ramble [Music] [Applause] [Music] this is dispatches from myrtle beach with charles neal and link neal my son and we’re gonna swing right on into the show and it’s good to see you son it’s good to see you dad we’re wearing the same shirt today different versions of the same shirt but yeah same color we’re like getting pretty close yeah we’re on the same wavelength well that don’t surprise me any we we we get on a link once in a while and we don’t know where we’re going so oh where are we going today what’s new in myrtle beach well it’s been raining out here a lot been raining a lot so in between all that and everything then it gets hot and then it gets you know rain some more but i’ve been having to cut the grass about twice a week so you know that ain’t a whole lot of fun but everything’s going pretty good here yeah see i miss cutting grass it was kind of like me time where i could just kind of zone out and think about whatever i wanted to think about when you’re mowing grass what do you think about getting done just getting done yeah getting through yeah your mind doesn’t wander well it wonders some but you know i’m pretty particular about the way i cut grass and how it’s going and how it looks i keep it in a straight line when i mow and so it looks good going back and forth and everything so so you’re just thinking about the mowing of the grass yeah very focused yeah i don’t want to get my foot cut up on under the lawnmower and get it cut do something stupid so you know i kind of watch what i’m doing okay but been a pretty good pretty good week since we talked the last time so you know things are going good i had a girl to recognize i had one day when it was raining i had one of our one of your good mythical morning jackets on it’s kind of like it’s happened before but i was walking in the food line and before i could get in this girl uh walked up behind me and said do you watch that show and i turned around and she said oh my god she said i reckon you do watch it i said why do you think that she said you’re link’s dead i said that would be correct yes so she was running around she said well have you got time to wait i got to run back to my car and get my camera i’d like to take a picture with you so when she come back where did you wait did you keep shopping or did you just stand there no we was outside we never made it in the food line yet neither one of us we were outside so she uh ran back and got her phone and camera and stuff and she was we took a couple pictures and then she said hold on just a second and she was calling somebody in and facetiming them and said look who i’m standing here with and and showed them and i really did it so people would believe it but she was pretty excited have you gotten people talking to you about this show do any of your friends or anybody around there listen to this podcast well i’ve had three or four people that let me know and then i had a i want to give a shout out to uh jacob rice oh is it is this a holler out or a shout out because i know you’ve got you could do either one well holler or shout out but i’m shouting out to jacob rice because he he sent he sent me a song to dance with with me and nancy and uh wanted me to listen to it thought and to see if it was a good shagging song really me and nancy was sitting downstairs and at the house up under the house and i said uh i’m gonna play this song nancy let’s listen to it and see how good it is and everything and so i started playing it and man jacob you did a good job i’m going to tell you this is a good song you i i think it might go somewhere but while i was playing it nancy was just a shagging and a dancing by herself so i said i’m gonna send jacob a thing and said we’re gonna do a facetime listening to his song his rock that he wrote and we’re gonna dance to it and send him a copy of it so you sent him a personalized shagging video not yet we had time but we’re gonna send it to him in the next day or two we’ve been pretty busy with people that’s that’s full service i mean this is almost like a cameo you know what you know what cameo is yeah what is it yeah it’s when you when you do a little uh spot for some kind of like somebody just wrote a song or do something and doing a little spot for it to promote it and everything so well it’s it’s all it’s also an app where people will pay you to make a video for them oh so you’re kind of doing the free version of a cameo well maybe we might have to hold off on that i know no i’m probably no i’m probably going to send it to him if so hey it was a great song i mean a great song did he make the song or just send you a song he wrote the song and sang on it okay yes what’s it called how a man treats a lady you want me to play a little clip of it for you yeah yeah [Music] oh this is this is this is country [Music] it’s jamming [Music] hey girl what you’re doing i’m sitting there making the move but i know that uh-huh okay wow we’ll even want more that’s a shagalicious clip right there yep so the emails are still pouring in yeah they’re still coming in yeah it’s kind of surprising but it’s really good right it’s like we said we’re gonna see if we can keep keep this show up in the top three to five i don’t know about doing it with uh what was that uh rogan rogan yeah you haven’t heard from him yet no i ain’t heard from him yeah but uh keep your door locked yeah well i ain’t worried about that okay it’s time for another edition of myrtle beach mailbag i got one from mitch lang and it says what did the police say to the nursing baby i don’t know what you’re under a breast i mean you’re cut under i mean i don’t know if you’re under it as much as you’re just on it but i guess you have to say yeah that one’s kind of that one didn’t quite line up for me you know if the baby’s under the breast is the baby missing the breast well you know sometimes when women have them things kind of hang down and they’re kind of up under it when they’re nursing so you know he they might be up under okay you know what i guess you’re right okay i got another one from victoria cacos i hope i pronounced that right victoria says who’s the most popular guy at a nudist colony now i’ve been to it i’ve been to uh i wouldn’t call it a well it was kind of a nudist colony i went camping out at death valley and there was this there was these springs and there were people who had pulled their rvs and you know they were like semi-permanently living out there in the middle of nowhere but there’s you know there’s water coming up in the spring so like it’s a good place to gather and a lot of them were just buck naked so i tried my hand at that you know i got in the hot spring i took a shower it’s nice after a couple of days of camping but i don’t know if i could be a permanent resident you ever been to a nudist camp yes really yeah i went to jamaica one time and the resort we were staying in there was a nudist colony right beside of it and me and my friend just walked around the side of it before we walked around there we just took our bathing suits off and just dropped them down on the rocks and walked around just walked right on up through there like we knew what we was doing you had so you stripped down naked and just blended in just blended right on in yeah well what were they doing they were laying on the beach and some of them was in the pools and it was just kind of a kind of a pretty relaxing atmosphere it’s almost like okay yeah you’re laying on the beach you’re sunbathing you’re in like vacation mode but the thing that starts to trouble me is when you think about like oh i’m i’m making dinner and i’m still totally naked or i’m trying to fix a flat tire on my car and i’m still totally naked you know that’s when that’s when it starts to be a rub sometimes literally you know don’t fry bacon naked you know no that ain’t a good idea but that’s what they do how do they fry their bacon from a distance i guess a shield yeah i guess so did you talk to anybody when you were in in nudist jamaica did you just walk around and golf we did yeah we just walked around and looked that’s been uh that was in 1984. oh so you said it was a friend of yours like a guy friend yeah so like you get naked with your guy friend and you’re just walking around that wasn’t weird well no but he was my first cousin so you know it didn’t make no difference so you know no it didn’t didn’t bother me none i went through basic training and stuff in the army i’ve seen a lot of men naked so you know don’t bother me to see so well you know it’s it’s something that you’ve been through a little bit so there is something freeing about it like could you see yourself like going back joining a nudist colony well i could probably join one it probably wouldn’t bother me i know i could totally i could totally see you doing it yeah not that i would want to see you doing it but i can imagine that you would be open to it yeah it’s pretty freeing feeling yeah it sure is yeah i’m dodging the question yeah yes you are well this guy said the guy who can carry a cup of coffee in each hand and a dozen donuts i forgot the question though who’s the most popular guy in nudist colony yeah a guy who can carry a cup of coffee in each hand and a dozen donuts i don’t get it you don’t get it i honestly i don’t get it hey he must have a big enough thing hanging between his legs and he’d put a dozen doughnuts up on him oh that’s what you mean yeah he’s got a cup of coffee in both hands and a yeah a dozen doughnut a doughnut hole ain’t won’t fit i don’t think he it’ll fit up his arm so it had to be somewhere else he was put thank you for explaining it dad now that i have like a like a crystallized image of this in my mind well i got another email from james lee and it says what do you call it when your snake don’t work um i don’t know a reptile dysfunction you know what there’s medication for that i’ve been told that you can take a viagra and just like i mean i had someone recommend it to me i’m just going to be honest you ever tried it pretty often so you recommend it yeah i’d recommend it so i’m 44. and i like i start to get you know it’s like this is just between you and me i’m i’m actually at what point am i gonna need am i gonna need a little bit of assistance like that you know maybe about four or five years ago for me and then i mean is it true that it like it could last for like 24 hours no i mean what how long is it supposed to last probably about an hour like without any other type of stimulus would it just it just works all of a sudden you got a woody like or d you still got an you gotta you got to have some sort of stimulus you got to have some stills and it takes about 30 minutes for it to take hole and it still takes a little arousement from your partner to make it work good too okay if you start taking it and you don’t need it then it just makes it makes it where you can’t get rid of an erection i think i’m not a doctor i’m just a guy with an erection well not currently most of the time you you know that you’re gonna be using it so that’s when you take it you don’t just take one on a whim yeah just gamble hope something comes together you can’t you got to make more concrete plans if you want to you know if the concrete’s going to set you need to have concrete plans that’s correct but then you know typically in like the normal way that it works when it’s you know when it’s over it’s just kind of over like elvis has left the building so to speak but when you take viagra once um your elvis leaves the building does it is there still like a it pretty much leads to building too okay it’s just something that’s like taking medicine that like when you’re sick that helps you get better it helps you get better sometimes helps your weiner get better yeah that’s right ain’t no shame in a little e.d just do something about it you know that’s another potential sponsor yeah that’s right [Music] custom inc can help you recognize employees show customer appreciation and outfit your teams with your favorite products and brands customized with your logo at customink.com you can easily make your mark on all sorts of products including water bottles backpacks polos jackets and so much more make custom ink your go-to custom gear partner with great customer service quality products and all-in pricing along with personalized help when you need it and an easy to use website when you don’t all backed by a 100 satisfaction guarantee go to customink.com to get started today and then i got a email from i think ronan easing he said do you think you could eat 10 chili dogs in one city why or why not if not how many chopped chili dogs could you eat in one sitting what is this guy’s deal he won’t know how many chili dogs you can eat in a sitting okay all right no questions a bad question no well if i when i was about 30 i could probably eat five or six i couldn’t eat ten but you know two or three right now is about my maximum of course i’m not just eating a chili dog i’m eating a hot dog with chili and onions and uh mustard mayonnaise and slaw and that’s right all that stuff on you gotta do it carolina style i’m telling we go all the way with slaw and chili i got a friend of mine when we invite invite him over and i’m having hamburgers and hot dogs he put his he puts his slaw on his plate by itself he don’t he won’t put it on his hot dog i thought michael what’s wrong with you that’s right and hey but he’s from ohio so he says i just want my chili dog with onions that’s all i want poor guy from ohio he’s missing out so you couldn’t talk him into a carolina style dog and i’ve known him about four or five years now they hadn’t been able to get him to put it on there yet come on michael what’s wrong with you just try it it’s the best and on a cheeseburger too got that carolina style i’m telling it’s the best all that juice running down your hand and everything while you’re eating it boy it makes it good i’m telling you oh yeah i got another email from amelia but z it says i i’d love for you to read off this list of words so then she gave you a list of words yeah okay i think i know what’s happening here yeah they they want me to ev what a word sounds like in my southern slang i guess that’s what they want to see okay let’s hear them the first word is pecan hold on now the first word is pecan pecan either one pecan pecan don’t say pecan i have never heard you say pecan i’m i’m just sitting here reading he’s like you know sometimes when your brain sees something you say it different than you do okay it just runs through your brain you you got to read it then you got to think you look away from the page and let it run through your brain and say it like say it real the can that’s not it you said pecan that’s that’s not even nobody says it that way dad pecan you said pecan then you said pecan yeah what do you actually say though i thought i said pecan you don’t say pecan pecan no pecan you say pecan pecan so which one do you say pecan i guess i don’t you know i think that’s what i said they they really thrown you for a loop yeah the next one is uh caramel i think that is how i say it as opposed to caramel right now if it’s before the word apple how do you say it caramel apple right but then if it’s just the word is by itself like oh this thing is slathered in caramel no i think you say caramel right yeah the first one yeah well yeah this is really confusing you and then you’re confusing i’m telling you and uh the next one is route route yeah r-o-u-t root some people say root i think i say route syrup so you say syrup or syrup syrup okay i think i say syrup and the next one is coupon yeah that’s how i say it coupon coupon i don’t know how else you would say that even in southern you just say coupon right egg yolk okay keep going monday you know what while you’re at it just say every day of the week i don’t know give them a bonus tuesday wednesday thursday friday saturday sunday yep there’s all of them and then i got another one from megan walden it says what did the elephant say to the naked man oh man see this is the theme i like you’ve themed this episode with nudity yeah i reckon so that’s that uh something about the trunk i don’t know dang man how do you breathe through that thing okay that’s a wiener joke well you got to take the right medication right yep it’ll start breathing it’ll perk up and breathe boy for about an hour that’s right yep now it’s time for a word from our sponsor i got a sponsor from plant seafood at 108 c c mountain highway number one north myrtle beach south carolina 29582 is eugene plattseafood.com and this is a wonderful place i’m telling you you can go in there and you can buy fresh seafood and carrot home and cook it yourself or you can go in there and they’ll cook it shrimp for you fish just all kind of put old bay seasoning on it and i mean it’s some kind of good and it’s pretty you don’t have to worry about going home cooking stuff and they don’t even charge you anything to cook it if you buy it from them so that that’s a wonderful thing and then they got a grill right on the other side of it over where you can order a like a seafood platter or flounder or shrimp or oysters all different kind of seafood and you come in and get it and it’s reasonably priced and just come on you can come by plants and get you some good seafood either get it there to eat and carrot home or carrot home cook it yourself so just come on by here at plattson uh get you some seafood promise that’s a good ad dad i i just love your ads it makes it hungry for some seafood yeah well i’ve been getting a lot of emails asking for my advice so we’re going to try to go over some of them see if i can give you what my advice is to help you out with these things oh so uh a dedicated advice segment yep that’s what we we’ve been kind of doing that some and people been writing in and asking so let’s see where that goes and what it does all right it’s time for our first edition of i’ll help you get out of the woods paul garcia asks when you’re in trouble with your spouse aka in the dog house what’s the best way to get out of it okay do you have experience in the doghouse dad um probably at least twice okay all right yeah yeah the best way to to get out the doghouse with your spouse is to try to you might want to go buy her some flowers and then sometimes that blows up in your face they don’t want new flowers yeah they want you to just leave them along a little bit and let them calm down and then you go and just try to apologize to them and say honey you know i’m wrong i i want to apologize you know how much i love you and you know and sometimes my mouth just stuff comes out of it that i wish it had to come by but i can’t take it back but i do apologize and and you got to be sincere with this you just can’t be doing it off the cuff you got to be sincere when you’re apologizing about it too you got to think through what you’re sorry for and maybe then you just need to just leave them along a little bit you might want to reach up there and give them a little smooch on the cheek and you know i am sorry honey and just just going about your business and see how they react and see what goes on so going for that smooch too early could be problematic especially early on in me and christy’s marriage we had to figure out how how to fight properly you know how that was effective for both of us because for me whenever i would get in the doghouse the main thing i’d want to do is get out of the doghouse as quickly as possible like i would be like let’s let’s resolve this right now i would be chasing christy around the house but getting a little space and a little time definitely is what christy would always want because she started to explain it to me listen i just need some time to process this i’m not you’re you’re forcing me to give you an answer and you just want to resolve this you want to you want to resolve all the feelings of tension of being in conflict but i need a little time because for me it’s like okay i now that i’ve realized that i’ve screwed up last i just want to i want to move past it i want to i want to resolve it and it’s well i don’t have the luxury of being able to do it on my timeline especially when it’s my fault you’re going to have to wait and let them come on in and and do it when they want to be apologized to you kind of have to be careful as you get older you learn sometimes just to keep your mouth shut and not say nothing you don’t get in the dog house but sometimes that’s hard i’m telling you i mean i just feel like if i charted all the times i’ve been in the doghouse versus how many times christy’s been in the doghouse i just don’t understand why it’s like 20 to one like what what’s what’s going on here you know i’d love to be able to say well i’m i’m just not as sensitive as you are i just let things go and then you know what that does it puts me back in the doghouse again for trying to say that i never put her in a dog house here i am back in the doghouse should have kept my mouth shut sometimes we just let our mouth overload our ass and that’s just the way it works out and so you need to learn to just keep your mouth shut and just leave it alone we let our mouth overload our ass yep that’s right yeah that worked okay i mean you talk too much say it and talk too much you just need to leave it alone that’s from about 40 years of experience with several different wives for me and sometimes i didn’t get out of the doghouse but i do i do pretty good getting out of it now because i don’t talk as much as i used to i just listen yeah yeah when in doubt listen and i got a another one from uh paxton graham he says my ex and i broke up after five years and he got a new girlfriend pretty quick he told me that she reminds him of me what the heck does that mean man sounds like to me that he probably has still some feelings for you but he’s done moved on and he and it might be a small compliment that this girl that he’s with now it kind of looks like you so he likes the way people that women that look like you that’s the kind of woman that he’s attracted to see but i think once you break up like apparently they’re trying to be friends because they’re still talking but that seems like the last thing that you want to talk about is your new dating relationship especially oh she reminds me of you that just it all just seems weird to me like i was whenever i would get done like break up with somebody i always felt like well i don’t know if we can be friends you know it’s like we were romantically involved i just can’t i i don’t know what would be behind that statement yeah you’re right it’s like what’s the point what’s the point in telling her that when i was dating and had girlfriends and different things when if one broke up with me or i broke up with them i just left them along and i just went on to the next one i i i went into this calling them back and trying to get back in their good graces if they didn’t want me i just wouldn’t found me another one so that’s my advice just leave them alone go find you somebody that would really like you and respect you and take care of you for real and maybe maybe before paxton hits the road she says well you know what i’ll i’ma find somebody who doesn’t remind me of you yeah cause i’m moving on thank you next yeah [Music] okay i i think we’ve had a pretty good day today and i hope uh everybody tunes in and keeps listening and all you have to do is uh look on the ratherbeastshaggin53 at aol.com and send me some more messages and do all that those things and we want to try to keep this show on up in the top five or six you just keep chasing those numbers now aren’t you yeah i like that yeah he’s hey he’s giving advice he’s saying words that you want him to say you know dropping knowledge dropping science granddaddy’s style okay and i got another thing i want to tell you about that’s going on too said before we end this show today i want to tell you about a exciting upcoming series from the podcast a hot dog is a sandwich yes in a special five part podcast series josh and nicole will finally end the debate once and for all is a hot dog a sandwich they’ll examine every angle of the possible answers by consulting one expert guest per episode each of whom will provide a key piece to unlocking this meaty puzzle box culminating in a live show spectacular that will weigh all of the information and finally declare if the hot dog is a sandwich are you intrigued dad yeah this is a great promotion for our hot dog as a sandwich podcast i appreciate you doing this well just trying to help it says this series is out now and it’s running until wednesday august the 10th be sure to check out every episode by following a hot dog is a sandwich on apple podcast spotify or wherever you get your podcast all right see y’all next week because we’re gonna be swinging that was it that was the plug are you gonna let well hold on are you gonna listen to it yeah i’m gonna listen to it and see what’s going on with it you know i don’t think a hot dog’s a sandwich hot dogs on a bun maybe your mind will be changed if you actually listen i’m a little suspicious if you’re gonna listen yeah i’m i’m probably a little suspicious to you yeah that you’re gonna listen right that’s okay but we want y’all to just keep right on listening and i’m still swinging down here at uh myrtle beach and swinging around and if you want to just uh find out what’s going on with us just keep looking at looking for us on dispatches from myrtle beach and come on and enjoy us next thursday when we’re on again i can’t wait personally we’re gonna keep trying to have a good time and swing this world around just like we do when we’re dancing all right thanks dad talk to you next week all right love you love you