me the best body and it worked and I didn’t get bulky or gain any pounds because she was just good at eating healthy food and the right amount of calories are you I mean this is not what you said so I don’t want to put words in your mouth but like is the only way to that level I guess you’re you’re implying that like you have to have massive amounts of of weight uh is that true like is there like a lightweight you know or body weight thing that does build muscle yeah so the evidence on this is it changed it used everyone used to say you have to do like eight to Fifteen reps and that’s what’s called hypertrophy that’s like the muscle building phase they’ve now shown that anything between 1 and 30 rep apps where you’re achieving failure so like if you can do more than 30 and you’re not even remotely tired you’re into the endurance zone so it’s healthy you might feel good again you’re getting benefits but in terms of like the burning body fat building muscle and elevating your physique one to Thirty is the same so if you do three sets of ten and ten means like that’s the max you can do that’s how hard you have to push yourself so let’s say you do three sets of 10 at 20 pounds on something and somebody else says oh I don’t like lifting heavy I want to do three sets of 20 at five pounds so it’s more reps but it’s lighter right as long as that five pounds brings you to what’s called failure like when you get to rep 20 you’re like I am done like maybe you could do 21 or 22 but certainly not 25 or 30 or 40. then that’s fine so you don’t have to be there lifting like hundreds of pounds and be in this badass but on the other end you can do that and also not bulk up if you’re like a woman or a man who’s worried about that not going to happen so all that matters is you go to near failure which means you’re pushing yourself that any weight between 1 and 30 reps when you get there for a certain amount of sets and Reps the easiest way and people I guess still want to take notes but like every body part chest arms shoulders legs butt lower back whatever every week try to get about 15 sets of exercise per body part and try to get 10 to 30 reps of those things where you’re going to failure and for the most part if you do that you’re going to see the results you want pretty Progressive and linearly okay that that makes a lot of sense that’s that’s the best broad answer I can get obviously that’s why individualized training people will come to me and I do all that stuff but like if you’re like I don’t know anything and I have no budget whatever lift heavy [ ] or lift light [ ] the important thing is to get to that failure point where it’s hard and your body can’t do it and you have to get better so if you do five pounds for three weeks and then you notice it’s light well that’s because your body got stronger now you got to do seven and a half got to do ten you have to always be progressing in either reps or weight or increasing the Reps yeah yeah otherwise the that’s why people Plateau if I say hey what’s your workout and if your workout is the same now as it was six months ago and nothing’s changed no wonder you’re not seeing results people when I’m working out four days a week has it changed no no [ ] your body’s used to it so go heavier or go more reps okay Phil so we started the conversation at nipples I feel like it’s only fair to bring it right back around to nipples oh I have I have the best one nipples yeah you no I have okay nipples I know I have a good story about this after but you tell me whole territory I’m in like we got a question about boobs that I said but um yeah yeah you you do you do yours and then I’ll do you show you mine okay um this is from Cordelia who is 35 and she says I went up three cup sizes when I gained 40 pounds is there any way any possible way to lose the weight everywhere except my cups God bless you Cordelia yeah yeah yeah I know oh if only same thing with like milk boobs or pregnancy boobs listen everybody appreciates good breasts however no there there is no way other than surgery there’s no way to choose where the body fat goes so uh unfortunately Cordelia no wow cordelia’s gonna hate you I forget who one of my clients one of my clients she was hilarious I’ve had a few clients get breast reductions and I’ve had a few get breast enhancements and they’re like man couldn’t we just like venmo some titty like you need some I have some can you just trade yeah I was just like a fly on the wall just cracking up with them joking about them you could have helped facilitate that transaction yeah I could be a broke I could be a broker well wait what was the other nipple thing that you wanted to say well no this is not the nipple thing this is just like talk about an awkward moment because I know that comes at this in mind so guys this is a good Trend Phil I love this transition this is great I have never to be clear I have never trained Sydney Sweeney of euphoria but she was my kids babysitter for four years before she was famous wow and she is kind and lovely and wonderful and was she a good babysitter she was the best babysitter she was the valedictorian she was studying while she was doing auditions watching the kids so we were like dude this girl’s gonna be famous because she was so kind and responsible and respectful but now she’s known for like the best hits in Hollywood we can’t watch the show because we can’t watch our babysitter get real yeah oh no failed these words and she still she’ll call my she’ll call my kids on their birthday like I have two daughters and she’d be like happy birthday and we’re like hopefully they never see you for it yeah no no we’re chill about that but like she’s just so kind and good and a sweet person and there’s been all this Internet Hate under Lily I’m like I’m gonna bring up the fact that she is a good person and just like a badass and good for her for being hot good for her yeah I love to hear that she was valedictorian you know Stevie and I have don’t bring me anything backgrounds here so we’d love to hear yeah her parents were very strict they were like we’ll help you act and go to auditions but you have to keep your grades up and do this and like she was getting guest stars and shows when she was 14 15 but she was still babysitting like we just she was not even on the cusp of Fame we were just so impressed with how it look wrong this is a good kid and like yeah it doesn’t it all surprise us and then she’s up there now and still will say happy birthday to get you some babysit them in seven years like it’s just been notable how it doesn’t surprise me in the least that aside from her looks anything she she’s successful mostly because she works hard and I’ll feel like she gets credit for that I love that you’re crediting like a good work work ethic and like uh you know good head on your shoulders with being famous I think that’s that’s really nice but I’m glad to hear that she has it and I also feel like that you thought you know what the Right audience the widest audience for me to defend Sydney Sweeney is gonna be best friends back all right do we look does our audience seem like a group of haters maybe sweetie haters hate Sydney no I just got off somebody else like because she posted a thing and one of her family was a trump people or whatever I’m like yeah everyone’s got a crazy uncle everyone’s got a weirdo believe me yeah like and also like even if he was not crazy and politically that way like she’s her own person like people if we get judged by who is around us we’re all screwed yeah well you know I think you have a certain level of Fame you get judged for literally [ ] everything so totally yeah and like you could have used some more caution but I posted something I’m like oh I didn’t realize there was that in the background oh my gosh like I didn’t know yeah that giant dildo yeah yeah it feels like yeah well this is a perfect segue this Awkward Moment really segues us into my Awkward Moment of the week that Phil we usually have our guests like leave at this point but I think I think you you will have something to contribute here get in the Hall of Fame so I um I went to the gym and all right this is this happened like a few weeks ago when I was new to this particular gym I was going to so it’s it’s a really big I was still trying to kind of find my way through it and I I don’t know if you’re like this or anybody that’s listening that goes to gyms it can be a pretty intimidating environment yeah especially when it’s large you know like there’s just there are people throwing weights around there are big dudes there are people posturing and so like I kind of keep my eyes down when I’m at the gym find my way to my to my bench and I’m working out for like half an hour and I noticed this guy keeps looking over I’m getting annoyed because I’m just like I made it here I’m proud of myself for being here like I do not need any other distractions keeps looking over and eventually he comes over and he says how long have you been working out I’m like oh God you’re a guy this [ ] guy like oh you know a while no but really how long have you been working out and then I’m like okay well accurately it’s been about you know a year with Phil I’ve been working out for a year he’s like wow no way that’s awesome and I’m like okay I’m going to get continue to continue continue my routine yeah have a good day he walks away then I go to another side of the gym and I’m doing my sit-ups or my planks at this point he comes over into in the middle of my plank he’s like hey I meant to say this earlier but like can I get your number and I stop my plank I pause my timer and I get up and I’m like hey I’m not interested and I’m also married oh I’m so sorry I’m so sorry uh this always happens to me he says it’s like wow he’s got a time he’s gotta type and he walks away and I just I try to let things kind of just you know run off my back what’s the term like just kind of move on with it but I I was so angry and maybe it was like all the endorphins from working out but I was really I just got so frustrated that he interrupted me twice during my workout and hit on me and this and and I felt like in this environment that I am already a little bit less comfortable and they’re they’re almost only men around right I don’t even I think at one point there was like one other woman there but it annoyed me that he just felt like he could ask for my number there and my question is what the [ ] man Phil I feel like this what do you have to say for yourself oh man on behalf of all this is the thing right like this is why women’s gyms exist it’s like just to be aware of the male gaze or just the opposite sex right maybe men feel this way about women hitting on them in the gym I don’t know no they would be so lucky yeah uh what’s I feel like so many people I don’t know if it’s social media and Technology people got no game anymore like I’m okay with public flirting but like it means like you’re looking at him he’s looking at you he’s you’re looking maybe you go to the water fountain and then like three sessions later maybe there’s a quiet wave and like there’s like that whole cute building like give me some tension give me some romance and then maybe right like right for him to like it’s so obvious your eyes are down you have music and like for anybody to do that to anybody’s disrespectful of the fact that they’re very they’re very clear you were showing close body language I’m not open to this yeah and here’s just like I don’t care how you feel or how you present here’s what I want yeah and so I think I think a lot of people are are like ignorant [ ] like they’re not trying maybe he was trying to be but a lot of people are dicks and they don’t know it yeah what about a plank says come on I think it honestly says like I don’t value what you’re doing like it it basically is like you my perception of you is that you are here for me to hit on and for me to notice yeah like I have access yeah and as a woman your workout is just a silly little thing that you’re doing I don’t value what you’re doing and you know because I don’t see I don’t see that as valuable to you so I think it shows like just an extreme ignorance and like uh uh you know self-absorbed uh mentality totally self-absorbed just like it’s your space he went in your space it’s my space and and then there were two things I noticed I didn’t have my wedding ring on because I don’t wear it when I’m lifting weights it’s going to mess up my ring so I’m like okay but then I’m like why should I have a signal right and also probably what is the color that much honestly it may not have mattered and then this is the thing that I think really could have protected me headphones if I had headphones in I feel like that helps give off the I can’t hear you I can’t see you maybe energy maybe yes to both but I’d say like you shouldn’t have to yeah need to have that you should just be of course but yeah of course I shouldn’t but this shit’s gonna happen right again unfortunately we’re on bfba we aren’t solving solving the problem Sydney sweetie there we go like weekend I’ll get weird advances from all sorts of people but I also probably don’t ever have to deal with the fact of being scared like I’m bigger than anybody who’s gonna come I I mean I’ve been described as the outsides of grizzly bear on the insides of a Japanese anime girl however they don’t know that until they meet me and so I’ve been you know proposed let’s figure it out pretty quickly every type of gender and like women I thought were like Good married women and gay guys and everybody I went on a gay date by accident once because I was just hanging out with a guy I didn’t realize and I’m not gay but that’s fine but like I’m just down with whatever a chill guy but but I don’t have that fear that anything could go wrong because the likelihood of them overpowering or drugging or what you know yeah and it’s a whole different world for you but the point is people should just respect your space you didn’t invite him over to come over bro yeah I will say though nikkien like we’ve gone through many an awkward situation in your life you have a tendency to um not want to not that you’re adverse to confrontation but you you typically don’t have like a short fuse you try it’s too nice yeah you indirectly like you know push the conversation another Direction you’re trying not to hurt anyone’s feelings I say I don’t want that person to be up to you though for the way that you acted in this situation just saying like I’m not interested I’m married and leave me alone I like I think that that’s the that’s the silver lining of this whole situation is that like yeah it’s unfortunate you are approached you know why you were approached but the fact that you were just like uh [ ] off and I don’t care if it hurts your feelings I think is says I wish I had said well I mean by not saying [ ] off you didn’t instigate like an aggressive situation so I think it’s great that you didn’t say [ ] off and you said I’m not interested because that’s his secret would have been there to do it for you yeah yeah the next time I went to the gym I force Zach to come with me and I was like we’re gonna walk around to all this place all the places this guy could be and I need to I want him to see us together can I tell you something I have never seen him again in my life great that is because Zach walked around with you and he was very intimidating that’s exactly yeah yeah he saw Zach from afar and he was like well never gonna never gonna come back yeah thank you Phil for joining us this week thank you guys thank you so much I had a blast if people want to follow you or learn more about you where can they go so my social media for everything’s trained by Phil but I’m 99 on Instagram like I have a tick tock a Twitter whatever I I respond on Instagram on Instagram it’s age-appropriate yeah yeah trained by Phil yeah and uh Phil at trained by phil.com trained by phil.com but Instagram’s where you get to find my content my stuff I respond to you um and I’m I’m pretty active on it yeah well I I learned a lot today and I might play this back and take notes because I was you know too preoccupied to actually write down on notes this time but like this has been extremely helpful so thank you again for uh yeah thank you guys my pleasure yeah you are a wealth of knowledge Phil thank you for coming so great I appreciate you too bye guys bye see ya and thank you for listening to best friends back all right you can catch brand new episodes every Friday make sure to follow so you don’t miss an episode if you’re enjoying the podcast leave us a review you can follow at mythical pods on Tick Tock for Clips to share with family and friends you can follow me everywhere at Nadine and stevieveware at Stevie W Levine and of course you can hear me every Monday through Friday on Good Mythical Morning with red Link at youtube.com good mythical morning I’ll see you there the holiday season is fast approaching so what better way to get your friends and family together than by playing we’re still good developed with our friends at Spin Master we’re still good as a hilariously entertaining game that laughs in the face of disaster just fill in the blank with the best words to create ridiculous disasters and then compete to write the most positive spin for that terrible situation don’t worry we’re still good pick up your copy of we’re still good at mythical.com mythical.com mythical.com mythical.com mythical.com mythical.com