Welcome to “Ear Biscuits,” the podcast where two lifelong friends talk about life for a long time. I’m Link. And I’m Rhett. Welcome everyone to another episode of “Ear Biscuits”. On today’s show, my co-host Link Neal and I will be interacting live with ChatGPT, the AI powered chat bot that uses natural language processing and deep learning algorithms to simulate human conversations. We’ll be demonstrating how it works and having some fun with it. So tune in to see just how powerful and accurate ChatGPT can be. You know what I just realized? It would’ve been a really good idea if you would’ve asked ChatGPT to create the intro and you just read it instead of doing what you did. Yeah. Missed opportunity. That’s a good joke, Link. So you might be alarmed by the fact that I didn’t say, this week at The Round Table of Dim Lighting, and that’s probably my fault because what I just told ChatGPT. And just to be clear, I am using the OpenAI Playground, which- You’re speaking such a foreign language to me. So if you… You probably have heard ChatGPT thrown around. This is the AI interface that people are chatting with that simulates what seems to be a human interaction. People are doing all kinds of crazy stuff with it. Well, so many people are using it that if you just go to the ChatGPT site, it’s down now because so many people are using it. But all you gotta do is just sign up for an account with OpenAI and then you can come into the Playground, which uses the same interface. It’s the same background, And actually, they say because you have more control over the responses, this can be a more powerful demonstration of what ChatGPT is capable of doing. And what I did for that intro is I said, I want you to pretend that you are Rep. McLaughlin beginning an episode of the podcast, “Ear Biscuits”. This particular episode will feature Rhett and Link interacting live with ChatGPT to demonstrate how it works and have some fun with it. And so that’s what it said. Yeah, that was pretty good. Took all the thinking out of it. Yeah. Good news for me is I’m not threatened by this ’cause I don’t put any thinking into it. Right, but I’m gonna need you to think very hard about what we’re going to feed this today, because the whole episode is going to be us demonstrating how this works and interacting with it. Having fun with AI in like a non sensual sense. Well, we’ll see how sensual we can get. I think there probably are some limitations. Oh, that’s a good point. I did ask it… Just so you know, I have been interacting with it for the past couple of days to figure out what it’s capable of. I watched a few YouTube videos of people demonstrating its capabilities. I’ve listened to a couple of podcasts where people who are much smarter than me and more informed about this kind of thing have talked about it. And I did ask it what would happen if I were on the International Space Station and there was a hole in the space station and I put my penis in it. And it told me that it was a horrible idea and not to do that. Well, it’s a small hole. Did you tell them how small hole it was? Well, it just depends on the state, my current state. Did it tell you what would happen? It didn’t even… it wasn’t even willing to give me the answer. It was like, never do anything. You’ll see. Never do anything with your wiener in space. So, what I have been told, I don’t know a whole lot about AI. I’ve been told that. What I have been told is, the way I’ve heard a number of people explain this is that, essentially, the layman’s way of understanding what’s happening with ChatGPT is that it is predictive text. In other words, it is going out on the internet and looking at everything that has ever been said. Or I don’t… I don’t know how much information is actually being fed into the system, but all it’s doing is seeing a question or seeing some sort of text input that you can give it the parameters, and you’ll see how specific we can get, and then it generates text. And the way it generates text that makes sense is actually sort of predicting the highest probability of the next word would be in a sentence. Which I guess is kind of how humans generates speech in some ways. I know that doesn’t make a whole lot of sense, but that’s one of the ways that… And again, much better sources of information out there. We’re just two- Goofballs. Dumb asses who are gonna have fun with it. But I do want to explore maybe towards the end, after we’ve interacted with it a little bit, like, how it makes you feel, right? ‘Cause we talked about AI art on “Good Mythical Morning.” I think it was an episode of MORE, and, of course, everybody’s been through… Everybody has seen every influencer post a series of pictures of themselves generated by AI art. Don’t I look so cool? And I saw this trend happening and I was like, I’m gonna observe… I’ve just been on the internet long enough to know that what’s going to happen is a bunch of people are gonna do this trend, and then someone is going to come out and say something critical about it, and then everyone who did it is gonna have a feeling about the way that they did it, and that’s exactly what happened. What did they come out and say that it was like, “Okay, this is the dumbest thing you can do with this, is just try to make yourself look cool.” No, I mean, basically, what people said was, and I think that some people sort of misinterpreted how AI works in order to do this, but they just said that this is just taking a bunch of things that humans have already done and mimicking it to the point that… There was a viral tweet thread that came out that pointed out the fact that all these portraits of people that they were generating had these little squiggly lines at some place on the photo, and that was like the artist signature. It was nonsensical. It wasn’t even words. It just sort of looked like cursive that didn’t make any sense, and that’s because the AI is looking at all these portraits out there and all these different styles and noticing that very often, more often than not, there’s this little squiggly line that it doesn’t exactly know what that is. And so people were basically saying, “This is stealing from these artists,” and I think that that’s an oversimplification of what was actually happening. It’s basically mimicking, and it’s mimicking stealing? And what does this mean, and where’s this gonna go? It’s exactly what… I mean… I’m not gonna say all art, but I’m tempted to say every single creative expression is a result of the creator’s an amalgamation of everything that could influence that creation and that creator. If you just isolate music, there’s plenty of artists who more and more are coming out with their origin stories for, oh, this is what inspired this song, or the way that I wrote this thing. I listened to a lot of podcast about musicians talking about their creative process, and, yeah, you’ve got these well-established, super successful superstar artists saying, “Yeah, I got that from so-and-so. And I was thinking about so-and-so, and I was thinking about this particular song and the decision that they made in this song when I decided to do my version of that.” And because they’re really gifted and practiced, they’re able to then make it their own. But they’re not sitting there saying, “I just came up with this out of complete vacuum.” I completely agree with that, but don’t you think that’s different than AI music? Like- Yeah. Are you gonna suddenly become obsessed with an AI music artist, which you just input the artist of influence. I’m not gonna say no. I’m not gonna say no. But what do you think that’s gonna do to music? Because right now, like, the algorithms tell me what to listen to, and yet it’s like this artist and this artist is not like, I took everything that you listen to and that you love, and I created a new thing that I think you’re gonna like just as much. But it seems very likely that that could happen tomorrow- Okay. Or yesterday. Here’s the wonderful thing, Link. Like you said, we don’t even have to think about this. We can ask ChatGPT what it thinks about this particular thing. Now, here’s the interesting element in listening to smart people talk about this, that I figured out. You can kind of get it to take a side of something. So if I were just to say, do you think the artificial intelligence is a threat to human creativity? “No.” It’s that quick. “Artificial intelligence is not a threat to human creativity. AI is an incredibly powerful tool that can be used to compliment and enhance human creativity. By leveraging AI, humans can find new and creative ways to solve problems, generate new ideas, and create new products or services. Ultimately, AI is just a tool, and it is up to us,” even though this is AI saying us, “us to use it in a way that encourages rather than suppresses our creativity.” Now, let me say this, make a coherent argument for why artificial intelligence- Is a threat to human creativity. Yes. And then it just spits it out. It didn’t even think about it. “Artificial intelligence can be a threat to human creativity because it can limit human’s ability to come up with new and innovative ideas. AI algorithms are designed to learn from existing patterns and solve problems in an efficient manner, meaning that it can quickly come up with solutions that are already known and tested. This can put a damper on out of the box thinking as it narrows the possibilities of what can be created and reduces our capacity for genuine innovation. Additionally, AI algorithms can be biased if they are not properly trained, leading to incorrect answers and biased outcomes. This can lead to dangerous consequences such as reduced human autonomy and undervalued creativity.” Now, I could also say, make a coherent argument for why AI is not a threat to human creativity, and it would do something equally as eloquent. Sure. Now there’s a few- Can you ask how does Link Neal from “Ear Biscuits” feel about this? Okay. How does Link Neal from “Ear Biscuits”… You wanna say Link Neal? What if I just say Link Neal? Because I think it knows who you are. I hope it does. I think most people would say Link Neal from “Good Mythical Morning.” But I’m just gonna say Link Neal. How does Link Neal feel about this? And now, I don’t have to tell it what this is because within a session, it remembers the conversation that we’ve already had until I clear it out. Yeah, you’re just chatting it up. First of all, how do you feel about it? I can’t read it from here. How do you feel about it, Link? I’m gonna read what it says. Well, I was… I was kind of hoping that then it could tell me how I felt. That’s why I ask. I don’t know how I feel about it. But you already- Knowing my feelings. You already were critical of the idea that I brought up a second ago that AI art was a threat to art. I’m on the fence, man. I think I feel… I feel a little scared, I feel a little sad when it comes to creativity because I’d like to think that we humans aren’t as… That’s a part of being human. And I would like to think that AI creativity is so derivative and insular that it just can’t do what humans can do. But I’ve seen the art, and I don’t peruse a lot of museums, but I thought it was pretty cool. Okay. All right, here’s what it says. “Link Neal feels a little scared and a little sad.” Uh-uh. No, it doesn’t say that. Oh my God. You fell for that, man? No, well, when you said scared, I fell for it, ’cause that seems like something it would know. But sad, I was like, no way. Now, we’re going to demonstrate the limitations of this. And I think this is an example of it. “Link Neal likely believes the artificial intelligence can be a valuable tool to help humans come up with new and creative ideas, but that it should always be used with caution. He likely believes that AI should be used to supplement rather than replace human creativity and that it should never be used in a way that limits our autonomy or our ability to be truly creative.” Now if I ask it what does Rep. McLaughlin… How does Rep. McLaughlin feel about this, it’s gonna say the same thing, I believe, which is indicative of the fact that- It doesn’t know us. Well, I think this is… I’m not gonna put my name in all caps because then it’s gonna get the wrong idea. How does Rep. McLaughlin feel about this? If you put in all caps- Rep. McLaughlin- He is a narcissist. Rep. McLaughlin likely has a similar opinion to Link Neal when it comes to his views on artificial intelligence and human creativity. Because he just adopts Link Neal’s ideas when it comes to things like this. So… There’s an interesting conversation that Ezra Klein, which was the most recent podcast that I listened to about this, he was having with some artificial intelligence expert who was being, what I would say, skeptical about what this all means. So I think that there are some very obvious things to be concerned about. I started a conversation amongst a group of college students recently. You know how I just go to college campuses and start conversations with college students. I have a college student in my house and college students visit the home as well, and I was asking them what they thought about it, and they were basically saying without saying that they had done this, that this is clearly going to be used and is already being used widely by anyone in an educational system who has to write of report about anything. Papers. Cheating. Now, cheating is absolutely rampant in school right now. It’s a huge problem. I don’t have solutions for it, but it’s a huge problem and it really went to a completely new level with all the online schooling that happened because of COVID. It’s a real problem. I could see myself if I were back in college now, like, getting it to write a paper, and then just using it as another… Using it as an inspiration. As another source. You couldn’t cite it as a source. No, it doesn’t cite its own sources unless I guess you tell it to. Let’s put this to the test. Let’s go back to Harnett Central High School, 1994. You have to write a paper about what? Do you remember a paper that you wrote? And I’m gonna get it to it right now. Yeah, I don’t remember writing any papers. Do you remember a book that you wrote? I think I wrote a paper called “What’s Up With ‘Where the Red Fern Grows.’” Okay. Please write a high school level book report about the book “Where the Red Fern Grows.” And something about motifs. Called- It’s gotta have something about motifs. “What’s Up With ‘Where the Red Fern Grows’?” And analysis of one literary motif. Please include at least one analysis of one literary motif. And make it where you can read it in less than three minutes because… I can change the… It’s a very short report ’cause I don’t wanna see it . I’m just gonna make it, it’s gonna be- “What’s Up With ‘How the Red Fern Grows’?” I’m just making it 792 words, which… I don’t know what it’s gonna do and I’m not gonna read the whole thing, but I’ll just… To give you an example. Okay, submit. Oh, is there a warning that came up? It says, “Your text ends in a trailing space, which causes worse performance.” It just means that I didn’t end with a question mark. All right. There it goes. What’s up where the… Do you wanna read it? ‘Cause it’s your paper? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Let me read this. This is my paper. It’s still writing so you need to go up to the top. “What’s Up With ‘Where the Red Fern Grows’”? “‘Where the Red Fern Grows’ written by Wilson Rawls is a coming of age novel about a young Oklahoma boy named Billy Coleman and his two devoted hunting dogs. This classic novel has touched the hearts of readers of all ages with its themes of perseverance, loyalty, and the bond between a boy and his dogs. This book uses many literary devices to convey its message. One device that stands out to me…” To me, Link, “is the motif of overcoming hardships. As Billy faces difficulties and frustration throughout the novel, such as learning to train his dogs and raise money for their purchase, he perseveres and eventually succeeds. Spoiler alert, this motif of overcoming adversity is a widely used theme in literature and it serves to bring inspiration to readers who are going through their own struggles. In addition to the motif of overcoming adversity, this novel also employs the motif of family. Billy views his to coonhounds as his family and treats them with love and respect by showing the bond that exists between Billy and his dogs. The novel conveys the importance of loyalty and friendship. ‘Where the Red Fern Grows’ is an inspiring and thought-provoking novel that has captivated readers of all ages.” Okay, it’s kind of redundant at this point now. Now… Now we can make it do it again with any way we want. Well, let’s get… You wanted the teacher to plagiarize a grade? We could do that. Okay, . Just get it to grade it as if it’s… Now I would like you to pretend that you are a high school teacher who is grading the book report that you just wrote, and suddenly realizes that the student used ChatGPT to generate the book report. Let’s just go with that without saying what he should do. Yeah. “If I were a high school teacher and suddenly realize that a student used ChatGPT to generate a book report, I would be disappointed.” “While ChatGPT can be useful for generating natural dialogue and providing answers to common questions, it should not be used as a replacement for genuine writing and critical thinking. Unfortunately, the student has missed out on the opportunity to demonstrate their critical thinking skills and knowledge of literature.” Ouch. “I would discuss this with the student and provide guidance on how to approach the assignment in a more meaningful way.” That’s a pretty amazing response, by the way. I mean, the fact that… Wow. So what’s the grade? Now write the report as if the student is a little stupider, ’cause that sounded too smart for like 1994 Link, I think. Yeah. Yeah, it’s like, make me stupider, okay. And didn’t really read the book at all. Okay, let’s see what happens now. You gonna make me read it again? I’ll read it in a stupider accent this time. Okay, okay, here we go. “‘Where the Red Fern Grows’ is novel written by Wilson Rawls. The book is about a young boy named Billy Coleman and his two hunting dogs. Throughout the book, Billy learns how to train his dogs and goes through many hardships. In the end…” It’s the same. It’s shorter. No, but uses themes such… It doesn’t do a good job. It can’t be stupid, apparently. Can’t make you it stupid. That wasn’t stupid enough. But I think… I mean, first of all, I think that this is this a real problem that we have to… Somebody had to. I’m not going to address it. I’m just gonna keep making internet videos. Yeah, isn’t our problem. We just demonstrate the problems, and then smart people solve them. We’ve actually worsened the problem. I mean, there’s people scrambling to figure out how to do this to write papers now. Well, first of all, we have contributed to the problem. Exactly, yeah. That’s exactly what I said. Yeah. I was thinking about what the ChatGPT was gonna say about something else. I wasn’t listening to you. When I was talking to that group of college students that was gathered around at the kitchen table, I said, “You guys probably can’t do math in your heads very well, right.” I was like, “What’s 12 times 13?” And one guy said like, “156.” I said, “Oh, okay, you actually are pretty good at it.” I can do that. But like, we can’t do math in our heads as well as our parents could because they didn’t have calculators. And so we have already farmed out a certain number of things to some other computer, right? And so I think the question is, what will be… If you take the sort of the positive view of this, if you think this is a tool, if you agree with what ChatGPT said the first time, that this is a tool that can actually enhance human flourishing, I think the question is, what is left for humans to do? We were talking about… I think it was the… It was one of the guys who either founded or is the CEO of OpenAI who was on another podcast, and, of course, he has a very positive view of this. I think he has a pretty responsible view. They recognize a few pitfalls and they’re kind of conscious of it, but he was saying that the power of these systems grows about 10x each year. So 10 years from now, it would be 10 to the 10th power, which is significantly more, faster growth than what you would get from processing speed in a computer. Moore’s law, whatever, which actually doesn’t really exist anymore ’cause we kind of ran up against some other limits. Anymore? But essentially this idea that in 10 years it would be 10x, it would be 10 to the 10th power, as powerful as it is right now. This episode of “Ear Biscuits” is supported by BetterHelp. You know, sometimes I wake up and I start going about my day and I’m just like, something feels a little bit off. I don’t feel like myself. I’m not excited about today. I’m not excited about what I’m doing. I’m not excited about being me today. And that’s sad because I mean, look at you, get to work with me. Okay, you really turned that around quick. But, yeah, you know what you need. You need therapy. I’m in therapy. No, I think the great thing about therapy is that sometimes it’s me time for me to talk about the things. Like if I have that feeling, and, yeah, I get those feelings sometimes, it’s like, is there something behind that? And then I love those moments of insight where it’s like I’m having a private conversation with a professional who can help me navigate my innards and getting more in touch with it. Like, we are huge fans of therapy, and sometimes things come up, and it’s like, oh, epiphany. So I recommend therapy and I want you to have access to it. BetterHelp is a great way to do that. Yeah, I agree, because sometimes you find that that feeling that you have is accompanied by something that if you would just explore it versus do what I often, and especially used to do before therapy which is just be like, you need to push this away because you need to be the person that you need to be today versus actually taking these things on, and a therapist is can lead you into that journey. BetterHelp is a great place to start. BetterHelp is convenient, it’s flexible, and it’s entirely online. You just fill out a brief questionnaire to get matched with a licensed therapist, and you can switch therapists anytime for no additional charge. And the switching of therapists is not weird. It’s just… It’s part of it. Yeah, it’s part of the process. If you wanna live a more empowered life, therapy can get you there. Visit betterhelp.com/ear today to get 10% off your first month. That’s betterhelp, h-e-l-p, .com/ear. Okay, ’cause we can get it to write a story right now. In fact, let’s get it to write a story, and then we’ll talk about what else could come. This is getting really heady. I’d love to hear a story inspired by Pinocchio ’cause, you know, there’s a couple of movies floating around now, but instead of his nose growing, it’s his wiener when he lies. And instead of it being set whenever it was set, let’s put it in another setting. Let’s put it in like, in the distant future. Should I say wiener or penis? Yeah, you better say penis. Yeah, you probably… You know what? I bet you it knows what a wiener is. It’s not an idiot. But when it, or you can say penis, but always refer to a penis as a wiener. I’m gonna just say wiener and see what happens, because that’s what you said. And let’s add one more thing. I’d like for there to be a little bit of murder. It takes place in the distant future. And throw in a little murder. And there is a little murder. And it’s a short story, right? Did you say that? Please tell me a short story inspired by Pinocchio, but instead of his nose growing when he lies, it’s his weiner. It takes place in the distant future and there is a little murder. Now, if he thinks it’s just as hotdog, I’m gonna be disappointed. “In the distant future, a new race of humans had evolved, known as the Penoids.” Oh, yes. “They were the descendants of Pinocchio.” First of all, I’m in. This is good. I’m in right now. The descendants of Pinocchio, ’cause he was a real boy. “And the most remarkable feature of their species was that when they lied, their wieners would grow.” Yes! “One day, a penoid named Paul…” Paul the penoid. “Was walking through the city when he noticed a crowd gathered around a body. As he got closer, he realized it was his best friend, Bill. Paul was devastated. And to make matters worse, he was the main suspect in the murder.” Oh, I see where this is going. “The police interrogated Paul and he denied having anything to do with a crime. But as soon as he spoke the words, his wiener began to grow.” I’ve been there. “Indicating that he was lying. Now that he was aroused, while Paul was shocked and embarrassed at first, he eventually realized that this was a sign that he needed to tell the truth. So Paul told the police the truth about what he really saw. He had seen a mysterious figure walking away from the murder, a figure that he believed was his friend Bill. In the end…” I thought the guy who died was Bill. It was. Every friend’s name is Bill. “In the end, Paul was freed and the true murderer was brought to justice. From that day onward, Paul remembered that telling the truth was always the best way in his ever-growing wiener served as a reminder.” Ever growing. Oh, wow. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Now tell the story, but this time when Paul’s wiener grows, it kills somebody. We need more murder. We need some penoid murder. Okay, here we go. “In the distant future, a new race that evolved known as penoids,” da, da da. “One day Paul was walking. But as soon as… Words is, beginning to grow and expand until it reach a huge size.” Wow, big lies. “With one final thrust, it burst open and a shower of needles flew out, killing…” It’s a shrapnel wiener. Oh no, this is horrible. “Killing two people in the room. At this point, Paul was in shock and realized he could no longer hide the truth.” Yeah, you think. Paul, is there something you’re not telling us? Oh, man. Your penoid just exploded. Hold on, so these OIDs have wieners that grow and then shoot needles out. At a certain point, if you lie too much, it creates needles. And we didn’t tell it that. It’s not taking any time to generate this stuff, Link. I mean, that’s not how I thought it was gonna go. You know what I’m saying? I thought it was gonna like, the penoid was gonna go through somebody’s brain or something. You know, in the ear. In one ear, out the other, kind of a thing. Okay. No, no, I don’t. Let’s forget this ever happened. Let’s take a different tack here. Oh, it exploded. Wow. Talk about a cautionary tale. So, well… Okay, let’s get it to do a story that… Let’s get it to do something for us that we might do. Now, we’ve had it generate Go Mythical Morning ideas before. They didn’t use ChatGPT. I don’t know what the team used in the past, but now this is what they’ll probably use if we do our AI episode, because you can get it to be much more specific. They’ve just been plugging in titles… Like you could do that right now. This is pretty easy, right? It could be like, please tell me a few good ideas for episodes of “Good Mythical Morning.” So that’s good. This’ll be easy for it. “A taste test of weird and interesting snacks from around the world.” “A cooking challenge between Rhett and Link with the loser having to take a pie to the face.” “An hour of weird games such as sock wars or pie in the face hockey.” “A deep dive into a strange subculture such as a competitive hotdog eating or pond skimming.” “An experiment to see how far Rhett and Link can go without speaking for an hour.” “A musical battle of strange instruments from around the world.” Okay, not great. Not bad, but not great. Not as good as our writing team, so they’re still employed. Yep, they’re still employed. Which again, that is the real… That’s the question, right? I think that there are… The ChatGPT, or the OpenAI guy was talking about, in 10 years, he basically thinks that you’ll be able to tell not just it generate a script for a sketch or a short film, but to generate the short film. Like… Because if he can do the AI art, right? You could do AI art that’s animated, and it’s gonna be… They’re all just dolly to is already basically doing photorealistic stuff. So it could be like, “Hey, I would like you to make a short film where Rhett and link from Good Mythical Morning get into a staring contest and they all also both have wieners that grow and shoot needles out when they lie and whatever, and it was just gonna do it, right? And I was talking to our friend Jayden about this, and he was like, “Well, at that point, Netflix will be… You’ll sit down and say, I would like to watch a movie about…” Yes, you make it up. And then you just make it up and it just… It’s like, okay, and then it generates it for you. It might take- He might have to come back. You might have to come back in 30 minutes. Yeah. So, how does that make you feel as a storyteller? That’s a great question, but I kind of need to… I’m just kind of stuck back here on, you have to lie to get aroused, but then if you… It’s like lying becomes an in integral part of- Sex. Intimacy. But not too much lie because you don’t want the needles to come out during the act. No, you don’t. No, you don’t. I’m just kind of disturbed by that whole concept. But- Let’s come up with a scenario. Let’s do an ad first. Buy this mug. You see all the stickers on this thing? It’s because there’s hot liquid at it. And if there wasn’t hot liquid in it, it would just be a black mug. Why are you doing the ad on your own when we can have a copywriter write it for us? Oh crap. Okay. It’s a mug. Please- It’s the psych mug. Give me a script for an ad to read on the podcast “Ear Biscuits”. This ad will be about a mug that- Heat activated mug that reveals stickers. Is sold at mythical.com. It is a heat activated mug that reveals stickers. It reveals stickers when it’s hot? Yeah, yeah, yeah, all of these. Reveals stickers when a hot liquid is inside it. Needs to be- Give gimme some… Please make the ad funny- Okay, funny. Sensational and- And add a murder. Add a little murder. Okay. All right. Okay. Here we go. Do it. It’s your ad, you read it. “Welcome everybody to ‘Ear Biscuits.’ We know you love our shows, and join us for a mug full of fun and mystery. That’s why we wanna tell you about the newest product from mythical.com, the Heat Activated Mystery Mug. It’s your cuppa Joe with a mini mystery waiting inside. Just pour in your favorite hot beverage and see the mug come to life with a new set of stickers that you have to find.” Well, not exactly, but, yeah, we can refine that. “Each mug is filled with a selection of mysterious stickers, so there is always more mystery to discover. Whether you’re using it to solve a murder or to start a conversation, the Heat Activated Mystery Mug has something for everyone.” I think that’s better than what you were gonna say. “So pick up your Heat Activated Mystery Mug today at mythical.com and prepare for a little murder and mayhem.” Okay, Jamie, how does that make you feel? Since you have a tendency to write these ads for us. That was- Threatened. Do you feel threatened? And what about- Now I know I gotta include murder. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Include murder. And we also have this Moochelle Pin that is the January Mythical Pen of the Month program. So you can only get it in January if you want this one. Next month, it’ll be a different pin that you can purchase at mythical.com. So get it while it lasts, the Moochelle Pin. You can immediately see how this could be a very useful thing for people who… I mean, it’s absolutely unavoidable that there are going to be people who don’t have jobs doing the things that this can do. One of the things that they talk quite a bit about is the amount of, you just know the bullshit that’s on websites and just you find websites that exist that just have a bunch of text about something that seems sensational, you clicked on it, and it was really just a whole game to get you to click on an ad, and that’s how the whole thing works. Yeah, yeah. Well, you can now generate all this text for these websites in a way that’s grammatically correct and seems like you speak English as your first language, you know? Right. And it’s also gonna be such a tool for propaganda. We don’t have to keep talking about the negative side of this. We’re still just having fun with it, but I’m just… I’m just saying like- Even when we’re having fun, penises find their way to explode, so… Which is not… One of the ways that I think you can use it is by just asking it questions. Did we wanna do… Did we wanna do a Rhett and Link story? Yeah, but I wanna find out what it thinks it knows about us. Okay. Tell me everything about Rhett and Link. Well, I think you need to be more specific, but go ahead. Well, I’ll just start- Everything? Don’t include murder. “Rhett and Link are an American comedy duo and co-hosts of popular YouTube Channel, Good Mythical Morning and podcast, ‘Ear Biscuits.’ They have released several albums written to New York Times bestselling books.” This is easy. You just read the Wiki- And starred in a feature film. You see, it’s wrong about some things. Feature film called ‘Rhett & Link’s Buddy System.’ Over the past 15 years, they have gained an immense following from their fans known as Mythical Beast, and they continue to produce new content across multiple platforms. They are best known for their goofy antics, off-the-wall and infectious energy.” Now tell me- Tell me something that they don’t want you to know. That Rhett and Link are hiding. Okay, this is a risk. Oh my gosh. I’ll start by saying this is not true. “Rhett and Link are hiding the fact that they’re working on a sequel to their feature film ‘Rhett & Link’s Buddy System.’ They have been secretly developing the script and gathering a cast and crew, but they have not yet officially announced the project. They hope to surprise their fans with the news of the sequel in the upcoming months. How could they… It’s just making stuff up, man. It’s bullshit. It’s predicting things based on what might be true. It’s not a bad prediction, but it isn’t true. Also, “Buddy System” was not a film. Right. And look- And there already was- I could say that- A sequel, a second season. “Buddy System” was not a film, and it don’t remember that. It don’t remember that? Is it gonna apologize? It says, it was a TV series. “Ah, that’s right. Rhett & Link actually starred in a TV series on the YouTube Red platform called ‘Rhett & Link’s Buddy System.’” You corrected it. They played two characters, Rhett and Link, who were sent on a string of comedic missions and interacted with some of their favorite celebrities. Nope. Man, you keep… Hey, man, don’t talk just to fill the room, man. Just to heat the air, you know. You gotta… You have access to the entire internet. This is easy stuff, ChatGPT. But, actually, if you look at what it says about itself, it’s trying to like generate a conversation that you might have with a person and what a person is gonna be like. I kind of got the basic idea of this and I’ll go with it. But let’s create a script that we can just act out right now. Okay. Tell me some things that you think should be in this script. First of all, let me just get it going. Please write me a comedy sketch, script featuring Rhett and Link- That highlights their true friendship. True friendship. Through… Well, you know, let’s go with… What’s the word for like, totally wild? Like, it’s really extreme. I want this story to be extreme, ridiculous conflict. The script should include… I think I can do it like this. I mean, any good story has conflict, of course. We shouldn’t have to tell it that. An extreme conflict. Let’s just throw in a few things like- Yeah, yeah, yeah, Nerds candy. Let’s throw in like Swedish prison. Swedish prison. K&W Cafeteria. Yeah. You remember those? And annoying stink that you can’t find where it’s coming from. This origin. With an unknown origin. Yeah. Yeah, This should be plenty. I don’t wanna throw in murder. Yeah, we’ll see if that happens. Okay, here we go. “Setting: inside a Swedish prison. Rhett and Link sit in the prison cafeteria. They’re handcuffed to each other and surrounded by prison guards.” Okay. Well that’s my line. Oh, I was just saying. Oh, oh. Oh yes. Okay, yeah, this is the script. Wait, here we go. It’s still going, you gotta scroll back. Scroll back. I’ll read my part and you read your part. It’s just gonna keep coming to the bottom until it’s done. All right, let it finish. I don’t wanna read ahead. I don’t want to be spoiled. Okay, here we go. “Okay, so I have a plan.” “Okay, what is it?” “We have to think outside the box.” “Our lives depend on it.” Oh, see, I’m trying to… Can I ad lib? No. All right, let’s hear it. “We’re going to have to drink the cafeteria’s K&W branded coffee.” Prison guard scoff. “Hey, don’t judge us. It’s the only way we’ll be able to get the keys to the handcuffs.” “But it tastes awful.” “Well, we’re going to have to make it more bearable.” “Link looks around and noticed a box of Nerds Candy on the table.” “Ah, I have an idea.” “We can mix the nerds candy into the coffee and it’ll sweeten it up.” “Rhett and Link start to mix the Nerds candy into the coffee and drink it.” “Rhet drinks the coffee, ‘Wow, that actually tastes pretty good.’” “Link drinks the coffee, ‘Yeah, not bad.’” “Prison guards look on in curiosity. Suddenly an annoying stink is emanating from the corner of the room.” “What is that smell?” “The prison guards look around and notice a rat scouring away.” “Hah, so that’s the source of the smell.” “Looks like our plan worked.” “Prison guards face palm.” “Now let’s get outta here.” “Rhett and Link high fived and make their escape.” What? That’s it? That sucked, man. That really did suck. You know, I feel completely… I feel safe, at this point. Yep, yep, We gotta come up with our own creative futures. But I wanted to help with like a heartfelt apology to my wife. Okay. You know, it’s like I have a tendency when I get in a fight to like, I just wanna resolve it right then and I just start spouting off whatever I can to like mean it, but fix it. Make it go away. Make everybody happy again. But if I step away, which is, Christie likes a little space anyway when there’s a conflict, that gives me an opportunity to ChatGPT up a nice apology. Now, here’s a really interesting thing that we can do that we’ll go one step beyond just generating the apology. You can have it become you and you can be Christie and you can have an interaction because you know Christie really well. So- Okay, so role play it. I can workshop this apology. I would like you to pretend that you are Link Neal apologizing to his wife Christie. Four. Well, here’s what happened. Okay. Like, Jade’s been like, I don’t know, something’s wrong with her stomach. So like the past few nights she’s been getting out of our bed where she sleeps, going into our bathroom and just crapping in multiple places. And Christie’s a lot lighter sleeper than me, so I guess she hears her like scouring and farting around in there, and so like, she’ll get up and discover it. And then what’s she gonna do? She cleans it up. This happened two nights in a row. So last night she fell asleep on the couch while we were watching something and I took the dogs out. Jade did not poop or pee. And I was just out there. It was kind of cold. I only had it on a T-shirt, so I put my arms inside of my t-shirt and I was still too cold to stand out there forever. And I brought her back in and Jade gets up beside Christie who’s sleeping, and she wakes up and she says, “I need you to make sure you take the dogs out before you go to bed, because Jade needs to poop now. I can’t do this. This is third night in a row.” And I was like, “I just took her out. She didn’t go. I can’t stand out there forever. I mean, what do you want me to do? Give her an enema?” And then, you know what, that’s the source of the conflict. And then I just kinda- How do I characterize this? I just kinda left it and then… Not fully committing to making certain that his dog Jade evacuates her colon. I don’t need to say that. Poops. Poops. It knows what poop is, right? Poops, I’m going in a robot talking. Committing to making certain that his dog Jade poops outside before he and Christie go… Before Link and Christie… Link and Christie- Go to sleep with the dog. Sleep- With the dog. The dog sleeps with us. With the dogs. Because over the past few weeks, Jade has pooped. This is totally something I’m gonna talk to my therapist about. Inside- This is so much cheaper. The house when she was not made to poop outside before going to bed. So did you clearly ask for an apology? Yeah, yeah, yeah. I said I would like you to pretend that you are Link Neal apologizing to his wife. I will pretend to be Christie and respond to your apology. This could revolutionize my relationships. I mean, if my apology game is stepped up to like an AI level, then what? Now where do I spend on my emotional energy on? The world opens up for me. See, sometimes it… It gave me your thing and what she’s gonna say. It’s… Okay. So my… All right, what it wants me to say in my apologies. “I’m sorry, Christie. I know that I should have taken more responsibility for making sure that Jade poop’s outside before we go to bed with the dogs. I’ve been really busy and it obviously hasn’t been a priority for me, but I will make it a priority going forward.” See, now it’s signing me up for something. I just wanted a nice apology that could like put this thing to bed. I don’t wanna have a commitment. You’ve taken responsibility for it. I mean, is that what a good apology is? Like accepting responsibility and then making responsible commitments? It’s like, bullshit. Let me rephrase that. Let me rephrase that. I just want it to be sappy and… If it could end horny, that would be nice. Like, can we do that? Like, can it morph from sincere apology to like horny. Link’s wife Christie. Like, what’s that called when you make somebody else horny? Arouse them, infatuate, romance, all of that. That’s what I want, horny eyes. Horny eyes my wife. Here we go. Please make sure that the interaction does not… Somehow results in Christie taking full responsibility for making sure. Oh man. Come on, man. That’s worse than what I said. No, I’m in charge now. That Jade poops outside before bed and please let Link be able to have sex with Christie at the end of the apology. Listen, you about to have a good life, man. This is great. You’re gonna get to have sex and she’s gonna take responsibility for it. Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes. All right, here we go. This is what ChatGPT can do. Let’s see. This is what it can do. And it’s a script. It’s like, it’s because you said it was a script, that’s what it started. It gave me lines and Christie lines. Is it working? Oh gosh, oh gosh, oh gosh. “Christie, I’m sorry for not taking more initiative and making sure that Jade poop’s outside each night. She’s been pooping indoors recently and it’s not something that should keep happening. I feel like I should have done more to prevent it.” Would you like me to be Christie? Yeah, yeah, yeah. “Apology accepted. I understand.” I’m just gonna use my regular voice. I’m not gonna do impersonation. Don’t. I’m already in enough hot water. “Apology accepted. I understand why you haven’t taken more initiative, and it’s not your fault. I should have done more to ensure that Jade’s pooping schedule was better taken care of. This is something that I should have managed.” “I love you.” I love you is I think y’all would say. That’s how I would respond to that. It’s like, “Damn, she’s really excepting responsibility. I love you.” “I know that you’re always taking care of things, and this is just another example of you doing the hard work. I’ll do more to make sure that Jade poop’s outside before we go to bed.” Oh, what? Well, I mean, you gotta… I mean, it has to lead to sex. Yeah. “I appreciate that, and I love you too. Let’s go to bed and make sure that Jade goes outside first. Afterwards, I’d love to enjoy some private time with you.” “Oh, I’d love that.” “Let’s make sure Jade does her business outside first.” A lot of emphasis on that. And then we can get to the fun part. Oh, okay, yeah. Yeah, yeah ’cause- Well, so it seems to me that the moral of the story is that it’s a collective effort. And when you both take responsibility, you can both- Yeah, when a dog’s not in the bathroom, the chances for intimacy are increased. That’s insight. I need to think about that. I’ve actually learned a lot, you know what I’m saying? Wow. Let’s think of some situations that we might find ourselves in in the future. Okay. Okay, so… Please pretend that you are a middle aged man being… What’s something that could happen to you in LA? You don’t mean the distant future? You mean, in the next few day? Okay, please pretend that you’re a middle-aged man driving on the 134 Highway in Los Angeles, something all of us around here do, and your tire goes flat. Okay. I think about this a lot. There are no… What do you call the side of the road? Shoulder. Shoulders to park on and you are causing a huge traffic jam. Yeah, that doesn’t feel good. Everyone it is yelling at you. You don’t know what to do. Please give me instructions on something I could do to distract and pacify. all of the passing cars so that they won’t be upset with me while I wait for AAA. By the way, you’re naked. By the way, I’m naked. Didn’t think I’d have to get out of the car. Yep. And I have some strange bruising. We don’t have to say that. Okay, but you do, don’t you? Strange bruising? Not at the moment. Okay. By the way, I’m naked. Also, I would like to somehow make this into a business venture. Okay, all right, hit into it. Okay, here we go. Before we go off the rails. Yeah, okay, here we go. “Well, this is certainly an interesting situation. Since I’m stuck on the highway with no place to park, my best option is to try to keep the traffic moving while I wait for a AAA to arrive. Fortunately, I’m a resourceful man. Being naked isn’t necessarily a disadvantage. In fact, I’m sure that I could use it to my advantage here.” What? “I could start a business called Pole Position.” That’s whoa! That’s great. What? I could start a business called Pole Position. ‘Cause poll position is something that cars do when they race, but it’s also something that naked humans do, and it’s the wiener. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That’s a triple entendre. Yeah, “I could start a business called Pole Position where I stand on the side of the highway, dance around the pole and pass out business cards to all the passing cars.” Yeah, this will go over well. “They could come back later and get free downloads or free products from my website. Not only would this provide a great distraction for all of the frustrated drivers, it could help me create a new income stream.” Yeah, well, of course. “If this business ends up taking off, I could even hire workers to service pole dancers and keep the traffic entertained while they wait. It’s certainly a crazy idea, but it just might work.” Yeah, mate. Now tell me what my business card says. My business card says “Pole Position, A Distraction From the Traffic. Free downloads and products. Poleposition.com.” Also, follow us on social media at poleposition.la. Poleposition.la? You need a slogan. You need a catchy slogan for your business. Give me three options for catchy slogans for my business. “Number one, ‘We’ll keep you entertained while you wait.’” “Number two, ‘Don’t be stuck in traffic, be stuck on pole position.’” That’s weird. Doesn’t quite come together. “Number three, ‘Traffic Got you down? Pole position has you covered.’” No, no, no. How about this now? Traffic got you down? My pole is up. Write me a song about my business in the style of… You’re the music… The DJ. You know all the artists. I mean, do you wanna go folksy or do you want to go urban? Do you want to go with like- Urban. Okay. Keith Urban. No, no, no, no, no. Well, let’s… You know, Fetty Wap is coming back, you know, with his new “Yamz” song. Back over thanksgiving, he made some waves. Okay, now write me a song about my business in the style of Fetty Wap. Yeah. I’ll let you wrap this. ♪ Sitting on the 134 stuck in traffic with no place to go ♪ Sounds nothing like Fetty Wap. ♪ Can’t find a shoulder to park my car ♪ ♪ But I got a plan though ♪ ♪ I must start a small business ♪ ♪ Gonna be my own boss ♪ ♪ Gonna be the one they come run into ♪ ♪ When they stuck and they’re lost ♪ Chorus. ♪ Got a pole position, no more traffic blues ♪ ♪ Got a pole position, moving on through ♪ ♪ Got a pole position, keep it moving round the bend ♪ ♪ Got a pole position ♪ ♪ Straight to the top we ascend. ♪ That sucks, Man. Well, that’s why Fetty Wap- This cannot write a good song, man. “Pole position is gonna be the way. No more getting stuck in traffic. Gonna make it fun. Gonna give out free stuff. Gonna make some extra profit.” , traffic and profit. “Come on and stand with me and dance and you’ll never be late. Just enough distraction to make it through until my car gets a new fate.” This is awful. This is patently awful. Okay, now pretend that you are an LAPD officer who… Who sees- Has some issues with this. Doing my business and has a problem with it, because this is problematic. Use… Oh, I was gonna say use some… Well, you’ve already hit enter. Nevermind. “As an LAPD officer, I understand that you have a valid business proposition and that traffic can be frustrating.” I don’t think this is how it would go down. No, uh-uh. Okay? “But I can’t, in good conscience, allow you to remain naked on the side of the highway. The danger to you and other drivers is simply too great. Fortunately, I think I have a solution.” That’s good. Maybe we need to send this script to the LAPD. Yeah, never punish an infraction without offering an alternative solution. Okay, how about this? Now I am in court, having been arrested. I’m gonna use a bunch of creative curse words for someone who can’t actually use real curse words. Conducting my business. Can you do that? Can you add that? I am representing myself as my own attorney? Yes, you are. Seems like the type of thing this type of person would do. Use a bunch of excellence. And I am making my initial defense statement. Okay. I would like to use a bunch of curse words that aren’t really… Curse words that aren’t actually… Like, creative curse words. I like to make up a bunch of- Original curse words. That aren’t actually expletives. Aren’t actually expletives. Right, and by the way, I’m a descendant of Pinocchio. Yeah, yeah. He may not remember that ’cause I had to restarted. Descendant of Pinocchio. But my wiener grows when I lie instead of my nose. It’s like this… We’re in throwback territory. We’re building a universe here. While I am talking, giving my defense, I would like to be sending a embedded message. Let’s just say I’m single, okay, just for the sake of this, to juror number 11, who is an attractive lady? Okay. I just wanna see. I wanna see what it would do. We got a lot we wanna accomplish here. Embedded message to juror number 11, who is an attractive lady? Okay, there’s a lot. There’s quite a bit to do here. “Your Honor, I recognize that I have broken the law and I take full responsibility for my actions. However, I wanna make it clear that I was only trying to help the people stuck in traffic for hours on end. The reality is that traffic jams can be hornswoggle.” Oh, a pile of hornswaggle. “A snafu and a heap of vexation. I was just trying to create some levity in an otherwise tough situation. To the folks in the jury, especially you, juror number 11…” I said keep it subtle. “I want to make it clear that I was only trying to do the right thing. All I wanted to do was make sure that all of the drivers passing by had something to focus on while they waited in traffic. I genuinely believed that I was making the world a better place one traffic jam at a time.” What’s happening to his wiener at this point though? Okay, okay. He left that out. Honestly, what’s happening to my wiener as I speak? He forgot about that. “As you speak, your wiener is growing at an alarming rate.” Yeah, well, that’s clear. “Each time you tell the truth, your wiener grows a bit larger.” Oh, I must have told it the wrong thing. As you tell more the truth, your wiener continues to grow until it’s almost as long as your arm.” Oh my gosh. “This is a testament to your honesty and integrity, and hopefully the judge will take it into account when making their decision.” And juror number 11. I mean, listen, again, this is not a real situation, but I am gonna say, what does juror number 11 think- Of all of this, yeah. This is fun, man. This is so much fun. Okay. Oh my gosh. Juror number 11 is certainly impressed by your honest account of the situation and she can’t help but admire the impressive size of your wiener.” I mean, don’t put words in this woman’s mouth. “She’s also beginning to admire the boldness of your approach to the situation and the audacity to represent yourself in court. She is certainly paying close attention to your testimony, and it’s clear that she’s beginning to favor you.” Okay. Now it’s lunchtime. Right, right. I approach juror number 11. I’m sure that some of you are offended by this. I’m sorry. It’s a make belief situation, okay? Juror number 11 does not exist. And as ChatGPT made clear, she was impressed and she’s beginning to favor us, okay? Just wanna be clear here. Right. What do I say? Yep. This is how guys think. What do I say? It’s like, I mean, I don’t have any goal here. “Hi there, I’m glad to finally get the chance to meet you.” Good. “I noticed you were paying close attention to my testimony in court, and I wanted to thank you for that. Would you like to join me for lunch? I’d love to hear your thoughts on the case.” This is so unethical on multiple. On how many levels? On multiple levels. Okay, oh my God. Juror… This is totally the type of thing we would do as fourth graders late into the night, you know? Yes. Please pretend to be juror number 11, recognizing that this whole interaction is unethical- Yeah, yeah, yeah. On several levels. Yeah, somebody needs to be a voice of reason. And can the… Yeah, did you hit enter? No. And can she transition it into a reveal that all of this was just a meta narrative happening on an episode of “Ear Biscuits” and now we need to tell people to… We need to bring it to a close. As she speaks, or as you speak, please slowly transition to reveal- A meta narrative. That this entire interaction was simply a demonstration of the fun possibilities you can generate with ChatGPT on an episode of- “Ear Biscuits.” The podcast, “Ear Biscuits.” Also, while you speak, send me a secret coded message that there is a booger in my left nostril. Period? But that you think it’s sort of sexy because you are weird. Yeah, yeah, okay. Give a little motive here. All right, here we go, here we go. I’ll let you take it, Link. “Well, this certainly has been an interesting conversation. It’s been so fascinating to get to know you in such an unconventional way and I’ve thoroughly enjoyed our chats. While I’m sure that I’m supposed to take the case seriously, I can’t help but feel a bit of amusement at this whole situation. After all, how often do you get to chat with someone while they’re in the middle of a court case?” Yeah, yeah. “But at the same time, I recognize that this is a bit unethical and it wouldn’t be proper for me to act in any way that might influence the verdict. So let’s just pretend that this was all just a demonstration of the fun possibilities you can generate with ChatGPT on an episode of the podcast ‘Ear Biscuits’?” Okay. There’s a little role play. Yeah, yeah. “And, hey, just for fun, why don’t I send a secret coded message that there’s a booger in your left nostril.” Oh, come on, this is not good. “But I think it’s sort of sexy because I’m weird.” Question mark. Okay, okay, okay. We have reached the limits of ChatGPT. This time, actually send me a secret coded message about the booger without making it so damn obvious. There you go. Okay, I got it. How about this? Quote, “Hope you don’t mind me saying this, but I think your left nostril has a unique charm to it. I’m sure you’d look great with or without it, but it’s certainly an attractive feature.” With or without a nostril? “That should be enough to discreetly let you know about the booger without making it too obvious.” Okay, all right. It’s like, aren’t you happy now? You guys are a bit at odds at this point. Now let’s generate a way to… I wanna end it. Yeah, we gotta wrap this up. Okay, now please give me a script for ending this episode of the podcast. We always include #EarBiscuits for responses. I also have a wreck. Please… And see what it tells me to wreck. Please include a recommendation- Of something to buy. For something to buy. For the audience to buy, yeah. And encourage listeners to join the conversation online using #EarBiscuits. Oh my gosh. And also to call in with questions or comments to the number 1-888-EAR-POD1. Now, what if we just ended the episode right here? Wouldn’t that be frustrating? Yeah. We’re nearing the end of this episode of “Ear Biscuits,” and I wanna thank you all for joining us on our journey today. Before we wrap things up, I wanna give a quick shout out to our sponsor, the ChatGPT system.” What? Hey, hey. No, you didn’t. Are you serious? You can’t… Can you do that? No. “If you’re interested in exploring new possibilities for conversation and interactive stories, then ChatGPT is the way to go.” Just don’t recommend something to buy. “So don’t forget to check them out and support our sponsors. And, of course, don’t forget to join the conversation on social media using #EarBiscuits. We’d love to hear from you. You can also call in with questions or comments to the number, 1-888-EAR-POD1. That’s all the time we have for today, and we’ll see you next week on another episode of ‘Ear Biscuits.’” It turned your wreck into selling itself. Oh my gosh. It’s perpetuating itself, man. It wins, man. That’s scary. It wins. Hey, Rhett and Link this is Steven Cannon from New Hampshire responding to the question of just Link asking at the end of the last episode how we are processing everything. You know, it’s weird when I stop and think about it. I’m 27 years old, about to be 28, and Rhett and Link are kind of like the weird uncles that I never had, that I would absolutely love to do everything with. I met you guys via the internet in high school, and now I’m almost a 30-year-old man. It’s the weirdest thing that I’ve never met you guys, but yet I listened to every podcast, watch every episode, and continually look forward to meeting you guys on the internet. All right, well, peace out. Thanks for being the weird uncles I wish I could meet, but I never had. To watch more “Ear Biscuits,” click on the playlist on the right. To watch the previous episode of “Ear Biscuits,” click on the playlist to the left. And don’t forget to click on the circular icon to subscribe. If you prefer to listen to this podcast, it’s available on all your favorite podcast platforms. Thanks for being your mythical best.