Welcome to Good Mythical More. We’ve got some non-beef beef jerky here. Non-beef beef jerky. And we’re gonna see which is the baddest, which is the most rippable. Which is the toughest. Toughest. Toughest. This is not amusing. Ah. Tomato jerky. But you like sun dried tomatoes, so maybe you’ll like it. Maybe, maybe I’ll like that. First, let’s tell a 10 word story. Why don’t you start it, Neal? Climate. Ah, Rhett, come on, man. Change. Needs. More. Patience. Because. At. Because what? At. Because at? Yeah. Do you understand how English works? Climate change needs more patience because at– Most. It’s. Real. Right! Hey, that’s– Climate change needs more patience because at most, it’s real. So, again, I mean, every once in a while I feel like I need to check back in with you about climate change– Climate change needs more patience because– About 10 word stories. At least– So typically a story is about something that happened at a certain place and time to someone or something, right? Yeah. But it’s 10 words. But not a statement. If you wanna change it to 10 word statement– I do. I would be happy ’cause you always, anytime I give you the opportunity to start it, you start it with a word that can only then make a statement but not a story. All right, fine. Once. Climate. You’re supposed to say upon. Yeah. How does it feel? Once climate murdered… Bobby. Yes! And. Tina. Celebrated. A little misdirection there. Because. Bobby. Why didn’t you say at? Is this it? Died. Once climate murdered Bobby and Tina celebrated because Bobby died. Hey! Hey, see, there’s a story. And you see how much better it can be? Yeah, it was, it was much better. Something happened. Which one you want try first? KG? We’re gonna go with the salmon jerky first because no one–this is tuna. I read salmon, but I’m seeing tuna. Happens all the time. Kaimana jerky, handcrafted Hawaiian tuna jerky. Kaimana? It’s perverted. It’s peppered! I thought that said preferred. We gotta pervert it. Preferred. Pull it back! It’s one of them perverted ones. We can’t let that thing on the boat. Last time, it got outta hand real quick. Stevie! Oh, god. Here it is. Okay, here we go. There’s lemon sauce. So this is– There’s peppered, which we have. Original teriyaki, honey glazed, and Hawaiian warrior. It’s all about how your jerky teeth work on it. You made a tuna jerky that’s flavored like a Hawaiian warrior? I just don’t know about this. You know, I’m a big, well, I’m gonna say seafood fan. And the idea of a jerky, like something that you had to like, kind of soak in your mouth a little bit and then pull at and then smell, that’s fish flavored? I just don’t know. Oh, Link? No. What? It’s tough. It’s also, like, you have to eat this in private. Why? I would never eat this in on the internet. Well, no, I’m saying like, isn’t there a fishy smell that only intensifies as the jerky gets wet with your–ew! Yes. It’s not as bad as you’re making it out to be by spitting it out. But– It’s not bad. It’s actually kind of sweet. They made it kind of sweet to, like, offset the fishiness. It’s not as fishiness, fishy as it could be. I prefer it, it is preferred. But– I prefer the perverted. I really feel like it really got hold of my jerky teeth. But it did, it fell apart in the other direction if that makes sense. It was, it didn’t have a lot of sheer strength. It had a tinsel strength, but not sheer strength. So we’re not…you’re fine with the taste. I’m with you, Stevie. You’re right. The more this is in your mouth, the more it just turns into like a putrid fish. Yeah. Eat your fish in private. But if– Maybe for like, a hiking excursion, you know, like you need that protein, you need something that’s gonna keep. But a solo hike. Yeah! Yeah. 9 grams of protein. There’s no more protein in this than in the vegan stuff that we’ve tried. I think I’m really onto this vegan jerky. You’re onto it. I like it. Something about like the sinewy, like, fibers of muscle was really brought to the fore with jerky. Mm. And I don’t like that. I’m a vegan jerky man. I’m a vegan jerky guy. Oh, you’re saying that real meat is too visceral for you. Why don’t you just make, why don’t you just become vegetarian? Why don’t you just go all the way? Why are you holding on to meat? I like meat except when it’s, I don’t like meat jerkies. Okay. All right. Now when they ordered this one, they told us they didn’t realize that it was a dog treat. Yeah. They thought that was a person on the front. It is a very human-like dog. You know, it’s got a presence about it. Alaskan salmon, chicken, soy. So it’s partially vegan. Is that dog winking? That dog has only got one eye coming out. Yeah. The dog is winking. Hmm. Let’s see if there’s a story about this one-eyed dog. Nope. Nope. Now, it’s gotta be tough, you know, ’cause the dogs, they need the tough stuff. Sean loves to chew things up in a way that Barbara does, like Barbara grew out of the chewing things phase. And I guess, Sean is, I mean, he’s like two and a half years old, but he’s still chewing on things. So we recently ordered him a box of what was advertised to be highly chewable treats. Treats that a power chewer can’t decimate. Okay. But, we didn’t do a good job of sizing these things, because at least one of the chew toys is the same size as Sean. Like this? How do you got a chew toy this big? Because it’s for like a really big dog. He’s nine pounds. Does he gnaw on it? It’s a fish that is like this big and I think it’s just hard plastic, like it– Oh, wow. No, he doesn’t chew on it. He was like, this is obviously not for me. So it didn’t work. That’s not chewy at all. That’s not tough at all. They’re soft. That’s not great. Dogs got bad taste, man. Salmon, let me tell you a story about salmon. Dogs don’t know what’s up when it comes to food. Don’t ever trust a dog– Ow! To make a decision about what you’re gonna eat. Let me tell you a story about salmon. I love a good salmon story. Christy told me, she was like, I was out with some of my girlfriends and I got a call from my dad. My dad, he texts me a lot, but he never calls me, she says. So I felt like I needed to answer it, even though I was with my girlfriends. So she answers the phone and Bobby says I need to ask you something. And she said, well, I’m here with my friends. But he was like, well, I don’t want you to tell your friends. Just text it to me then. And she said, well that means I’m definitely gonna tell my friends, dad. And he was like, all right, well, he’s like we’re at the Outback. Okay. As per usual. And I want to order the “sal-mon”. Yup. Now they’ve been to Outback a lot. They go to Outback all the time. Back when we were in North Carolina, y’all want to drive up? We can meet halfway, where y’all wanna go? Outback. It’s a good choice. Every time. Good choice. Apparently he’s never had the “sal-mon”. Yup. Right. He’s like, I want to try the “sal-mon”. Yup. And Christy knew exactly what he was getting at because she was like, well dad, you need to follow through with this. This is a good idea for you, but you don’t need to tell ’em how to cook it. And you don’t, you just need to let ’em bring it to you the way they wanna bring it to you. And listen, it’s gonna be pink, because it’s salmon and that’s how you say it, dad. Yup, right. But they’ll know if you say “sal-mon”. Salmon. They’ll know you’re talking about it. And she said, if you fork into it in the middle, it might be even more pink. And that’s fine. I just want you to eat it. I don’t want you to say anything to anybody about it. I just want you to eat it. Yeah. He was like, all right, I’m gonna try. And then that was the end of the conversation. And then, you know, like an hour later he calls back, and he was like, I did it. Ate the “sal-mon”. And I, it was pretty good. It was quite good. It was pretty good. Was it pink? It was pink. Yeah. And he just kinda went with it. Just went with it. “Sal-mon”. What was the main question though? What was he, was he inquiring about how to say it or how it should be cooked? He was not inquiring, he was inquiring if– He should go through with it. If he should go through it. If he should do it. Yeah. If he should do it and if so, how? He’s like, I’m thinking about this but I’m gonna have to call my daughter in order to go through with it. Right. This stuff wasn’t good, Stevie. Don’t give it to Ringo. Okay. Ringo doesn’t like fish. What kind of treats…for our dogs, we cut up turkey dogs into little pieces and that’s what we give them as like training treats. That’s what we do as well. Did we have the same person come to the house for an initial evaluation for training? No, I think our wives talked to each other. Well because that’s what, the only reason we do it is because we had somebody come to the house to try to make Sean do things and– Bring somebody in who makes Sean do things! She had little hot dog, little pieces of hot dog. High value treats is what they call them. Well, I give Sean a little high value treat every time he decides that he will use the bathroom outside, which is, you know, not common. Oh yeah. I give both of my dogs a treat every time they come in from using the bathroom. Do you have to do that for Ringo? Yeah. He has– Just to reinforce? Yeah, it’s like– You did it in the right place. That was great, yeah. This is just one piece. Now Barbara– This is venison jerky, y’all. Here’s the thing about Barb is that– It’s the original. She has picked up on this. We got this new guy here, and…here you can take the big one ’cause this is the only place I could rip it. We got this new guy here, and he seems to get rewarded for doing really simple things. So what Barbara does is, Barbara just goes outside and looks at me and then acts like she’s peeing. Even if she doesn’t have to. She kind of goes down, does a thing, looks at me, and then comes up to me. She’s like, I know that’s what you want. This is all a big game. And then do you give her a treat? Nope. Ooh. Oh, you don’t? Holding out. I don’t, I say nope. I know you’re a little trickster. That’s what I call her. I say, you little trickster. You can’t fool daddy and I do not give her a treat. This has got a low… Oh god. Maybe I’ll call it a high rip-ability quotient. I mean, it’s really hard to rip it. It tastes good. It’s very tough. Kinda makes me rethink my whole vegan jerky decision. This is so much better, man. But yeah, you can look at it and tell that this was like pulling on bones and tendons and making a deer run through the woods. Do you know what I’m saying? Yeah. Okay. It was muscle. I think you make a good point. If you’re gonna go with plant-based alternatives– Don’t ever. And you are a meat liker– Don’t you ever go back! A meat lover. Well, I just think there needs to be a separation between the two and you shouldn’t compare ’em because it is gonna be really tough to switch. I mean this is what, talk about Bobby. He doesn’t hunt, but there’s lots…he used to. Lots of people in the community that’ll bring by venison. Oh, this is elk. I got the wrong one. Was this always elk? No. ‘Cause you had it right here, bro. Oh, there it is. I found it. You’re kinda like a dog. When you turn it away from ’em and face it down, they don’t know it’s there anymore. So he sends us a lot of venison jerky. It’s good stuff. You eat it? Yeah. Less and less. Yeah. Elk. Let’s compare it to the elk. Elk should be what? How should it be different? I think it should be leaner. Oh, it’s softer. Or is this just a soft elk? It doesn’t say anything about a soft elk. It just says elk. Featuring soft elk. Now featuring soft elk. This… tastes no different. It rips a little easier. It’s easier to rip. Must be the soft elk. It might just be in my mind, it tastes a little gamier, but it also has less seasoning than the venison one. Oh, we’ve got buffalo too. It has the exact…and then we got buffalo here. Let’s try the buffalo. These people are finding all kinds of things. These people at Jerky.com. Jerky.com. Jerky.com. Did they get in early or did they pay a lot of money for that website? That’s a great question. Jerky.com. Here we go. Oh, man. You getting worn out? Yeah, I just feel like I’ve been jerked around a little bit. You hitting a wall? You hitting the jerky wall? The jerky wall. Do you know, Link, a lot of people think– Oh! A lot of people think that the world is a globe, is a sphere. But I happen to know that it is a flat disc. And when you go to it’s furthest reaches, you reach the jerky wall. The jerky wall? Yeah. If you follow a lot of flat earthers, they’ve got that right. They’ve got that the earth is flat. They’ve got that part figured out. The part they don’t have figured out is it’s not an ice wall, it’s a jerky wall. And I have just hit it. High protein in that wall. I think the buffalo is the best. When you die, where do you go? The jerky wall. Hope it’s made a buffalo jerky. Hmm. See the thing when I bite it it’s like, there’s like muscle fibers and it looks like, I mean it just looks so fibrous. It’s disturbing, you know. Going back to vegan. A lot of people getting gored at Yellowstone lately. That’s cool. Don’t get gored. Hey listen, don’t get– By what, an elk? The bison. Don’t get too close to the bison, man. They’ll gore you. It’s not all fun and games just ’cause it’s a national park. Wow. You heard about mythical– Seems like you could survive that. I don’t think they’re dead. Gored. I think they just have a real bad weekend. Mythical Society. It’s the place to be and it’s our members only community with all kinds of special content and offerings. And we have just developed a new Society app. The new app has a bunch of new features that everybody was asking for, including the ability to cast the video that you’re watching to the nearest screen that will accept it. Oh yeah. Can you download it on Apple or Android? You can, it’s available for everybody. You do not have to be a paying member of the Mythical Society to download it. And you can also, if you’re just interested in checking things out and being like, well what is this all about? You can be an Initiate, which is a free member of the Mythical Society. Yeah. Check it out. MythicalSociety.com. Plant-based tomato jerky. Bison have injured more people in Yellowstone than any other animal. And they can run three times faster than humans. And this article says the last woman that was gored was 71 years old. Well ’cause she was slow. They go for the slow one. That woman is a threat! They go for the slow ones. But she’s fine. I mean, it says she sustained non-life threatening injuries. She’s probably not fine. Well, yeah, I mean, I can follow up on her. Well, that would be sad though, in the end, if she’s not. This is wonderful. You know, Tipper’s been gored a lot. Yeah. Yeah. It looks like a sun dried tomato. Speaking of climate change, Tipper’s been gored. Tipper Gore, she was the one that put the explicit lyrics on the rap, didn’t she? No. She put parental advisory. The rappers put the explicit lyrics on the rap. She came up with the parental advisory. You would’ve thought that was Quayle, but it was Gore. Who was Quayle’s wife? Sam? Sam Quayle? Remember the good old days when you like misspelled tomato potato and it like ruined your whole political career? That’s all it took. The good old days. Like, one scream like WOOOO! That ruined your whole career with Howard. Howard, what’s his last name? Howard Dean. Dan Quayle misspelling potato ruin his career. Man, these days you can do quite a bit more. Maybe you should run for president. You get away with anything. Yeah. You can do whatever the hell you want. Now I’m gonna tell y’all, you’re right Rhett, I do like sun dried tomatoes. That’s basically what this is. It’s basically great. It’s better tasting than all the beef jerky. Teriyaki and cracked pepper. 6 grams of protein, 6 grams of fiber. Bold flavor– I feel like I need a third opinion. Can you– Malachi’s still here? Can you take one of these back to Stevie? I think she’ll appreciate that. Well, you just gave her all of them. Tell me that’s not great. It’s like a sun dried tomato that’s fully dried and very peppery. Is that not good? Am I deceiving myself? Oh God, it’s really– It’s strong. Really strong! Yeah. Like texture wise, but it’s delicious. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I mean, I would totally take this camping. The irony. Link Neal. Yeah! Packing something tomato. The biggest word on this is tomato. Now either Stevie took quite a few or somebody else has got–oh, I see ’em. Okay, I see all those mouths moving back there. It’s good, isn’t it? That’s really good. What company is that? Yeah, I was just looking at that. It’s got a lot of pepper on it, but I like pepper. There’s no…where’s the top? Where’s the…did I throw it away, KG? Oh, thank you. Bella Sun Luci. Bella Sun Luci. My grandfather, my step-grandfather, Pop. He put so much pepper on everything that I thought something was wrong with him. I didn’t realize he was just an old man. Yeah, yeah. I was like, is he, is his doctor telling him to do that? You know what, I’m gonna tell Bobby to do this. He likes to grow ‘tomaters’. Make some tomato jerky. Tomato jerky. That’d make a great holiday gift. Oh yeah. This is a good idea. This is gonna give him something to do for the rest of the year. I thought you were gonna say the rest of his life. Well, maybe. I mean, hey listen. If he keeps eating that “sal-mon”. Maybe he’ll have a few extra years. I’m definitely gonna tell him about this. This will give us something to talk about. Yeah, and that’s what you need. You need to find something to talk to your father-in-law about. You do. And for me it’s gonna be like jerkifying tomatoes. Yup. All right. So this is number one. In taste. In terms of discovery. But in terms of gripability, I think the venison is the strongest. But we do have wild boar. Let’s wrap it up with some boar. It’s been a long More. We’ve gone a little too long. A lot of people get the boar problem is a real problem. The wild pigs, man? Wild pigs, they’re really outta control guys. Right. You can eat these things and then– Boy, that’s tasty. Not bad at all. Pretty soft though. It’s got fat in it, which makes it soft. If those tissues break down– Yeah. See, tissues. That’s what I wanna be talking about. All right. We know what the real story is today. Let me take a picture so I can text it to him. And the most, the toughest is the venison jerky, in case you’re wondering. If you’re gonna, like, make gloves or something out of it. Actually gonna put a few on here so you can get the consistency. All right. Send that right along. Download the new free Mythical Society app for iPhone and Android now.