( rooster crows ) ( lion roars ) Welcome to “Good Mythical More,” the wheel is landing, I’m sorry I forgot to spin you. – Oh, gosh. – Are you gon’ pick that up? QTMBA, “Question That Must Be Answered,” it simply must. “Would you rather smell yourself…” – Yes. – Whoa, no, hold on. – “Would you rather smell good to yourself, – I do that all the time. but not others, or the way around– other way around?” – Ooh. – Oh, gosh, you know what I mean. – Would you rather smell good to yourself? – You smell good, everybody smells bad, or everybody smells bad and you smell good? No, that’s not the question, the question is… Meaning that you smell bad to yourself and good to others. So, um… I’d rather smell bad to myself and good to others because I’m all about external. The external is the most important thing in life. ( laughter ) Why don’t you answer the question for yourself? It’s not an easy answer, is it? No, it’s a question that must be answered, so I’ll tell ya that, QTMBA! Now, what are we saying, and was there a hashtag for that? Come on in, Tess. Was there a hashtag for that? I don’t know, possibly. Put that on a T-shirt. – Okay. – Hello, Tess. Hi. We’ve asked Tess to come in here and bring some homemade La Croixs. Now, did you work in partnership with La Croix? I didn’t, no, I would’ve liked to. ‘Cause we’d have to like, put something on the bottom of the screen if you said that you did and we didn’t. Hold my horse, because, look that way, – Giddy up. – what happened here? A little La Croix? Yes, I did, I did, I put a little unicorn sneeze on my head. “Unicorn sneeze.” – Did you do that? – No, I had it done by a professional. Is it after your favorite flavor? It’s not, I’m not that cool. – Okay, well, hey, I mean… – Wish I was. So, that’s not permanent, because you– it’s just dye. It’s dye, I mean, it’s permanent dye. But dye washes out over time. Yes, that’s true, that is correct. Well, I guess that’s a stupid question. Otherwise I’d have to dye the follicle like in my brain. Just tell me that’s a stupid question, you didn’t bleach it first and then dye it. I did, because in order for the color to show up, – Right, so obvious. – they have to bleach it, it’s a good question. But hold on, but it will be there until it grows out. It will. That’s what you’re talking about. Yeah, I thought it would fade. Every time I take a shower, it looks like I cut my hand. So, it’s not a stupid question, because she could’ve done color, temporary. – There’s temporary color – Temporary. – and there’s permanent hair color. – Permanent hair dye. Yes, it’s permanent, it is permanent. But just like when you draw Sharpies on Mike and Alex, I mean, it’s permanent, but it’s not permanent, right? – Yeah. – Right, what do we have here? Okay, so the one on the left is eggnog and rum, and spiced rum. How did you do this? It’s just flavoring. Where do you get these flavors, Amazon? In the depths of the internet, Amazon fails you when you have to come up – Really? – with stuff like that, yeah, ’cause they have like kind of more generic stuff. You can grab a straw. My hands smell like Cheese Whiz. That’s Easy Cheese, man, don’t get it wrong. Yeah, that one’s a good one. – What’d you say? Eggnog and rum? – Eggnog and rum, yeah. “Eggnoggin” rum? Golly, tastes like medicine to me. I like both of those things. Are you a eggnogger? You like it? Tess: Do I have to taste? You don’t like eggnog? I don’t hate eggnog. How can you not, like, have a love affair with it? – Remember that time that… – Exactly! – Like, especially whiskey – ’cause I wanna just… – and some rocks, ice? – I wanna stuff it in my mouth until it comes out my ears, man. – Hold on, Tess. – Oh, thank God. I wanna bathe in that stuff. It’s so early in our relationship for you to totally take his side. I’m sorry, it was just that once. I had a life-changing moment with eggnog. Did it make you sick one time? No, positive. Remember, we… ( mocking ) “No, positive.” Was it the puke experience? Remember, we were hanging out with our friend Julian Smith, I think we’ve told this story, and then it was around this time of year, – We started talking about eggnog, – it was about four years ago. he’s like “I got the best eggnog, I’m gonna go get it right now,” and he leaves to go get it ’cause it’s from a farm, but it’s at the grocery store, he didn’t go to the farm. You know the special chocolate milk at the grocery store that’s in a glass bottle? Oh, gosh, well, those people make eggnog too. It changes lives, I bet. It changed my life, ’cause it was so thick, with two c’s, and I had to get more. – That’s a thick eggnog. – Tess: T-H-I-C-C-K. Now, that sucked, let’s try something else. Okay, that’s… It wasn’t you, it was just the flavor. I mean, yeah, it was not very good. Eggnog flavor is difficult to get unless it’s eggnog. That’s strong, I’m just gonna let you know. This one is peppermint, and it’s real peppermint, with a capital P. – Oh. – ( chuckles ) Something that we’ve done today has given me a headache, like I’ve got a splitting headache right now. – Here, have some peppermint. – I’m sorry. And I think it’s that I’m smelling my cheese hand. Peppermint does wonders for headaches, it really is. Is it all the peppermint, or is it the cheese? No, peppermint helps with headaches, – I’m not making this up, – Really? Peppermint helps with all kinds of things. Also, if you drink a Coke, that’ll help, like, get rid of it. – That’s a myth. – Do they make this? ‘Cause what did you say about this? – It was a little shocking to me at first, – It’s great. To me, it tastes like somebody left mouthwash out. – Oh, you just ruined it for me. – Tess: Yeah, it’s really strong. ( laughter ) I should just start drinking mouthwash. It tastes like somebody rinsed out with mouthwash and then spit it back into that cup. A peppermint eggnog, actually, could be pretty good, the peppermint eggnog. That’s a good idea. What about this one? – This one is a gingerbread. – Ooh. Is there someone in your family who, like, makes an eggnog recipe that’s just like so strong you can’t really handle it? – You talking about liquor? – Yeah. Lemme tell you about my momma, – I’ve told you about this before. – We’re teetotalers. – Oh. – My mom, as she’s gotten older, she was always about convenience when it came– now first of all, she will cook a mean Christmas dinner, a mean Thanksgiving dinner, like she does it from scratch in a lot of ways. But, if she can find a little shortcut into something, make something a little bit more convenient, like if a turkey dinner came completely packaged and you could just, like, unzip it, she would get that. So, she will get the eggnog, but she ain’t gonna make no eggnog. When you can go to the grocery store and get it from the farm in the glass bottle, she’s like, “Why am I gonna do that?” That’s a very good point, that’s a solid point, I feel the same way about macaroni and cheese. Other than the fact that you’re, like, a chef and you cook a lot of things. Scoot on up, you’re so far back. – Okay, I’m sorry, I don’t… – This smells good. You got cassette tapes all over your legs. I know, these are really cool, ( bleep ) changes lives. – Yes, you can’t negotiate your own sponsorship. – Come on, you can’t do a plug. – I’m sorry. – ( laughter ) I’m sorry. – Are you skimming? – No! Do we get a cut of that? Yeah, we’re gonna bleep that out, and they’re gonna think you cursed. – Oh, no, did I? – ( bleep ) Call us. What did you say this was? Gingerbread. This one’s the best one, but I gotta say, I just feel like sticking with the fruit flavors and the carbonated water is the way to go. This is not the best one. It is the best one of those. It’s like drinking a clear, liquid cookie, man. – Exactly, what’s wrong with that? – The best things about cookie is that they’re not clear, and that they’re not liquid, and I didn’t know that until right now, thank you, Tess. What about the molten center of a melting cookie? What’s great about you guys is, like, I’ve never seen so much of a visceral reaction when you taste something, like you really think about, you know… my family does not do that. We’re gonna be the next Food Network star. Oh, great, just together? – Yep. – Just one? You know, we judged that once. – You did? – We did, we judged that. Yeah, we were really harsh. I kept saying, every time they cut to me – I was just like “I think it tastes good,” – Everybody grab their favorite. and it was like I supposed to say what I thought about everybody’s meal, but I was like, “It’s all good to me, man.” Cheers, happy holidays, good work, Tess, thank you for hanging around with us, – and being your mythical what? – I’m gonna set this over here.