Welcome to Ear Biscuits, the podcast where two lifelong friends talk about life for a long time, I’m Rhett And I’m Link, this week at the round table of dim lighting, I went viral, man. Thanks to you. Yep. And thanks to apparently It’s all my fault How people like to pick apart my look on the internet. I don’t wanna waste any time, I ask you, I wanna get into it, I ask you to take some pictures of me. This is a vulnerable moment. It was a little, I was like, But I am a semi-professional photographer, I texted, I take any opportunity. I texted Rhett the morning that I wanted to have some pictures taken of me. I said, can you bring that camera, man? Listen, I always have my camera. I know you like to use that camera of yours. Not the film camera, you replaced it with a digital camera that, That people still think is my film camera. Okay, yeah. And I did that on purpose. Oh, you did? So I knew you’d be into it. And I knew that would kind of help ease the awkwardness of me asking my friend, you, to take pictures of me for me to put on Instagram Hey, listen, it wouldn’t have been awkward for me even if it was just, hey, take this phone. I felt, you know, I’m like, I wanted to show off my completed tattoo. I wanted to show off Michael Mendoza’s work, Our boy, he tattoos both of us, as well as Ben. Yep. ‘Cause I wanted to post it so that he could, I was like, hey, wait on posting your stuff until I can get the picture that I want so that I can have that posted. And I was like, well, I’m gonna wear a tank top. Right, because his pictures tend to be just of the tattoo, like here, the tattoo’s done, here it is. It’s not really like tattoo in context, making the subject look cool. Yeah. And I think part of it, Or, not necessarily look cool, but look any way that people perceive it to look apparently. Who knew, right? Oh, I didn’t even put the timer on, Link. I probably could’ve known a little bit. We’re at the creative house, we’re doing a photo shoot for something else that’s very exciting. An unannounced project. Very exciting, something that’s in development. It’s a product, long time coming. Not as long time coming as the cookbook, which super excited that that’s finally out we can talk about the fact there’s a mythical cookbook. But anyway, yeah. I’m like, okay, hey, we took the pictures for the thing, now why don’t you come over here and take some pictures of me in my tank top. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Well take some pictures of my tattoo and I’m in a tank top. I know, I did feel a little, it’s like everybody, You didn’t know what faces to make. I didn’t know what faces to make and I was like, I don’t want this to be too modely, but I wanna model this tattoo. And I’m gonna tuck my tank top into my pants like an old man gardening. Yep. And yeah, I picked this one. And then, Well, let me, I’ll just give you, Did you know when you were taking my photo that this thing was gonna get over 10 million views on Twitter? No, well, Over 11 million. Maybe over 15 million, I don’t know. I’ll give you my perspective as the photographer in this particular situation. And my go-to filter, yes, I use the built-in, I think I already said this, but like, yes, it’s just a Fuji film camera where you dial in these film simulations. And my go-to film simulation is ’70s summer. ’70s summer. ‘Cause it has this little bit of a vintage feel. It warms everything up. It makes everybody and everything look cool. And so I was like, when you gave me this mission, I was like, I knew I could count on you. We gotta get some foliage in the background to complement The foliage on my arm. Yeah, exactly, it was just very themed. And you know, you were making a lot of different faces. I mean, I probably took 20, 25 pictures. And then I looked at the pictures and I was like, And I gave ’em all to you. I don’t like my face, take some more pictures. And then I took goofy face pictures. Well, yeah, you did some where you were smiling too big, and I was like, no, kind of just look, I mean, don’t try to look cool, just like you don’t care that a picture’s being taken of you. That’s right, that’s right, that’s what I needed. And turns out we had already had it. I mean, we had some too modely ones. We had some that were just too low light. And then we had some that were too goofy. Christy and I went to breakfast one morning, I’m like, listen, I want to show you these pictures. I want you to help me pick out which ones of these I’m gonna post on my IG. And then the first one, RussoGoob is the Twitter handle, X handle, I’m not gonna say that, Twitter handle. I do not know Russo, but thank you for saying, OMG dot, dot, dot, dot, dot, dot, dot, the tattoo, and putting it on Twitter ’cause I didn’t put anything on Twitter. And so that was all about the tattoo. Right, right, right. And I appreciated the compliment, Russo. And then it was, and that started going, I don’t really, I don’t go on Twitter anymore. Once it became X, like I kind of gave up on it. Like I rarely, rarely, rarely ever go over there. I spend a lot less time over there myself. Thanks, Elon. It was retweeted by Weird Val, who said, I thought this was a beautiful butch woman, but turns out it’s that twink from Good Mythical Morning. Oh wow. And then I scroll down, I’m like, 11 million views. And then, Wow. Yeah, and then Russo’s like, yeah, I didn’t wanna say that, but I was thinking the same thing. Both, both butch and twink? Yeah. Or just, which one do you think they were thinking? I think, I don’t know, a lot of people, like to say twink because it rhymes with Link and ink. But the beauty of the tweet and now I’m moving to my semi-professional comedian POV. Yeah, let’s, okay, here you go. From semi-professional photographer to semi-professional comedian. Yeah, let’s hear it, let’s hear it. The beauty of this tweet is the fact that you were both called a gay woman and a gay man at the same time. Yeah. And it just worked. Pretty cool. It was like just so beautifully constructed. Yeah, yeah, and I can’t say that I knew that was gonna happen. I get the Rachel Maddow comparisons and never met Maddow, but I think maybe we’d be kindred spirits. I really don’t know anything about Rachel Maddow except the picture of Rachel next to the picture of me in split screen when people think they’re being cute and doing that. Yeah, yeah, yeah. On the internet. I think your hair has kind of diverged a little bit at this point. Here’s the thing, Everybody knows I love lesbians, but I don’t sweat labels ’cause sweat makes you stink and the only stink that I follow is my instincts. Oh, okay. And that’s what I’m doing, baby. Like this is a tribute to my wife to put this tattoo on my arm. I love attention, to get over 10 million people putting their eyeballs on this wonderful tattoo that I’m super proud of, put any label on it you want, I do not care. Now, I’ll be honest, I was tempted to care. Oh, tempted to care In what way? I was like, what, am I, what is this supposed to mean about me? Like, I’m talking to Lily on FaceTime and I’m like, did you see that I posted my tattoo? And she’s like, yeah, like 20 million views on Twitter. And I was like, am I supposed to? And I was in this moment, I was in this moment of, is something being said about me that I need to understand? And that’s where I’ve landed. I don’t sweat the labels. Okay, but which one do you identify with more? Butch or twink? Because that’s the question that the people have. Well, based on my research, a twink is like a young, hairless, Go on. gay man, young hairless, gay man. Hold on, let’s see. And I am a middle-aged, hairy, straight man. Can I just be more specific according to, Yes. Oxford, is this the, well, this is just the first definition that comes up. It says definition is from Oxford languages. Look at you dadding your way through figuring out what a twink is. Informal, it is and informal definition. It is pronounced twink. It is a noun, it is from the US, it’s from the US. Among gay men is the first thing in parentheses. Yep, yep, yep. A gay or bisexual young man with a slim build and youthful appearance. Okay, I do have a youthful appearance, I think, Thank you. Again, now I’m just going to, But I have body hair. Right. I’m not hairless, But now I’m adopting just my semi-professional person POV. But I do like to remove hair from my body. I think the reason that you might From everywhere. Be mistaken as a butch lesbian, My toes, my feet. And a twink, My bush. Or a twink is your slim build and youthful appearance. Yep, yep. I think that is the, I think that’s the general, I think that’s where it happens. Now, there is a corollary here because we were talking about how my fashion instincts are to go less dressy because I don’t want to push boyish. I want to counteract boyishness. And now I never thought I was trying to counteract twinkishness. But I guess in a roundabout way, like going around my sexual orientation to twinkdom, I am trying to circumvent, I’m just trying to circumvent boyness, you know, I’m a middle-aged man. Yeah, but why? But why? Well, it has nothing to do with being twink or being thought of as being gay. It has absolutely nothing to do with that. It just has to do with, am I a boy or a man? Well, I’m a man. I’m a man. You have a youthful, I’m a youthful, You have a youthful vibe. I have a youthful exuberance And a youthful look. I also think that when you see me in action, you know that I’m not a lesbian. But I could be, What kind of action are you talking about? But I could be a, Are we talking about sports action? Like not in a photograph. Because I think if I saw, Like in a moving, in a video. No, no, I’m saying if I saw you from a distance playing tennis, I would probably assume you were a lesbian from a distance. Okay, like eye squint? Right, I’d be like look at her go . I’m just saying, I could see that happening. Yeah. You know what I’m saying? So in tennis action, or maybe let’s update it, pickleball. If I saw you pickleballing from a distance, I might be tempted to think lesbian. Okay. Nothing, I’m just, nothing Wrong with that. Because of the hair style, the hair is up and it’s short. Yeah. Rachel Maddow. think that, yeah, I think the hair comes, the hair influences the lesbian interpretation and the slim build influences the twink. But do they cancel each other out and just make a man? I think that’s how men are made. Is that what you’re, so every man is essentially just a combination of a butch lesbian and a twink. Listen, I got this tattoo as a tribute to my wife. I knew That’s the other piece of it. I knew that it was The nature of the tattoo. The nature of the tattoo is it’s more feminine. The tattoo itself, like getting plants on your arm was me getting in touch with my feminine side. Now it turns out that my feminine side is a butch lesbian. But a butch lesbian is a non feminine, a less feminine lesbian. Exactly. Exactly. I gotta start taking notes. My feminine side is my wife Christy, which is what my caption said. So. Okay. Okay. But I do identify, I don’t identify as a butch lesbian, but I’m closer to a butch lesbian than a male twink, which I think is a bit redundant. Uh huh, okay. Of course, you can tell me all you want by calling and leaving us a voicemail. 1-8888-EARPOD, I know I said one too many eights. Yeah, yeah, well, you got it. EARPOD-1. I do think it was a great photo, well composed. Yeah, because you took it. Great lighting. You took it. I mean, I’ll post the rejects. Some get goofy and some get too modely, but, and then you can see, you can rate each one. I think this is a victory On a scale of twink to butch to just me. All I can say for certain is that I’m me, I’m following my instinct. I think this is a victory for you, Link. Dig your nose in it. I mean, first of all, as you stated right at the top of this, you like attention. I mean, so do I. We sort of like, we kind of make our living off of attention. So getting it, and I don’t think this is bad attention. Right, right. That’s great. And I think a lot of things converged in this tweet. ‘Cause one of the things that converged was because we’ve been doing this for so long, we come in and out of people’s worlds. So it’s like, I used to watch those guys, That twink from Good Mythical Morning When I was, 10 years ago, whatever, right. And like some of these people are like 25, 20. I watched you when I was 10, I watched you when I was 15. And we were different, we were different, we have evolved, we have changed, the show has changed. The nature of the way that we express ourself has changed. The nature of the way that we look has changed. And so I think that Also the way that we talk and our level of inclusivity. Like if you would’ve told me at the beginning of our career, if you would’ve showed me a picture of me wearing a T-shirt that said everybody knows I love lesbians, and I’m like smirking at Stevie, I’d be like, oh my God, what’s , I’m so scared right now. And now I’m like, I’m so living my best life right now. That’s it. But I think that, But we look different. I think that people just, it still, to this day, it is the most common thing is that I used to watch you, right. Mm hmm, sadly. Or you were my childhood. And again, there’s many reasons for that. But I think that eventually you don’t watch somebody forever and you decide that we’re not for you anymore. That’s great, go find other ways to be entertained. I’m all for it. But then, we just keep popping up on the internet in different ways. And in this way, you end up popping up and with this tattoo, and it’s just like, I think for some people it’s like, what, that guy from my 10 years ago has that tattoo? That’s one thing that happens, right. Yeah. And so I think it was just a perfect convergence of multiple things. This is something to be celebrated. It was a maelstrom of femininity. Get it, male fem, I don’t know. It’s been bookmarked over 3,000 times, so a lot of people wanna keep going back to this. Yeah, I will say, I mean my only issue with the whole process is the fact that I had to comment on it on Instagram to get my photog cred. That’s the only, I mean that’s my only beef in any of this. Well, I was gonna do it, but I didn’t know what term to assign to you. Is it a bear, what are you? When you’re the gay dude with the beard, what is that? Yeah, but bears are more heavyset. Oh no, a beard is when you are gay but you have a cover. Yeah, like you have a wife or another. Yeah, so a bear is a little bit stockier than. Stockier, you’re somewhere between an otter and a bear, I would say. Otter and a bear. An otter is like a slimmer, hairy gay man. And what if he was a lesbian? I’m not hairy enough. What would he be? A lesbian, lumberjack lesbian, I would say. Yeah. Lumberjack lesbian. Yeah. And a butch lesbian, see, I started looking up butch lesbian pictures and a lot of blazers, lots of vests. I don’t do vests. Not yet, we don’t know what’s gonna happen with you. A lot of ties, sometimes bow ties. Yeah, I feel like butch nowadays is more like, they’re more business casual in dress. And that’s not your vibe. But an occasional tank. Yes. And I think that’s where I got roped in. I think you should just roll with it. I am. Hey, here I am at the party. All you have to do is you just put a little, you just do the camera icon emoji, colon, and then the person’s name. That’s all you have to do next time. My otter friend, RhettMC. Photo-ter-froger. Fo-to-ter. My photo-ter-froger. Yeah, we’ll work on that. Yeah, but getting the pictures of yourself, now first of all, we take a lot of pictures together and individually to promote merch. And I will be frank with you, it is my least favorite part of our job. I don’t like having pictures taken of me. I don’t have enough faces. I don’t like the way I look in 94% of pictures. Sometimes I get it just right and I’m happy with it. But like, I just don’t have a lot, . Yeah, we prefer more dramatic lighting than the merch photos. When I smile, you can’t see my teeth. There’s a number of things that I’m not particularly pleased with the way I show up in photos, okay. But I’ve had to get my picture taken professionally just of me for James and the Shame stuff. And I’ve just had to grow comfortable with this, like, making faces, and again, my bag of faces is very small. You should just try a bag over your face. But just growing comfortable with like, yes, I’m kind of doing a little bit of the model thing right now. And so, especially when you’ve got a good photographer, I’m not talking about a semi-professional best friend, I’m talking about an actual professional. When you get somebody who’s a professional and you’re like, if I make the right face, this is really gonna turn out well. And they’re gonna take enough pictures where out of 500 I might get 20 that I’m happy with. Now, you didn’t part your lips. I will give you credit for that. I think that would’ve been too far. What are you talking about? Like your lips are like. In what picture are you talking about? Any of ’em, I never saw your lips parted, like, Oh, I have a couple. ‘Cause there’s one thing that’s like, I mean, there’s the blue steel, there’s like the, like the smoochie face type thing. But then there’s also just the parted lip. Well, this is a good time to talk about this because I feel like I need to consult with you. Did you part your lips and I didn’t notice it? I don’t think in any of the pictures I’ve posted in the last roundup. If the lips are touching, you’re not being too pretentious If they start parting, I don’t open my mouth quite a bit. Quite a bit, I don’t open my mouth a lot because, I’m reinforcing that instinct. Because you can’t see my teeth. And so if I had like a nice big, beautiful smile, I probably would smile more. But one of the pictures that made it into the set of approved pictures is, ’cause I have probably like 25 pictures that came out of this photo shoot that’s supposed to cover basically anything that I’m doing related to the EP. And so I’m like, I’m gonna kind of meter these out a little bit over time. And one of them is way too, it looks like I’m trying way too hard to be sexy. But I included it in the final picks ’cause I was like, okay, this is an extreme thing. And I showed it to Jessie and she was like, you look great, but that, and I was like, it’s too much, right? I’m not gonna post this, I’m not gonna post this picture because I don’t want to deal with whatever thing I’m putting out there with this picture. But I’ll show it to just you and then you can decide. You can decide if as a, We’re putting it all out there, man. As an experiment, not as an experiment, just of fulfill this whole thing. Let’s face it, what what we’re really talking about here is, Oh God. How do you get more people that are attracted to you to like it, like we’re in thirst trap territory, but not go so far that the people who like you not for what you look like, let’s just say the guys’ guys out there, you don’t want to turn them off. You want the guys’ guys to like your picture. And you want the people who are attracted to you. It’s not great in terms of The thirsty and what’s the other category? You got the thirsty people who want the sexy picture and then you want people who are turned off by the sexy picture because they just want to be your friend and respect you as some dude. The dude-esque and the thirsty are in conflict. Yeah, but also like, I don’t know, I think it’s just like how do you want yourself to be perceived, right. Because you’ve got people, like, As a butch lesbian, are you asking me again? Yeah, yeah. No, okay. You’ve got people like Emma, right, and obviously Emma is a legit fashion icon now. And she’s constantly getting pictures of her taken by people, like by professional fashion photographers for professional fashion outlets. And everybody is like, you go girl. But if Jared Litto, Leto, Lito, I think it’s Leto. Posts his pictures, I’m like, my eyes just roll outta my head, dude, I’m just being honest. Well, he’s also 51. Well, that’s a feat. So I give him respect for that. But it’s just like, okay, it seems a little pretentious. It seems a little, it seems like he might be full of himself. So it’s like, I’m not thirsty for that. I’m over hydrated by that. But you also know, I’m wet, no, I’m not wetted. You’re not wet. I’m dry but I’m, Oh, hold on, you’re wet for Jared Leto because we need to add that to the, I’m dry for Jared Leto, but I’m not thirsty for him. The opposite of thirsty is wet. So am I wet for Jared Leto or am I dry for him? I just think you’re already satisfied with something else. You’re not, no. I am anti thirsty for Jared Leto because he goes too far. Well, he’s also an actor. Emma is a creator, right, and we have her audience, I mean, we know Emma, but she is who she is on her podcast in real life. So it’s this authentic person that there’s no pretense. She gives you all sides. There’s no pretense to the person that she puts out there on a regular basis. So when she puts out this high fashion, Let’s call it glammed. She’s been un-glammed and fully glammed on the cam. And if you just saw it and you would be like, what, why is this girl making these faces and this thing? It’s like, well, ’cause that’s how you do that thing. Exactly. When you do what she’s doing, you do it in the way, and she’s doing a really damn good job of it. Great job, but it’s harder for a guy to pull that off. Lemme see the picture. Okay, so let me just say that I, You said a lot. Well, I’ll just say that, Lemme see the picture. I don’t think the framing is great on this, and I, no, no, I’m saying, Well, just let me give the notes. It’s the face. Don’t tell me the notes. Don’t comment on the fact that it’s not a very flattering picture in terms of the bottom part. Just I’m talking about my facial expression. What’s the bottom part? You’ll see what I’m saying. It’s one of those things that the way the shirt is sort of expanding. Just give me a minute. I think this is, I think this is, this is okay. Your lips aren’t parted. Yeah, but, I don’t know, man. = It’s pelvis forward, that’s kind of the issue. And yeah, because the jacket’s open, you’re going, there’s an illusion of over-wideness that’s not true to your actual width. Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. So yeah, the comp, yeah. It’s not a particularly flattering picture for my body. But I’m just talking about the express-, I was just like, I’ll pick this one. Maybe it could be cropped at some point. It’s modelesque. Right, and some-, But it’s not over the top. Oh. It’s right, if I saw this on Instagram, I’d scroll quickly because this is not the you, Oh, this would make you uncomfortable? Not uncomfortable, it’s just, I’m a little too close to it to celebrate it, you know? I don’t know. Maybe it’s my problem. Well, okay, but, okay, so we should talk about this. But I think it’s nice. I don’t think I’m gonna post this. I think the other photos are nice, But we have talked about, and I don’t know, we haven’t personally actively pursued this, but we are definitely open to if, Centerfold. No. If GQ was doing a creator issue or whatever, and they were like, we’re gonna take modelesque pictures. Well, Forbes did that to us. The one that they used was like, oh, it’s like, fix your hair in this one. That’s the one they used. I was like, I thought they were just telling me to fix my hair. But also, I don’t know how many people realize that it was a mirror. I think people thought I was holding a picture of you because you couldn’t see you in the foreground. But we did look good, so I’m like, ultimately I like flattering photos of myself. I mean, I do like that. And it turns out I also like wearing eye makeup and making a blue steel face. But that is a, I want to acknowledge that that’s an update, right, because 12, 13 years ago almost when we came to this town and remember we went to that, actually before we moved here, first time we ever got head shots. And of course we went to that guy’s apartment in Hollywood, off of Hollywood Boulevard and went up to his apartment, which was, it was a legitimate photographer, but we got head shots and we did the whole back to back thing, Definitely felt weird. We’ve told that story. But we were super self-conscious about trying to come across in any way other than we are not taking ourselves seriously. We don’t think we look good and we’re just funny guys. We’re a comedic duo, but yeah, you could tell. But yeah, but look at what you’re doing to your hair. Look at what you’re doing to yourself. Right, and I think, Let’s be real. So the point I’m making is I feel like when I, We always teetered When people make themselves, like when I know who a person is truly in other contexts, and I think this applies to guys too, ’cause I think you could use Anthony as an example of this. Okay, Anthony Bourdain, I’m just thinking of the Padilla Anthony ’cause Bourdain has been dead for quite some time. And so obviously Anthony goes to Prague and gets these very particular tattoos that cover his entire body and then shows them off. You gotta be shirtless to show it off. And he shows ’em off shirtless. And these are modelesque pictures of him. ‘Cause it sounds like when you talk about Leto, it sounds like you were introducing a double standard for men and women. Yes. So you are introducing? Now is this coming from your butch part or your twink part? I was teeing up the double standard as the challenge. I’m not saying that it’s, yes I have it, but it also exists. And so, but I know Anthony, right, and so when I see those pictures, Girls like girls who go full glam but guys don’t like guys who go full glam. But who cares what guys think? Well, if you have an audience and you wanna reach people broadly, it’s a factor for us. But yeah, I mean that’s why when I did the, when we went to that ball, the masquerade ball and the idea was to wear the eye makeup and to honestly use Jared Leto as a reference. Anna had a picture of Jared Leto on the wall when we were getting our makeup done. It’s just the attitude that goes along with it. And I was uncomfortable with it obviously, you can tell by the pictures taken on the red carpet I was like, if I’m gonna do this, I’ve gotta make the face, I gotta go all the way. And I had a lot of fun with it. You also made a hand signal, Right, because I also wasn’t taking myself too seriously and that’s what the hand signal was. It was, I wanted to go more, it’s like I’m not a big fan of David Bowie’s music, I’m just not into it. But I’m a big fan of David Bowie’s vibe. The fact that he just kept you guessing, and he subverted norms, and he bent gender, I guess you would say. Well, of course, definitely did. I’ve been doing that. I’ve done that a few times. I did the drag thing. It was fun, it was fun. But are you saying that you, It doesn’t make me gay, bi, tran, it doesn’t make me anything that I’m not and who cares. Right, but are you saying that, It’s fun. But it’s one thing to do drag as a onetime thing. But it’s another thing to be like, in my everyday vibe, I’m gonna make some androgynous choices. Yeah but, so going to a masquerade ball that had a theme that was served by eye makeup, it was just a fun little excursion that I fully committed to. I enjoyed it, like once we got to, just for context, it was this fundraiser event that we went to where whenever you get invited to one of these things, they give you the dress code and the dress code was very specific. It was Zodiac ball. But it was avant-garde black tie with, there was a competition to see who had the best costume. And it was like, lean into the zodiac, lean into the celestial nature of it. And so we were like, okay, let’s do, and I think Stevie was the first person to say, let’s do something where it’s all themed and let’s actually get somebody so we got Daniel Solana come in who did “Buddy System.” Wardrobe for “Buddy System” and then for GMM for a while back when we just didn’t pick our own clothes like we do now. He’s gone on to do a bunch of Marvel costuming. Yeah, he’s done like he did costuming for, What happened was Marvel saw my “Buddy System” season two robot costumes that he made and they were like, we got to have that. Yeah, I think that, yeah, so I totally get what you’re saying in terms of the, well, so we did the thing where it was essentially black velvet and then covered in these interesting sort of vibes. Cosmotic, scars, The eye makeup matched the thing. My main reason that I was a bit of, first of all, I was just uncomfortable ’cause I don’t like to draw attention to my, I do like to be the center of attention as much as any per person who entertains people and thinks that them talking on the internet is worth you listening to. But when it comes to my look, I kind of want to be like, if you decide to look at me, you will be pleased, but I don’t want you to, you’re already gonna probably be looking at me ’cause I’m a foot taller than everybody in the room. And so there’s just this thing that is I’m a little bit like, I don’t want to do something that makes me bigger and stand out more. And so I’ve always been a little bit self-conscious about that. So this was a harder thing for me to commit to. But once we got there and everybody, first of all, everyone looked like crazy people. I mean it was nuts, it was nuts. It was the most nuts thing I’ve ever been to. But we got a lot of compliments and it was cool to kind of be the three of us together being like a team, looking a certain way or whatever. People wanted to get pictures. Yeah, it helped being in a set. But there is this interesting, you’re kind of talking about the members of our audience that might draw certain conclusions that ultimately would lead them to being less of a fan, or not being a fan, or not choosing to watch the next thing, which it’s very difficult to not consider that. But for me, there’s always the, there’s that old, like you were getting at, the old version of yourself that suddenly, in fact, I even said it that night when we were at the thing. I was like, if we could go back 15 years and suddenly just be have footage of what is happening right now, this ridiculous event, well, it wasn’t ridiculous, it was for a good cause, it was for treating childhood cancer. So it was a great cause. But the nature of where it was, and who was there, and what we looked like was so beyond the pale of anything we would’ve ever expected to be involved in. And so that person, that former person is always sort of standing in judgment of the current you. And it’s kind of hard to know where that nets out because that there’s nothing wrong with any of the things that we did. It’s just the comfort level is something that evolves over time. Like going to a big party and wearing this thing that has all these adornments on it and with eye makeup isn’t something that I envisioned for myself 20 years ago. I’m happy that I’m able to do it and I enjoyed it once I made the decision but you kind of have to tell the old you, it’s okay, everything’s okay, everything’s okay everything is fine, this is great. Why would you care? Why would you care what your old self thinks about this? So I’m glad that we did it ultimately, it was fun. You should have pursed your lips a little more. You maybe should have parted ’em. I think I did for some of them, it’s just the, You should have had a hand signal The photos that make it onto the internet, they got me smiling because you were making the hand signal and I was laughing at you in the moment and then they took a picture. You were mostly concerned about that hand signal at that moment. Well I was saying like, oh here you go, you’re making that hand signal, and I laughed, and they took a picture Because I went through a bunch of hand signals ’cause I didn’t want to do anything offensive. You probably did something offensive in some culture. Well, you know what, you can make everybody happy all the time, but it’ll drive you crazy. Okay, I have a very special update for you in a moment, updating you on something that happened that we talked about last week. I want to remind you that we’ve been doing the pin of the month every month this year. It’s proven to be very popular with the mythical beasts. And we decided to create a corkboard, a mythical themed corkboard, a collector’s board. We’re saying that it’s for the pins of the month that you’ve collected, but let’s be honest, it’s for anything that you wanna put in cork. 14-inch diameter, I wish I had one right now because I love the feeling of this thing. It’s flexible lightweight cork. It’s palpably floppy. It’s great, they didn’t make cork like that when we were coming up. This is the new cork, available at mythical.com, Featuring new cork. Also, we wanna remind you, as we have been lately, and thank you for those of you who have actually answered the call on this, if you like this podcast, rating it and reviewing it wherever you enjoy the podcast, even places that you don’t enjoy the podcast, go over there and do it, as well. It helps, it gets the podcast out there to more people. So we’ve seen an increase in that. People are listening, so thank you for doing that. We would love more of it. Okay. Thank you. Ear Biscuits is supported by Rosetta Stone. There are a whole host of reasons that you might wanna learn a new language. Maybe you’re traveling to a place and you want to be able to speak the language. Maybe you’ve met someone, maybe you’re falling in love with someone who speaks another language. That’s a good idea. Or maybe you just want to guard your brain against decay because learning a language can do that. In comes Rosetta Stone. 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That’s $179 for unlimited access to 25 language courses for the rest of your life. Redeem your 40% off at rosettastone.com/ear today. Ear Biscuits is supported by Manscaped Gentlemen across the nation, we have an urgent message for you. The brand that took your balls to space is now launching them into the ultrasphere. Introducing the lawnmower 5.0 Ultra. That was a dramatic reading. Yep. What I’m gonna say is from the heart. You know we talked about Manscaped and using it when it wasn’t a sponsor and said we wanted it to be a sponsor And now it is. And here we are. The Lawnmower 5.0 Ultra featuring a new cutting-edge design and next generation dual skin-safe blade heads for different shaves is pretty much a spaceship to take your boys downstairs to the next level. Join the nine million men worldwide who trust Manscaped with the brand new Lawnmower 5.0 Ultra by going to manscaped.com for 20% off plus free shipping with the code ear. Ear. High tech for low places, Manscaped. 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One of the things I’ve discovered about buying things on, first of all, Instagram, usually pretty reliable ’cause it links correctly to a legit store. TikTok, the standards are a little bit different. I’ve only bought a couple of things from a TikTok ad and this has been, it’s been six weeks and these things have not come. And I paid $20 for them. So I paid $20 for a pair of shoes on TikTok. You would think Why did you? You would think that they would be here by now. But maybe not, because maybe I paid nothing for shipping. Maybe that’s my problem. Anyway, I’m still waiting on my $20 loafers. Then why did you tell me not to look at your feet? Well because, was visiting Locke recently, for a little parents’ weekend. And I was in the hot and humid south and we took him, what we did is we took him to Nordstrom Rack because when you go see your kid, you want to take ’em to Nordstrom Rack, Marshalls, and T.J. Maxx to get them cheap clothing. to kinda take ’em out shopping a little bit, give ’em some clothes for their life. Went to the Rack, which is probably the best of those three options. This kinda goes Marshall’s, T.J. Maxx, and then Nordstrom Rack. And it’s helpful to start at Marshall’s, I think, and work your way up. You don’t wanna go backwards. You get that Marshalls effect. It’s like, gah, why am I here? But I went to the shoe section. You know what rolls downhill? Yeah. Products to Marshalls. I went to the shoe section and something just called my name and it was $20 loafers. Well, no, I’m gonna hand you the loafers and you can look on the inside and see the price tag and read it out to everyone. But let me just say, Link, Am I returning them? I wore these loafers in the, it was like 85 degrees, 85% humidity. I wore them a day down there. Then I came back and I wore them all day yesterday and then I put them on again today. Always sockless. I’ve been going completely sockless. I’ve been raw dogging the hell out of these shoes. And I gotta say, No, let me say, I’m gonna hand you one and I would like you to smell it. I would also like you, Your preambles are always manipulative. So don’t tell me what you think it smells like. I don’t, you can just, I have the loafer. It appears to be $20 in value. Nope, 49.97. The Mr. Lancer Leah, tan leather, 40791868043. This is a $50 loafer and it feels like a million bucks. It’s soft, it’s supple, it fully bends, it’s packable. You don’t have to fold it to pack it, though. This is what they show you in the ads. The bottom has some sort of Rubber. Rubber. And it is. Some sort of rubber. It comes in little waffle pieces. Bottom smells new. Wow, bottom smells new. I actually did step in shit with that yesterday. Oh really? Yeah. Very cleanable. It is completely shitless. Sean shit on the bathroom floor and I stepped in it with that foot. And you know what, there is a little bit of thread But I cleaned it. That would hold maybe a little shit residue. Oh, you stepped on it with the heel. No, it was the toe. Oh. It was the toe. But I think I got rid of it ’cause I thought about, You did good. I was picturing this moment, and I was, I didn’t want the shit to really stain this moment. All right, and you do have the other one? Yeah, yeah, I have it on, I’ll hold that one up. They come in a pair and now I’m going in for the, don’t distract from this moment, this is the big moment. Okay, yeah, yeah, yeah, smell it. I’m going in for the in-scent, I call it. Going back in for a second . I’m gonna clear completely , empty my lungs completely. Unnecessary. Get a little mouth. Put your hand inside of ’em. Don’t tell me what to do, shut up. Feel inside. And the scent is of leather. Nothing but. Go deep with your hand, go all the way to the toe. I’m going for the hand. I will be removing my ring. Don’t dry ’em out. Left shoe. Don’t give ’em time to dry out. I want the people to know that this is just fresh off the foot. Ooh, it’s soft in there. Ooh. Supple, huh? 50 bucks for that. I mean, it’s not 20. I’m detecting moisture but is that just the supple nature of the sole? Detecting moisture? I think it might just be the, okay, and then what is this? Do you feel how my toes have already made a little indention there? You feel that? What is going on here? If I just, Hold on, wat are you doing? Trying to get the tag out. No, no, leave the tag on You gonna return ’em? No, no, no, I took this one off, but as you can see, it took a while. It took me good 12 minutes to get the tag off of this. It feels damp, but I think it, That’s you. It’s just a coolness. I think that’s me. I think that must be my dampness. I’ll be damned. Link, I gotta, I’ll be damp. Link, I gotta tell you, That right there, and does your foot, let me smell the foot. My foot is sweatier now that I’ve taken them off than when they’re on and I don’t know what’s happening. It is magic. Does your foot smell like a shoe? I mean, You don’t wanna put your foot up here? No. You haven’t got a pedicure? I will. Okay, the foot’s here now. I think it smells fine. I mean, I washed it recently and it’s just been in that, it’s been inside the shoe. I’m clearing, emptying the lungs. Don’t lick it, that was nasty. Yeah, Sextember is over. You know what, your foot smells like leather. Yeah, and it feels like gold. I mean, Link, Well it’s a little sticky now that I’ve removed half of the, Well, yeah, They shouldn’t have put that there. That’ll go away. I gotta hand it to you. Your foot is in a great spot and I am jealous. This is what Mark Margiotti, whatever his name is, this is what he must feel like all the time. This is also what Flanagan feels like all the time, by the way. ‘Cause he wears these sort of driving, I went with the most casual, I’m gonna make my hair smell like leather. Most comfortable driving loafer to begin with. Well, I went with it $50 loafer. Because it was $50. That’s kind of, that’s reasonable. My next, once these kind of break in, I will say they are thin. There’s a feeling of no shoes on, which I think is good for your feet. You can feel the gas pedal of your Lamborghini. But these have the moccasin toe. Or your hybrid Volvo, I think is what it actually is. And I’m gonna get the one that’s a little less casual, that has the leather bottom and not the rubber bottom. That’s phase two for me. I don’t know what phase three is. I’m staying away, I’m staying away, but I am jealous as hell. Let me just say it’s kind of weird. It’s because it literally is having, I think it’s gonna Skin on your skin. It would send me in in total twink territory if I did that. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Rich twink. I can’t do it. This would be pretty twinky. I can’t do it. This would be pretty twinky. I can’t do it. I don’t know how it works. I think that there’s probably people out there who have experienced this before, putting a leather loafer on and being like, I mean, I’m wearing it in South Florida. It’s like 90 degrees, I’m walking around, my feet smell fine. I mean, I know it’s early days. This is day three. Yeah, it is early. But don’t, you’re not gonna It’s not sweating. Put any powder, you’re not gonna make any putty. I’m still wearing mine and they’re starting to break in. They’re starting to smell funny. Which ones are you wearing? The black athletic ones. Oh, you’re wearing those without socks? Yep. I don’t know, I think there’s something about the leather. And I think people knew this. I think people have known this. Now we know it. I’m just feeling really good right now. I hate you for this. In fact, I wore ’em the first day and then we got there and I set ’em next to the bed and I got in bed and I had never had this feeling in my life. You making ’em night shoes? I looked at ’em and I was like, I wanna put you on right now. In bed? I didn’t, but I just saw ’em on the ground and I was like, I’ve never had the urge to put shoes on while in bed without shoes on. Hey, it’s called knocking the boots. That’s the first time. It can be any shoe, knocking the loafers, man. I just looked at ’em and I really, Body rocking, knocking the loafers. I’m gonna stand up ’cause I told you not to look at my shoes or say anything about my shoes. I just want you to, I want you to think about me as a person you don’t know. And I’m just gonna walk up to you. And I want you to, ’cause I think you would probably have thoughts about the shoes. In this context, just jeans and a black T-shirt, not trying too hard and just like, Stay further. And maybe I’m hailing a cab ’cause I don’t have the Uber app yet. You know what, this is squarely you. Oh. This is squarely you. This is like zero overlap between the two of us. I’m jealous, but I could never do that. What are you talking about? I could never do that. It just wouldn’t look like that on me. Well, what does it look like? You haven’t told me yet. Good, man, I said it, I said squarely you. I’m not here to stroke your ego. The studio’s not designed to get closeups of feet. There we go. Yeah. Now take a couple steps. Just sort of walking around a little bit. That’s enough, that’s enough steps. I’m definitely adjusting but they feel so good that I’m willing to keep adjusting. I think it works. It’s a little rich from my blood. But you can pull it off. I had another update for you. You forgot it? Oh no, I had a, See, I’m touching my face now that I put my hand in your foot, totally fine. It’s like touching me and then touching a cow, right. It’s like touching a cow. Yeah, it’s like touching a cow and then touching my face. I blew your mind recently about the interstates, so I have a little bit less of a, Gotta be real, I mean, yeah, I learned something, but it was a bit dry. I have a little bit, It’s kinda like when I see a Jared Leto photo. This is less dry. In fact, this is as wet, Dry, but in a non thirsty way. This is as wet as I can get right now. Okay. The Amazon is the longest river in the world? It’s not the Nile, right? I think the Amazon is the longest river in the world. If it isn’t the, it is one of the longest rivers in the world. Do you know how many bridges the Amazon has over it? And it goes like 3,400 miles or something. Seven, not many. Why you looking at me like that, ’cause I’m right? Guess again. Six, uh huh. Zero. Zero? There are no bridges over the entire Amazon River. Not one. And it is the longest? The longest is the Nile. You fool! Amazon coming up with a close second. Okay, all right. Yeah, that’s why I said one of. it doesn’t have, How many bridges over the Ohio? Any bridges. No bridges over the Amazon. Now it might have like, somebody might have, How on Earth do you get to the other side? Somebody might have put a bridge on some part that, and I’m talking about bridges that cars could go over. I’m talking about roads that go over. I don’t know, maybe somebody like, We’re not talking about a footbridge or a rope bridge. Yeah, like a cable bridge or something, a rope bridge or something, like you can’t stop somebody from doing that. But you can’t drive your car across the Amazon at any point. This is mind blowing to me. Well, I guessed seven. And the reason is, since you asked, Why on Earth would there not be, because there’s no highways. It’s too jungly. Trying to keep the loggers out? There’s a couple of reasons. One of the reasons is it’s too jungly. No kind of, you’re kind of right. There aren’t many roads that need to cross the Amazon. So the Amazon is the Amazon jungle, right, and so it is this impenetrable, in fact, the Amazon itself is the road that people use to get through the Amazon. The river is the road. So it’s more about the river being the mode of transportation than any one side trying to get to the other side. But the other reason is an engineering reason as a Loamy soil. Semi-professional civil engineer, this meant a lot to me. And that is the fact that, the river is a couple, a few miles wide most of the time. But then during the rainy season, the wet season, as Jared Leto would say, in January, the river balloons to 30, like many, many, many miles wide. And the banks change and stuff. Very swampy. The banks erode and change and so it would be an absolute engineering nightmare. It would take a lot to justify building a bridge because it would be one of those bridges that was mostly bridge over land and really high and very, very expensive for a really, really long period of time. And there’s not really a demand for it. So why do it? That fascinated me. Not as much as the way the interstates in America work, but it was a close second. I like the Amazon thing better. It was shorter. It was the second longest interesting explanation that I’ve given about something recently. Do you have a recommendation? I do. This is something I discovered at a buffet recently, a breakfast buffet that I’m recommending. We talking hotel? I’m talking airport. Continental? Ooh, danger. Airport lounge buffet With your loafers, of course This is pre loafers. I would’ve had ’em on and I will have them on from here on out. Yeah, you will. Because I think if you’ve got loafers on, I don’t think you have to show a card. You get preferential treatment in the lounge. There’s a line just for people with loafers. They get in, they get in fast, they’re given the best of everything. You skip the line, loafer line. I wanted oatmeal for the function of oatmeal, fiber, Fiber. I wanted to get oatmeal. I wanted to eat yogurt ’cause I like it. Oh, not for the probiotics? And for the probiotics. I got a bowl of oatmeal, I got a small bowl of yogurt. I took them back to back to the loafer part of the lounge. Okay, this better be good. And then I was like, We’re on the edge of our seats. Why haven’t I mixed these before? I’ve never mixed it, well, because one’s hot and one’s cold. So what? Well that’s, I gave you the reason, I mean, this is coming from a butch twink. You can mix hot and cold all you want. Yeah, I’m all over the place. It is exquisite, okay. What’s the ratio? It does create, I would say three parts oatmeal, one part yogurt. You’re treating the yogurt like a cream addition. It does make a lukewarm light brown mush. You know how much I like mush. Which I think is right down your alley. Mush is my favorite type of food. It made a creamy, tangy oatmeal. I did it and then I’m trying to get my wife’s attention. I’m like, Jessie, look what I just did. And she’s like, well, I’m like, I put, You’re doing to her what you’re doing to us. I put yogurt in my oatmeal, have you ever done that? And she was like, no. I was like, well, neither have I, but I just did. Yeah, you did. And it just feels like this should be a thing. So anyway, that’s my recommendation. If you’ve got both, Yoatmeal. Make some yoatmeal. Hey, I named it, so. We might need to sell it. Rhett and Link’s yoatmeal. Oh yeah. We’re gonna have to get a photo shoot. We might need to sell it. We sell, it could be in that, you know that yogurt that comes and it’s got the fruit that’s, is that Chobani, it’s got the fruit that you then pop over. So what we need is we need a little side saddle that’s full of oatmeal that’s three times as much oatmeal as the yogurt that you bought. Or maybe it’s the other way around. Maybe it’s a big thing of oatmeal, and then there’s a yo-, but the hot and cold though. So it comes like that, but then you, it’s perforated, you rip it apart, you put the oatmeal in the microwave. And you make it scalding. And then it’s like it prevents you from burning your mouth. That’s the worst thing that can happen to a privileged person. Hmm. Burning your mouth on something that you don’t have the patience to wait to eat. Well, yogurt takes care of it. And it’s a really healthy meal. There’s nothing worse that can happen to a loafered person than burning your mouth. I hadn’t thought of that. And we fixed that with Rhett and Link’s Yoatmeal. Yoatmeal. I don’t know what I’m missing, and why, maybe this is a thing, maybe the people out there who’ve been wearing loafers and just not sweating in them because of the magic of loafers have also been eating yoatmeal all this time and we didn’t know. and the yolk meal, I kind and the yoatmeal, I kind of feel like I’m turning over a new leaf. I mean, just go to yoatmeal.com. Does it exist? We’re gonna have to buy it before this goes out. It’s just oatmeal with a Y in front of it. It does not, does not exist as a site. Hell yeah. You guys are set. Well, I mean now we have to buy it, every time we mention a URL on this program that we do. Well Get over it. Well, Well, Get over it. They’ll probably get here. There is also a brand of overnight oats called Mush. Mush, I call it moosh, but it’s probably mush. Is there yogurt in it? Not yet, we could partner with them. Do people do this, though? Overnight oats are cold and mushy and you can get it in chocolate, you can get it in vanilla, not a sponsor, but I’m throwing another rec on here. Whenever I go my glamping, I like to bring a little Mush. The first thing, yogurt in o-, it auto completed to yogurt in oatmeal Reddit. Adding some fat-free Greek yogurt to your oatmeal makes it, oh gosh, people already know about this. So much more creamy and more filling. Yeah, y’all know. And more probiotic. Of course. Okay, holy cow guys, yogurt and oats. I mean, 2016. But nobody got yoatmeal.com. Not the prettiest oats, LOL, but yogurt on oats is life-changing. It is, it is. Let me see the picture. Well, I’ll just click on it. This is my, this is right up my alley. See, oh, this person did fruit. I don’t even think you would like this. Well I love it and I didn’t even put fruit in it. Yeah, it’s ugly, that’s the problem. Who cares, you like pudding. Oh, I love it. Pudding is one of the ugliest foods. Pudding is great. This is new pudding. Pudding looks like something that would come outta your body. Anything that looks like it could have come from a person, a living person in real time, as a food is not particularly appetizing visually. Oatgurt.com, what about that? And I do feel liKe yogurt and oatmeal do look like something that might come outta somebody if you sliced ’em open. Oatgurt is not as enticing of a name, is it, as yoatmeal. Oatgurt, it’s more original. Oh, it’s hard to say, oatgurt. And it sounds like you’re regurgitating. The domain is available for sale on GoDaddy. Oatgurt, we don’t want that one. Yoatmeal. We’re not gonna buy that one. Yoatmeal, yoatmeal. You can have oatgurt and you can be our competition. And you know what, screw you, you’re going down. That’s right. You suck. Yoatmeal, man, it’s the future freaking, dude, man, yes. Anyway, that’s my rec. You can try it on your own but we will at some point be coming out with a product that is just oatmeal and yogurt together. Yeah, and you should see the photo shoot that’s gonna go along with it. Oh man, all right, use hashtag EarBiscuits, let us know what you think about this conversation. And please leave us a voicemail ’cause we’re we’re listening to ’em. 1-888-EarPod1, EarPod1. Talk at you next week. Hi Rhett and Link, my name is Kai, I am from Canada and I’m listening to your I was today years old confessions Ear Biscuits episode. And I also double space after a period. It’s a habit I can’t break. I learned it in school in the ’90s and I just can’t not do it. It’s ingrained into me. So you’re not alone there, Link, bye. 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