Welcome to Good Mythical More. Shout out to Trinidad and Tobago, and you, wherever you’re watching. Could be from anywhere, Rhett. People are everywhere– Everywhere. Anybody with the internet can watch this. watching this. And you know what we’re gonna do with them, we’re gonna do with this opportunity? What? We’re gonna bring in crew members. Oh, we are? And we’re gonna get them to tell us their biggest regret. Wow. We’re gonna try to not only match it to them, but but make it even worse, probably, through ridicule. Oh. Yeah. Now I’m excited to be here. Yeah. But first, let’s play Who You Talkin’ About. We read a comment that somebody left, and we guess if it’s about him or him. See, you can ridicule us too. Donna– in the comments. Kitterson says, “the way blank talks to the corn, it’s obvious he’s a great dad.” Well, it’s talking to food. If you talk to your kids the way that you talk to food, you’d be a great dad. I’m not saying you’re not a great dad. That’s a good point. But I was kind of implying it. Good point. I’m saying Rhett. Okay, I’ll go with me too. I don’t even remember corn. Come on, corn. Hold on. Corn’s still thinking about it. Corn’s still thinking about it. Go, corn. Go on, corn. Get outta here. Get outta here, Corn. Don’t embarrass me like this. Yeah. Finish. Finish the race. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Encourage it. You obviously lost. Yeah. But we don’t give up. We give up twice. Seems like a great dad. I’ll let you take that one. I’ll let you take that one. Let’s bring in the crew. Oh man. Sometimes I believe that a great dad is only as good as a greater mom. Ah. I kind of fall back on that. Welcome, Chase. Welcome, Aubrey. Stay together parents. Welcome, Jessie. Do it for the kids. And welcome, Taylor, to the show. Taylor, you are hidden behind me, and I cannot move further over because I can’t not be in my show. Now. We’re not gonna say anything about– Come on up. Come on up. we’re not gonna say anything about the fact– Smush up. Smush! that both Aubrey– You can do it! and Jessie are wearing overalls. We’re not gonna say– Nothing about it anything about that. That’s not the kind of thing that we would point out. And then just beat it to the ground like a dead horse. Y’all could be farmers. No. Yeah, we’re not gonna make jokes about– Sisters. Hee Haw, or anything. No. No Hee Haw jokes, Link. No Hee Haw jokes. All of my jokes are Hee Haw jokes. I know. What am I gonna do? Here’s our first story. I’ll give you a couple here. We’ll go back and forth. “I always had swim practice after my weekly piano lessons. So if my mom,” these are the biggest regrets. Okay? Biggest regrets. Huge. “So if my mom was running late I’d change for practice in her bathroom.” Okay. All right. “When I was around 10 years old, I finished my lesson, and my mom wasn’t running late, but I always got so nervous I’d be late for practice. So I figured I’d save time, and change. My 10 year old self barged into that bathroom, only to be face-to-face with her husband.” I think you missed a… you said her bathroom. It’s the teacher’s bathroom. So it sounded like you were saying– Well, I know. Mom. It does not– My biggest regret is letting Rhett read this. Okay. You take it. See where it says teacher. Read it word-for-word, just like I did. “I always had swim practice after my weekly piano lessons. So if my mom was running late, I’d change for practice in my teacher’s bathroom.” No, you just added teachers. “When I was around–” You added teachers. It says her bathroom. “When I was around 10 years old I finished my lesson, and my mom wasn’t running late, but I always got so nervous I’d be late for practice. So I figured I’d save time, and change. My 10 year old self barged in that bathroom.” My teacher’s bathroom. Yep. “Only to be face-to-face with her husband, who was in his seventies, and taking a poop. He looked at me and said, ‘Oopsies.’” Oh, we got David. “‘Oopsies.’ Before I closed the door and went to wait outside in the driveway, pretending my mom was already there.” Yeah. Yeah. That sucks. That sucks. A 70 year old piano pooper. Your husband of a piano pooper. This is tough. Husband of a piano pooper. I saw my teacher’s husband pooping. So this is someone who can play piano, and swim. And change clothes. And change clothes. I can do one of those. So– At least You can swim. Yeah. Let me see your hands, guys, hold your hands up. Do you have piano hands? Are you looking for webs? What are you looking for? Oh, the old webbed hand. Piano– Clearly a swimmer. Piano playing muscles. Piano hands. Piano hands. I don’t think you can play piano. It’s tough to play piano with those nails. Yeah, it’s a lot. Jessie, I think you’ve got piano playing hands. Taylor, yours are kind of, you know, I’m not gonna say they’re stumpy, but, you know, you might be more of a ukulele. I’ll put them down. You might be more like– More of a ukulele. Ukulele fingers. Thank you. Oh, gosh. If I’ve ever seen any. A lute, maybe? Yeah. All right. Well, how’d you sleep last night? Me? Yeah. Great. See, don’t you feel better now? I slept well last night. Right. Focus on that. Yep. Wasn’t up playing the piano. Give that one to Jessie. I think that’s a good guess. Yeah. She got the piano playing hands. Now listen, I’ve had my kids’ friends walk in on me pooping before What? And you just… Did you give them a whoopsie? Oopsie. You’re saying like multiple times? It happened one notable time, and I was on my phone, and the thing that came out of my mouth when she opened the door was– Something that wasn’t– I’m on GrubHub. That’s literally what I said. You’re an idiot, man. It’s the first app you can think of when you were in bathroom? No, I– I’m on Grubhub. It’s the Grub one. The Grubhub. Just so you know. This is Grubhub. Don’t get any ideas. Grubhub, not the other hub. Right. But I was on Grubhub. What? What hub? That’s why I said it. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. When was this? Like, how long ago was this? About a year ago. Oh, God. I’m on GrubHub? And then she went to, I guess Lily, and was like, “your dad’s in the bathroom on Grubhub.” It’s like I– Yeah. Did she say something like, “okay. Bye.” Like, what? You say the dumbest stuff. She just closed the door. Yeah, that’s right. That’s a good choice. It did come up in conversation about a year later. She’s now Lily’s friend and her– I’m on Grubhub. So this is like a– college attendee. Honestly, Pat. It’s not a 10-year-old. It was like a 18-year-old. Yeah, this is a college age woman. Yeah. Well, yeah. She was like 17. What happened the other times? Didn’t you say it happened multiple times? I don’t think it’s ever happened again. And I’m gonna– Did you say anything else? She shut the door. It wasn’t like we stood there and had a conversation. No. Like after, were you like, “I’m sorry that you walked in on me pooping.” I actually never said anything about it until a year later, when– But here, put your order in. Do you want extra fries? We gotta finish this damn order. Was this one of your biggest regrets? No, I didn’t do anything wrong. He’s Grubhubbin’. No regrets. Do you want read mine or? I’ll read this one. Okay. Let’s see if I can get it. I mean, I’m gonna tell you, it was wrong, what you did on that last one. “When I was in college I went to the premiere of Shane Dawson’s film, Not Cool.” Is that the regret? Shane Dawson’s Not Cool? “Where there were a lot of celebrities, and YouTubers in attendance. I ended up talking with Shane, and his friend Drew Monson, one of my favorite YouTubers at the time. Afterwards, I chatted with them long enough that they gave me one of their plus one passes to the after-party, at a bar down the road, and I turned it down because I had plans the next morning. I’ve regretted it ever since.” That was the regret. I could have changed everything, y’all. You could have been a plus one to an after-party for Not Cool. Now Taylor, we’re, you know, we’re fans of similar things. Yeah. Like we have similar music tastes. We’ve connected over John Mayer fandoms. We have. Well, it’s just one fandom. We’re both in it, I guess. Saw him on Raya. Oh. Oh, really? Didn’t match, though. You didn’t match? Well, actually, I don’t know, ’cause I had canceled my membership after that. He’s just on there– John Mayer, if you’re out there– dating people match me back. That’s your biggest regret? John Mayer, you said? John Mayer’s on Raya? Or someone pretending to be him. How do you tell? There’s a picture of John Mayer. I guess you meet him, right? Yeah. I would had to have met him. Did match with the guy who played Spencer Shay, though, on iCarly. Didn’t meet up with him, though. Oh. Okay. Wow. Okay. Wow. Sorry to divert this. Well, tell us about someone you did meet up with. I’m interested in this. No one interesting. No one interesting? Sadly, no. I’m thinking this is Taylor. Okay. Shane Dawson. Because you’re a really big fan of that movie. You know. And then I think, when it comes to YouTubers, you would be a Shane Dawson fan. But I don’t know, it could have been Aubrey. “In college, I indulged in alcohol a bit more than I indulged in knowing my limits.” Oh. Okay. “On one occasion, I was at a party, and this guy who had a problem with me said he wanted to start fresh. So we started drinking Jager together. He got me so drunk that the next thing I knew, I woke up alone in the elevator of the science building on campus. And another time I drank so many Dublin Drops on my friend’s roof on St. Patty’s, that I passed out on a toilet at 5:30 PM.” Two regrets for the price of one. Wow. So this person went to a college with a science building. Science building. Science building. Jager. Elevator. St. Patty’s. Dublin Drops. Why are you making that face? I don’t know. I feel like we just made eye contact, and I was like, “Oh no.” I thought, I don’t know, I thought– Yeah, Aubrey had a little bit of a guilty look. there was a question coming for me. Yeah, I know. I could tell I did and I was like– My eyes were going this way. The moment I looked, you were already making the face. This is you. Yeah. I feel pretty strongly about that one, Aubrey. I feel like Aubrey’s done worse than just pass out. The old Dublin Drops. Thank you for that. You guys can hash that out when you’re pitching hay bales later. “One time I was on a game show whose hosts were notoriously punny. They even had a segment of the show dedicated to a pun-off between them. I had a series of puns planned out in my head during the first episode. I was using an awl. A-W-L. Awl. Awl. Awl. I don’t know. Awl. Awl. “And the host asked me, ‘what is that?’ And instead of saying, ‘this is my awl time favorite tool,’ or, ‘it’s the greatest tool of awl,’ all I could think of in the moment was, ‘this is an awl.’” So this person actually was a contestant on the show? Yeah, yeah, yeah. See, I feel like this could be Aubrey. I feel like this could be Jessie though, because– I don’t know about Jessie’s performance past. I mean Jessie builds things. She uses awls all the time. But why would she be on a game show? I don’t know, man. She’s on Raya. You don’t know. True. You can’t pin her down, man. All right. Well, we know that– I think Chase could have seen a 70-year-old poop. Right. Right. Oopsies. I’ve seen many things in my time, yeah. We know he can swim. I can swim. So are we right? Should you have punned? And this is an awl. Yeah. Oh, that is an awl. Yeah. Right. See? It’s for poking holes in stuff. Yeah. Back during my art department time– Right. I just called that the poker. Yeah. Yeah. See? Now what game show was this? It’s called Making It. It’s more of like a Great British Bake Off style– Oh. like reality competition show. Oh, did you win? No spoilers. You have to watch all of the episodes, and find out. I’m sure Lando’s watched some of that. Oh, okay. Okay. No, I didn’t. This is an awl. This is an awl. Taylor. Yes. Okay. Yes. Good job, man. So you got to know Shane Dawson. Well, yeah. It could have been more. Well, I was there because the premiere was in Pittsburgh, which makes it cooler ’cause it wasn’t an LA thing. So that was cool to go there, but I skipped it to go to the worst class that I ever took in college instead. Which was? City-University Life, which is Pittsburgh College speak for, “We teach the hillbillies how to live in a city.” Wow. City-University Life. I’m not lying. As a credit? As a credit. 8:00 AM. 8:00 AM, every Thursday. Oh. Wow. Wait, what did you learn? Yeah. When you close the door, then you can just hit plus 30 seconds, and you don’t have to worry about any of the other buttons. Yeah. Right. Yeah. That’s a microwave, you’re talking about. Not an elevator. I know there’s a lot of buttons, but just for plus 30 seconds. And then, if you want it to be more than that, just keep pushing. Why is the city teacher talking like– Pittsburgh. Yeah. talking like that? It’s the Pittsburgh accent. He’s speaking their language. If the door is ajar, it won’t work. Yeah. Yeah. Microwave. Yep. Microwave lessons. That’s what they taught. Well, the teacher never showed up. I think I had like one class where the teacher showed up, and it was supposed to be a field trip. We didn’t go. And then that teacher got fired like a year later for yelling at somebody for stepping on her plant. I don’t know. Well. There was a lot going on. Lots to unpack, there. You made it out. That’s all that matters. I made it out. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And you’re here now, you’re safe. Yeah. And my story is just not going . In the city. In the city. I’m in a bigger city, arguably, than Pittsburgh. You can use a microwave like the best of them. You’re thriving. Okay. Aubrey, are we right about the Dublin? Mm-mm. Oh, Chase. Oh, dang. How embarrassing. Okay, let’s go to Chase. Man. Jumped the gun here a little bit. You gotta know your limits, man. I do now. You do now? Thank you very much. Thank you very much. Yeah. You didn’t have to put both of them down there. I was instructed that it would be funnier if I put both– It was. of them on there. It was. What’s it like to come-to in an elevator? So it was the first day right before the semester started. We all showed up, and that was when the party was. And then I woke up in the elevator, and there were these two college students, these two girls, who were both getting some early studying in, and they just opened the door, and I heard the ding, and I woke up, and I just saw them. They both had books in their hands. I was like, oh. What day is it? It’s just a little– Wow, man. late night studying. I wonder how many floors you traversed while sleeping. How many people saw you, “oh, there he is again.” Up and down, up and down. That guy’s still on the elevator. I have this like gut feeling that I got in the elevator, and I just didn’t push a button. And I was like, this is taking forever. I’m gonna sit down and take a nap. Yeah. I feel like that’s probably what happened. Yeah. It’s like, we’ll get there eventually. I’d like to– You thought it was a space elevator. I’d like for you to tell my kids these cautionary tales. Yeah. I’ll happily– As a warning. Okay. That could be a class. do little speech. Well, Aubrey, that leaves you and your scarring story. Yeah. I’m the pooper. Can you still close your eyes and see it? Yes. I was literally telling Jessie earlier, I can still see his face saying, “oopsies.” I literally will never get over it. But I will say, I do think I wanna use Grubhubbin’ now, as a code word for pooping. I’m like, “oh, I gotta go Grubhubbin’.” Or if you’re using one of the mythical bathrooms, and somebody knocks on the door. “Grubhubbin’!” Yeah. “Grubhubbin’.” “Grubhubbin’” One moment. Oh my gosh. Now that this is over, go check out our podcasts. There’s more stuff to listen to over there. Brand new Dispatches From Myrtle Beach. Best Friends Back, Alright!. What are the other ones? Ear Biscuits. Oh yeah, we did Sextember on Ear Biscuits. Good Mythical Crew podcast. That’s right. Yeah. Grubhub. Hotdog Is A Sandwich. Hotdog Is A Sandwich. Trevor Talks Too Much. Good Mythical Crew podcast. Link, you should ask your dad if anyone’s ever walked in on him pooping. I bet he has a long list. He’s probably got a catchphrase or two about that. Yeah. I’m sure he says similar things that you could never in a million years predict. Well, he said that he had pooped in a field a dozen times. Oh, you’re talking about my dad. I missed one thing there. Yeah. Yeah. He missed the part about his dad. Which dad we were talking about. Well, my dad, yes. My dad has pooped outside a dozen times. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I’ll ask him. I’ll ask him. I know who you’re speaking of, and I’ll ask him. Yep. Be sure to check out our entire slate of mythical podcasts, including brand new seasons of Dispatches from Myrtle Beach, and Best Friends Back, Alright! And all of the live episodes we recorded at MythiCon.