Channel: Good Mythical More
YouTube Video ID: B8Sn6Uoy17w
Episode Post Date: January 23, 2026
Episode Number: 2965
Transcript
What should you do with that fake husband of yours? Welcome to Good Mythical More. Tell 'em Rhett. We're going to answer some voicemails because this is a thing that we used to do on Ear Biscuits. We are on an indefinite hiatus from Ear Biscuits, and we wanted to do it over here on Good Mythical More, right? So we're actually gonna take some of the questions that we got, uh, from Ear Biscuits and answer 'em here. But we are also going to a aso, arso is a new word when you combine R and also we're so going to, uh, ask you to leave voicemails at a new number. We have a new 800 number that you can call and leave voicemails. 1-833-GMMORE-1 1-833-GMMORE-1 We challenge you to leave a succinct in voicemail that. Yeah, we can't help but answer. Yeah, I, you know, if that's advice or asking for our just perspective on something that happened to you or that you're dealing with or that you wanna know and that only two people you can turn to are your internet uncles or whatever, right? I don't know. If it's fun, we'll keep doing it, but it's kind of up to you right to play along. This is only as good as your questions, not our answers. No, we're gonna do our best to help you. Let's hear the first one. Hi guys. Um, this is Chloe from Orlando, Florida. Um, I'm a lesbian and I've recently gotten into women's soccer, and when I called, of course you have, you to buy a season ticket, I told the representative that I had to, uh, think about it for some time and consult with my partner. Uh, now I don't have a partner. I just needed to buy time, but she said, okay, talk it over with your husband and I'll get back to you. And I just went along with it and now she calls me. To try and connect with me and ask about my husband, and every time I make things up, I did buy the season ticket and unfortunately, this means I'm gonna be seeing her, uh, pretty frequently and I just don't know if I can keep coming up with lies about my husband, what. Okay. This is a wow. This is a what? A tangled lesbian weave. You have woven. Uh, yeah, I think, I think we're gonna have to cut through this, you know? Yeah, we are, we're gonna have to cut through it. I mean, first of all, why did it take you this long to get to women's soccer? I thought that was like day two. Uh, okay. Right. But, uh, here's what I'll say. Wait, there's a couple of other things too. Yeah. Right. It's not that Chloe. It, it is not just the clarification that the partner is a woman. It's that you don't have a partner. The partner doesn't exist. The partner doesn't exist. It's a double lie. So you've double lied. And, and then there there's this weird thing that you, you don't, she, she called to get tickets, right? Which in and of itself is a bit strange. Typically, tickets are bought online. I know what you're about to talk about and I have an answer for you, but, and then, yep. You're buying the tickets from a person that then you think you're, what are you gonna do sitting with them? What? You're gonna be sitting next to this person? Why are you seeing the person that you bought the tickets from? I'll tell you why. At the soccer game. Because, because remember, she's a lesbian. That's why. Well, okay. No, there's a couple of reasons here. No. Do you remember many years ago, maybe 10 years ago, when the kids were, were younger, we had this idea, we were Clippers fans. Let's get Clippers season tickets so we can take Locke and Lincoln to the games, and then we'll go to a few games and then. We'll sell all the rest of the tickets because we talked to somebody and they were like, you get the season tickets, you go to a few games, you upsell the rest of 'em and you actually make money. Oh, not true. Not true. When you've got Clipper's season tickets, maybe if you've got Laker's season tickets. That was our miscalculation there, but I was the one who handled that. And you get a liaison who's a person who like calls you and like sends you emails and they're trying to develop a relationship. So you'll keep buying season tickets. Now take. NBA basketball and bring that down a little bit in terms of the number of people who are going to the games. We got soccer and so we got less people, and so I just think that the relationship between the ticket person and the season ticket holder is even stronger. Oh, there might even be a bond there. You won't even call it a bond. Oh, and. So that's that, that explains that part. So this could be a long-term relationship, especially if she finds out how much she loves women's soccer, which I'm gonna tell you right now, she's gonna love it. You will Chloe. She's gonna love it. That's gonna happen. Can I point out something else? I don't know how, I mean, this is, uh, ear biscuits on more so it don't, it's that allowed. I don't know. Yeah, yeah. You have certainly earned the Right, I mean some, someone who has the confidence to buy a. Season se season tickets for? For the only themselves. They're gonna go to all these games by themselves. I is is the implication? No, I think she's going, she's to take people, I think she's getting two season tickets, but she just wanted to get off the phone to think about it. And that was the lie that she came up with. Let me talk to my partner. Yeah. Oh well I was gonna say someone that confident doesn't need to lie about that husband. I completely agree with that. I think you have a few options here now. If this was the kind of situation in which you thought that like, in, in some ways you've like gone back into a closet that you created for yourself, right? Yeah. And so when you come out of the closet that you created for yourself, that's your business. That's, I can't tell you when to do that. Uh, I will say we're dealing with someone who sells tickets for women's soccer. So I'm assuming that there's no, like, you're not like. You know, like, oh, this is a difficult conversation kind of thing. Right. This woman is, this woman is seeing lesbians all the time and she's working for you, right? Yeah. This woman's working for lesbians as we speak. And your husband. It. Um, so I just think it's up to you. What's more fun? Is it more fun? Because a lot of times, sometimes creating a little fiction can be fun. Especially if you can just say, the first time you see this woman at one of the games, she's like, how's your, how's your husband? You're like, you've got some stories. And then you're like, of course he's not into women's soccer. That's why I brought Darla. Mm-hmm. Divorce. Fictional divorce. Fictional divorce. Fictional divorce. You bought the season ticket. You meet her at the game? Yeah. We are this deep already. And you know what? We, you know, we divorced over these tickets. Oh yes. He, he didn't want me to get these tickets. And I, after, after the conversation that we had, I was like, I got the, I got, and he thinks I'm a lesbian. Yeah. It gets even better. Yeah. And then season two, you show up and you're like, turns out he was right. Because now you're bringing a date to every game. Because this has gotta be prime. I don't know. Oh yeah. Stevie is this Prime lesbian date. I still haven't been, I haven't been to, um, what is it? Angel City Hitch says it's, I got a big thumbs up from Hitch. This is Prime. Well, hit Hitch is approved to, to speak on behalf. I would think, think that women's soccer would be like, this is perfect. This is almost like, yeah. What is the, the, mm-hmm. What is the festival where the Indigo Girls play? Lili Fair. This is Lili Fair with a ball? Is it not? Is it not? Is it not? And, and their, uh, I think their mascot is thighs. Right. What, what is, uh, what is the, the local pro, I think it's Angel City, right? Women's soccer team. Angel City. Yeah. There's so many local soccer teams, but the, but the visualization that is, is two thick thighs. Angel City Angels. Angel City Thighs. Yeah. All right. Okay. Well, I think we've solved this one, Chloe. You know what to do, uh, let's hear another one. Hey Rhett Link. This is Olivia. Um, so me and my fiance are getting married, but me and my fiance Atlas had decided that we were going to let it be a kid free wedding, and my aunt received her letter or invitation in the mail the other day and saw that her. 8-year-old son wasn't listed on the invitation and got super, super upset that we were not including him. And I'm just, how do I go about this situation because, um, I don't wanna bend for her. Mm. And she also kind of sent me a condescending text message. Um, it felt like she was kind of holding her help over my head, uh, for the wedding. And I, I don't love that. So would love to know your thoughts. I can't come to your wedding if I can't bring my 8-year-old son with me. I really want him to experience your wedding. It's your wedding. Ooh, coming out hot. Come on aunt note. That's your nephew though? He said My aunt's 8-year-old son. That's your nephew, right? Right. Well, cousin, maybe I, I do think that you're onto something with this childless wedding, I think. I think you can keep that going. Childless everything. Childless dates, childless movies. Childless church services. Did she say just childless it up. She is holding her. House over me or her help? Her help. Her help. Her aunt's not gonna help with the wedding if her 8-year-old son can't come to the wedding. Well, you, I, I see you're upset about it. Um, I like you have to respect you. Okay. People's decisions. And why, why does it matter so much? Why does it hurt your feelings so much? Well, we're not talking to the aunt. We're talking to Olivia. Right? That's true. Okay. So the first thing I will say, Olivia, is that now that you have. Made this decision and you have dictated this, you've set a boundary, but let's just come back maybe for the second time you get married. Uh, just, I mean, I'm just gonna give my overall POV I completely understand the desire for the child free wedding. I totally understand it. I've had children, but at the same time, I will say that isn't the whole point of a public ceremony. A public wedding is like you're getting married in front of your friends and family because you're basically like demonstrating this. Only if you want that to be the point. Hold, hold on. I'm just saying that like. The point is what you make it not for Olivia, but just for others who are thinking, I understand the convenience factor, but I think that maybe children seeing the, the, the, the, the marriage happening is maybe not a bad thing, but we're setting that aside. Who knows what she's having a porn wedding, you already set the sta you've already set the boundary. So now she's having a porn wedding maybe. And she could, if she wanted to. It could be a lingere porn wedding. It could be like Victoria's Secret wedding Wedding. Did you say porn wedding? A porn wedding. In, in, what? Is that what you did? What is that? I don't know, but I'm saying I don't think that the nephew should be there for it. Um, and she certainly has the right to make it That hold on. Is, do you know these people? Is that why you're, is that why you're so, I, I don't, I don't like when people get in other people's business, like when a decision is yours and then somebody. Is gonna of them try to manipulate to get their 8-year-old to come to it. The 8-year-old doesn't give a crap. This is probably true, but I could be wrong. I could be wrong about all this. So here's my solution. Okay? This is a quick turn. Take a deep breath. Call up your aunt and say, you know what? I'm gonna make an exception for you. Bring your 8-year-old son, who's my nephew or cousin, but he's got a man up. That was literally what I was thinking was, let's put a mustache on. He's gotta wear a mustache. He's got to wear a tux. He's gotta be balding a little bit. Let's go ahead and make him look like a, you can make an 8-year-old look like a very old man, right? I think he needs to, or a very old woman. Yeah. Like a drinking problem or something? No. What if he just has, um. Yeah, he's got old man clothes on. Give him a cane. Well, this actually, this was my solution. I was like, I, I feel like well, we're on the same page. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I, I, I'm just, I'm taking a little bit of issue with the child free wedding thing. You what? But I'm saying you've already done that. It's none of my business either. But now that you've done it, I just think that you have to think about minimizing the amount of damage, because if really holding the line here is the thing that you want to do, if that's gonna create more pain than not holding the line. Let, uh, the 8-year-old cross the line, but the 8-year-old has to cross the line on your terms and that they have to look like a very old woman when they come to the wedding. Oh, and no one will bat an eye. I think it might be difficult. Old woman. I'm saying I think, uh, it's difficult to make a 8-year-old boy look like an old man, but I think you make 'em look like an old woman probably. Well, if it's a porn wedding, he has to come as a pizza delivery man. Yes. And that is also an option. So you let them come, but conditions and that child will learn an important lesson, which is you don't get exactly what you want. If you, sometimes you wanna go to a wedding, you gotta, you gotta look like an old woman. I mean, the reason why also this kid does not wanna go to this wedding. Come on. That's probably true. Come on. That's probably true. You know, why do, why do Child freeweddings exist? I think baby free weddings a lot here. Here's the thing, because you, a lot of times people will say, don't disturb the, the ceremony. An 8-year-old is not going to disturb a ceremony, a baby, a toddler. That's why a lot of times it says children six and under not permitted. I think when you just say child free, you're like, where, what is a cutoff? 12? You don't, you can't have a 12-year-old at this wedding. I mean, what do you think Chase? You? You've officiated at least two weddings. Yep. Would you, would you say six and under? Is it the point where you would be really very distracted? I, I don't like talking to anyone. Six and under, so, yeah. Yeah. See, chase doesn't talk to children. That's not true as policy. Chase loves children. I just think that eight is the, what kind of kid is this? Eight year olds, they're not gonna do anything. Right. So six is the cutoff. A 5-year-old that's a problem. 5-year-old and under, like they have, they have, they have no. Ability to control themselves. They'll start whining openly. An eight year old's not gonna do that. I am wondering what the aunt's health has to do with, with anything. Help health. She's holding her health. No. Her help. I thought she said she her help. She's holding. She's not assisting. I thought we answered that earlier. I thought you said, I said, did she say house no help or you know, I think, and I thought she said health, like, like the day of the wedding, she's there to do some, uh, some crowd control. I don't know what she's gonna do. Yeah, she's making the cake and she's like, well, I'm not gonna do the thing that fold the nap to do because my 8-year-old can't come. Mm-hmm. Yeah. So I think maybe. If you, and if you make that exception, then you may be had ch To clarify on the previous invitation, I would like to say that it is children's six and under, not permitted. And you know what, in this case, go seven and under because you, 'cause you got an 8-year-old, you're letting through. But what if they just don't want kids at their wedding? What if it's just, what if it's more of like a party wedding? Okay, well that's different. Like it's more about the reception. Oh, you don't want kids with reception, child free reception. That's the norm. Kids. Kids don't go to the norm. The norm kids don't go to the reception. I, I thought that Oh, the ceremony's, like right before the reception. And then, and then the kids go home. The kids get, are we So they get to stay for the really good part. Yeah. Yeah. So, and I didn't know that was the norm, but, but that's because they don't, I don't think that's true. I don't think it's the norm, but I think it's an option. Yeah. 'cause it's like you got a bunch of adults getting drunk late into the night. So six for six and under. That makes sense. We don't know why eight, and I don't know why I got so upset. I get so upset about people being so opinionated without thinking things through. Okay. But we solved it, right? 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