This is ‘Dispatches From Myrtle Beach’ with Charles Neal, and my son Link from ‘Good Mythical Morning’. Hello. How you doing, Link? I’m good, Dad. Daddy. Father. Pops. What’s poppin’, pops? Hey, well… You know, it’s been a really good day today, because that job that I’ve been working on since January, in that big house, I finished it, and my wonderful wife Nancy, went over there and helped me get everything cleaned up, and put back, and we’re out the door, I ain’t gotta go over there… Well, not right now, I gotta go back in about a month or two to do something on the outside- Well, why? You’re talking about being… You talking about being done, and you not even done talking about being done, and you’re talking about, “Well, I gotta go back, I gotta do the outside.” Okay, let’s just bask- Yeah, but I’m done on the inside. In the glory of the victory, congratulations, Dad. Since January, you’ve been… You’ve been stringing these people along, You’ve been dragging your feet? We had an understanding, and of course, this was a big house, I mean, 5,000 and something square feet. Whoa. How many bedrooms are we talking about? Four upstairs, and then a crows-nest up above that, and then a master bedroom, and a bathroom downstairs, and then a hall… Steps going downstairs to the bottom floor, and I had to paint all that, and everything, so it is a pretty big job, painted the ceilings, the walls, the trim-work, everything. Woo-hoo! Congrats, Dad. Did you grow to hate this house? No. Every time you drive by at night, and be like, “Ugh! I spent seven months of my life…” Or, not quite seven. No, no. But about… Maybe four? Four. Yeah. Yeah. That would be correct. Yup. Yeah. Is the check in the mail? Oh, I’m going to pick my check up tomorrow. Oh, you do the face-to-face, you just grab that check, right out of their hand? Well, I’m gonna happen to be in that part of the world, and hey, I don’t have to worry about it, these people pay me, they ask me all the time in advance, “Do you need some money? Do you need some money?” And I don’t… You know, I said to ’em, “I’ll get some all along.” And I did, so these people’s good to me, yeah. All right. Good to me, yeah. What were you gonna ask me? I said what… I know you been traveling around a little bit, but you… You were in North Carolina for some things but- It’s a top-secret. It was a top-secret mission. Yeah, that’s right. But your other mission was, you had to fly back with your mother, and mother-in-law. Mhmm. I mean, Mitsy, she’s 72- And she had not ever flown- Not ever flown. And yeah, she did… She did good, she really did. You know, I took the video of her, she doesn’t want me to share any of her video, but like, I made her look out the window, she didn’t wanna look out the window, and then she was fine. The one thing that she did… I told ’em, I said, “Listen, y’all got each other, and if you need me, just throw something across the aisle, and wake me up, and then I’ll… I’ll do what I can for you.” But I wasn’t like you know, I wasn’t like telling her every, single thing, but I, you know, I told her to open the window and look out when we took off, and like, she got up the nerve to do that, and then she was fine. Turned out to be a very smooth flight. And then I looked over there, and she was like, she was looking at you know… You know, with the pre-flight stuff, she was looking at all of the diagrams of like how to escape down the slide, you know? She was studying all that stuff that like… You know, I don’t even remember that stuff’s in there. So, she was looking at that, and she put that away. And then I looked over there again, and she was doing the same thing with the barf bag, she’s like, “Ooh.” Looking at the… She didn’t… I think she thought it was a brochure of some kind, ’cause they’re flat. She’s looking, and I, I was just watching her, she didn’t see me watching her across the aisle, and like, she was inspecting the thing, all of a sudden she turned it up, and I saw her open it up, and the light came on, “Oh, this is… This is a barf bag.” I don’t think she kept it as a souvenir, but they did give her wings as her… As her… ‘Cause she told ’em that it was her first flight, so they gave her like some wings, and a pack of cookies? I don’t, uh. Pack of cookies. And then I went to sleep, but I woke up… I woke up to a clamber over there on the other side, and I could hear them talking to each other, because I mean, they talk loud. Like, Christy’s… Christy’s mom was a teacher’s assistant for a kindergarten and 1st grade like for most of her life, so she talks like she’s talking to a classroom at all times! Even on the plane, and mom can’t hear that well, so they’re sitting there, talking to each other, “Well, I didn’t… I’m sorry, I’ve turned over your water.” You know, I think Mitsy came back from the bathroom, and mom had like a water, and then like, she didn’t see, and like, you’re scooting by her, and she like spills the water all in, in her seat, and I… And my eyes remain closed, but I heard something was going on, I was like, “You know what? I’m just gonna keep my eyes closed for this one.” And I peeked a little bit, and the flight attendant was bringing a stack of napkins, so I just said, “You know what? I’ma let him handle this, that’s what… That’s what his job is.” And then I’m there for the real emergencies, which never happened. Yep. So, I feel like I took some good pictures, I put ’em on the family group chat, and sent ’em back home to Christy’s Dad, and everybody, so they knew that they were safe, but the butt got a little bit wet… Oh, and she went to the… She didn’t tell me this ’til we got off the plane, you don’t… You forget, when you fly as much as I do, you just forget all the things you have to learn when it’s your first time, and I said, afterward, I was like, “Well, how was the bathroom?” And she was like, “Well, the bathroom, it was tight in there, but it was also dark. Like, it was like… I mean, I almost couldn’t see anything in there, I had to figure out if I was going in the right hole.” Is what she said, and I was like, “Well, when you go, when you lock the door, the light comes on.” She was like, “Well, I guess I didn’t lock the door.” But nobody walked in on her, but she couldn’t see anything when she was in there. Oh Lord, poor thing. So she’s… But she did really well, I mean, she… She enjoyed it. I think honestly she was like, “I don’t know what all this hubbub is about, people getting all up in arms about flights.” ‘Cause you know, Christy has flight anxiety, her sister has it. And I was like, “You’re the normal one.” You’re actually normal if you can just get on a flight, go somewhere, and get off, and be there. That’s how normal people fly. I said that in front of Christy just to give her a little bit of shit. But, so now they’re at the house, and I’ve… I just so happen to need to work this week. Just so happen. I’ll be home every night for dinner, and I’ll be available for any type of dinner conversation or anything they need, but this, I mean, this is pretty much, this is a big week for Christy. It’s for Christy, ’cause her mamma ain’t never been out there, so. Well, it’s more on Christy, like she’s got a lot on her plate to figure out where she’s gonna take ’em, and what she’s gonna be doing with ’em, and all that type of stuff. Oh, she can handle that- See if they can get some thigh food, right Dad? Yeah. You remember that? Yeah. Thigh food. Yeah. Do you still call it ‘thigh food’, or was that just ’cause you were reading the sign out loud when you came out here? Uh, I don’t… I can’t… I don’t even remember. I mean, how long ago was that? That was… I would never forget it. We talking about Thai food? That’s right. You read the sign out loud when we were driving past the sign that said ‘Thai Food’. Oh, okay. You said ‘thigh food’, you remember? Yeah. No, I don’t remember, but you know. Okay, well you did. And that’s all right. Thigh food! Thigh food. Well Link, I have noticed that my Dispatch From Myrtle Beach, Beast, are not… They’ve kinda slacked up a little bit. In what way? I need to get ’em back in the thing about sending me some more emails, we ain’t getting as many emails and questions, and stuff. So, the mail bag is getting a little light? Getting a little dry. Oh, dry? It’s getting a little. Yeah, yeah. Well, tell ’em. You need to issue a, a Myrtle Beast challenge right now. So, come on you Myrtle Beast, y’all got to step up to the plate. I keep trying to step up to the plate and give you what you want, and Link does too, so we need y’all to step on up to the plate and get us some more emails going here, and so we’ll have some more stuff to talk about. What kinda things do you wanna hear, Dad? Oh, you know I like anything that they send, I mean, I’ve asked… I’ve answered questions about people’s love life, and the things that they do, and paint questions, and try to help ’em out what to do with all that stuff, and where to go on a trip, and where to go, and different things- Just picking your brain. You want ’em to pick your brain. Yes, I do. Yeah, send me something different. Send him something different. There you go. And you still take jokes too, right? Oh yeah- Sometimes we’ll go back to a joke. Okay, well remind ’em of the email address, I’m sure you remember it. ‘ratherbshaggin@53aol.com’. Okay, you put the ‘@’ at the wrong place, but that’s fine, they’ll figure it out. ‘ratherbshaggin@…’ What did you say? ‘ratherb’… ‘rather@53@bshaggin’? No, I said ‘ratherbshaggin53@aol.com’. That’s exactly what you said, that’s right. That is right. I try. You know, sometimes when you get old, things don’t just come right out like they ought to. So, you Myrtle Beasts help me out, so send me some more stuff to ‘ratherbshaggin53@aol.com’. Come on, get with it! Get with it! Get with it. We’re here. We’re ready. All right. All right, I like that. Did you know that Rhett and Link have a grooming line? Well, I didn’t. Unleash Your Legendary Style with their line of Mythical Grooming & Personal Care Products. The collection features items for the hair on your face, hair on your head, and for everything else. Available now at ‘mythical.com’. What you wanna do? Well Link, we’re gonna do another, ‘Don’t Tell Nanna!’ Episode. Okay. All right. Don’t Tell Nanna! So, this is something that… All right, that I’m not supposed to tell her? All right, what is it? Well, it’s kinda got something to do with Nanna, and it’s got something to do with your Aunt Teesie Oh okay. And do you know anything about a Santa Claus that you and Rhett borrowed one time? Uh, am I on the stand right now? Because I don’t… I don’t… What is the line? I don’t… I don’t have a recollection, one way or the other. But off the record, I do remember there was a… There was a Santa Claus that we featured in a short film that we were making. This was many years ago though. Before you ever moved to LA. Yeah, this might’ve been 2000… It’s gotta be in 2005 if it’s the same Santa I’m thinking about. Are we walking about a plastic Santa that’s like 5ft tall- About 5ft tall, it danced, and did all this stuff, and when y’all got through with it… Well, what? What, what? Well, I mean, you could tell the people that you know, so I don’t have to steal your thunder, but you know that you broke it. Uh, I don’t… And you did what with it? I don’t recall breaking it. You don’t recall breaking it? And you don’t recall… And you don’t recall gluing it back together, and putting it back in the box, and not telling your Aunt Teesie nothing about it? It’s one of them Santas that like, it had like a… It would dance, it would do like one of these? You know? I’m sure you can do it better than me, Mr. Shagger. Let’s see your best dancing Santa. Yep, I think we’d have to tilt… Most of the action is below the camera. Yeah, that’s right. He was kinda like this. And he was, he was plastic, and he was hollow, and he was riding in the back of our truck, my truck, and I think that… I think he might’ve fallen out a little bit. A little bit? Yeah. Just a little bit. And I think it busted him up a little bit, but he would still dance, we just needed to get that certain part of the dancing- Face. His face was… Oh, it was his face? Yeah. Kinda crackled? Cracked, and come apart, and I don’t know what kinda glue y’all used, but y’all glued him back together, ’cause when Tracy took it, Aunt Teesie took him out the box, he was still together. But like, what’s the timeline of this, sir? Because it was summer when we made the video. That was correct, and you know when… You know when Christmas is, don’t you? I believe it’s the end of December. Well, you know, but you decorate your house, and get everything out, either right after Thanksgiving, or right you know, the first week, and she was getting all her Santa Claus’ out, and all her other… Her one Santa Claus, and putting it up on the porch, and it won’t, it just won’t dancing like it used to, but she… She really didn’t pay a whole lot attention to it that Christmas, ’cause y’all did… Hey, with the way she tells it, y’all did a really good job fixing it, but the next year when she took it out, the side of the face fell back off, because where y’all had put that glue on, and it had been hot in the building, it had melted the glue, and Aunt Teesie didn’t have a Santa Claus no more. Well, hold on now, she did have one. It just didn’t have as much of a face as she might’ve wanted. So, she stuck it back on there, and turned it sideways, and used it one more year on the porch, but you know, the main thing about this Santa Claus is… This is just, I’m just kinda giving you what she told me all about this Santa Claus, and everything. And trying to get to the point, and says… You know, she said she paid $250 for this Santa Claus, and it broke, and you, and Rhett tried to fix it, but it didn’t work out too good, and she, she really liked this Santa Claus, really liked this Santa Claus, Link. Almost to a weird point. Well, I mean, she likes Christmas, and decorating just like Nancy does. Yeah, but it’s a little weird to be that attached to a Santa, I’m just saying. And she knew that you know, she didn’t say a whole lot about it then, but about a month ago or so, she brought this up to me- Again? A month ago? This was 2005. A month ago, and I mean, I didn’t know anything about this ’til about a month ago. And she said, “I didn’t really say anything…” ‘Cause she threw it away about three years ago. Okay. But her point is you know, when you and Rhett, just like everything else, and kinda like you tell me about Dispatch is, “You gotta be patient, and get more people involved, and you might make some money.” But you know, she’s a… She said she really didn’t wanna say, ’cause you know, y’all were trying to get started, probably weren’t making a lot of money. No, we weren’t. And getting along, but then she said- We had to beg, borrow, and repair, left and right. Yeah, that’s right. But you know, she said, “It’s been about 10 or 12 years…” Well, I told her it’d been longer than that, ’cause y’all been in LA 13, so it had to have been 15 years ago, that was my figuring out. But I told her Link… No, she told me Link, she said, “You know, I believe he could afford a Santa Claus for me now.” Is that how this is? I mean, is she talking about it like… One that dances, 5ft tall, just like that one. Okay. And I’m gonna tell you what else she done, she looked on Amazon, or one of them places that you look, and she found some used ones, and they several on there that you might ought to have Logan or somebody look up, you might wanna purchase one, and just surprise her, and ship it. She been hanging onto this… This is quite a grudge. She’s been hanging onto this for 15 years. She really loved that Santa. Now listen, I have a couple of things I gotta say, okay? First of all, I know that you’re just the middle man, and so, I’m not, I’m not directing any animosity towards you, or anybody really, I have no animosity, I just feel a little attacked, I feel there’s some assumptions being made here, and we gotta talk about a couple of things. First of all, the time between the borrowing of the dancing Santa, to the discovery of any problem with the dancing Santa was not five-months later, but a year and five-months later. There has to be some sort of statute of limitations on retribution for something of this nature. But that’s assuming that we actually broke the Santa, ’cause there’s a lot that can happen in a year and five months, to a Santa, and there’s other people moving stuff around, might be dropping boxes, might be rearranging storage stuff, and they might swoop in, and need to do some repairs to damage that they made. So, you’re not… But you know, Lance and them was still kinda young, you ain’t trying to say that they might’ve broke it? I am. I am definitely saying that my cousin Lance may have broken that Santa, ’cause I don’t remember… I remember it maybe falling off the back of the truck, I don’t remember anything about the face being broken, I don’t have a recollection of that- You don’t remember anything about the glue- I don’t remember nothing about glue, but it sounds like… I don’t remember anything about glue, but I do remember that you saying that it was a really good glue job, so good that she didn’t even notice. So, let’s say I did do it, and I’m not saying I did it. That’s my… You gonna do like that song, “That’s my story and I’m sticking to it.” Yeah. So, let’s say hypothetically we glued it back together, it was a good glue job, and then, a year after that, a lot can happen when you’re re-boxing, putting up, pulling down, you know, it’s like… That can’t.. I can’t be responsible for everything that happens to this Santa Claus into the indefinite future, into perpetuity, like come on Dad, I mean, look at it from my side. Come on. Hold on. Hold on a minute, you taking this, you going about this all the wrong way, just like sometimes when you and Christy, and y’all have a little spat, and you have to let things smooth over, you know it’d probably be a whole lot better for you, if you just go by a damn Santa Claus and send it to her. Well, I didn’t say I wasn’t gonna do that, I was getting- This is the public forum. This is a public forum, what are people gonna think of me if they think I’m the type of guy that would break my beloved Aunt Teesie’s Santa, and just go behind her back, and try to fix it, and not tell her about it? What kinda person does that make me out to be? Come on Dad, it’s like, this is a PR fiasco we’re talking about here. You know, this impacts you too, I mean, we gotta watch out for each other, that’s the whole point of this segment, ‘Don’t Tell Nanna’ is we gotta get our story straight. Well, I’m trying to do that for you, because you keep talking about it, and trying to not take any blame, and we don’t care whether you take blame or not, you should’ve just said- Who’s the ‘we’ here, Dad? I’ll just send Aunt Teesie a Santa Claus, and it’d all been over. You didn’t… You don’t know about this. I’m not done talking either. ‘Cause I’m about… Whose side are you on, Dad? Come on, we in this together. It’s like, if I go down, you’re comin’ down with me. Hey, I wasn’t in the truck with that Santa Claus. I’m talking about this show Dad, if it comes out that I’m a Santa destroyer, that I lie to my own Aunt, nobody’s gonna wanna listen to a show like that with a guy like that. Well see, I don’t think you ever lied to her, you just didn’t ever tell her nothing. That’s right. See, now you talkin. There you go. So, you didn’t ever lie to her. There you go. You just didn’t ever bring it up. And I also didn’t do it, so let’s remember that. Yeah, and all you Myrtle Beast out there, he didn’t do it. There you go, Dad. ‘Cause who else was there? I mean, why is this all about me? Let’s make this about somebody who’s not here to defend him… There you go. We could get Rhett, it was probably Rhett’s fault. Yeah, I don’t… If I am to recall anybody breaking that Santa’s face, I would probably recall… I’m not saying that I am, but if I were to, I’d probably recall that it was him who did it. Yeah. And then him who glued it. And them who said… He said, “Just box it back up. It’s as good as new.” You know? It’s not his family. You know? He does this type of stuff all the time, but he… Yeah, and so here I am, taking a fall for him all these years later. You know what I’m gonna do? I’m gonna give him this Amazon link that you’ve been talking about, and I’ma give him an opportunity to make it right. That’s what I’d do, yeah. And I’m not gonna invite him on this show to defend himself, and I’m not gonna bring it up to him, I’m just gonna send him the link and say, “You need to take care of this.” Ooh, Lord. I hear you, all right? Sounds like you got a plan, and you gonna come out on top again. Again, that’s right. She’s still hung up about that Santa? She brought it up to me a month or two ago. It was not that special of a… It was a short film called ‘One Man’s Trash’, and we entered it in the Carrboro Film Festival, I think we might’ve won a little award, we did not win any money. We lost money on the endeavor, I will tell ya. You can’t remember what you put that… What you made a video, but you can’t remember nothing else about it? I can’t remember. I cannot, nope. I cannot recall. But we’re not telling Nanna, and we’re not telling Teesie about this conversation. No. But okay, she might have a Santa showing up at her house. I have some runway here before it gets to be Christmas time. You’ve got four or five months to see if you can get Rhett to take responsibility for it, and send her a Santa Claus. You know what? I’ll just do it, I’ll do it out of the kindness of my heart. I just want this to go away. I want everybody to be happy, so I’ll do it, I’ll find a dancing Santa with a perfectly unblemished face, and I will mail it to Aunt Teesie’s door, anonymously, ’cause I don’t wanna take any credit for this, I don’t want this to be about me. Mhmm, and that’s what I’m gonna do. Thank you Dad, for bringing this up, and for keeping this in the cone of silence, and secrecy, between me, you and all the Myrtle Beast listening. Yeah, that’s right, ’cause we’re not gonna tell Nanna, and we’re not gonna tell Aunt Teesie. That’s right. Now, it’s time for a word from our sponsor. Well, hey you Myrtle Beast, I’ve found a new place for us to go eat down here at Little River South Carolina, and the name of the place is called the ‘Blue Drum’, and boy, they got some good seafood, and they got anything that you want, they’ll fix it for you. And if you’re down here in North Myrtle Beach, or down here at Little River, right across from it, if you wanna get some good seafood with a wonderful place that’s on the inland waterway where you can watch the boats go by, and all that. So, come on, and go to the Blue Drum down here, Little River South Carolina. Little River, huh? Is a Blue Drum a fish? Well, a ‘drum’ is a fish. Is that what they’re referring to? I think there is a blue drum, you know me, I don’t fish. Or is it just a drum that happens to be blue? I don’t know. I don’t know. But it’s a good place to go eat, so come and try it down here, at Little River South Carolina, and I think you’ll really enjoy it. Really enjoy it. Might need to give Aunt Teesie a gift certificate to that too, I don’t know. I’ll try. Well Link, I reckon we’ve talked enough about Santa Claus’ and everything else, so- ‘Tis the season. It’s been fun having you here with us today, and we’ll be back next week for another one, so don’t forget to follow and subscribe wherever you get your podcast on YouTube. And while you’re at it, rate and review us on Apple Podcast, and listen, if you’ve got a question, comment, or story you’d like to share with me, email me at ‘ratherbshaggin53@aol.com’, send me them questions on in, and y’all have a great rest of the week, and we can’t wait to tantalize your taste buds again next time. Hoo-hoo! That’s a good one, Dad. All right, thanks for the heads-up- Well, I love you. You’re looking out for me, I appreciate it. Love you too.