(upbeat music) – Hello there, good to see you again, you look great. – Goop, it’s not just my nickname in high school, it’s also a lifestyle brand by Gwyneth Paltrow. Hi Gwyneth, we know you watch this show, so we’ll go ahead and address you directly. – Gwyneth, it’s time for… – [Both] The Goop Scoop. – Now Gwyneth, since you support us by watching the show, we wanna support you by purchasing a product from your Goop shop, just to show you how much we care. And the first thing that caught my eye was the Marabou Pleasure Puff Ring. This thing is $673. – Hold on. – I don’t have to hold on. – Rhett, are you serious? – She is serious, Gwyneth is serious. Now this is what it says on the site. It is “topped with delicate marabou feathers, “this sterling-silver statement ring works overtime “as a playful tickler in the bedroom. “Try slipping it on and grazing your hand over your, “or your partner’s, skin,” I guess you can do it on yourself. (laughing) – You can’t tickle yourself, can you? – ‘For a gentle jolt of pleasure.” – So okay, hold on. My mind is blown. Just because you’re adding a fluffy top to it, you can charge $700, Gwyneth? – Well, 673. Gwyneth, I just gotta be honest with you, this is a little excessive so we’ve gone ahead and just created one of our own, actually two. Link, I just took a troll doll– – Exactly, that’s all you have to do. – Chopped his hair off. Now it says it’s especially good on the middle finger, so Link, let’s tickle each other. (audience laughing) You can use it on yourself, but that’s no fun. (laughing) I feel the need to back away, how does it feel? You know what, just forget that it’s me doing it, just pretend it’s Christy, “Hey Link, you like it in the ear?” – Don’t, don’t, don’t impersonate my wife. (audience laughing) But do it some more, it does feel like it’s worth $700. I mean it is ticklish, but I can’t imagine how the $700 version of this would be that much better. Another product that really caught my attention was the Goop Medicine Bag. On the site, it says this pouch contains “magically charged stones.” $85 for these stones, Gwyneth. – That’s an expensive bag of rocks, guys. – Okay, there you go. These rocks cure the anxiety you feel when you find out your turnips were not locally sourced. (audience laughing) It doesn’t say that on your site, Gwyneth, but I’m suggesting that you should add that copy to it. – That’s a good selling point. – Here’s the thing. I got Lando a rock tumbler. You throw some rocks in, you tumble ’em around for a week or so, and you pull ’em out and you got some smooth rocks, just like that. And I went into the back parking lot and I got the starter kit right here. Just a bunch of rocks, man. They cure all types of stuff like needing rocks. (audience laughing) – That’s real nice, Link. – There’s a big white and black one, there’s a brown and gray one. – What do you say this ran you? $85? – How much is my time worth? I don’t know, I was out there for about five minutes. – This is like a dried-up piece of Enzo’s poop. (audience laughing) – I wasn’t being discriminating. – Please, take those with you. – Yeah, I’ll sell them to you for $85. – Honestly, Gwynnie, $85 is a little steep for a bag of rocks, but we did find something at a reasonable price. Psychic Vampire spray. Now this thing is only $28, it is a spray-able elixir, it “uses a combination of gem healing and “deeply aromatic therapeutic oils, “reported to banish bad vibes “and shield you from the people who may be causing them.” – Now, according to the website, a psychic vampire is an emotionally-draining life force slash aura sucker, who is just generally making you feel like you need to take a nap after talking to them, and it turns out that we have one right here. Chase, come on out. (audience laughing) Hello Chase. – Hello guys, how are you? What do you think of my outfit? – It’s fine. – Oh, just fine? I dressed up for this episode. I feel like you guys never pay attention to what I’m wearing, you never care, I try all the time, you guys are my employers, and you’re my friends, you’re my best friends. And you’re my idols, and you always make me talk in that stupid Southern California accent, but this is me, this is me and you guys don’t seem to care. – Okay, okay, okay, I get it. (squirting) It worked, very good! – Well it took care of Chase. – It propelled him immediately. He was a psychic and an actual vampire, like two for one. – I think it’s safe to say that worked, that is the nicest thing you’ve done, Gwyneth, since dying ten minutes into Contagion. (audience laughing) Click through to the next video to watch us do some interesting ASMR with Arielle Vandenberg. – Watch out, we got killer Black Friday deals just around the corner. This Friday through Monday at mythical.store, get mythical merch for murderously low prices.