Nothing that we’re gonna eat today is food. – Let’s talk about that. (fun theme music) (fire blazes) Good Mythical Morning. – You probably seen the television show My Strange Addiction – Nope. – Which profiles people who have strange addictions. – Yeah. – Many of which are the fact that they eat things that you have no business eating, they are not food. – Right and this predilection to eat things that are not food is associated with the disorder called pica. Which could mean that there’s some sort of vitamin or mineral deficiency and that makes these people wanna eat things or it might just be that they really like them. I mean, maybe we’re missin’ out. – Maybe we need to have more open minds. – They know something that we don’t. Let’s find out. It’s time for My Prediction Is We’ll Have A Lot Of Confliction With These Strange Addictions But Maybe Not. – Okay, each of the things that we are going to sample today is because there is a person, at least one person on earth, who is addicted to eating the thing that we are about to also eat. – Right and enjoy. – And well, maybe enjoy. – Try to enjoy. – But the point is we are gonna assess, “Huh, I’m surprised, “I get it”, or, “I regret it.” Okay? – Okay. Starting with Kesha from Joliet, Illinois who loves to snack constantly throughout the day and estimates that she’s consumed roughly 900 rolls of toilet paper, Link. – We got a little Orville and Wilbur TP. – Shout out to the Wright Brothers. (laughs) Okay, so. – They are right because it’s rolling over, not under. – This is the correct way to do it. We’ve got some parsley. – [Link] Some garnish there. – We just set that aside, that’s not what this is about. And according the Kesha she said… – 900 rolls? – She says, “I like how it feels when it goes on my tongue. “You break it off – Okay. – “And lay it on your tongue.” So, Link… – Now, again, we’re not judging yet, we’re just trying… – I’m doin’ it for you. (laughs) (choking) (laughs) You’re gonna choke me. You we’re like uh uh uh, and put it back in there like that, man. – It’s like a magician stuffing a handkerchief in his hand. (laughs) That’s what that was. That’s a magician. – The international sign. – Okay. – For magicians. – Alright so this is dry. – I’m startin’ with smaller amounts, man. – Well the part that you put on my tongue is starting to dissolve. – I don’t like it. It’s too dry. – I can pull this out. – It’s too dry. – Mm. – Now what if this eliminates the need for wiping your butt? – Yeah, it’s like from the inside out? – Yeah, right. It just (swishing). – That’s a good thought. Did Kesha way in on that? – She didn’t Kesha didn’t say that. Kesha’s a busy lady. Puttin’ out the hits. – Well I think she does it a lot in a movie theater. She says a good place where people really don’t pay attention to you eating toilet paper is the movie theater. – (laughs) Yeah. – ‘Cause they’re looking at the movie. But if I look next to me and there was a woman eating toilet paper, I guess I wouldn’t mind. It’s like, hey! Whatever, girl. – This part right here, though. I’m just kinda chewing on it like gum but not thinking about swallowing it. It’s like bland gum. You’re the guy who likes bland stuff. I would think this is right down your alley. – I didn’t dislike it. – Now, medically speaking, eating a small amount of toilet paper is safe, however, most toilet paper is made with chlorine or chlorine dioxide as a bleach. So, that is a carcinogen. You do not want to get a lot of that so we’re worried about you Kesha. But, just for the little bit that we’ve had it’s relatively safe. I can’t swallow it though. I feel like I swallowed like a pill. – [Link] Yeah. (grunts) – I’m not gonna wipe for the next 48 hours. (grunts) – I just faked swallowing it. I still got it here. – I’m gonna say I get this one. I get it. (bell rings) – I don’t get it, man. (buzzes) I regret it. Next up we have Jennifer from Saint Louis who eats about a square foot everyday, and has consumed roughly eight whole mattresses. – That’s from a dollhouse. – Right, so instead of eating this little dollhouse mattress, even though it is garnished with, oh, a little bit of red wine and some parsley. We’ve locally sourced – Oh, gosh. – A fresh new mattress. Bring it in! Mm. Okay, it’s not too fresh. This is Lizzie’s mattress. (laughs) – What? – I just can’t help but notice there is a crater in the center of it. – Are we giving this back to you after we sample it? – [Lizzie] Oh, please, no. – How did you create that crater? Or do I not wanna know? – [Lizzie] I don’t wanna talk about it. (laughs) – She doesn’t wanna talk about it. Well I don’t wanna eat it. (crew laughs) But I’m gonna try. Okay, bring it on up here, boys. – This particularly – Look at that. – Doesn’t seem safe, man. – No, it doesn’t. – This is safe? – Well a little bit of any non-edible thing as long as it’s not poison. For the most part. – Hold on. – As long as it doesn’t clog you up. I mean it could. – Really? That’s a fact? – It could constipate you. Or if it blocks you somewhere down there you’re in trouble. – ‘Cause if it was poison and you were sleeping on it every night that would be bad. – Right. Oh, goodness. I just pulled. Like I’m gonna eat… It’s not cotton candy. I’m not eating this whole thing. There’s some blue here, that might be blueberry flavored. – Just give me a little of the, oh gosh. I’m gonna go deep. – I mean, she eats a square foot every day. A square foot. This is nowhere near a square foot. – Oh, gosh. – She just nibbles on it I guess, like as she’s going to bed or something. – Lizzie, I don’t feel right about this. Just so you know. (laughs) – Yeah, you shouldn’t. – Eating your mattress. – How long have you been sleeping on this mattress? – [Lizzie] Solid year. – Oh, okay. – Solid year? – Could be a lot worse. – It’s in your mouth, huh? Okay. I’ll add it. – [Rhett] Uh! – Jennifer said, “I like my mattress plain and straight up. “No mayonnaise, no butter, none of that.” – Man, do we have mayonnaise? Just like she’s talkin’ crap about the people who do eat their mattresses with mayonnaise and butter. “I’m a purist!” – I think it be a texture thing ’cause it’s very springy. – Springy! – Yeah. – I do like the springy, it feels like I get a workout. Again, – Boingy, boingy, boingy. – Puttin’ it in my mouth now, chipmunkin’ a little bit, gummin’ it a little bit. – Yeah. – I get that part. But the part where you then consume it and it goes inside of you. – I tastes like fabric softener. Like there’s some sort of a… You been sprayin’ stuff on it? – You take a shower before or after you sleep? (laughs) – [Lizzie] Usually before, actually. – Oh, good. I can taste it. (laughs) – Alright, I just swallowed a little bit of that. – How? – And it’s like, I can feel it crawling down my esophagus. – Again, I gotta go to the water. – I think it really comes down… If I’m really gonna try to – Oh! – Put myself in Jennifer’s shoes I mean, I’m gonna give you the benefit of the doubt and say that it just comes down to texture. – It got hung up a little bit. I don’t get this one. – That is not good enough for me. – [Rhett] 100% regret it. – [Link] Regret it. (buzzes) – Since she was 13 Andrea from Marietta, Georgia has eaten roughly six thousand feet, per month, of adhesive tape. – Are you kidding me? (laughs) How do you eat 6,000 feet a month? – Well you get started. You get started. Right now. – Oh my goodness. – You get your own roll. Oh. – Alright. It’s adhered. – It’s adhered. It’s taped. – [Link] Okay. – [Rhett] Okay. – [Link] Okay. – I’m just gonna get a couple of inches here. – You smellin’ it first? Oh. You’re working it in. I’m actually gonna tape it to my tongue and see if it adheres. – And? – First of all, the adhesive is already gone, I’ve already. – Yeah, adhesive goes like that. And the adhesive has a nice flavor. – Tastes good. It’s got a good flavor. (crew laughs) – Mild to bat, I feel like I get this one. And according to Andrea, she’s 13 remember, she said, “It’s not bad. “Well I don’t know if it’s bad for you.” (laughs) That’s what she was quoted as saying. But according to the material of safety data sheet that came along with the tap, no health effects are expected from ingestion. So, hey. May not be good for you, ain’t gonna hurt you. – Well, it’s hurting my feelings. – Really? – Yeah. It doesn’t feel like I’m doing the right thing. – Every time I get to this part. – Right, it starts to just turn into… – But I feel like I can go bigger. The first part, the adhesive is not bad. Just take it. – Yeah, I think if, maybe she spits it out. (mouths smacking) Maybe she gets the adhesive taste and then spits out this part. I don’t think so but. – We could do a Lady and the Tramp thing. Maybe we shouldn’t. – We shouldn’t. I just don’t desire it. – I got a lot of adhesive that time. – Yeah. – Think I went a little, oh… A little, oh… – Yeah, it’s starts to not be great. – I’m not swallowing this one. It’s got sharp edges on it. – Yeah, it seems prickly and I don’t get it. I can’t figure it out. – 6,000 feet per month. That’s like 200 feet a day. – [Link] Gracious. – That’s like going through this whole thing a couple of times. Sorry, Andrea. I don’t get it. – I regret it. (buzzes) Danielle from San Antonio, Texas has spent over $350 a month for over 20 years – Oh. – To satisfy her addiction to smelling and eating vapor rub. – Oh. – Vapor rub. That’s quite a budget for some, man. I mean, nowhere on the instructions is it gonna say to eat this stuff. – I mean, how many things of vapor rub does it take to get to $350? It’s not that pricey. – Oh, man. I guess if you’re constantly eating this stuff. Now, I anticipate smelling it something that we could get. And I do. You know, when I’m sick I rub this stuff on my chest. When I was a kid my step mom told me to rub it on my feet when I was sick. – Well she was wrong. – But I did try it. And it didn’t hurt. But I didn’t rub it into my mouth. And neither did she. – But it smells so non-edible though at the same time. It smells like something that you might should be exposed to but not somethin’ that you should ingest. – Danielle says, “It’s like when someone squirts lemon in “your eye but it’s a good burn.” I’ve never wanted lemon squirted in my eye either. – Let’s do this, man. Let’s not delay. – I’m just gonna, I mean, just a little bit, maybe. – That’s not a little bit, man. – She drinks tea by coating the tea bag in vapor rub. – Well that’s less direct that what you’re about to do. – [Link] I’m just gonna taste a… – I’m going a lot smaller than that. I just got a… Oh gosh! – Now, a medical note here. (yells) – Consuming vapor rub can lead to camphor poisoning. (yells) Which produces symptoms such as abdominal pain, convulsions, excessive thirst, excitation, and muscle spasms. – Excitation? – According to Medline Plus. Nausea, vomiting, rapid pulse, restlessness, and burning in the mouth. Of course burning in the mouth or throat. There’s a refreshing… I mean, brush your teeth to get a refreshing mouth. – It is very minty. – Yeah I mean, your mouth smells like a old folks’ home. – I could see this a like a pre-date kinda thing. Like I mean, you just stick it in there and – There’s better things for that. – You’ve got good breath for the rest of the night but you talk like this. I feel the need to… – I mean, after hearing all the things that are gonna happen to us, except for excitation, I don’t want it. – I don’t wanna be that excited. – Gotta get it off the roof of my mouth. – You went too hard, man. You went in. – Mm. – Too aggressively. I’m worried about you, Danielle. This is not good. – There was a refreshing moment. – She’s 20 years in. – I mean, I’m gonna give it to her. There’s a refreshing moment but it’s tempered by the facts. Which are this is bad for you. – [Rhett] I don’t get it. I regret it. – I regret it. (buzzes) – Patrice from London has spent everyday of the last 12 years consuming half a glass of the finest pulverized brick. – [Link] Seriously? – Yes. This is a brick, Link. Now you can’t just bite a brick like and apple. – Oh I’d love to just bite that like an apple. I’m glad you told me not to. – [Rhett] That’s why I brought… – A hammer? This is what she does? She like chips away at her wall? Oh my goodness. – Grab a piece. (laughs) Here. – Thank you, Rhett. And now, I have heard of people eating clay. – Right. And that’s exactly why this is safe because all it is is red clay and it’s materials from the earth sort of hardened and baked. And so it’s not poison. – No real smell to it. (grunts) You look like a angry old sailor. (grunts) I’ve been on the seas, sir. – It’s like when you get like a weird part of an oyster. You know like, the thing that the pearl was gonna form around? It’s got a good smell to it, doesn’t it? I kinda like it. I’m gonna just lick the part right here. (crunching) Let me lick up some of the shavings. – I mean, it has a Pop Rocks sensation when you chew on it. – Do that, man. Stick your tongue on that. – Stick your tongue on what? – Not where I stuck my tongue but right there. Just get some of the pulver. (snickers) (crunching) That’s the good stuff. It’s like salt and pepper. – You hear that? (crunching) – [Crew] Ugh. And are her teeth okay? Does she still have them? – Well she says her teeth are totally fine. Although, that is a side effect from eating things that are like rocks. – Is it though? – I kinda like it. – Ooo. – I kinda like the grittiness. I like things that are gritty. I like gritty movies, you know? – (chuckles) Yeah. – I like gritty situations. This is like puts me right in the middle of a gritty situation. – I’m very sensitive to my teeth and my teeth are also sensitive. And I’d like to keep them. I feel like when my teeth grind away ’cause I chew so much I’m gonna die like an elephant. – It’s like polishing them. Don’t you feel like it’s like polishing? It’s gonna make your teeth extra clean. – Everything about this experience is saying this is wrong. – I don’t know how she’s gotten through 2100 standard bricks in her lifetime. I think it might take me a lifetime to get through this one. But I like the pulverized powdery part of this. I like that experience and I might stick with this. I get it. (rings) – I do not get it because every time I crunch down on it it reverberates all the way through my skull and it seems like damage is being done. I regret it. – Okay. Well, let us know if you enjoy eating the things that we’ve eaten today or other strange things that we didn’t get to. – Like this show, I think hopefully that’s your strange addiction. And thank you for liking, commenting and subscribing. – You know what time it is. – Hi, I’m Mindy Wise. – Hi, I’m Elijah Wise. And this is Philip. – And it’s time to spin – Time to spin the Wheel of Mythicality. – The Wheel of Mythicality. – We’re hoping you’ll become strangely addicted to our new YouTube channel This Is Mythical. Go over there and subscribe. We’ve got videos coming next week. In the meantime you can enjoy some trailers. – And click through to Good Mythical More, we’re gonna open your mail and test out some strange addictions submitted by you. – Let’s get textual. This is when you text something to someone that we ask you to text and then screenshot their reaction. Why don’t you text someone, “It’s time.” And then screenshot their response. Post it with hashtag lets get textual. – It’s time. It’s time. – [Link] Click on the left to watch our show after the show, Good Mythical More. – [Rhett] Click on the right to watch another episode of Good Mythical Morning. – [Link] And click the circular channel icon to subscribe. – [Rhett] Thanks for being your mythical best.