Today we enjoy our favorite midnight snacks. Let’s talk about that. ♪ (theme music) ♪ – Gooooood mythical morning! – Mythical beasts, I can tell that you are thirsty. That you are in fact parched because you are isolated out in the desert of unanswered questions. And here we go, trekking out to meet you with the life-giving answers that you need like a little kitty cat just slurping up a saucer of milk. (slurping noises) Just satiating your thirst. Except it’s not milk, it’s water, and you’re a human, you’re not a cat, and it’s not a desert, it’s Facebook, Tumblr, or Twitter, and it’s questions not water. – It’s all very clear. Very clear analogy. Thank you for that, Link. I know exactly where you were going with that and I’ve arrived there, and let’s start with the first question from – – Related to cooking advice. – Cooking! Yes, cooking. – Of course – Uh, this is from @ThatBeatles_fan on Twitter asks: – 3AM that’s…wow! First of all, don’t make cookies because it takes too long. When you’re getting up for like a post- midnight snack, you gotta have something that’s quicker, but that’s equally satisfying to cookies. And we both have answers. We are going to let you in on our secrets of our favorite midnight snacks. I’m gonna start. – Okay. – And I’m gonna give this to you, and you can experience it vicariously. Of course – – I make lots of noises while I eat, so you can experience it. – It starts with a bowl of Frosted Mini Wheats, because… – Got it. – …all of my meals start with that if I’m in a charge of ’em. – It’s a good base for any meal. – Now this is my breakfast. This is not my midnight snack. But what I add to it is, of course, a little bit of peanut butter. So I just put that on there like that. Here, let me give you milk. – There’s a lot of steps to this process. – Little milk here, you take this. – I feel like I’m going to get confused. – And you just start eating this, and then I add a little chocolate too. – What in the world? – This isn’t breakfast, this is midnight snack, man. – But there’s peanut butter in this spoon – Now here’s the interesting thing. You dip it in, and get a few of the Mini Wheats, and don’t eat all the peanut butter at once. Like, you’re gonna take off a layer of peanut butter in your mouth – Like an excavation? – Yeah. It’s like you’re gonna eat a little bit of peanut butter with every bite of – no, there ya go. (laughs) Go for it. – It’s hard to eat your thing, man, – No, that’s good. And now you might wanna drink a little bit of the chocolate milk that you’ve made out of the side. And you’ll have to pick up the bowl to do that. – It’s so sweet man, what is wrong with you? – It’s so good. – It’s like every way you can get sugar into your body at once. You should also inject yourself with sugar while you’re eating this. – (laughs) – I mean, it’s good, but I’m not four! – But the think I love about it is that – – You know what I’m sayin’? I’m a man. I’m grown up! – It’s the challenge of not eating all of the peanut butter at once, but just eating a little bit of it. – You got a napkin over there? – Actually yeah, I do. – Mm, thank you. – But yeah, I do call this the ‘I Am Not an Adult’ midnight snack. – Well okay. I’ll save that for later. – Do it guys! Highly recommend. – Mine is pretty simple. I’ve actually talked about this on the show before. – But we’ve never eaten it. – I’ve never presented it to you. This is what I used to do in high school and I haven’t done it very often, but now that we’ve made one today, I’m very excited about doing this on a regular basis. This is very simple. You just take a layer of Ritz crackers, put it on the plate, and then you put shredded cheese on top of it, and then you pepper it with some blue cheese, and you microwave it, and it makes a cheese disc, Link. – The Cheese Disc? – Partake. Well it can be a cheese frisbee or a ‘chees-bee.’ Yeah, you wanna get the whole thing loose. – Are you telling me you ate – – Loose it from the plate! – I mean, what you lack in sugar, you certainly make up for in calorie count. – I’m a savory man, man. I like savory things! Look at that, is that not – Oh, goodness gracious, look at that thing. – The calories associated with this! – Just take a bite out of it. Take a bite out of it. Tell me that’s not good. I need to get some of that. – I don’t love blue cheese. – You can also fold it like this. Look at that. Choo, choo, choo, choo! – I didn’t get any blue cheese in my bite, so that was pretty good. – Mm! That is so good! It’s SO good! – So if your parents heard a rustling in the kitchen that sounded like a racoon microwaving something, they would come down and you’d be eating an entire cheese disc? – Yeah. I usually took it to my bedroom. – Really? You would eat it in bed? You’d like lay on your belly like… – There’s a lot of crumbs and cheese bits in my bed growing up. Okay, now it’s time to get awkward. Last week we reenacted one of our own, favorite, awkward teenage moments, but this week we’re going to bring one of your stories to life. – Because we believe that, instead of letting embarrassing moments haunt you, you gotta celebrate those, y’all. You gotta laugh about that. – That’s right! So, just like teen awkwardness will end, teen acne will end, and we’ve teamed up with our friends over at Clearasil to reenact some hilariously awesome, awkward teenage moments. – Alright, now this week’s story comes from Dakota, AKA @fableheart on Twitter. It’s a classic, teenage love story, really, except it’s entirely more awkward. – Okay, and just a quick note. All of the details from our dramatization are taken directly from Dakota’s submission. – It’s time for… – Meet Dakota. High-schooler and self- described awkward kid. – I’m Dakota. I’m awkward. – Dakota had never really approached a girl before, but then one day, he made the fateful decision to wear a suit to school. – ♪ I got on a suit at school, a little over-dressed, but still totally cool. ♪ – McKenna was a girl who had caught Dakota’s eye. She was beautiful and interesting. – I’m McKenna. I’m beautiful and interesting. – Dakota’s suit made him feel like a businessman. And it was time for a transaction with McKenna. So while she was on the phone, he approached her, attempting to walk as cool-ly as possible. – ♪ I don’t care if you think I’m crazy. This suit gives me the confidence to approach a lady. ♪ – I just wanna change the world, I mean, there are so many problems like the rainforest, and wells, and the human- dolphin language barrier, and panda obesity. It just all keeps me up at night. – As Dakota walked toward McKenna, he thought about what to say. – I could ask her what she thinks about my suit, but I already know it’s awesome, so maybe I could just say “Hi!” No, that’s too simple. Too normal. You know what? I’m a clever guy. I’ll figure out what to say when I get up to her. – I have seven nipples. – Seven dimples? – I have seven nipples. Three rows of two, and one on my hip. Extra nipples are actually not that uncommon. – Dakota never ended up dating McKenna, but McKenna did go on to form the International Network for Non-Normal Nipple Numbers. Here’s to you, Dakota, and your awkward moment that didn’t last forever. – Now, he actually did tell McKenna he had seven nips, but we made up the part about the International Network for Non- Normal Nipple Numbers. – Full disclosure. But, you know what, I’m guessing if you do want to start that, a lot of non-normal nipple havers will come out of the woodwork and join you. – Oh, they will. Hey, do you have an awkward teenage story that you want to tell us to reenact on GMM? Of course you do! So go to: Submit your story for a chance for us to reenact it, in all of its awkward glory right here on Good Mythical Morning. – Now let’s move on to something a little less awkward: another question! – Lucy Poppins asks: – Okay, great question, Lucy. Okay, 10 people, a microwave, you’re gonna need multiple microwaves, I think. And you know what? That can get expensive. This reminded us of a show that we used to enjoy back in North Carolina – a public access show starring two guys who would tell you how to use everyday, household items to make everyday, household items – to save money. – Right, it was very riveting AND we have found some footage, so we’re gonna show you how they tell you how to make a microwave. – Hey hey! – Here is is. – Welcome to DI Why Are You Buyin That? I’m Nugget. – I’m Twig! – And together we are… – Twig and Nugget! – Your hosts for DI Why Are You Buyin That – Listen, a lot of people waste a lot of money on things that they shouldn’t be spending money on, like college savings, fresh fish… One of the things I see people doing is microwaving. – Microwaves are flying off of the shelf, and I’m just sittin’ there in the corner lookin’ I’m askin’ to myself, “D.I. why are you buyin’ that? – The way I see it, there are two ingredients to a microwave: heatin’ and spinnin’. Now, that’s what I do in the club as well. – So Step 1: go into your mother or your wife’s cabinet. – I got these, man. – And then you might find a spinning device – They call this a Tired Suzanne. – Right. – First thing you’re gonna wanna do is you gotta find something to microwave. And we found this chicken. He was like a pet to me. I don’t want you to do motions with his body. No, that makes me feel uncomfortable – Hey! I am a pet. Dearly beloved, we have killed this chicken because we are hungry. Amen. – That’s good enough. – Now if you’re not careful, you might resuscitate this puppy. It’s not a puppy, it’s a chicken. – Now you can see – hold on. Just listen to that sound. (farting noises & laughing) – That’s right. You’re filling it full of marinade. That hollow sound is the sound of dinner. At this point, by a show of a hands, how many people have a blow dryer layin’ around their house? Or if you go to a motel and you just snatch it. And here we go. As you can – oooooh! 3, 2, 1… heat! – The faster you spin, the faster it cooks – … the faster it turns! – No, the faster you spin, the faster it cooks. – That ain’t true! It’s gonna take – the faster you spin, the more likely it is to not stay on the Susan! – If your chicken falls off… – Put it back on! – Whooooo! – Whoo! Whoo! – You think that’s good? – I think that’s good. It’s as moist as a flat rock in a rain storm. – Now the way I test the chicken is just by ripping its shoulders off. – Right. Make him fly. Make him fly. – If you can just pop a shoulder off like that, then… So next time you find yourself in the microwave department, ask yourself the question, “D I why am I buyin’ that?’ – And then do this instead. – Okay, so when you build your own microwave and cook some stuff with it, be sure to send us pictures. – Yes. Thanks for liking and commenting, and if you’ve been enjoying this show, make sure to subscribe! – Please do. You know what time it is. – This is Keith Reynolds, from Seaside Park, New Jersey, and it’s time to spin The Wheel of Mythicality. – Thanks to Clearasil for sponsoring this episode, and remember to go to: to submit your story! – Click through to Good Mythical More where we’re gonna open your mail. Lots of good stuff for the museum. Also, the most amazing duct tape sculpture we’ve ever gotten. – Digestion: the Musical! – ♪ Yeah, you know that I love to eat stuff, why? ♪ – ♪ ‘Cuz it tastes so good! ♪ – ♪ And then it goes into my throat ♪ – ♪ Then it goes into my throat. ♪ ♪ And then it goes into my stomach. ♪ – ♪ Esophagus and my stomach and my ♪ small intestine and my … large intestine. ♪ – ♪ It’s goin’ a little slower than you’re saying. ♪ – ♪ Yeah! ♪ – ♪ That’s true. ♪ – ♪ Now it’s in my stomach. There it is, I feel it. I can’t wait ’til it comes out? ♪ – ♪ Well my name is Leslie and I’m here to say, I love peanut butter in a major way ♪