Ah. (upbeat electronic music) – Throughout history there have been different kinds of unreasonable beauty standards and as such there have been different kinds of unreasonable exercise equipment. – Mm-hm, and we’re gonna try out one unique vintage exercise product and decide if it’s worth it or if we should set it on fire. – Okay. – It’s time for Return It or Burn It. – Okay, admittedly, that title’s a little misleading because if you have a product that you return, that means you didn’t like it, but in our case, – Yeah. – We’re saying that, when you don’t like it, you burn it, but when you do like it, you return it, meaning not that you’re gonna return it back to the store, but you’re like returning it- – Turn it to the sounds. – To circulation. – To circulation. – So everyone can enjoy it. – Yeah. Pretty simple. – Very clear. – Straightforward. – Yep. – To the test zone. – This is the Vitamaster Belt Massager. – Oh. – This one in particular was made in 1978, but you’ve seen these in movies and TV. Originally they came out in the 20s and they were marketed as a more feminine way to work out along with other passive exercise machines. – Okay, so this so-called passive exercise machine was meant to help with fat loss and body shaping, but the science behind it is pretty dubious. – Yeah. – Here’s some footage from the thing in action in 1945. – [Narrator] But a girl with any real spirit will throw herself wholeheartedly into the battle of the bulges and for her there are gymnasiums. Our gyms are different, if you don’t mind a mauling, you don’t have to work. – Wow, ladies, are you tempted? Your gyms are different. Well, let’s find out if this thing works. So, in order for this to be, you know, we gotta really test, return it or burn it. – Yeah. – And we gonna burn it if we don’t wanna return it. So, I think the only scientific way to do this is to weigh ourselves with an equally old piece of machinery, and then see if we lose any weight in the process. – Little bit more. (light music) Alright, how much is that? – That is 212 and a half. 168, almost 168. – Almost 168. It’s currently set on light massage. – Crank it up. – Whoa. – Whoa. Oh-oh-oh. It feels incredible. I’ve never had my booty massaged with such intensity. There is no masseuse that can work it like this. Oh, now it’s making it itch, now it’s making my booty itch. – Your booty’s itching? – But it’s kind of a good itch. (upbeat electronic music) – Here. – Oh my goodness. – Move it up your back. Medium massage. – Oh-oh, oh-oh. Ah. – [Link] Now your booty’s still shaking. – Ah-oh. This one doesn’t make me itch as much, but it’s got a nice, relaxing effect. Hey brother. – Hey, keep it appropriate. – Wooph. I’m really having the time of my life, can you leave? Okay, you wanna try it? – Yeah, man, deep massage. Oh. Oh. Oh. It kind of makes me feel like I need to poop. Kind of like to touch it when it’s shaking like that. (laughs) Yeah. I’m the king of the world. Oh, man, that’s really getting my bladder. Oh, yeah. – Think I could do just the neck? – Good idea. – Oh, oh gosh. – It’s like whiplash, man. – Oh, it feels so good. What does my face look like? – [Link] Relaxed. – You should put it on your forehead. – Oh. Yeah. (crew laughing) That feels good. – [Rhett] Do you think it could shake your glasses off? – Uh. – [Rhett] Tell me that don’t feel good. – Ah. – You look like you’re in pure ecstasy. – That feels good, yeah, man. – Go two booty wides. – Ready? – Hit it! (fast electronic music) – Just two buddies vibrating together. – Ah! – I think maybe– – Oh, burnin’! Oh, you just broke it. Okay, let’s get our results by weighing. – Hold on, so if you get on this thing and you weigh less, meaning that it would be pushing up– – Yeah, we return it. – Then– – Meaning we keep it. – We keep it. You weigh exactly the same, man. There’s still hope with me, though. I weigh exactly the same thing. – But you know what, we had a lotta fun. And we get to burn something! – Yeah. – Well, Vitamaster, it was good while it lasted. Light it. (torch whooshes) – Ho, yeah you not gonna be shakin’ booties any longer! – [Rhett] Burn Vitamaster! – Well, click through to watch us play a game with the worst celebrity wax figures ever. (extinguisher sprays) Oh, it’s just like new. Don’t trust yourself around an online store? Don’t worry, you can make free returns when you buy our GMM logo t-shirts from our Amazon store.