(jingle) Welcome to Ear Biscuits, I am Rhett. And I am Link. Today at the round table of dim lighting, we’re gonna fight, no, we’re gonna discuss fights. We’re gonna pick some fights. We’re gonna resolve some fights. We’re gonna discuss all things related to conflict. And, Well, not all things that way. Yeah, that’s very broad. You just made a comprehensive promise. I, well, I made a very broad promise, and I want to retract it. You know my motto. Don’t be comprehensive. Yeah, just be apprehensive. I say that all the time. I’m comprehensively apprehensive. But we’re gonna talk about some ridiculous arguments that you, mythical beast, have gotten into. And, I think we can help solve– Yeah, we’re gonna solve. Some of these riddles, and bring some stasis to some relationships. Now there will not be comprehensive solutions. No. There will be specific solutions to your situation, but let me tell you right now. I can say this factually, confidently, and thoroughly. That we will be giving you solid answers that are morally respectable, easy to act on, and if you do not follow our advice, that is your prerogative. I’m not gonna, I backed off a little bit. I was gonna say that it, you are responsible for your own actions, and you don’t, but that’s true anyway. Sometimes just talking about the specific conflict, and acknowledging it’s existence, makes the elephant disappear. And in the least, we’ll do that. But where did the elephant go after it disappears? The back yard. You still gotta feed that elephant. – [Rhett] It ate a lot. Is it pink? I’m confused. The pink elephant is different than the elephant in the room. The elephant in the room is never pink. What about the one with memory? Different. That’s all, all of them. All! There’s so many different elephant tropes. You know? I bet there’s more. There’s the circus elephants, circus peanuts, elephant. I don’t know what that one is exactly. I don’t understand. You get paid in peanuts. So we’re gonna get into the deep end of some conflict. Mmmhmm, maybe share some of our own conflicts with each other and with our family. But first, you want an update from me? (chuckles) Is that what this is about? I just wondered. Do you want an update from me? ‘Cause I got a big update. Sure. I’d love an update I got, From you. I got a big oh update for you. Christy and Lily went to see Hamilton last night. How in the world did they figure that out? They got tickets. Their friend got tickets. But that’s, you know, that’s like, that’s not easy to do! Well, it was like L.A. Hamilton. It was rip off Hamilton. It wasn’t like Broadway Hamilton. It’s the same people. It’s not the same people. It’s not the same people as the original cast. But, if you go to New York right now, you won’t see the original cast. Right. You won’t see that dude. Lynwell Noreagya. Manwell. Miranda. Miranda. Miranda. Yeah, you won’t sings. He’s gone. He’s done. He’ll probably come back for a farewell thing or something. Oh yeah, he’s been gone man. He did that Moana. Yeah, he checked out. He forgot he even did– So hold on, what you’re telling me is that anything other than the original with him is a rip off? I actually don’t know. But, I think you’re gonna, if you saw him you’re bragging. You’re going around town bragging. I saw Hamilton when Lynn Manwell Miranda was in it. Well yeah, of course. That’s better. But at this point in time, getting into the L.A. show, listen, I know nothing about Broadway, I’ve only been to a couple of shows in my lifetime, you’ve only been to one and it was Lion King– And it was amazing. We talked about that, I was not invited. But this is still quite a feat though. This is still a major life event. Oh, they were super pumped about it. And I was super not invited. Because, I mean, for the past year, they’ve been listening to these Hamilton songs. Like (singing tunes), like you know, all of these Hamilton songs. Is there one with Eliza in it? Yeah, yeah. I just sang part of it. That’s all I know. There’s a lot of rapping. I’d listen to it. I listened through it one time. And let me tell you. Lily is just obsessed with it. Her friends are obsessed with it, that’s why it’s like, playing in the car. And, Christy starts to learn the lyrics. And I just, they’ve really ruined it for me. Oh, wow. Like– Is it that they can’t sing? Well, it’s, I don’t know. Like, they don’t have good rhythm? I’ve never been interested in seeing it because just a bunch of teenagers singing it in a mini van, is not appealing. Just like a 13 year-old girl rapping about Hamilton is not cool to me. I’m sorry, like, if I wanna listen to rap music, I’m gonna listen to Kendrick, man. I’m gonna listen to some good stuff. Well I think what you’re And I just feel like– What you’re– It’s not good. What’s you’re hinting at right here– It’s good for plays. Okay, exactly, okay. Now this is controversial, but I’m on your team. And I just heard it from 14-year-old girls in a minivan. I’m on your team here. So let me just say my opinion on this. And it’s not an informed opinion. Because it’s not like I’ve witnessed a lot of this. But I have listened to the Hamilton sound track. And my opinion on it, is exactly what you’ve said. Is that, if this, if any of these songs just like popped on the radio, you’d be like what is this cheesy stuff? But what is this cheesy rap? And I’m not even talking about because it’s, like, rapping about Alexander Hamilton. But just the approach. Everything about it. Yeah, it’s just kind of shmalting. It’s a musical. It fits in the context of a musical. Now, within the context of a musical, it’s like, incredibly innovative. And I don’t know the– It’s like remarkable. People are growing hair on their hate right now. That’s how some people, we’re getting some people that riled up. Did you write that expression up? Growing hair on your hate? You’ve never heard that? I’ve never heard that until right now. I just made it up (chuckles). Yeah, I figured. But it sounds, but you know what I mean, right? They’re getting so riled up, they’re growing hair on their hate. Yeah, I understand what you mean. They’re gonna have to shave their hate. And we’re not saying, I’m not trying to make any body man, but I know I am. As two men who have not seen Hamilton, and only one of us even has any immediate family members who have seen it, we know that we don’t even seem qualified. I’m just saying that I’ve listened to the music, and I actually think that a person who’s listened to the music and not seen the production, is actually in the best position to judge the music itself. Well, every time I hear it, there’s like teenage girls rapping it. I listen to it by myself, no teenage girl at all. Oh really? Okay. Just me in the car. I feel like I’m the impartial one here. You are, because I’m ramped. And I was like, this is good for a musical. This is excellent for a musical. But if this, if you played Kendrick and then you played that, you’d be like well what is this, what is this cheesy stuff? Right, it’d be like watching a movie, a really good movie, verses watching like a made-for-TV movie. But let me say this. Also at the same time, if Kendrick, if you took a Kendrick song and tried to use it in a musical, it wouldn’t work in a musical. You get what I’m saying? Like, it would not work, don’t say it would work. It wouldn’t work. So actually, I’m talking myself back around, and I realize that Hamilton is the pinnacle of musical music. Now what Christy told me, A little cheesy compared to Kendrick. What Christy told me this morning that was news to me, was that there is no dialog at all. It’s all, it’s all singing. So then, okay, let me think about that, alright? It’s only the music. Really? Really, yeah. They never say anything. Never say anything. And you’re saying everything that they sing can be purchased on the album? So you listen to the entire I don’t know that. Album, you’ve listened to the entire play? I don’t know that. But, she said her and Lily said it was like, life altering amazing for them. And I just can’t– And you know what? It would be for me as well. I’m not gonna speak for you. And maybe it… I guarantee you, if I went to see it in person, and I plan on seeing it in person. I will think it is absolutely amazing. But it is like beer googles. I’m prepared for that. But, you talk about, it’s like play goggles. It’s like theater goggles. Well, it’s like– You know how in the theater they’ve got that thing? That you look through? I have a better analogy, you can finish. You think that it’s good? I think that’s what those things are for. Yeah, that’s not what those things are for. This is, the best analogy is summer camp goggles. Okay, so you’re at summer camp, and you have a limited field of people that you might be attracted to, right? So, you fall in love with this girl at summer camp, and you’re like, Amanda is amazing. Amanda is the most beautiful girl. Can we call her Eliza? Eliza is amazing, she’s the most beautiful girl, she’s so interesting. And then, She likes to work, work, it. Then you see Eliza just in normal life, outside of summer camp, and you’re like I don’t really understand what I saw in Eliza. You saw, you saw what summer camp goggles. That’s exactly what I’m saying. Yeah, but you used the thing about the theater, and that’s not the point. That was a red herring. You really ruined yourself. I didn’t ruin it. I just muddied the waters. But I saved it. Yes, you saved it, thank you. And, and– So that’s what’s happening when you go to a musical. The expectations are set in a certain place. And again, I do not think that if all of a sudden Kendrick came out, and then it would become a concert, and a concert is something that is distinctly different than a Broadway show. Now Greenday did a Broadway show. Never saw it. So I’m curious. With their music? Yeah. With the music like, from Dukie, that you would know? Uh, I think it was American Idiot. I don’t know for sure. Speaking out of school. But, I just, I think if I went there, I’d probably think it was great too. I think, I mean, you know, it’s like, you know, acapella. Oh, you gonna do that? I know, you know what? Since you already hate me, I hate acapella! Oh God. I don’t hate the people. But I hate acapella. Until… Until what? Two weekends ago. Lily was like, we should watch Pitch Perfect. And I forgot it was about acapella. And I was like as long as the whole family can agree on something to watch, this is a victory. Who am I to stand in the way of us all finally agreeing on something? And everyone wanted to watch Pitch Perfect. One of the best movies I’ve ever seen in my life. Oh my God, I mean, Link, you’re loosing all kinds of respect. (laughter) Okay, it wasn’t one of the best. It was a hilarious movie, totally worthy of two sequels. And the first one, of which, we watched the next night. And it was not as good as the first, but it was still pretty great. Listen, a movie all about acapella, and I loved it. To death, man! So, you know what? Maybe I’m wrong. Well, heres’ what I say about acapella. Shout out to Floula he did a great job in Pitch Perfect 2. Yeah he did. Acapella is… It was a well written movie. Acapella, It was very self-deprecating which allowed me to like a movie about acapella. Please continue. Acapella is great in person. Okay? Right? Acapella is like– No, it’s embarrassing. No it’s not. Great acapella is great in person. But when you make the decision to buy the album, I disagree with that, but go ahead. Yeah, but well, that’s because we went to that Google party, and the Google acapella people sang, and it was embarrassing, okay? (laughter) I’m sorry. I’m sorry guys. We are getting smarmy. That was embarrassing. I mean, first of all, when you’re in the midst of like, when you’re like, at a tech company, and you’re in the midst of the kind of people who work at a tech company, being in the acapella group makes you cool. But like, in the regular world, it’s not cool. That’s just a fact. But I respect it. But they just thought so highly of themselves, is my impression. I just thought they thought so highly of themselves they thought they were so good, No, no, no. And it really wasn’t good. You’re misinterpreting the look on their faces thinking highly of themselves, when really they’re trying to hit the notes. They make those faces, No, no, even if, they were setting the songs up. The next one is going to blow your socks off.. They look snooty, but really they’re just trying to get on top of the note (sings a note). No, it was the– Come down on it, don’t be flat. Before and after every song. And they also weren’t as great as they thought they were. But, hold on, if you see Penatonix in person, your heart will explode. I’m telling you right now. I haven’t seen them before. But I have ever reason to believe. I bet you, I bet you, I would think they were great. And I bet you I would think Hamilton was great. Just like I think Pitch Perfect is great. But if I was in a certain mood, maybe if I just put on a Penatonix album, and I realize there are many people who are touched by just listening to it, but I feel like, you’re relating it to the experience of seeing it live. That’s my personal opinion, and maybe– That’s how I perceive it. So, when I experience Hamilton I respect On it’s own, I respect how the sausage was made, but I don’t like the sausage. Yeah, but if you’re at the sausage plant as it is being made, and then they give it to you to taste, it will taste better. It’s just like when you’re camping and everything taste better, context matters, you know what I’m saying? I would gladly go camping with Pentatonix. I would love to do that. In fact, if Pentatonix is listening, if you guys want to go camping with us, we will make it happen. Or just the super fruit guys, just those two. Whoever we can get from Penatonix. We’ll take whoever we can get. And if you guys, They guy who plays the Cello with his mouth. We’ll take him, any day of the week. Yeah, we’ll take one or all or any. All I’m saying is– We will take Monotonix, that’s what we’re saying. If, Guyatonix. You can keep going until you get back to Pentatonix. But if we have a campfire set up and one of you guys starts making noises with your mouth, and the other one starts singing, I’m probably gonna start crying. I’m not kidding. You’re gonna cringe a little first. Be like don’t do this, don’t do this, but then– But if we invite Pentatonix on a camping trip, I think the expectation is they’re gonna sing acapella. They’re gonna bust out. And I will weep openly, unashamedly. But I’m just gonna tell you right now that I’m not going to enjoy the album, that’s just my personal opinion. That’s how I, lots of people do, they sell crap tons of albums. Oh yeah. I know that we’ve made a lot of people upset. And I know that we’re the one who are wrong. But we have to be honest. Right. We have to get it out there to the detriment of our careers. This is where, this is when– Hopefully we haven’t lost any fans. A whole chunk of mythical beasts just sloughed off. That’s what it sounded like when they realize who we really are. (mouth wings flapping noise) I’m sorry we’ve broken any hearts. Like a dead skin cell, except we’re the dead skin cell. Yeah. We’re gonna get into some fights. And also resolving some conflicts for you guys. But first, we’re gonna take a second to let you know that we debuted the bigger, badder, better, even more mythicaler, good mythical morning on the good morning mythical channel. There’s lots of surprises. We’re gonna have a lot of the same stuff that you’ve come to love that will not be replaced, it will be added to. With guests and other jazz, like literally, jazz. Extemporaneous– The jazz conversation. Spontaneous, jazz. Is still happening. I don’t know how much jazz there will be. We’re gonna have Lemonwell Miranda, he’s gonna be a guest, along with Penatonix– That’s also not true. Neither of those things are true at this moment. It doesn’t mean we won’t try. Yeah, and we will, and then what are we gonna do? What are we gonna tell ’em? Oh, when they’re on there? Oh, they’ll never listen to this, hopefully. And if we do get that booked, we will have to delete this podcast. I don’t think we were too harsh on Pentatonix. No, no, no, pretty great. I watched their documentary. I thoroughly enjoyed that. So answer a couple of questions. Number one, is it still free? Yes. Good Mythical Morning is still free, it’s still in the same place that it’s always been, it’s still on the Good Mythical Channel, nothing about your experience of the show is going to change in terms of making it more difficult in terms of for you to get to. It is very simple, you’re going to get more, and we’re throwing even more at the show. So, on a given day, you’re not just gonna be getting one video from us, you’re gonna be getting four, maybe five videos, and we are gonna be bringing in even more people to help, we are gonna have even more games, we’re gonna try to bring back some of the things that you know from our past, more music, even more fun, playing characters and all of that stuff that we’ve done sporadically over the years both on the original Rhett and Link channel and also on Good Mythical Morning. We’re trying to throw more at the show. We know there’s a lot of people who always think that change is bad, in this case, we firmly believe that change is good. We appreciate your support, and we know that we’re gonna get comments about oh this has changed and it’s not good anymore, please be your mythical best in the comments, and let’s steer the conversation in the right way. This is only getting more mythical, and some of you will understand that we know. It’s tough to ask that after we’ve been so unrelentingly– Honest? Scathing about the– No, we weren’t scathing. Okay, good. We said that Pentatonix and Hamilton are the best that either of those genres have to offer. And we’re just, we have an appreciation problem. Maybe we’re the problem. No. I love both of them. And I said I would weep in both of them. I’ve got nothing to hide here. The Good Mythical Morning channel, subscribe if you’re not already subscribed. Let’s get into some fights. There’s a chapter of a book of mythicality called Pick a Fight worth Picking and we tell a number of stories of fights that we got into– I think it’s just called Pick a Fight. I think at one point… The bag says It was called Pick a Fight. Pick a Fight worth Picking that you can learn by reading and applying the chapter. I tell the story in detail that I think I’ve told on Good Mythical Morning, having an altercation at a gas station where I thoroughly embarrassed by entire family in tow in my minivan when some dude let me have it. And, I totally deserved it. And that’s, so that’s detail there. I don’t want to rehash it here. You tell the story of a fight that you wish you would have picked, that you wish you would have stood up for yourself in a dressing room involving a young woman and her father who had a tattoo of like a taloned hawk on his head. Yeah. That was crazy, man. Yeah it was. And you shrunk like the shirt you were trying on, and you regret it to this day. Yeah, wish I could go back. So, we represent two extremes. Like maybe avoiding conflict in your case, to the point of regret, to just diving in head first, I would say mouth first, into an argument, and then regretting it, potentially putting my family in harm’s way. Or at least, Your wife. My wife in harms way, and my kids getting an education on a bunch of new expletives from a guy at a gas station. But we also ask you guys to tell us some conflicts that you’ve been apart of. What was the problem? It was tell us about a dust up that you’ve had that went wrong, or weird, or funny. We got one from Adam Charles Stumpf. At a bar a guy bumped my shoulder, then shoved me saying, “sup bro?” I said loudly, “Do you want a hug?” He did not know how to process and just walked away. He didn’t say sup bro, he said wassup bro? Like, you want to start something? Yeah, he was mad. Wassup? And then he said you want a hug? That was risky. That was risky. That was real risky because that could have been, depends who you say that to. Could have been a bear hug. Or it could have been a punch right in the face. Right. I’m gonna hug my five fingers, make a sandwich. And then I’m gonna knock you. So, you could say that this diffuse the situation because it confused and therefore diffused. But I have to say that Adam, I think you got lucky on this one. I don’t necessarily think that this was a wise call. I think you got lucky my friend. You said it to the right person. You said the wrong thing to the right person. Lillian St. Clair, @findthefish14x, tried to yell at a bad driver after he cut me off. Brain said go ahead be my guest, but her mouth said, go ahead, be my friend. (laughter) You know, sometimes when you’re in that moment of confrontation, it just, the wrong thing comes out if you’re me at least. Yeah right, you can related to that. I mean, the most famous story is I was on the beach with you, and Jessie, and Christy. And Christy was very pregnant at the time. And it was a deep beach. Deep enough to like, for college kids to be playing football behind us. And we were at the shore and we were walking back up. Christy was tired, and she walked back before me. And so I see her, and then all of a sudden, out of no where, as she’s getting to the steps to go back to the hotel, she gets mauled by a shirtless collegiate student who was trying to catch a football. He was like, doing the wide receiver thing, like looking back over his shoulder and just ran, ran right into Christy. Christy falls on the ground, and she’s like pregnant, like ripe. I don’t know if ripe is the correct word to use. About to pop. Like a watermelon. And I ran over there, and I got in the guy’s face. My brain was not engaged, and I was like what are you thinking (chuckle). Oh, I remember. So we got a lot of mileage out of that, what are you thinking? And he was like– And the answer was, I’m thinking I’m playing a football game and your life just walked into the field. Yeah, she walked literally through the middle of a football game. You wouldn’t think if– His response was very apologetic. But he had ever right to, I mean, when a pregnant woman is lying in the dirt, there’s not much else you can do besides just help her, even if the husband is like ranting a little bit, it’s understandable. But, it was, I made it very awkward. And you also didn’t back down. I mean, you did back down, but you, actually you and Christy and it’s interesting ’cause I kind of feel like you are both alike in this way, like, you both got mad– Right, but it was an honest mistake– And you stayed mad. So it wasn’t like you got mad and then you realized how ridiculous it was to be mad, you both got mad, ’cause Christy stood up and said, “Gaw,” and then ya’ll both just walked off and I was just like whoa. Well, it was a scary moment. What is happening right now? So I think that that’s, so I think that’s, your number one mistake was what you said, but your number two mistake was– I held a grudge. Still be mad about it and not see the humor in it until probably like the next day. Like I probably didn’t even say anything about it. Do you realize that guy did nothing wrong at all. Like, he did nothing wrong. How could he have changed his actions to be any different? Like, what would he have done differently, right? I’m not gonna defend myself. No, but I’m just saying, in the moment you had the inability to process that he had no other choice than to do what he did. I was going totally on instinct. And you know what? Sometimes it’s like, “Go ahead, be my friend!” Bambi and Friends says one time my friend got kicked out of a pizza shop at 3am because she punched a guy in the face when he said hamsters are sh (beep). Well, that’s, them is fighting words, man, I guess. Just to clarify, she was defending her hamster’s honor. Oh. He was talking smack (chuckle) about hamsters. I don’t know, punch a guy in the face for that? I wonder how that ended. At a pizza shop. I mean if you’re at a pizza shop at 3am talking about hamsters, you pretty much deserve any situation you get yourself into, I think. You gotta watch, you gotta watch. I mean, you have a time piece. You gotta be vigilant of yourself and your friends. But honestly, I mean– Don’t cross Bambi’s friends. The hamsters, think about how differently this would have gone if he would have said hamsters are the sh (beep). You know, think about how that changes everything. Just simply adding the. Yeah, it would have turned into a high five. Yeah, heck yeah man, hamsters! (chuckles) This next one I want to read is kind of a longer story, but I want to re, just settle in, I want to read it to you ’cause it’s kind of funny and it’s honest. Kasie Rae Phillips says, my mother, who sadly passed away two years ago from cancer loved my husband, even when we started dating. She would tell me constantly that I should marry him after she met him. My husband also has long hair and a long beard, did when we started dating, and he does now. He shaved his beard and cut his hair off when he started looking for a job when he graduated college. He’s was sitting at the kitchen table with me when my mom comes in. She’s polite, she’s southern, and she looks at me and tells me to meet her in the other room across the house. Then her mom starts screaming, well this is her writing, my mom starts screaming at me for cheating on my now husband. Going on about how I’m terrible to do that to him. I simply go, “No mom, that’s him,” which just makes her go insane (chuckles). Claiming she didn’t raise her daughter to be a lying, cheating, harpy. Hm, haven’t heard that before. All brave and serious, she threatens to call him. I gladly hand her my phone and at this point, she’s so disgusted with me. It’s comical to me, I am laughing while she is so angry I am sure she would have buried me. She storms into the kitchen and forces me to come in while she humiliates me. Come in here, right now, in front of this guy who you’re cheating on your husband with, this clean shaven man! And then she, I’m calling him right now. She calls him, his phone rings right there. ‘Cause it’s him. She realizes it. Then she calmly hangs up, sets the phone down, turns around, and walks out of the kitchen (chuckles). I’m in tears laughing explaining to my now husband and he started laughing so hard he started crying. I didn’t see my mom for three days. That one kind of speaks for itself. What speaks for itself. I mean, it almost sounds like a movie scene. It’s almost like this may be from a movie. And, Cassie’s just trying to get us to believe that it happened to her. I don’t know the movie though. It certainly wasn’t in Pitch Perfect 1 or 2. Which I will never forget. Yeah, you recently enjoy. So therefore you know that, hopefully they all reconciled later. Erin Croson, my younger sister and I are best friends, but we fight over the dumbest things, because siblings. Once when I was in high school, we got into a shouting match over something I can’t even recall now. What sticks in my memory, was my breaking point during that particular fight. Emma, my sister, took the pickle she happened to be eating throughout this entire thing, squeezed it, and flicked the juice all over my face. She ran immediately which was wise of her. I’ll get her back one day. It’s always good to bring a pickle to a fight. Yeah, yeah yeah. You know? ‘Cause really, what can go wrong? First of all, it’s hard to hit somebody who’s eating a pickle, ’cause it just feels like it’s gonna be messy. Kinda like a person with glasses. You don’t wanna punch a person with a pickle. Take your glasses off. Take your tie off. Take the pickle out of your mouth. Can you put down the pickle so I can punch you? You don’t want to pickle punch somebody. You don’t want (laughter). You don’t want to catch the pickle instead of the face, too. ‘Cause then you could literally just kill ’em if you hit it hard enough and it goes right down their throat. And that’s not what you’re trying to do when you punch somebody in the face. I mean, you’re not actually trying to kill them. You’re just trying to shake them up a little bit. This reminds me of the story of when I was hanging out at your house and you got into an altercation with your older brother Cole, and evidently you had deodorant in your hand. So, not a pickle, but you tell the story. I always carry deodorant. Like, you have it on your person? Well, as a teenager, very shortly after I realized that certain smell could emit from my underarms, like, I need to be ready at all times. I don’t know if you always– No, I was just at home. I was just at home. And for some reason had deodorant. But, Cole was doing something that he did quite often. And he loved it when he could get one of my friends involved. And so, he was saying that I liked Melissa Hood. Did you? I did not. Did you? I did not. Did you? I did not! I think you did. And so, I don’t remember exactly where this came from, I don’t know why he had pinpointed her as who he was, and it made me mad and I was denying it. And I was there. And then he gets you involved. And so now you’re– He likes or doesn’t he? And you’re like yeah he likes her. You saw where this was going. Yeah, you’re getting irate. And then, were you, did you stay with him? Or were you with me when the deodorant projectile happened? I think I was, I stayed with you. I mean, I didn’t want to have to go home. I was really mad at him and I was chasing him, and he ran into his room. Slammed the door. And just as he slammed the door, this is basically the length of the house because I was throwing it from what my parents used to call it the extra room, to Cole’s room. Across the stairwell. I threw a fast ball and the deodorant just, hit the, You threw it then he slammed the door. And it just– He intercepted the deodorant with the door. And it obliterated the like, antiperspirant slash deodorant, it was white. It was one of those that like, when it hit the door, it burst everywhere. Yeah, it was beautiful. It was like white… That really symbolized my anger at the time. I can see it in my brain now watching it like, a slow mo phantom camera. But I think the moral of the story is, having an object, you don’t want to, like if you’re playing a role-playing game, you don’t go get into a fight before you equip yourself with something. And in real life, that might be a pickle, and it might be deodorant. Don’t pick, you need to look at what someone’s got in their hand before you pick a fight with them, I think is another way to look at it. That’s true if you’re on the other end of it. I mean, you damaged the dry wall in your own bedroom. But that was just out of pure anger over something, I don’t even remember what it was. You punched through the wall? No, I kicked the wall. You kicked the wall? You don’t remember what that was? But it was Cole. I don’t know. I don’t know who it was. It wasn’t me. I was mad about something. We didn’t get into a lot of fights. I mean, I would come over there and you and Cole would get into fights. Like he’d get mad ’cause you took one of his CD’s, or something. Oh yeah, Cole and I fought all the time. And my kids fight all the time, all the time. Like, constantly, but it’s not much of a fight, because it’s a 13-year-old and a 9-year-old. So, it’s not like there’s a, I mean, sometimes it gets a little physical, but it’s Lock over reacting in someway and like pushing Shepherd or something like that. But it’s not anything like where I have to step in. But they get in fights all the time. Yeah, like Lando will find something on the table that’s nasty, and like, he’ll like, it’ll be on his hand, and then instead of rubbing it on the napkin, he’ll rub it on Lily or Lincoln, and then they will explode. And then they’ll grab him and pin him down. So does he do this to… He’s instigating? It’s almost like, just, instinctive. That’s hilarious. There’s so much at each other’s throats, he’s not, he’s not sly about it like hmm, I’m gonna do this. I gotcha. It’s more just like– He finds himself doing it. He finds himself doing the most annoying thing to his siblings. Oh that would make me so mad. Yeah, and then they’ll do stuff back to each other. You didn’t have to worry about this as an only child. No, I was a brooding, lonely, only child that like, meticulously posed my G.I. Joe figures and wouldn’t let anyone come over and touch them. Did you fight your, like, step-siblings. Well, okay. So Amy who is like four years older than me? I would like passive aggressively judge her. But I wouldn’t actually get in fights with her. Like, I remember criticizing her to my mom about how she would leave a stead dried up stream of toothpaste on her sink. I disapproved of that. But there was no physical, I mean usually it’s going to be two boys or two girls, and usually two boys are the ones that are going to physically fight. And it’s like we had this, I don’t think we really considered each other siblings. We considered each other house mates. Like, okay, you’re Jimmy’s daughter who’s my step dad, but you’re not my sister. It was weird. And I think she treated me the same way. It was like we tolerated each other, as if we both were like we lived in, like, adjacent rooms of a hotel. Like, neighbors. When’s the last time you talked to her? I don’t, since Jimmy and mom got divorced, I don’t think I ever talked to her again, so like third grade. That was crazy. We didn’t have a sibling relationship, so we didn’t have sibling fights. It was more like, she lived there. I remember, when I was in, I mean, she must have been older than four years older than me. Because when I was in third grade, she was, I remember she started going out on dates. Yeah, she was older than four years older. She was like, 15. She was a teenager when we were kids. Yeah, she had like a 17 year old boyfriend who would come over in his car, his camero. Got a car, romantic, this guy’s got a car, can’t believe it, got a car. It was weird. Well you should reach out. You know, we never fought that much. Let’s let coffee so we can… I’ve been thinking about the fact that we really didn’t ever consider ourselves siblings, and we’re definitely not siblings now, so let’s get coffee. This is one more from you guys and then we’ll get into some of your disputes that you’re having that you’d like us to settle. Oh yeah, yeah we got those. Katie Lynn Wilson, speaking of kids, yeah lately I fight my 3-year-old everyday to wear clothes. Some days I win, and sometimes I have to watch him run around pantsless. Pantless. Not pantsless. Pantless? Both work. I, yeah, I totally understand. I mean at this– Pantless would be a good country singer. You know? Patty Pantless? Patty Pantless and she just performed and, I don’t know, just a really short bottom, you know? That would really catch on, Patty Pantless. Opening up for Patty Loveless tonight we’ve got Patty Pantless. (chuckles) Landa was seven, and he likes to wear clothes, but the altercation we get into is that he has to go, he has to have an escort to walk to his room. ‘Cause he’s scared to go to the room or the bathroom because of the way our house is set up, like, you have to go this way and then hang a left and go down a hallway. And it’s dark and scary to him. I have to escort him to the restroom. And then like, if he’s taking a shower? He’s like, dad, I don’t want you in here, but I want you right out here while I’m taking a shower. What? He makes you stand guard? Yeah like a security guard. For like, showers? You still do this? You don’t actually stand there. I act like I’m there, and then I leave. And I try to time it where I’m back when he gets out of the shower. But last time, I heard him, I was like doing something else, I was living my life, my best life, and all of a sudden, I hear him screaming, “Dad! You left! You left me!” You left me in the shower in my house. Yeah (chuckles). He’s so spooked. Oh my gosh. And I’m sympathetic because I was the same way, but I can’t, I’m doing the wrong thing by even escorting him, he almost peed his pants a few days ago because I would not get up from the dinner table in order to escort him to the restroom. Well, this is a difficult thing. Shepherd is, you know, he just turned nine. So he’s recently transitioned out of this. In our house, his room, all of our rooms are upstairs. So, but if we’re watching TV and it’s time to go to bed, and he’s gonna go to bed early, it has been in the last 12-months, he’s gotten to a place where he didn’t really complain about going up the stairs. Now, we would make him do it. But there were lots of times where we took him up there. But, this is a continual fight that I had with my wife. I’m like, well my parents would have never done this. My parents would have been like boy, you want me to escort you upstairs? (Push sound) Forget about it! And I would have just gone upstairs. But like, this is a different generation. We coddle. We escort them upstairs and stand guard while they shower. (chuckle) What are we doing to our children? Jordan Warner posted– Well this is a– Well, yeah, ’cause we put a new post out. A different prompt. Well hold on. We put out a new prompt which was tell us about an argument/disagreement you’ve had with someone recently, maybe we can help resolve it. And the reason why I wanted to put out that post is that, after I read this one. So I wanted to read this one from Kyle Hertubise, I think that’s how you say that, Kyle Hertubise. To this day, the biggest fight my wife and I have ever had is over the pronunciation of taco. What? Okay, I’m interested. We have been through job loss, buying a house, horrible catering experience with our wedding, our luggage lost on our honeymoon, and yet to this day, the biggest issue we have ever had is how to say Taco. I have said it with a soft A my entire life. She says it with a hard A. Hard A. Taco? I guess she says Tack-o. In retrospect, if that is our biggest problem as a couple we are lucky, however the fight continues to this day. It will mostly likely start again after this post. Well hopefully we can end it for you today, Kyle. No one in their right mind says Tack-o, I mean, Kyle’s wife It’s nothing. You’re name is not listed. And that’s good for you, because we would be all over it right now. I’m sorry to say, You are so wrong. But you have no ground here. Tack-o makes no sense, just say it to yourself out loud. Now first of all, maybe we’re wrong. Maybe soft versus hard means something else, but to me a hard A would be “tack-o” or maybe “take-oh”. But Taco is a soft A, and that is definitely the pronunciation of taco. I mean, is this like an upper Northwest kinda, is this a dialect somewhere I don’t know about? I hope not. I mean, I can’t think of a context now. Here it is, if I was writing a rap, and I wanted to rhyme taco and whacko, or if I said tobacco, and I really want taco to work, I would be like, “Look at you over there with your tobacco, “And look at me over here with my taco,” I might say it like that. That might work in Hamilton. But that doesn’t work in like, radio rap. Kendrick Lamar would never do that. But I’m sure that Lynn Manwell Miranda would do that. That’s the thing with Kyle. Kyle’s profile picture has his wife in it. Well, he still loves her even though she’s wrong about this. She is so wrong about it. That is a wonderful, wonderful thing, but she is so wrong about it. I mean, there’s, this is not, this isn’t even worth discussing anymore. Read Jordan Warner’s. Uh, my brother puts pb and jelly on one slice of bread and then puts the other on top, please put him to shame. Jordan’s brother takes one slice of bread, spreads peanut butter on it, then scoops out jelly, and spread it on top The same. Of the peanut butter, while there’s a whole other piece of bread naked over there. Please put him to shame. Well, first of all Jordan– We don’t like to shame people. I think that you’re coming at this the wrong way. I don’t think the point is to shame. Now we might have shamed Kyle’s wife, but she says taco, so… So I mean, we do have our standards here. But, there’s two sides of this argument. There’s a jelly side and a peanut butter side. No, the two sides are, well it’s gonna end up the same anyway. I just wonder what happens in the jar of the second thing you dip in, because that’s what’s not the same. Well, does this involve a cleaning of the knife before, or does this involve a separate utensil. Because it doesn’t matter either way. Right, ’cause it doesn’t matter, you would clean it. What I do, is I spread the peanut butter, and then I use the naked bread to clean any remaining peanut butter off onto the naked bread, and then I dip it into the jelly so as to not contaminate the jelly with peanut butter. That’s and I haven’t solved the issue. I lick and wash. No you don’t. I lick and wash. If I’m making one for my kids, or if I’m making a peanut butter and jelly sandwich and it’s only for my kids, I don’t make it for my wife– Hey baby, I do the peanuts what I’m making for you down here (chuckle). The peanut butter tax, I Just thought that was an expected part of parenting. So I do the peanut butter side first, and then I lick the peanut butter off, that’s my payment for doing this, and then I take it and I wash it under water and wipe it down, and then I go onto the jelly. And then I get the jelly, and then I lick the jelly as well. Here’s the problem, ’cause we’re not anywhere close to solving the problem. We’re, I disapprove of that, but they’re your kids. And they can get whatever you’ve got. But I wash the germs off, man. You rinse. That does it, that does it. What we’re really getting at is then in that moment, when you’re dipping the jelly and you’re gonna spread it on top of the peanut butter, it’s really hard to get a good jelly spread on a peanut butter surface. It’s like driving on ice. That is the problem, right. So it’s not, I mean, I don’t think it’s worth shaming somebody over, it’s just your missing. If you have a huge doll up of jelly, that vineyard kind of spreading of jelly on jelly on top of peanut butter. Maybe that could work? I know but I do think It just seems weird. Your brother is wrong. But I don’t think he needs to be shamed, I think he needs to be taught. So I just think you need to, you don’t need to use the lick method, you’re not a parent, maybe you are a parent, but I doubt that you are yet, if you are a parent, I definitely encourage the lick and wipe. Just specifically with a knife that’s got peanut butter on it (giggles). Don’t ever wipe and lick in life. (giggles) What about Goober, Goober Grape. Well here’s the interesting thing. My dad will do this thing where he’ll take peanut butter, he’ll take a scoop or two or three, put it in a bowl, then he’ll take a scoop or two or three of jelly– He does the mix? Then he mixes a lot. Sir mix-a-lot! In the bowl, and then he will spread that. I gotta respect that I’d like to lick that spoon. That is interesting because it taste different. It’s a different taste. It’s making a new substance. And if you’ve never done it, it’s kind of first see this, when did you see this? Kind of a head tilt thing. When did he do this? This is amazing! Every Christmas night, we go to nana and papa’s house, and we have breakfast for dinner. It’s like a tradition. We have like bacon, and eggs, and sausage, and grits, and these biscuits that my Aunt TC can like. She knows when to pop a biscuit out of the oven. When, ’cause I like an almost raw biscuit, and then she’ll leave some in longer like if you like a brown bisguit. And then my dad– There’s peanut butter and jelly on the biscuit? And then, it’s kind of like a desert. You eat that whole meal and then you have a desert which is peanut butter and jelly on a biscuit. Not just butter and jelly? No. ‘Cause butter and jelly is also a wonderful creation. I’ve never had that. You’ve never put butter and jelly together? Well yeah, I’ve never mixed it together. But yes, you’re right. So he’ll mix the peanut butter and jelly, and then it’s it’s own thing. It’s amazing. You realize that this is the kind of thing that would go viral on Reddit. It probably already has. Yeah. But if you’re like, home for Christmas, my dad just mixed peanut butter and jelly and then put it on the sandwich. And you have a good picture of it? It would get like 50,000 up votes. When you try it you’ll know exactly what I’m talking about it is a different thing. I believe it. I actually don’t know if I like it as good. Well, ’cause it may adulterate the peanut butter. That may be what’s happening. Actually, the peanut butter is strong. In the way he does it. Which is great for me, but still, there’s something weird about it, it almost taste like tainted peanut butter the way he does it. Well that’s not an endorsement. (laughter) Faith Leach. That’s what I call go, I love Goober Grape by the way too. But it’s distinctly two, it’s not mixed stripes. Do they still have that? Do they still sell Goober Grape? Oh yeah, oh yeah, oh yeah. Faith Leach brings up something that my wife and I actually recently got into an argument about. My husband and I have an ongoing argument about the word several. I use it as a number slightly more than three. He says it means seven. (laughter) We have been married 11 years and still quibble over it. Okay well. What is, okay go ahead. Definitively, it does not mean seven. Okay, I mean, when he says that it means seven, he’s obviously taking the root. He’s saying sev, saying several and seven. That’s can’t be right. I think he’s just trying to tick her off. But the argument that Jessie and I got into was, and you were there for this, I think it was when we were in New York, I said several was four. But I thought that several could mean four or more with my technical definition of it. And she said several can mean three. And I was like, we three is a few. (spitting) (laughter) Well, we know that a couple is two. Bring me a couple of napkins. I’ve always thought that a couple was two, a few was three, and several was four four or more. But not, like, seven. A handful was five, because that’s five. A handful is five, you’ve got five fingers, a handful. You know what, you smack of a like an English teacher, like grading a bibliography right now. And it’s, you’re on thin ice, brother. Really? When you’re that specific about something, no body gives a crap about, you’re like, who cares if I’m missing a period and two spaces in my bibliography? No body reads the bibli-freaking-ographies. Yes, I’m citing my source. The heart behind this, is that I’m giving credit where credit is due, like why are you nitpicking a semicolon? And that’s why I hate English. I’m just saying because I got graded on the semicolon location in the bibliography. So, you’re Googling this? No, no. No. Your argument is so weak you gotta Google? No, I’m not technically right, I’m just saying what it was in my family. Okay, okay, okay. All I can say is, I know that seven is not correct. Well, I’m with you on that. So I’m just saying, if you tell me several, I’ve always thought it was slightly more than three. So. Well, hold on, before you read this, I don’t know what my position is. Can I think for one second? Yeah, yeah, yeah. A couple is two. Can I have a few napkins? How many do I get? If I give you two napkins and you ask for a few– I would, I wouldn’t quibble. You wouldn’t quibble. But if you said can I have a few M&M’s and I gave you two– I’d feel cheated. You’d feel a little cheated, right? ‘Cause three napkins is just a little excessive for anybody except a baby. Could you bring several napkins? That would be a weird request in general. You need several. If you brought me three napkins– Can I have several M&M’s. It’s like, no body even says that. So give me a sentence where, that I would actually say it, first of all. Where would I ever ask for several? How many books, how many books have you read this month. Oh, several. Okay, you got me. So now I’m good, I’m in a sweet spot. I’m in it. I’ve read several books. Now if I ask you, how many books have you read, and you said, I’ve read several, I would be thinking that you had read not three, more than three, definitely more than three. Right right. Definitely more than three. But if I said three. Probably four. Exactly, Four to five. Exactly. Maybe six. Four to six is several. I’m on the same page with you. But if I had said three, you wouldn’t feel cheated, you’d be oh I kind of over-estimated. But if I said a few, see, the technical definition of several is more than two, but not many. Not many more than two? What? So, I’ve always thought, so I’m not saying that I definitely mean several can’t also mean three, but it definitely means more than two, and it definitely does not mean seven. I think it means four or more. Because I think few means three. Even though I know that doesn’t make sense. That’s just the way my brain works. I do think that a handful is a subset of several. Which we agree with. ‘Cause we’re saying several is four to six. And a handful is five. But wouldn’t the world work better if you, if a couple was two, a few was three, several was four, and a handful was five, and then seven was just like, just say seven. Well, it makes me think of that moment when you’re at a fast food restaurant and they’re like, you’re like, going through the drive through at Taco Bell, and they’re like, “You want some Hot Sauce with that?” And then I’m like, “Uh, yeah.” And they’re like, “How many?” And I’m like, ahhhh can’t answer that, you wanna just like, a handful, but then nah, I don’t want a handful, I just want a few. But a handful of– Five. A handful of hot sauce, Is too much. Is a lot. I kinda feel guilty. I can fit a lot in my hand. So then I’m like, what I’m trying to say is that, it’s really hard to say a number. If you’re like, would you like ketchup, how many ketchup packets, would you like ketchup with that is what they ask, and I’ll be like yes I will take three ketchup packets. It’s like you’re a weirdo if you say a number. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Just give me a couple. Give me a few. Two? Three or more. I think a few is the right answer for hot sauce, which I think is three. If you give me two and I say a few, I’d be like what? Hey! Where’s the third one? That’s what I’d say. But if you say several, and there’s not at least four, fist in cuffs. But Faith, it is definitive your husband is wrong. It does not mean seven. You guys need to quit arguing about that. Kirsty posted, my parents want to paint their living room gold, I told them there’s no way. It would look like baby poop. Now Kirsty, I can see from your profile picture that you are married. Which means that hopefully, you no longer live with your parents. ‘Cause she’s hugging up to somebody in a tuxedo, and she’s wearing a long white dress. So, it could just be like a weird cause-play. Now if you, I think it’s cos-play. Cause-play is when you like, do something for a cause. It’s like a charitable cause play event. It’s like if Hamilton donated all their money tonight to underprivileged rappers. Yeah, is Cosco and Cosplay. Cosco. I want to know If you live at home, If they’re baby poop’s gold then back that baby up to my truck. That’s true, first of all, if you know a baby that poops gold, you shouldn’t be on the internet at all. (chuckles) Right. You know, unless you’re selling that poop. But I think that if you live with your parents, yes, you say don’t do this, you’ll embarrass me. But, if you no longer live with your parents, I think this is no pun intended, a golden opportunity. I would love for my parents to paint their living room gold. Why? Just ’cause it would entertain me. You just want to see the guilded nature of, I dare anyone to do that. Golden living room. How shiny is it, I wonder. I hope it’s just like a freaking castle, like a palace. If it, Like Saddam Hussein’s bedroom, like at one time they put a picture of that somewhere, back when Saddam was a thing. In a golden bedroom. If my parents want to make their house look like Saddam’s bedroom, I’m like yeah, this is entertaining for me. I like to be entertained with no consequences. Hear what I’m saying? Well, if your living room is painted gold before you know, next thing you know, they’re throwing you over the side of a ship. That’s not what they do with Saddam. Yeah it is. They threw Osama over the side of a ship. That’s where he died. Oh that’s true. If you believe that. (chuckles) I’m concerned that the golden nature of the living room would interfere with my ability to watch the television. You know, I’m getting glintage, oh goodness, I can only see out of one eye, watching the Golf Channel, or whatever’s on television these days. NBA Basketball, what do people watch on television now? Sports? Yeah. Yeah. Connor Bizon, I was arguing with a coworker about hotdogs being a type of taco. (laughter) Hotdogs being a type of taco? The more they argued about it, the more I began to think they were right. So I don’t know exactly what side you were on, Connor. But I assume this is your coworker saying they are a type of taco. Not a tack-o. Connor became convinced that a hotdog is a taco. And I think what happens is, it’s a dangerous place, when the argument starts with what is a taco. And you come up with a definition that it is a rounded casing, open on the top, that can be held in one hand. You’re on a slippery slope to defining a hotdog as a taco. And that is a problem. You gotta start with what is a hotdog. Yeah, but what if you put a hotdog wiener inside of a tortilla. What do you have at that point? Something a stupid child would do. Because I’ve done that. (laughter) As a child, what I would do is I would take a hotdog, I’d put it in the microwave until it popped a little bit, then I’d take it, I’d put it into a tortilla– I actually like this better than a hotdog. And then I would put mustard on it. Well, when we would go camping, you brought this into our camping lives. You said, you know what? Oh yeah, I did it camping! And I thought this was freaking genius for once. You were like, you know what? We’re going down the grocery aisle on the way to the camping trip getting groceries, and you were like I’m reaching for the loaf bread, and you were like (mouth noises), and you were like let’s get tortillas. They’re smushable, they’re easily packable, and they, yeah, it, you pack them into stuff, and they’re not compromised the way that loaf bread is. After four hours of driving or hiking or whatever you’re going to do, your bread turns into the tortilla anyway, and you hate yourself for it. And it tastes great. I take that– And then we would buy those sausages– The Brontworth with the cheese inside of it. Yes! And we would wrap them in the tortilla. And we would make hot tacos. Hot Tacos? A hot, it’s happening to us man. A hotdog is a taco. No it’s not. No it’s not. It’s not man. I think that– A soft taco. A soft fluffy taco. A hotdog is a soft fluffy taco. You could put a wiener inside of a tortilla, you’ve created something new. I think a taco is a tortilla. First of all, a tortilla is involve in a taco. So, hot dog is not a taco because it’s got a bun. A bun is nothing but a fluffy tortilla. That’s not true. Flour. It’s made… Tortillas are flat, flat just like the Earth. There’s just a flat disc, that’s what the tortilla is. And then… I heard that. And then, but a bun is just simply a loaf of bread that has been split. You know what I’m saying? You’ve gotta start with the container. Shaped in a very special way, yeah I’ll give you that. And then I think that the insides of the taco can be anything, but I feel like they have to be loose. It can’t be encased. It can’t be a wiener. Once you put a wiener inside of a tortilla, you just got a new creation. It’s amazing, but it’s not a taco. And as much as I enjoy it, I would never call it a taco. Connor, your coworker is wrong. Tell him. You’ve been duped. And you almost got us. Ashley Collard, that’s a good last name. Good gracious. Tasty, depending on what you cook with it. You can have a bitter collard, you can have a nice, invitingly greasy collard. It’s difficult to make I bet Ashley’s collards really good without ham hock or bacon. Ashley, I hope you elope with a ham hock. (laughter) Wow. We need a new toilet. I want a new toilet from the store. Husband wants to buy a use toilet. A used toilet. Ham hock wants a used toilet. He says it’s stupid to pay ten times more for something you poop in. So pay ten times less for something other people have pooped in. Right. I think that the point, Ashley’s husband Mr. Collard, is that precisely what has happened with the thing that you are getting, it’s like saying, I don’t want a, no, no, no, don’t give me a meal, give me the thing that that guy left over on his tray. Well, it’s like I don’t, that’s not what it’s like. It’s like, I’m in the market for some new underwear. Some skivvy’s. I’m gonna go to the thrift store and buy some used skivvy’s. Whitey Tighties, Tighty Whiteys. That’s what it’s like. They’ve been cleaned. But what if functionally the toilet is, not functionally, but cosmetically, the toilet looks totally new. Yeah, I think she’s… You think he’s got a point? I definitely think he’s got a point. Absolutely. But then it’s kind of like you’re using a public restroom. Well, no, but you can completely, you can thoroughly wash that, the porcelain throne. It can become pristine. I think the real question is, is a toilet that you get at the store, really a virgin toilet? Or is there like a guy who tests it? I like to think there’s a guy who tests it. Listen, I mean, That’s a good job. Ashley, this is what you need to come to grips with: you’ve been going to the big box store, I’m not gonna name any names here, you’ve been going to the beverage aisle, and you’ve been getting those can drinks, and then you’ve been bringing those home, and you’ve been popping and drinking those can drinks. You’ve been feeding them to your husband. Your kids if you have them, your loved ones. Little collards. What you don’t know is that stock boy number four, five, or six, has peed on all of those can drinks. Yeah, that happens all the time. It happens all the time. I used to do it when I worked at the grocery store. I whizzed all over the top of those things. And then you touch it with your hand, you open it up, and then you wrap your lips around it. Yeah, it’s basically like having someone peed right into your mouth. It’s dried up though. The moisture from your mouth and from the beverage coming together intermingling, is, we’ve all done it. We’ve all drank the urine of a stock boy. So get over this toilet thing. You can clean it thoroughly. Yeah, but, you should also You should also clean them cans! Yeah, you should wash the tops of the cans. Don’t ever just take that La Coix, or whatever it may be, and just put it to your lips. I will say however, soft drinks like La Coix come packaged inside, in a box. Well, it’s the guy at the factory who pees on it before it goes into the box. I don’t think so. I don’t think so. I think we’re talking about open cans. People in the factories can’t get away with that kind of stuff. Factories have standards. A guy who’s crapping in a toilet before it gets shipped out. He’s got standards. But the stock boys, man. Grocery stores have no standards at all. Have you ever been back there? Sometimes you have to go use the bathroom in the back? And you’re like, “Where’s the bathroom?” And they’re like, “Back through there?” And you’re like, “I can go back there?” (chuckles) You mean me, just a random guy who’s in this grocery store right now, can push these doors open and see the inner workings of the grocery store and then crap in this toilet? And I could come out and be like I’m not gonna pee in the toilet, I’m gonna pee in the drinks. Or I could come out and be like I’m gonna pee on my hands and then rub my hands all over the drinks. There’s no body back there, I’ve never seen anybody back there. You could take the drinks back there, pee on them, and then continue peeing in the toilet if you had more pee than you knew. Right. You could drink some of the drinks and then pee that drink right on the other drinks. Ashley, let me ask you this. If you have people come over to your house, and they have to sit on your toilet and use it, how do you feel about it afterward, I mean. That’s a good point, Link. What if, maybe this. Maybe you need a new toilet every time you have friends over? Maybe you can do some investigative work. Maybe you just get as much information about the toilet as possible. I don’t know where you’re buying this used toilet, I don’t know who’s selling a used toilet, but I think if you could just be like can you tell me about the family that owned this. Used toilets need homes too. I think your husband might be onto something, Collard. Last question, Carol Suckerpunch Foley. My husband thinks that “Turning the A/C up” means to make it warmer in the house because you are making the temperature rise, while I insist it means making things cooler because you are turning up the power on what is changing the temperature. The same disconnect occurs in the winter with the heater. Please help us solve this argument before the weather gets any cooler. This is an excellent, excellent, point. Oh man, how many marriages are teetering on the verge of divorce over this alone. Too many. Too, too many. How many coworker relationships have almost shattered because I’ve gotten angry over this? I mean, I just cannot, it’s blown my mind how people a, here at our office don’t understand how a thermostat works. That’s a different issue though. It’s a different issue. But boy am I heated about it right now. You’ve had to explain that a number of times. That you keep it on auto. And then you set the temperature that you want. That’s how a thermostat works. And they both know this, so they’re off to a good start, they’re gonna make it. Turn the A/C up, Rhett. What would you do? Can you please turn the A/C up several degrees? Well, then I would be specific and you know the answer. Well in that case I would know that I needed, but, I– Turn the A/C up. First of all, the way to avoid this argument all together, is to say could you make it a little cooler and could you make it a little warmer, right? You don’t have to know even what’s on at all. And, I mean, I’ve got the nest thermostat, which I just set a range, right, and so, I don’t even know when the heat’s coming on and when the cool’s coming on, it’s just all about the range, so that solves the problem, too. Getting a thermostat where you both agreed on the lower limit of the temperature and the upper level of the temperature, solves all this problem. I do think you’re making a good point here, that if you’re committed to making a relationship work, there’s some arguments that you shouldn’t keep having. There’s an elegant solution to adopt a middle ground of, a way of speaking about things where everybody wins. And I think that’s it. Can you make it cooler in here or can you make it warmer in here? I’m cold, can you make it warmer. I’m cool, can you make it hotter? So the way around this is to bypass that and use language that’s clear, however– And it’s a great opportunity to show someone that you love them in the way that you change your language. Language is powerful. But, Carol, what I will say, this is where I’m going to definitively come down on this. And I have to think we agree on this. Turning the A/C up means making it colder. Here’s why. Absolutely, you are right. Turning the A/C up means making it colder because– Carol is right. If you, no, my husband thinks that turning, oh yeah, yeah, yeah, your husband is wrong. You’re right. Turning the A/C up means making it colder. Here’s why: because if you go back to your college dorm room when you had a window unit that did not have a thermostat but it simply had cool, or if you’re in a hotel one of those old hotels where it just had cool hi cool low, if you say turn the A/C up in that context it clearly means to crank it on more so it will get cooler. The A/C will work harder and get cooler. But if you’re in a modern home with a thermostat, you don’t have to have this argument. But I will say, if you take the logic of a window unit without any thermostat which probably came before any kind of A/C unit with a thermostat, so you go back to the roots of air conditioning, to turn it up, It’s either on or off. If you turn the heat, if you turn the heat up, degrees go up. If you turn the A/C up, degrees go down. Because the power. The power has increased to the unit that you referenced. But that could be complicated and controversial. So you don’t have to get your husband to agree. Well, you wouldn’t, because you, now if you said turn the thermostat up? That would mean make it hotter. Definitely. Turn the thermostat up, but if you turn the A/C up. But the way around this, can you make it a couple of degrees cooler, couple of degrees hotter, or you just get a thermostat that has a lower limit and upper limit. Ness is not a sponsor, we should look into them being a sponsor because I absolutely love it. I love the whole thing. You can program it with your freaking phone, and then it just lets you know when you’re saving energy. I don’t even think about it anymore, man. I don’t even think about it. I have one too, and I constantly change it manually. ‘Cause I just can’t not be in control of it. You’re constantly changing it? Yeah, I don’t think I got it set right. I hate hearing that noise when the A/C comes on, and it just feels like– You didn’t want it to. Like, the greenback draining from my pocket when the A/C comes on. What do you keep it at? I don’t know man, I don’t want to talk about it. I don’t want to get in an argument. Oh okay, well I wasn’t gonna argue with you. Well, hopefully, we have saved some marriages and relationships today. I like to believe that we have. We could have ended some, especially the, I mean, if Carol you can’t get your husband to agree with you. Especially this tack-o situation, I mean, you guys may not need to be married. That may just be the answer for you guys, I don’t know. We just want you guys to be happy. We want love to flow. So don’t let us stand in the way. The most important thing is not being right, but it’s being careful. (giggles) And by that, I mean full of care for those that you care for. We care for you, and the fact that you’re still listening means a lot to us. It does. We’ll speak at you again next week. Until that time, Enjoy a taco or two. I’m sure you can find places to watch us. Put a hotdog in a tortilla, but don’t call it a taco. And whatever you do, don’t call it a “tack-o.”