Which salsa should you dip your chip in? – Let’s talk about that. (groovy electronic music) – Good Mythical Morning. – Joining us today is the Eva in My life As Eva, YouTuber extraordinaire Eva Gutowski. Welcome to the show! – Hello! You have to clear something out of your throat? (Rhett grunting) – He’s like– – Welcome to the show, Eva. – You need to clear your throat too? – No I’m good, I still have my– ♪ Let me clear my throat ah-na-ah-na-ah-na ugh ♪ – I still have my youth in me. – Oh you think it’s ’cause I’m an old man. – Oh that’s what it is. (laughs) She got you. – I gotta clear my throat. Okay. – Eva saw me this morning– – Let’s change the subject from my voice– – She was like what happened to your hair? – I swear last time I saw you, your hair was not gray at all. – Yeah. – Yeah, well it’s been awhile. – He aged like a president. – Yeah. (Link grunting forcefully) – YouTube’s really got ya stressed. (Link grunts) – Oh, you wanna get into that? – Okay how do you feel about salsa? – You know, salsa and I have a love-hate relationship. If it’s spicy, I love it but if it’s like mole salsa– – Oh. – Okay. – I can’t do mole, I’m sorry. – Okay well no mole here. – But I do like salsa. – All right so you’re opinionated, I think that’s good for what we’re gonna do. Of course Cinco de Mayo’s comin’ up so that means if you didn’t pay your rent you’re four days late. – Yeah. – But it also means– – Uh-oh. – In that love-hate relationship you gotta skew towards love because lots of salsa is gonna be consumed. – Yeah, yeah. – So we are gonna determine the best salsa that you can get off the shelves right now. It’s time for we’re prepared-ay to taste this verde. We want to know-ha what’s the best roja? Hey former California Lieutenant Governor Cruz Bustamante, we’re about to name the best picante. (chuckling) That’s about as political as we get around here. – Okay here’s what we’re gonna do, we’re gonna be tasting salsas blindly, we’re not gonna know what they are but the brands we’ll be tasting in no particular order are: Frontera, Tostito’s, Newman’s Own, La Victoria, Pace, and Whole Foods 365. – You sure that’s not Pachay? – Well you wanna call it Pachay? – No, Passay, Passay? – Pace. – Pace. – Like paso doble. – I don’t know, I don’t know. We’re gonna rank them each on a scale of one to 10. That’s the only thing I do know. We’re gonna combine our scores and then in the end, we will crown the best salsa and that salsa will win a kiss from each of us. – Oh that’s weird. – I don’t know about his throat clearing. Maybe he goes last. – I’m not sick! – Kisses last. – I’m just like– – Okay, and for the purpose of consistency, we’re gonna be using all chunky mild variations. No mole. – And no spicy. – That is what is the best-selling flavor on Amazon. All right let’s salsa. – [Rhett and Link] Round one. – All right we’ve got what we don’t know brand here and I don’t know what chips these are either but they will be consistent. And again even though you may like spicy, the mild is the best-selling and we can focus on the taste and then infer that spice would only help. – Hmm. – Hmm. – It’s a pretty thin salsa. – Yeah, yeah. – I mean, they may say it’s chunky but– – [Link] Sure let’s double dip. – [Rhett] I found a chunk. – This is giving me like college frat party vibes. – Is that a good thing? – I mean not frat, like frat barbecue. – Frat barbecue, a little inebriated perhaps. But not too much. – No. – It does feel a little cheap, doesn’t it? – Yeah it feels like a college student picked that up to be nice. – Which is I guess why I love it. – And now they can’t afford their textbooks. – I do, I like it, I like it. – I like it. – Ain’t nothing wrong with it but– – It wasn’t bad. – Nothing’s really, it’s not making a statement. – It’s super simple, it’s a little thin for me. There’s nothing horrible about it. I’m gonna give it a six on a scale of one to 10. – I as well, six. – Oh! – I would give it a four. – Ooh. – Okay, a little salsa critic. – I’ll give it a five, I’ll give it a five. – No hey hey– – No give it a four. Stick with a four. – Go with your instinct. – I mean it’s not bad, it’s not learning towards bad, it’s just really not special. – But you wanted to say four. Don’t let us influence you. – Four. – There we go. – All right four. – [Rhett] And that’s a total of 16. – [Rhett and Link] Round two. – Look at this one, it’s got some chunk to it. – This one’s looking better. – Yeah, definitely chunkier. – [Rhett] Oh that looks nice and thick. Doesn’t drip back into the– – Oh look at that, it holds on the chip nice. – Your chip’s not holding together very well though. – Oh, very salty, oh. – I would say tangier than the previous. – It’s pungent. – Yeah. – Oh I like that. – So where the other one lacked a punch, this one’s making up the difference. Givin’ you more to experience which brings my score up. But the taste is kinda the same. It’s like a punchier version of the previous, I don’t know. – It’s like they just added tons of salt to the old one. – It’s still salsa. – I don’t know. I have no clue what it is, it doesn’t taste like Newman. – This is La Victoria. – What does Newman taste like? – Newman’s tastes like– – I’ll know it when I taste it. – But Newman’s like, it’s got that this is all going to charity vibe. – Oh really? – (chuckles) You know what I’m saying? – Newman’s gives me like white people buying salsa and they are scared that it’s gonna have a little too much kick to it. – (chuckles) You right. (Link chuckles) You right. – This one’s La Victoria. – I’m gonna give it a seven ’cause I’m just gonna inch it up the scale. – A seven? – I didn’t love it that much. – I’m gonna give it a five. – I really like this one. – Really? – I may have to readjust my scale, but I’m giving this an eight. I reserve the right to go above 10 in another round. – [Link] Well I think that brings us to a 20. – [Rhett and Link] Round three. – Uh-oh. – Look, now this one is just so red. – It’s ketchup. Which incidentally, when we went to London, we were given salsa and they gave us ketchup with onions in it. – Ew. – Go ahead. – So let’s– – This looks like it comes in a giant industrial-sized tub. – Yeah, this is one of the ones that comes in like a Arizona tea jug. – Oh my God, it actually smells like the ketchup. – Oh wow. – Yeah. – I really, guys, I have like a phobia of ketchup. Like I actually do. – Well I don’t like tomatoes but ketchup’s fine with me. You’re scared of ketchup? – Yeah. – It’s not that much different than salsa. – This is brave for me. – No but you’re right. – All right. – Looks just like ketchup. – [Rhett] This has a very ketchup-y taste. – Oh no no no. – It’s a very, this tastes like London salsa. – All right. – Is Tostito’s in London? – Oh my God, it tastes like if you order at a restaurant kid’s spaghetti and this is what comes on it. – Yeah. (Link chuckles) I give it a two, it’s horrible. – This is horrible, this is– – I wanna say one but you never know, it could get worse. – Now you thought the last one was La Victoria, but I’m pretty sure this is it. – Really? – Yeah. I’m givin’ it a two as well. – I’m gonna give it a two. – That’s a bad salsa, y’all. – [Link] And that’s a total of six. – [Rhett and Link] Round four. – Oh look, I can see things in this. – [Eva] This one looks nice. – [Rhett] It’s also darker, doesn’t look like ketchup. I see actual seeds in there. – Seeds? – That’s good. – Like seeds from things. – And look, I see onions. – Seeds is not good, is it? – I like seeds, you’re not a seed man? – I like seeds. – And it’s chunky. – See this is really confusing me now ’cause throughout all the brand names, this looks good and I just don’t know which one it is. – It’s darker. Let’s see if the taste is spooky. – Kinda sweet, why is it sweet? – Man, it looks great. It does not taste good. – Why’s it sweet? – It’s really sweet but– – It’s also spicy. – It’s spicy. The seeds. – Yeah, yeah. For this to be a mild to be this spicy, boy, I’d hate to meet spicy on the street. Hello, my name is Spicy, ooh. – I really– – That’s how the conversation would go. I would say ooh. (chuckles) – It tastes fakey at the beginning. – Yeah, it gets better as you keep going. – I do appreciate the effort they put into the spice. It looks good, it ends good, the middle is real bad. – Three. – It’s like my life. – I’m gonna give this a six. – Oh you like this one kinda? – I mean– – You like spicy. – Yeah, but the sweet is just no. – I’m going with a three. – Yeah. – Three. – That brings us to a total of– – 12. Round five. – Here it is. – Wow. This one’s got like little, like black things in it like it burnt some peppers in there which that’s good. – [Eva] That looks nice. – It’s also very, very bright. – It’s like a restaurant experience. – This is like a nice one, like a homemade restaurant one. I’m gonna get a little black thing in my chip. – It smells like tomato sauce though. – Oh it does. – Just straight up Boyardee. – It does, it smells like canned soup. – No. There’s a smokiness to it. You know me. I’m a smoky man, I like a smoky plan. – Oh there’s the smokiness but it’s too sweet. – You (chuckles), I don’t taste sweetness at all. – Really? – I only taste the smoky. It’s like someone just– – Going in again. – It almost tastes water– – Smoked a cigarette and just infused it. (inhales) – Does it almost taste watery with a little smoky, like smoky water? – Yeah it’s like a damp cigarette. – Hold on but just give ti a chance for a second ’cause a lot of people like, for me being one, like that smokiness of a, I don’t know what it is. It’s almost like a Chipotle. I think there’s a strong Chipotle flavor in there. – It’s like a tomato mezcal. – Tastes like you made Chef Boyardee, dipped a cigarette in it– – With some mezcal. – It’s not my favorite, I gave an eight to my, it’s not as good as the one that I said was the best. I like the smokiness but other than that– – Are you going big? – It’s not doing, I’m going with a seven. – Okay. – So pretty good but not incredible. – I don’t like smoky. Unless it’s with the bandit. (chuckles) so I’m gonna give this, I gotta give this a two as well. I just don’t like it. – Oh come on. – I’m giving this a three. – [Rhett] And that brings us to 12. – [Rhett and Link] Round six. – Now this one has little black little checks in it. I don’t know if that’s pepper or– – [Link] Black checks? – You know, black spots, and this might mean that– – You said that about all of ’em almost. – No, the last two. – Oh gosh, what’s happened? – You lost your chip in there. – I’m like, I’m like– – Oh! – This is so chunky, look how chunky it is. – This one smells like tomato sauce too. – Man. I would have never thought that salsas could be so different. – This one is very, almost sour, am I right? – There’s something strange happening here. – Why are you laughin’? You think I’m just makin’ this up? – I just don’t know what this is. – Oh, this is Newman. Newman in a jar. – And then it almost fizzles out with no taste whatsoever. – Yeah it really is so mild on the end. – On the end of it it’s like you just got saucy water. – You’re like was I eating salsa? – This is the last one and we’ve been really hard on these salsas, like nothing has met our standard of salsas, like what are we doing? – This is a no. – I could still eat the whole bowl. – I’m actually fine with this one. – And that goes with all of them. – No I can’t. – This reminds me how much I don’t think about the food that I’m eating whenever I’m at a party, I’m just like. Somebody’s like, you know, that was actually dog turds. Oh! (Link chuckles) It was in a salsa bottle. – No matter what salsa ultimately shows up at the party, I’m gonna be eating that salsa. – Right, you acclimate to the salsa. – Yeah yeah. – I give it a six. – I give it a five. – I like it. – Give it a five. – I give it a four. There’s no taste in that. – That’s a 15. And Stevie? – [Stevie] Okay so if we come in– – What does that bring us overall? – [Stevie] The weird thing is, if this had been a brand guessing game, Link, you’re on it for some reason. Like you were gettin’ it. But the salsa– – Victoria, Newman. – [Stevie] To shun is La Victoria. You guys gave that a six. – Show that La Victoria, guys, toss it over here. – Yeah that was real bad. – [Stevie] But you’re gonna be kissin’ up on the Tostito’s brand salsa– – Really? – [Stevie] ‘Cause you gave that a score of 20. – Boom, so worst and best. I think you wanted La Victoria to be good, so you can have that. – Ew! – But see, it is watery. – Was this the one that was like tomato salsa? – Yep. – Yeah. – Gross. – Congratulations Tostito’s. You are the winner, and let’s kiss it. You wanna go first ’cause of, well– – Oh gosh, oh my gosh. – I couldn’t see it from my angle but– – Well she used her tongue. – All right. I guess I’ll use mine too. (Eva squeals) (Rhett laughs) I used to do that to the shower wall in middle school. – Uh I’m just gonna find the bottom and give it a little peck. – All right be sure to check out Eva’s channel My Life As Eva on YouTube. – Thanks for liking, commenting, and subscribing. – You know what time it is. – She’s knows what’s up. (Rhett laughs) – Hi I’m Rick. – And I’m Lauren. – And we’re at Chichen Itza, Mexico. – And it’s– – [Both] Time to spin the Wheel of Mythicality. – Chichen Itza. – Yeah! Click the top link to watch us rate bad trendy fashion in Good Mythical More. – And to find out where the Wheel of Mythicality’s gonna land. Hey hun, would it be a sin not to get one of our pins? Mythical and GMM enamel pins, now available at Mythical.store.