my son was recently attacked by a squirrel and I feel partially responsible I’m Judy from Russia let’s talk about it good mythical morning today’s episode is brought to you by kurtulus the guys with the goods including the big bubble widemouth that’s for those of you who prefer to drink out of a mason jar but sometimes you’d like to do it in a sophisticated manner and this one is stemware that’s nice link should drink out of that daily I will had a bit of a tragedy recently my son my eight-year-old son Locke was uh I want to say viciously attacked because it sounds more sensational but he was attacked by a squirrel viciously let’s just say it in an episode I don’t know an episode previous episode of good mythical morning we talked about the fact that there was a squirrel that came in your house and ate a sandwich and then your wife called 9-1-1 yeah it’s all very confusing but it’s the same squirrel the same squirrel the authority showed up but they couldn’t track down the squirrel and now it’s reappeared do you thought he didn’t show up we-we-we squelched the hope you were there you you’ve heard the story they didn’t show up you’re just playing along as if you don’t know the facts yeah playing a good co-host yeah so what so he gets bit viciously or just attack he was actually with your kids he was with I don’t blame don’t bring my kids into this well I don’t know I wasn’t there I didn’t witness the entire thing but Lily and Lincoln were also there okay and apparently Locke calls the squirrel squirrel II that’s what he calls the squirrel and he was petting squirrely because the squirrel has gotten very friendly and he now goes and pets the squirrel so you go from being afraid and calling 9-1-1 to naming it and petting it i didn’t go anywhere my son did okay so he be saying you’re old he does these things i don’t have any control over him so he he pets squirrely often or was this the first time he has pet him as it petted he has petted him several times and this is the one time the squirrel II turned on it me saying he gret like hold out your finger he said he actually grabbed it and bit down on it he really he grabbed hold of it with both paws and bit down on it he so he thought it was another peanut butter sandwich taught you know I think that squirrely thought he was being fed or something or maybe there’s something maybe there’s something maybe there’s something in me I really think that you’re gonna bite my finger I could uh but don’t but then I call nine-one-one so I first did you hear a scream where were you I was in a kitchen okay see you were close by and you weren’t making a peanut butter sandwich no it wasn’t and so I Locke and the kids weren’t in and they’re all laughing first of all they’re all laughing like dad squirrely bit me he like he knows it he’s like this is impressive he’s not my uh squirrely baby daddy he comes in and he’s excited about this he just he wasn’t still dangling on his finger was he no the squirrel had released okay squirrel a bit it was a bite and release to call it and squirrel kingdom and he released and then I look at it and I’m like and of course Jessie’s freaking out she’s not calling 911 but she is freaking out a little bit he was thinking about it because she’s worried about infection and all this kind of thing but I look at it and it’s it’s not that serious of a thing I mean the the front teeth came down just above the fingernails so kind of hip bone didn’t go in very deep and then it kind of just broke the skin a little bit on the underside so it was really like an experimental but it was like is that food no it’s not food and back him backed away but you said that you think that you might be partially to blame well but uh if you’ve been a fan of whispering the squirrel eating hey bite my son I did not encourage it but if you’ve been a fan of ours for a while you know that cone has ago we made a song called the squirrel write song in which I made some cruel noises like this very convincing if you don’t have squirrels in your neck of the woods then trust me this is exactly what squirrels sound like that’s exactly what they look like so so by I’m pretty good at this as you could tell it’s one of my many talents but it’s what the one I am the best at is making squirrel noises and I actually communicate with squirrels sometimes in fact squirrely whenever I go outside him do that he looks at me and I know you’re trying to tell me something but I don’t know the language well enough yet actually communicate real truths to him mm-hmm but I do get him to respond a little bit so you think you had told him well without knowing three right years sorry years Locke has tried to make the squirrel noises and he cuz I used to do this joke where I’ll be driving along in the car and I would act like there was a squirrel in my lap and he was in the backseat in his car seat and he couldn’t see and I’d be like here he just keeps on my lap and he would be like dad there’s a squirrel and so I had him convinced there was a squirrel on my lap while I drove and he couldn’t see it and then it would get out when I got out of the car you’re proud of that and then he’s like dad how do you make those noises I said well I was bitten by a squirrel as a child ah so oh so that’s why he was so excited he thought it’s kind of like Spider Man getting bit by the by the radioactive spider yeah he thought that yes finally I’ve gotten squirrely to bite me he’s gonna have the ability and he actually told me yesterday he was like dad he’s like comes out and he’s like he’s like me it’s kind of is sort of making the sort of a week he’s I’m getting better at it now ever since squirrely bit me I’m I’m getting better at it huh now did you take any photos of the squirrel biting your son you said you weren’t there I did not I’m you taking me the opportunity taking photos of the aftermath no I was not concerned at all I didn’t need to take anything to send to a doctor anything like that okay it’s Annie and you didn’t take him to the doctor no I did not take him to the doctor you determined that everything was okay yeah it was it was a flesh wound okay now the ironic thing I asked about the pictures because I don’t know if you guys have seen this in the news recently there was a 60 year old woman who celebrated her birthday by going to a safari park in South Africa so I’m gonna celebrate my sixth he went with her husband and she was attacked by some cheetahs yeah now these cheetahs were they said that they were they were friendly cheetahs you can pose for a photo with him yeah and then an eight year old girl was bitten in the leg by one of the cheetahs and the woman goes over after she posed in her pictures and she goes and helps her and then I was sudden the cheetah start attacking her and there’s pictures all over the Internet of this I don’t know if you’ve seen any of them and the pictures worked all taken by her husband three she was attacked for three minutes until and mortgage I mean work it she was just he was just fo toggling the whole thing yeah of course and he’s quoted as saying something like I didn’t realize I was taking photos I was just panicking so much yeah which is just really fishy took three minutes the the authorities show up or the Rangers or whatever and they beat the Cheetahs off with sticks and she’s okay she’s gonna recover so don’t worry but she used to dump the husband but yeah yeah what’s it that’s his defense I was you know I didn’t realize I was still taking photos well I would I know I would have done that if I probably would have gotten one good photo when the squirrel was had attacked and then he released I would have checked on it but yeah I tweeted this out over the the past weekend mm-hmm said the squirrel that came in my house and ate a sandwich has not bitten my son and my mom instantly texts me it says you’re joking about that my mom follows my tweets by the way that’s cuz she doesn’t follow you I’ve tried to get her to follow you really yeah and she said you were joking about that right I was like no it happened and then after I tweeted that thank you for those of you who follow me on Twitter and then replied in in in great numbers about what I should do first of all there was a lot of people said you need to get him checked out whoa get him checked out you know meaning the squirrel well the son okay the squirrel also just in case he had rabies they were like call animal control see if the squirrel has rabies then get your son checked out take them to the doctor they might need to do antibiotics and all this stuff has let you know I’m from North Carolina he’s gonna be okay trust me I mean if it was like a rabid raccoon or something like that they’re like not him on the knee for a couple of minutes we may have taken him to the doctor now I’ve seen squirrely he doesn’t look healthy there anything he has a little bit of mange and that’s how I know it’s the same squirrel because on his not so bushy-tailed all is beginning to kind of like a rat’s tail oh gosh he’s lost a lot of hair it might just be getting old it looks it looks like a dandelion that half of the half of the white part of the dandelions that already been blown off into the wind like just take that down a tail of a squirrel and that’s what his tail looks like but many of you also said kill the squirrel immediately I mean many people said kill the squirrel and I was reading the tweets out loud to my wife you know and lot was listening and I was reading all these these tweets about killing grow and I looked over and Locke’s eyes are welling up with tears and he’s like daddy don’t kill squirrels he doesn’t friend is he you think it was his fault and I just provoked I was like first of all I’m not a prime not gonna kill this girl because probably I know it was Robbie wasn’t aggressively attacking you you were petting it let’s just not pet squirrel any morning won’t bite you and it was your fault but then it crossed my mind you you your fault if I wanted to kill squirrely hmm and I wanted to do it on my own could I even do it in the city of Los Angeles and I did a little research cuz you really wanted to know and it turns out you cannot you cannot discharge any firearm in a BB gun or pellet gun is it’s considered a firearm hmm and in the city of Los Angeles I could have felt good about it good about that prosecuted for trying to kill squirrely which is you can miss squirrel and you can hit me if you’re standing right behind him we I could be I’m not gonna miss him if I’ve I’ve shot mini squirrels which reminds me I know that you people who have a problem with hunting are gonna hate me for this but you know I’m ready for that I grew up in North Carolina where if you’re a little boy you have a BB gun and you kill little animals with a BB gun I mean it’s just a part of the culture mm-hmm and what it reminded me of actually when you buy the BB guns they just have you know rows and rows of them in like the Walmarts back home they have photos of dead little animals all over them just look what you can accomplish if you purchased one of these things now I don’t do this anymore I don’t hunt anymore I don’t really have any plans to continue hunting but and my kids don’t hunt we’re not gonna family of hunters and we’re not going to carry on the hunting tradition but it just reminded me how different my kids childhood already is I mean I would shoot squirrels from and birds and rabbits from my bedroom window I poked a hole in the screen in my bedroom window and I would sit up there like a sniper killing little animals would you go down there and get them and yeah and then my I would sometimes confess my mom into cooking them seriously yes my brother killed a rabbit one time and we ate the thing for dinner what’d it taste like rabbit and that’s not gonna happen and that’s it if my kid was had a BB gun out the screen of his bedroom window we would get by we get prosecuted instantaneously they were the the helicopters when the LAPD would be showing up at my house and arresting my son and me and maybe that maybe that’s a good thing I don’t know it’s just a different thing let’s just leave it it okay it’s different things are different but yeah he needs to feed him from a distance I think that’s really the encouraging that bond would squirrely from a distance you know what I’m saying just like hello squirrely that’s just poor leave it up there that’s a portable squirrel by the way I can’t do it uncomfortable close-up how are we going to do this this is when we were going to pop in on a close-up of each of us kind of in my personal space all of a sudden I haven’t had my gum this morning but you know maybe this could work maybe we should start doing the show like this this would be uncomfortable I’m uncomfortably close to you the audience member and i’m uncomfortably close to you link my nose look bigger than it should you know the camera adds 10 pounds to a nose can we just end this as quickly as possible yeah so you and your family filming us with your flip cam shaking our little tail some crackers from your hand we know we’re irresistible