Two chicken tender enter, one chicken tender leave. It’s a battle royale in the crispiest takes all. You may be wondering why we three are dressed in black, and Lily is dressed in white. That is because she is too powerful, and us three have banded together to take her down. She has won more than her fair share of these little food battles. So, that’s why we are doing the first ever three versus one challenge to finally take Lily down. No way, dude, I’m getting in with Lily. Defector! Get the heck out of here. Defector! I’m sticking with this chick right here, you guys are going down. Sixth man of the year I believe in us. We got a couple tricks up our sleeve though, what do you got? I don’t need no sleeves. You really don’t. Also, I’m proud of us. I feel like we’ve all been hitting the gym hard this year, you know? Yeah, we have. Like, not that, you know. Your lips are so dry, it’s distracting. Psyching him out! Let’s get cooking! – Hey, what’s up? – Hey, what’s up? Nothing much. You? Just hanging out. L-O-L. B-R-B. W-Y-D. T-T-Y-N. J-K. W-T-F. I’m sorry with, no, two R’s, no O. What was your screen name? L-C-M-T-V, 1, 3, 6, 9, A-F. Mine was, I had two. It was Nick, Nick 500. And also, gosh, underscore, she underscore. Owns underscore. Gosh she owns? Gosh she owns is my screen name. Isn’t that so embarrassing? Well, now that we broke the ice, we’re going to make some really great chicken tenders. These are koji marinated chicken tenders, and for those of you that don’t know what koji is, I guess the best way to describe it, it’s a fermented by product of rice. Yes. So there’s like a special kind of bacteria that you put over rice, and the sweetness of the rice kind of helps ferment it. Okay, I don’t think that’s good for your flora and fauna. I don’t know what that is. But I agree. Oh, for my hoo-ha? I don’t think it’s good for your hoo-ha to drink soup. This one’s sweet. Yeah? This one is, filtered. That’s why they look different. And this one is unfiltered. That’s really delicious. But we put both of them in our chicken mix along with a little bit of sugar, a little bit of paprika, just to give it some nice, I don’t know, something about red food. You know what I mean? Yeah. And I’m just gonna start making a dry mix with some mustard, ginger, garlic powder, white pepper, salt, and Tony C’s, of course, naturally. What is this, amateur hour? I don’t think so. Lily, tell them what you’re gonna do. I’m gonna make a truffle tonkatsu sauce. Wow. We have this nice fancy truffle ketchup. And then we have Worcestershire, soy sauce, dark soy, fresh ginger, fresh garlic. Some brown sugar. Mmm. Some mirin, and then this is a little extra truffle oil, if you wanna get extra truffle-y. And aside from us having a dry, a dry dredge, we’re also gonna dip it in a really lacy, beautiful, almost tempura batter. Yeah, I like that. Because we want super crunchiness. We want a super delicious flavor. And it’s just gonna make it a little bit different. It’s not your run, it’s not a run-of-the-mill chicken tender. Nothing about us is run-of-the-mill. No, we’re not your average girl. No, I, yeah, I’m a cool girl. I drink beer. You’re a, you’re a, pick-me girl. Yeah. Just kidding, you’re not. Oh, that’s fine. Just a little bit. I mean, everybody’s a little bit of a pick-me girl. Sarah Ann is a pick me girl. If you know, you know. We’re making three sauces. We’re doing a sauce flight. This is just one of three sauces. The other sauces, you just gotta stick around and see. How’s it tasting? It’s good. Yeah? It’s sweet. It’s truffle-y. Let me put a little more truffle oil. Nice. And I’m just going to let these kind of hang out and marry in here and really get nice and craggly. I really want these to be perfectly coated. And then by the time they go into that lacy batter, it’s just going to drip off and be stunning. Do you want to taste this? Sure. Okay, that’s really good. Nice job. I put it back in. You did a good job. I’m proud of you, Lily. Thank you so much. How does it feel to be the winner of so many 2v2s? I just, I’m here to have fun, and like, it feels really good actually. I don’t think that, I think you’re, I actually think you’re highly competitive and you refuse to lose. Yeah, I get mad when I don’t win. I like that about you. Don’t ever stop. This is a real competition. Good, I’m quite impressed. I find that a really great quality to have that I wish I had. I’m really comfortable losing. Yeah. Which is bad. I mean, maybe I can make you more uncomfortable with it. Yeah, can you? Yeah. I want you to, like, cry tonight at home if you don’t mind. Okay. Do you want me to record it and send it to you? I would like that. Okay. Are you going to send it to other people, though? It’s like training, like in sports. Yeah, it’s like Rocky. And what’s Rocky’s trainer’s name? Eye of the Tiger? No, no, no. What is the? Is that the same movie? Yeah, yeah, yeah. What’s, what’s Rocky’s? Cut me, Mick. Cut me, Mick. Yeah, you’re the Mick to my Rocky. You’re welcome. Okay, okay. Well, we’re gonna let this chicken hang out, and then we’re gonna get to frying and making some more sauces. Hey, do you love Sporked and do you love chicken tenders? Yeah. Well, what if I told you Sporked ate a ton of frozen chicken tenders to find out which ones are the best ones, and you can check it out on Sporked.com Whoa, I’m gonna go. I believe you. The one thing about Lily, honest, like honest Abe. Lincoln, the president. That’s my name. Okay, so, as you can see, we got a pile of chicken in this bowl here. We got this, this lovely little wet tempura-ish batter over here, and a new array of sauces. Remember how I said we’re doing a sauce flight? We weren’t lying. We weren’t lying. We’re honest. Cause Lily is. Sauce boss. Sauce, sauce boss. Sauce boss. An honest to God sauce boss. Tell them what you’re making, Lil. I am making a chili crunch comeback sauce over here, and then we’re gonna do a Sansho peppercorn, yuzu as well, ranch. Wow. Sansho peppercorn, yuzu, and ranch. I love all those words. Want me to name all the things? Yeah, go for it. I’m just gonna start frying stuff. Worcestershire, Sansho peppercorn, fresh dill, black peppercorn, fresh cilantro, Ono Nori. What’s Ono Nori? It’s a, just like a chopped up dried nori. Sick. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And then we have some sour cream, some buttermilk, some fresh garlic, and then some yuzu kosho. Very interesting. So, I’m gonna start with that one. Yeah, go wild. Go hog wild. Making sauces with my friend, Nicole. This chicken tender looks pretty good. That looks nice. Doesn’t that look nice? It’s a little unique. – Yes. – She’s a little different. Something like I’ve never seen before, but I like her. I like her. Lily, as long as you think we’re gonna win, that’s all I care about. I mean, if we don’t win, then I’m gonna be mad at both of us. Okay, okay, okay, okay. I’m gonna make you proud. If you’re not first, you’re. You’re last. Yeah. That’s what they say. Yeah. I’ve seen that on a lot of, what are those, Twitter pages? The ones that are like, always be, Josh, what are those Twitter pages called? Which ones? The ones where like, they tell you to always, like, be motivated and stuff? Oh, Grindset. Grindset. L-L-C Twitter! L-L-C Twitter! Or you can always go to Discord instead. Hashtag, hashtag grindset. That’s where I’ve seen a lot of those. Well, that’s one. My dear darling Lily, it looks like we got a few more to go. Yeah, I got sauces here. I think that like our sauce light is gonna look nice together too. Like the colors are, are orange. Red and white. What flag is that? Yeah, no, what flag is that? Orange, red, and white. It’s no flag. It’s the, it’s the flag of, I was gonna say Lily-stan. Lily-stan. I’m one of the Stans. That’s right. Lily, look at our bounty. It’s so beautiful. Look, look. This chicken, if I was on TikTok and I would graze my knife over it, it would make a noise. And they do a lot of like. Yeah. Yeah. They’re lying. All of those noises are fake. But us, we’re real. We’re real B words. We’re honest. Okay, can I just do something to that direction over there? Okay. Loser, loser, double loser, as if, whatever, get the picture, duh. Take it back! Oh! Hey, no! No, take it back! That hurts! – Damn. – Good! You’re going down! Sorry, it just felt natural, we’re talking about AIM, about B-R-Bs and T-T-Y-Ls, it just felt natural. So, we’re just gonna be pouring some sauces into some ramy rams, as we like to call them, A.K.A. ramekins. Put our chicken on a plate. We got the plate from HomeGoods. Can you tell? HomeGoods, sponsor us. We love HomeGoods. A little bit of green just to remind you. That you should look at the grass. It’s greener on the other side. No, you shouldn’t. You should look at your own garden because it’s beautiful. That’s deep. Thanks. That was my away message a while ago, and then some, some of these sesame seeds. They’re not even sticking! I know, they’re just going to the. Whatever. It’s beautiful. Yeah, throw them. It’s okay. Well, here is our beautiful, cozy, chicken tenders with a flight of sauces. Hope you enjoy, guest! Not today! Not today! No one loser, loser, double loser, as if, whatever, get the picture, does me. No one! Okay? Vee, I don’t care. Lily’s won everything. She’s won everything. She has everything to lose. We have nothing. Right? That’s not true. We are the dirtbags in the kitchen. Everyone knows that. I’m a dirtbag? Of course we are. Whenever we go out, you know, we’re the problem. We’re the ones people have to worry about. You know what I mean? We go to the bar, we’re there to tear things up. That’s why today’s chicken tenders. No, it’s called fun. These are inspired by fun. These are inspired by our kind of fun. All of our favorite drinks are going to be infused into every part of this chicken, every part of this sauce. Vee, tell them about the chicken. – Beer! – Beer! That’s what’s for dinner! That’s right! And chicken. And, a 50-year-old bottle of tequila. Yeah, bad tequila. I mean, with all due respect to Sauza. What happened to this? I don’t know, I found it. Did somebody spit on it? I didn’t know they were making three sauces, and so now we’ll make three sauces. And then, so now is how we end up with a spicy margarita aioli. And so that’s what we’re doing. That sounds sexy. Tell them, tell them about the chicken. Tell them what we’re doing. I’m gonna throw stuff in the blender and see what happens. We are making, beer tenders. Why? Cause we love beer! Chuck some raw garlic. – Yeah. – In there. I have some chicken tendies, they’ve been running, and some beer, some water, some salt, and some other fun stuff. And I’m gonna dredge it in this, and this, and some more of this. This is barbecue chips, you can find those at the bar. When you enjoy a nice beer. So, we decided to put it together. Throw a habanero in there. We’re doing a spicy margarita. People love spicy margaritas. I’m gonna throw a bunch of cilantro in there and make it green. Cause they made it, they made a sauce light. We’re gonna make a sauce light. Didn’t you make a michelada wings one time? No. Yes, we did. Yeah, you did. And we won, didn’t we? Yeah, they were good. Yeah, they were. One trick ponies. Just let me pour my tequila in my mayonnaise, and S your M. S, M? How’s that for AIM slang? Oh, that stinks. Oh. You can smell the liquor. Oh. It smells like a hangover. Oh, Josh. Try it, try it, try it. It’s good. Dude, try it. It’s good. I’m telling you, Vee. Oh. Right? You naughty! Oh my God, you’re a cool mom! I’m fine if you drink, I’d just rather it be with me and also mixed with mayonnaise. Oh. Yeah, that’s surprising, cause that tequila tastes like. I think it needs more tequila. And definitely needs more habanero. Vee, a little bit more tequila? Yeah! We have to, we have to cook. I never say no to tequila. Putting the whole habanero in there. A little more lime. A little more tequila. What? My heart. What? You got something to say over there? Loser. Needs a little more salt. Where’s the Tajín? You’re putting Tajín in it? I’m cooking on vibes and instincts right now. No! All of my planning has gotten me nowhere in this competition. Stop this man! All I do is lose. All I do is lose. No more. That’s not true. You act like we’ve never won before. More tequila. Don’t make me sad. You’re making me sad. Vee, I am guaranteeing victory today. I know I never do that. Yeah. But, I’m guaranteeing victory. Where’s the Tajín, man? Okay, I got chicken fingers, but I’m just gonna drop it in there. Come on. Come on. Stay on my chicken. Come in seed. Try it. Oh. That’s great. Liquor and mayonnaise. It’s like a fun margarita. Eat it. Tastes like a margarita. I’m in. I’m done with this sauce. Now I got a couple of these sauces. I’m in. Okay, I gotta fry some chicken and we’ll be back. Cook with a little bit of swagger, huh? Yeah. Come on, let’s get our confidence back. Loser, loser, loser. Double loser. Are you still back there? I get loser, double loser. How are you still back there? As if! As if! It’s so dismissive. Whatever, duh? You’re complaining like a cheerleader. So disrespectful. Hey, Vee. Hi, how are you doing? I like your sweater. Do you? It’s Christmas. And I thought I’d make beer to use. It is Christmas. You said that with the utmost confidence. Yeah, I did. Yeah. Ho, ho, hold my beer. Just kidding, that’s Santa’s job. We really, this is a very special beer for me. This is a beer of my 21 and up childhood. 21 and up childhood. Here, you want some? I was there. No, no. It’s going in the sauce, it’s going in the sauce. I’m making an old fashioned barbecue sauce. Again, we had no plans for this. I got abjectly jealous over their three sauces and I wanted to do it. Yeah, I’m gonna make some beer cheese. I have some, evaporated milk, some Worcestershire, some mustard, peppercorns, and I have gouda and some cheddar and I’m gonna mix it in and it’s gonna be one of our sauces because Josh knew this one just was not enough. I’m adding grated onion to the sauce. I think it’s gonna be nice. I want the onion to be able to soak up all that liquor. Two cousins just getting lit at the barbecue. Two cousins on a mission getting lit at the barbecue. Two cousins who refuse to lose. We’re like Kirk Cousins. Adding more milk! I got onion. And beer! I got tomato paste. A lot of liquor. Okay. Oh my God. Just kidding. Oh! You okay? Sorry. You almost burned my eyebrows off! I didn’t know you were gonna look into the pot! We got liquor in a pot! Well, warn somebody. Sorry, Vee, sorry. Alright, I’m gonna burn that off. Beautiful. What? Take the whisk out, it’s melting the. Is it melting? Oh my, it melted. No, it didn’t melt. It melted a little bit. The whisk melted a little bit. Oh my God. Josh! Josh, you’re supposed to be my boss. The fire in this pot represents the fire inside of our hearts to win this. You’re supposed to be the person who handles things the best. That’s why you’re. I’m handling things, do I not seem calm right now? I don’t understand. what the? All of this yapping. Yap, yap, yap. I don’t know what’s happening. I’m scared. I’m gonna dous the fire in vinegar. No. What? Okay. And we’re cooking. Orange zest. You think of old fashioned, you gotta get a little orange zest. I need more cheese. Where you got the cheese going? It need more. Sometimes, I think I’ve lost the plot on this, on this, on the sauce. Is that a Cutie? It’s the only orange I could find. I can’t stress enough. Are you zesting? Are you zesting a Cutie from crafty? Yes, this was, in fact, this was the last one. Anusha was reaching for it, and I said, I need that. And now I have it. Geez! – Poor Anusha. – Anusha, sorry about it. I’ll give you some, I told her I’d give her a tender. I put a lot of beer in here. We gotta adjust a little. Am I drunk? We’ve been inhaling a lot of fumes. Yeah, you know, the way you just looked at me was very drunk. It needs more bitters, you wanna try it? I’m scared. Ooh, I like it. Right? A little bit more salt. Tastes like, Panda Express. Yeah. I melted a little bit of the whisk. You can see the notch there. That’s because it was in fire. Other than that, I think the whisk is fine. You two are falling apart. We’re not falling apart. I am tired. First of all, this is how we thrive. I have never been more clear headed in my life. Double loser. Don’t say it! Do not say loser, loser, double loser, as if, whatever, duh! I’m ignoring her. I forgot to take get the picture. Is there shot glasses? No! What? Yeah, yeah. Vee, heads up, heads up. Put it in shot glasses. That’s what. Shot glasses can’t fit the tenders in there. No, plate the sauces in shot. I understand the, Oh, that would have been good. Oh, wait, no, because then the cheese dip, they’re not going to put the tenders. They can put the tenders in there. Nicole’s trying to sabotage us. Playing her own game. Foiled again! Oh, I just dropped a big chunk of cheese in the air. Oh, God. Where’s the chunk of cheese? I don’t know, it’ll melt. There’s some chives I put on it, if you didn’t know. Okay. The chicken tenders. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Wait, they garnished theirs with, like, sesame seeds? Yeah, but, who cares? No, no, absolutely not. Oh, okay, okay, okay. Yeah, that’s good, that’s good. Boom! Now who’s the loser, loser, double loser, as if, whatever, get the picture, duh! Not us! Mikayla, before you, you have two plates of chicken tenders and inexplicably six dishes of sauce. Do you promise to tell the whole truth and nothing but the truth, so help you God? All I do is tell the truth. I hope. Would you ever say to me, loser, loser, double loser, as if, whatever, get the picture, duh? I will absolutely say that to you. That is very in character, actually, if we’re being honest. Yeah, it is. It’s my brand. You’re gonna taste each, tell us who wins, you know the deal, which one do you want to eat first? I want to try this one, cause that texture is intriguing me. So, I’m gonna try this one first. I don’t, what is going on here? Inedible garnish! No, don’t eat that, don’t eat that. Disqualify, disqualify, DQ, DQ. It’s for your pocket. Vee and I were inspired by the place where we feel most comfortable in ourselves, which is the bar. That’s why we have beer brined chicken tenders. Don’t just, don’t, you don’t have to dissect like that. So, we have beer brined chicken tenders crusted in barbecue chips. This is a spicy margarita aioli. We have a beer cheese and then we have an old fashioned barbecue sauce all with tons of liquor in it. Oh, what kinds of liquors? Cause we’re at the bar. This has tequila in an old vintage bottle that we found hanging out in the cabinet gathering dust. Oh, so it’s old! It’s Sauza. It’s aged. No, it’s aged. Reposado. It was, it was blanco when we bought it. Are they trying to poison me? It was blanco when we bought it. They’re trying to poison me! I will say, the chicken is not dry. Which is really good. That is the beer brine on the chicken. It’s a good brine. I don’t love the beer, the beer cheese? Well, good news, you got two more sauces. I do like the other two sauces. Yeah, yeah, yeah. A lot. I’m trying to see what the flavor is of the chicken because I’m not really understanding it. It’s beer and barbecue chips. Yes. Yeah. We’re simple folk. Yeah, we are. In case you couldn’t tell. Okay. Okay. Okay. Now this one. Explain. Sure. So, we made for you koji marinated chicken tenders. You have a trio of sauces. We have a truffle katsu sauce. We have a Sansho peppercorn, yuzu kosho, buttermilk ranch. And a comeback sauce with chili crisp. Please enjoy. That sounds so fancy. This is like bar, this is like. We want to give you a really good experience. Yes, upscale, upscale. Tavern! Tavern. Our burgers cost $19. Okay. They sell their burgers at the museum. Interesting. I like how it got ripped. I’m a ripper. I like to see the inside. I like to see the moisture. Yeah, valuable, valuable. 24 hour brined. 24 hours? I don’t like beer. Me neither. It’s fermented in the. Yeah, we know so much about you. You do. So, we didn’t do that. They know my brand, y’all. We got you. What do I do? If I liked the chicken more. I don’t know! I’ll tell you this, Mikayla, it is battle chicken tender, but you are deciding on the dish in total, so do us a favor. On the count of three, put your hand over the winning dish. Okay? No. This is hard. One. This is really hard. Two. This is hard. Three. Wait, no! Hold on! I’m ready. Mikayla, put your hand over the winning dish in three, two, one. Good job. God damn it! I’m so sorry, guys. Thank you, Mikayla. No. You still liked our chicken, though. Josh, welcome to loserville population one, you! Don’t do that! Not again! Mikayla, thank you so much for your honesty and impartiality. It was completely impartial! Your decisions have been weighed and duly noted. This was good chicken. This was good chicken, y’all. Like, I don’t know what else to say. Like. It’s okay. Our friendship means nothing to you? Our friendship means everything to me! I appreciate your honesty. We’ll make better chicken next time. Okay. And sauces. Maybe don’t work with Josh. Do you like chicken tenders? Of course you do! Go to sporked.com to check out their 10 best frozen chicken tenders.