earlier today an asteroid nearly destroyed all life on Earth let’s talk about that good morning Chia Lincoln and good morning Chia Lincoln viewers it is February 1 1 2001 1 Oh what is that right Friday yeah it is confused just a lot of ones it’s not that confusing ok it’s Friday and you know what that means sometimes looking at always though it means it’s science Friday you can’t call it science writing because that’s already a show at least a podcast on NPR I know I know that ok we will call science Saturday that doesn’t make any sense either how about we call it good morning Chia Lincoln science edition that happens to occasionally occur on Fridays ok yeah ok but what and before we get into it let me say that as a result of good morning tea Lincoln I learned a lot anyway it just a resulted yesterday’s show there was a lot you needed to know well today I learned from a couple of days ago that if I pull my battery thing off it would reset my engine light which I did this morning thank you viewers for commenting I also learned yesterday what the term levity actually means because I didn’t use it correctly can you tell him I I will admit I did know what live evening but I I didn’t exactly I wasn’t listening I was chanting of the next thing I was going to say ok that’s it I apologize to all the viewers out there for not correcting me yeah but you know it gave them an opportunity to correct you also learned that a barn owl and a barred owl are two different types of legitimate I learned that definitely that was new to me so so you know maybe you can learn something today well I was exaggerating what I said that an asteroid nearly missed the earth and almost killed all life on Earth but I was not exaggerating by saying that an asteroid almost hit the earth I mean it came within like three thousand miles of the earth earlier today but it was a really like feel the breeze of it or something I’ll have a telescope and I’m constantly scanning the earth that’s why I don’t sleep it didn’t you know this about me I have like a 350 dollar telescope and I’m constantly scanning the earth I have a feed that comes in to my computer and I’m Mela and I am like oh crap there’s an asteroid better call NASA why didn’t you call me if you knew this was happening well alert me and my family I figured that it would miss us and I was right actually I got this from the news I don’t have a telescope I got it from the news and the news said that there was a very pretty small just a few meters across asteroid that came within a few thousand miles of the earth and it was pulled in by our gravitational forces that the earth exerts on things and then it kind of slingshotted it around okay but it was a couple of meters wide if that would have hit the earth what would have happened it most likely would have you know been torn up by the friction or dissolved in the friction of the atmosphere and maybe a few pieces known as meteorites when they come into the atmosphere and hit the earth would have made it maybe like hit somebody in the head a really unfortunate person maybe killed like one person well actually a pet or something it’s a meteor when it’s coming into the atmosphere yes and then once it if it goes and it lands and you can pick it up that’s a meteorite and you can make like jewelry out of it and you should and you should sell it for vast quantities of money or you can do it what my uncle does and you could just get rocks out of your backyard and say that it’s meteorites and sell them on the streets of New York come on a meteorite I got one in my go into my trench coat right here I got lots of meteorites right here baby this one’s still on fire it’s a it’s a meteor it’s not even a right jet but it’s sorry it looks a lot like a like a pond a river stone no this is this is straight from space it’s you know it’s meteorite okay I’ll give you three dollars for it smell it you can smell the meteorite ness of it okay um now break the bad news but here’s the bad news earlier this week if you if you have a large telescope where you have the news you may have seen that Russian scientists have predicted that in the year 2036 that’s not too long away you know will also be alive unless you know we have a disease or something don’t know why I said that well we all die right I mean it’s just a lot of people who are watching this will still be alive in 2036 apparently there is a massive asteroid two football fields across now when we get up into that size we’re talking catastrophic damage of this thing makes it to earth because it will penetrate the atmosphere sorry I’m getting better people day by day I am getting better and it will break the atmosphere and then it will be like nuclear bombs just going off and it’ll cause a nuclear winter it’s going to kill a lot of people this is bad news 2036 very large asteroid on a collision course with earth now the Russian scientists are like this is a very horrible thing that will happen I don’t know how to do a Russian accent so that’s what that was it but the the US scientists the NASA people are saying well they disagree and they’re challenged and technically wrestling there’s like a 1 and 250 100,000 chance that this will actually happen so technically the Russians are correct but it are alarmist but it’s very unlikely but we’re talking at 1 in 250,000 chance that this asteroid is going to make it come into contact with the earth now and I think that you know you’re 20 34 so we’re going to have better prediction better predictive powers and we’re going to know and let’s just say that we determined that this thing is on a collision course with earth just like the movies deep impact and Armageddon you know we’d been through this before yeah that’s what I was going to say I’m not worried about this two entire movies have already been made and they were almost made in the same year I think a you know with viable solutions to going out to this thing and blowing it up but in Armageddon Bruce Willis saved the day but in deep impact they blew it apart with nuclear bombs and one of the big pieces still may contract with the earth and whichever one had robert duvall in it is the one that I’m going with and hopefully that’s not the one that had Ben Affleck in it I don’t know well that’s the one that it made catastrophic impact well that’s the one I’m going with which everyone has Robert Duvall but Michael I’m going well here’s the deal I’ve got I’ve got a theory I’ve got a solution and it’s not blowing up the meteorite those are not the same a theory and a solution or not this is whatever it is we don’t need to do anything to the object coming at us all we need to do is something here on earth something very simple and I’ll be in charge of the committee to do this wrap the earth in Snuggies like mass-produced snugly soda or just bounce off the earth no that’s not my idea I am proposing a system called EPS the earth positioning system for very large thrusters one at the North Pole one of the South Pole one in China and one in the US actually you know what let’s put the other one like the it the equator both of the other ones who should be at the equator one of them should be like Panama and the other one should be like the other side of the world you get my idea for very large thrusters I’ll oversee one of them I’ll oversee the one of the equator I don’t want to spend any time at the poles I’ll ever see the one at the other side of the equator very very hockey everyday large thrusters and these thrusters are strategically placed so that it as the Earth rotates during the day as it’s coming at us like all right fire up thruster three instantly and the earth moves a little bit I’m pretty I’m pretty sure that would throw off like rotation orbit pretty much everything I don’t think that’s a good idea it would save us though yeah you know it’s a band-aid solution I think we should really entertain the whole Snuggie thing no but think about it after we dodged the asteroid because this will work people then like every 4th of July or like every time any country celebrates their independence we fire all four thrusters at the same time and nothing nothing happens like a celebration it’s just like all right everybody it’s the 4th of July they’re gonna fire all four thrusters it might smash the other and you like you get you get you can be like anywhere on the earth and see these things cuz they’re so big it’s just like this huge column of fire and we just and everybody celebrates and all four of them go and the earth takes a little bit but it doesn’t move at all it sounds horrible and then it’s over and then we celebrate with these thrusters after we use them to dodge asteroids and then if future asteroids come we strategically use them and we get out of the way leave a comment tell me where I’m wrong people with your idea which I’m sure will be better than that his but maybe not better than mine let’s check in with Cheney Lincoln he’s getting brown he’s got a lot going on right here though all right while we’re all still still here on this earth and we can enjoy ourselves and make meaningful lives for ourselves let’s do that and I hope that good morning Sheila he continues to be a part of a meaningful life for you see you Monday night right ooh give it a poignant ending I like that