hey guys want to give you a little something extra this week you know stevie has her podcast best friend’s back all right that she’s doing with her high school best friend nagin and we thought that you as an ear biscuit listener would be especially into not just this podcast but this particular episode the third episode of the podcast where stevie kind of gets into the details of what it was like to be closeted in high school and what it was like for nagin to be her best friend and to not know and she goes into the details of how she kind of came to gross with that yeah so we’re going to we’re going to play that episode for you at least a part of it so you can just conveniently start listening but i’m really excited about best friend’s back all right because it’s in a lot of ways it’s like a female perspective of kind of like what ear biscuits is for us you know two friends reconnecting and then building a stronger connection and i think that’s the operable question for them is like having been friends over 15 years ago can they rekindle that connection can they be the friends that they used to be and with something like this particular episode it gets really interesting i think there’s a lot of important things that are shared from stevie’s experience that i certainly learned a lot and there’s bits and pieces of it that i knew from talking to stevie but the way that she was able to put that all together and share her experience of coming to grips with her own sexuality coming out of the closet to herself i gained a lot of insight there and i do think it’s very um i think it’s an important conversation so we wanted to share it with you yeah and so in a lot of ways because what has come to define ear biscuits is this friendship and this connection that the two of us have and also at times being vulnerable about our past and and what’s going on in our lives we thought that uh the theme of this episode and the story that stevie shares is really on brand for ear biscuits and for the kinds of conversations that you’ve enjoyed in the past so please enjoy this um piece of best friend’s back all right [Music] welcome to best friends back all right the show where two high school best friends try the best friend thing again i’m making homemade fat and i’m stevie when levine oh [ ] i forgot i was continuing today we’re going to be talking about being closeted wow what a seamless intro into uh into being closeted i think i nailed it traumatic part of your adolescent experience yeah i’m no longer closeted as a bad intro uh segwayer so that’s uh that’s what i’m coming out as today um hey how you doing how you doing i’m good i i um i’m excited to talk about what it was like back then because i’m in a good place now so it’s allowed me it’s gonna allow me the freedom to kind of dig in and and uh and evaluate um some of the [ ] that was going on back then so i’m i’m excited i always like talking about um kind of the the queer experience and i hope that there are people listening who can either glean a little something from what we’re going to talk about today or roll their eyes repeatedly and perhaps propel something via rolled-eyed energy and in in which case that would also be a productive you can get stuff let’s get there yeah they could like churn eye ice cream which honestly is a disgusting thing to say because i immediately am envisioning like i sleep frozen creamy oh yeah yeah speaking of disgusting i’m on my period oh ah yes that’s also what we needed to work into this episode i’m on my period and i’m sorry it’s been a rough day it’s been a rough couple of days literally like the energy is dripping out oh my god okay yes yes yes yes it was a disgusting it has been like a difficult difficult couple of days but something happened that made me go back to high school and it was such a vivid memory okay so was it it was so i was rifling through i was rifling through my my bathroom cabinet looking for a tampon okay looking for anything that would absorb what was happening to me and i couldn’t find a tampon and somehow somehow i found this like old vintage pad i do not know i have not purchased a pad in oh my god you found a stranger pad i found a stranger pad and i had a moment i had a moment i had a really fun moment in that pain i had i had a moment where i flashed back to high school when i also wore pads yeah and but they were your own at that time but they were my own they were my own they were hot pink and wait yeah like the the the wrapping was hot pink it was a nice normal nice normal white and i flashed back to that feeling of walking to the pencil sharpener when you were on the on your period or having to walk up to the front of the room and being so afraid right that you were leaking that somebody could god forbid see the pad outline through oh yeah yeah yeah oh my we were wearing some tight pants back then too if the pads had been at our ankles i feel like we would have been okay because there’s a lot of ankle space going around in the pants yep yeah but that’s actually not what the vagina is yeah turns out turns out yeah i would wait i would wait until a specific moment in class when people were doing work and it was less likely that they would um be looking up that’s when i would walk to the front to sharpen a pencil or ask to go to the bathroom because it was just so i was so self-conscious wait can we go back to the stranger pad did you use the stranger pad and can was it was it hot pink what did it no it was white it was thick it was like a thick super like a medical vibe it wasn’t a medical vibe but it was like a diaper without the band you know exactly what i’m talking about yeah like a waistline yeah i would have used it i would have used it if i couldn’t find the tampon in the end oh you found a tampon because you were leaving me hanging for that that whole story i mean i was like i hope she’s plugged up over there because who knows i eventually found one in the in the again in the apartment bathroom they had like sanitary uh sanitary napkins you should have taken the video out and then [Music] no barge in on zach and like who was here who was here who’s pat is this were you sitting with someone else who left this pound in the back we found out we found a really really strange sports bra in our laundry once and i did that whole thing turns out we had friends that were visiting and it was theirs but i was like which ho ho were you sleeping with from the gym tell me now zack tell me now from the gym i i totally know where you’re coming from because speaking of sports bra that reminds me of get like when you have to get your first bra which is more of a middle school situation that’s like a precursor to the period embarrassment because i was actively embarrassed about having to wear a bra oh any anything were you not padded bra or just uh no just just a bra no i i was excited okay see i think this is the maybe the like queer woman experience versus a straight woman experience maybe because to me having to get my first bra was like really embarrassing which is so weird i can’t explain why because it’s not like i agree like society has made periods something that you don’t talk about and therefore it’s very easy to say [Laughter] but like bras isn’t an embarrassing thing and i i’ve definitely well where were you buying the bra from because if it was victoria’s secret i totally get why that would be embarrassing because it’s so sexual this is like a target situation please for the like mosquito nips no no no no there’s no well actually i guess there’s some mosquito and it brought up victoria’s secret probably uh but no i think it was you know it’s a good segue into the topic of conversation that we’re having today because i think it’s a good portion of this is also i think about uh gender identity and like not having the proper terminology apparently even now to talk about feeling like different or feeling less feminine and more masculine and i’m only using those terms because i i i don’t have any other terms that come immediately to me and i think the bra discussion and the period discussion falls into that category of like the older you get as a female these things happen and therefore our confirmation that you are a woman and i think that as a kid you know one of the first things i remember in regards to kind of my perception of my gender or or sexuality was like when i was you know could first talk like when i was a toddler preschooler there was a period of time where i asked my parents to call me scott i was like call me scott because i bet scots were pretty successful back then i don’t know what it was but like i was embarrassed by being a girl like i was embarrassed by being a little girl and i think that at that age it’s not like anyone’s dating anyone or anyone has a perception of that so like it wasn’t like well i’m playing with tonka trucks and i think i want to [ ] a woman uh it was more like i’m playing with tonka trucks and it is embarrassing when you acknowledge the fact that i’m a girl yeah so it would be better for me if you just went ahead and went with scott uh for for the time being interesting so did your parents call you scott when you asked them to no no no and i think that uh i mean we’ll certainly get to the role that my parents played um by the way they listened to the first episode of the podcast and i could sense that they weren’t gonna keep that from me but then they couldn’t so then they had to say that they listened to it because they were like adding some little hints that i was like i think i talked about that on the first episode of the podcast and then i put it together that oh they’re trying to like hint at me that they listened to the first episode and and they did and they enjoyed it although my dad you know remember the first time he didn’t like that impression he was definitely he was fine with the impression he wanted to argue the percentage point that he offered of the content of mine that he’s not watch i recall specifically him saying i don’t watch 99 of the content you make and he recalls saying like 95 he would like to argue that the four percentage points that i left out leaves a lot of room for content that he watches and uh therefore that like yeah one percent to five percent was unfair to him so i would like to come back and correct that he doesn’t watch 95 of my content not 99 okay okay mr levine you win yet again yet again so no they did not call me scott but in terms of the tonka truck of it all like i i remember playing with what was quote the boys toys like i was always ken when we played barbie i was always the dad when we played house i always wanted to be that traditionally like male role okay interesting whereas i always always wanted to be the mom i did not want to be the baby i always wanted to not want to be the baby cummerbund who wants to be the baby when that’s what you have to do i wanted to wear the pad in the family you remember that american girl doll book you know the book the puberty book oh no oh my god really you don’t remember it was fully illustrated and it was like a puberty book for girls and it was by it was under the um the american girl uh you know brand and there was a whole centerfold of illustrations of in yeah i say this because it was uh step-by-step guides of inserting a tampon with illustrations yes wow yeah that’s that’s so smart i mean i never i was never exposed to that i also had an older sister i do think having an older sibling who has gone through similar milestones is a huge advantage yeah in some ways right because you see them go through it and go through the awkwardness of it and then you can course correct was she helpful to you in those moments like were you like oh you’re a mentor to me like i just started my period what do i do or like or no not i mean now she is she’s an ob gyn so i asked her all of those things you’re like she was not a trained physician no i wasn’t allowed to wear tampons oh so the tampon thing was like that it was i mean culturally like you i don’t know i’m saying it’s cultural but i don’t know any other iranian girl that easily got to insert a tampon without there being some like slight hesitation like tell me more i feel like it’s like a woman’s thing i mean it’s a like penetration uh aspect of it i think so i think so and it’s like the way they grew up and they mean my mother and women of her generation in iran i don’t think i should look this up if tampons even existed in iran but it was like the way they did it and i think for a lot of immigrants when they come to the united states there’s this like holding on to the way things were done um like a strong holding on and a tampon is probably like we’re not gonna let that straw break this camel’s back this is like too womanly to do something like that so you think it was that and not there’s no like medical question or like oh this works perfectly well so you don’t need that type of thing or or i think that i think she’s like this is what i do when this works for me yeah so you should just do the same thing but i remember being curious about a tampon but being scared of it too because of the penetration and like how do you what if it gets lost all of the you know there’s yeah we could have a whole conversation about about the things we put in our body to to be women on our body to be well oh yeah the long list of things i’ve lost in my vagina i mean it could we could go an hour and and honestly maybe a little show and tell you know and you can american doll grown-up version yeah you can tell me what things are because lord knows they’ve been up there for so long it’s probably hard to decipher what’s up there now but it sounds like you had these feelings of not fitting in at an early age well i don’t know if i would classify it as not fitting in because i think that as a kid you’re you actually are very accepting of other people so like when i wanted to be ken great we need a ken and we’re not playing with boys so like people hate you okay yeah it’s like there was resistance perfect no and and um you know i think that it it’s something that extended through middle school and i and i remember i remember saying to myself i’m gonna fit in in high school like because you know i went to such a small school and i kind of was the class clown of the 12 people in my grade and you know it was you know boys in middle school wear soccer shirts when it’s really freezing outside and it makes no sense that’s how i was like it wasn’t like um i didn’t fit in because it’s hard like not to fit into a group of 12 people that you’ve grown up with so it was just like that was my niche i was the i was the class clown that wore the soccer shorts and was a tomboy and like it all worked out fine but taking that with me into high school seemed like an impossibility like why why why did you think you had to change something about yourself did you know something about grimsley i think it was an insecurity that if i you know if you don’t fit in then people you’re going to isolate yourself like you want to have friends you want to be accepted and so you do things in order to fit in to be accepted by other people yeah but i think luckily for us this like preppy thing was in at the time and it’s very easy you know to to wear a polo or an oxford and not feel like tomboyish necessarily but you know the boys are also wearing oxfords and polos so it’s like very easy in that way to kind of you know skirt the line a little bit totally and that’s what was being i mean i remember you were always wearing like american eagle i feel like american eagle was your favorite brand because my parents couldn’t afford like abercrombie or hollister like you know so american eagle was like you know the the semi-affordable version of the of the other two brands thank god you didn’t do aeropostale yeah because my goodness no but you were always you had a uniform and it was always like a colored something with distressed tight-ish jeans yeah which was uniform being sold exactly that most people were were wearing so that was on the mannequin yeah but like you know to a certain extent like that was like a classic look like a polo is like a pretty classic look so you’re not like i mean i think it was trendy at the time but the point was i fit in you know i i didn’t you weren’t like oh look at that [ ] lesbian and so sorry at this point coming into high school did you know you were gay i think i always knew i was different i think i did know i think there’s certain things that happened during high school and moments that i had that were confirming but i think it was really difficult to admit to myself i think part of it has to do with the conservative southern setting that we were in not just being a closeted gay kid but like you know we talked about how the the the majority of people were baptist methodist christian and i remember i lived across the street from neighbor girl so it must have been right before freshman year and our parents were like oh you girls are going to grimsley together you live across the street like you should hang out or whatever and i remember going over to her house and she was hanging out with another girl and they were on their little the staircase and the foyer in this traditional house and i walked in and i was obviously nervous because i wasn’t friends with these girls but i was like you know wanted to hang out and the first thing this girl says to me is are you scared of going to hell and i was like what and she was like are you scared of going to hell because you don’t believe in jesus christ oh my gosh so she was mad that you were jewish she wasn’t even mad she she she was genuinely asking me like there was no there was no hate behind her question she was taught that if you don’t believe in jesus you go to hell and that jewish people don’t believe in jesus so she was just genuinely curious like how does it feel knowing that you’re gonna go to hell and i’d never like i knew that obviously i’m i’m jewish i’m not christian that makes me different but i’d never been confronted like to my face in that particular way and i think that that’s like a good setting of the scene for the general vibe you know around us at the time was like it was it was weird that i was jewish it wasn’t weird to us it wasn’t weird to like our our friend group but it was weird to you know the majority of of people around us and so like that conversation like you know i honestly to my credit was like i’m gonna explain to her why i i i don’t believe in hell and i’m not going to hell and like actually i don’t think that that’s true and we like had like a a a civil exchange because again she wasn’t coming from a place of of hatred or anything but like i think imagine being jewish but then being closeted and gay which honestly was so much worse to to to be in in the eyes of like this kind of southern christian conservative lens is like you don’t believe in jesus and also you’re gay like man like i mean looking back i should probably toss that in like you know i actually i’m extra scared because i’m also gay let’s hang out [Laughter] school’s gonna be fun ladies wow have you guys seen that american girl book so yeah so i think that um you know i was very aware that that i was different not just just because i i was i was gay and i think that at grimsley specifically i can’t i didn’t know anyone who was gay did you know anyone who was gay i can’t recall but i looked in our yearbook and i saw that we had and i remembered this but we had a gay straight alliance yeah and i remember there being one but there were a number of one game no there were a number of people in the club which to me means like this group i don’t know it could have been 20 to 30 people really yeah well see i don’t i don’t remember that at all i don’t remember i don’t know open up open up 2006 yearbook oh i thought you meant like open up your mind open up your right now no so seeing that made me realize okay there was a group of people who i mean it’s a gay straight alliance but there were people that were either out or outwardly accepting yeah of gay culture so that’s really cool especially in an environment like the one that we were in because also those years were kind of crazy so in the in like the world or in worlds yeah yeah 2002 to 2006 i mean you brought up our president bush with the pretzel story but like he in 2004 he tried to pass an amendment that would forbid same-sex marriage yeah in the constitution in the constitution it’s because whoever baked those pretzels was good he got mad yeah he got mad yeah so i’m i’m curious i’m really curious how the what was going on in the greater world outside of grimsley outside of greensboro affected the way you perceived yourself or your your comfort with coming out well and my my parents were were bush supporters like that’s the other weird thing is that my parents are are conservative republicans which is weird as a jewish kid but like yeah they they they have always been so like that was also a big thing is it it wasn’t just like the world i was surrounded with was conservative my my parents are concerned their parents like you know [Music] can i ask you um we talked a lot about like the christian context and how that was limiting what about the jewish context like what did you go what were what what was the temple or the synagogue saying yeah point about homosexuality if anything in general unless we’re talking like orthodox or like hasidic jews judaism is very accepting of of same-sex relationship so it was never a part of any teachings or rhetoric or anything like that because the other thing is like you know normally jewish people tend to be very liberal so the people that i grew up with were very liberal people yeah and i i do remember one of my teachers at school was gay middle school at middle school but but but it wasn’t a topic of conversation and i don’t have any specific memory it’s not like my parents were were homophobic at all it’s not like that was a discussion in my household which i know for a lot of kids and a lot of people listening right now it is like they have actively homophobic parents that push this rhetoric that you know if my if my kid ever comes out like they’re getting booed out of the house or you know and so that that was not the case for me it was not a blatant statement for my parents and my parents or not i mean obviously because i’m very close with my parents now but i i would say they’re they’re which i know there’s this is problematic to say i would say they’re socially liberal but they’re politically and which doesn’t make any sense but they’re accepting of of me and um they’re not people that hate other people period so there was never a discussion in my house that like being gay is wrong it just wasn’t discussed you know and i know so i think that by not discussing it there was this giant gray area where if you were a closeted kid your mind doesn’t go to there’s a gray area let me go to the side where they love me and everything’s fine you go to the side where no they’re conservative republicans and they’re gonna hate me and disown me and i and i’ve disappointed them and you know we both talked a little bit about the pressure that we had to succeed academically and and be good kids in general so it’s like you know does a good kid come out not in their world in my world back at that time like that’s a that’s a strike like man what’s the point in me you know having great grades and being a good person if i’m gonna be gay wow but it’s also that like at the time there wasn’t like a lot of representation either like you can’t it’s not like a kid in high school is like well ellen exists you know it’s not like well if ellen can do it to that end i want to see how like if if any of these things stir up some memories for you because the the 2002 to 2006 period of pop culture representation is super white super white and it has come a long way queer representation and yeah culture but let me let me give you a few little fun fun facts of those okay okay 2002 we have rosie o’donnell coming out as a lesbian 2003 we have the ellen degeneres show that starts and then the much beloved queer eye for the straight guy so we have two lesbians so far and a group of gay men and then the l word comes out in 2004. did you watch that do you remember watching this and feeling anything so i have multiple multiple stories but the one that i would come later to find out basically my dad is like a computer nerd so he set up our tv screen in the den at the time he like connected a computer to it because smart tvs weren’t a thing so he con connected the computer to the tv and you could pull up the internet and and search things and like i was like chromecast before chrome yeah it was just essentially like this is the is just using the tv as a monitor but at the time it was like oh this is awesome so we used to pull up youtube and just search for trailers and and different things but you know that the search history stays on there when you like type into the little browser thing and one time i remember i was looking for something and i saw in the search history it said like the l word something and i was like oh my god like that’s weird i don’t know what that’s about and i i know what that word is but i’m not searching for that word i would not and then years later i think it came up in conversation at some point and because my parents knew and they had like referenced that they had also stumbled upon that but it wasn’t me it wasn’t your sister it was my sister and okay so the other thing is you know going to the video store it used to be my favorite thing to do and i was obsessed with seeing everything that would come out and i remember walking down the aisles and i would go into the new release section and there would be some days where i’d seen every single movie in the new release section and there’d be one new movie that i hadn’t seen like i was just obsessed with like all things content of course um but i remember specifically seeing the covers of the dvds for the l word and intentionally being like don’t look at that wow i see it exists and also like there are covers especially in the early seasons where they when they were like really hanging on like this is a group of attractive lesbians don’t you want to watch them their promotional materials were like they’re all naked and you of course you can see any bits but it was like hey how about we just you know bring all these attractive women together take all their clothes off and then pile them onto each other for the dvd cover so you can’t even like pretend to rent it because you thought about it was like it was so female yeah yeah it’s about love uh but yeah so the the l word was the l word and ellen that was the representation that i had at the time so it’s like are you an older comedian with a daily talk show is that what you want to be when you grow up or do you want to be a hot lesbian piled on other hot lesbians i feel like you have found a happy medium between the two you should write a letter to these women for instance buying your cart in life that is really funny that is really freaking funny i feel like that would be that’s a great pinnacle it’s your it’s your it’s your tagline yeah rosie o’donnell meets the entire l word cast oh you’re going with the rosie over the ellen i’ll take that you know oh sorry i’ll take it i really was thinking rosie this whole time oh okay great i think maybe that was that’s better maybe i mean or worse i don’t know i mean it depends how do you treat your employees yeah exactly shut up shut up um i remember so broke back mountain also came out when we were in high school i saw that i remember that okay i remember that being a what i would imagine would be a negative experience for a closeted person because people were really mean in high school about that movie it was i don’t recall that i remember because heath ledger and jake gyllenhaal had a sex scene and i remember there were so many derogatory jokes about the two of them and how it was disgusting and hmm i would imagine hearing that would be just like you know not exactly the cause of of coming out i saw that movie three times in the theater it was a cinematic masterpiece it’s funny because at grimsley i did not know anyone who was gay and in fact the only time i remember encountering anything gay was two women on the women’s basketball team when i was walking to class i remember seeing them like making out with each other and being like what the hell and also these are like gigantor women you know so it wasn’t like oh it was like it was like there that’s something that i don’t see every day and uh avoid it like the l word dvd but one of my good friends in high school and someone that i that i hung out with for the majority of my senior year is um art school boy yeah did he even go to our school he did not go to our school so he went to kind of the arts high school which i really wanted to go to and over at the arts high school things were a lot different at grimsley um and so we knew each other through uh the majority of like the theater stuff i did was actually through the city and not necessarily through grimsley so we knew each other through theater through the city and we became good friends and then i remember specifically when he came out to me um which is so weird because of course he was gay because of course that makes sense but it still was like oh it still was a moment of like oh i’m i’m having to readjust how i think about you somehow even though that doesn’t affect anything but once i became close friends with him i think it actually helped me in a lot of ways because i also was able to view things through the lens of having a gay guy friend as my as one of my good friends and so we saw broke back mountain together a few times and so i don’t think i was conscious of of that kind of gay slur part of of the world which i’m sure was happening at grimsley and in our broader friend group but i think because i was friends with him that’s the lens i was viewing everything through and we weren’t surrounded at that moment by those things so i i have to ask you said he came out to you in high school right yeah did that open any kind of window of opportunity for you that you wanted to take to also come out no and i think i think partially because i was not ready myself like i i still was in this like i think that i’m gay but like i there there’s like a lot of coming out to myself that i needed to do and when he came out to me i still had a process that he was coming out to me which is absolutely ridiculous because of course so i i just don’t think i was in this the state to go oh now that you’ve done that it’s my turn but also like he was like my alternative friend like he didn’t go to grimsley he was like my theater bud he was like you know a gateway into another group of of people but he wasn’t like my everyday reality like i didn’t go to school with him um so yeah so and i think that when it comes to our specific friend group it certainly is not at all like i felt like you would judge me but also it was very easy to stay closeted because as we touched on none of our close friends were dating and they weren’t having sex and they we didn’t really talk about that and so it wasn’t like oh we’re all talking about dating and having sex with with boys and stevie’s not i know you know a studious iranian girl who doesn’t have time or permission to date is the perfect communion for a closeted lesbian okay my plan worked the whole time yeah so it wasn’t like that part wasn’t weird like i didn’t feel weird because i wasn’t dating boys for the majority of high school i felt like oh that’s what you weren’t doing no one was no lucinda melvin wasn’t really yeah like it wasn’t a thing and in fact like it felt a little bit you know we would judge the girls who were like there was like some [ ] shaming that was going on back then doing what were we saying i think it was just that i think it was like the use of that word that if you had any kind of sexual experience you were a [ ] and that’s just the lens that we viewed things through and it’s so indicative of of the people we were surrounded with in the in the in the conservative vibe we were surrounded with but like yeah i remember it was easy for us not to do those things because there was an error of doing those things is wrong and it wasn’t just that we were getting it from our parents it was just that was the surrounding temperature was like the whole not having sex until you’re married like the the view of what dating was yes but i also think we were freaking scared of all of that stuff oh i know i was right because i mean people were people were dating in high school like plenty of people were doing some hanky-panky yeah right some version of it and we were just not about that because it also was like you know a boyfriend is a gateway drug to drinking and bad grades but i to your point i i see how it was easy to to avoid kind of the whole dating conversation because it just wasn’t it wasn’t a priority for any of us yeah no matter if we were gay or straight did you think i was gay no when you came out to me i remember when you came out to me i i don’t remember i think it was 2008 it must have been summer break because i remember being barefoot walking down the driveway and you called me that is so kind of me i really did it formally i did it the right way i was like you know what i’m not a text not a ai i really appreciate that yeah yeah you’re like i have some serious no and i i don’t remember the exact words you used but i remember you came out to me and you were at that point one of a few friends who had come out to me um in college and so it wasn’t my first time having that conversation but i remember it being i mean you must have been so nervous yeah i mean cuz come on this idea that like no one else i don’t have to call people to say hey i just want you to know that i’m a heterosexual like this idea that you have to call to put your sexuality on it yeah on a on a plate for someone you’re not even sexually attracted to yeah is so freaking ridiculous as if it changes like anything else right i’m telling you so you know i’m a lesbian you can you can wear different clothes as a result i mean like what the hell i’m so sorry that you had to do that and that people have to do that but i remember it being a positive conversation and getting off the phone smiling and then i think i went in and my parents were like oh who was that i was like ah it’s stephanie she’s a lesbian like she she she told me that she’s a lesbian okay so we’re gonna break back in at this point and encourage you to go over and follow subscribe whatever it’s called wherever you listen to your podcast and finish this uh particular episode yeah so uh the rest of the episode i i love it when i’m listening to a podcast and someone says i don’t think i’ve ever said these things out loud i applaud stevie for for being willing to share those aspects of her experience and also nagin for being such a good listener and for being supportive and i think that’s a great example too so as you continue to listen to the episode stevie shares a story of uh rejection oh yeah so we’ll see we’ll see and there’s some clarity in that but she put herself out there and i applaud her for it and i applaud nagin for how she was a great listener and being supportive even though she didn’t know what was going on uh at the time you know yes so thank you for listening to this uh portion of best friend’s back alright and like link said go over there subscribe follow finish the episode and we hope that you will continue enjoying best friends back all right all right all right all right