EB 221: Our Top 10 Moments Of 2019

Welcome to Ear Biscuits. I’m Rhett. And I’m Link. This week at the Round Table of Dim Lighting, man, we’re gonna look back at our year, the year that was 2019, and we have each independently ranked our top 10 moments, 10. Most meaningful moments/experiences/happenings, of the year. I would like to refrain from using the term meaningful because I’m gonna go with Okay. Meaningful is a part of it, but I’m gonna go with memorable, because it was the 10 that I could remember. Oh. And so I have a feeling There maybe more. Either while you’re sharing your top 10 or vice versa, or just later, oh, yeah, I should have made my top 10, so, I don’t like to make anything definitive or comprehensive because I am a, I’m a human prone to error. And faulty memory recall. So, it sounds like you’re Judging. Yeah, well, it sounds like you’re almost pre-apologizing that, for someone that you will have forgotten to be grateful for. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I mean, Like, as if– Yeah, I mean, I’m not really doing that, but that’s probably my instinct. And also, I feel like the order is pretty, Yeah, it’s difficult. Like the ordering was difficult. I don’t know. Arbitrary? It’s not arbitrary. Yeah. There’s a general rhyme or reason as to why I put them in this order. But, if I start thinking about it a whole lot more, they’ll start switching around and, Yeah. Who knows what’ll happen? I am very grateful that we did this last year. So we did the 2019 ver, no, 2018 version. Last year’s 2018. Now we’re about to do to the 2019 version. Usually every year, they go about one number of the years. It was a rewarding experience having this conversation last year. I anticipate this will be a rewarding experience because putting this list together was rewarding for me, because it, it forced me to do something that, it actually takes a lot of work. Like I went back through my photos and, to jog my memory, and went back through my, my notes that I had taken, like my Evernote journal. And I actually looked at my– What– I looked at my calendar, I really tried to be– I didn’t look at the calendar but, I did think that, man, if I took a lot of pictures of something like that– Which we’ve discussed. That is definitely one, If anything’s Again, I, Worth remembering I have at least one picture of it. this is a good reason. I don’t even, I don’t even, like to think about it too much. Because, I think one of the– You’re stressing about it. One of the themes that, oh, no, actually this is a, this is a theme that kind of I uncovered as I thought through this is that man, it’s like the vast majority of the experience that you have with a particular moment in your life will be in the memory of that moment, right? Yeah. So, by far, right? Because something happens and it happens one time, But you can remember it. One night, but you will re-access that memory for the rest of your life. Hopefully, if it’s good. And it just strikes me as man, it really is, it really is about the memory. But the memories that, for me the thing that I kind of realized is like, this year, you know what, I’m not even gonna say it. It’s about being in the moment, and it’s like, I started realizing that, I was sometimes and I wasn’t sometimes. Okay. I think that contributed to my order. Well, let’s get into it. But we should get into it because we got 10. Let’s just start. We’re also doing this with no headphones for those of you listening, And I don’t like it. If we’re talking in a different volume. I knew you would hate it. I don’t– I knew you would hate it. I feel like I like the way it feels. But I’m, again, I’m giving it a good shot. I think I have a theory as why you like it, but I’m not gonna say what it is because, you know, it’s not about that. Seems like, yeah, it’s a, it’s like you’re looking down your nose at me, man. No, I feel like, What’s your number 10s? Well if you have on headphones you feel like you’re in a little bit more control, and you feel a little bit less in control without– I’m floating, I’m in space! and that’s difficult for you. What’s your number 10 most memorable moment of 2019? After many years of not being able to do this, I was able to put on a firework show on July 4th in North Carolina. And as I’ve discussed before, this was a big part of my July 4th celebrations in the past. I nearly killed my brother-in-law one time and also a random teen girl. I set a field on fire and required a friend to come out of nowhere with a fire extinguisher. You know– These are all in the past. But it’s 2019. I’ve almost put myself in the freelance fireworks Hall of Fame several times, but, and then coming out to California you can’t do fireworks because the whole place is just tinder ready to go up in flames at any moment. So going back to North Carolina, on the beach, on a dock in the Sound, and I had my father-in-law, send someone to buy a crap ton of, very illegal fireworks, to just put on a patriotic display of awesomeness for my family. And to be able to do it with my kids, for the first time, put them in a little danger as well, because they don’t get to be very, in a lot of danger here in the very safe Southern California, so, that was cool. That was cool. It was really cool. Cool makes it to number 10 on your list. And you talked about this in a previous Ear Biscuit. I did. So, and I’m actually curious as we go through our list, how many of the things that made our top 10, have we already shared on Ear Biscuits? And if so that makes me feel good because it means that like, the most meaningful things in our lives we’re already sharing with you. There’s very little if any that I haven’t shared. Spoiler alert. Yeah, my number 10 is way back in January. And I believe we devoted an entire episode to talking about my Spartan Race. Ah, yes. And our like, our our most, historic, physical, accomplishments, achievements. Mm-hmm, mm-hmm. And so from a physical, accomplishment standpoint, I always got, it was a peak for me. Ever since then I’ve just been living in the shadow of my, of what a specimen I was. I’ve never– You didn’t do another one. There was a lot of talk about doing more. I think I’m– You even had the little medal that was just a piece of metal, and you had to do three in two years. Well you had to do three to get like this super medal. Yeah. I’m gonna sign up. Well, you still got a coupla weeks. You know what I’m, I’ve decided that I’m gonna sign up for another so, another race, something or other. And, you know, just gear up my training. It really makes a difference. It’s not, it’s about the journey. It’s not just about the destination, which by the way, was at the finish line, completely intact. But, only by a thread. But I think about it a lot. I think about it a lot. It was, yeah, you think about it more than you did it. That’s what I’m saying. Yeah, yeah, I only did it once. I think about it all the time. Yeah. I need to do it more often– You better do the right thing so you can think about the right thing. So that’s the moral of the story. What’s your, what’s your number nine? Some of these late, like once you get to the top of the list, I think I’m going to unpack some of these more, especially since that was a whole episode. I’m not gonna talk about it any more. All right. Go back and listen to that episode. If you want to. Number, number nine for me, was throwing out the first pitch at the Dodgers game. Oh, that didn’t, that was not on my list. But it was cool. I was there for that. I also feel– I put this on the list, not because in the, again, in the moment. I wasn’t like, “I’m having the time of my life. “This is a childhood dream come true,” ’cause it’s not really. Throwing out a first pitch is something that I imagined might happen at some point, but it wasn’t something that I look forward to. But it’s pretty cool that we got to do it. And it’s Yeah And, so, that’s why I put it on the list ’cause it seems like it should be on the list. I mean, you, I’m not gonna say you weren’t nervous. You weren’t anxious. There’s a word that I can’t come up with that you were more than me about that. I could tell that like, and maybe it’s more that like, the sportsmanshipness that, of yourself, that’s, I don’t really have. Yeah– I could tell it was, I got a real kick out of it. But I could tell it meant more to you. Well, it’s like maybe the equivalent is you know, when I had the opportunity to, a coupla years ago with Locke and his father/son three point contest thing that I think I talked about Yeah. That we get to do in his basketball league, it’s like, you present me with an opportunity to do something to display my abilities, I take it very seriously. And I actually was pretty damn disappointed in my performance. My pitch basically bounced and I’m going to blame it on my bum shoulder, but I you know, I just was, I actually was kind of disappointed in myself, which is I lit, I realized, I’m literally the only person on earth who’s disappointed in me, no one cares about it. No one in this, Yeah, I was, No one understands, I was proud of us. Because no one– The flights of our balls was in total unison. Yeah, yeah. And they criss-crossed. Hey, yours might have hit the dirt a little bit, but that’s not for me to say. But it was a special, it was a special moment and it kind of, you know, it’s one of those moments that you can be like, all right, we’ve done enough for someone to think that we should throw out the pitch at a baseball game. Yeah. At a major league baseball game. And then went on to not go to the World Series. Right, that was your fault. It’s not our fault. Maybe your fault. Mine didn’t hit the dirt! Mine hit the meat. You know what, I think it was your, I think your catcher was just more, I think he just reached further. My number nine is my Thailand trip. Are you surprised that’s not higher on my list? I’m sorry, your number nine? Yeah. It’s my number nine, yeah. I don’t know. It’s weird, like, now I’m gonna talk about why it wasn’t that great of a trip or something. It was a really great trip. It was a very ambitious trip. And it was it was very special. But compared to the other things on my list, it was just, it was a very ambitious and well executed vacation. But it kind, in my mind, it just kinda was, and it, I mean, it was a privilege to be able to travel that far and to see so many places and to me the big takeaway was that, as a family we did it. It felt like an accomplishment. And I don’t mean in like, “Oh, we, you know, we travel.” I guess I kinda do. We mobilized as the Neal’s, we executed this, this trip and we made it out alive. You executed the trip is a strange way to think about it. Is that how you think about things? It was just it was also very stressful. I think that’s, that’s the thing that pushes it down. Because it was ambitious, it was, it was stressful for me and like I’m, I’m still coming to grips with how I can really enjoy an ambitious trip, with lots of moving parts, moved around to three different places, saw a bunch of ruins, made a lot of great memories. But I think in the, in the grand scheme of things, and in the scheme of my list, I don’t think it changed me as much as the other things on my list, including other trips that I took. And that’s how I evaluated it. We had a really good time, our view of the world was expanded. I think that it baked something into the kids that I didn’t have as a kid, which was not just an Internet awareness of how big the world is, but a physical awareness and I think that’s really valuable. So I’ll add that to the list. It’s on the list. I mean, I’m not saying I didn’t have a good time. I thought it would have been higher myself. Okay, yeah, because I’m not gonna, I mean– It’s my number nine. My big trip, it’s a lot higher up on my list. Okay. That’s all I’ll say. But, okay, but your trip was also, it had this built, it had this, It was. Not so many layers of meaning and family. We’ll get into it. I mean, you’ll get into it. Yeah, you’ll get into it. What’s your number eight? My number eight, now, first of all, this is another thing that I started thinking about when I was putting together my list. So much of this is trips, Right. Which I think, ’cause this next one is my Mexico trip with Jessie that happened earlier in the year. The one where I took the infamous watermelon suit portrait. Oh. That boots, completely blew up Instagram. I mean, Instagram hasn’t been the same since I put on that matching short sleeve shirt and shorts bathing suit. I think you’re I think you’re conflating it with when I put on that watermelon outfit And it was way too big for you. In my backyard, and relaunched my Instagram, which should have made my list. That must, that’s my number 11. You can’t do that, no. My number 11 was I relaunched my Instagram. But I did think that I’m having it. Again, I don’t know why I’m struggling with the way that I’m processing this, and I think it’s simply, it’s like if I didn’t take pictures of something, I didn’t really, I mean, there’s things on this list that don’t have anything to do with an event that I could have taken a picture at, but it was like going back through my photos. I was like, oh, yeah, we went to Mexico really earlier in the year it was so Jessie and I had to get some time away, just the two of us, which is something that we don’t get to do enough of. And we had a really good time with each other. And, and then of course I did, I did that particular thing of having that portrait made, which was just a goofy moment. It was her idea to you know, give me this ridiculous suit. And then it takes me we created this moment that became this fun thing that we could talk about. But that decision kind of, it created, it memorialized a trip that otherwise might would have just been like a really good trip, like me going to Thailand. Well, but the thing that I’m trying to figure out is, and this is why my number one is my number one, right? Because it is the moment that I feel like was definitely worth a picture. But it was the moment in which I was most present and everything seemed, like, there was like a moment of realization like, we talked about this a lot. We had a whole chapter in our book, “Book of Mythicality” about stopping and celebrating which, I’m really bad about doing because I am always moving on to the next thing. And so, More of a go and accomplish. Very rarely am I like, regardless of how well something is going or how awesome it is, very rarely am I like present in that moment. And this is common with most people, it’s very difficult to be present. But that’s why I put my number one as my number one because it was this confluence of this is an incredible moment. It’s meaningful, but you’re fully experiencing it, But what– Almost being overwhelmed by it. Whereas a lot of these things, like that trip with Jessie, when I think about it, the only thing that really connects with me is the fact that I took that picture. You know, what I’m saying like? I’m not, yeah, we had, we had good times and good conversation and stuff. But it’s like, seems very vague, and I don’t remember like Yeah. Being as present. And like being like, this is so cool. Like, we’re at this awesome resort in Mexico and the weather’s perfect, and like we’re together and like, let’s take a mental picture of where we’re at. So, for me more than anything, I’m actually looking through this list and thinking about how I want to approach 2020. Yeah, bit of a, a bit of a frustration. To be more present. Yeah, yeah. I mean, I’d forgotten that Christy and I also went down to Cabo for like, a long weekend. I was like, and I was like, you know, we should we should do that again. That was like, right before Valentine’s Day, right before. We flew home, and then, I turned around like the next day, and we flew to London to do, to go to VidCon London. And then we were in VidCon, London for Valentine’s Day. So I remember we were we were not with our wives, and I was, we were bummed about that. Ah, yeah. But yeah, I had, without looking at the picture, I’d kind of forgotten that, I’d taken a little Mexico getaway myself and it was very special. It didn’t make my list. It didn’t make your list? Didn’t make my list. Wow. So tough list to make. What number am I at? I’m at number– We should be doing eight. I’m at number eight, and I wanna save it, until after the break, because, we gotta do some promotions. And this is an interesting one that I gotta unpack. Okay, so Link will be back with number eight. But first, we’d like to let you know that, you can’t pick up the shirt Link has on the outside. But you can pick the shirt Link has on the inside, And it’s what’s on the inside that matters. Right, mythical.com, place for all your mythical needs, including cool, creative, iterations, on that concept of mythicality that we have tried to market like crazy. In forms of T shirts, bracelets, hats, we have sweat pants. We have sweat pants. That’s an understatement, ’cause we’ve got all types of sweat pants. Yeah. You can, and you can match the sweat shirt and wear it. You can wear a full uniform. And you can look good, you can look good. A mythical uniform. We don’t have any Rhett Link cangols. We need Rhett Link cangols. I don’t know if that’s in right now. Mythical.com, rep you boys. Do what you gotta do, and include us in it, on your body! All right, so now it’s time to get into my number eight. Now, last year we both turned 40 am I right? No. I turned– I’m 42. 42, I’m 41. Yeah, I turned 41 this year. You turned 42 Last year I turned 40, yes. And that was a big one for me. But not for you because you already 41. I figured it out. But this year I turned 41 you turned 42. Oh no, don’t tell me you turning 40 made your 2018 list? You made your 2018 list, not your 2019 list. Yeah, yeah, I did. Yeah, but it’s 2019. My birthday this year did not make my list. Yeah, I don’t even remember what I did for my birthday. Well, don’t say that because my number eight is your birthday! Freakin, but seriously, look, my number eight, Rhett’s birthday. Oh, oh, I was, oh yeah. No, don’t, don’t you– Yeah, the day. Yeah, man. I was talking about the night, the party. When we watched horror movies. You forgot the part that was meaningful enough to me, to be my number eight, and apparently isn’t on your list, but okay, whatever. I don’t think about myself like that. Okay. I’m very selfless. Remember at the beginning, when you felt like you were wronging somebody about forgetting something? Well, that’s somebody is me. It happened, already. At number eight. I knew I’d get you with this one. I’m just giving you a hard time. But yeah, my number eight is on, is your birthday. Because that day we, we had the day to just hang out, the two of us, and it was just, we were like, we’re gonna, we’re gonna go get some lunch, we’re gonna go see a movie and then that evening, more of your friends, and my friends, are gonna come over and we’re gonna watch another scary movie, you can have your Scary Movie Night. But the fact that we made plans for your birthday for the whole day turned out to be a kick ass special day. Right. That was, you had your first bite of a McRib. Well, we went and we… You know, okay, let’s think about the McRib thing. So you wanted to get a McRib. It’s your birthday, I’m like, yeah, let’s go get a McRib. And we’re on the way to the McRib. And we’re like, turning it into an Instagram story. Mm-hmm. And it was one of those, it was one of those times where it was like, I felt like we were having so much fun that we just decided, hey, we’re having so much fun let’s share it on an Instagram story. As opposed to, you know, it’s my birthday, we should really make an Instagram story. I felt like it was, it very much was that vibe. And it was just a lot of fun. You believed your own hype. That’s good. That’s good. Yeah, so we, you know, I didn’t like the McRib, but there was, it was fun to not like the McRib, on your birthday. Right. And then to, and then watch the movie, but, and I, you know, I think you’ll agree, even though I’m not gonna go into details, but I think it that, that day of us hanging out was the spark for ideas that we had later, that then will lead to things that, I think it, it planted a seed that will lead to things that we’re gonna be doing. Yeah, without a doubt. And I think that for you know, we get so busy being professional friends, and I think it was, honestly, it was a year ago when we had a conversation that was like, you know, we work so hard. It’s, are we really preserving time to just cultivate our friendship, you know? Mm-hmm. That was almost a year ago now when we were having these private discussions, right? Right. Or I can think of one specific discussion that we had. And then, I think that your birthday, many months later, 11 almost 12 months later after that conversation, for me was a great fulfillment of that conversation we had that’s like, “Hey, our friendship is important.” And it’s not something that can just be second to what, we just can’t ride on the coattails of whatever we’re creating is going to buoy our friendship absolutely. Right. Everything we do create does, I mean, it does contribute in a huge way to like, the vibrance of our friendship, but it can’t be, that can’t be the only source of it, you know? Well, and I think what we, I think, maybe, this isn’t, this isn’t necessarily in contrast to what you’re saying, but also realizing that, there is, and I’m trying to do this in a way that doesn’t spoil what we’re, what I know you’re thinking about. Yeah. But there is a way for our friendship and our professional friendship to inform one another more directly. Meaning that, sure, we can do something stupid together that is primarily designed to do, to be an internet video, and we’re gonna have a good time. But that’s just us deciding to do something that we think will get views, whereas there is, there’s a way to be like, actually, the starting point is our friendship. And then finding the content in the friendship versus finding the friendship in the content. I think what you’re saying is that it’s not easy to find the friendship in the content, because it kind of starting in a place where this is work, and of course, we’re going to do it together and we’re going to have a good time. I actually, it’s not– But if you start with a friendship, and we’ll talk a lot about this at the top of the year in our first podcast. Yes, I think we can leave it at that. But I just want to memorialize as my number eight, that it was just and I think we, we were kind of realizing it that day, you know, that you were like, we should do this more often. You know, it’s like, yeah! It was, it was it was a pivotal. It was a pivotal day in our friendship. Yeah. And it was my number eight. Didn’t make my list. Now, I regret that it didn’t. Okay. So you can put it at a half. And you know– I’ll add it later. The commemorative version of this okay? Sure, add it right now, where would you add it? Maybe, maybe, maybe one and a half? Maybe. Oh, all the way at the top? No, I mean, no eight, can make it eight. Well you already have an eight. Seven and a half. Okay, seven and a half. . Okay, so higher than mine, that’s what I thought. But I will miss you to my seven. Another trip that I took, but this has a little bit of a different way into this one, so, I talked a lot about this, told a funny story about my Colorado ski trip. Was it funny? With the family, The thing in your boot. Where I left that dumb ass, ski goggles, snow thing, Squeegee. Squeegee in my boot all day and thought my foot was dying. I had a great time with my kids. Jessie of course didn’t really ski so, it was me and the boys having a good time for the entire week. And that was great that family time. But you know the thing that I actually look back on that and realize that there was a breakthrough. There’s two things on my list that represent breakthroughs for me. Oh, some kind of number seven breakthrough? And the thing that happened on that Colorado trip. So you know, I’ve struggled with back issues that have at times been debilitating. And, what, and of course, I have like my stretching routine and stuff that I’ve done basically every morning for a coupla years now. And basically, I am completely reliant on doing this routine. But there’s an aspect, there’s a part of the routine, that I used to only do on the weekends, right, because it’s time consuming. I had this lacrosse ball. Oh gosh, this is where it gets weird. How big is it? And erm, It’s the size of a lacrosse ball. Slightly smaller than a baseball I would say, it’s like a rubber ball. And my physical therapist kind of showed me how you can– Put it up your… No. You can roll on it and roll it your muscles out, in the same way that you would with like a foam roller but it’s more of a trigger point sort of pinpoint thing, and I kind of roll it all the way up my back, all the way on each side, in between my shoulder blades and. So I’ve had lower back problems and that’s been my most debilitating thing, but I also have middle back, mid-back problems, and I have upper back problems, right? Okay. All along my spine which I probably have degenerative disc disease. I’ve got these issues, and they, and when I have committed to doing something that’s very like trying, physically, like skiing for six days in a row, I always know that like it’s pretty, it’s not unlikely. That I could get hurt, Touch and go. And then this whole trip’s ruined. So every single morning in Colorado I got up and I did my routine but I added the like the trigger point thing, and I like was super precise in everything that I did, and took a lot of time, and took about 20, 25 minutes to do this routine every single morning and I had an incredible time and my back never hurt once. And then when I got back home, I was like, Gotta keep doing it? I gotta keep doing this. Oh yeah? Every day since that trip, You’ve been dong the ball. Every one of them, I’ve done the full routine, The McLaughlin method? And it has transformed my life. You hit a new lev, I didn’t know this, you hit a new level? I work out a few times a week, probably about five times a week now. But I was working out two, three times a week at that point, and a lot of times I would have to call my trainer. I wake up I’d be like, I can’t do it, can’t go in, is, will be unwise to lift weights today. Because my back would be screwed up. And sometimes it would take a week or two to recover. And it was just really difficult to get into a rhythm. Ever since that ski trip when I’m paying this close attention to my back, I’ve been able to go in for both of my workouts that are scheduled with my trainer, and then an additional three, sometimes four days, going in and I’ve kind of gotten addicted to like, staying active. The ball, oh. Who knows what’ll happen, right? It is touch and go. But like, I’m, I’m doing the squats, man. I’m doing deadlift. I’m like doing like legit things to strengthen every muscle in my body without this fear that would be associated with all this stuff back when basically the last 15, 20 years of my life. You wanna do a Spartan Race? I, you know what, when you were doing the Spartan Race almost a year ago, I was like, I started thinking I’d like to do that, but, I don’t know if I could take it. But I kind of feel like I could take it now. I kind of feel like I’m in a place where I could physically take it. So I’m open to it. Hmm, okay, I just meant that metaphorically. I mean that, I’d race against you. Well I was hoping to find, oh, I was hoping to find like another training partner ’cause it’s like too much overlap would not be healthy for us. I wanna do it with Blondina. Blondine? Oh, bless. Blondine’s with me, man. Okay. Blondine’s with me. Good for you and your balls. Yeah, right. I do have, I have actually there’s, I’ve got balls everywhere. I’ve got a ball in my backpack. I got a ball on my bedside table. I got a ball in my suitcase. I’ve got balls everywhere. Who shows you? Who showed you the ball technique? It was Yvonne, man. Yvonne?. My physical therapist who was very instrumental in all this. Huh, shout out to Yvonne. Yeah, shout out to her. You should write her a note. I thought about it. Thought about just mailing her a ball with no note. You could write on the ball. Yeah. You could, you could mail a ball, you really can. You could mail a a ball? Yeah, just put a stamp on it. You can mail a lacrosse ball, just write on the ball. I think. Okay, I’ll take it under advisement. My number seven is, okay, I pulled a little chicanery here. My number seven has two parts. Because I, this was for this was a Lando moment, and then my Lincoln moment was floating around and it was like it fell off my list, and I’m like, Whoa. I can’t have my Lando moment ’cause I got another Lily moment coming later, so I’m like, shoot, I gotta, so I gotta a Link– Don’t tell him this. Yeah, I won’t, I won’t. Don’t tell him he fell off the list. Hhe didn’t fall off the list because they’re both at number seven. My number seven a, is this was the year that Lincoln and I started mountain biking together. Like I gave him my mountain bike and I bought a new mountain bike. ‘Cause I’m not gonna buy him a new mountain bike, Right, right I can do that. When I already, you know, I can just give him mine and get a new one. I needed one that was a little bigger anyway. Because you’ve grown. That’s been a special thing. Over the, this has been the year of us taking some mountain biking journeys together. And that’s been very special. And then seven b, is this is also the year of me and Lando having special bedtime moment. Like– Might wanna clarify that. I tuck Lando in the bed every night, and then like, I’ll tuck him into the, under the sheets, and like pull the covers up to his chin, and then like, I gotten this habit of then like, I would then plop down and lay down on the bed beside him on top of the covers and just like talk to him for a few minutes. I don’t know if I shared this on Ear Biscuits, but I’ll just talk to him. And I would just get a kick out of hearing from him. I remember, I think I did share on Ear Biscuits where it was like, after the episode of GMM where Shepherd kicked me in the balls, and then we had the whole conversation about like, that lead to am I acting on the show? Or am I really being sincere? Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. That that was one example of many of the conversations we’ve had. That still should have made the list. When I’m just tucking him in, it’s just it could be five minutes, it could be 15 minutes of us, just having a conversation, sometimes whatever he wants to talk about. But the thing that really got me was, I started to notice when it got close to bedtime, he would be like, he kind of tapped me on the on the elbow and he’d like, give me a look and nod his head. Like, it’s time for me to go to bed. So I can hang out just with dad. And I realized for him how special it was. ‘Cause for me, I thought it was special. But as a parent, you’re looking for those moments of acknowledgement that what you feel like is special, they also feel like it’s special. And it’s really rare, because kids just go through life not knowing what’s special. Then they remember it’s special when they get older. Yeah. So for him to start to treasure that and to value that and wanna go to bed a little bit earlier so we have that time to talk was just, this is the year that that happened. And you know, with every day kids change and they’re, at a certain point he’s gonna boot me out and say, “Dad, you don’t have to tuck me in at all. “What are you doing?” Maybe? I don’t know. But at some point you should probably voluntarily. Yeah. Excise yourself. Like when he’s 18. When he’s married. Yeah, right. And he’s settled down in a home of his own. When he’s an adult. But this is the year of that and so for both those things, that’s, that’s easily my number seven. Well, I gave each one of my kids their own line. I didn’t combine my kids into one. I didn’t want to do that to ’em. But I, and I also put them higher on my list. So, Some of my kids come back. I’ll get to that in a second. But for now, this is more about me. Number six, is, as I’ve shared extensively, and in an entire podcast, clarity and therapy, I think my number one last year may have been therapy. I can’t remember. I, therapy was really high on my list last year because that was the year that I started or I just started at the end of 2017. I’m in much more of a rhythm with my therapy, but also it’s kind of like, the only thing I feel like I’ve really done is I’ve just sort of peeled back layers, and seeing everything that I need to deal with. I don’t know how much progress I’ve made with anything, but, I’ve just become aware of the progress that needs to take place. Mm-hmm. But the clarity, the clarity that led to me making the decision to turn into a homeless/Jesus person, in terms of my hairstyle, that I explained in that episode, that happened this year, so recognizing that I’m always in my head, that I’m always intellectualizing things and not stopping to feel things, that became kind of crystallized this year. I’m still in the very early baby steps of actually making progress about it. But I think that I kind of, there wasn’t like this one moment, but there was just sort of this general realization this year of like I kinda understand what I’m trying to accomplish. I’m beginning to understand what is the work that I’m trying to do in therapy? ‘Cause it takes a really long time to get to that point when– Can you articulate that, or is that just for you? Well, no, I mean, no, I think it’s just what I talked about on the podcast, it’s about, Okay. I mean, the oversimplification of it is understand, is basically feeling. It’s not that I don’t feel, it’s that as soon as I begin to feel I intellectualize and I deflect those feelings into rational thought, as opposed to being like, “No, no, I’m going to actually feel this. “I’m gonna feel where it is. “I’m going to experience this. “I’m going to learn to communicate this. “I’m gonna be able to communicate this in my relationships,” and beginning to understand what that might look like. But there’s a lot of unwinding and sort of deprogramming that is required. So, you know, one of the things that I noticed from all the touring we did this year with the meet and greets, is that once, once the momentum of you mentioning therapy on the podcast started to accumulate, I noticed that people would say to you, in the meet and greet line, they want, they thank you for being open about therapy and many people were saying that they started going to therapy for the first time and you had a big role in that, you know. That was really encouraging to me, so, I guess to put the, to pound the pavement a little bit, what’s the, how’d it, how did you, how did you feel about that? Um, you know, actually– I don’t know if pound the pavement’s the right thing. I don’t think it is, but, I told I told my therapist about… I think I can’t remember when it was, but it was, it maybe in, been that summer tour, I was like, I wanna let you know that I had more than a few people come up and say that, you know, they were, they were happy that I had been so open about therapy and kinda remove the stigma a little bit for them, and now they were going to therapy and it was helpful or whatever. And my therapist started crying. And then again, after we get back, we got back from this most recent tour, I was like, “Man, I just wanna let you know. “people keep saying it.” Like I, I’d say in a meet and greet line of 100 people or whatever, there’s three or four people who will who will mention this and, started crying again. And he’s like, “That means so much. “It means so much.” Yeah, so I mean, yeah, that was, it was very special because I think that I definitely thought that therapy was for people who had some diagnosable mental condition. Okay, yeah. And I, the way that I have, I’ve really, well, in one sense, I think we we all have some, something diagnosable, but I think it’s– Well, I didn’t want to say that ’cause it was gonna seem like I was cutting on you, but I think you definitely do. But I think that yeah, it’s just the way that I see it. And now understanding that there’s so many people, basically, I know everybody’s not in position to have, to afford it, or have the time for it or whatever. But, it’s just this like, it’s as essential as going to the doctor for a physical and, Which would you give up first, the lacrosse ball or therapy? I thankfully don’t have to make that choice. You can combine the two save a little time. I think if I didn’t have the lacrosse ball, then maybe the problems would become insurmountable. And therapy would, it’s just more important than, erm, Like, you’re talking like Pavlov’s hierarchy of needs? Yeah, I just would be miserable. Yeah, but so I, I’ve got some clarity. And, you know, who knows what’s going to happen in 2020? I mean, I will say my hair and my beard will continue to be longer and– Don’t make any commitments. It’s already– ‘Cause you don’t have to. It’s really just, Take it day to day. I am already a little bit tired, tired of it. You don’t wanna be making any long term commitments. But you know, Okay, But I’m not gonna, I’m not stopping anytime soon. Hey, listen, it’s not admitting defeat to get a haircut or a beard trim. I’m not gonna do it. There’s no judgment from me. I’m not gonna say anything. I’m not gonna say, ha! I have not reached my final form yet. You know, what, do whatever you wanna do. And I also have not experienced what I think are, I have not actualized. You’re not ugly enough. Okay? You gotta get uglier. Well, that’s gonna happen. Is that what you sayin’? No, I’m just saying that I’m not gonna cut it anytime soon. Hey, hey, hey. It hasn’t accomplished it’s purpose yet. And I have nothing to say about it. Okay, what’s your number whatever? I, you know what I will say though, I do have some to say about it. I, I don’t have a therapist. 2019, That’s what 2020 is about! 2019 is, has been the year for me to continually say that I’m going to find a therapist. Right. And it hasn’t happened. So, but I’m, I’m very much in favor of it. So I’m, I’ve got a coupla names. And I’m, yeah, Oh, really? So I’m trying to find, yeah, I’m trying to find somebody. And not your guy. ‘Cause I just don’t think that’s, we need some That would be not be a good idea. Separation, right? Right? But I will take a recommendation, so you should ask. I have asked. Did you tell me? He, he, He doesn’t have a recommendation? He got this look, and he was like, “Man, okay. “I really feel like, I gotta get somebody really good.” Oh, yeah, get him. Don’t let him– And that was the that was where we left it. Ask him again. Okay, he didn’t wanna, he didn’t wanna give you somebody that wasn’t good. I kinda want someone who’s not good, though. Who wants someone who? I want, you know what I want. I’m looking for a therapist who’s not really good. No, I’m not. All right, tell him to give me a good one. All right, I did. What number, what number am I on? I’m on number six. Number six for me is the London trip that Christy and I took with Lily for her 16th birthday to the land of Harry Potter. That really is what it seemed like. We did so much Harry Potter stuff. And again, I talked about it in a whole episode. But it’s one of those things that I think… Again, it was a great trip. But it was special because it was, it was just the three of us, you know, and we may never go on a trip just the three of us again. So I will, I’ll always remember that. Like, I can remember a lot of the specifics, which I’ve already talked about, but, so I won’t go into it. But I’m so grateful that, that we did that. With all of these things. We talk about these trips and all this stuff. I’m so grateful that we have the means to go on so many freakin’ trips and do so many things. It’s like, I almost feel guilty, you know? The way it’s like, “Well, you know, when I went to Thailand, “that only made it to number nine,” you know. It’s like we’re, we’re so, hashtag, blessed. But, you know, I’ll just leave it at that. I’m not gonna, I’m not gonna apologize, I’m gonna be grateful. And I’m very grateful for that for that London trip. That’s my number six. My number five is also related to my eldest child. So Locke and I have a thing we like to do together. We like to watch horror movies. And this year… You know, I, the past couple of years, I’ve felt a little bit guilty about watching horror movies with him ’cause he was like 13, 14. But now he’s 15 he’s a man, you know? This point, you can’t really screw ’em up. And so we watched “Hereditary” together, which I’m not gonna see that. For the final like 45 minutes of that movie, we were just curled up on a couch like, holding one another. And we’ve watched many horror movies together and we’ve kind of like found our thing. We’re like very, we’re very similar, and sometimes our similarities can create some tension. But we’ve kind of found that like, this is something that we both like to do and it is exclusive to us because Jessie’s not into it, and Shepherd like, has to be in his bedroom with the door on and music, door closed and music on, in order to be able to, like he’s not interested in any of this stuff. Mm-hmm. Even though he’s got a dark sense of humor he does not want to experience anything directly dark in a movie. So, it’s kind of our thing, ’cause I don’t really have any, but I don’t, you know, other than my friends that I coerce into watching horror movies with me. Yeah, On my birthday. I don’t have people who want to watch horror movies with me. So that’s been a special point of connection for us that I’m like, ” Okay, we got a lot of horror movies “to watch in the next two and a half years “while he’s still here.” It’s nice to have things that you both enjoy, you know? And especially if they initiate, like Lincoln talks to me about, like, the latest hip hop release, ’cause he’s into that. Lily, the other night, I was talking, I was talking last week about waiting up for Lily for to get home. And when she got home, we spent like 45 minutes going through the memes that she had pinned on her Pinterest account ’cause I was just like, “You have to explain this to me.” Like, just the cut, we’re both into the same comedy. But that’s not my number five. My number five. This, this is a tough one. This was again, I devoted an entire episode I believe, to talking about this, so I don’t have to rehash all the details. But, when mom and my not step-dad, or father-in-law, Lewis, showed up, and then he was immediately transported the hospital where almost died, Mm-hmm. Was, I mean, that’s something that I will never forget, for all the reasons that I articulated. And then last week, I filled you in on how Lewis went back home and for the rest of the year, he continued to struggle to, to regain his footing, literally, as well as figuratively. So it was like, that, I mean, that was a big moment. I feel like, I felt like I changed as a person, you know? I felt like there was a lot that I took away in terms of empathy and care. I was, a large part of my relationship with my mom was defined by her having to care for Lewis, for the rest of the year. We would talk multiple times a week just to get an update. And I would help her think through. You know, you get kind of in this fog when you’re caring for somebody you haven’t yet, they haven’t been at home for like, months and months, and having, they’re, they’re on the verge of death and you’re trying to figure out how to interact with the doctors and how to be proactive and to be their main advocate. So that I, she’s bouncing a lot of this off of me. And it, so it really defined our relationship. We never talked that much on the phone since I, since I moved out. And it was very difficult, but it was also very meaningful. And I don’t think if we hadn’t have gone through together in person, what happened with Lewis here, I don’t know that I would have been able to have the level of empathy to connect with her over the phone to, I would have, I think I would have been at a total loss, if I just heard, mom calls me up and says, you know, Lewis had a stroke, he’s he’s not doing well at all, and then she’s giving me updates. You know what I’m saying? Yeah. The fact that I, I went through that, Christy and I went through that with her, really changed and expanded my ability to be there as much as I could. It was still very frustrating because it was just over the phone until I saw them in July for that week we were in Buies Creek and then over Thanksgiving break, but, so that, that’s my number five, that was something I will never forget. And I’m so grateful that he’s, he’s on the road to recovery. And he is back at home now, getting all types of therapy at home to get back on his feet. You’re at number four. My number four is my other child. It was, you know, I didn’t wanna put one in front of the other, But you did. I put two of mine on the same one. I didn’t wanna violate the rules of our little Yeah. Arrangement here and put both of them on the same line. But also, I put up my experience with Shep, my experience with Shep higher, because I think that my relationship with Shepherd actually had the most significant change this year. Shep and I, I think we realized some things about each other this year. We spent a lot of time together for a number of, you know, logistical reasons like, you know, needing to take him to school, or like Jessie’s like, I gotta go do this thing. And, you know, there was a, he ended up transferring out of the school that he was in. And then Jessie actually homeschooled him for a couple of months at the end of last year before he got into this new school. And that was not an easy decision. No, That was a big decision. And so, and he’s like, great right now. I mean, he’s doing better than he’s ever done. But there was, when he was being homeschooled, of course, there was some days was like, “You gotta take Shep to school, to work with you,” because Jessie had to go do something, or. And, so we ended up spending a lot of time together. And we did that thing I talked about, you know, we went to the, we would go to like parks together and we like went around trying to find that Fibonacci spiral and, Yeah. And then, I think a lot of that kind of culminated in this, the trip that we took to Joshua Tree that I talked about. I talked about taking the trip, that I was gonna take the trip, but then I didn’t tell you about the trip. I think I just put all the pictures from the trip on my Instagram and said that I would. But we had an incredible time when we went to Joshua Tree. Went to Joshua Tree Camp to the same spot where I had camped a coupla years before and took the same selfie, went to Salvation Mountain, went to Slab City, went to the Salton Sea together. And Shep and I have, like we are on the exact same wavelength when it comes to the way we experience music, as an example. Mm-hmm. Like, you know, I’ve gotten this, I’ve got this insight now until like, okay, I know that Shep was gonna like this and like, so I’d be like, “Hey, Shep, I gotta, I got a new artist “I want you to check out.” And it’ll be like Roy Orbison. Not exactly a new artist. And he loves it? Shepherd will be in his room going to bed singing Roy Orbison, like he’s playing, he’s playing “Pretty Woman” Ha! And “Dreams” and he and he like, and I can see, I know when he’s gonna like something. Mm-hmm. So I start playing Roy Orbison and he gets this look on his face like, what is this? Hmm. And he just loves it. And so, and then we kind of experienced movies in the same way, like, I’m a crier at movies. Shep is the same way and I kinda know the moments that he’s going to be crying because it’s the moment that I’m gonna be crying. But we, while we’re going down the road, going to, a lot of traveling involved in this trip to Joshua Tree, we started listening to the podcast, that was my rec last week, “Dolly Parton’s America.” and I was kind of like, ” Okay, he’s 11, is he?” He was enthralled. Really? He, and so, we have sort of, like, like I said, it’s not that like, Locke wouldn’t be into those things in the same way. But especially Shepherd at such a young age, like finding that, like, we connect with the same stories and music in that way. We’ve, you know, we’re, if you find those things that you can kinda, you can kinda bond over. Hmm. And especially with And also– The music that like my parents kind of introduced to me that kind of like formed the way that I see the world in a lot of ways, you know? But it’s, it’s kind of like what I was saying. It’s cool to like the same things. But I also think you’re describing something even deeper and that’s really understanding who our kids are as people. You know, I think it would always feel a little foreign to me, I don’t know if you felt this way? Like, I always felt like Christy really understood the kids. I mean, from a young age, she, I always felt like she totally understood who they were as people. It was like she could see the future and see who they were gonna become. And I mean, she was so, she was so involved in so many, if not all aspects of their lives, because, you know, they did homeschooling. Didn’t you get that sense from Jessie too that, like, in a way that I just didn’t unders? I just don’t, I didn’t have that deep knowledge of my kids in the way that Christy did at a younger age. And I feel like what we’re both describing is something that on our list this year is being able to really understand them as, as people as fellow humans, not just as as kids, but, you know, understanding what makes them tick and like how they’re, what resonates with their hearts kind of thing? Well, and I think a big part of it is, we, you know, we talked, I can’t remember exactly how we worded this, but we talked about it in the “Book of Mythicality,” about you finding something that you both like in the way that that engenders this connection? Yeah. ‘Cause it’s just like, “I get this, and if you get this “in the same way that I get it,” and you’re, it’s like, “If you’re seeing the color green, “the same way that I’m seeing the color green,” which, by the way, is everyone. That’s how eyes work, but it’s like, you get it and I get it, we get each other. And it’s sort of that triangle that forms between a common interest in two people. And I think that our kids are just getting to an age where that’s… Maybe more– Maybe more likely to happen. And I don’t know, you know, if our, the way that our wives have connected with the kids is just, there’s like a, it’s from a different angle. That would allow them to connect in an earlier point, or something. Rather than something is a choice it’s… A maternal? Well, I think it might be maternal, but it’s also just a function of how much time that they have spent with them. Yeah. And they’ve, they’ve just literally schooled them you know? Right. So it might be like that we’re just, we’re only willing to do things we really like to do. So when they can finally do stuff like mountain bike with us, then they can come along, and we can have that sense of connection. Maybe there’s a little bit of that, but I don’t Well, I mean, I don’t want to overanalyze it, but I do, I do think that I do think it’s important to find those things that you can you can do together and appreciate together. I mean, that’s the way to, it’s what friendships are made of. My number, let’s see, my number three will bring us back to that. But my number four moment is our first “Bleak Creek” conversation show in October. We were in Boston this was when our– This is my number two, but, Oh, really? But it’s– It’s your number two? Well, I put “Bleak Creek,” all things “Bleak Creek.” and I have like three pieces of that. Yeah, there’s three pieces. There’s the Bleaker Conversations tour. There’s the novel itself coming out. And then there’s the fact that we went to Buies Creek. The Buies Creek trip. We didn’t like the docu-follow series where we went back to our, to Buies Creek. Yeah, put down at number two. So the moment that sticks out to me is when we were, we were on stage, and this was the first time in Boston that we did this. And we projected the, our trip to Buies Creek behind us. So we had the privilege of the vantage point of being on stage and watching and hearing everyone’s response to our trip back to Buies Creek. And it was that you know, the novel we worked so hard on, we were so excited it. It about it was coming out. The next day, they already had a copy right there in their seats. They’re reacting to us going back to Buies Creek. And the reaction was so thrilling to me. It was unlike, I mean, we’ve had a lot of really special experiences on tour on stage, especially over this year. I feel like we’ve grown so much as performers in a way that we never could if we hadn’t toured so much, and done the three different shows that we did. Mm-hmm. But there’s, that moment stands out, because we were just there as spectators and they were reacting and then what, you know, when it gets to the final one, and we’re like talking about renewing our blood oath, and then the lights come up and we shake hands on stage and we say, “You know what? “This right now, this book and what we’re doing, “the oath is fulfilled,” you know? It’s a tangible fulfillment of the oath, and everybody just started cheering. You remember that moment? Yeah. So that’s the moment for me that’s the culmination of the work of the novel, us going to Buies Creek and how special that was, maybe deserving its own, I don’t know. I could have emphasized that more on my list, but it’s all in there. Yeah, and that first show, you know, it’s interesting because I feel like the process of writing the novel, there was never a real moment just because of the way a novel comes together. And then there’s the iterative process of editing and all the steps that lead up to the book coming out. There’s no point that you can, there’s nothing you can point to that really is the definitive moment in which you’re like, we wrote a book. Right, right. And then there was the trip to Buies Creek which was really awesome in and of itself. Especially like the swimming in the river. You know, I kind of, I remember I kind of being somewhat present for that. But it was really the whole package of that coming together that night, and seeing it in the context of the community of mythical beasts. To me that was the definitive moment as well, was that show was like seeing them respond to it, and I was kind of for the first time watching it. We had watched all the pieces of it but like, seeing it together in context, where we’re talking about the book and which bright lined up with the day that the book, the next day, the book is coming out. Yeah, it just felt like this is a, this is the way to do it, you know? We even said that when we were touring, it was like, if, you know, there’s many reasons that we did, we did the tour. Obviously, one of them is, well, we want, we’re trying to sell more books. I mean, you know, Yeah. But I think that, that being the initial reason, and be like, okay, this is a great way to sell more books, it became way bigger than that. Oh, yeah. And in that, it was like, the connection with who we are, and like this book being this perfect expression of who we are personally, but what we’re trying to accomplish professionally, and then being able to do that in the context, of community in this package of this film. Yeah, that was a special moment. That’s why it was number two for me. So in, and what do you, are you singling out a part of it, making it your number two? Uh, you know, I mean, I said going to the river during the trip was very special, but no, it’s really, I think that Boston show that first show was because, you know, and quite honestly, even though they were all very special shows, by the time even the second show, even the New York show that– We weren’t very surprised by any reactions because we, you know, you know, the points when people There’s nothing like that first time that you, are gonna allow to your– especially when you’re Yeah. Showing a film, basically right? Right, right. It’s different than a concert. But being, I mean, the actual been in buoys Creek part of it,I’m glad that you put it at number two, and I’m glad that you couched it that way because and I kinda wish I did, because it was very, it was very special being there, like literally being in the river, like that moment. I think ’cause we had crossed, we had searched for the tree, and then when we’re coming back the girls were like, “Do we have time to just swim for a minute?” Hmm. And like, and they were like, “Well, we gotta keep moving. “You know, we gotta, we’re gonna go, we got a lot of other stuff we need to film”. We’re like, “We got a couple of minutes, you know?” and they still filmed it which is part of the thing, but, that was more of like, this is us just doing what we did, just because we wanna do it. We’ve come this far to come back, Right. That is a big moment, when we jumped in the water hole. So is it, it should be your go. So number three. It’s my number three. Okay. So my number three is my Scotland trip. You know I did the week in Scotland with my, with all the McLaughlin’s that kind of culminated in my mom breaking our ankle at the Laughlin Castle and then later realizing that I’m Irish. That’s it, I mean, that has got to go down. I mean, I said it then I’ll say it again now, it’s like the, I mean, that’s a big I think that’s the biggest moment on Ear Biscuits that moment where you said that. Turns out we’re Irish. That was ridiculous. Um, but yeah, you know, the reason this one is very high on the list is probably obvious in that it was, you know, this was something that, and I thought about a lot and I was like, “One day, I’m gonna take you know, “I’m gonna take my family to their ancestral land,” which really isn’t their ancestral land. To, what, let me clarify. We are gonna do, we are gonna do a follow up. I don’t know if it’s going to be a full podcast. We have gotten more information about this. Even you’ve got information as well, but you haven’t analyzed any of your information. Right. It isn’t that I’m not Scottish, okay? It’s kind of difficult to differentiate between Scottish and Irish. But you, I kinda want it to be that you’re not Scottish, because now, But I’m definitely more Irish than Scottish. You can get, Yeah, you can, now you need to do it all again. I can do the same thing in Ireland, yeah. So you’re freakin, you’re freakin’ number two on your list, you have a baked in other number. Number three. Okay, number three. You got a baked in number three, years from now? Just do it again– I don’t know if my mom will travel with me any more. ‘Cause you broke her ankle. Yeah. But you know, it’s interesting because, Remember that? When my mom did the lie detector thing with your mom over a year ago, Yeah. And in that video, she basically said, “I wish you would call me more.” And then I started calling her more. I don’t know if I call, I haven’t kept up with every two weeks, like she asked me to. But it was, it’s more than, it’s significantly more than it was before that. And you know, we continue to talk quite a bit leading up to that trip. And then of course, when she broke her ankle, we were in even more regular contact. And she’s, she’s actually had a coupla other medical issues this year. Nothing like super serious, but stuff that’s kind of trying and annoying. But her ankle is basically better. That’s great. But so, and from her perspective, you know, she sees it as a blessing that it happened. And the way her kind of her community came around her and it actually led to her discovering some other things that she needed to take care of, that she’s dealing with. But, yeah, you know, we just, that that group, the all the McLaughlin’s have never really, we definitely never traveled together, but haven’t spent a lot of time together. So there was, you know, my brother, and my dad and I being able to play golf at St. Andrews. That was like a really special day. That may be like, one of the coolest parts of that whole trip. But there’s a lot of those like moments of must been like, doing falconry together, and then going to the castle, right up into the moment when my mom broke her ankle, it was beautiful, it was perfect. But then after she did break her ankle, like us kind of coming together, and having to figure out well what are we gonna do now? How are we gonna handle this problem? So it was it was definitely one of the most memorable trips of my life, and probably the last time that that group I mean, you know, now we’ve got my oldest nephew is gonna, he’s gonna be in college next year. So it’s probably the last time that we’ll just that group will be together for that period of time doing something like that. Yeah, so I think it, I do think that it, you know, it was one of the reasons that kind of the communication and just the nature of my relationship with my family, it continues to evolve. Like you kind of hinted at earlier, you’re on the Thanksgiving podcast, on the last podcast, just the nature of like, it was different. Now that we’re out here and this the level of involvement, like you’ve been able to be with with your mom and Lewis when that happened, and it kind of changed the dynamic and the way that you talk to them. Yeah, I feel like being there, being together for that length of time, and then being there when mom encountered that problem it’s kind of changed the nature of our dialogue. Mm-hmm. You know? Yeah. In a way that I think wasn’t really the case like moving, once you’re, once you’re on the other side of the country, you know, you can just pick up the phone and talk at anytime ’cause you’re not in each other’s lives it does change the nature of your, Right. Of your relationship. And that’s your number three. That’s my number three. Oh, wow. ‘Cause my number two is what I already covered, which is my “Bleak Creek” stuff. Okay. Stuff. Okay, got it. And then my, so my number three is, the summer tour, where Lily and Lincoln were able to come along for the ride. Literally riding on the bus, sleeping there at night, you know, helping roll up posters. I think at least technically they helped out a little bit. But it was, when we toured after that, I remember being backstage and I would just miss them not being there, you know, and that’s why I would like get on video chat and talk to ’em, you know, when we were backstage. Because it was it was special to have ’em there. And for them to be invested in something that was that their dad was working on was really cool. And for them to think it was cool, enough. And you know, Lily talks a lot about how it’s like, you know, I really, I really loved going on tour, I miss that. And Gary was like, “You’ve got the the tour bug.” But they both, I like to think that it’s one of those things that would make their, you know, their top 10 List of the year, that they, and I could, you know, again, it’s meaningful when you can tell that it’s meaningful to them. So it was, it was a lot of fun to travel with them that way, and to treat them more as part of the crew than my kids. So I think it helped change the way that we interact and the way that they see me, and the things that they’ll choose to talk to me about and the way that they’ll talk to me. Mm-hmm. Like I remember the specific conversations that we would be having that then they would feel much more comfortable interjecting, and like the way that you and the kids would get into it with each other, something that was very special to me, because I could tell that they they kind of rose to the occasion of being treated more as as adults and part of the crew. So that was special. And that was my number three. Which brings you to your number one. So should I share my number, two? Sure. To save your number one? Yeah. Okay to even it out, I’ll give my number two which was performing at the Ryman in Nashville. Well, that was my number one. Oh, well that’s perfect. Okay, so I still haven’t my number one, but okay. Well, I’ll let you take the lead on it since it was your number one. We’ve talked about how meaningful it was being to go to the hallowed grounds of country music, place where Merle had performed, and then to perform the two Merle songs that we ended up covering and then putting on the record for the Mythical Society. That was just, it was a perfect show in a lot of ways, right? I mean, as, I mean, we’ve had really good crowds and all the crowds are really good, Mm-hmm. But sometimes you get a just a really special engaged crowd. I think they can, they could tell how special it was to us. And it was like, it was like they were sharing something that they knew was so meaningful to us. Yeah, and it’s just in you know, venues are different, and that place is, it’s special not just because of the history but literally the physicality of the Ryman, the acoustics, the fact that you can hear everything that everyone says and does and it just feels like you’re, all the every all the energy is focused right there into the middle. And I, the thing, the reason it was number one for me, is because when we were performing those Merle songs, and many times that night, I had this really overwhelming sense that I actually remember thinking like, “It doesn’t get any better than this.” Hmm, hmm. You know what I’m saying? Like, from a– While it’s happening you’re this. Yeah, yeah, yeah. From like a dream come true standpoint of performing, doing the thing that, doing the thing that we’re, you know, we do a performance, for us is it can be one of many different things, right? Yeah. We try. We do a lot of different things. But doing a concert, it’s like, okay, this is us at what, for lack of a better word, our professional peak right, doing what it is that we love to do with each other, for this audience that’s completely engaged in this place, and then it just hit me as like, “And you know what? “You’re really enjoying it right now, “like you’re really taking it in.” In a way that like, I just don’t do. I mean, a lot of these things on your list may be more ultimately meaningful or impactful ’cause they were, they’re to do with my kids or my wife, or, you know, my family back in North Carolina. But it was really difficult to narrow those down to one, one particular moment where it felt like everything just sort of came together in this weird, almost mystic cosmic moment. In that, I mean, we’ve had some great moments on stage, where it was like, Yeah. Okay, this ridiculous bit, becomes something that you could never have written, but it just happened, and now it’s a special moment in time just for those people who came to that show, and it’ll never happen like that again. Right. But that was the one that I felt like I was fully present for. Yeah, I remember looking at you, and then when we were when we were singing the Merle songs with Britton, like looking at Britton too, it’s just like having, especially when he had the guitar solo, ’cause it was like, I didn’t have to do anything. Yeah, I mean, you had to keep strumming along but like, he was, that was a, that was a very easy moment to like, “Okay, there’s no pressure of performance for me.” I’m like, “I can,” I was looking. I was looking at how much fun you were having. He was into it, it’s like that’s the moment where I was really savoring and taking it in. And we talked about it on stage and like, that, it became the, us experiencing it became the experience for the audience. So like they became a part of it and it was just a cycle of energy. Yeah, it’s it’s weird because it’s like, it’s the one moment I can point to on here, where I can actually remember what it felt like, Yeah. Whereas everything else, I can kind of remember what happened and how it makes me feel now. But I can almost like transport myself back to that moment, I was like, it registered. I was like, “Oh, this is, “this moment is hitting me right now.” Whereas typically, you’re doing something like camping with your kid or whatever. And you’re like, this whole thing is awesome. And I’m having a great time. Yeah And this a moment where we’re listening to this podcast, and I’m realizing that this is a good thing, we’re bonding, et cetera. But it really is the sort of taking it and distilling it later as a memory and that, but it was like, no, it was in the moment. Yeah. And it really only happened, the is the one I can point to. It’s the one time I can I can point to that being the case. Well, and I mean, when you talk about the ther, you know, when you talk about therapy and like, being able to get more in touch with your feelings, I do think that’s an aspect of it. You know, I feel like they were– I think so. I feel like there are moments throughout the list when I can, I can re-access the feelings I had and feel a bit emotional about a number of these things on the list but, yeah, that I mean that was a special one, and it’s cool because it you know, people talk, when you talk about country music, or like, performance venues, it’s like it pops up, you know, watch the Ken Burns documentary on country music and it’s, it’s so much of it is about the Ryman, it’s like, “Wow, I’ve performed on that stage.” You know, it’s like, Yeah. It comes out of the woodwork a lot. So it’s, there’s always an occasion to be grateful that we were on that stage again, which is really cool. Yeah. Yeah, so that’s, that I mean, that was, that was a number one worthy experience for me. But if I’m going to get to my number one, this one’s, this one’s related to Christy. This is a milestone that she experienced that for me was just vicariously through her. Excuse me. So, a little backstory, I’m trying to remember how much of this I’ve shared on the podcast? I think I’ve only shared. I’ve shared the fact that like, Christy has, she suffers from post-concussion syndrome. So it’s basically she has daily symptoms, invisible symptoms that originated over three years ago when she was walking into the grocery store and she stepped up on a curb. And just that simple step up. She hit her head, the very top of her head on a tree limb that, then she sustained a concussion. She was never knocked out. She never lost consciousness, but she sat back down in the car and gathered herself. Ultimately went to the Emergency Room and got got checked out and certified as okay, but that she did sustain a concussion and it needed to watch it. A couple of weeks later, which turns out is common with concussions that there was like, and she took a nosedive. Metaphorically, I mean, in terms of her symptoms got a whole lot worse after two weeks. And then, lo and behold, fast forward, three years later, she still has, like I said, symptoms every single day of what she calls brain fog, where it’s like, like your head is floating, you have trouble concentrating. She’s had a lot of issues with balance, and it’s just dramatically impacted her moment by moment, quality of life. And it’s one of those things that it probably took, it took over a year to come to grips with the fact that she has this condition, this catch all label, where you really don’t know what’s going on within the mystery of the brain. And there’s nothing you can do to just fix it. You know, there’s lots of things you can try. And she was trying all types of things. But she, she went on a friend of ours podcast, and I think that’s, that may have been the first time that I mentioned any of this was when, as a recommendation, I said, “You should listen to the ‘Ask Science Mike’ podcast, “Episode 180, called “‘Living with brain injury with Christy Neal.’” So if you wanna look that up, she in her own words, shares her entire story. I think that was in, that was the middle of the year that, so up into that point, you get her story. So again, I recommend that you listen to that. If you know someone who’s sustained a brain injury or you are suffering from one listen to Ask Science Mike, Episode 180. So she, you know, I was so proud of her in that moment where she was able to share her story and redeem a lot of the pain that she’s experienced over the years and hardship she’s been through in being able to share the strength that she’s found in that, in the midst of such a difficult condition. And the response has been overwhelmingly positive. And she, it was so, she was so encouraged. We’re all very encouraged to hear everyone’s response to it. And then, she was doing lots of things and going to see all types of doctors to try to continue to get better and slowly, very slowly over time she, she’s seen gradual improvement. But, I have, I still have an innate sense if I go into a space, that’s really loud, I kind of know the decibel level with which Christy can’t be there. You know, that like she, there’s too much sensory input. Or I can look at her face and tell when it there’s too much going on. She’s having a brain overload, that she needs a break, or that she needs to step away from the group that we’re with. I’m sure you, you know, you and Jessie also have picked up on a lot of this like, but at a certain point, it’s the type of thing that you don’t wanna keep asking every day, how are you feeling? Because every day it’s, I feel, I feel like I feel the same, or I feel horrible. I feel worse. There’s never, it doesn’t seem like there’s ever many days where it’s like I feel better, a little bit better. It’s this trajectory that if you map it over three years, you realize I can do things that I that I used to couldn’t do. But there’s never one day that you ask and decide, well, that’s amazing, I actually feel fine. It’s just didn’t happen. It never happens. So at a certain point, you start, you know, you stop asking because you don’t, you know, it almost it feels like it makes it worse to ask when, after years of the answer being something negative, that you’re gonna get that again. So, it’s kinda sparing her having articulate by asking and she doesn’t wanna share, and she puts on she, she puts on the positive face and she she goes on with her life because, because she’s got the strength to do it. But then there’s this there’s a silent, you know, there’s a silent condition, that’s with her every second and it’s not the type of, so, I mean, that’s, and then we went when we went to Thailand, and honestly, I think one of the reasons why the Thailand trip in retrospect is like lower on my list, to kind of make a little sense of that, is the fact that it was difficult for her, when her symptoms kind of flared up, especially when we got back. So from when we got back from Thailand, for weeks, it was like, it felt like she had taken a lot of steps back, like she was feeling horrible every single day. Again, there’s no, you can’t point to any one thing, but it’s like there’s, maybe it’s the time change. Maybe it’s all the heat that we endured there. It’s like you really don’t know. But she was just doing worse, and it, but it kind of led her to redouble her efforts to find other things that she could try in order to to experience some relief. It was very discouraging when after, after two and a half years or more things are getting worse you feel like, instead of better. But it’s, you know, it is tremendous credit to her that she, that she started going to new places and, and changing her regimen. One of the things that became a part of her regimen was getting in a hyperbaric chamber, where you, they put you under 4 psi, and you stay in there for like an hour. They said do it like 40 hours and then we’ll see how you’re doing. You do 40 more hours in this tank. And the science says that when you’re when you’re put under that amount of pressure it increases the the oxygen concentration in your blood and basically enhances healing of whatever the case, of whatever needs healing. Right. Lot of athletes use it, a lot of people like burn injuries, all types of injuries. So that was a drastic thing. I mean I went on eBay and found a used one and bought it to put in our bedroom, so she could get into that thing, because with such a hectic lifestyle, like traveling halfway across LA to get in one and and pay a fee to get in there, it just made more sense to get one. And I’m not going to say that is the thing that made her start to feel better, solely, ’cause there were other things that were changed as well but, and again, she didn’t talk about this on Ask Science Mike, because we didn’t have it yet. Right. This is after that, that was before the Thailand trip. But you know, we do think it was a major contributor to her starting to feel better over the last month or so, to a couple of months. And so my number one thing on my list is is when we were wrapping up the tour, I can’t, I can’t remember if I texted her first, but, you know, I got her on the phone, and she said, I did ask, “How are you doing?” ’cause it’s not like I never asked. It’s just hard to ask. And she was like, “I felt great today.” And then the next day, she was like, “I feel great today.” And then the next day, she didn’t feel as great. But there were two days in a row where she said, “I felt normal.” Like, it was for the first time in three years she felt normal, and it was, you know, I’m getting emotional just talking about it. because, I mean my, ironically, my number one thing of the year is something I wasn’t even there for, you know, I was, you know, wrapping up the tour a coupla weeks ago. But it, it’s been a difficult year in the sense that feeling so hopeless to do anything to help her. And also to help Mom, you know, it’s like the second, the second half of the year, it’s, I just find myself in the position of being someone who’s very close to a lot of hurt. And it’s you know, it’s just it’s been difficult. So it was, it was great to see Lewis back at home over Thanksgiving. And it was really great to get Christy on video chat and to see her face and to tell that I could see it on her face for the first time in three years that she felt good. And it gave us hope that, yeah, you know what, yesterday she had a migraine, she doesn’t get migraines, like. And then today she’s like “I still feel horrible. “I feel like I have a hangover from having this migraine,” which, you know, and again we don’t know why and it’s, but we have, we can look to these two days and say there was, there was this milestone, you know. We can cling to that and say “Somehow we got there, “and you know, let’s add some more days to that. “let’s keep, let’s keep moving forward.” So to me that’s the, because it, it obviously defines her life and it spills over to my life and the kids and I mean everybody that is close to her, but just to be able to see, just be able to see her have relief is, was huge. So that was my number one. Well, thanks for sharing that. Yeah, it’s a, and I think even talking about it like, again, I’m, to go back to the beginning of this I’m grateful that we have this exercise where we can stop and say let’s try to remember, let’s try to remember the things that we’ve been through to be grateful and to know how things impact who we are as people and to be grateful that we have so many opportunities to have so much fun and have so much, so many things that are rewarding. And even the negative things, like what happened to your mom or what Christy’s been going through or all of those types of things shape us into who we are. And it’s it’s not just what life throws at us, but it’s how we respond to it. And, er, Yeah, I think, you know, I think that the idea, I mean, it’s almost cliche at this point to talk about like being in the moment and being present. But I feel like, thinking through these, these moments, and the things that were the most the most memorable, the most meaningful throughout the year in realizing that there were a number of them, that as they were happening, it wasn’t registered, registering. Yeah. And I don’t know, I don’t really know what can be done about that, you know, and to just to some degree, it’s like, in some point, you might be a little bit, you might be difficult to deal with if you’re just like, every single time you’re experiencing something you’d like, keep quiet and you, and everybody tries to talk to you like, Yeah I’m experiencing the moment right now. Well you’d just be a weirdo. But I do think that there is– Maybe that’s okay, There is something to, there’s just something to having an awareness, you know, to use an overused term to have a mindfulness about what it is that’s happening to you. And if you get– In processing it. Or it, well, I won’t say or I’ll say and reflecting on it, you know, that’s why I’m grateful for this because it gives us an occasion to look at the whole year and reflect on it and say that, that was a, that moment was even more pivotal than I realized, or, or had the capacity to realize. You know, there’s the moment, I think you’re talking about the things like being on stage at the Ryman. It’s like, yeah, if you just pause for a second, we would know, and we did that it was, it was kind of career-defining for us. It was, it was so meaningful to us. But then there’s some things that blindside you, and then you’re just reacting. Or you’re going, you’re doing the best you can. But then taking the time to reflect and process and say, what did I take away from this? And for me, I’m glad so many of these things on our list, almost everything was captured in this podcast. I think this, I think Ear Biscuits is first and foremost, it’s for us for that reason, you know, and then secondarily, it’s for you to take from it whatever you’d like. And I think that’s why I cherish it so much, because it, it institutionalizes reflection as a part of, as a part of our lives. And we can always do more of it and it doesn’t have to be, it doesn’t have to be on mic. Well, and I do think ii’s the one you know, we get to do, we get to live our dream, we get to do what we want to do, right? And that kind of applies to every single aspect of our professional lives. So we’re making this decision to be like, okay, today we’re going to, we are gonna eat these particular testicles of this particular animal. We’re making that choice. Right. And loving every minute of it. But I would say almost everything that we do, can easily become work, right? It’s like,” Oh, this has become work.” But I think since we changed the way that we approach this podcast, I mean, I’ll be honest with you, when it was an interview with somebody, it was work for me. Yeah. It wasn’t that we didn’t have meaningful conversations with people, but it was like, you know, I’m performing right now, I’ve gotta, I’ve gotta do this research, you gotta understand what, who you’re you’re talking to and ask these questions. But, now, this is just, we’re just a conversation. And it is the one thing that we do that feels the least like a job. And I do think is therapeutic until you go to real therapy, this can be your therapy. And I’m not– I don’t think that’s healthy. I’m not licensed. I say that right now. So, we won’t go that far. I’m just a dude who needs therapy who’s been to bi-weekly. And I don’t mean twice a week I mean, every two weeks, therapy for a couple of years, but I’m not I’m not licensed. So, you know what, that’s the final frontier man. What? You’re in therapy. Think about when we’re both in therapy? What that’s gonna be like? Oh, man. Yeah, we should, that’d be good. That’ll be, well, we’ll talk. I’ll keep you posted. But, you know, thank you for, thank you for listening. Hashtag EarBiscuits, let us know. I don’t know, let it, let us know what struck you, what you thought about these, these things that we shared. This Ear Biscuit was a little bit longer, but hey, we’re taking a break longer. Just a bit longer. Two weeks. Two weeks. We’ll be back on January 6th Two weeks, so. Yeah, and you know, thank you for to, to those of you. I’m not saying that you don’t all get it. But when I was talking earlier about getting something like me and Shep, would get this thing, we get each other. Many of you have made it very clear both when we met you in person, but also via the online devices such as the Twitter and whatnot have made it very clear to us that you get what we’re doing here on Ear Biscuits, and recognize that it is special to us. I’m not saying from like an artistic standpoint like this is, this is like an award winning podcast. But I think what you do understand is that it is legitimately just us kind of having a conversation about life. Yeah. As it happens, and, you know, and you and let, thank you, we appreciate you appreciating that. It means a lot because we like having these conversations, but we can’t do it without you, because I mean, Yes we could. We could, no, we could talk. I’m saying we could just talk to each other. Yeah. But we wouldn’t record it and have it being produced into something unless you had or, you know, you had an inclination to enjoy it. So thanks for being there for us in another year, 2019. You did it. We did. We did it. We did it together. Let’s do 2020 together. Okay. Do you want to close the year on a rec or do you want to skip over that? Because it, I mean, there’s a lot of pressure writing a really good rec, because it’s gonna live out there for a couple of weeks. If it’s a bad rec, you might as well keep it to yourself. I, we’re gonna close with a rec. Okay, all right, here we go. Uh, I recommend this album, you know, it’s like, no, I recommend that you, It took discipline to prepare for this. It took some time. You know, I didn’t wanna do it at a certain point. I was like, oh gosh, this just seems like work. I’m like looking through my photos but I’m actually thinking I’m like wracking my brain to like, remember things that happened. I recommend doing it. We’ve said all the reasons why. So if you’re, if you’re on the fence, just carve out some time, 30 minutes, just like look back through your photoreel, your journals, your your calendar. That’s a good idea. Be one of those people that like, some people You mean like kids do it. They write the family newsletter and then they send it out to everybody that, I knew people who used to do that. I don’t know any people currently do that. But do it, do it for yourself. You know what, And then just make a list. A family dinner And share it with your people. I think, again, my kids, my kids are gonna hate it. They’re gonna hate it. They’re gonna hate it. They’re gonna be like, “Dad, this is so dumb” Start with, maybe start with top four. Top four things. There’s gonna be doors slammed, there’s all kinds of stuff gonna go down. But I’m gonna tell my kids my wife will definitely be into this. That you got to come up. I’m just gonna say everybody’s got to come up with their top three moments of 2019, and we’re all going to share, And one of them has to do with your dad. At least one. Right. All three good. Maybe two. Two out of three. Maybe two. Out of three have to be about dad. Three yeah, this is a good idea. Yes, This is like– And then you have this awesome family dinner. At Chucky Cheese. No, no at home at home. You need to be at home. You need to be at home. Hashtag EarBiscuits. You know what, enjoy the rest of your year. Good luck with that if you wanna do it. And we’ll see in 2020. 2020. To watch more Ear Biscuits click on the playlist on the right. To watch the previous episode of Ear Biscuits click on the playlist to the left and don’t forget to click on the circular icon to subscribe. If you prefer to listen to this podcast, it’s available on all your favorite podcast platforms. Thanks for being your mythical best.