Can we cut things perfectly in half, again? – Let’s talk about that. (psychedelic music) – Good Mythical Morning. – Now, I know there’s some people that might be nervous that we’re doing this again, but for the record, last time we did this, I did not kill or even maim a single person. – And we are all so proud of you for that. This is the second time we’re doing an episode inspired by the German game show “Beat the Henssler”, (Link giggling maniacally) where we try to cut strange things into perfect halves. I love doing this. – Yes. – And not to brag, but last time we did use a machete to cut a three-tiered wedding cake perfectly in half, down to the ounce, people! – And once again, I did not kill or maim anyone. – And we’re still proud. It’s time for “Wanna Go Perfect Halfsies?” Part Two. (jaunty music) – Welcome back to the slicey-dicey cleanly and nicely zone. – [Stevie] Okay, boys, you’re going to alternate attempting to cut items perfectly in half. Both halves- – Attempting? (Rhett laughing evilly) – [Stevie] don’t need to look the same, but they need to weigh the same. So you’re working as a team, but only one of you will be cutting each round. And to win the game, you must successfully complete at least three of the four rounds. But for this first round, Link will be cutting this enormous slice of pizza with either a- – Number one. – [Stevie] box cutter, or a giant ribbon-cutting scissors – Oh ho! These are ceremonial. – [Stevie] Mm hm. Yeah. Yeah. – So the thing about the scissors is that they’re very tempting, and I do want you to use them for the comedic effect. But I will tell you that they’re not gonna cut pizza well. But you know what? We’re here to entertain, so what side is what? – [Stevie] Well, we’re leaving it to chance. And, yes, Rhett, since you’re the non-cutter, you’re flipping the coin. And it looks like heads is on the box-cutter side. – Alright, so get the tails. – We wanna land on tails. – We want tails, ’cause I mean- – We wanna land on tails. Okay, I’m going for tails- – And I want it to say tails. – right, because you want the big scissors. – Oh, yeah. – And… Tails! – Yeah! (crew laughing) Yeah. Who want, who wants, who wants that? Me! – It landed on tails in this hand. (scissors rattling) (crew crying out) – Okay. Sorry. – [Stevie] Are you sure about that? (crew laughing) – Look at these! (scissors snapping) – [Stevie] Okay, I guess Link will be cutting the pizza with the giant scissors. – Seen that movie? Seen this movie? Seen it? – Judges, is it okay? – [Stevie] It’s fine. Well, I didn’t ask the judges, but I think they say it’s fine too. – Okay. Link, as your advisor here, I would say, obviously, you’re gonna be tempted to cut down the middle of the triangle if you’re gonna try to make two right triangles out of an isosceles. – Right. Right, right. Of course. – But maybe that’s too easy. – Maybe do this. – [Stevie] Okay, well, wait, ’cause I have a little help for you. ‘Cause remember, we have something called Weights Fargo. You have an account at Weights Fargo and it has 16 ounces. And the non-cutter, Rhett this round, may use however many ounces you’d like to buy a little bit of slack for the cutter. So if you withdraw five ounces, that means you can still win the round, as long as you get the two halves within five ounces of each other. – Sixteen ounces is a pound. Correct me if I’m right. – [Stevie] Mm hm. Mm hm hm hm hm. – And then we’re doing four rounds. So that would be about four ounces, give or take, per round. This is the first round. You have a perfectly sort of like uniformly shaped thing. I don’t think I should give you a full four ounces. I think I should give you three ounces. – Or less. – No! ‘Cause you’re also banking on the fact that they made this pizza perfect, and I can tell you there’s a sausage bundle right there. – [Link] Yeah, there’s more. There’s more sausage here. – This is a little bit of a, – it gets a little, – a little biggie here. – I think I need to do… – So I’m gonna give him three ounces. I’m gonna give my buddy three ounces. – I think I need to go… See, like if I turn this right here, there’s more over here, so I need to go- – And you can correct- – basically, here. – You can correct as you go too. Can I hold the pizzas? Judges, is that okay? – [Link] No, no, no. – I just wanna- – No, I don’t want you to hold the pizza. I want you to stand over there- – Okay. – and encourage me. – You can do it, Link. You don’t need your buddy to hold it. – [Link] I know that you, you want this part to cut. – [Rhett] But are you gonna do one giant big swoop? Is that what you’re gonna do? – [Link] Just… Just chill out. – [Rhett] Okay. Good. Good, good, good. – Oh yeah. Ooh, that’s nice! – Oh, wow. – I gotta start going this way now. – Oh, whoa, whoa. You need to serious over-correct. Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa! That’s too much of overcorrection. Hold on. – [Link] Then Ima go… – [Rhett] Aim for that. – [Link] I want to go to the point. That’s my thing. I have to go to the point. I feel like I’ve… – Oh, so you’re over-correcting to get back to the point. – I’m over-correcting to get back to- – Wait, wait, wait. (scissors snapping) – [Link] Too late. – [Rhett] You went way past the point. – Oh, yeah, I did. – Way past the point. Okay, you could still cut- – Oh, hold on. Let me- – You can still cut. You can still cut stuff. – You want me to trim that off? – Hold on. But I want you to think about this. – [Link] Look at how much- – [Rhett] Oh, these aren’t even close. – [Link] There’s so much more here. – You got a lop right there. You gotta lop that whole thing off. – Stop telling me what to do! – Hey, with the cake, man, I was perfect with the cake last time. – Well, I was the one who- – But I was telling you what to do after you cut the cake. Same exact scenario! – [Stevie] Well, guys, wait. – Just listen to me. – Hold on, hold on. The whole thing is about cutting something in half. So what is this multi… What’s happening about the not half part? – We’re trying to make it halves. He didn’t do it right. – [Stevie] Well, it’s his turn. – So we’re trying to make it halves now. – [Stevie] Well, the judges are… – I got it. – the judges don’t like this. The judges really don’t like this. – No. This is just like the cake last time. – Well, the cake fell apart. – The cake fell apart. So that’s why there was an exception for the cake. – If you wouldn’t have been yapping so much… (crew laughing) Oh, now you’re not talking. (crew laughing) – Well, I don’t know. If we’re stuck with this, we’re definitely gonna lose this round. – [Stevie] Well, don’t be mad at us! – We didn’t know that there was just one thing. Look, let me just get a little- – [Stevie] Okay. Yes, you did. You were trying to cut it exactly in half, and then this happened. – [Rhett] Hold on. Why’d you go in there? – ‘Cause I think this will look better. – [Rhett] Oh, god. Everything that fell off, bring it over here. – [Link] Yep, yep, yep, yep. Okay? – Okay. – [Stevie] Do you think that we don’t see what you’re doing? I’m confused. – Not after you’ve edited it out. – [Rhett] Okay, I feel good about this. – [Link] Okay. Yeah, I feel good about this. And then what are we gonna… Do you want us to… – I’m gonna fold it. – [Link] Do you want us to roll it up and throw it on there? – [Rhett] I’m gonna fold it. I’m gonna get all this on it. – [Link] Okay. – [Rhett] So get that nicely on there. – [Link] Ooh, that’s heavy. – [Rhett] It’s 2.12. – 2.12 ounces. – No. (chuckling) (crew laughing) No, that wouldn’t be ounces. I believe in us. (drum roll) Oh! God. – [Link] What? (drum roll intensifying) 2.12. – Yeah! (Link laughing) Yes! Yes! Yes! – Sorry. – Oh, my god! – [Stevie] Hold on. Sorry, I can’t hear myself, ’cause I did wanna hear myself when I said you’re disqualified for this round, – No! – because you did not follow- – We did it! – the judges’ orders. – The boys did it. – Perfect! – The halfsies boys did it! – The boys need to get the other rounds correct. – Perfect! (scissors snapping) – Our system is perfect! – Perfect. (scissors snapping) – We are half geniuses. – Perfect. (scissors snapping) – We’re half geniuses! – [Stevie] Out of the three of us, there’s one of us that’s an expert when it comes to scissors, and it’s not you two! – Hey, when we go to bed tonight, we know we’re half geniuses. – I think I’m becoming bi. (crew laughing) – Which comes as a surprise to? (jaunty music) Hey, the last quarterly collectible of the year on the Mythical Society is the Rhet & Link Action Figures. If you want this, you gotta sign up for quarterly or annual membership by the end of the year, December 31st. – Mm hm. Get your action figures on. – [Stevie] Okay. This round, Rhett will be cutting a paper mache volcano. So, Link, flip the coin to see if he’ll be cutting with a mini chainsaw or a steak knife. – Really want the mini chainsaw, – Mini chainsaw. – which is heads. Which is heads. – Let’s go heads. (coin clattering) Well… – You gotta pick it up. Pick it up and put it in your… – You gotta pick it up and look at it. And it says… – Heads! – Heads. (crew chuckling) – Judges? (all laughing) – We’re such bad boys. We’ve been disqualified while being perfect. – [Rhett] Link- – Are we good boys or bad boys? – You wanna do the honors of erupting in front of us? – [Stevie] Well, do you want to Weights Fargo it at all? – Oh. Yes. So last time, we did three and we didn’t even need ’em. – Can I touch it? – because we were perfect. – [Link] So it’s all paper. – So this is not- – It’s not symmetrical. – It’s not symmetrical. And I’m trying to find- – it’s very natural. – I’m trying to find a, I’m trying to find just the angle that it would even go on this thing. That is tough. I think I would go… No. I gotta find a split here. – Looking down from the top. – [Rhett] But it’s pretty light. I think I could do it with three ounces. – That way we’re keeping our, we’re banking another one. – Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. We’re gonna take 10 ounces into the last two. – We’re gonna get a three-ounce buffer, please. – [Stevie] Okay, cool. – Not that I need it. – [Stevie] We also have a little safety glove for your… Ew! – It’s good for you. – Three, two, one. (chainsaw whirring loudly) Well. You know, it would be cool it would be coming out, but I cut the whole back of it- – [Link] It’s erupting on the back. It didn’t erupt out. It erupted down there. – [Rhett] That’s what they call a geological fissure. – Yeah. Didn’t really work, did it? – [Rhett] Okay. – [Link] Oh, it’s still erupting down there. Look at that. – It was so easy with this thing. – I think this is just more of a magma squeeze. – Okay, the good news is- – Lucas is disappointed. (crew laughing) Sorry, Lucas. – [Rhett] Dang, man. And you got, you got red on my shirt. – [Link] Oh, whoa, whoa. Watch the fingers. (chainsaw whirring loudly) Dude, that thing is wild. – Okay, so I’m gonna just take this. Oh, oh, oh. Precarious, precarious, precarious, precarious. – [Link] What’s in here? – Oh, that’s not great. – That’s big. – Because look, the whole bottom of the cup went to one side. Oh, no. – [Link] Whoops. – It’s not even… (crew laughing) – I think, in fairness, you need to put all of that on that side. I mean, it’s part of the volcano. – [Rhett] I think I only need this. – Well. You can’t do that. They’re gonna disqualify… They’re gonna disqualify us again. – [Rhett] Okay, well, you take this and I’ll take this. So it’s like it was at the beginning. – Yeah. There we go. That’s right. That’s fair. Here we go. Alright, Ima throw mine on. Let’s see what the reading is for mine. (drum roll) Point nine or whatever. It’s a nine. There’s a nine. Zero and a nine. Zero and a five. – Oh no, old on. Take the cup off. Put the cup where it was, where it needed to be. Put it where they needed to be. (drum roll intensifying) Okay, so that’s literally what they, that’s literally what they were. – [Stevie] So you’re saying you tried to cheat and then realized- – No, no, no, no. No, no, no, no! – that your cheating- – No! – wasn’t gonna help you, – We just got confused. – [Stevie] so then you went back to not cheating. – Yeah, we don’t wanna cheat. – We don’t wanna cheat. Cheating’s for losers. Cheating’s for people who can’t win without it. We just got confused. – As you can see, we’re at seven ounces and five ounces, which is within- – which is a difference of two. – two ounces. – Hey, (Link laughing) here’s the thing. A lot of people don’t understand. You think you can do things, and you get out here in front of all the bright lights, – It’s harder than it looks. – and sometimes, you freeze up. (jaunty music) – [Stevie] Okay, this round, Link will be cutting a giant pumpkin, but will he cut it with a shovel or a two-person saw. – Oh, we need to lumberjack this pumpkin. – Two-person saw is tails. Tails. – Yeah! Nice! (clapping) – Take your saw over there, buddy. – You’re coming with me. Alright, let’s- – Okay, let’s examine, let’s examine this thing first. That’s a big pumpkin. – Whoo! Good gracious! – Don’t show the back. (chuckling) – The back is, you know, well- – [Rhett] Show the back. – This is the part where it lays down. So I kinda feel like, – Do you want to use that? – once it starts… It’s very teetery. Do you want to use he part that laid down for so many days as it grew? – I think that’s where it wants to be. – Ooh, yeah, yeah, yeah, If I look at it right here, – Well, don’t, don’t. – it feels.. Yeah, don’t stare directly into the head hole of the pumpkin. (crew laughing) Okay, the big thing here, (Link grunting) besides the pumpkin, is the stem is going in one direction. – So we wanna cut, do we want to cut the stem in half? I don’t… I think that’s gonna be too hard. – [Rhett] There’s gonna be guts falling everywhere. – [Link] I think we wanna go around the stem. – Are we gonna be redistributing guts into each side? Or if the guts fall out, the guts fall out? – [Stevie] We’ll allow the guts to be distributed, ’cause that seems fair. – Just like the cake. – [Stevie] That seems like a nice thing to do. Do you want ounces from your account? – Oh, yeah. Yeah. This is so big, we need a lotta ounces. (crew laughing) – Alright, so- – Okay. – And then go over there and let’s eyeball where we’re gonna cut this thing. So we have- – We have 10 ounces on the board. We’ve got two rounds left. There’s so much weight here. We don’t know what the fourth round is. I think we gotta hedge our bets. – We gotta go-. – I think we gotta go- – Six. – I was gonna say seven. – [Link] Okay. – [Rhett] So on my end, I’m gonna show you the middle on my end. And I’m gonna, I’m gonna put my hand in the middle and I’m gonna come up. – I think I need to go a little bit= – Basically, right in the middle of that, that one right there, whatever you call that. That section. – Yeah. Right there? – No. If you do that, I’m gonna, I’m going to completely miss the stem. – That’s what you want. Well, this right here- – I wanna go right through the stem. – That’s gonna be hard, man. – [Rhett] I think we got it. – Alright. – Who pushes first? – I push first. – [Rhett] Oh. Okay, I’m gonna put… Hold on. Let me do this. – How are we gonna? Give me your left glove. Pull. – [Rhett] Yes! – Oh! Ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho! – [Rhett] Okay, okay, okay, okay. Okay. I’m looking good. (saw scraping) – [Link] This is what the lumberjacks, right? – [Rhett] Yeah, the pumpkinjacks. – We’re making a lumber jack-o’-lantern. Is this where you want it? – [Rhett] Okay, I’ve come to the stem, and I’m almost in the middle of it. – This thing is so efficient. – What you got over there? Yeah, ’cause it’s used to cut wood, not pumpkins. – I’m just to the right of- – [Rhett] Do you feel good about that? – the tukus. Yes. – And I’m just to the, I’m just to the right middle of the stem. It’s perfect. – Yeah, I’m feeling good. (saw scraping) Oh, wow. – [Rhett] Oh, yeah. It goes right through. Oh, yeah. – This is satisfying. – [Rhett] Easy. Oh, easy money. Okay? Well, the guts… (saw clattering) – Getting that outta there. And check this out, kids. – Man, that’s what a pumpkin looks like! – And not a lotta guts came out. – Okay. So we’ve got trays. (both grunting) Maybe we should do this as a two-man thing. – Okay, here we go. (grunting) Okay. And is that, is it in the middle of the thing? Okay. – Yeah, it’s 50 pounds and one ounce. (crew laughing) – So now grab this. Let’s go. (drum rolling) Come on! Come on! Fifty-three. – Oh, wow! – Well, we said we gave ourselves seven pounds, so, (buzzer jangling) (crew laughing) Hey, that was, that was really, really hard to do. – Even for us. – And look, I mean, most of the stem is on my side, and my side is the light side. So I think this was just impossible. – Who woulda known? If we can’t do it, who could? Bring ’em in. Brin in someone who coulda done it. – Yeah, we’d like to see you. – Alright. (jaunty music) – [Stevie] Okay, this round, we’re keeping it a secret what Rhett’s cutting. – Well, it looks like a person. – [Stevie] Well, maybe it is! But are you cutting this person with an ax or manual hedge trimmers? Also, you know- – Emmanuel’s hedge trimmers? – Thank you, Emmanuel- – I didn’t know Emmanuel was working for us right now. – for sharing your hedge trimmers. – [Stevie] You know what? I was gonna give you a chance to still win, but… Okay, I will. If you get it exact, you can still win. – [Rhett] Oh, down to the ounce? – [Stevie] Well, must we go through the history of this game to see why this is a give? – The bigger question is, – I really want the ax. – do you think you want the ax? – I think I want the ax, which is heads. – Okay. – I’m good. I’m good with a ax. I’m not gonna hurt anybody, including myself. – I’m going with the coin flip. – Heads! – Heads. (crew chuckling) Right there. Heads. It happened. – Shall we reveal? – Yes. Oh, my god, it’s an alien! Wow. This is a rip. Can I touch it? This looks like my Reddit thread. Look at this guy. – What is he made of? – Hi. – Oh, hey, we can get this. We can get this. It’s light. – [Link] He’s made of lightness. – [Rhett] Okay, Link. (dummy thumping on table) Now, there is one- – I can’t! Whoa. He’s alive! – There is one axis by which a human or extraterrestrial body can be divided into two perfect halves, and that is crotch to head. But that’s gonna be hard with an ax. – Yeah, but that’s gonna be fun. I wonder, is there an alien brain in here? – [Rhett] Let me get on this side here. – So you’re gonna have to, you’re gonna have to hack that. – Is it gonna bounce? – Oh, man. Yeah. There’s gonna be some bounciness. (hatchet tapping rhythmically on dummy head) Oh, wait, wait, wait, wait. – Okay. (chuckling) This might be a problem. Maybe… Okay, can I pierce it like this? (hatchet tapping on dummy head) (crew laughing) – Maybe we need to toss the coin again. – Maybe we need Emmanuel’s hedge trimmers. (crew laughing) – [Link] Here, let me, let me, let me toss the coin. We gotta be proper with all this. – Yeah, yeah. Come on. So, tails, tails,. – Tails. – [Rhett] Lift. – Bring your hands that way. Ooh, that’s… (Rhett grunting) – [Rhett] Sorry, Emmanuel. – [Link] Choke up on it. Really get the… Choke. Let me. – So I got a nice split. I got a nice split. – Oh, yeah, that’s a- (crew laughing) That’s the shot we’re looking for. – Okay. Can you put the legs, can you do this for me? – What about one of these? – Yeah, yeah, yeah. Exactly. That was what I was gonna ask you to do. (crew laughing) You got a good shot of that? I just wanna, just wanna… Wow, need to get out in the sun more. Okay. You’re too far from me. Yeah. (crew laughing) – [Link] And then bring your, bring your hands to your right. You’re going too much at this of an angle. – [Rhett] I see now. I see this. – Okay. (Rhett grunting) – Man! Alright, come on. Come on. Skewer it. Skewer it! Dammit! Dammit! Skewer it! Dammit! Skewer it! It’s an alien. – It’s not alive. – Okay, I’m pushing it down. Now you just rip. Rip it. (both grunting) – [Rhett] Yeah, that’s it. Okay. – [Link] Okay. – [Rhett] Alright. – Okay. Lucas. – [Lucas] Yeah. – Can you help us? – What are y’all doing? – [Link] Nothing. (Rhett laughing) We just, we found this guy. There you go. So go deep into the head. – [Rhett] Watch out. Watch your hand. I’m going deep. Emmanuel needs to sharpen these shears. (mini chainsaw whirring) – [Link] Oh. It’s smoking. – [Rhett] Oh, look, I hit… Oh! Oh! – What? – Oh my god. – [Rhett] There’s a piece, there’s a piece of wood inside his head. – That explains a lot. (crew laughing) (mini chainsaw whirring) – [Rhett] Oh, there’s also metal in it. – [Link] I think… Ooh. (mini chainsaw whirring) (mini chainsaw continuing to whirr) Yeah! – [Rhett] Yeah! – Yeah. (crew clapping) How smart are you now? – [Rhett] Where’s that wood? (mini chainsaw whirring) – [Link] There it is. – [Rhett] Okay. Okay. Okay. Alright. Okay, keep it even, keep the foam distribution even. Oh, oh, nice. – [Link] Now you pull. – [Rhett] I can cut that wood out for you. (mini chainsaw whirring) – Ha! We have removed the tracking device. – This is gonna be exactly the same. I’m telling you right now. I can feel it. I’ll start on my side. I’m gonna blow this off. And we are dealing with five pounds, five ounces. (drum roll) – Come on. (drum roll intensifying) – Hold on, but for a second. – [Link] Wait, is it? – [Rhett] for a second, it was. For a second, it was. – Oh. Oh! The tracker. Hold on. (drum roll) (crew laughing) Well, you can’t break the cooch cruck. (mini chainsaw whirring) (drum roll) Throw that over there. (crew laughing) – [Rhett] I tried to distribute it evenly. (drum roll) – [Link] Yeah! (drum roll) Yeah! (buzzer jangling) (crew laughing) Well, you know what? We can’t tell anybody about this anyway. – That’s right. Yeah. If this was perfect, it would go viral. People would know we’ve got an alien. – [Stevie] You tried, but in the end did not win, which means that only half of you will be able to appear in Good Mythical More. – Thanks for subscribing and clicking that bell. – You know what time it is? – My name’s Chloe and for my sister’s birthday, I got her two tickets to the Good Mythical Tour on November 16th to meet Josh and Emily. And it’s time to spin the Wheel of Mythicality. – We’ll see you there. – [Link] Yeah. – Click the top link to find out if you should name your child Idaho or Alaska, in Good Mythical More. – And to find out where the Wheel of Mythicality’s gonna land. – [Rhett] Get the Rhett and Link action figures. Join now at mythicalsociety.com.