We’re putting even less effort into this Thanksgiving episode than we did last year. – Let’s talk about that. ((Intro Music)) – Good Mythical Morning and happy Thanksgiving. – There’s no need to say that. Nobody’s watching. – Right. As we discussed last year, so. So I’m talking to no one? – To no one. Right. – Uh, as you didn’t hear us say last year, and you’re not hearing me say now, we’re not putting any effort into Thanksgiving episodes because no one watches on Thanksgiving. – And that’s fine. We’re totally fine with that. – Yeah, we are fully prepared for this by being completely unprepared for this. – Yeah. And you thought that we didn’t put any effort into last year’s Thanksgiving episode? We put even less into this year’s. And for that the Mythical Crew gives thanks. It’s time for, Title of Episode Intentionally Left Blank. – Now it seems like there was a little bit of effort because that was a sketch. – Somebody drew something. – Somebody sketched a title. – And somebody had to take a picture. – And then realized that, hold on, this is too, there’s too much effort for no one to watch. – Yep. Because that would actually might be a good T-shirt, right there. – It’s just so hard to not put forth effort. – Well, you know what? Let’s see how little we can do, because last year we obviously did too much because we tried to do nothing. And you ended up watching it. Weird. – I think more people watched. – Yeah. – Last year than when we looked at the previous years where we tried so hard. – This year we’re making sure you don’t watch. – Right, so don’t you watch. If you’re watching, don’t watch. Don’t watch this. – Let’s center ourselves. We don’t have to speak. No one says that. We have to keep talking. I’m not we don’t have to do one of those like where we just don’t speak for a long time, but let’s just take some time to center ourselves. – That would be comedic effort. – Right. And we’ve done it before. – We’ve done that. Do you ever just do that when you, I’m centering myself. Do you ever do that? When you sit down and just think about the fact that there’s this desk and. We’re here. – Oh, like being the, being just. – Being present and just. – Okay, just a breather. Like, nobody’s watching. – Yeah, just breathe. – Yeah, here I am. I can feel my butt cheeks on. – Stevie, if you want to be present as well, you can. – [Stevie] You know, I’m fine. – She’s fine being elsewhere. Right butt cheek, left butt cheek, right butt cheek. – I like, I could work on my posture. – Don’t work on your, don’t put any effort into your posture. What’s the most effortless posture? – That’s usually what I’m doing, I’m just kind of like this. I’m always. – Kind of hunchy? What about a little? – I feel like you’ve got pretty good posture. You sit pretty close to the desk and you. – Yeah, yeah, yeah. So now I’m doing one of these. You know, I’ll even pull this back. Did you just. Did you just move a camera? – Yeah. Listen, Hitch, don’t move the camera. – Don’t put any effort into. – Just stand there. – Working. It doesn’t matter. – Don’t even look at what you’re seeing in the camera. ((Laughing)) – That’s right. Do something for yourself. Center yourself or whatever he was saying. I don’t know. Right butt cheek, left butt cheek. – I feel like this is as relaxed as I can be. – We’ve had so much, I mean, I’ve taken a nap I made a 20 minute video of me taking a nap. So I’ve already done that. – This is nice. It actually, this is a nice space. Have you ever thought about that? This is a nice space. Do you ever just come into the space? – Yeah, I walk in here sometimes. – You ever come in and sit down? – No, I’ve never done that like it’s like the final episode of Cheers or something? ((Laughing)) – I took a call in here once. – Really? At your seat? – Yeah. Because you were doing something in the office. Somebody was in the green room, and then I was like, should I go to an enclave? You know, we have enclaves. – You’ve actually done work at the desk? That’s not performance work? – I think maybe, and when I say I took a call like probably from my wife. Not a work call. Did you sit in your seat or were you pacing? – Well, I didn’t sit in yours. No, I sat down. It was like this. It was like. Hey. It was probably a lot like that. Hey. – Guess where I’m at right now. – I didn’t tell her. – Guess what I’m wearing. – Because usually when I say guess where I’m at right now, she’s like, are you in the toilet? And I’m like, no, why does it sound echoey? Because I’m tall. – It’s a long way to the ground. It bounces. – It always sounds echoey if you really think about it. I always sound echoey. So that was what I did one time. – Yeah, maybe I’ll come in here and work. I mean when nobody’s in here. It’s pretty. – It’s a good height. – Yeah. It’s optimized for. – It’s higher than a normal desk. Have you ever noticed that? Like, if you brought another desk in, it would be lower. – You know what? Let’s do that. – Yeah, do we have another desk? – Do we have another desk? Don’t go get another. I’m not asking for anybody to get a desk. – Do we have a measuring? Don’t do that. Hold on, I’m going to do this. See, they are all, they’re all at this desk. Don’t, now don’t put a camera on me. I’m going to go back to that desk and I’m going to do this and then I’m gonna come back and see how it compares. And I can hold it real steady here. ((Laughing)) – [Rhett] Now you watch. My hand is gonna. Can you move my chair? My hand is going to, my right hand is going to disappear, watch this when I hit the, watch this. – And let me put my hand on top of your other hand. I’m going to measure the distance between your hand and the desk. – [Rhett] Okay. – I’m gonna do that. I’m going to do this. And okay, now you can move. – Okay. – And then watch this. I’m bringing this over, in front of you, and watch this. – And bring it up. – Look at that. – Hold on, that’s. ((Applause)) – No. ((Laughing)) It was about like that. You messed me up, but like. – You got bigger as you came up. Your hands didn’t come up at the same speed. Yeah, yeah. But you, you see my point. – Literally, it was literally that much shorter. – I would say. – Literally. – It’s that much taller. – Yeah. It’s, bigger than an average desk. – I think that I think my bathroom counter height I assume you have that you have a higher bathroom. – I have no counter in my bathroom. – Oh, really? – No counter. It was that was one of the things when we redid the bathroom, I requested, I said, I don’t want to be able to put anything on any surface. – You just have a couple of buckets? – We just put things in the corners, kind of around around the bottom. And then there is a sink. – I know you have a higher. – No, I don’t, actually, – because we haven’t redone our bathroom. In fact, it’s really, really low. It’s probably about like that. – I’m still going to get ham this year. This is year two. – Yeah. – I’ve actually already ordered it. – Well, as you should. – I thought that went over well last year. – Well, I wasn’t there, so I don’t know. – Oh, yeah, you weren’t there. It went over well. – And I won’t be there again. Sorry, but we will also have one. Where I’m at. – So, all of that flack you gave me and then you weren’t even there and you’re not going to be there. – It wasn’t for me. It was for you. I wasn’t helping you for my sake. I’m not even a ham man. I do like ham, though. – It’s a great ham. Honey baked ham. You know, honey baked ham is paid what this episode is worth paying for to sponsor, which is nothing. – You can, just so you know, you can also just go to the grocery store. – Not as good. – It’s not as good. But that’s what we got last year at my brother’s house. Kind of a last minute thing. We’re like, Well, we should have some ham. And we sent the, the nephews. Well, my nephews, my brother’s kids and my kids. So it’s interesting because when you when my nephews and my kids get together, it’s like my brother’s kids and his nephews getting together, you know what I’m saying? Because my kids are his nephews and his kids are my nephews. You understand what I’m saying? ((Laughing)) So, so, just follow along, you’ll get it. When my kids and my nephews get together, it’s the same as my brother’s kids and his nephews getting together because my kids are his nephews, and his nephews are my kids. No, no, no. His nephews are his kids. No, his nephews are my kids. – And you’re, yeah, yeah. I do understand. – And his kids are my nephews. – Right. Right. – Yeah. So they all went to the grocery store and then they got, we got on a call because there was a few items that we needed. – You didn’t give them a list? – We gave them a list. But then you know how it is when you give your nephews and your kids a list or your brother’s kids and your nephews and your brother’s nephews and his kids. – Your brother’s nephews. – Which is kind of the same. – Your nephews and your brother’s nephews. – All the nephews, when you give all the nephews and all the kids a list. And then when they get there, you realize, oh, they’re some other things that we need. And that was when between the time that they left and the time that they got to the grocery store, that was when my sister-in- law. was like, I think we could use a ham and I was like, well, I think they probably have like nice hams at the grocery store. And they had a real nice ham at the grocery store that was probably a fraction of the price that you paid for a honey baked ham. We didn’t have to wait in line. – $100 for a honey baked ham. – Yeah, this was a 49. Maybe at max, maybe max. $49. – That’s about half as much. – [Stevie] Not a Harris Teeter situation? – You know what? It was a Harris Teeter, because that’s a really nice grocery store in North Carolina. – I wouldn’t say it was really nice. Harris Teeter is not the nicest grocery store. – In North Carolina? – But they’re. – It’s like Ralphs, but it’s like a really nice Ralphs, maybe a little bit nicer than a Ralphs. Have you been into one in North Carolina recently? – It’s got a pub in it. – No pub. But the thing I noticed about the grocery stores in North Carolina is the aisles. You could drive a F-150 down an aisle in North Carolina. It’s like they’re preparing for possibly needing to take cars inside there. – Or to double their aisles. – Why? Yeah, or to add more aisles. Exactly. Have you noticed this, Stevie? How wide the aisles are? – [Stevie] Big aisles in North Carolina. – The first time I came to California and I went to a Walmart, I was like, I could touch both sides of the aisle with my hands. I was like, What the crap is going on? – Well, our aisles out here. If you stop and there’s any sort of something special that’s not contained all the way within an aisle, there’s no way to get past the stopped person. – You can’t have two carts. – You can barely have two carts in an optimal clear aisle. – North Carolina you can get five carts. – So you can have a cart, sideways, another cart, and then you could still have, it’s like a four lane. – It’s a lot harder to block an aisle in North Carolina if you can, if you need to do that. I haven’t had to. ((Belch)) – See. ((Laughing)) I’m sorry. It just, doesn’t matter. – Don’t try to stop it. That would be. – That would be effort. I’m not going to I’m not going to stave off a burp or a fart. I mean, you’re secretly hoping I’ll fart. Honestly, like, what are we going to call this? No effort. – Link farts. – We give up. We give up again. I don’t know. What did we call it last year? – We have something to promote, but I know if I want to do it. – Well, the thesis of promotion is that there’s someone who who is susceptible to said promotion watching. I’m not going to go get it. But you can see that back there. Don’t get a shot of it. ((Laughing)) That’s the ((Laughing)) that’s the Mythical Guess Who? game. It’s a real collaboration with the people who make Guess Who? It’s a quarterly item. It’s been brought to my attention relatively recently. – You have to be a third degree member. Right? – That’s what I want to talk about. – And so if you’re not a third degree member, you have to join. By what time? Let’s get that out of the way. – By when? You got. – [Person] December 31st. – December 31st. – December 31st, that’s quarterly or annual. – Quarterly or annual. Okay. – There was a little bit of effort. So it was like, it was like a voice effort from over there. – I just want to talk briefly about something, so. – That qualifies you for it. The way that Society works is there are three degrees if you’re a third degree member. One of the perks, maybe the biggest perk of a third degree member is you get the quarterly item, the quarterly collectible, like if you were a third degree member. – And how much additional do you have to pay for it? – Nothing. – What? So it’s free? – It’s free. That’s you’re actually, by being a third degree member, you’re getting the quarterly items for free. That’s how the system works. Or maybe you’re thinking that your monthly or annual fee that you pay for a third of your membership covers the collectible. – Well, that’s another way to say it. – It’s not free. – Right, right, right. But if you are a third degree member, you get the quarterly collectible. – I like to say that it’s free. It’s free. – It was brought to my attention recently that someone said something along these lines. They said, boy. – [Link] I’m just going to take a leak. I would have joined I wouldn’t have joined so early if I knew I could get that by joining now, what did they say? – [Stevie] They basically, do we, should we mix in the sound from the bathroom into this episode. – Oh, yeah. – [Stevie] You think? Because that would be. – His microphone’s still on. – [Stevie] Yeah, okay. – Keep it. – [Stevie] Great. We’ll just have some of that, too. They basically were like, I would have joined third degree for Society earlier had I known that the quarterly collectibles came with the membership. – Oh, so, so they did know? – [Stevie] They, no. – They did know but they didn’t know. – [Stevie] They didn’t know. They thought that you had to join third degree and then you had to pay more for each item. Like it was just an access thing. – Right, and a lot of people some people liked that comment, which gave you the impression that other people thought the same thing. So what we’re trying to clarify now, because apparently we haven’t done a great job of it, is that if you are a third degree member, you get the quarterly collectible. – You’re still talking about this? – That’s kind of the reason to be a third degree. And then when we say, if you want this You got to join by a certain time. We’re talking to people who haven’t yet joined third degree. – [Stevie] Yeah, Link, we heard you pee. We did not hear you wash your hands. – Or flush. – [Stevie] Or flush. – No, we did. We did hear your flush. – I did flush. – But you didn’t wash your hands. – I did wash my hands, look. – It was brief. – What’s that? – [Stevie] Was it, were you using the silent water? The silent sink? – No, I wash my hands. ((Laughing)) Look, can you tell? – [Stevie] Now, how long are we going to play this bit? That you washed your hands when I’m being told you didn’t wash your hands. – As long as it takes. – Well, I, it’s a bit too much effort to contribute to this bit, but I hope you didn’t, you didn’t turn off your monitoring. – [Stevie] No, that’s what we’re saying. – Oh, you took it off. – James took the headphones off. – But you still recorded it? Okay. – But it went to the tape. – You could mix it in. – [Stevie] We will. – Oh, we will. – And then. But that would be effort. It would be a lot of effort. No, no, turning it down would be effort. – [Stevie] Exactly. We did discuss this while you were in the bathroom. – It’s just in there. – Okay, I’m fine with that. Typically, a pee break will be edited out. – The audiotape will tell the tale. And it already has. You already, you heard it. – [Stevie] I don’t think we did. – I did a little tinkle. I did a little sprinkle and I did a little flush and I did a little hand wash. – Good – Smell. – I’m not going to smell your hands. That’s, that’s not how we confirm. – Plus, I didn’t pee on my hand. – Right. Because you went hands, You went hands free, right? – Yeah, I do what I always do, it’s more of a raise the roof kind of. – Yeah, right. Always go hands free. – I don’t understand the people who like the urinal guys who like go with the high prop. – I saw a guy with both hands up recently like he was being arrested. He’s being arrested. – He was waiting to be. I did pat him down. – Did you pat him down? On the inside. – I went up. Oh, that’s the sound he made. – His pants were. – They stopped. Yeah, yeah, yeah. – I don’t like to touch more than I have to in a urinal situation, I can’t tell you how many times I’ve been in a urinal, panicked because I thought I was in the women’s restroom. And then I realized, but wait, I’m at a urinal. Like, I’ve literally had that internal dialogue probably 150 times. – What? What do you think’s gonna happen if you end up in the women’s restroom? – I don’t know. I’ve never been in there. What goes on in there? – Well. I mean. – A lot of toilet action. – You’ve been in one, like. – Not a lot of urinal action. – If you’re at a restaurant and it’s a one at a timer and the men’s. – Yeah, I’ve been at a one at a timer when it was like a semi emergency situation. – It is really nice in there. Typically. Yeah. – There’s so much less spray. – Yeah. And I don’t contribute to it. – Like, the floor of a men’s restroom is just teeming with, like, just urine pools. – Yeah, we shouldn’t talk about this anymore. We should probably just stop talking. – But it brings me strange comfort to know that I am indeed in a men’s restroom. – Um, if you would like to subscribe. ((Laughing)) – Don’t do it today. – This is not the day. – If you’d like to click a bell. – Do it tomorrow. – Not today. If you’d like to know what time it is. Not today. – Okay. Hi, I’m Carrie from Paducah, Kentucky. And this is my pet turkey. Tom Tom. Say hi, Tom. Cats got your tongue? Now it’s time to spin the Wheel of Mythicality. ((Turkey Growling)) – That makes you feel something, doesn’t it? – What was that noise at the end? Her stomach? Or a growling turkey? – You don’t have to. But there is an option to click the top link to watch us read from a telephone book from 1984. In Good Mythical More. – And to find out where the Wheel of Mythicality going to land. – [Rhett] If you want the Mythical Guess Who? game. Join third degree quarterly or annual by December 31st. Mythicalsociety.com.