No! Okay, you can hold my probe. ( music playing ) I have something that I’m going to tell you and once I tell you you may find yourself questioning everything even more than you already do. Link, you might wanna take your glasses off because I’m about to help you see clearly for the first time. Get ready for some truth Lasik. I thought you were gonna hit me. I’m gonna hit you with some facts! Okay, here we go. Cut into my eyeballs. Redheads are aliens. Redheads– – Are aliens. – Aliens. Let me introduce you to Lyssa Royal Holt. – Link: Is that her? – Rhett: That’s her. – Link: Okay. – Rhett: It’s spelled L-Y-S-S-A, but it said Lisa. – Okay. – Already interesting. And what, her background– She is an internationally recognized author and lecturer. She’s known for her in-depth explorations of the nature of extraterrestrial consciousness and how it impacts human evolution. In other words, this woman is a trusted source for truth. Link: And she’s got a great smile. And she not only loves to stand in front of purple flowered trees, she believes, Link, that redheads are aliens. The theory is rather simple, actually. I’ve got this little chart. Now if she were a redhead that might bring more credence to this. What does she know? – Exhibit A, my pointer’s– – Ooh, look at this. A little longer than I need it to be. You’ve made a– a whole thing here, huh? Yep, just so– Just so I don’t lose ya. – Okay, that’s nice. – Okay, as you can see the top– It’s a plaquered, a presentation. My main thesis is at the top. Redheads are aliens. You can also see it visually. Redheads are aliens. I can do it either way. Redheads are aliens or redheads are aliens. Okay, you’re– Great work so far. The first human redheads were– From a crafting standpoint. The first human redheads were what? Vikings. Where did they get their red hair from? – Aliens. – The redheaded alien giants of course. – Oh! Hold on. – One race of giants was known– This is– This is a video game image of a giant. Hey, man, listen. I couldn’t get a good photo. I couldn’t get a photo that would please you. – But the alien looks great. – Yeah. One race of giants was known as the red-haired Lyrans. There they are. And as Lyssa eloquently wrote once… Not Earth means aliens! Now, I know you’re following me. Actually, I’m– If I’m following you what you’ve told me is that these giant aliens… – Uh-huh. – made regular giants… – Uh-huh. – who became Vikings… – Yeah, well– – who are redheads. Here’s what happened, though. Giants came from them and then the giants and the Vikings interacted. “Interacted.” Do you know what I mean by interacted? Yes! You know what? Let me see that stick for a second. Let me see the stick. – Okay, that’s more– – No more interaction. That’s more realistic. – They were probed, Link. – Okay. They were probed. Okay, now, how do we know– – By this? – No. I’m getting to that. I’m glad you asked. The last image on here. They Lyrans are known as the Lyrans because they come from the Lyra Constellation. Let’s get a better look at this constellation. Right there. Take a look on that monitor, Link. Now, let’s zoom in a little bit on the Lyra Constellation. Link: Just to the left of Vega. Rhett: Do you see it? Do you see it? Do I see it? – Yes, that is– – You have connected some dots. I see that you’ve connected dots, yes. Rhett: Yes, that is clearly the face of Academy Award winner and alien offspring Julianne Moore with her alien freckles. She should be given an Academy Award for pretending she’s not an alien! Bravo, Julianne! Bravo! Hello? – Link, would you like a glass of water? – I’m here, man. Would you like a glass of water? I– Why? To wash down all those red pills. I mean, it does look kinda like Julianne Moore. – Like the jawline. – Rhett: That’s right. And I’m not done. That’s just the beginning of this theory. Oh, great. I was– I wasn’t hoping you were done. Keep listening. Redheads are biologically different from all other nonalien humans. They’re born with a MC1R gene mutation. This gene mutation makes them burn in the sun. When do aliens probe people? What time of day, Link? What time of day? – Nighttime? – At night, that’s right. When you hear a redneck talk about being probed with an alien they don’t say, “This mornin’.” They say, “Last night!” Every freaking time, because the aliens can’t stand the sun. – Hello? – I– I’m right here. Redheads also have pheometa– – What? – Pheomelanin. Which causes the reddish pigment on their hair. If you rearrange the letters of pheomelanin you know what you get? Alien phenom. Hello? It’s– You’re so loud. A report written on the Website, Elevated Today, on of my favorite sources, – states that redheads are– – Why’d you look over there? Just ’cause I’m just making sure everybody’s listening. Their entire– I don’t know why I’m holding– – Continuing to hold this, but– – Can I– No! Okay, you can hold my probe. “Redheads are entirely capable of withstanding more stinging and pressure pain than the average blonde or brunette.” You know what else requires withstanding stinging and pressure pain? – Being probed. – Okay, okay. Hello? NASA always uses the excuse that UFO sightings are just weather balloons. Even after the famous Roswell flying saucer crash, they claimed it was just a what? A weather balloon. Do you know who else has balloons? Clowns? Wrong. Clowns. And what color hair do clowns have, Link? – Red? – Red! That’s right! And what do clowns like? Children? Being probed. Hello? Ed Sheeran, he’s a redhead. This “GQ” article from February– – You’ve broken your prober. – No, that comes in and out. – This– – No, it’s easy. I’ve taken it out many times. This “GQ” article from February 2017 says, “How Ed Sheeran became the biggest male pop star on the planet.” The planet. If you were talking about the Earth, wouldn’t you just say the Earth? – Who? Me? – Hello? – And if that doesn’t seal the deal for you, – No. if you’re still a doubter, sheeple– They’re– Rhett, they’re not here anymore. – In his– – It’s just you and me now. In his song, “I’m in love with the shape of you,” he never specifies if he means this… – Uh-huh. – Which is a woman. – I see that, yes. – Or this… Okay, Rhett. I– You’re– You’re saying– Probe drop. You’re telling me that this photo of the alien from the movie “Alien” is the silhouette – that Sheeran sees. – Ed Sheeran’s thinking about when he– when he is in the mood for probing. I don’t– I don’t have anything. – Case closed. – You’ve lost your mind. – Laptop closed. – Speaking of madness, you’ve heard of March Madness, but what about Munch Madness? Make sure to tune in this coming Monday, March 26th, where we will be kicking off our Munch Madness. A week of taste test where we determine the greatest snack of all time. Thanks for liking, commenting, and subscribing. No redheads involved or your theories. You know what time it is. My name is Rene and I’m an archeologist working at in the Mojave Desert. That is a petroglyph and it’s time to spin the Wheel of Mythicality. Click the bottom link to watch this episode from the beginning. And click the top link to watch us match the Mythical crew member to their frequently used emojis in Good Mythical More. And to find out where the Wheel of Mythicality is going to land. Link: The world is full of mysteries like, “Where did your favorite mug go?” Oh, that’s right, you haven’t bought it yet. Buy your new favorite mug, this Boiled For Safety mug, at mythical.store.