ramble [Music] [Applause] [Music] this is dispatches from myrtle beach with my son link neal from good mythical morning i hope y’all having some good times looking to the podcast and we’re going to swing right onto this one and see what we can get into today hey dad hey course you didn’t introduce yourself well this is uh charles neal from dispatches from myrtle beach and uh with my son link neal from good mythical morning and uh we’re gonna swing right into the show and see what we can get into today okay felt like a do-over that’s cool yeah i got introduced twice i like that all right swinging into it how hard you’ve been swinging lately been swinging pretty hard it’s been hot and start going to work early in the morning i’m painting outside right now so okay you’re trying to get done by what before it gets too hot well it it gets a hot that the paint starts to lap up outside so you have to quit that’s a good excuse it’s a good professional excuse for having to quit the paint laps up i don’t know what that means but it sounds technical it means when you go from one side to the next and time you get up to the next side it’s not smoothing out and looking good so you have to quit because i want it to look good and then what are you doing when you’re getting home if it’s like one o’clock in the afternoon two o’clock what are you doing then i usually go in and uh take all them wet sweaty clothes off and take a shower and go in there and sit down and recliner and take me a nap a nice recliner nap see i don’t own a recliner but every time i’m in a recliner the first thing i think is why don’t i own a recliner i mean i’m of the age right i mean what what’s the minimum age to own a recliner uh you you weigh past that what is that supposed to mean you’re over 40 so you weigh past when you already had a recliner but okay hey as good as you like that couch you got at your house and i’ve seen you laying on it and then you’ve seen me laying on it it lays pretty good too so you know yes that’s just up to you when you want to get a recliner yeah the problem is i i have to consult with somebody you know i have to get buy-in before i buy in or on a recliner do you know what i’m getting at here yeah i know exactly what you’ll see but i didn’t have to worry about that nancy ordered this recliner for me she likes it too cause she’ll go in there at night for i i’ll go to bed a lot of times she’ll go in there and her in gypsy or she sitting there watching tv and she’s in there in that recliner and then she’s in out of orbit somewhere most of the time till about one o’clock in the morning so do y’all fight over the recliner absolutely not no and she if she’s sitting in it when i come home she’ll actually say i’m gonna get up where you can sit down and and rest some but that is love you know somebody loves you when they’ll get up out of the recliner for you absolutely i’m telling you in terms of vibe i just can’t picture a recliner in our house i mean christy does a great job with the aesthetic like matter of fact when uh your grand girls my nieces came and visited like when they walked in the house first thing they said was this is a model house and i was like yeah christy does a good job everywhere you look like everything seems like it could be in a magazine oh yeah you know you get your recliner and put it upstairs in your bedroom and then you’d have one pointing over there where you could sit down and rest and end up there too she you been in our bedroom it looks like a magazine too oh yeah you look in these magazines you’re not gonna see a recliner that i mean it’s just that’s not what they’re doing these days it’s wrong it’s wrong you know what we need to get more recliners in some bougie decor magazines like this should be our thing i mean we should at least get a recliner sponsor you know i’m telling don’t say the brand of your recliner because whatever sponsor we get that’s going gonna be the brand and you’re gonna get a second one you and nancy gonna have your own i don’t know to brando but i’d have to ask nancy what she ordered because she ordered it a specific color kind of like what christy does to match some pictures the uh living room in there so you know it’s red isn’t it no it’s green i knew it was a bright color the couch is that big couch sectional sofa thing we got it’s red christmas year-round in your living room you know how nancy likes red all our vehicles are red everything except for the golf cart it ain’t red which comes first the recliner or the golf cart yeah the golf cart came first here yes that’s called beach priorities or belch priorities that’s right so give me a dispatch tell me tell me what else is new i went out to get some coffee at the kangaroo the other day the gas station yeah the gas station okay that’s where you get your coffee yeah and uh i walked up there and told it and was just talking like i’m talking right now and that boy said i can talk southern too he i said you can i said can you do it and be on a podcast yes he said what do you mean be on a podcast i said well me and my son’s on a podcast and uh he said you know you look kind of familiar and i said i just said have you ever heard anybody named link and he said oh my god rhett and link that’s on good mythical morning is your dad and i said that would be absolutely correct i didn’t have to ask anything christian then won’t be mad and he said can i take a picture of you and he he jerked his phone up and then he just stayed on that side of the counter and i was on the other side he took a picture and his name is jay oh is that a holler out yeah jay’s a big fan of a good mythical morning and he said he was going to be a fan and go home and when he got off of work and listen to the podcast did you remember the name of the podcast yeah i told him it was dispatches from myrtle beach and i said it’d rather be shagging 53 at aol.com told him all of that i love it dad so this is turning the corner because now you weren’t even recognized at first you were just talking about he was commenting on your accent yep and then you turned that into a one-on-one promo for this show that is most necessary yes we got to have more organic promo we got to have you going everywhere and just saying do you know who i am i have a podcast that’s right i did that with a friend of mine down the street one day this uh in the entertainment entertainment industry and he said well will i we’ll have to check that out sometime so he has a radio show right down here oh really 94.9 so he’s our old school competition yep he’s going to listen and we’ll see what he thinks about it yeah that’s what he said yeah you know i was thinking of one of my fondest memories of the two of us and when you said radio it it reminded me of it again when we were invited on the john boyne billy show rhett and i were and i took you with me yep yeah you remember that right so um yeah we our our videos were starting to pop online maybe for a couple of years i think this might have been i don’t know it might have been 2009 by this point and um so we were invited on you know like every morning going to high school i would listen to john boy and billy they’re still doing it right oh they still doing it i still listen to them some down here on the mornings and every summer when i would work with you painting houses we would listen to it and there’d be certain points where it’s like all right they’re about they’re about to do this skit we got to stay in the car you know we would like sometimes and robert d rayford would come on there and like oh yeah sometimes like well we got to wait to work a little bit we got to listen to this and it was like you know we would just we would just cackle and laugh and connect over listening to these guys so then years later when i’m like this was the first like we’re getting internet famous enough that i think it started to click with you and i’m like hey dad guess where i’m going the john boyne billy show and john boy also invited us to hang out at his house and then i was like do you want to come and i said yeah yep so we went to his house and we also went to his uh farm one time too where there was all them guys that was cooking and doing stuff out there it was a blast we were like grilling out doing some doing a little bit of drinking yep doing a lot of a lot of joking i remember that john boy had this friend he was like this guy who would like just he just came out of the woods from like a neighboring thing like once he like heard our trucks drive up or something and then he we were hanging out there basically all night and at a certain point this guy started making some jokes i was like i i can’t i don’t i don’t even know if i can repeat it on good mythical evening i’ll just say that he was talking about his experience holding on to a plow behind a mule and it’s looking at the back of a of a female mule and like the thoughts that he had from that vantage point were so disturbing that i have do you remember those jokes i kind of remembered i don’t well it scarred me man i don’t you must i think you must have wiped it from your memory as much as you like a dirty joke that was a bit much yeah he was a little out in left field after he of course i think he’d had a drink of t2 so he was definitely yeah but it was that was a thrilling experience you know because it was like the first time i don’t know i don’t you feel like that was the first time you were like wow it’s like my son is getting some sort of famous there’s some sort of attention happening here you know yeah you would you were getting some notoriety about stuff so it it was starting to percolate for you you and rhett some i’m telling you it sure was holler out to john boy and billy yeah and the candy guy to kangaroo what was his name again jay good keep promoting the podcast okay will it’s time for another edition of myrtle beach mailbag i got one from scott bordos what does a robot do after sex so is this a regular robot or a sex robot because it’s like whenever you talk about artificial intelligence you know that’s what we end up thinking about it’s like all right when is it when is the sex robot gonna start happening these are the questions that i start to ask but let’s start with your question let’s just answer that one first what does a robot say after sex what does a robot do after sex oh okay what he nuts and bolts [Laughter] okay he nuts and bolts [Laughter] what’s he running from i don’t know he’s done he’s ready to go somewhere else what are your thoughts on the ethics of sex robots i don’t have much thought on a sex robot i i don’t i don’t see how that that’s beneficial to the robot or anybody else cause i mean they ain’t human and they ain’t got no feelings so i mean so i like i like this you’re looking at it the ethics from the robot’s perspective what is the robot really getting out of it if he’s having sex with something i mean you have to program that into him don’t you so i mean right they’re going to get real intelligent and then they’re going to be having sex with each other and then they might charge us to watch they won’t be charging me to watch you’re not interested no okay well let’s see i got another email from heather rager what do you call a lesbian dinosaur okay oh lordy what do you call a lesbian dinosaur i don’t even know if i can pronounce this let’s see uh like a lot of puss [Laughter] look a lot of us look alike hey that doesn’t have to be a lesbian don’t limit that to lesbians good gracious well i agree with you don’t let don’t don’t let i mean don’t let them have all the fun right i’m glad they’re having fun but uh let me in on it i’d like to study this look a lot of us [Laughter] the faster you say it the more you can get away with it dad you are saying it pretty slow see if you can speed it up a little bit like a lot of us that’s it even faster though like a lot of us yeah like right there you go like if there’s kids around you know if you’re at a natural history museum and you want to like lean over to somebody and tell that joke i think it should be you know what dinosaur that i relate to the most that way you leave lesbians out of it you know what dinosaur i most relate to and you tell them look a lot of us all right say it fast and the kids won’t know what’s up i got another email from savannah piers well let’s not go on top of the last one i don’t know said what’s the difference between a tire and 365 used condoms i don’t know what is the difference between a tire and 365 use condoms one’s a good year and the other’s a great year [Laughter] that is a high frequency well if you use it that much it probably gets a tough you can’t feel nothing like a like a stick of beef jerky will you get calluses on your head god don’t say that talk to me about doing dick callus is that even a thing i guess it could be at skin yeah [Music] custom ink can help you recognize employees show customer 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just blaming the next person beside me might cause a problem how do you even do that at a funeral how do you know you’re like he did it he farted like what do you i mean i don’t even understand the option you know i mean once you find it it’s already out no meaning i guess you could give him a dirty look maybe you know people are looking at you and you’re like looking at the guy next to you i guess that’s how you would do it try to play it off something but that that’s a good one uh lonnie but you you know you might need a little help with besides you know trying to blame it on somebody else and just you know own on up to that yourself and that’s right it’s kind of like if the preacher says anybody in here got to say something and he said you just stand up and say well i was the one farted i’m sorry it would be pretty pretty unclassy to be to say yeah i got something to say the guy next to me farted when it was you that’s right lonnie on up to it and you know what you should feel even worse this is coming from a guy who unapologetically farts from walking one side of the room all the way exiting out the other side of the room good god almighty [Music] yeah i got it honest you didn’t get none of that oh i got some of that trust me but not in a funeral man not at a funeral okay i i got one from brian d he he wants to know and this is kind of just for me but you you can join in on this one too i think it says what’s the dumbest way you’ve ever been hurt oh first of all i love this question it’s more it’s like more of a personal question i like this i was thinking about this and this has been many years ago okay and uh before i was ever married anything and when i was kind of in my wild days and i we were sitting at the supper table at mom and daddy’s house and i was about 18 years old maybe 19 or something a car drove up and somebody knocked on the door and it’s one of my friends and said this was about seven o’clock at night just pretty early he said they fighting across the river so i just got up and went with him and went over and just joined in the fight over there well he wanted a really smart thing to do because i i got i ended up getting hit in the back of the head with a crowbar and took about 27 stitches to sew it up what what who is they uh my friends and some friends they were from anderson crete and we was we didn’t get along too well so they were some mean boys so so the lilington crew yep and they were fighting long enough for your friend to leave drive across the river to your house tell you they’re fighting it took about 30 minutes and they were still up we still over there fighting so i got to fighting with them and then i i got got hit hey i got laid out so yeah it was a crowbar it wasn’t good so what in the world when i come to i said you know i always stayed at home just kept eating so that’s probably one of the dumbest things i’ve ever done did you yeah did you come to i’ve never heard this story this is crazy did you come to in the hospital no i come to right there and one of my friends were kind of trying to wake me up i really want to make sure i want dead yeah and uh that’s when i had a 66 chevy 2 super sport so he gave me a title and he said are you gonna be all right and i said yeah i’ll be all right so i just got in the car and drove myself to the hospital over it done got sowed up then they wouldn’t let me drive they knew who my daddy was at the sheriff’s department then and they called him said you need to come up here and get your son we’re not going to let him drive home he’s lost her right smarter blood and he said and he’s not going to stay in the hospital i’m telling you you refused yeah too many robots yeah that’d been a good day to be a robot where i could just put somebody else’s head up just nuttin bolt i got a another email from angela jones did you hear about the woman who tried to cut her husband’s penis off but missed and got his thigh instead no you know to answer your question no dad i have not heard about the woman who tried to cut her husband’s penis off but missed and cut his thigh instead she said she was charged with a mr wiener you you picked some good ones this week man nice time for our almost sponsor mutiny bay miniteur golf on 301 us 17 north myrtle beach south carolina 29582 is the email address is paradise adventuregolf.com and i’ve been there with some of my grandchildren and we went and played miniature golf we had a good time and it’s a good place to go and enjoy yourself and do things with your kids and then if you get a hole in one on a special golf thing they give you a a trophy and uh last week i didn’t go with my uh camera my grandson went with a couple other guys and both of them got a hole in one and both of them got trophies so it’s a good thing to do and besides that one there’s a lot of different uh miniature golf courses down here so if you ever down here at myrtle beach and just swing on by and come up to mutiny bay miniature golf and get you some clubs and of course you go out to pay but uh just get you some club and just have a good time and enjoy yourself hey link i kind of come up with the idea kind of like when we were doing the thing where i was talking like i was your daughter and coming up with some ideas said do you remember us doing that you know we could just go back and forth with one another okay i do remember i got you to play lily and i played well i guess myself so we like we role played on on good mother good morning yeah so you okay you want to do some more role play yeah we’re going to do some more role plays yes all right i love it i love this idea it’s time for our first edition of let’s roll play what do you want to do one of the things i thought about have you ever been stuck in the elevator uh no but i have thought about it i mean pretty much every time i get in an elevator i think about what if this thing gets stuck have you oh i’ve been stuck in one but let me ask you something if you ever got stuck in an elevator and you was in a uh colonoscopy’s doctor’s office what what would we talk about then oh dad this is okay this is this is genius okay uh uh mission mission accepted challenge accepted all right so we’re in the elevator action hey how’s it going oh it’s going good you know we’re uh stuck in this elevator oh is it uh is it stuck i just thought it hadn’t started moving yet are you serious push the push the door open button you’re closer to it i’m pushing and it’s not going anywhere it kind of when we were going down it kind of stopped so you know this i reckon let’s hit this button over here where where the telephone’s at and see call it what happens yeah yeah and call and get somebody see if they can come get us out and everything because i i i got a certain time i supposed to be downstairs to get my procedure done i don’t want to miss this so i had to come back again for the for this colonoscopy man look at that red button it’s so blurry i can’t even see it to push it it keeps moving man i’m disoriented did is the elevator still stuck i don’t know what’s going on well it’s stuck and i well i don’t have anything for you to drink so you know we’re gonna have to just try to get some help quick as we can i’m not thirsty but my butt feels funny oh man this is crazy where are my glasses the glasses is on your head you you must still be knocked out from that anastasia son waiting to get ready to go home i’m having a vision that i’m in a stuck elevator with a complete stranger my butt feels funny man what’s your name my name’s charles what’s your name you remember what your name is heidi hobby yeah i think call me heidi like heidi heidi ho you don’t look like a hider to me let me get on this telephone up here and see if i can get us some help tell them that the elevator’s stuck yeah man you’re in for a treat some sort of they put something in your veins and then all of a sudden last thing i i vaguely remember to put i guess it was a camera up my butt oh yeah it was it’s amazing you’re going to love it if we ever get down there i don’t want to love it i i’m hoping i’m all the way asleep for i don’t know what they sticking up my butt i hope i don’t have the same doctor you do no it’s just a twilight man i remember now i mean it was a very shiny shiny ceiling it’s very cold in there they had to pry apart my butt cheeks and shove some sort of camera in there does that sound like a good time sounds like a good time for you i i’m hoping all the way out enough that i don’t i don’t remember them doing my butt cheeks up and sticking something up my tail i don’t want to remember any of it all right call call the people man call them hello we’re stuck in the elevator we’re stuck in the elevator and we got on the phone and they don’t nobody answering hello hello um yes i’m listening we’re stuck in the elevator i don’t know what floor we’re in between but we’re stuck in the elevator we need we need some help this guy here he’s already had his procedure done and he’s acting kind of strange i need some help getting this idea elevated i’m good it’s great um well have you did you drink all of the liquids the night before have you passed all of your solids are you cleaned out sir oh yeah we you better hope we’re cleaned out and it don’t something don’t happen to hit and we have to fill this elevator up again i’m telling you i think that may be the problem i think um you the you may be underweight if you’re both completely cleaned out we really don’t care if we’re underweight or overweight i just want to get out i don’t like being stuck in this elevator whether i’m having a colonoscopy or not so need some help to get us down i think it’s going to take about eight hours that’s fine hey we can just hang out charles you seem like a great guy you know you know what i can do it you know what just bend over i’ll take a look i i’m not gonna hang out in the elevator for eight hours so you but if you don’t call i’m just gonna get my cell phone and i’m gonna call 911 had a fire department come to get me out of this elevator and then we’re like eight hours later man charles it sure has been great getting to know you thanks for allowing me to sober up i’m glad you don’t have any polyps yeah so now i guess we i you you’ve got to do yours and i’m gonna have to come back another day and get my no i took care of it for you i took care you’re totally clean in there oh okay totally fine yep so you’re good to go i’m good to go and look the doors are opening i just saved you a copay see that’s called a happy ending yeah that was weird is that what you were you were hoping this would be oh yeah it worked out pretty good yeah good work i like it role play well we’ve had a pretty good show today i think we have before we end today’s episode i want to let you know about the new upcoming season of trevor talks too much okay go yeah we’ll go for it host and mythical kitchen soft boy trevor evarts is kicking this season off with a special solo episode that you want to miss you want to miss it you called him a soft boy i’m so sad a solo episode that you want to miss all right don’t listen to that one he’s going to love this ad trevor everest is kicking this season off with a special solo episode that you won’t want to miss oh yeah the new season drops tuesday august tonight so be sure to follow and subscribe and while you’re there check out season one of trevor talks too much where he talks to his favorite musicians influencers and gamers about just about anything available anywhere you get your podcast wow dad thanks for that promo push another mythical podcast you gonna listen to it uh i might listen to it i ain’t gonna tell you i might probably not ah all right whoa i’ve had a good time everything you say is refreshing to me dad well i just hope everybody keeps watching and if you need to send us some emails and stuff just rather be shagging 53 at all.aol.com and dispatches from myrtle beach and just keep listening and we’re going to try to have a good time and just uh swing you around and just see what we can get into and just enjoy one another i can’t wait for it i i know i can’t wait i’ll be you know it’ll be here before you know it yeah you’re telling me all right see you next week dad love you okay love you [Music] [Music] too you