Welcome to Good Mythical More. Sodas are taking the secret lives of Mormon wives by storm. And, uh, now we are gonna try some of their go to, what do they call them? Soda drinks? Soda drinks, I don’t know. Dirty sodas. Dirty sodas. Dirty sodas. But first we’re gonna tell a ten word story. Okay. Sodas, it’s on theme. And I’m gonna keep it ten this time. Spoil. Their. Secrets. When. Mormons. Choose. To. Bring. Sodas spoil their secrets when Mormons choose to bring. Why, why did you do this to me? To give you the, to give you the punchline. Uh, um, God? What? Yes! Yes! When Mormons choose to bring God. When Mormons bring God. Right, right. On their two year mission, they bring God to everyone. God knows everything. God won’t spoil your secret if you bring Him into it. Okay, so, Stevie, can you So to spoil their secret is when Mormons choose to bring God. Stevie, explain this phenomenon to us. So, this is interesting, because I always thought, so one of the things that the Word of Wisdom text says is that you, that Mormons should avoid hot drinks, which were further defined by the church leaders to mean both coffee and tea, excluding herbal teas. Okay, can I interrupt you for one moment? Uh huh. When you said Word of Wisdom texts, the first thing that I thought was that you were subscribing to a Words of Wisdom subscription. Like an email thing. And they were texting you little Words of Wisdom. And I was like, that’s why she always says smart things. Like a newsletter. Yeah. Because she’s looking at her texts. No. It’s a Mormon book. But you’re talking about a scripture. Yeah, yeah. And also, there was an update that the church released that states drinks with names that include cafe or caffe spelled differently, mocha, latte, espresso, or anything ending in chino are coffee and are against the word of wisdom. So I thought it was, So it’s not caffeine as much as it is hot drinks and those specifics. Chino, anything with a Chino. But you can wear chinos. Yes, yeah. In fact, you are encouraged to. Anything that ends in Chino. Is that it? So, uh, hence, uh, Swig was founded in Utah in 2010 and they are the creators of the Dirty Soda. And this is a drive thru. Yeah, and they’re on every corner, uh, in, uh, in Utah. It’s their Starbucks? Yeah. So, uh, we have specific, uh, drinks that are faves of the, uh, women on the Secret Lives of Mormon Wives, and this is, um, Demi? Demi. This is Demi’s? This is Demi’s. Oh, I didn’t know she became a Mormon. Let’s take a look at her TikTok. 44 ounce sparkling water with sugar free coconut, sugar free vanilla, sugar free raspberry, sugar free pineapple. Oh God! No! Chef’s kiss. Uh, uh. This is going to taste like crap. No you didn’t, Demi. There’s no way this is going to be good, right? Uh, no. You know what this reminds me of? Water tok. It’s the same thing. Yeah, yeah, the Venn diagram of water tok and Mormon soda tok. To clarify, these are Swig made these official drinks based on these women from the show. So these are like, on their official menu now, but named after the women on the show, based on what they like. No, no, no, no, no, sorry. No, no, so sorry. No, no, no. You said that wrong? These are just the drinks they happened to order. Yes. And Swig made the TikToks. But are these their names, or the names of the drinks? These are just their names. Right, but you can call it the Demi if you want, or the Demi, depending on what part of the country you’re from. Can you call it the, the, the, You really sent us on a goose chase. All you had to do was say, this is the drink this girl likes. Now, I set my bar so low Demi. that I think I stepped right over it. You are demeanted. Your taste buds are demeanted. No, listen, you’re not listening. I thought it was gonna be so bad. I hate it. I thought it was gonna be the way that you feel right now, and then I drank it. And I I don’t know. I’m not gonna move to Utah, but It’s very artificial, dude. Yeah, I don’t care. And coconut. The coconut is actually not as bad as I thought it would be, and all those flavors ended up mixing in a way that me and Demi really, like, okay, all right. I just, oh, gosh. The frequency of consumption is concerning to me. One every day, at least. That is, that’s like a piña colada every day, you know? But it’s all sugar free. And if you weren’t drinking chino’s, What are you drinking? You gotta put something in your mouth. True. Every culture has to put something in their mouth. Yeah. Right. Name a culture who doesn’t put something in their mouth. I can’t Rhett, because every culture likes to put things in their mouth. And if you tell, and if one culture’s god, gets very detailed about the things that you can put in your mouth. Yep, yep. and then you believe that that’s how god works, um, then you gotta go to somewhere else. And there’s a god somewhere on the other side of the world who’s telling people not to drink this. Yep. And they’re listening to their god, too. Don’t drink the artificial sweeteners. And then those gods get together and compare notes. Or the sweeteners. Hey, what are you prohibiting these days? Well, listen to this. Gather around, guys. If it’s hot, they can’t have it. . That’s a lot. That’s a lot of things though. No. And, and and what about, what about herbal tea though? Well, well, I don’t gimme some time to think about that. But also chinos good to wear, bad to drink. Oh, but that is simple. Anything. So we could say anything ending in chino, that’s what you don’t want? If it ends in chino, and if it has a, if it has a cafe, cafe. It’s spelled which way? I don’t even care. Both ways? All bad. Two Fs, one F, thing over the E, no thing over the E. If you’re at a cafe, just don’t go to cafes. Oh gosh. It would be awesome to be a god, cause you get to make up stuff like that. Yeah, and you know what, I just want to see people in my land swigging. I just want, I just want my people to be swiggy. You’re the Swig God, which sounds like a rapper. Swig God. Did you see? Link got a picture with Swig God. It’s on Reddit. Yeah, yeah, yeah, I did. Now, depending on the sugar free situation You know, it could, it could very well, um, take the place of coffee in terms of, Exactly. Mm hmm. Because people have coffees every day. What is this? And they’re going straight to hell because of it. No, no, I mean in terms of the, the overconsumption of certain sugar alcohols that we’ve explored. Oh, hold on, is that happening in this? I don’t, that’s what I’m, that’s what I’m saying. That’s what I’m inferring, like is that, Also, you don’t want the artificial sweeteners. They say that they’re not that bad, but they probably are. They gotta be. All right, what is this? This is Big L. a drink that Layla likes. Let’s take a look. Layla. Layla got some sunglasses. Mango puree, strawberry puree. Oh, she’s going sweet. Coconut cream. Okay, so this is more, this is more piña colada. The thing that disturbs me is the coagulation of the cream. Like, I don’t like that. You don’t like coagulated cream? Mm mm. I don’t like it. But that’s Swig God’s best album. Coagulated cream? That’s a good name. No, that’s good, though. This is so much better. Mango juice, strawberry juice, lots of sugar. No artificialities. And then you got the little bit of cream on top. That’s real sugar? Mm hmm. Yep. She does not care. You wouldn’t want to do that every day, Layla. Layla! I bet Layla does that every day, but I bet she doesn’t eat much. Well, she also jazzercises, probably. Um, this one tastes, You’re gonna jazzercise for a while. This one tastes so much better, but like, the sugar calories in here. What you, what is happening? What is happening, Layla? You got me on my knees. That’s the song. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Swig God. Swig God sampled it. Okay, so taste wise, Layla has something over Demi. Oh, definitely. In Link’s world. Oh, oh, you’re, you’re, you’re, This is just horrible, dude. It is better. For the artificialness alone. Okay, I think that you’re going to like Jesse’s more. I do not have a TikTok for Jesse’s. This one is ugly. A uh, 32 ounce Dr. Pepper, vanilla syrup and coconut cream. Okay. Pause. Is, is, is, is my wife doing something on the side that I didn’t know about? Uh, other people can be named Jesse, and I think one of them is, is a Mormon wife. Oh, okay. Okay. Okay. Because if my wife was a sneaky Mormon. I felt like I would need to have a TV show about us. The secret lives of a man married to a sneaky Mormon. Yeah, it’s, she keeps a secret Mormon life from you. Well, I’ll be honest with you, you don’t know about, you can’t, we couldn’t go, you can’t go in the temple. You know that. The temple is a secret. You can’t just go in, you can’t just go into it. You gotta reach, you gotta reach a certain achievement. When you get married, the, uh, the ceremony, there’s lots of secrets there. There’s secret things happening there. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So if I found out that my wife was secretly visiting the temple, I don’t know what I would do. You would need to know what she’s doing. I think you’d need to raise the roofs 37 times is what I think you’d need to do. 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 33, 34, 35 Lost count. We did it! We did it! We did it! Don’t do it! It was 37? Okay, alright. Dr. Pepper. Can they, can they raise the roof? The latter day saints? raise the roof. What was that? You were like, genuflecting. Like, what is, like, it’s too hard? Like, you’re not even, you gotta move, yeah. You’re so lazy, man. Hey, look, I’m only, hey, hey, hey! It’s in the, I’m 43! This part here goes straight up and down. Biologically speaking. The roof needs to be raised. I’m not a baby, I’m not 40. You’re not pushing the wall, you’re raising the roof. But first of all, Mormons don’t raise the roofs, the Amish do that. That’s true, that’s it. That’s it. Take a sip and tell me if I’m gonna hate it. It takes a lot of the edge off of the Dr. Pepper in a way that a Dr. Pepper lover, like me, doesn’t like. You created a drink that tastes like lake water. It’s still horrible. Dr. Pepper mixed with coconut, what is it? Uh, vanilla syrup and coconut cream. Tastes like the lake. It’s a creamy Dr. Pepper. Because, like, is it the cancel it? Is it the coconut and the vanilla that cancel each other? Something happens that takes the edge off of the Dr. Pepper. Better. I think it’s better. Right, and that’s why it’s not good. Because Dr. Pepper lover. Yeah, I hate Dr. Pepper, so. That was still really bad, but it was better than the worst I’ve had, which is just Dr. Pepper. Why did my ears start ringing when I took that sip? Okay. Are you sure that wasn’t a burning in the bosom? Mm hmm. Yes. Taylor? We know a thing or two about the Mormon scriptures. Oh. Mm hmm. Yep. You’ve got the Pearl of Great Price. Well, here’s the thing about Link. One summer, when I went away in college, I had to make friends. Two Mormon missionaries came to the door of our apartment. Friends just show up at my door. Oh, come in, guys. They came in and they spoke with Link. And then Link let them come back. Every week. All summer, every week. Every week. I was, come back. Come back next week, guys. And he would just listen. And so he’d learn many things. Yep. I didn’t get pulled into it because they didn’t lead with the dirty sodas. And then I came back from my Christian mission trip. Okay, I know Mormons are Christians, but we didn’t think so at the time. So, I came back and I’m like, What you been doing all summer? And he’s like, Well, I’ve been, I’ve made some friends. You see those two guys riding away on the bikes? Did you just say that you know that Mormons are Christians, but you didn’t think so at the time? I’m saying that as an evangelical Christian, we thought that Mormonism was a cult. And I’m just saying now that I think all of it’s kind of just BS across the board. You’ve lumped them all into the same I’m just like, well, they’re not really that different. Let’s not get too, let’s not get too, let’s not distinguish too many things here. So Mormons are Christians now to you? Yeah. Interesting. Yeah, and also Mormons will tell you that they’re Christians. Mormons are offended by being told they’re not Christians. And so I’m on the Mormon side on this one. Okay. Hmm. That’s interesting. Okay. Just want to be clear. Taylor! Is a Mormon wife. Tay tay. And she posted this on her TikTok, but it is not a SWIG official situation, because as you will see, it is Taco Bell. I’ve seen it already. It’s a Baja Blast, so let’s take a peek. Taco Bell is my comfort spot. Okay guys, I am back and I got a Baja Blast. But actually something I do is add a little bit of creamer to it. No you don’t. Add a little bit more creamer. What? Okay, there we go. That’s what I’m talking about. You put creamer in a Baja Blast? Yes! So good. A vanilla Baja Blast. Hold on. Okay, first of all, editors, were you watching? You can learn a thing or two from Taylor. That was added in post. Okay? Yeah, why? I demand! Why was that added in post? Hey, listen, if we’re gonna reach the Mormon audience, every time we sip on this show, we need to have a added. And matter of fact, you can use that one. Yep. That he just gave you. I did it. Give him one more. Oh, let me make it clean. Make it clean. [slurp noise] Use that one. For both of us. Let me get close. [slurp noise] I like the other one better, actually. That one had, like, a that had a noise from the nose and the mouth. Options. All right, here I go. Creamer. See, it coagulates. It’s not meant to be in there. We need a stirrer. You like it? I like it. [slurp noise] Not bad. It’s not bad. Baja cream. Not bad. Not bad at all. Baja Cream is Swig God’s latest single. Now, hold on. Remember, remember, I’m drinking, we forgot that it made the sound. Uh oh. Oh, you want me to do it for you now? No. The editors did it. Okay. All 20 of them. [slurp noise] See? Did you hear that? You really got that one. You did. You should get it, take it again, and just know that it’s happening. [slurp noise] Oh, yeah. Alright, God. Okay, we have a couple more, um, these are just on the Swig menu. Uh, this is the Cinnamon Cider, which is seasonal. Ginger ale, lemonade, cinnamon, apple, and cinnamon stick. Cinnamon and cinnamon stick? Mm hmm. Drink through the cinnamon stick. That’s too much cinnamon. I realized I touched, I separated the straws, I touched it, I figured I’d just do this one. Oh, drink through the cinnamon, good idea. Now the noise is gonna happen. Oh, got a leak. I didn’t. Nope. [slurp noise] Ooh, you gotta suck hard. Wow. I think, I wanna, I think this might be good. Well, they made this. That’s good. This is official menu here. Mmm. Wow. That is wild. It’s cinnamony, it’s appley. It’s gingery. You know when you put your Christmas tree in the water? And this is like sipping out of that water. It’s what you want that Christmas tree water to taste like. Yeah, if you’re gonna put a straw down in there. It’s what you imagine it tastes like. You’re gonna crawl under the tree. Get some Christmas tree water. All right, this is a good, that is the best one. Ooh! What’s that called? Cinnamon Cider. Cinnamon Cider. That’s a good one. That’s a good one. See, stay on the menu, y’all. And then this last one is Happy Camper. It’s root beer, toasted marshmallow, and half and half. They got marshmallow that, how does it, how did it get in there? Syrup. Syrup. It’s, it, it, there’s a burnt taste, there’s a burnt taste to it. It’s like burnt marshmallows. Oh, that’s good. But I don’t like root beer, so Root beer. It’s the root beer and marshmallows. This is mine over here. This is my go to. I definitely think that the ones that the company came up with are way better. I like the name Swig, too. It’s like, give me a Swig! It’s like, just a little taste. Is it just in Utah? Swig. Swig God. We’ll have to stop at one of these Swigs. I think they spilled out beyond the bounds. Okay, well, if we see a Swig, we’ll stop by, y’all. Ski Goggles, this, this, this, what did we call it? Ski Goggles the, um, Swig God. Swig God. Ski Goggles the Swig God. I can’t say it. Ski Goggles the Swig God. Mark your calendar. The last collectible pin of 2024 drops on Monday, December 16th. Plus, a special holiday surprise you won’t wanna miss.