[Music] welcome to earbiscus the podcast where two lifelong friends talk about life for a long time I’m Rhett and I’m link this week at the round table of dim lighting we got some catching up to do Rhett we haven’t talked about our breaks and here we are slam bam thank you ma’am right in the middle of 2023 in January well you know it’s not in the middle of the Year we’re in the middle of the start of the year so like is that interesting to you well what I was going to say was we typically are able to really successfully hide from one another the things that we’re going to talk about on your biscuits but there’s some circumstantial factors that have played into the fact that I feel like I’ve already told you a few of the things that I’m going to tell you again because oh I was hung out with friends if there’s not if it’s not Mike’s rolling okay I don’t listen to you I saw that you had a far away look in your eyes I just thought it was your new glasses upstairs still adjusting to them how are you processing the feedback because it’s one of those things where I don’t give a uh it’s one of those things where I did talk to Christy you made this Choice like you know in our world you made this Choice like a month or more ago six two months ago right to to I bought the glasses and I started wearing them in especially in my own time and on non-screen time but I try to avoid you know I don’t like to completely disengage from comments and and you know because I just feel like that’s too too disengaged from what people are saying but I try to just dip in a little bit and then it’s just of course because yeah I didn’t record it we’re recording this after there’s only a few episodes of GMM out for the year and people have opinions about your glasses oh of course they do I love that they have opinions and I do give a little bit of a let’s be real I give I’ve given it’s like you know the when you like when it’s rabbit turds you know you can almost eat those what because they love cereal I’m saying if I had you know what I’ll save them next time if I had to eat a turd the rabbit would be probably the first yeah but I’m talking about my turds that just happened I don’t want to eat your turds I have drank your piss before when I’m talking about rabbit turds I’m talking about through a filter my turns your turds okay keep going with this analogy that I don’t understand yet I it’s it’s a little oh you give a little I give a little rabbit turd about what people think about my glasses um but I’m determined to stick to my guns which is I liked these glasses I like them too I think you should I first of all when I have the Gray beard I can wear these glasses the gray ones or the clear ones but like when I don’t have the beard I really like the brown ones so I actually have the beard just so I can wear these glasses what happens if you wear the glasses with the beard I don’t think it the other one what happens if you have dark glasses with those that’s fine that’s fine but you can’t wear those without a beard that’s what I feel like why I don’t know it’s just something about the look of it that I you know that I that’s how I think about it but yeah I I know that people are talking about the glasses and that’s great it gives the people something to talk about because they want something to talk about something to Bonnie rate um I’m two for two man give me some more song song lyrics uh so yeah we’re gonna we’re gonna get into the stuff that maybe you’ve already told me a little bit about I’ll I’ll get into it I’ll tell you better I’ll tell you better last time I gotta be honest I think I’m dealing with just a little bit of a hangover this morning I’m in a bit of a I I have a tinge of Hangover in my experience it doesn’t take a whole lot of alcohol to put you in The Hangover State well I can’t tell if it’s from alcohol or if it’s just from hockey um well those are difficult too I think I have a hockey hangover last night I went with my my neighborhood friends this has become quite a thing I see yeah there’s a group of guys dads who um they discovered that somebody had never been to a hockey game this is not uh Lando football flag it is flag football friends dads yes same thing same group okay and um so we went to a what I caught told Christy this morning was the Sacramento Kings I was like hold on that’s not right it’s the la king she was like I know who they are they wear black and I’m like dang you’re right girl well I found it interesting when you were leaving last night and you said you were going to a hockey game and I said the Kings game which I’ve never been to and you’re like yeah and I was like how has that slipped under the radar for 12 years that we’ve been in Los Angeles right that they play at the Staple Center which is now called the crypto Center so when I said that this Sacramento Kings played at the Staples Center it’s kind of like true in a past World kind of a thing anyway listen to this man at the end of the game match thing they told me sorry hockey lovers you know what I’m just a newbie be patient with me um a dedicated Kings fan in full get up um there with his son kept leaning over and like emoting to his 15 year old son about things that were happening when the whole thing was over he turned around to us we were like on the fifth row it was like really gets really nice seats behind the plexiglass and um he said you know what there’s this was a really great game you guys saw he could tell that like we were had never been there before we just that based on what we were saying through the thing look me and a couple of other people I think he picked up on the fact that like we were coming to grips with professional hockey for pretty much the first time all you and all the dads no just me and like one other dad that was next to me and then there were a couple I mean one guy’s Canadian so yeah and then blood and then another guy is a physical therapist he craps hockey pucks yeah he does he does all Canadians do right that’s why even they’re rabbits hockey pups right you can see they build a lot of things out of them too because the way they stack them so this guy turned around and he was like this is a really good game a lot of things happened in this game that you that you rarely see a fight a lot of them happened well I mean there was um towards the end of the game there was that situation where they’re down by two and they don’t have enough time to come back and I’m talking about the power play um they took the they took the keeper out yeah and they replaced him with another player so the goal was just left bare ass open just I mean it’s just like he’s like been over a barrel back there yeah right uh with your britches but it’s so little that it doesn’t really matter or does it because so all the action was down here at our end when they were trying to catch up the king’s Kings won so it was the other team that was trying to catch up what was the other team the the white one you don’t know who it was uh it was Edmonton that’s a Canadian team yeah yeah which uh anyway some some one of the one of the key really paying attention really got the puck and I’m telling you he was still on the defensive side of the rink and he sat there and just like launched it shoot and it went right on the goal go that never happens I’m told this was after the first fight had occurred oh and let me tell you there was a fight man right there pushing people against the place of glass there was a dude like hitting the Plexiglas like people I I was like is that okay and they were like well he’s being a little obnoxious but it is okay is that okay and then the all of a sudden a second fight broke out like you know 10 minutes later how long did they let it go on um first one not too long second one a little bit longer and it was like right there in front of us that was amazing but how committed my experience with hockey fights is that it’s like it was like they were smiling it’s sort of like yeah we’re doing this it’s kind of a routine almost like I’m not actually trying to really hurt you well the thing that um my Canadian friend explained to me was he was like yeah that’s um speaks English he speaks English interesting I was like they measure the hits like you look at their the scoreboard and there’s the score which I totally expected then underneath it there was like hits they count the hits and display them this is when it a hit is when you have the puck and then somebody hits you like checks you like they measure that for what well he said somebody to bet on he said it’s a probably he’s he said it was a measurement of like taking a toll on the other team it’s just something they’d like to match Street Fighter hitting each other so then uh will the physical therapist he was explaining to me he was like um there’s gonna be another fight I was like what it’s like sneezes it’s gonna be another fight I didn’t think they fought anymore there’s always another one and then that’s when the second fight happened and then when that fight was over he was like yeah this I I was like how did you know that was going to happen he was like well that I could tell that they were getting real chippy with each other and I was like I can infer what that means and then it it creates like a an energetic shift in the game so so fighting is actually used as a technique to shift the emotional energy like to in your favor which I never thought about it yeah yeah it’s like it’s like decimating the other team like if you can it and on the other side of that second fight yeah I mean the energy was totally different another thing talking about energy that I didn’t know about hockey was he said you know if you look they are subbing themselves out every 45 seconds or so like in the middle of play you’ll just see a group of people jump over and then a group of people Retreat to the to the bench and he said because they’re going at such an intensity that they can only last for like 45 seconds you can relate to that right is this a sexual joke yeah that was a sexual joke okay it almost landed I don’t even think you were listening it landed he glazed over man uh see I lost interest this is the point where I need to punch you to really change the energy yeah I mean you’re talking about yeah okay so but yeah they have to they’re going at such an intensity that they gotta that they gotta rest constantly because the game is so fast like I much respect to the hockeyers yeah I’m just gonna tell you right now it’s better than the soccer it’s like soccer but a little a little too cold I’m gonna dress warmer next time but it’s fast and it’s intense could you keep up with the puck and then um kinda and then I’m like what is that on the uh on the ice there’s like something here there’s something there there’s four of these things and then I look up and two and lo and behold my friend was right they some two players had thrown their gloves to the ground yeah and then they were they were they had their Dukes up and they were about four feet from apart from each other just squared off like two boxers in a ring yeah and everybody just started backing away that the ref could have easily just right there in the middle of that and said nope everybody just backed away made a circle and they were duking and then they just started like punching each other in the raw face but but not like not as aggressively as this blood dude no no it’s not UFC but there was blood coming out of the game they’ll knock their teeth out yeah I mean that’s crazy three fights I’m never going back it’s never going to be that good again uh I’ll give you a hundred dollars if you could tell me what icing is uh well I’ll let’s see I don’t want to spoil it but I’ll I’ll tell you on your birthday well that was your opportunity to say what goes on a cake and then you would have gotten it easy well that’s kind of what I did Rhett uh get it your birthday oh that was pretty good see it was I’m a thinking man comedian I’ll give you a hundred dollars come on man you gotta hey I’m you are you hungover come on man I think it must be contagious slap yourself you know the interesting thing is that um I kind of got a I got a little bit of a uh uh inside look at this over Christmas that’s what I wasn’t even gonna tell this story but I now that you’re telling it you can’t resist my father-in-law is the official dentist of the Carolina Hurricanes and they met they say the fewer teeth that they have the better player they are yeah and uh we played poker one night uh with him don’t tell me you use hockey teeth in a cut in a in a couple of his uh dentists and some other guys okay and one of the dentists was sitting next to me and was basically saying yeah I got a I gotta go in in the morning it like it was like I go in on Christmas Eve or something it was going in at a time that he wasn’t planning on going in because he had to do some because somebody got their teeth knocked out and of course he couldn’t say who it was like he couldn’t tell us a mixed company because this is all this is Doctor patient privilege HIPAA stuff so he can’t like discuss it openly with people like me there but he was basically I got to go in you know there was an accident or whatever but if I could tell you who it was you would know him of course you probably could have watched the game and and or the match and figured it out but yeah I mean it happens on such a regular basis that of course not only is this like a sponsorship kind of relationship but uh and and by the way anytime you want to go to if not if you’re a hockey guy anytime you want to go to a Carolina Hurricanes game back home they’ve got a box because they’re the official dentist of I Want to Be Right Carolina Hurricanes if I can’t slap the plexiglass oh that’s a problem I don’t want to go but you get free food I don’t want to go further away you know me I’m not big into food I’m more into Just Hockey like it’s all about the game to me at one point I started talking to um my friends about um well you know how often how often they have sex and my ad during the game yeah my Canadian friend said this is the type of thing we should talk about over coffee yeah yeah I’m glad they’ve got I’m glad they’re holding you in line a little bit and not letting you dictate that conversation yeah I’m the low man on the totem pole over there it’s nice because you know here I just I just riding High I get away with everything [Laughter] um hockey man so they didn’t they didn’t they didn’t volunteer that information but if they did you would now tell it to all of us on a podcast uh if they told you how often they had I got I got some good data uh I had a lot of sex over my break um I’ll talk about that in a moment um but first I guess in some sort of vertical uh bite-sized form is on is on Snapchat sounds pretty awesome sounds pretty awesome to me you know I don’t I don’t I don’t go on Snapchat we are where you are if you’re on Snapchat then conveniently you can you can we can be there with you here biscus is supported by chime do you look at your credit score every day not every day but you know who does chime does with their secured chime credit Builder Visa credit card you can start to build credit with your own money chime reports your payments to credit bureaus to help you build credit over time there are members see an increase of 30 points on average all of this with no annual fees no large security deposits or credit checks needed to apply this would have been uh helpful to us right after we graduated college and because with the state we had left our apartment in by writing our names in the bottom of the bathtub with that scripted grip tape my credit score my credit score tanked at that point I don’t know what happened to yours man it wasn’t good it took years to build back up we could have used chime at that time but it wasn’t available so start your credit Journey with chime sign up takes only two minutes and doesn’t affect your credit score get started at chime.com ear that’s chime.com ear the time credit Builder Visa credit card is issued by stride Bank in a pursuant to a license from Visa USA chime checking account and 200 qualifying direct deposit required to apply for the secured chime credit Builder Visa credit card regular on-time payment history can have a positive impact on your credit score impact the score May Vary and some user scores may not improve out of network ATM withdrawal fees May apply except at money pass ATMs in a 7-Eleven or any Allpoint or VISA plus Alliance ATM so your your your break I feel like I want to hear about your break okay I can I can uh I can scratch that itch for you yeah yeah my break started uh it will summarize it was a trip to Raleigh to North Carolina and then it was home of the hurricane followed by a trip to Mexico with just my wife oh yeah oh yeah let’s start though let me set the scene for you December 20th at Los Angeles International Airport okay we’ve never flown on that particular day would usually fly 17th maybe 18th Jessie’s birthday is the 18th so we typically try not to travel on her birthday and we are usually in North Carolina for her birthday kind of times out most of the time so we get in there and have like a week before Christmas we were like let’s have her birthday here didn’t we do something for her birthday remember that yeah yeah oh we missed the last time I saw you we were at a party bus oh gosh we did we run at a party bus that’s a story in and of itself it’s full of glitter oh my gosh it turns out oh good yeah man we gotta tell this story right well I didn’t think about this first of all it wasn’t my idea to do the party bus and also it was it was Jenny Mike’s wife it was her idea to do a limo because we were talking about what we’re gonna do for Jessie’s birthday and she’s like well let’s get a limo and Jessie’s like that’s a great idea turns out in 2022 when you request a limo it’s not going to be like the limo that took us to prom which is like a long Lincoln it’s going to be most likely a party buddy because it’s just got more room and you can stand up inside no stripper pulling this one unfortunately but um it was so anyone stand up well you can’t but I can barely stand up in there it’s kind of a last minute thing but um great idea you’re um you well your wife had a little trouble yeah she I you know she gets car sick I’ve told I’ve told the stories over the years of like just the art of pulling over and getting her out quick enough so that I can start filming with my phone before she actually starts wretching into the ditch like I’ve gotten really good at that like yeah pull over Park whip out the phone before you post that on Snapchat I post that on Snapchat yeah that’s the only thing you post on Snapchat but see your biscus is on Snapchat do you hear that yeah I heard about that if you want to watch your biscuits there you can um she gets car sick so like uh she she got carsick pretty quick right before we left your neighborhood before he left before and I was like within one mile we got a ways to go and then we kind of like roll the driver to roll the window down so we could see him and we taught Christy into asking him can can is it okay if I sit in the front seat with you I’m getting car sick he was like I would love for you to do that but I don’t have another seat and we quickly put together yeah well first of all he didn’t he didn’t there’s the obvious reason for this because the you don’t want a sick woman the drunk right it doesn’t have to be a woman I mean she is a woman but you don’t want the person who is most likely to vomit to be up there with the with the driver no matter what gender correct right right in this case it was your wife though right and also Mike was uh a little cartoon he was getting car sick but he just got quiet whereas Christy kind of like she was in the front and we were all sitting in the middle in the back you and I were by this point you and I were in the back and we were having our own little conversation you were showing me something on your phone and which is a great way to get car sick which is probably something on Tick Tock and Christy was up at the front turned sideways kind of in a vertical fetal position like and I kind of leaned over you I was like if she vomits I hope she does it down into like the floorboard so when we open the sliding door it’ll just kind of like Cascade out this is what I was saying and you’re showing me something on the phone and you know and it’s all like Poor Pitiful Christy you know it’s like You Gotta Laugh to Keep from Crying that’s kind of how I felt about it and then she was having a tough time but then all of a sudden kind of like you know how in Lord of the Rings when like Gollum is talking to himself and it’s like Smeagol versus Gollum and like who’s gonna win and then he he you know he turns his his um face away from the camera and then all of a sudden he turns back and he’s like and it’s like oh Gollum wins like there was the Christy version of that where like all of a sudden she whips around and looks straight at me and you and she’s like don’t you think about putting this video on ear biscuits she thought you were filming her she was jumping to the conclusion that Not only was I filming but that we were planning on posting it we would never do that we would I mean we wouldn’t even talk about it on your biscuits right we wouldn’t do that we wouldn’t even do that we wouldn’t recount the story in detail no uh but she did make it but it she didn’t make it there she did not vomit but she she wretched at one point she did a dry heave oh yeah did you not notice that the thing I didn’t understand is why we didn’t give her something to do it in because you’re talking about doing it on the floor I don’t want just a loose vomit inside of my party bus you know what I mean like it’s posable put it yeah but we don’t have a hose right now at the moment yeah I didn’t have a bucket yeah but at least I was thinking about it a little bit could have given her like three champagne glasses fill these out she’s like you could just it’s like a bartender that we should have given her a receptacle is all I’m saying yeah poor girl uh so it was it was pretty shaped up it was pretty funny um trying to trying to just like how much not partying was happening on this party bus but you got to go back to your story dude I mean we haven’t even gotten your vacation oh um we were talking about the airport I don’t know what day you flew but I’m I just have never been to LAX when it was so crazy now I show up as a policy I’m a typical dad or you know I get there early my rule is we get there two hours early right which is what they kind of tell you to do but a lot of people are like oh you hour and a half but I tried to get there two hours early well we show up and it is just a mad house Bedlam and we have to go to because Shepherd is 14 and the way that we ended up like putting the the we were all in the same reservation but typically you can’t just get a boarding pass for a 14 year old you have to get into the I need assistance like I need to talk to an agent line which is what we always do yep I don’t do the I don’t know I so we get in that line and I’m like this line is moving very very slowly and it’s very very long and I’m not that good at math anymore but it doesn’t seem like we’re going to make it and then I ask one of the representatives of the airline that we were flying I was like you think we’re going to make it we got a flight to RDU and she says uh I don’t know I’ve got to see how things are shaking out but we recommend that you get here uh four hours early for domestic flights and five hours early for international flights during this this time of year at LAX oh God and I began to panic a little bit and I this is one I have some certain I’m going to talk a little bit more about some things I learned about my own anxiety over the course of the vacation but it’s well established that I have anxiety not about the process of flying but the process of of check getting not being late not missing the flight yeah okay and having to introduce like complications where you have to then get on the phone with somebody I get I actually get anxious thinking about it because I hate having to like figure logistical things out even though it’s just gonna be me like texting Kara and having her do it even that is just you know it’s very stressful for me and so um and also you know very slight PTSD from getting stuck in Atlanta Georgia for three days one day because of a flight missing a flight not nothing against Atlanta just wasn’t expecting to have to get all my clothes from Target um for three days but the uh so at that point I panicked a little bit and I said well I’m gonna go out to the uh skycap you know check out on the curb I left the family in line I go out there and it you know it’s a shorter line it seems to be moving pretty fast so we get in line there and then we get up to the guy he’s like everybody here over 18. first I mean my heart just immediately like goes to my throat I’m like no he said oh you can’t check yeah you can’t check in here uh mm-hmm because we were actually on three different confirmation numbers so you had to get back in the other line no I said he I think I’m just gonna I don’t know the guy’s name maybe he was an angel you know how we have experiences with angels me and you all the time and I said um Michael listen we all have the last thing last name and uh we’re all different confirmation numbers but we’re all in the same family and he was kind of like okay let me see what I can do I don’t know how this stuff works I don’t know like this is a policy but I’m about to violate the policy and then so he goes to the process and he’s like give me a second I’m I’m gonna go see if I can figure this out and I like pulled out a plug you know you tip these guys that’s part of the deal but I pulled out a 50 Bill I just have to have a 50. no you didn’t I was like thank you and like as he’s leaving to go like handle I like give it and escort I mean Hey listen it works wow he came back and he had Shepherd’s boarding pass we’re good to go we made the flight I just it felt incredible he may have done it without the tip I mean I was gonna tip him anyway but I would more than necessarily going to give him 50 bucks um gee I don’t know what standard tipping for the sky cab guy is I usually throw them a couple of 20s which I guess is 40 dollars so maybe I was maybe it was that is that is forty dollars um two times twenty is 40. never forgotten that so anyway my vacation started with this like elevated heart rate you know okay A little bit of a almost crisis now none of my family’s freaking out they don’t care that’s why you’re freaking out because you have you’re you have to do it well it’s up to you I feel responsible for you you know you are um because that’s a gift you give them but when because when me and you travel I don’t feel that way like I don’t I don’t have a lot of anxiety about like I’m just like if we miss this flight I mean I’m not as lackadaisical as you as you the way that you approach flights but I’m also like hey if we miss this flight like we’ll get on another one we’ll tell a story about it but the family is just like especially around Christmas because you get it I get it I get it you’re worked up um it’s understandable now not a whole lot happened in North Carolina it was a quick trip skip that man uh I will do one highlight though oh let’s hear that so we’re still um the the cabin uh that I’ve spoken of before is not currently habitable because my wife is having her way with it uh but this will become the place that we stay when we go to North Carolina one one year uh down the road this coming Christmas but uh I noticed that some have been eaten my freaking log cabin when you you I saw that you posted a picture of wood but yeah I didn’t realize I didn’t put it together that that was actually that it was a real that it was a real that was a house that I was being sincere no I just thought it was like a wood pile it was just the corner of a log cabin where the wood comes together and you know before we got this thing it was all like sealed and stuff inside it was inspected like I knew that there was not this like raw wood and you know as I’m not there on a regular basis and so like you’re checking in and we did we did some work and and we met some guys out there to do some work but I’m looking at this and I’m like I didn’t want to do this because I don’t really like to do the whole like here’s a problem for Twitter to solve because you know you’re going to get like 95 just yeah why don’t you do it that way well what was the other way to do it Reddit yeah well Google can you Google an image I tried that yeah you can do that I tried that huh so crowdsourcing uh I saw that Alex punch gave you a smart ass response I knew I was gonna get a lot of smart ass responses and actually it was sort of like I was like okay I’ll be entertained by the smartass responses they’re teaching not to take it too seriously but I hopefully will find the correct response because I was like this can’t be like a beetle or something like it looks like something was gnawing on it but like what then I was like is a you’re like a beaver that I don’t think beavers would do this like a beaver coming from that Creek you know behind the house and like coming up there like no beavers they like cut down trees to put and make a dam out of I don’t know they’re trying to cut down my house and make a dam out of my house it’d be a cool thing to document but one guy responded and said I am a pest control specialist in North Carolina and I am 100 certain that it is squirrels squirrels because this time of year squirrels are collecting wood for their nests so they’re taking their little front teeth and they’re just kind of Shaving off like the out the layer and apparently your house is being eaten by square apparently you can put something on the house like once you like sand it down finish it you can put something on the house in those places to keep the squirrels but it’s also because we haven’t been there and squirrel’s like nobody’s homeless eat it you know let’s eat the home now that no one’s there so we gotta I mean it’s like a cartoon you come back next time and like half your home is gone like in kind of like a in a squirrel organic shape I don’t think they’re going to eat much you know what you need to do man you know what you need you need some really responsible handy squatters you just need some people to squat keep an eye on the place how about just do the squirrel a mannequin on the front porch or a mannequin on the front porch I think it’s a mannequin with a mechanism what a mechanism a mannequin that looks like he has like a 22. yeah just a mannequin with a BB gun there can be a like it could raise he could raise the BB gun and then the little speaker could could do like a countdown from a dramatic countdown from 10. Like Home Alone nine you want me to Macaulay Culkin my front porch yeah I do tis this was the season I like this idea well I don’t want to talk about Mexico I mean I’ll hear a little bit about your trip before I continue on with my trip I experienced the airport if we have to go there again uh I don’t want to do it on let’s see we picked up my mom on December 20th I think wasn’t it like the day the day we were leaving you were picking her up yeah I think maybe it was the 19th but like we go to pick her up and she like I said she calls me when she lands and then I’m like text her I’m like get your once you get your bags and come out to the curb then we’ll come up and get you because you don’t want to have to park you know I I wanted to avoid parking and then about that time I hit this traffic and like we could not get into the airport and then I couldn’t get in touch with my mom like she was not answering the phone it had been uh 30 40 50 minutes since we talked I was like she’s definitely what’s happened she’s got a North Carolina only cell phone she’s not she’s not in communication and I can’t get to her I don’t know where she is and then we’re like driving around and it is bedlam people trying to get picked up and I’m like Christy we just need to start looking maybe my mom is out here my mom this is the first time she’s ever traveled alone and here she is at LAX who knows where like out of like Out Of Reach and I was like she’s supposed to be at Terminal I guess three it was I can’t remember so then at Terminal 2 Christy looks up and she’s like there she is and this had been like I’ve been worrying for like 45 minutes and then she like instantly saw her and like get her in the car and my mom’s like sweating profusely and like talking about how I’ve been trying to reach you I I use this stranger’s phone and I got them to call you too and then all of a sudden and she was like it was it was all I could do just not to burst into tears my poor mom is trying not to cry the whole time and I’m realizing that my phone is the problem you had like notifications you had like it I don’t it’s one of those inexplicable things where you just need to restart your phone so it like it says it is connected but it no longer was something about how many people that works of LAX I felt so bad it was my fault not to be critical if you’re playing um but uh I would have suggested you with your mother traveling alone for the first time that maybe the the uh parking and meeting her inside was probably worth the headache oh yeah we were I was willing to navigate at an airport I was willing to do it yourself you know what well you know what we threw her in the deep end and she swam out and it’s good it worked out everybody’s everybody so she wasn’t mad at you no no that’s good uh there’s I mean there’s a sweet lady yes sweet lady PTSD but okay um so Mom stayed at our house we had a great time and then we flew back with her and saw everybody but then like turns out Chrissy’s side of the family was sick so like we couldn’t we ended up not seeing them and it was only a few days home so he’s on my side of the family we had to get we we had a good time um it was short and sweet we get we get back home um and then we just take it easy you know I didn’t go to Mexico or nothing yeah uh I just took it easy I got in my uh my pressurized tank my healing tank trying to like make sure that this bone is oh you got in the Hyperbaric I got in the Hyperbaric a lot taking naps it was like it’s like my little it worked kennel well um I’m actually going to the doctor in a few hours to get an x-ray to make sure that there’s Union well it looks like there’s Union I’m no doctor it still feels a little weird but um maybe it’s just that I need to I need to get into with that PT I’m feeling good though I’m feeling good about it so not too much to report from my uh my holiday beyond that I think I was just thinking about you in Mexico just hoping you were having a grand old time I had a great time so the the impetus for this we knew we wanted to do some kind of trip and you know as originally planned it was with our children oh um but I was like y’all y’all want to go to Mexico for a week we were supposed to do this last year by the way covid canceled that so I had I was kind of playing this mental game of not fully committing to like gotcha simultaneously being very much like way more looking forward to being on vacation than I should have the way that you usually look forward to a vacation and you think it’s going to solve all your problems and be this incredible reset but then the other part of my brain was like it’s probably not going to happen because somebody’s gonna get covered whatever uh-huh but when we asked the boys if they wanted to go it started with lock and he was like ah you know I’m coming back from school and I really want to see my friends in Los Angeles who were like okay and then Shepard was basically I don’t want to go by myself and nobody would really have no friends to take because they’re doing their own thing so I was like okay we’ll go by ourselves we’ll we’ll sacrifice for you guys just go on a vacation just the two of us which means that lock and Shepherd would be home alone for a week in Los Angeles by themselves 18 year old 14 year old who never been responsible for a home and our two dogs yeah so there were a number of heated uh interactions leading up to that which where I there were some things that happened in the days leading up to just going to North Carolina when when lot was already home that kind of demonstrated and reminded me that they’re just teenagers and they don’t clean up after themselves and they leave stuff hanging around all this stuff I was like you can’t leave food out to kill these dogs you know like we have like very dad conversation with them and like you got to make sure you can’t leave the door open and then go outside like basically now it’s just kind of worried about the dogs it’s just to be frank yeah and um but we eventually got to a place where I said if the house is clean and the dogs are alive and we return then I will be fine okay and then uh some friends ended up coming through town and eating the place to stay and I was like yes please stay at our home adults right so they only ended up having like two days alone so that ended up being fine and I was actually thinking it was going to affect my enjoyment in Mexico because I didn’t want to be thinking about what was going on in my house and like having to check in constantly but this is the longest trip that well I mean I’m not 100 sure about this but I think this is the longest trip that just the two of us have had since our honeymoon because we just don’t go on vacation just the two of us I mean we’re going like a weekend trip but we can get away seven days but yeah seven days and a few highlights I mean we were in Playa del Carmen which is actually where we went on our honeymoon and oh but we were kind of like at a resort that we left just a couple of times it was definitely like focusing on the chill aspect of a vacation and trying to just completely unplug and enjoy ourselves nice and which came at a really good time for both of us Jessie said the busiest year of her professional life and so she’s been like you know running like crazy we had a crazy year as always so it’s the break is always welcome um I swam in a Cenote Cenote three cenotes I’ve seen pictures of these it’s like like an aerial photo of a Cenote is this like jungle but then all of a sudden there’s like a donut hole in a jungle and it’s water it’s like a but it’s like a so it’s like a pond but not like the it’s there’s like it’s deeper it’s a lot essentially a cave that that has an opening somewhere to the surface and it’s you know it’s it’s in areas that have a lot of limestone and I don’t know exactly what the process is but any place that there’s a lot of limestone at one point that was ocean and then it’s like over time it kind of drains out and reveals this like swiss cheese essentially like the the Earth becomes swiss cheese that is filled with water okay and at some point apparently the these caves didn’t have water in them and like people could kind of walk around and then in relatively recent geological past they have filled up with water and they filled up with like pristine crystal clear water is it it’s rain water or like groundwater or ocean water salty it flows to the ocean they flow to the ocean and they are fresh water they’re fresh water oh and the action and like so we went with uh a guide uh whose name was limbert limbert uh who was actually um with that name you may not he was local he was local and he’s kind of a archaeologist historian like he gets his uh he gets his like license as a as like a historical guide to this region of Mexico he like gets it updated every few years so he’s like this dude knew a whole lot and he’s also I didn’t know this and this is just ignorance on my part but like if you had told me like okay uh are there Mayans still around I would be like well yeah I’m sure there’s like descendants of Mayans and the Mexican people or whatever but like Mayans and and Mexican people are it’s two distinct groups okay and the and the Mayans they’re still like millions of people who are like of my own Heritage and speak Mayan like he grew up speaking mind of course you speak Spanish as well in English really um but he was like telling me about and it’s like you know there’s Mayans who are in Mexico and Guatemala and you know down into Central America still millions of people and still like a very intact culture there with their own language and customs and everything and so he’s like tell me about his grandmother and and they have like a real tie to the land and the cenotes and all this experience of uh all the history of what they used them for and you know he’s like clarifying things about like people think they sacrificed the dead in these but really what it turns out they probably did is that they like had buried people and then they took their bones and they would put them in the Cenote like after they were clean I learned a lot of really cool things huh this is not a history lesson and I’m gonna get uh pieces of it wrong but we swam in three that day and we swam in one that was half open half closed so like I can’t it’s like here you go here’s a lake sort of area and then it goes into a cave that you can swim through and comes up into another Lake area and when you swim through it’s a there’s enough air you don’t have to hold your breath to go from one to the next it was there was never a place that we had to completely do that well so the second one the second one which was the crazy one which was a completely enclosed one that had a stairwell I’ve got pictures of all this that if you’re watching on video you’re seeing right now but we went down these stairs and they had like built the stairs and built some things into the bottom of the thing that kind of made it feel a little bit Disney world-ish you know what I mean like how far down did you go like what was the depth of stairs 30 feet to 15 feet oh okay it’s kind of like just underneath the surface of the of the of the ground okay and we get now there’s there’s hundreds of these I don’t know how many there are like and you can tell pen Peninsula but it feels like there’s hundreds of them and just on this one like piece of land that we went down this dirt road like we’re passing all these signs he says each one of these is a Cenote that you can swim in so when we get to this one there’s no one there oh wow and he took us around to the back like it’s just beautiful water and they put lights in the water so people could like go down there and you give you a snorkel and you can kind of like swim around it’s like 76 degrees or something so a little a little cold water but like not too bad and it’s that way all year round you know he takes us around to the back and it starts getting darker and darker and darker he’s got a little flashlight he turns the flashlight off you can’t see anything and it feels like we’re just like 40 feet into this dark area but we can’t even see the light from where we came from and then he’s like we’re gonna go down into this little river this little stream and we’re gonna swim in this stream and swim back around and I’m not claustrophobic but I was thinking a uh my wife is not the most uh what’s a nice way to put this um Jessie is Clumsy self-admittedly clumsy and I was a little worried about her she doesn’t have a lot of like she’ll step on you you know what I’m saying like if you’re like in a room with her you know you don’t watch her she’ll just step on you okay like walking past you by accident she’ll step on you she’ll she might elbow you in the middle of the night in bed that kind of thing as a big man I’ve always tried to make myself small and be conscious of that so maybe it’s just because I’m big and there’s I’m controlling a lot of things so I I typically don’t accidentally hit people but my little wife hits people all the time maybe that’s how she sees it’s kind of like her version of sonar speaking of that I mean it’s a bat I’m gonna blow your mind she’s a touching bat I’m gonna blow your mind about bats as you know I have a fear of them we swam around this stick around for that we swam around this little thing and he would turn the light on and he would shine it down into the water that was like deep like okay we’d be like going along like crawling along and like 18 inches of water and then it would suddenly bottom out and we would look and it would just be black and there would be a rope coming up from the Blackness and he was like that’s the line that the scuba diver’s taking it would go into this cave and they’ll swim to the next Cenote oh so yes totally scuba the cave to the next thing like an underwater Trail and with a rope and now you being scuba certified and me wanting to be scuba certified but just not really having logistically lined up the time to make that happen because Shepherd I you know I floated the idea to shepherd He was like a very very cool thing we call it the four of us could go together but going into these caves and seeing those that was like I want to do that so he was putting the flashlight under the water yeah yeah he had like a like it was like a diving flashlight if I do is like we can’t keep this light on too long outside of the water because it’s not made for that it gets too hot diving flashlight you should probably have one of these uh Chase has one so I just used his but what I did is I would dive down and grab onto the rope and pull myself for a little bit I went down like 20 feet and did like adjusted my what my ears and like pulled myself and then I realized that my lung capacity is just like dwindled so severely over the past like 10 years because I haven’t been doing stuff like that holding my breath yeah but also I was like oh if you have a scuba situation you don’t have to hold your breath uh I can’t you need to have another level of certification that I don’t yet for caves for caves yeah you got to be trained in how to do that but you’d be willing to you’d do that with me yeah yes thank you Rhett for the invitation well I’m just saying some people are like I’m fine with scuba diving but they get claustrophobic about caves I I don’t I’ll think about it after I’ll think about it while I’m doing it be like why didn’t I think about this before I did it yeah that’s what I want to do and because you’ll be there you’re going to be in charge you’re going to have to be very in charge no we’re gonna go with somebody who’s in charge because I’m not gonna worry about anything I’m not going into a cave that somebody who has been in there many times who is leading us I’m not gonna I’m not some I’m not exploring okay I’m not exploring the caves I’m holding on to a line that somebody else has put in there whenever we talk about caves I always go back to my junior year when I went on a summer project in Santa Cruz and we some of our friends from the project met some like students at like I guess at UC Santa Cruz and they took us to some caves these are not water caves these are just normal caves I think they’ve been covered up since but and we just had like a little flashlight not even a headlamp like we were following we were like on our bellies crawling through this stuff and it was so claustrophobic there was one point where we had to it’s like it got so crunchy like so crunched down and small like it’s like all right this is a like a four foot divot that you got to get through this to get to the other pocket so you and in order to get through as skinny as I was I had to empty my lungs yeah I don’t like no I don’t like that hold my breath with my lungs empty and then crawl through like that’s crazy and hold on if you had to do that to get through how did anyone else get through it was a bunch of it was a bunch of scrawny people there’s no way I would have gotten through it you didn’t know where you would have gotten through it I don’t like that I can’t believe I did that that’s being claustrophobic like I don’t want to be I don’t want to be squeezing through something that’s just plum crazy I don’t want to be squeezing through something where I might get stuck I don’t like that idea where if you decide to breathe you’ll you’ll get stuck and if you gotta and when you’ve got this tank on that limits your moveability too you know yeah but they’ll start at one Cenote and they’ll just die and they’ll come up with another one that’s cool I would definitely want to do that we were going along so back to Jessie for a moment she’s clumsy we’re going along and we kind of get to this place where we’re starting to get where we can see where we’re headed where the light is in the main cave and he’s like pointing something out and I just like look at Jessie and she just sort of just like she kind of stands up a little bit and then you just completely just like Falls over like it just hits a rock with her shoulder like I don’t it was weird like from my perspective it was as it was as if she had just like turned off you know what I’m saying like from the back it was just like she stood up power down and she but she had like stepped on something soft and her foot kind of went down and so for the rest of the trip she had this like bruise and like scraped up shoulder she was fine she didn’t like make a big deal about it when it happened but I was like baby you gotta watch yourself gotta watch yourself and she told me she told them everything that she was clumsy and he laughed I was also thinking uh I don’t know how often limbert brings people into this particular situation but uh I can see a lot of people like this isn’t the kind of thing you could bring like 20 people in their Grandma through you know what I’m saying like you didn’t uh yeah somebody’s gonna get hurt somebody’s gonna hit their head I hit my head on one of the Stalag a types uh one for top and I was like hangs tight to the ceiling t for top yeah that’s what I think of and then stalagmite M for um maybe not don’t worry about it if you know tight then you know the other ones because I I thought it might be stalagmites fall on you no that’s it’s the opposite I screwed it up for you so um but then we get to this point and he says uh look up and I look up and I see just a couple of feet away from me hundreds of sleeping bats a couple of feet away from you just like you kind of waited and he shines and it’s just like they’re just sleeping everywhere and there’s like like a a bat blanket oh you hated that what did you do in your brain uh was what what could I do panic I mean like you can’t get away from them and I was like did you have a fear response even Jessie did because it was like it’s just kind of creepy you know to like see all these like animals that are kind of like hanging there are they gonna fall and aware that were they fluttering occasionally like a couple of them would like move a little a little well they were kind of like a couple of them would be moving they don’t have wings man they have hands with skin well that’s kind of what wings are wings are just arms that evolve into but now with feathers but not with a bad dude they’re still hands with skin yeah um when we got back out into the main area I started realizing they uh that there was several that were flying around and that’s really the thing that gets me is a bat that’s flying around because of that time Heather dinklers got one right on the back of the neck you know we’re outside in North Carolina and I I don’t know I feel like through exposure therapy this trip changed my relationship with bats because after that I started realizing that there’s bats everywhere in Mexico uh where we were at including the resort every single night because there’s there’s a Cenote on the resort that we ended up going to we took a little bike ride around the nature trail and God took us in there and showed us all the baby bats ooh and there were bats flying everywhere but were they do keying on you interesting they’re constantly knowing they’re constantly guano is it a verb because it’s like probably not such they’re constantly guanate yeah guanine into the water and we asked the question which you were in so we’re in this water and you were telling me earlier that these this was the drinking water for the Mayans and he was like he explained it again details I don’t remember the guano does not make the water uh not potable like it’s still completely clean based on the the process that’s happening and the constant like inflow and it’s it’s doesn’t make never made them sick it doesn’t make anybody sick and there’s literally hundreds if not thousands of bats in every one of these caves just constantly guanating into the water huh that’s not a problem not a problem it’s not a problem it’s not a problem Guana iguana isn’t guano is not a problem it’s not a problem um okay I’m gonna get to the anxiety in a moment and I had another uh it’s one it’s one of these situations where something happened that then I interacted with the internet and now I’m going back to contextual contextualize of the situation okay and that was um I told you about this ahead of time I told you that I had purchased um a matching set of a short sleeve shirt and shorts yeah to wear on my vacation yeah that’s right uh this is not a first for me uh you might recall the watermelon set that I had in Mexico maybe five years or six years ago that’s right uh so this is something that I am known to partake in while in Mexico apparently and while watching season two of White Lotus which I gotta say seems to be more and more recognized as being better in the second season in the first season just so you know I mean that’s kind of that’s the way the tide seems to be turning interesting um but what’s her name’s fling boyfriend from England in the in the show the quote nephew the nephew is he he wears this outfit during the show and I had seen that outfit advertised to me on Instagram because that’s how Instagram works it gets into your head and knows exactly what you like and ended up purchasing this set but I went with the pink one because I was like mix it up a little bit go pink good I think I should have gone green there’s green and there’s Navy and there’s pink I went pink okay yeah actually I think the green was sold out in my size maybe that’s what happened anyway I was trying to figure out when I was going to wear it on vacation and since we were spinning every day man since we were spending a lot of time at the resort and it was a nice place but what I was Finding is that people just kind of show up at the restaurants in the resort in a they’re not like hey I’m in a matching set you know what I’m saying like it was it was more like I’ve got on shorts and a I got on mine people weren’t dressed up but it was kind of like I don’t know I got the thing I’m gonna wear it what’s their problem and um I wore it that one night and actually one of the the couple that was sitting next to us was like oh he like said the brand the brand is uh Dandy Del Mar free free ad for Dandy Del Mar oh yeah not a sponsor and he’s like Danny Del Mar nice this is Danny Del Mar he was wearing a shirt see so he was dressed and I and I was like uh you guys watch White Lotus and she was like I feel like I’m living it and um okay and and then I was like yeah the nephew wears this this outfit and that I saw it and I was like I’m gonna get that for the trip or whatever but at least we talked about it but then I like okay we didn’t have a converse much of a conversation with this couple then we go back to our dinner and I say to Jessie I said my outfit is not making me feel like I thought it would just a moment of vulnerability with my lovely wife and then her immediate response is you should tweet that she’s like that sounds like a tweet that sounds she was like that sounds like a relatable tweet and I’m like I don’t want to tweet I want to see this patient I saw that but okay go ahead and so that she was like here I’ll take a picture of you I’ll I’ll take a picture of you and we’re in this like restaurant that’s kind of like it have to it’s like indoor outdoor beautiful place uh where like the canal in the middle of the resort kind of comes up to where our table was but there’s like people including a family of like Mom and Dad and three kids sitting over there and I’m like I I you know me I don’t I don’t like to be I don’t like to stand up and be like I’m getting my picture taken in this outfit I don’t like to do that and but Jessie was like just do it I was like okay this is funny this is for the internet so I stood up and I kind of like made a face that was like capture the idea of I don’t feel it’s like this this outfit is not making me feel like I thought it would yeah I saw that picture but what I did is I tweeted it without attaching the picture and then I replied to the Tweet with the picture so Jessie you know she’s my social media manager um that’s how you got to do it and uh she explained why that was the thing that I needed to do I’m just I just follow the directions I do what she tells me to okay and uh as Jessie was taking the picture of me standing out there by myself the mom from the family that was watching said um if you want me to get a picture of both of you just let me I I can get a picture of both of you and instead of just saying okay yeah just say okay please I said uh you said okay you don’t worry she um and now more people are listening other tables are listening because I’m having to say this to this woman across across the restaurant oh here’s what it felt like don’t worry don’t worry she this is for Twitter uh yep yeah yeah you made it worse and I think the upset her you know because I’m it you know she offered to take a picture of us and it was like no no this is just me I want my wife to take a picture of just me for Twitter this is a joke like I’m doing a joke for Twitter you’ve said plenty yeah to her um so they must have thought oh it’s a Twitter guy Christy saw this picture before I did and I’m across the room petting my doggies and she goes red just posted a picture of him in an outfit and I think it’s the same one that you bought I hate to break it to you but I looked at the picture and I was like well his is pink mine is green oh I almost got I would have gotten the green one if I didn’t have the side if they’d had him I had my side I had forgotten because you did tell me the whole you said I bought this thing I’m gonna wear it to Mexico you mentioned that to me because we were talking about White Lotus I’d forgotten you said that and then I was like I need to get some I want to get some loungewear for whenever I go to Mexico and I bought I found myself on the site and I was because I just searched uh Resort Wear and then that’s the site that came up yes it’s the site for that and I got to I I was gonna get the blue one but they didn’t have my size so and I wasn’t gonna get the pink one so I got the green mushroom I got in the pink and let me tell you man I I’m not going to make the mistake you made I’m gonna flaunt it hard I’ma show up to places and they’re gonna be like who is that well is that when you put these when you put these things on the internet uh that’s fun now first of all and I’m not gonna make that face you made in my pictures I’m putting it on the internet as a way to entertain of course but as is always the case whenever you put anything on the internet people think you’re making what people are searching for compliments people think that oh maybe you are here maybe he must be well here’s what I did it’s okay if it is uh well I’m not saying that every picture I put on the Internet is there I’m there are pictures of me that I would post on the internet that I am in some part of my brain fishing for compliments but because I have very specifically did not want that to be the case in this one I was like you made that face I’m gonna make this face and I look and I looked at it and I was like my legs look weird you know like my knees looks fat or something like this fans misinterpreted the face as he needs accomplished some some people of course some people did that but then a lot of people uh took it upon themselves and that’s just totally fine to explain to me why it wasn’t making me feel like I wanted it to feel and it was that it was it was too close to my skin tone I’m too pink to wear pink yeah which you know uh maybe that maybe that’s the case I I should have got the green now you’ve got the green I can’t get the green um but I also uh Maybe maybe at some point we do go to Mexico together and we wear that we we wear pink and the green maybe I get the blue and the blue and the green I bought another one and then I wore it downstairs and Lando and Christy said you got to return that from the same site no from a different site you want to see this picture because I’ve I’ve returned it yeah you’re making it you’re making a face at me it doesn’t work does it she said I look like a little Dutch boy um like I want to be a Little Dutch boy I feel like I mean I just feel like walking around they’re kind of kind of pushing it a little bit the shorts are are too small but when I looked at the models their britches were that tight too it’s all about the look on your face it’s what but and I didn’t have the right look on my face um but actually I kind of do have the right look on my face you don’t look confident enough oh um okay yeah I don’t um we had an excellent time did you though um I’m glad we had a lot of made a lot of love uh that was one of the goals you know you want to make a you want to make love at least daily so we did that a couple times twice for seven days that’s impressive dude I mean at a certain point you’re just like well let’s do what else should we go to you got to mix it up a little bit I mean skit I mean I wouldn’t have held it against you to skip a day I would still be like Wowzer that’s good man well it was a little bit of a goal okay there you go you know so you actually you use both set out to be completionist about it we just talked a lot about the sex that we were going to have in Mexico well you don’t Build It Up two and so and then we then we fulfilled that oh wow we delivered on that so but you were like every single day we’re not going to miss a day did you have to talk about I think I said something like that I was like well we should I mean would you do it every day and question mark um submission accomplished there submission accomplished yeah we tried a little bit of that yeah yeah I wore a caller in my pink outfit can I borrow the pink outfit nothing is to be too big for you well maybe that’s what it needs it needs a little drop shadow it’s a double X like that I had to get a double XL in that shirt okay that’s how small that size runs all right um so I uh I noticed something about myself when I was on vacation and this is something that’s actually always been present but I it hit me in a way that it hasn’t before maybe it’s just because you know cumulative years of therapy at this point make me more sensitive to what I’m actually feeling and thinking um good so I was like we had a really crazy year last year you were there um yeah but unlike some previous years where I feel like there are things on the horizon of the new year that could be a source of anxiety for me it felt like a lot of the sources of anxiety came to a close we got answers on things at the end of the year I filled out and I’m looking forward to have been looking forward to this year with much more anticipation than anxiety very excited about everything that we’re doing in mythical and the stuff that we’re making and the ideas that we’re talking about so it’s more just like a giddy like maybe there’s an impatience of like wanting to get to it but not an anxiety about it yeah not even really an anxiety about is is it going to perform well or people are going to be into this new stuff that we’re going to try I’m kind of like I’m not really doing it for that anymore yeah so but what I found was I would find myself trying to relax into a book or just a chair in having this anxiety and then immediately the what I always have always done is like you feel the physical anxiety and then you stop and you try to find the source of the anxiety in your brain right yeah and then you’re like oh it’s that it’s that thing that I’m thinking about it’s it’s the kids at home and when something’s gonna happen or it but then I I started talking to Jessie I was like you know I’m beginning to realize that I have always had a Baseline of anxiety but I’m always because we’ve been so busy for so long always able to immediately um track it to something that I can then put myself into and I don’t have like a Solve IT dissipated address it yeah and I’m not like um external and so and I don’t think I don’t think I usually present as an anxious person maybe to you sometimes or to my or to Jessie you know more often or whatever um but I’ve never been like oh I’m I’m I have an anxiety problem or I have an anxiety disorder and I’m not saying that I do maybe I do I don’t know I’m still exploring this but what I did what I did find is that oh no I actually like if you if there was a dial and there was a baseline of anxiety I realized that my Baseline is elevated and it’s a physiological thing that doesn’t necessarily have a source my brain senses that my and I’m not a psychologist but the way that it feels is as if my brain senses that my body is anxious and then it provides the source of the anxiety for itself to then try to figure out and solve and so then I’ll do something like write a bunch of ideas down or figure this thing out or like you know come up with something or execute something and then it dissed my anxiety dissipates because I’ve done something I’ve identified the source and then I’ve gone and tried to do something to solve it but you’re saying that there’s no that’s not the Full Source like at this point I’m saying that because those things weren’t there I’m saying that it’s not it’s not linked to any particular actual thing any reality it is a physiological Baseline that I’ve been operating at this heightened level not like debilitating but Annoying and sort of obvious present level of anxiety and it’s why I’ve never been able to relax on a vacation I always look at a vacation as an opportunity to accomplish something like okay seven days in Mexico yes you’re going to have these things that you’re going to do but really you’re doing this so that a you’ll recharge your battery so that you can be fully charged at the top of the year and get all this stuff done or you’re gonna like take in some information that then you’re going to be able to translate into something that you’re going to accomplish or you’re going to have this moment where your brain gets silent and then you come up with this great idea and then you get back and you tell link about it like but but I realized two things one the Baseline of anxiety exists apart from circumstances so that’s the first thing that I’m and then and then I try to come up with something to explain the anxiety and what that causes me to not do is to actually acknowledge that oh no you’re just there’s there’s anxiety there that doesn’t have a source other than just your disposition and you need to explore that and not Define some event or something that you’re anticipating but all but to just acknowledge that oh you have you have this disposition how can you go about addressing how can you go about addressing this Baseline and change your Baseline which I don’t exactly know yet I’ll talk a little bit about some of the stuff that I’m doing but but like low level anxiety is something that is that exists it seems like that’s what you’re describing but because for so long my remedy to the anxiety has been identifying the problem then immediately working towards the solution I’m not very good at enjoying a vacation right and I’m also not very good at uh and this is an overused term being in the moment and I’ve always I’ve always known that that I’m not great at being in the moment but I didn’t really understand what that meant and I don’t fully yet but I’m beginning to think things like you are about to go swim in a Cenote right mm-hmm swim in this Cenote uh uh as well as you possibly can like experience this as fully or only yeah yeah don’t like fully but don’t be yeah like you don’t have to nothing else has to be figured out right now you don’t have to be thinking about anything you don’t have to be thinking about how all this thing’s happening I’m going to talk about it on your biscuits which is it has become a factor with a lot of things now um but just be like no you’re having this dinner right now you’re having this moment with Jessie right now you’re having this moment with your kid right now whatever it doesn’t have to be on vacation and being present for that um and just kind of uh recognizing the pattern and when you so when I feel the anxiety right now what I’ve been doing is just stopping and doing some box breathing which I know you’re familiar with but you know it’s just I mean you can look it up but it’s essentially breathing in holding your breath breathing out holding your breath and then repeating the process some people I call it Navy SEAL breathing and that you you know it and it’s actually been truly transformative in just like the few weeks that I’ve been doing really so I’m just trying to break the pattern of like when I feel there’s this low level of anxiety chasing it and I would be like okay well what is that let me there’s there’s it’s funny it’s like when I turn towards the sources of anxiety there’s like it’s like a bunch of little anxiety guys in a line like here I’m hey I’m here and if like you move past him it’s like oh I’m here like there’s at any given time and this is true of I think everybody there’s at least a dozen sources of anxiety there’s a you know the busier we get the more sources there are but they’re not starting realizing oh actually it’s not about those things like those things just happen I can address those things when I need to address them on the SK at the scheduled time that I need to address them but kind of just saying I’m going to put my hand up to the little anxiety guys lined up and I’m just going to do something to address the physiological response that I’m having so box breathing again it’s not I had to kind of get out of my head and thinking that I’m going to be able to address something solve a problem and then reduce the anxiety and just be like if there’s a pre-existing physiological thing that’s happening in me that’s causing anxiety maybe there is a existing tool physiological tool in this box breathing that I can do that addresses it without having to bring in a problem to solve and it has been pretty TR it’s been transformative been doing it quite a bit and then it’ll be like oh you’re calm now that worked now and and then also adding on the and what are we doing right now can you enjoy that and realize that you’ll get to all those little things that are lining up you’ll get to well I want to hear some of that breathing I want not right now I’m saying I want to hear you I want to become aware that you’re doing that when you need it well then I feel like you’re watching me oh I’ll be listening but um I told you that I’ve been doing more breathing and then Christy was like why you keep doing that what is that she started getting annoyed by it yeah well because it sounds like you’re sighing yeah it’s like what’s happening to you over there you’re like are you disintegrating are you like flopping flopping over well that was that all right that is I’m gonna Co-op that as my wreck man try some box breathing yeah it’s a good wreck I didn’t have a wreck for this episode and I knew it was mine boy I’ve been anxious this whole episode about that this has been fun to catch up you know what mission accomplished let’s close with some box breathing you breathe in hold one two three four exhale one two three four now hold what oh my God it’s funny I mean so you do that you do like six to eight minutes you want uh I do find that uh I there’s all kinds of uh different versions of this but one that I found was somebody that talked about doing a double breath because one of the things that you’re doing obviously by doing this is like you’re getting more oxygen because maybe without even noticing it as you’ve been you’ve been breathing shallower and shallower as you’re anxious but you’re kind of like you’re getting more oxygen you’re clearing out the carbon dioxide but a double breath this is pretty interesting so you when as you breathe in if you breathe in and then you realize I can actually breathe in again quite a bit more than I just did in like a second breath on top of your initial breath that feels pretty amazing it hurts it hurts I’m stretching my lung oh all right makes you a little light-headed but it feels so good be a part of this conversation hashtag here biscuits or in the comments on the YouTube video which now comes out two days after look at that the audio version ear biscuits is Monday Wednesday and of course call us and let us know how your processing reacting to these conversations and well you know what we might just let everybody hear it 1-88 earpod one [Music] hi I just wanted to share my experience with making a list of my top moments of the year uh it’s something uh that was obviously inspired by y’all your top moments of the year is pretty much one of my favorite podcasts they all do every single year I decided to start tracking in my phone my favorite things every single year and it was pretty awesome and it was really refreshing to have this list of my favorite days of the year that I could always kind of revisit in my phone and anytime I was going through a dry stretch where it was maybe a few weeks maybe more than a month without one of those special days I would be able to look at just how many there were in the past and know that there’s plenty more amazing days in the future so it’s a really rewarding experience and I thank you all for inspiring me to do that to watch more ear biscuits click on the playlist on the right to watch the previous episode of your biscuits click on the playlist to the left and don’t forget to click on the circular icon to subscribe if you prefer to listen to this podcast it’s available on all your favorite podcast platforms thanks for being your mythical best [Music]