Welcome to “Ear Biscuits,” the podcast where two lifelong friends talk about life for a long time. I’m Link. And I’m Rhett. This week at the round table of dim lighting, we’re going to be finding out just how good or bad of a rider we each are. A rider. A rider. You’re not talking about a horse rider. Rider. A passenger. You’re talking about a… In an Uber. An Uber rider. Mm-hm. Okay. There’s now a way to find out. Maybe there’s always been a way, and no one explained it to me. Okay, all right. And I know that you’re also, like, really big into a new thing that like… You’re so excited, you can’t stop talking about it. The funny thing about it is, is like, it’s become so much of a bigger thing because we’ve almost included it in the past, like, three episodes, and- Cut for time. Yeah, it’s the thing that keeps getting cut for time. Cut for time. And now it’s kind of built up. You know what? I’m not gonna disappoint you. I’m not gonna disappoint you. Oh. I’m potentially gonna change your life. Well, I have something to add this week. So, you might get it cut for time. No, I’m going first. No, you go first, okay. What? Well, Link, last episode, you asked me to make you a vision board based off of your passions, and I made you a vision board. Ha! Really? Yes. Well, now I feel like I should have ranked my passions. Yeah, you should have. I would’ve made you one too. Oh, okay. All right. Did you go a little rogue? Well, don’t tell me. Yeah, you’ll have to see it. All right, I’ll have to see it. Oh, I got a vision board. Where is it? How big is it? I have it hidden. It’s hidden under my desk. Must not be that big. Yeah, I have it hidden under my desk. It’s little? Is it frameable? It is. Anything’s frameable. Speaking of frameable, one of the best Christmas gifts I got, I still have not put up on my wall, and it was framed. Lily surprised me with a… She emulated, like, a concert poster, like a venue poster. But it was… Link and Lily’s listening party… Spa listening party or something. Hot tub… It’s not in front of me, so I can’t remember exactly. Hot tub listening party. And it was like it was an event. ‘Cause we would get in the hot tub and listen to music, and- How did she- I would turn her on to some music. How did she have it made? She just had a friend who was a graphic designer who, like, made it. Isn’t that sweet? Oh, that’s so sweet. It’s so sweet. And it’s so sweet that I haven’t- My kids have never done anything that sweet for me. I haven’t put it up. Haven’t put it up. How big are we talking? You know, it’s like a 11 by 17, you know, it’s like a… Well that made you feel special. Made me feel special. And now I gotta follow through. I gotta put that thing up in my… I think I’m gonna put it in my office, in the creative house. You know, it’s like I can put anything I want on my walls in my office. It’s a great reason to have a creative house. I don’t have to have like, buy-in from, you know… Can’t put it in your bedroom. The family or Christie. Christie runs point on like the aesthetic of everything in the house. And this doesn’t quite fit, you know. That’s why my realm is the garage, but I don’t have any art hanging on the wall in the garage. There’s no room for that. Yeah, there’s like equipment. Cabinets and equipment. Toys. Yeah. You know, that reminds me. Something that I talked about with Jessie recently that I failed to talk about on the podcast. And this is something that I built up years ago and you know about it. Yeah, that’s right. I know what you’re talking about. ‘Cause I, when you talk about something framed in the creative house- The best gift you’ve ever gotten. I built up that Jessie had gotten me the best gift that I’ve ever gotten. And I recently had a discussion with her and with some friends who were looking at it, and I came to the conclusion that I did want to talk about it, but I do not want to show it. But I wanna talk about it. Three years later. It’s two years later really. Yeah. And I wanna make sure… Right? I mean, I think it’s been three years. I don’t know. I just wanna make sure I’m getting… What are you doing? What are you googling? Oh. I’m just making sure that I’m getting his information right. Okay. So… What it was was, Jessie has a friend who used to run or be associated with an art gallery. And there was an artist, this pen and ink artist, named Ronnie Ray, I think Ronnie Ray Mendez, who is just a great like pen and ink, you know, artist. And he had… I don’t think he had done this particular thing before, but Jessie was talking to her friend and she was like, “Rhett really likes pen and ink and I’ve got this idea where I wanna like, give a pen and ink artist like information about him and us, you know, as a couple. And like, can I like write like a story about him, like his life. And then have somebody create like a pen and ink drawing that is representative of Rhett.” And when I say pen and ink, you know how detailed it is. But when I say pen and ink that’s literally like four feet by three feet. I mean, the thing’s this big. Yeah, it’s huge. It’s the width of the couch in your office. And the way she got me with this is she was like, “It’s gonna be your birthday present.” Then it was like, “It’s gonna be your Christmas present.” It kept getting pushed back because it was… He was making it. It was so detailed. It was so detailed, and I don’t know if he had done one this big before and he’s like so talented and so committed to like, making it amazing that he just was like, “I’m gonna work on this until it’s done.” And she’s like, “It’s fine.” So it was an autobiographical piece of art. And the reason I don’t wanna talk about the specific… Well, lemme tell you the story of how she revealed it to me. She was like, “I’m gonna give you this present, but we have to drive to this place in the valley.” And like, we kind of drove to like some, like, a weird part of the like western side of the the valley. Okay. And I was like, what in the hell is this gonna be? And then all of a sudden, like, we pull up next to this car and there’s a dude in the car. You were like in a Walmart parking lot or something. It was like a parking lot in a strip mall. Oh. But kind of in a weird, like a weird strip mall had weird stores. And we get out and she’s like, “It’s in the back of this guy’s SUV.” And I’m like, “Is it a dog?” You know, when somebody has got you the best gift they’ve ever gotten you and they’re taking you into a parking lot and then you’re just opening the back of this guy’s car. It’s probably illegal. And he is an interesting looking guy, you know? I was like, what does this guy have in his truck? And then she opens it up and there’s a sheet over something and then he like, takes the sheet off, and like, I had no idea. So all of a sudden I look at this thing and I’m like, holy shit, this is like this amazing drawing. Yeah. But then she was like, “Well look closely at it.” Then I started looking at it. I was like, oh shit, this is custom and this is for me. And then she’s like… Then he hands me this, or no, she… I can’t remember who had it. This like manila envelope that had the story in it, which is like, this is the information that she gave him to then have him create this artistic representation of my life and like our life together. And so it’s just, it’s so personal that I kind of want it to be something that’s just like, you can come into the creative house and see it if you’re my friend, but I don’t wanna like show it to the internet. I just felt bad because this guy Ronnie Ray worked so… Ronnie Ray Mendez worked so hard on it that, you know, I mean, I paid him for it, of course. But like, he’s so good at what he does and he does… This isn’t the only thing he does. He does other stuff too, but… He worked on it for over a year, right? No, it wasn’t a year, but it was months. It’s not his full-time job. He has another job. I can’t remember what it is, but… So this is like a nights and weekends kind of thing, and you can only spend so much time just sitting there and get… Like, when you look closely, you… You can stand there, I’ve had friends stand there for 30 minutes looking at it, and then I’ll be like, well, this means this and this means this and this, I don’t even really know. Maybe Jessie knows. Like when I was looking at it with Jessie a couple weeks ago with some friends, she was pointing out things that I was like, oh, I didn’t realize what that was for. She remembers because she gave him all the prompts. It’s kinda like a, it’s a fantastical representation of your life that does require like, kind of telling a story in your mind or like making connections between your life and this. It’s like, it’s very cool and like the style is very intricate, but it also kind of shifts. There’s like some very photorealistic parts and then there’s like some super fantastical parts and it kind of all mixes together. Yeah, it’s like a giant landscape kind of… When we’ve been brainstorming, like, the last time we were brainstorming, we were in your office and I just found myself kind of staring at it because it can kind of send your mind in a bunch of different ways. You know, it’s like, oh, there’s a nature part and there’s like a car you used to drive in it. It wasn’t even a car that I drove. It was a car I wanted. That’s right. Yeah. Okay, I’m not gonna give any more details away, but it definitely blew me away. That’s probably, I mean, that’s an heirloom. That’s a hell of a gift. It is the best gift I’ve ever gotten. And of course I haven’t seen the vision board that Jenna made me- Of course. But that’s not a gift because I commissioned it as a… You did it in working hours. Well, yeah. Maybe you didn’t. All right, I’ll take it as a gift. You might have to take some time off. I had a lot to do. I had a lot to do last week. Have some time off. Yeah, you got a lot to do, so… I had a lot to do. In other words, I need to love it because part of this is a gift. You don’t need to love it. I need to love it. I’m really putting the pressure on. But you can’t tell you that you want me to do something, and then me not go and do it, even if you’re joking or not. That’s true. I’m excited. Okay, before we talk about… Before we dig into our Uber ratings… And so we get to see our Uber ratings. Oh God. Okay. Yeah yeah yeah. Okay. This is pretty exciting. This is a long time coming in celebration of the five year anniversary of the Mythical Society. Of course that is our exclusive fan club where you can pay at different levels to receive things that are worth what you’re paying for. There’s also an initiate level that is stark raving free. And you can just check out everything we have. Five years of accumulated exclusive content, growing every week. We have now gamified the Mythical Society app, right? So there’s the app where you can enjoy everything from the society, but now you can play along every day with Good Mythical Morning, even as an initiate. You can have the free initiate level. Now what does that mean to play along? Sometimes we play games and you can’t play along because you get a different experience comedically by knowing the answers. So we’re not talking about that as much as… There’s some ways that like our competition can relate to your competition. But then there’s this other forms of knowledge. You’ll have to play it to see. It’s trivia based. It’s trivia based. Called Think It and Sink It. Get it? And you can accumulate a score. We almost called it Think Make Me Horny, but… Yeah, we didn’t call it that, But it was a close second. So you wanna play over the course of the season and then we’re gonna be recognizing… There’ll be special prizes at the end of this next season of Good Mythical Morning for those who have accumulated right answers. So that’s pretty cool. Pretty excited about that. We give out exclusive quarterly collectible items like physical collectible items every quarter over the past five years. And they’re only available to third degree members who are members at the time. With some stipulations. Always valuable, super collectible, and then they’re gone. But if there’s some that in the past you wish you could have gotten, now is the time to get those while supplies last. We have like a little additional inventory of some of these things. Like whether it’s one of the exclusive albums we released or the comic book series that we… We’ve released three editions of that. You know, and if you want to get all those, or if you want like the blanket or the hoodie blanket thing, like, all the super cozy stuff we release exclusively. Like, any new purchase, upgrade, renewal or gift, any way that you can get a third degree annual plan through January 20… I said January, I meant February. Through February 29th. If you sign up for any… I’m not doing a good job of saying this. That’s why we wrote it down. And I should just read it. If you get a third degree annual plan in any form, including a gift card, through February 29th, you will have the choice of any of the past quarterly items we’ve ever produced while supplies last, first come, first served. So go to mythicalsociety.com for all that stuff. “Ear Biscuits” is supported by Chime. You know, I pretty much put all my purchases on my credit card. You know? I plan to pay it off in full every month, but like, I run it through that to build my credit. You know what I’m saying? I know what you’re saying. You’re talking about building credit, Link. I’m talking about building credit, Rhett. No matter how you’re starting off the year, when you use the secure Chime credit builder Visa credit card, you can build your credit scores with on-time payments for everyday purchases. If there were an overachieving credit card that helps you build credit, this would be it. When your credit’s good, your future’s also good. There are no annual fees, interest or credit check to apply. And you can use it everywhere Visa credit cards are accepted. By the way, you get a checking account too. To set up a qualifying direct deposit, sign up for SpotMe and Chime will spot you up to your limit when you make a credit card purchase or cash withdrawal that exceeds your balance. Plus you have access to over 60,000 fee free ATMs easily found on the Chime app. That’s more than the top three national banks combined. So start building your credit. Open a Chime checking account with at least a $200 qualifying direct deposit to get started. Get started at chime.com/ear. That’s chime.com/ear. The Chime credit builder Visa credit card is issued by the Bancorp Bank, NA, or Stride Bank, NA. Members FDIC. Out-of-network ATM withdrawal and over the counter advance fees may apply. Call 1-8-4-4-2-4-4-6-3-6-3 for details. Late payment may negatively impact your credit score. Results may vary. Early access to direct deposit funds depends on Payer, SpotMe eligibility requirements and overdraft limit supply. “Ear Biscuits” is supported by Rosetta Stone. You know, sometimes you travel to other countries, Link. Like, you just traveled to New Zealand. And sometimes you need help understanding the people in that country. Well, a lot of ’em speak English. Oh, okay. Well maybe this doesn’t apply as much, but what if their accent is so strong that it sounds like another language? In comes Rosetta Stone. Not exactly, it’s not for accents. I mean it’s for accents within languages. Just let me stick with the copy. Rosetta Stone is the most trusted language learning program available on desktop or as an app, that truly immerses you in the language you want to learn. They’ve used trusted experts for 30 years with millions of users and 25 languages offered, some of which include Spanish, French, German, Korean, Chinese, Japanese, Dutch, and Arabic. I don’t see New Zealandish on there. But probably because that’s English. Or Maori. Rosetta Stone immerses you in many ways. There are no English translations, so you really learn to speak, listen and think in that language. And with their built-in true accent feature that gives you feedback on your pronunciation, you’ll be speaking like a pro in no time. Plus, it’s an amazing value. A lifetime membership has all 25 languages for any and all trips or language needs in life. A $399 program but with our code, you can get it for just $199. Don’t put off learning that language. There’s no better time than right now to get started. For a very limited time, you can get Rosetta Stone’s lifetime membership for 50% off. That’s 50% off for unlimited access to 25 language courses for the rest of your life. Redeem your 50% off at rosettastone.com/ear today. Okay, Link. It’s a lot of fun over there. So Jamie found this TikTok that was going around and it basically, it’s this woman who is saying… I don’t know if it’s always been there or if they just recently- I don’t know either. Made this available. But I’ve know for the longest time you couldn’t see… I thought the impression was you couldn’t see your rating. Like, you knew your driver’s rating, but you didn’t know your rating. And I always wondered like… ‘Cause drivers can rate you. Oh, they do rate you. Every time. Oh. AI was kind of thinking, oh, they don’t rate me. So I’m gonna show you how to get to the ratings and will show you, as you are listening or watching. So you can look at your ratings too, if you use Uber. And I’m interested to see… I had some things that I was a little bit worried about. Yeah, I’m worried about some things. So I’m interested how our ratings compare. And then why. Well, you know, I just recently went on an Uber against my will. That’s my fault. Why don’t you tell ’em, Rhett, what you did. So Link and I typically do not carpool unless we’re recording an episode of “Car Biscuits” for the Mythical Society. Right. But we live relatively close to each other and we work very close to each other. So sometimes it does make sense. You texted me as I was about to leave one morning and you said, “Hey, can you gimme a ride?” I was like, “Sure, bud.” I didn’t call you bud. I’ve never never called you bud seriously. But you know, something like that. I’d like for you to do that. And I picked you up and I brought you in. And of course the understanding was- I felt so seen at that moment. The understanding was that I would also take you home. Yeah, I didn’t wanna- I forgot about it. I didn’t feel like- I don’t always take you home. I needed to establish that, but it’s like, yeah. I actually said in the text, “What are you doing at the end of the day? Can you gimme a ride in and and bring me back home?” Oh, you did ask for… You covered both. I did say that, ’cause I didn’t wanna ask for a ride in and then be stranded. Listen, I have no defense here. This was 100% my fault. I came in here to record an episode of “Dispatches” from Myrtle Beach with my dad and boy, we got on a roll. Yep. You know, when I start talking to my dad, boy, we get on a roll sometimes. And I was, you know, had that wonderful time with him. And I step out of the booth and I go right into our office right here, right behind us. So close. Share a wall. It’s the type of thing that if you decide, you know what, I’m gonna leave… I’m just gonna leave work, you might be reminded ’cause the the next door you see is the one that the friend that you brought to work is behind. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Still working. I knew you were still in there, I just forgot I brought you to work. And going out into the parking lot and not seeing your car did not… No bells went off. It didn’t, did it? Well, a big bell went off when I went into the pitch black office of ours. Like there’s not a light on, there’s not a soul. There’s not a trace of- Oh, come on, I didn’t turn the lights off. There’s not a trace. I didn’t shut down. Of humanity. I’m not a light turner offer. That’s you, man. I mean, I should be more responsible. It was a desolate in there. And my heart just sunk. And I’m like, oh my God, I’m stranded. What am I gonna do? And interestingly, this is actually kind of a… I feel like this is more of an offense for me to do it to you than for you to do it to me, because you really hate Ubers. You really hate… Yes. You hate having people take you anywhere. You don’t even, like… Just to be honest with you, like, anytime we have to go to the west side, like if I don’t say anything, I know you’re gonna be like, “I’ll drive.” And like, I’m always like, he’s got some reason that he wants to drive. It’s probably… I’m not even gonna ask, but I don’t mind not driving. It’s a win-win. So I’m like, you don’t like to be driven anywhere. Okay. You’re bringing up a couple of things here. You’re highlighting why I’m so nervous about the fact that now I’m about to see my Uber reviews. I’m a little nervous because I thought I just had immunity and I also knew that I was always upset when I’m in an Uber. And I got to tell you what happened with the Uber that you stuck me in too. But before I get to that, I just as a side note, want to say that, yeah, whenever we have to drive to the west side, I like to be the one to drive because… I like driving. You know, I enjoy it. I like getting places fast. I thought it was because you were less… You were more likely to get sick if you were riding. I’m also more likely to get sick, especially- ‘Cause we have to go over the hills and stuff. Especially when, if I’m in the passenger seat, I can’t be on my phone. And like, if we get in a conversation about something, it usually requires some form of like phone work. Like, and then people are communicating with us. It’s during workday, there’s like work is happening and we’re being slacked and stuff. And I’ll get sick if I’m on my phone. So I can serve the duo better by being the driver. And then you can be on your phone and you can actually do things. You also like to type. I don’t like to type. I like to drive, I don’t like to type. And I can’t do it in a car anyway. So this is a win-win. I’m not complaining about it. Yep. Because my driving’s not bad. I mean, Stevie is scared of me driving for some reason. I know it’s ’cause I’ve almost hit pedestrians. I’m a little bit scared of how you drive. But like, we get there. And I think I get there pretty fast. You haven’t actually hit any pedestrians. I have not. You’ve only almost hit pedestrians. Right, right, right. There’s a big difference. You know, if you actually hit somebody, we got a problem. If you almost hit somebody, it’s sort of like, it’s almost like you didn’t hit ’em at all. Exactly. In fact, it’s the same. Yeah. Missing a pedestrian is not ever hitting a pedestrian. Right, it’s like they weren’t even there. Right. So I’ve missed a lot of pedestrians. Almost counts- All of ’em. Almost counts in horseshoes and hitting pedestrians. I don’t know, I’m trying to… Almost doesn’t count in horseshoes, but it does count in hitting pedestrians. Almost… Almost… Almost… Almost only counts in horseshoes and hand grenades. It does count. It does count with pedestrians. And it does count with pedestrians. No, it doesn’t. If you nearly miss a pedestrian, you have not hit the pedestrian, so it doesn’t count. Just one little thing. First of all, I already did apologize to you in real life. Sorry for leaving you. I feel like I deserved it. I will say- From the Emmy’s thing. I will say it was the day of the NCAA football championship game, which starts at 4 fricking 30 on the west coast. And so yeah, once the end of the day started rolling around, I was like, and Locke was still in town. I was like, oh, I’ve gotta watch this game with my son. And so I left work early and I mean… Conveniently forgot about me. It was like remembering your friend or watching football with your son. I’m sorry, I gotta get my priorities straight. I gave you a hard time over text. I was like, “It’s not a big deal.” I mean, I could have gotten a ride with somebody here, but I, you know… I had already asked Jenna to make a vision board. I didn’t want to ask her to take me home. I did offer, I was like, “Do you need a ride?” Yeah, I was like, “I’ll just Uber, it’s fine. That’s what Uber’s for.” And I was like, well, I’m gonna get the comfort. It’s a little few more dollars, but I wanna be comfortable. A little few more. And I get in the back of this Uber and homeboy had been smoking cigarettes. A Venn diagram. Uber driver and smoker. More likely than usual. And you know what, it wasn’t… I get just like an immediate headache with some cigarette smoke. Like I am just like, it’s the worst for me. It triggers a headache 110% of the time. And he, you know, just because you get outta your car and you’re smoking a cigarette doesn’t mean that when you get back in your car, I can’t smell it. There’s something about, it’s on you, it’s on your person. It’s still coming outta your person somehow, man. And so here I am, like rolling the window down. I rolled the window down and I felt bad about rolling the window down. How cold of a day was that? Pretty cold. It was pretty chilly. Okay, all right, your rating went down. I’m rolling the window down and I feel like I’m sending him a message that… I’d rather not be like, “Hey, something around here stinks and I think it’s you so I’m rolling the window down.” I didn’t like that, but I- What was the look on your face? And did he have sunglasses on and could you see him looking in the rear mirror? I wasn’t looking at him. I was kind of looking down. I rolled the window down. I kind of stuck my nose out. I needed to do it. I needed to like golden retriever. You was headed out? A little bit. The funny thing is, I did it… The place where I did it is right before we get on the interstate here in Burbank. And when I rolled the window down- Oh no, you… Oh no, you did it next to the plant with the natural gas that comes outta it. Yeah. There is a place in Burbank- I call it the fart bridge. When you crossed the bridge- It’s a fart bridge. You crossed the bridge that goes over the five on Burbank Boulevard. It’s the fart bridge. It stinks. In Burbank. You will, if you haven’t crossed it before, every single time you will assume that someone, maybe you, farted. And that’s what my Uber driver thought I did because I rolled the window down. So it’s like I roll the window down, he smells a stink. Oh, it’s like this dude farted in the back of my car. Oh, shit, man. And so, like, here I am thinking about how bad he stinks. He’s thinking about how bad I stink. But you did at least roll the window down. And then I’m driving and we get- You’re driving? Oh, this gets interesting. I’m riding and we get… He doesn’t know how to drive in the traffic, and I’m like, man, if I was driving, I’d be way over here. I’d be cutting people off. He’s taking twice as long to get home and I’m getting… And I’m smelling this stuff. He didn’t carpool lane. He didn’t carpool lane and he’s not aggressive. And I mean, it was good that he wasn’t talking to me. I did like that. There were no words exchanged, except just the insinuation of what the window rolling down meant. By the time we get close to the house, I look up and here we are going the wrong direction. He has taken a wrong turn. And at this point I decide I’m gonna… I’m gonna let him have it in the review. I’ve never done this, but here I am, angry and my head hurts. And it’s really, I’m mad at Rhett and I need to take it out on somebody. And I get home and I tell Christie about it. I’m like, “I’m thinking about writing a review.” She was like, “Well that’s what it’s for. Write it.” And the way that they… Once you start writing, like, I put two stars. No, I put one star. Ooh! And then I was like, you know what? I feel this isn’t that bad. I’m gonna put two stars. And then I’m gonna like… Well it’s not like he’s reviewing me. I gotta stick to my guns. Well, first of all, I don’t know if… Well, A, he is reviewing you, but B, I don’t know- There’s no way he can see my review before I see his. There’s no way the system is based on him looking at what he gave you. Reviews have to be closed to both sides before they’re both… It has to be blind. Double blind reviews. That’s how Airbnb works. Airbnb, you don’t see the review about you, which you do see, easily, on Airbnb, once you submit the review about the other person. Or maybe you only see aggregate. I dunno. Airbnb, you see the actual review. Oh, I know for that, yeah. I stuck with my guns. I put one star and then it’s like, okay, well why? And you have to choose from the things. And was it like- That’s pretty harsh, bro. Was it like… And there were certain things in there and one of them was wrong turn. I was like, well, wrong turn. It was a big wrong turn. Mm. It’s one of those when you go the wrong way on the freeway and then you’re like- Well this is a two star wrong turn. Like you took two stars off of the wrong turn. How did we get from five to one? That’s what I’m trying to figure out. Emotionally, honestly. So I clicked wrong turn, and then it was like, okay, anything else? And I didn’t see anything else. But then it said other. And I’m like, yeah, well the cigarette smell is something people should know about. So I put other. And then it brought up a whole other thing. And one of them was smell. Smell, yeah. And so I clicked smell and I felt bad about that. Were there smell options? There wasn’t smell options. It was just smell. And then I wrote- ‘Cause it could be a good smell. I wrote cigarette smell, cigarette smoke. That’s what I wrote in the writing. Okay, all right. And I did not put a tip. I usually tip, even if it’s three days later and I’m opening the app a month later, I’m like, oh yeah, I forgot to tip. And then I’ll tip. I do always tip. You really let this guy have it. And it’s your fault. And then I submitted it and I felt good about it. And now, oh man, this road goes both ways. So I’m gonna show you how to do this. Do you think I was wrong, first of all? Do you think I was too harsh? I mean, three strikes you’re out. That would’ve been… Well, maybe I was a little harsh. I don’t know, one star feels pretty harsh. Pretty harsh. You know, I think he’ll be okay. He’ll probably be okay. You’re not gonna derail his career because of this. The thing is is that, here’s what I want- He had a billboard on top of his car. It was a LED screen turned sideways, like he was a pizza delivery guy. But the LED billboard on his car was promoting Uber. Oh. And I’m like, oh, I got me a professional Uber. I got like, woo, this guy has really got it going on. Yeah, so he’ll be fine. So my expectations were higher. But here’s the other thing- It’s like he was related to ’em. I have to assume… I pretty much have only ever given five stars, right? Even if it’s like… I mean, I kind of do the same thing with, you know, servers in restaurants. It’s like- Give them the benefit of the doubt. Unless you do something like… I’m like, 20% is my baseline, right? And then if you do, if like… You said you were a fan, I’d definitely go up significantly. If you did a great job, I’ll go up significantly. But like, it’s only… You have to have done something rude that was your fault as a server. You offended me or something. Which I don’t know if it’s ever happened, right? When it comes to the Uber thing, I have given some marks off if it’s like… If the cigarette smell was overwhelming, you know what I’m saying? But I don’t think I went to one star. I was just like, all right, I’m gonna give a little feedback here, I want you to kinda think about that. But you also got the wrong turn. So it was the double whammy. But I think people probably are like, most of the time it’s five stars. But then if I’m upset, one star. So it probably goes… For drivers there’s probably a lot of fives and ones. So maybe it’s fine. But let’s look at our own, okay? Okay. And correct me if I’m wrong, if y’all know about this, I think that if you cancel a ride, then they can give you a rating and that they’ll give you a bad rating. And I gotta say there’s been multiple times where there’s been a canceled ride because of where I live and how… It’d be like, this dude’s not moving, I don’t know if it’s service… So you’re getting nervous too. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Well, I’ve already looked at mine. Oh, so you’re explaining. Okay, so open up your Uber app. And do they use this as a way to decide if they’re gonna take your request? Probably. I don’t know. Call in if you’re an Uber driver. Tell us how you feel about what Link did. And also answer any of the questions that we have. The number is 1-888… EARPOD1. EARPOD1. So go to the lower right hand corner, click on account. Account. Okay. Now go to settings. The bottom part of the screen there. Settings, they’ve hidden it under settings. Okay. Then click on privacy. Privacy, really? And then it says your data and privacy at Uber and then there is this little icon and it says, “Would you like to see a summary of how you use Uber? And then click on see summary. I don’t wanna look at mine yet. Okay. Explore your data, how to use this tool. Commitment to privacy to us is important. So then scroll down to ratings. Well first of all, thank you for being with us for… How many days have you been with Uber? 3,729. 3,728. Oh, I signed up the day before you. You’re an early adopter. Everything we do in life is like, it’s kind of all in pace. One day of each other. I’ve taken 179 trips. I’ve taken 224, which I don’t think is a lot of trips. How many trips have y’all taken? If y’all are in this. 509. 509. Mine is around eight… 190 something. Okay. Okay. About the same as me. Jamie, you’ve taken a lot more. Yeah. A lot of people take Lyft more. Yeah, I do, I use Lyft. Or it depends on if there’s a deal. I scroll back and forth. I got kicked outta Lyft and I don’t know why. Oh no! I wanna look at your data first. So show me what you got. So if you’re following along, you’re gonna scroll down to ratings and then you’re gonna click on view my ratings. They buried this. And this takes a while the first time… To generate this, it like thought a lot. Now I can just go back and see it. Okay, well I’m gonna go ahead and click mine just so it’s going. ‘Cause it’s gonna ask you another question and ask you if you’re sure or something and then it starts. Okay. All right, so my aggregate rating is 4.73. That’s good. Which if I saw a 4.73 on a driver, I’d be like, okay, but I’d like to see 4.95. I’d like to see 4.9 something. Well, you’re above four, it’s only outta five, right? I’m just saying, I just… I don’t know how… I think that might be a little bit low. No. 160… We’re gonna compare all four. We got all four of us here. So a 165 five stars. 13 four stars. Now those are… I’m most curious about those 13 four stars. Like, what did I do? What do you do as a rider? I don’t do anything. I’m so quiet. Maybe that’s what it is. Maybe I don’t talk, maybe I don’t answer the questions. I think you’re making- I do answer some. I think you’re making ’em wait. You have to walk down that long driveway. Yeah. I think you’re late. Six three stars. Six two stars. And two one star. All right, the one star is just you… They were about to be at your place and you- I’ve done that. You cut ’em off. Yeah. You sent ’em packing. Well, there’s been a couple of times from my home where I’ve had to call an Uber and a Lyft at the same time. I’m like, whoever gets here first gets the ride because it can be so crazy at certain times. And now once I get the other ride, I cancel the other one. But I shouldn’t do that. But Stevie told me this, and it’s true, things have changed, man. Five years ago it would be like, “Finding your Uber. Your Uber is five minutes away.” And five minutes later they would be at your house. Now it says, “We are looking for your driver.” It waits. And then it says nine minutes. And a lot of people in my neighborhood, a lot of drivers in my neighborhood who live in my neighborhood, they just got… Here’s my theory, maybe I’m wrong. They’re parked at their house. They have their app on. Oh, they’re on the toilet. They’re watching the game. They’re doing whatever they wanna do and then they see, oh, somebody needs a ride. Okay, yes. And then they do something else like eat a sandwich. I don’t know what happens. But they don’t get to my house in nine minutes. Try to find matching socks. And I’m just saying it’s changed a little bit. So my approach to the game has changed. But anyway, so I’m at a 4.73. That’s still pretty good, dude. So you do a grab bag approach. So you’ll make them race to your door. An Uber and a Lyft. I may have done that three times in my life. I’m just saying that it’s… Under certain circumstances I’ve had to do it. “Please note, ratings are optional. Not everyone will give you a rating.” Rider ratings. 4.76. Oh, dang, Link! I’m six tenths… You’re three one hundredths higher. You’re three one hundredths higher. Three one hundredths higher, yeah, that’s what it is. 137 five star. Four four star. Four three star. Zero two stars. And six one star. Whoa, whoa, okay. This is the crazy thing. Why do I have so many four stars? You got six one stars? How did this happen? I’m heavy on the one star. Six one star and then four four and four three. I’ve got quite a spread. Six two stars. You got zero two stars. What’s happening here? I will say that when I called the Uber from here, when you left me, you remember that, when you forgot I existed and how much you cared about me. And I had to find my way home, so I called an Uber. Well, I found the Uber and then it was like, I opened my screen to see how far the Uber was away. And at first it was like, you know, seven minutes away. And then when it was four minutes, I opened up the thing and I was like, oh, four minutes. And my thumb clicked something. And the next thing I knew they were… I had no ride. And I think I clicked cancel. Hmm. And I think I’ve done that a lot. I think I’ve done that at least six times apparently. Like just be an old man pushing… Like instinctively pushing the biggest button for no reason. So I’ve canceled on accident, but I feel good about this. Wow, now I can now I can really move forward wreaking some havoc. 4.76. Jenna, you gotta go next because Jamie, you’ve got the biggest data pool. Yeah. My score is 4.86. Dang! She’s the winner. I am a delight. But I will say, I have four one stars. Whoa. Four one stars. Two two stars. One three star. Three four stars. And 188 five stars. That’s nice. Dang, okay, okay. You know the thing I’m realizing. Lincoln has my Uber account. Oh, you know what- Lincoln’s been… Oh. This is Lincoln. This isn’t even me. Why doesn’t he have his own Uber account? I don’t know. Because… I don’t know, we just never… I just said if you ever need an Uber when you’re at college, you know, use the Uber. But he should have his own account. He probably has his own now. ‘Cause you would see it happening a lot. I do see it. You would see the rides. I get emails and I see his rides and stuff. And then I tip his driver because it’s my account. He’s making me tip his… He’s got it made, don’t he? And he’s getting me these one star reviews. Or he’s probably the four and three star. I will say I book rides for you all via my account from time to time. Yeah, I probably shouldn’t… I can’t blame the one stars on you. I’m pretty sure that’s on me at some point. I don’t know, it might be me. Drunk Jenna is a delight. Oh damn. But maybe a mess. Oh gosh, you made a mess. I’ve never made a… Never in an Uber. But I’ve certainly been with my friends and called Ubers places and like been in the Uber with them and been like, “Oh my God, please, please, please.” I’m gonna get such a bad score. Get us outta here. Definitely been there. Yeah, when you start to factor in like, vomiting in somebody’s car, and that can only… The worst that can be is a one star. I feel a little bad about giving my boy a one star, taking me home just for a wrong turn and some cigarette smell. I mean, he didn’t vomit on me. Yeah. Yeah, you can look through your past rides and I basically have given everybody five stars. But then like every like 10th ride it says canceled, ’cause it’s like I’ve… Yeah, I shot myself in the foot here. Okay, Jamie. Okay, so I do have a way bigger pool here, but my overall is 4.89. Nice. She’s the winner. But, so, I have like five stars, 417 rides. I have ten four stars, six three stars, three two stars and four one stars. And I’m- Dang, you got only four one stars with that big of a pool. Yeah, but I’m still like in… I have this story from back, like, when Uber barely started and I had an Uber driver ask me, “Why is your Uber rating so low?” And I was like, “What do you mean, sir?” I was like, “I am delightful.” You knew from the beginning. And no, he was just like, “Yeah, you have like a three point something.” So I have definitely brought this up, but I was like, trying to think- Are you like asking… You’re like hawking the good reviews? You’re like, “Gimme five stars,” when you’re getting outta the car? You were trying to like boost your score. No, I was just like, when that happened, I was like, “What do you mean?” He’s like, “Yeah, you seem cool to me.” And I was like, “I feel like that is accurate.” So what did you change? Because you’re like, you’re getting outta the car and you’re like, “Let’s just recap the fun we had together.” You know? I feel like we had some five star fun. It might be the questionnaire that I have printed out in my purse, but… Right, that’ll do it every time. You give ’em a little candy. I agree though, on the… I’m here, I’m like, why did I only get… The three stars are the ones, why am I just at a mid… What did I do to be mid? Not even the four, the three stars are the ones that I’m like I don’t understand. I mean, being quiet is not something to get dinged for. Shouldn’t be. Yeah, I’m trying to think of the things that I’ve done. I mean, I’ve got the lowest score here. I feel like I gotta make a change. Being terse could like… If you’re not friendly in your conversation, I guess a driver could ding you for that. I’m just trying to think… Like, maybe you smell. Not you, I mean us collectively. I smell sometimes. One could smell, you know. Usually not when I’m out. I smell at home. If you’re talking on your phone really loudly, like… I don’t do that. But I think that’s worthy of a… That’s just in- I definitely do not endear myself to the driver. No, I don’t do that. If my wife is present, she will. We’ll know the life story of whoever is driving. And maybe they would get a low score for that. She would get a low score, if they didn’t wanna talk. Usually not. I don’t think so. I think they seem to be participating pretty strongly. I think if you just give ’em a little friendly hello and a friendly goodbye and a thank you, and nothing in between. I think that’s a good bookend. I think that’s a good practice. Now if the Uber starts asking me stuff… Like, I don’t say… Sometimes I’ll put no conversation, ’cause they… When you call the Uber, they ask for your preferences. I love that. Yeah, I never give the preference. I’m gonna start putting in no- Just don’t talk. I’m gonna put the no conversation, ’cause that way it’s like, hey, this is just, this is just how we’re riding today. Maybe that will increase your rating on average ’cause there’s no expectations set. I mean, in the absence of doing that, I have been sparked up with an Uber. And what I meant by that is sparking conversation. I realize it sounded like I was smoking the cigarettes. I sparked up with some of ’em. Sparking conversation. Like, they would try to get me talking and be like, “What do you do for a living?” You know, that’s the time I boldfaced lied to my Uber. You said corporate video. I said I’m… Yeah. It’s not a lie, it’s true. I work in corporate video. You do. ‘Cause Google is a corporation and… Well, so is Mythical. Okay, well I feel a little bit bad here. We’re doing good guys. I mean, those sound… The 4.8, 4.9 that could… If I see a driver that has my rating, like a 4.73, I’m like, this guy has made some mistakes. Honestly, that’s what I think. You rarely see a driver less than 4.6. So now I kinda feel like I’m kind of at the bottom of the barrel at this point. What do you do when you see that? You don’t cancel because then that’s gonna give you a one star. It just raises the hair on my back a little bit. You know, I’m like, okay, I gotta be real clear here. I’m gonna blame this on my neighborhood. That’s what I’m blaming it on. They get lost coming up to my house, they lose service. I have to give them directions to get back to the highway. Yeah, but that’s not their fault. There’s things like that that happen. And I think they’re taking it out on me. When you’re calling an Uber… I mean, can you choose between different people? I’m seeing if you can see their rating on the app before you like, choose which one you want. I don’t think you can. I don’t think you can. I mean that just wouldn’t be… I think the rating is mostly for… Like, if I’m the Uber people. I’m clicking on a car… To be like once your rating gets below a certain amount, you can’t drive anymore. You go on a probation or something. Okay, so yeah, so it’s a little disconnected the rating. So I got a little something to work on. You know what, we’ll check again next year. See if I can beat you. It’s like our credit scores. Okay. I like how you make the Uber and the Lyft race to your house. I do that with napping. I’ve started doing this new type of napping where like I’ll drink a coffee and then I’ll be laying there and I’ll see if I can beat the coffee to nap time because if the coffee kicks in, I’ll wake up. So I gotta fall asleep before the coffee makes me wake up. And it’s kind of like a… I’ve pictured it as like a race in my head. It’s like my napping metabolism being attacked by the coffee I just drank. It sounds like such a relaxing thought exercise to make one fall asleep. There’s a race going on in my head. I’m about to dream. I’ve gotta hurry up and nap before I wake up. I think you do have like 30 minutes or so. And then when you do wake up, it helps you wake up from the nap, like, more invigorated if you take a caffeine nap, caffeine power nap. But I like the race of it all. It’s the thrill for me. I think I gotta stop the racing technique though. I wanna be clear, I’ve only done it a few times and my understanding is that the driver still gets paid a certain amount. They don’t get paid for the drive, but they get paid for the cancellation if they did any driving. If you care about your rating then you gotta work on it. But you got some leeway. I wanna share with you something that I finally get to share. I think we should save it. I really wanna hear my- No. I wanna see my vision board. We’re gonna see both. I just don’t think we have time for your- I’m not pushing this for time. I don’t think have time. If we’re pushing anything it’s the vision board. Come on. So I was watching something with- This, by the way, shouldn’t take a lot of time. Jessie. Exactly. I was watching something with Jessie and I don’t even know how I came upon this. We were watching YouTube videos together while working out. And there was something where there was a… This guy who was like the world record holder for speed reading. And I don’t know if you have seen these videos, like, there’s some videos that are like… Of someone speed reading? No. No, like, there’s a TikTok video going around of this guy who’s like taking a book and like flipping through it in front of these judges or something. And it’s obviously fake. There’s no person that could do that. But this is a guy who is like definitive, like, Guinness World Records recognized and like, they’re saying like, oh, what is he doing? And it was just… I wasn’t thinking, oh, I’m gonna watch this so I can learn how to speed read. I was like, oh, this is interesting so I’m gonna keep watching it. And then by the end of it, the way that the guy explained it, I was like, okay, well maybe I’ll try this. So basically what he did is he said… You watched the world’s best do something. You were like, “I can do that.” No, because of the way he talked about it. Okay. Because I’ve always just thought… I’ve always thought A, it’s bullshit. I was like, these people aren’t actually reading. That’s what I thought. I thought they were faking it, right? I didn’t think they were faking it. Or they’re like not really getting the information. Yeah. And then what he said was… He was like, “Well, what I’m doing is I figured out that typically when you read something…” If you’re normal like me, and I think I’m actually a below average speed reader, is my theory. You kind of read something and it’s almost like there’s a voice in your head that’s saying the words out loud, more or less. You’re like reading it and there’s like… Narrator. So it’s kind of going at the speed of speech and he’s like, that slows you down so much. And what you’ll find is if you just take your finger and you just kind of run it across the line and you convince your brain to stop having to insist that you say it inside your brain and you just realize that you’re just taking in the information, you’ll get to a place where you are taking in the information conceptually. And if you stopped and thought about it, you would realize that you actually did get the information. And so I was like, well, let me try that. And so, this is the thing that happens to me. I think I’m such a slow reader because I’m a very easily distracted reader and I read a lot. But what happens is, if I get down into my bed and I start reading, I like make it literally sometimes like a page and a half and then I’m like falling asleep. That’s good. Right? And so I’m like, I can’t, I’m not getting anything done. And also sometimes I’ll start reading and I realize that… It’s like when you find yourself driving and you’re like, I think I’ve just driven for five minutes and don’t know- Yeah. I don’t remember any of that. Yeah, you have to go back. You do the same thing with… I do the same thing with reading quite a bit. And so what I found is I’m trying this new technique, not because I’m trying to get through a bunch of things faster, but because I’m so slow because I’m so distracted that I found that by doing this technique and I’m not actually doing my finger every time. Now I’m just kind of looking at it. It makes me focus more on reading. And that’s the reason I ended up getting more… I’m less likely to fall asleep while reading because I’m trying to do this technique. And you’re not gonna be tested on it except for now. Because, you know, I’m like, I’m gonna get a book. I’m like looking around our office for a book. We have a bunch of decorative books. I was like, I’m gonna get one of those. And then I realized I have got a fun book. We were given Dr. Emily Morris’s “Smart Sex.” Oh. How to boost your sex IQ and own your pleasure. So from like Sextember last year she came on the show. Yep. Then she sent us the book. Was that year before last? Anyway, I think this is out now, but we have an uncorrected proof. So there might… Oh, I’ll spot all of them. All the incorrections. So I just think you need to speed read. But can I set the bar for you real quick? And I wanna see how well you get it. Because I’m not gonna be… You’re not gonna hand me the book and gimme four seconds and I give it back to you. I have to look at all of the words. I’m just not gonna read the words out loud in my mind. So I’m gonna go faster than normal than for me. Well, it’s just a page and a half and it’s in a box. So like, it’s actually less. So I would like for you to speed read the section on penis popping. Okay. Okay, I’m not gonna look yet. It’s on the right side. Do you wanna read it normal and time yourself? I’ve already read it. Okay. I just don’t know… I don’t think this is gonna be impressive. I’m gonna go fast. I’m gonna go as fast as I can. It’s a page and a half, so how much time do you need? I don’t know. I’ve never timed myself. You gotta go quick, man. I’m probably gonna give you 15 seconds. Can you not say distracting things while I’m doing it? I’m not gonna… Yeah, this is not for comedy. Can you make a low humming noise, just like a drone noise? Just to let people know that the podcast is still on. Like, you want me to make a gray noise? Yeah, make white… Well, you’re a white boy, make white noise. But don’t change tones. Could it be more of a hiss? Like a… Yeah, just see it… It’s a little wet, I wanna make it drier. Yeah, make a drier noise. And here we go. Alright, that’s 15 seconds. You’re done. Turn. No, no, I’m reading the whole thing. I could have read the whole thing just normal, I think. No, I couldn’t have. I think that’s over twice as fast. Now you’re really hurting me ’cause you’re talking. Just get what you got from the first page. Okay, all right. So I was doing great until the second half when you started interrupting me and talking. Okay. But I want you to understand, I just read five paragraphs in I don’t know how long that was, but that was way faster than I typically would read. And I was just looking at the words and then letting them register in my brain. I can safely say that I would’ve read it at 25% speed of what you did. Okay. I am a slow reader. Except when it’s horny stuff, I guess. I don’t know what I’d be at. So can I give you a summary or are you gonna ask me questions? No, gimme a summary of penis popping. Okay. Well, basically the idea behind this is that sex is messy, right? So there are lots of things that can happen during sex. Like vagina farts is one of the things that can happen during sex. So, you know, the expectation that you’re gonna have every hair in place and everything is gonna be perfect when you’re having sex is an unrealistic expectation. The word vagina farts is in here. And one of the things- Not queef. And one of the things that can happen is penis popping, which is when the penis slips out of the hole that it’s in, the vagina in this case, I think in this particular example, during sex. Now at this point, I’m simultaneously relieved and disappointed. Because when I first picked this, I was like, oh my gosh, this is gonna be about my worst nightmare. Breaking the penis. Like when it’s like… ‘Cause there’s different chambers in a wiener. You don’t wanna break your penis. And then if one of those pops like a balloon, that’s disturbing. Can I go on and tell you the rest of it? But you are correct in saying that that is not what penis popping is. So right off the bat, you haven’t… You’re not making this up. ‘Cause my first test was, is he just gonna make up what he thinks penis popping is. When you said penis popping, I thought you were talking about when it breaks. Yeah. It makes a popping noise. You circumvented the misdirect. Continue. And basically this is all a function of the angle of entry. Right? It’s something that happens. It’s a combination of the angle of entry and something else. I can’t remember. The position, I think. And so you can experiment with, if this is something that happens on a regular basis, you can experiment with cowgirl or reverse cowgirl. That can change the positions. And then some people actually just want to move to something simpler, like missionary, which could be a good… So basically you need to experiment. You don’t need to feel ashamed. These are things that happen. But you need to find, you know… You need to find your own mojo and your own solution. It’s also a good reason to what? Call your mom. What? I haven’t called my mom in a while. I’m waiting for my penis to pop out. I don’t understand kind of the question. Potential penis slippage is also a good reason to… Not call your mom. Penis slippage is also a good reason to… I don’t know. I missed that. Slow things down. Oh, slow things down. Slow things down, Rhett. Let me go backwards here. That was in the second half. That’s while you were talking, I was listening to you and reading at the same time. What type of penises will become more comic than tragic if you embrace awkward moments? Popped penises. No. Disobedient penises. Okay. Okay. And so you’re not really getting good with the details. Was that in the last paragraph on that page? That was in the intro paragraph. Okay, yeah. I mean, you do, you end up missing some stuff and also, I mean, I just don’t remember everything. If it happens to you, who cares? That’s a question. Nobody. Exactly. You got that right. Your mom, your mom. You can make light of it, you can laugh together, or you can do what? Try a new position. Or just what? Go with the flow. Add some… Music. Lube. And get that… Penis back in there. Yeah, that was it. Get that penis back in there. You got that part. Keep in mind that a slow… Insertion. Grind. Grind. Swivel or what motion is likely to cause more popping than moving up and down? Lateral thrusting. Back and forth motion. I don’t even know who’s right anymore. Okay, you’ve done it. Okay, so let me tell you what I did. I applied this… It’s pretty good. Over the holidays, I was reading a book, I think it’s called like “The Tiger” or something, and it’s a… I don’t know, I was told by somebody on TikTok, I’m on like book talk, you know, and like listening to people talk about things and somebody who was talking about this being like a page turner. And I was like, okay. And I got into it and it was a book about these dudes in the, like, eastern most part of Russia, which is like a really desolate jungle region where there’s like the Siberian tiger, the Asiatic tiger. Okay. And they’re like basically tracking a tiger that had killed some people. And it’s based on a true story. But it’s a historical… It’s a retelling of the story with some imagined… I don’t know what you call that genre where you’re telling a story that actually happened, but it’s a little fictionalized. It’s not historical fiction ’cause it’s more… it’s a documentary of it, but… Embellished tale of reality. This dude would go into deep, deep like history and information about the region and about all this stuff. And I was kind of like, this is hard, man, this is hard to get through. But I just feel like I’m so bad. And I started the book in end of 2023 and it was like coming into 2024. I was like I wanna finish this book. I don’t wanna just stop another book. And this technique came along. Oh, penis popping. And yeah, penis popped my way right through that book and then called my mom and told her I had done it. No, actually, I sped read. Again, it’s not crazy. I don’t know if somebody would be like, that dude’s reading the hell outta that book. I think they would just be like, that dude’s reading normally. Whereas before it would be like that dude’s reading a page and a half and falling asleep. And you’re like skipping areas where you don’t feel like you need all the details. No, I did not do that. Well, you’re speed skipping. You’re skimming. But I was like, I… It makes you like engage with it and then you like have to… And then sometimes you hit a place and you’re like, this is something that I have to slow down and take in every single word and say it out loud in my head and maybe go back. But then… The slow grind, they call it. And I got through the book. Like, it had taken me three weeks on and off to get like 40% of the way through the book. And then it took me a week to finish. And I was like, this could be… This could be revolutionary. And you enjoyed the book more. Yeah, and I like remember a lot about the way that the book… That second 60%… You didn’t do any more research besides that YouTube- One video. It was just, instead of reading it out loud to myself in my mind, I just was like, I’m gonna make my eyes move across the words faster than I think my brain can keep up with. And then you start thinking, oh, I actually just got all that. It’s in there. Yeah. And I just speed read that doggy style is the position that is most likely to cause a penile fracture, which is what you thought penis popping was. Yeah. That’s just the next page. But, I mean, I recommend it. I mean, don’t just go on my word, watch a video about it. Is that your recommendation? Yeah, let’s make it my recommendation, ’cause I’ll save my other recommendation for next time, but… Cut for time. It’s not bullshit. It’s not bullshit. Like, it actually does work. I never thought it was. Well, some of the videos are bullshit. Somebody picking up a book and going, and just being done with it… That’s bullshit, man. Well, yeah. And there’s people who do that. Okay. We have as much time as we need to… For me to experience my vision board that Jenna has worked on. I don’t know how hard she’s worked on it. Maybe I’ll be able to tell when I look at it. Maybe. You gonna give it a scale of one to five stars? Yeah, yeah. Give me an Uber rating. Okay. All right, here we go. I’m gonna look at it first. Oh wow. Holy moly. Look at this. They got pills on it. Yeah, it does have pills. Oh. Oh my gosh, Jenna. I didn’t see the letters. I thought you gave him some pills. Look at this. Here’s your vision for 2024. Take these pills. Jenna, I’m gonna take this to therapy and take full credit for it. Okay. Hey therapist, I’ve been doing some work on my own and I just wanted to share it with you. This might be frameable. Look at this. It’s got a three dimensional vibe to it. There’s leaves! So what does this say? Gron… Ground. Ground. Ground. Ground. Yep, and here’s the snowboarder. And here’s the moon. Sun. There’s a map with some islands, some angular shapes. Avant-garde bicycles. Riding bicycles. Oh, is this a bicycle? Mm-hmm. Well look at that. Mountain biking, snowboarding. What does ground mean? Like, staying grounded? Staying grounded. Okay, yeah, yeah, yeah. There’s a heart here. Replenish. Stay hydrated maybe. Yep. Napping with dogs. Yeah. There’s literally a man… Napping with dogs. Or maybe he… He could be dead. No, he’s napping with dogs. There’s multiple dogs. Yeah. The dogs will stick around after you die though. Cats’ll eat you. You have a man napping with a dog, and then you have a scuba diver. You have some adventure here. You got an underwater thing. Connect. Connecting with nature. Connecting with my son perhaps. Yeah. When I go scuba diving. I like connection. It’s a good filter, I like applying to things. It’s like, is this enhancing my connection with my fellow man? Here is an actual… Is that poison ivy? No. And then, okay. Male sorted. Okay, yeah, ’cause my number one thing was sexual activity. Yeah. What else have I missed here? I put a hummingbird in there, and on all the leaves, that’s Christie. Oh, there’s a hummingbird. Is that a fortune cookie? The houseplants. It’s kinda like a little fortune cookie down there, yeah. What does that say? You never talked about music, so I added a little thing about music. You’re right. You know what, Christie and I went on a date after that conversation about like ranking our favorite stuff from the last episode. And we had a great conversation about that. Yay. It’s a good date conversation. And then I realized, I was like, you know, I didn’t put anything about music on there. That’s okay, I thought of that Because I was like listening to music and then playing music. Two different things, both on my list. Without music and love, life is a journey through a desert. Ooh. Harsh. Wow. Yeah. I hope this didn’t take as long as it looks like it took, because- How long do you think it took? It looks like a two hour affair here. Yeah, that’s about right. Yeah. But, you had fun doing it, right? I did have fun. It was a fun like Sunday. The only thing I did on company time was use the printer. I don’t have a printer at home. Jenna, this is… This is me. This is the experiential pleasure me. Yeah. Look at that. That is beautiful. I’m not going to ask you to make me one. Okay. Thank you. I’m gonna ask you not to make him one. I’ve got the big- We need to be different. I’ve got the pen and ink thing, you know? Yeah, right. I’ve got it, I don’t… You know, I don’t want… You don’t need to spend any more company time on this. On doing a vision board for me. And I’m not gonna burn this. Okay. Unless my therapist tells me that I should. And I’ll talk to you about it beforehand. Maybe at the end of the year you burn it. You take a picture of it first. Yeah, it’s the end of the year, you’ve completed your vision and then you can release it into the fire. Yeah. And a phoenix come back from the ashes. I don’t know. I’ll be in an Uber when I’m burning. Oh okay, yeah yeah yeah. That’ll help the rating. Help the rating. Oh yeah, what is my star rating? This is too good. I appreciate it. I’m gonna stare at it whenever I need the perspective of pleasure. Thank you for that. Yeah. I’ll be damned. Maybe just… No, it just cracked. Okay. And it’s on fire. Oh no. All the pills fell off. The vision is being destroyed. Very few words, easy to speed read. All right, we’ve been through a lot today. We’re that much closer to each other. Yeah. Listen, hey, leave us… Leave us those voicemails that we asked for. You know? Dare us to respond with your assertions. We wanna hear from you. 1-888. EARPOD1. EARPOD1. And of course #EarBiscuits and leave us a review or rating if you haven’t. It’s helpful, especially if it’s, you know, good like our Uber scores. Five stars. Hi Rhett and Link. I just finished listening to the episode where Link talks about his New Zealand trip and I just wanted to say, as a mail carrier, I can verify that it is weird to be driving on the other side of the car, but you’ll get used to it if you keep doing it. Love you guys.