(rooster crows) (lion roars) – Welcome to Good Mythical More. We like the world of crazy products, if you can’t already tell. So let’s explore more of those, in patent form, even though we’re not daddies. – But first we’re going to play – [Both] Daddy Like, Daddy Don’t Like. – Daddy like patents. – Daddy don’t like ping pong. – Daddy, hold on, I don’t have to repeat you, right? – You just have to say something you like. I have to say something I don’t like. It’s a really stupid game, but we’re not good at it. – Daddy like eyeliner. – Daddy don’t like honey mustard. – Daddy like mustard. – You can’t do that! The rule is you can’t take part of what the other guy didn’t like or like. – That’s not the only rule. The main role is you can’t say the same thing. – You can think of something that makes you think it, but it can’t be honey mustard and then, mustard. You lose. You can’t do that. You violated the only rule man. – That’s true man. – Daddy like mustard. – I mean, honey mustard and mustard are two different things. – But honey mustard has mustard in it, just also honey. – No, it just has the word in it. – Honey mustard is just mustard with honey mixed into it. – Oh, we got a lot to talk about. (woman laughing) – I’m right, right? – Stevie, give us a patent, and then we’ll tell you if we’re lying. How’s that for an idea? – [Stevie] If you’re lying, I don’t think that’s going to work. – Well, then we’ll do it where your lying. – Look, honey mustard is just that, honey and mustard blended together. Were you joking with me? – Look at the brain cells you’ve wasted. Mission accomplished. That’s how thinking works, right? It’s like a burning process. – Oh, that explains your philosophy. – Right, I’m conserving thought. Someday, I’m going to need to actually think. – Yeah, he’s saving all his thoughts for late in life. (loud laugh) – That’s not funny. It’s true. – [Stevie] Okay, there are some weird patents, and you’re going to guess if we made these up, or if they’re true. Like, for instance, in 2004, a patent was filed for a urinal headrest so that standing users could place their heads against the wall while using the commode. Real or fake? – Not the commode, the urinal? – [Stevie] Well, what is a commode if not a urinal? – I think a commode is a regular toilet. – Of course, he also thinks honey mustard and mustard – Yeah. I don’t think a commode. – the same thing. – [Stevie] I mean, it could be a headrest for the commode, and you just have to lean on it. – This is a good idea. – This feels like it was real because people do that. I mean, the worst I’ve ever done, maybe if I was really tired, is put my arm up on the wall and then put my head on my arm. – And by tired, do you mean drunk? – Very, very tired. I’m not drunk, I’m just sick. – [Stevie] Hm, a commode is a piece of furniture containing a concealed chamber pot. So it’s not even a synonym for a toilet. – So an old toilet, back in the day when they would just literally have a pot in a chair. – [Stevie] Yeah, this is real. – Yes! And there’s the diagram to prove it. – [Rhett] Hold on what happened to this guy’s legs? (quiet laughter) – [Link] The ankles and feet are not part of the patent. – [Rhett] He’s got his pants pulled up. He’s too far from the urinal. – [Link] All it has to do is get the idea across so if somebody else does it, you can say, but, this is my idea. I’m the genius who wanted to put a pillow above every public urinal. I would only do this in private settings. – Why are there so many parts though? – [Stevie] Yeah, what’s the line coming out of the urinal and behind the urinal? – I don’t know why they’re specifying. I think they have to specify, like something about the urinal as part of the patent, but I can’t understand why. – [Stevie] Is that what you do with your other hand? – Yeah, I usually hold it back like that. (people laughing) That’s me when I’m peeing. [Crew Member] If your good, you can do both hands. It’s so people can give me candy at the movie theater. I’m just like, y’all got leftover candy. I don’t want to miss out on an opportunity. Put a Whopper in there. – Put a Whopper in there. – [Stevie] I wouldn’t say put a Whopper in there. – I’m taking a leak. Put a Whopper in there. – Put a ding dong in there. They got ding dongs in the front. – I mean, where’s his left arm? There’s a lot of mystery in this. – Give me an extra hot dog. – That’s a good start. That’s stupid though. – [Stevie] A 1999 Patent was filed for a wearable pet display, a vest with clear passageways for your pet rodent to explore while you wear it and even retrieval pockets for you to access your pet. – So you wear a vest that your rat is navigating? – Yeah, like a maze shirt, which again, I think this is a fun idea. Cause you you want to bring your gerbil or your hamster out into the world. If you really love your pet, you want them to be part of your out-of-home experience. – And people who have like rats as a pet, for instance, – Rat would work with this. – They liked to have them like on their shoulder. Oh, this is easy in my pocket. I think somebody was like, man, he’s in my pocket right now. – It’s a contained system. – What if he could get into my other pocket, on his own? – And I would look cool while he did it. – And maybe even be massaged. I mean, it just happened. – Again, it doesn’t have to exist. It just has to be patented. The bar is pretty low. Real invention almost turned the wrong way. – [Stevie] Yeah, it’s real. – Yeah, let’s look at that diagram. – [Link] Okay, you got a happy child. – [Stevie] What is going on in the groin and butt region? – [Rhett] He didn’t have to have on shorts that tight. The choices that are being made, we didn’t have to go there. – [Link] Hm. – [Rhett] But this is basically like those tubes that you put into a rat cage already, you know, like the plastic tubing. – [Link] Yeah. – [Rhett] How many rats do you think you could fit in that vest? – [Link] Well, I see at least two mice scurrying around his back right now. – [Rhett] If you went to like a convention, depending on what kind of convention, many different conventions, and you were the guy that had that, and you can see the rat in the clear tubes. – That would be cool until you tripped and fell at the convention and smushed your rats. It’s like you got all that blood spatter in the tubes, and you’re like having to explain to people what happened as you’re finding the nearest exit. – Well then it just becomes cosplay. I’m cosplaying a guy that had a rat in his vest and then killed it. It’s not real. – And how are you going to get that thing out, you know? – I think you just throw away the vest if that happens. – [Stevie] I feel like this. We could combine the urinal headrest with this, and the guys and you could put a rat in your hand in the back. – [Rhett] Hm. – [Stevie] Yeah. – [Rhett] This is the kind of guy that I would accept a rat behind my back from. – [Stevie] Yeah. – [Link] I thought you were saying you could put, put a maze of tubes on a urinal, and then you could like. – [Stevie] Oh, watch your pee go through a thing. – Would you let a rat watch you pee? – Oh yeah, oh yeah. I’d kinda like it, but you’d pee on, the rat would have to like, I don’t know, if there’s a game to it. We’re two for two though. Give us another. – [Stevie] In 2011, a patent was filed for a sunscreen pill, a capsule containing a non-toxic SPF solution that would enter your bloodstream and give you UV protection. – I don’t know if the patent was filed in 2011, but I know unequivocally that this is something that people are working on. – He knows. – I read an article about the oral sunscreen. – I get, I mean, I like the idea. I don’t want to be slathering. I hate slathering up, or spraying down. – A writer may have just invented something that does exist. So we might need to check the internet on this one, because I’m saying that it’s real. – [Stevie] That. – Oh, I’m saying it’s real cause I heard Rhett talking about it. – [Stevie] Might be the case. – That might be the case. Can we search that? – You were lying. – [Stevie] Yeah, there’s research now. The 2011 patent, and I don’t believe it has SPF in the pill, but yes. – It does something to you. – Is there a patent or no? – No patent. – [Stevie] There’s not a 2011 patent about this SPF pill, – But we’re still going to take it as a win. – What’s the latest guys? – [Crew Member] Well, we can show it to you. – Yeah. – All right, we’re getting the absolute latest on the SPF pill. You heard it here first folks. – They’re also trying to come out with a pill. – As you’re doing that. I’m going to talk about the products that we have invented. – Yeah, do that. – I mean, here play the musical comb because you’re good at that. – We got beard balm. We’ve got clay pomade that I use in my hair. We have got Mythical Hand Lotion, which I have on and smells great. – Here we go. – We’ve got a comb here. (comb dings) – Oh, wrong. – We’ve got some beard oil. (comb dings) – I haven’t done it in awhile. – Lip balm, Candy Milk and Peculiarly Perfect Peanut Butter Peppermint, which makes everyone who tries it happy. Get it at amazon.com. All of our products are natural. They’re cruelty-free, and they make you look good. – So y’all sent us to a website. – Leave a review on Amazon if you like this stuff. That helps us out. mythical.com and amazon.com/mythical – So this is a heliocare antioxidant supplement that has 235 reviews, and it’s five stars on Lovely Skin. Strengthens immune system, enhances UV protection, and gradually builds UV tolerance. – UV tolerance. – So this isn’t what I was talking about, I don’t think, but maybe it is. Cause I didn’t like I didn’t dig very deep. Sunscreen pills or fake medic medicine FDA says. No pill can protect you from sun. – It says NBC news so. – I don’t trust NBC or the FDA so that doesn’t mean anything to me. – This is 2018. There’s no such thing as a sunscreen pill the FDA said Tuesday of 2018. – [Stevie] Tuesday of 2018? (crew laughing) – Hey, this was not shared to me in a Facebook post by Daryl so I do not trust it. Okay. I do my own research about this. Screw y’all. – I’m taking the pill. – [Stevie] The fish bidet was a 2007 invention that directed a current into your fish tank strong enough to clip any extra fish poop off your fish, but gentle enough not to scare your pet. – Hold on. – [Stevie] You know all of that extra poop. – I had a Beta for a while. – And poop sticks to their. – They put a plug of poop out, and it grows and grows and grows. And sometimes it’ll be like, you know. – Like a cigarette ash or something? Like it doesn’t ash off completely? – Just like that, yep. You never had fish, huh? – Well, we had, remember when we had the beta, when we moved to the studio, and it was called Professor? We called him Professor. And we took Professor home, and he died. I don’t remember him ever having a poop. – And, he died. – Anyway, he didn’t die immediately. We enjoyed him until he died, but they do that, you know, they die. – Yeah, yeah, yeah. They actually live for quite a long time if you take good care of them, but it’s cool. – We did. – Yeah, I’m sure you did. – But he still died. – I’m sure you did. I’m sure you took great care of him. – Anyway, I don’t remember any poop, not ashing off of his backside. – I just don’t think that this would work. – It’s so strange. I don’t think it could be made up. I’m saying this is a real invention. – No, I think it’s somebody’s who has a – Electric current to shake poop off of a fish. – [Stevie] I didn’t say it was an electric current. – No, it was just like a jet of water that’s in this fish tank. – Oh, why did I think it was electric for some reason? – [Stevie] No, no, no, that would not work. – Based on that, it feels like you’re saying it’s real. – This is stupid. – I’ve already said it’s fake. – This is fake. – [Stevie] That’s fake. – Oh. – Apparently someone on the writing team has a beta poop problem. – They got a fish with with some poop problems. – [Stevie] A 2006 invention, to make glasses wearing easier, require the wearer to pierce the bridge of their nose and thread a barbell beneath the skin. Frameless lenses would then clip onto the piercing. – This is a great idea. – Uh, how? (crew laughing) I know what it is. – How’s it a great idea? – Yeah. – It feels like some fifth element stuff, man. – Starts with a piercing? – It’s just like you have a little piercing, and then you just do (click) the lenses? – You just do that. – I mean I wouldn’t do it necessarily. – I mean, what is this piercing called because that already exists? It’s not a libret, that’s here. – What is it called? – Does it have a name? Do you guys know? – Bridge, nose bridges. – Nose bridge piercing. I don’t know what it’s called. – [Stevie] An erl. – An erl? – [Stevie] Bridge piercing is also called an erl. – E R L, horizontal bar across the bridge of the nose. I mean, if you have one, I guess, it could help with keeping your glasses up. – But then when somebody’s like, hey take your glasses off, man. We’re in a place that we don’t need glasses. – [Link] Oh gosh. – That would be horrible. – [Link] Boy, they’re showing us pictures. – I think it’s real. – I don’t like it. – I think it’s real. – I think it’s fake. – Fifth element stuff, man. – [Stevie] Real. – Okay. Let’s see that patent. Oh my gosh, look at that. – [Rhett] Yeah, see? – [Link] I’m modeled for this. That’s me. – [Rhett] Doesn’t it look like somebody from the future? – [Link] Yeah, but it seems a bit, it’s quite an investment. – [Rhett] And then, what if they start going like this? – Physical investment. – They start turning, you know what I mean? Like how do you keep them? – [Stevie] Well, it’s also like, what problem are you trying to solve? – The ear things. – Oh the ears are a problem, and then this falling down is a problem. – I think this would be popular with athletes. – Until they get it ripped off along with like all of the skin on the bridge of their nose. – Yeah, that is a problem. I think he disrupts your complete nose off. – Good gosh. – [Stevie] How about this accessory? In 1991, a patent was filed for a life expectancy watch, which claimed to use health and genetic factors to determine how much time you had left to live. The display showed how many years, months, days, minutes, and seconds you had left. – What year? – [Stevie] 1991. – I mean it’s just not the type of thing that you want to be constantly reminded of. You might want to know once, but you don’t want to be reminded every time. – You don’t want it to be a watch. Maybe just like a clock in the house, in a room that you don’t go on very often. – But saying it’s stupid doesn’t mean it’s not patented. – I’ve got 20 years left, (beep)? – Right, yeah. – [Stevie] It’s real. – What! – It’s a real patent, you know? Oh, there it is. They just sketched a watch. I mean, but how does that really work? – [Rhett] Well, there was no biometric stuff in 1991. – [Link] Time remaining. Boy, what a downer. (crew laughing) – How much time you think you got left? – I’m taking it one day at a time, man. – [Stevie] Well, you have one round left. – I’d like to think I’m halfway there, 86. – If you had to, this is a weird philosophical question. If I asked you how much time you had left and if you were wrong, I would kill you. How would that work? – Why are you doing this? (hysterical laughing) – I’m just trying to think if that somehow became a paradox. I think it became a paradoxical question. It’s like something that would happen and like David Bowie would ask you that in Labyrinth. – Oh. – (in deep voice) How much time do you have left? If you answer incorrectly, I will kill you. What do you say? – I would say as long as I can get David. – I think you have to be right. Because if you say I have no time left and you’re wrong and then he kills you, you’re actually right. And so that’s what you have to say. You have to say I have no time left because then he can’t kill you. That’s it. If that ever happens, if David Bowie ever asked you how much time do you have left on this earth? And if you answer incorrectly, I will kill you. You say I have no time left, and he will let you go. (upbeat music) Ziggy Stardust that! – [Link] Unleash your legendary style with our line of mythical grooming and personal care products. Available now at mythical.com.