This is “Dispatches From Myrtle Beach” with Charles Neal and my son, Link, from “Good Mythical Morning” just stretching on out there. Mm-hmm. How you doing, Link? You still think about stretching? ‘Cause I’ve been staying on you about it. I’ve been- Oh yeah, and I have learned that a while. I don’t see it with what I do for a living much. And I have figured out that while I’m sitting and doing these podcasts sometime, that when I get through I have to stand up and stretch my back out, and do that stuff like you said and ark it out and do my shoulders and head over, so- There you go. I can understand why you do that now, so- Are you telling me that you can teach a old dog new tricks? I says, hey, you teach me stuff all the time, Son. You wanna roll over? You wanna roll over? You wanna scoot your butt on the floor? Uh. He’s thinking about it, y’all. Did you have a good Father’s Day and everything? I did. Each of my kids showed how much they loved me. And of course, and another thing that we haven’t mentioned is your special appearance in Raleigh at the tour, you know? Oh yeah, that’s right. Of course, at every stop of the tour, you come on with a video call, but- Yep. You made a special surprise appearance in person in Raleigh, North Carolina at my hometown stop, right? That would be correct. Thank you for doing that, Dad. And- Forgot to mention that. Hey, boy, it was a lot of fun, and I mean, it was kinda like that thing y’all had in- MythiCon in Austin- Austin, Texas. Yeah. MythiCon, yeah. That when I come out, the people kinda were aghast a little bit, and they was hollering my name. But you didn’t have to be an alien this time. Yeah, no more alien this time- Did you miss that? Just me. Not being dressed up as an alien? No, that was fun too. That was fun. Aye. Yeah. That was quite a moment. So, yeah, and we’re looking to do more, you know, to get back and do some tour stops when we can. We got two in the fall, two in Texas in November. But then after that, maybe we’ll add some more for next year. Maybe you can swing by- Oh, yeah. To one of ’em. Yeah. We’ll see. You didn’t have to send me a plane ticket for that one so you can save it for one of them other places. Oh, okay. All right. All right, I’ll let you know if we line anything up. See where you wanna show up. Yeah, that’s fine. Hey, I enjoyed it. It was fun. When I get to do something with you and Rhett, it’s a good time. Yeah, it’s a good time. Always glad to have you, Dad. Your video call bit always goes over well. I don’t wanna give it away ’cause, you know, you don’t wanna give away parts of it if we keep doing it, but gimme some “Dispatch” from your end. What’s up? Well, it’s summertime and it’s a good time to go to the beach. The waters is hot, I bet. Oh, but it’s hot. But you know, hey, that’s the reason you live down here, Son, is, of course, June is still a pretty good month to go to the beach and even July a little bit. And I don’t go a whole lot in August ’cause it’s just too hot. Too hot. Gotcha. But I’ve been recognized on the beach a couple of times, and with all the students and different people down here. So, you know, more people getting to know about “Dispatching From Myrtle Beach.” So that’s, you know? I’m still sit back when, you know, somebody walks up to you and says, “I know who you are. You’re Charles Neal. You’re link’s son, aren’t you?” Now when they do it, it kinda makes you think, hmm. And so, it’s pretty amazing. Love it. My garden started coming in then been picking string beans and putting them up, so- What’s your main thing in the garden, string beans and what? Well, this time it’s string beans, and I planted some more cabbage, and then I got 30 tomato plants planted. I don’t care about that. Yeah, I know you. But hey, my wife loves tomatoes so we’re hoping we get- Yeah, I know you’re not doing it for me, trust me. No. As long as you know that. That’s the only difference between me and you, and they ain’t a whole lot of differences. But I love me a good tomato sandwich with Duke’s mayonnaise. Oh lord, have mercy. Yeah, that sounds good to me too if you take the tomato off, just have a mayonnaise sandwich. Oh, no. My bad. I fix you a Duke’s mayonnaise sandwich, and I’ll eat your tomato on my tomato sandwich. Okay. All right, that’s a deal. I’ll take care of it. That’s a deal. Well, I got a set. Michelle sent me something, said I wanted to share an email with you that I got from Michelle. Okay. She says, “Hey, Charles. I just wanted to write you and tell, and you about to get ready for this ’cause this is for you. Okay, I like how you’re using this different voice. Is this what you think Michelle’s voice sounds like? Oh, I don’t- Hey, Charles. Yeah. Just trying to- Hey, Charles. You know, talk to her like one of my kids. Hey, hey Michelle. “But I just wanted to write you and tell you that your son has changed my life. Link talked about his blow drying technique that he does to dry himself after a shower.” Right. “And I tried it and my mind was blown, no pun intended- But what’s a “pun intended”? “Lots of love,” Pun intended. “It has changed my life for better.” “Lots of love”? So now, I’m learning something about you ’cause I don’t know nothing about, as much hair as I got, I don’t know about getting a blow dry and trying to blow me off. But you need to enlighten me a little bit about this drying off with a blow dryer. I haven’t told you about this? No. You haven’t heard? That word hasn’t gotten to you that your son has a blow dryer? No. I have blow dryer. All I thought it was just to help blow dry your hair. No, no, no, no, no, no, no. No? No, no, no, no, no. You ever been to a car wash, one of those automated car washes, and it’s like all the brushes come down. Oh yeah. And then at the end, there’s blowers. Yeah. And they blow off the car- Blows your car off. So you don’t have any spots on it. Mm-hmm, mm-hmm. Do you see any spots on me? No. Mm-hmm. Is that a hint? Are you figuring out what I’m doing? It’s gotta be a little more ’cause, I mean, the towel drives you off and don’t leave no spots on you. So tell me about why you do this. What got you into this? I mean, is this a national trend now, or is this something I can- This is just something I’m making happen. Something you did. This is a me making this happen thing. Oh. I get out of the shower and, well, I drape my towel over the shower. So, I mean, I turn the water off and first, being dry is important to me. I like to get wet. I like to wash, but then I like to get dry, and I like to get all the way dry. And that involves, first, hand squeegeeing my entire body. Okay. Are you still with me? Do you know what I mean by that? Yeah, just rub it down and getting- Yeah, you rub your body, you rub your arm down. You rub your front down. Yeah. And you run your legs down. And all this water just comes off that you don’t have to get off on your towel. Then you’ll grab my towel, and I dry off all the way. I even dry my feet off as I’m stepping outta the shower ’cause I don’t like my bath mat to be wet. Oh, when I do that a little before, I pull my towel down, I kinda wipe, but I got a lot more hair than you, and I push it off of ’em and then I dry off. I kinda, you know, didn’t know we had that in common. Oh, we do. And then you’re telling me, at that point, you’re completely dry? No, then I dry off with the towel. Dry my hair off first. I’m saying, after you dry off with a towel, Oh. You’re completely dry? I’m pretty dry, I don’t feel no more water. But I’m calling your bluff on this one. You need to think more closely because after I dry off with the towel, there’s still some dampness. Like, my hair is not completely dry. Like, first of all- Oh no. That’s why you use a blow dryer on your hair, right? Even when you towel dry your hair, is it still a little damp? It’s always a little damp, but I don’t- That’s right. Hey, I don’t blow dry my hair, so. Well, I- I let it dry aunaturel. Well, I have to dry my hair completely so that I can style it the way that I wanna style it. That’s a key component to my hairstyle is to be blown completely dry. And then I put my pomade in there, which makes it do what it does. But the same applies to my body, my crevices, and my undercarriage, and my arm pits. Because the next thing I’m gonna do, if I’m gonna put on deodorant, it’s not completely dry under there, just like my hair is not completely dry. And I don’t wanna put deodorant on like a wet armpit. So once I have the blow dry on, and I’m blow dry my hair, whoop, then I just take it, and I blow dry my armpit. And then, after a while it occurs to me, well, I’m also gonna blow dry my chest hair. And then I’m like, well, I’ve got some dampness down here in my undercarriage. Yeah. My crack is moist. Yeah. I am gonna blow dry my crack. And the front part, the front crack. You know what I’m talking? Well, I don’t have a front crack. No, I hope not. I don’t. And that’s the only way to get everything completely dry so that then there’s no, like, there’s not like rubbing moisture down there. It’s dry and it’s like this, it’s not like, like, yeah. Well,- I blow dry my entire body, Dad. Yes you do, and you just keep right on doing that. It sounds like it takes too much time to be doing all that to me. I mean, I’m gonna slip on a nice little pair of red or yellow little, it ain’t underwear. It’s little short things that I sleep in. Okay. And I don’t usually go right to bed, and I’m usually pretty dry when I get in the bed. I bet you got a soggy bottom. You’re soggy down there. You need next to- Yeah, well, you know- You need to assess it. You got me, you know? You got me peeing in the shower. Mm-hmm. Now, you want me to get out of the shower, Right. Squeegee myself off. Right. Dry off with the towel. That’s right. And then get the blow dryer out, and blow my hair, and blow up under my arms, and blow my crack in the back, up in the front and everything, and whatever thing- Now, be careful in the front ’cause you don’t wanna burn the bits. No. No. It feels so good to be so dry. You don’t know that you’re not dry until you’ve actually gotten dry. And once you do it, you will feel how much dry you are and how not dry you’ve always been. And you’ll thank me. Well, let me ask- Just like Michelle is doing right now. Wait a minute, let me ask you this. Thank you, Michelle. What speed or temperature, you know, your dryer’s gotta- All the way. Low? Oh, hell no. High and hot. I blow dry my back, dry my front. I keep that blow dryer out there. Sometimes, sometimes I put the dryer down on the counter, and I leave it on and then I turn around, and the top of my counter is at such a height that if I turn around and bend over, it’s the perfect height to dry. Oh, lord. Okay, well- Now, you don’t want anybody walking in on you when you’re doing that, but it’s nice. No, this should be something you do in the confines of your own home. That would be correct. But if you need a video to know how to do it, I will send it to you. That’s all right. I believe I can miss that one. But Michelle says that I’ve changed her life. I’ve blown her mind. I mean, Michelle, No pun intended. So Michelle- It’s great. Me and Michelle know, hey- You and Michelle can just keep right on blow drying yourself off. I gotta wait and see if I’m gonna try this or not, but I will, if I do try it, I will admit to it and let you know one time if it had any effect in how I think, instead of just using a towel because you Michelle and my son, Link, so- Thank you, Dad. I wanna thank you ahead of time for just trying. You don’t have to love it. You don’t have to do it more than once. But I’m just thanking you ahead of time for giving it a shot. Well, I’ll let you know more about it when I do try it. Yes, he said when he does try it. Oh, and one more thing. You said something else when you read Michelle’s letter. When you said, “No pun intended,” what was that? It said, “No pun intended. Lots of love. LOL.” Okay. Ain’t that what that means? No, that’s not what LOL means. It doesn’t mean lots of love. What does LOL mean? Well, it doesn’t mean lots. You know, it means laugh out loud. Oh, laugh out loud. No pun intended, laugh out loud. Okay. LOL, Laugh out loud. You always thought that that was lots of love. Lots of love. Yeah. Okay. All right. I’ll take it both ways. Need more love in the world. Yeah, we do. Laugh out loud, okay- Laugh out loud, there you go, Dad. See I gave you that one because- That’s the reason to put that little smiley face beside LOL. Right. Okay. See I ain’t too old to learn nothing. No. Something. Mm-hmm, there you go. Everything. Rhett and Link heavy holy toys and games collection in mythical store. It features unique products like their official license Rubik’s Cube, 500 piece jigsaw puzzle, mythical coloring book, and their very own card game. We’re still good for one for all. That ain’t worth a damn. So I wrote out W-H-O-L-E-E-E-E. So it’s like Rhett and link have a whole toys and games collection. Okay. So it ain’t holy? Nope. It is not holy. That is okay. Which is on me. I should have told you that. No, that’s fine. No, no it ain’t your fault. Okay. You got it. Rhett and Link have a wholey toys and games collection in mythical store. You did it again. Rhett and Link have a whole. Okay, Rhett and Link have a whole toys and games collection in the mythical store. It features unique products like their officially licensed Rubik’s Cube, 500 piece jigsaw puzzle, mythical coloring book, and their very own card game. We’re still good. Fun for one, fun for all. Check out the Toys and Games collection now at mythical.com. Nailed it. This show is sponsored by HelloFresh. Make delicious food a priority this summer with quick, convenient recipes delivered right to your door. Just choose your meals and select their delivery date. HelloFresh handles all the meal planning, shopping and most of the prep, so all you have to do is open your box and get cookin’. Plus deliver limited time seasonal recipes from HelloFresh: Taste of Summer series, like old base shrimp and sausage or grilled steak, lettuce wraps and so much more. And just to let all you Myrtle Beach know, when you order stuff from HelloFresh, it saves you a lot of time, and it’s easy to make these recipes with everything that they’ve sent you and what you want to eat. And man, they’ve sent me some stuff several times, and this stuff is good, and it’s just easy for you to do, and it’s healthy for you. Go to hellofresh.com/dispatchesapps for free appetizers for life. One appetizer item per box while a subscription is active. That’s free appetizers for life at hellofresh.com/dispatchesapps. HelloFresh, America’s number one meal kit. Why do you want to learn a new language? Maybe you have an upcoming international trip, want to connect with a family member or friend, or just want to learn a new skill, or own a new hobby? In comes Rosetta Stone, the most trusted language learning program available on desktop or as an app. It’s truly immerses you in the language you want to learn. They use trusted experts for 30 years with millions of users and 25 languages offered. Some of which include Spanish, French, German, Korean, Chinese, Japanese, Dutch and Arabic. Rosetta Stone immerses you in many ways. There are no English translations so you really learn to speak, listen and think in that language. It’s designed for a long-term retention. Plus, they have convenient desktop and app options with audio companion, and the ability to download lessons offline, all for an amazing value. A lifetime membership has all 25 languages for any and all languages needed in life. That’s lifetime access to all 25 language courses Rosetta Stone offers for 50% off. A steal. Don’t put off learning that language. There’s no better time than right now to get started. For a limited time, “Dispatches From Myrtle Beach” listeners can get Rosetta Stone’s lifetime membership for 50% off. Visit rosettastone.com/dispatches. That’s 50% off unlimited access to 25 language courses for the rest of your life. Redeem your 50% off at rosettastone.com/dispatches today. It’s time for another edition of, “Don’t Tell Nana.” Link, be as we talking about being naked, Yeah. And drying off. Okay. I got a email from Paul and he asked me, have you ever streak? Well, I’m willing to bet you have, Dad. But let’s hear it. Yeah. And it, you know, it’s been a pretty good while ago, and believe the song came out, Ray Steven’s song came out in 1973, “The Streak.” “Don’t look at them.” Yeah. And we were- I’m familiar. When I was in college at Sand Hills Community College, one of my best friends, Tommy Haskin, we were in a big party for the school down there, and they played that song. And I looked at Tom and I said, “Hell, this would be a good time to get naked and streak around the campus, wouldn’t it?” And he said, “Sound like a deal to me.” Me and him went right out the door, took all our clothes off, and this place had windows all around it, all the way around it. Okay. It’s a pretty good sized building. And me and him, we didn’t run too hard. We just kinda lolly gagged and run around, run all the way around the building. And they was all kinds of people at the windows are watching and looking. And me and him just got around the building and went back over there and picked our clothes up and put ’em back on and come on back inside like we ain’t never done nothing. And I said, “Well, y’all miss it. Y’all was playing the streak and we streak.” They said, “Yes, y’all did.” They didn’t miss it. So you said you lolly gagged around. I mean, is there an optimal speed for streaking? Can you streak too fast is what I’m asking? Well, yes, you don’t. Hey, you got to do it at a pace where, you know, people can watch and see what you’re doing. Of course, if you’re doing it like some of them people do it on national TV, they’re trying to do it in a hurry so the police can’t get- Right. Get ’em, but where we was at, we weren’t worried about no policing. We were just proud and just running around, so- Is there, ’cause if you go too fast, there’s a concern of floppage. Yes and jingling, and your little testicles hitting back and forth. And you might get injured, so you don’t wanna do that. About little testicles? What you talking about, “Your little testicles”? Speak for yourself. Yeah. Well. Like that thing on people’s desks where it’s like, you know about that? Like, yeah. Well, out here it’s the thing where it hangs on the hitch on your bumper, and they clang back and forth. Yeah. Truck nuts. I’ve seen those. Truck nuts. So you don’t wanna go too fast ’cause you don’t want the cathedral bells to be clanging. But you also don’t want to go too slow ’cause you want there to be right. You want there to- A little bit of- Blur. Yeah. Yeah. That’s right. You wanna have some blur, like you wanna create that natural blur down there. Yep. Right? Well, they can’t, you know, leave a little bit to their imagination. There you go. So you’re hitting this sweet spot of speed somewhere between the bang and the blur. Yep, that’s correct. Is the sweet spot, okay. Of course, that’s been a long time ago. Let’s see. ’74, ’84, ’94, 2004. That’s been 50 years ago. 50 years ago. All right. ‘Cause the older you get, the more dangle you got, right? I mean, everything tends to, gravity takes its toll everywhere. Yeah, and then sometimes when you get older, sometimes it kinda like jumping in a cold creek or something, and it drawing up in there so you know. It can go the other way too. So, you know, if you don’t use it, you might lose it. Don’t plan on that. That’s some quite good advice there. If you’re looking to streak, take Charles Neal’s advice. Somewhere between the clanging and the blur is your proper dangle. Yeah, you might want to just do that, in this day and age, if you’re just having a party somewhere- Mm-hmm. And you going to do it, you might wanna just do that right around your house so you don’t get locked up. So- Okay. Be careful in this day and age about running around naked ’cause they might come and get you. All right. Might come and get you. You didn’t hear it from us, is what he’s saying. That’s right. Yeah. It’s time for another edition of “Y’all Need to Look At This Paint.” Well, Link, I got another question and it’s from Lionell and Jamie. Oh, double up. “My son Owen, who is eight, wants his room painted bright orange and then I feel an accent wall would make it not so “I’m in your face” bright. Mm-hmm. But I don’t wanna go with white. What color would you suggest to go with the orange? Okay. Oh, and I sent you some orange colors, but any, if you wanna just do one color on a wall for his orange, I’d probably do it for his bed’s at, in the backside of his bed and all that. Oh, so you actually have a recommendation for the orange first? Yeah. Well let’s hear that. Walk me through. Tell me what each one of these is called. Obstinate orange, invigorate and raucous orange. So they’re all like, well, invigorate seems positive, but obstinate, that’s when you won’t take direction. That’s when you won’t mind your parents. You’re obstinate. Yeah. And raucus, that’s when you can’t be controlled. So I think there’s some hidden meaning from a parent’s perspective in these. So there’s something to this. Yeah, we put obstinate orange on our child’s wall because they don’t listen to anything we say. But which one is your pick? My pick was the invigorate orange all. Okay. Alright. That’s the positive one. Maybe that’ll give some good vibes. But they wanted to know- But the other- The other color. The other thing, you need to just go pick you a nice gray color ’cause gray will tone the orange down. And to use it, and I mean there’s thousands of grays. And paint those other three walls gray, and it won’t be, when you walk into the room, it won’t be like, “Oh, my God. This whole room’s orange.” It’ll be a nice focal point for Owen, and he gets something he wants and then you get something that you can kinda deal with and knowing what’s going on in his room, so- ‘Cause what do you think, what kind of effect would a raucous orange on all four walls have on a 8-year-old boy? I mean, what do you think that’s gonna do to him, behaviorally? Bright colors make you have a lot more emotions come out, and the way you act and different things too. It might be too much to handle parents. Yeah. So you need to limit it to one wall. That’s a good idea. And then gray it up, gray up the rest. You gotta keep this kid in line. Tell him, you know, if he needs some energy, he can face the orange. And then, most of the time, you get him face the other way. Yeah, that’s the reason I said paint it behind his headboard so when he goes to sleep, he can’t see it that much. See, we got some psychology working today. I love it. Yeah. So Lionell and Jamie, that’s about as good as I can do for getting you orange and you paint the other walls a gray color. And I agree with you, you don’t need to paint ’em white. It needs to be something like a gray or maybe even a tan color where it tones that orange down and not like you walking into the sunshine all the time. There you go. Now dad, I just want to reiterate now, you don’t let that blow dryer get too close to your goodies ’cause it’ll burn. You’re gonna hate me. That sounds like personal experience. Oh yeah, definitely. You wanna keep it at night. Do you have a button on your dryer that will send a cold blast? A cold blast or a hot blast? A cold blast. You make it hot, but then there’s like a button that like- No, Uh-uh. No ours has got a button on it where, if you hit the button, it gets a little hotter. Oh really? Yeah. Well, don’t use that. If you had a cold blast, sometimes you might need to blast them with some cold. But I mean, I don’t wanna build it up too much and I know I already have, but Dad, I just think that you’re never gonna go back. I think, I mean, just the ways that I’ve enriched your life with all of my thoughtful techniques. I just gotta tell it. I gotta tell you, you were reaping the benefits of having a wonderful son. Well, thoughtful and not weird at all. Wait and see, the next time we get together, I may have a little something for you to let you know how it went with me with the dryer drying off. And your body is so damn hairy. That’s what I’m saying. There is no way that a towel is getting you dry enough, it’s not. Everywhere that you’ve got hair, you need to be- I’m afraid though, if I’ve been dry with a dryer, mine will be just blowed out and frizzed up like a- Yeah. That’s true. You look like a dog just came from the groomer. Yeah. Hey, that’s good. That’s nice. That’s nice Dad. That’s what you want. You want it to fluff. You gonna take it dry to another level. Yeah. Well, if it’s good for you, it might be good for me too, then it might not. Sometimes, it’s my favorite part of the day. Oh Lord, boy, you got a lot to look forward to then, ain’t you? Every morning. But you might need to get a new dryer with a cold blast. Okay. Start with a proper distance, you know? Don’t get too cocky. Oh, I’m not. Okay. Alright. I’ll be careful. All right. I’ll be thinking about you. Well, Linky, was fun having all of y’all here with us today. And we’ll be back next week for another one. And don’t forget to follow and subscribe, we ever get your podcast and on YouTube. And while you’re at it, rate and review us on Apple Podcast. And if you got a question, comment, or story you’d like to share with me, email me at ratherbshaggin53@aol.com. And y’all have a great rest of the week, and we can’t wait to wrestle your whiskers again next time with the blow dry. Oh, that’s right. Woo. Dry ’em off. Yeah. I love you dad. And I’m so proud of your openness and curiosity, always learn something new. Yep. LOL. Yeah, laugh out loud. Lots of love. Lots of love, that’s right. Love you, I’ll see you later. LOL you too.