GMM 747: 5 Ridiculous Dating Sites

There are plenty of fish in the sea, and, it turns out, a lot of those fish are – on the Internet. – Let’s talk about that. ♪ (theme music) ♪ – Good Mythical Morning! – Way back in the day, finding love on the Internet was weird. You know? – Sure, websites. – Dating websites. It’s like, “Ew, you found somebody on the internet?” – Mhm. – and then it became normal, and now it is becoming weird again because dating websites are becoming so – commedically specific. – Huh! Like, the nitch of the nitch! The neesh of the neesh! The neesh of the nitch! You mean like FarmersOnly, which I have spent a lot of time on. – Really? – Oh yeah. – Yes. Just to scratch the surface, – Yep. I’ve found a love boat load of websites where people meet other people,– You like that? And I have devised a game for you so that you can decide: Is this crazy sounding dating website a – truly real website, – A truly real website? – or a fakely fake one that I made up? – Okay. It’s time to play: (singing) I Wanna Know What Love Is and I want these possibly fake dating sites to show me. – Catchy. – (singing) Yeah. – (not singing) Hm. – I’m excited about this game. – Does it involve more singing from you? – No. Thank goodness. – Good– ness. – Alright. Listen. – There’s some big stakes here today. – Where? – We’ve got– – (inaudible) We’ve got a big announcement to make at the end of this episode. – (laughs) That’s the dumbest joke of the day. – Well, I said love boat load, so. – I just beat you. – Eh. – Okay. Glad. Me glad. – I almost said New York Strip. If you get five of these right, you win the glorious position of being able to give the mythical beasts the amazing announcement that we’re – gonna give at the end of this thing. – Oh. If not, I get to give the announcement and receive all the glory associated with – giving said big announcement. – That’s quite a prize. Quite a prize. Alright. Real dating website or not? Play along at home people. SinglesWithFoodAllergies.com. >From their website it says: – Mhm. – Celiac and sexy? Dairy-free and dynamic? – Oh. – You’ve discovered a very useful website for singles with food allergies. Join now! Now, this is the kind of thing that, if it did not exist, it should. Right? – Because how many times– – Right? – Yeah. Right! – (crew laughing) Because how many times are you with somebody and they’re like, – (funny voice) “Oh I can’t eat clams.” – And you’re annoyed. (normal voice) And you’re like, “Well why am I with you?” – (crew and Link laughs) – Yeah. Yeah I really wanna eat clams more than be with you. Right. Yeah, but if you could just take that out of the equation, you know there’s gonna be some annoying food allergy right there at the – beginning. – Celiac and sexy? Dairy-free and dynamic? – Is it real or not? – That’s bad copy, but I do believe that it is a real website. – You’re right on both accounts. – (ding sound) – (laughs) Hey! – Bad copy and a real website. The official tag line is: Nowhere else will you find so many divorced, never married, or widowed individuals who’s lives are – affected by food allergies. – Widowed? Yeah, they gotta work on their copy. – Wow. – (crew laughs) – See us for that. – That’s good! You’re setting us up for the big announcement. Next one. – BikerKiss.com. – (Rhett and crew laughs) – Why are you laughing? – Biker kiss? – Don’t laugh. – Biker kiss? Whether you’re riding cross-country or off-road on a chopper, a cruiser, or a vintage bike, Biker Kiss is where you’ll find love. Now, again, I feel like a biker dating website exists, but I don’t feel like it’s called BikerKiss. Bikers wanna do more than just kiss, man. – (crew laughs) – They wanna wear leather vests. What? Well, yeah. I’m glad you finished that sentence. – (Link and crew laugh) – Is it real or not? (laughs) It’s not real, man. That’s fake. – Nope, it’s real, dude. – What?! – (buzzer sound) – (crew laughs) Their official tag-line is: Two wheels. Two hearts. One road. (Rhett) Oh gosh. Now that is good copy. – Yeah, that’s pretty good. – Yeah. If you could’ve told me that I would’ve got it. – Two wheels. Two hearts. One road. – You would’ve never come up with that. – (laughs) – I mean, I think that’s actually a biker – come-on line. – Two hearts. One wheel. What is it? – Two wheels. Two hearts. One– – That’s a unicycle website. – (both laugh) – Alright, – Does that exist? – You did not get that one. Could you see yourself visiting IDontBelieveInUs.com? – Oh gosh. What? – Welcome to the premiere dating website for nihilists and the people who love them. We believe in nothing, but we do it together. – Hm. – IDontBelieveInUs.com – Oh. That’s very clever. – Nihilists. Very clever. Nihilists are not clever. – Sure they are. – They don’t believe in being clever. – That’s now how it works, – They don’t believe in anything. – but they’re all typically pretty clever. – Uhm. – (crew and Rhett laughs) – Wow. I don’t believe in us. I feel like the process of creating a dating website would be something so ante to their core values that it could never happen. – So I’m going to say this is – Nihilists don’t want to date? – not a real website. – I don’t agree with your reasoning, but you stumbled upon the correct answer. – (ding sound) – Yay! – (clapping) – It is fake, – and let’s just move right along. – Okay, let’s do that. – I wouldn’t care about what (inaudible). – Right. I don’t have to say anything. I made it up. Vampersonals.com. – Can you guess what this one’s about? – Can you repronounce that? – Vampersonals.com. – Oh. I thought you said van-personals. – (Link and crew laughs) – I was like, – Whether you want to meet others like you – “Okay that probably exists.” for simple recreation or find that special someone to shine within the dark for you. Come check us out. We don’t bite too hard. (evil laugh) – (crew laughs) – It’s– – Vampires. – It seems crazy, right? – Vampire dating site. – The thing that I have learned– I’ve actually known about this. There is a movement of people who consider themselves vampires and they drink blood, but they’re not actually vampires. Like the people with the teeth that have undergone some sort of, you know, transformation. – They’re just weird folks. – Oh. They’re not really vampires? Not really vampires. Those are in Eastern Europe. So are you trying to say that this is a real site for fake vampires? – Yeah. – Or a fake site for real vampires? – This is a real site for fake vampires. – Correct. – (ding sound) – Hey! Whoop whoop! Look at that right there. That’s a nice looking website. Vampersonals is one of the largest dating sites where you can meet vampire, – (Link) goth, or both. In your dreams. – (Rhett) And the goth’s in. – (Link) Enjoy the dark side of – (Rhett) Keep it vampire. the unlife. Alright. How many does he have so far? You got three right. Alright. You’re setting up for success here. Repotted.com. Repotted.com. Are you a divorcée with a green thumb? Repotted.com is the world’s foremost dating site for divorced people with a passion for gardening. – Love can sprout anew. – I can think of so many better names for– – Oh sorry. For their website. – We’re you just scared by your mug? – Yeah. A little bit. – (crew laughs) Thought I saw a plant in there. Repotted. Repotted? I mean– I mean, yeah. You’re divorced. You’re into bonsai. That’s half true about me. Did you hear about that? I have a bonsai now. Not divorced. – I saw your Instagram. – It really is a peaceful thing. It’s a very peaceful experience. I could definitely see how you can fall in – love with somebody. – Just give me the answer. I think plants and love really go together. – I’m gonna say this is true. – It’s false. I made it up. – (buzzer sound) – I mean, if you think about it, people who garden just want to be by themselves and be divorced. – They don’t wanna get back in. – They just wanna be with a plant. Right. So you didn’t get it on that one. What about TheUglyBugBall.com? Dating for the aesthetically average. It’s like a nice way to say, – “I think I’m ugly, and I want–” – Ugly bug ball? – (crew laughs) – Ugly bug ball. – Is this someone they play with? – (Link and crew laugh) It’s not like an app game website. It’s a dating website. It’s not an actual ball though. It’s like the ball. Cinderella’s going to the ball. Where’s the bug part come in? – Maybe. – I’m confused. – Dating for the aesthetically average. – I definitely feel like a website like – this should exist. – That makes you a jerk. No. No. I’m just saying that, like,– No. I’m saying that this is the kind of thing that seems logical to exist. Not like I’m judging it. – Okay. Okay. – I’m just saying, – it seems logical – Does that make it real? that people are like, “I’m not interested in making myself look good and I’m not making you look good as my partner. – Hm. – Let’s get together. Let’s go to the ugly bug ball.” True. – It is true. – (ding sound) – Hey! – There was a Disney movie in 1963 called Summer Magic. They had a song about ugly bugs going – to a ball together and dance, – A b-b-ball? and that’s where it comes from. So yeah. – It’s real. Good work. – Okay SuperCarDating.com is the site where millionaire high-performance car owners find their fine-living companion, i.e. a career-driven individual without a high performance car. ‘Cause you don’t need two. There’s somebody who has a super car looking for somebody without a super car? Yeah who’s still career-driven. SuperCarDating.com. – This is so specific. – (crew laughing) – It has to be fake. – Is that your answer? – Fake. – Nope, it’s real, dude. – (buzzer sound) – “Our aim is to make millionaire dating to social networking more efficient for those that enjoy the super car lifestyle.” – Bad name. – You both can’t have super cars? – I mean, I added that. – Well you threw me off! Nope. I didn’t. That’s what they say. If you have a super car and want to date someone who doesn’t have one. That is what they said. Oh, okay. So you can ride with other passengers. Alright, it all comes down to this, Rhett. Whether you get to make the – big announcement or I get to make it. – Okay. If you get this one right you get to make the announcement. YouComeToMe.com. We are the only dating website for agoraphobics and the people who love them. If you’re looking to branch out without leaving your house, this is the website for you. ‘Cause they ain’t gonna leave. YouComeToMe.com. – (crew laughs) – But someone has to leave. You leave. I stay here. I’m agoraphobic. – But you love agoraphobic. – Nope. Nope. – Agoraphobics and people who love them. – You’re saying agoraphobic who – wants a relationship. – Yep. – You come to me. – Right. – (crew laughs) – ‘Cause two agoraphobics. – That’ll never work. – No. Well they could both stay inside together. – Once the person– – How are they gonna get together? They initially– They go to YouComeToMe.com ’cause it’s a real website– Not– I’m just kidding. And they come to you and then you turn into an agoraphobic and – you both stay agoraphobic. – So he makes his date agoraphobic? I’m making no sense, but I’m gonna tell you right now. You made that up. That’s fake. – I did make it up. – (ding sound) – Hey! – Alright. – Woo! Woo! Woo! – But maybe that site needs to exist too, but congratulations, Rhett! You get to barely, – by the skin of your teeth, – Oh. and the hair on your back, just won the right to give the mythical beasts the major announcement. Let ’em have it! – Okay. I’m ready! – Take the glory! I don’t know why I did that with my collar but I just wanted to look more official. I am very happy and excited to announce the launch of the all-new RhettAndLink.com! – What?! – (Rhett) Designed using and powered by Squarespace! (laughs) Go check out the website. You know what? Okay. We’ve had a website for a while. Actually had it before our YouTube channel, but now we’ve got a website that, when somebody says, “Who are Rhett and Link? Who are these guys? Rhett and Fink? – Left and right?” – “What is Rhett and Link?” You can actually tell them to go to RhettAndLink.com and it will serve as a cleanified portal to send them to all the things on the internet that you can enjoy – from us. – (Link) You can scroll right. You can scroll down. You can click. – (Rhett) You can go left as well. – (Link) Oh yeah. Left! And you can be taken magically to all the places where our content lives and breathes and hooks people up for dating, – because now we have a dating site too! – (laughs) Well, yeah. – Just kidding! – Maybe later we’ll add that. So, yeah. Check out RhettAndLink.com on your phone, on your laptop, on your tablet. Thanks to Squarespace for helping hook us up with that awesome looking thing– And friends. And thanks to you for liking and commenting and subscribing. – You know what time it is. – Hello. I am the troll who lives in the enchanted forest up in the north of Sweden, and it’s time to spin the – Wheel of Mythicality. – You can get the Rhett and Link bobble heads at RhettAndLink.com/store, and remember, – the box itself becomes – (in unison) the set! – Look at that! – Woo! – This is it fully assembled. – Shirts, hats, hoodies, mugs! All types of stuff at our store. Click through to Good Mythical More. I’ve got a couple of more stuff to talk about. Freeze frame! ♪ (sentimental music) ♪ [Captioned By Hayleigh: GMM Captioning Team]

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