I have pinpointed a pervasive people problem at parties let’s talk about that I’m Joan up from German Wisconsin look mister good morning good mythical morning today’s episode is brought to you by catalyst comm the guys with the goods goods like the countertop vending machine hey Linc and I have a drink absolutely let me vend one for you right here perfect for your mancave or your tailgate it actually is powered by your car or a wall outlet thanks Jason you can you can remove this vending machine while I consume this drink thanks for joining us today you are special we like to think we’re so and this is a special gathering oh my goodness what happens when you get it out of a vending machine Linc it didn’t overflow it’s it’s it was just the perfect amount of fit not good burp cuz I can do it on command I can do it with help let’s not do that I won’t you’ve got a problem with pervasive things happening at parties what you like the alliteration not really I knew you would I’m I’m typically at parties with you because we’re such party animals I think we’re definitely known as being party animals well I said parties because it had a P but it’s really parties in any social gatherings I’ve noticed this has happened to me personally from multiple angles in many different social gatherings over the years and this year especially it’s been happening multiple times and it started happening to my wife and so I was like we got to address this amongst the mythical beasts okay so you’re gonna address a problem that happens at parties slash social gatherings we’re gonna discuss it you’re gonna relate to it we’re going to unpack it in such a way as to as to what learn something with some packet organize a party people problem okay so is that the goal to unpack it or you know what do we have a goal here I just like to know I have a solution and I would like to hear their solutions okay okay okay here’s the issue here’s the situation you are at a social gathering party let’s say there are two people talking okay mm-hmm now you’re not dancing it’s not one of those parties not at the club this is just two people talking which this is how I dance when I’m pervasively at parties yes so a pervasive Lee pump when I’m party Peter Piper picked a pervasive people party and then you’re like I need to be into this Congress I need to be a part of this conversation either I’m to talk to some okay sometimes it’s like okay I actually need to talk to rob this guy here so I’m going to go up to these two guys and they’re already having a conversation mm-hmm I need to talk to rob so I’m gonna go up there and I’m just gonna you know start waiting for the conversation in and I feel awkward then me and Rob start talking and Dan who I don’t know it gets quiet and leaves or said I’ve been that guy I’ve also been in a conversation and had a person approach me and the person I was talking to and I didn’t know whether they wanted to talk to me or the person I was talking to because I didn’t know them or if they just wanted to enter the conversation like they’re just getting to know people and so then they enter the conversation they naturally derail the conversation that you were having or they they derail it and make it about them and another person and then you leave I’ve been the guy that was awkwardly standing there and do you have like a situation like when this happened you have a for instance no I don’t because then people who watch the show may like figure out that they were a part of it and I and I don’t want it because it’s not it’s a problem a pervasive problem that happens with people at parties and other social situations but it isn’t no one’s that no one’s a bad guy this is just because humans haven’t developed we developed a lot with our social interactions but there are some places that we just haven’t developed a proper system it happened to my wife the other day where there was a person that she hadn’t seen in a long time she’s talking to this other woman that’s a friend of hers who doesn’t know the woman that came up and then oh she she doesn’t know or didn’t see she no she was just getting to know this woman but the woman she’s talking to didn’t know the woman who came up the woman comes up starts talking to her this woman stands there awkwardly and then walks away after a second it’s this I don’t know what that we need to come up with a name for what this situation is it’s like mid-conversation triumphant you need to have the word try in it like try as you may if this is gonna be awkward that’s too long for a tight trifecta what will come up with a name later but the situation is is that I feel like dry conversation the try conversation how to have a try conversation yeah but it doesn’t just start with three people it starts with two and then the third person comes into the situation to buy to try phenomenon by to try conversational phenomenon problem to buy to try conversation unbowed problem okay that’s shorter okay because you can be you’ve you’ve experienced this no doubt yeah yeah I’ve been I’ve been talking to somebody and then all of a sudden I see a worker what there’s someone in like I’m like talking to this guy like I’m looking at you I’m talking to you and all of a sudden somebody behind you that you don’t see is like lurking and they’re like are they looking at me are they looking at you are they signaling to me that I need to shut up so that that the lurker can talk to the person that I’m talking with and I’m sitting here having a conversation why why are you contacting your eyes with my eyes just state lurk away man no no no because I’ve been the lurker I have been the lurker I’ve been the victim of the lurker and I have been the looker because who says that you can’t enter a conversation once a conversation has begun well I actually maybe okay I’ll be fair here the lurker may be trying to be polite and not just being like hey I don’t care what you two were talking about I’m here now and we’re gonna talk about what I’m talk about or or yes hey can you guys start over it looks like you guys are talking about something cool just can you start over because I was I was gonna lurk but instead I just thought I would blast in and yeah and that’s also a problem so so so the lurker may just be a polite dude no one is the bad guy here that’s it my point is no one is wrong the person who gets offended and walks away they’re not wrong the person who lets the person start the other conversation is not wrong the person who starts the conversation is not wrong either I’ll be the system it’s not about right or wrong before we get to some system I want to point out that I think the worst position to be in is to be the blind man or blind woman there’s the lurker and there’s the blind man the person that is talking but doesn’t see that someone is lurking to either commandeer the conversation to talk to you or to talk to the other person so then you know the blind person is like deep in conversation like I found myself you know talking to somebody you say blind person you mean the lurker is behind them right here and I’m really into something but what I don’t notice is all of a sudden the person I’m talking to I’m loose and I contacted like they don’t like my story what’s what’s what’s wrong in those cases there’s a lurker no back there the lurker is wrong the lurker always has to come in from 90 degrees okay you can’t come in from behind somebody you can’t blog these two people are having a conversation you have to enter their peripheral vision at the same angle so you interrupt them together probably like do something like this like no tricks in your hair now you’re getting into my system this is how first of all if you’re a lurker and you want to join if you want to come your truck the Tri and you want to do in a bi conversation you need to enter from the side you need to find the angle I don’t care how you do it do not come in from behind somebody that is so inappropriate you’re creating a blind man yeah yeah yeah blind spot you’re ruining this copper your blind spot you come in at 90 degrees you come in perpendicular and this is you need a system okay this is the system simple elegant unique okay if you want to join if you just need to speak to one person and you’re like I need to speak to link but I don’t want to stop a conversation that’s happening you come you come in you stand approximately five feet away and you point to the guy you want to talk to point yeah you stand back you stand back and you just kind of look at both the men just put a finger on the person point in their direction it’s like so when they look over there they acknowledge you and once you have been acknowledged you go back to this right here and just stand once you’ve been acknowledged you’d remove the point it so as I’m a prolonged point is pervasively awkward yes oh that’s a P word actually a bit parties word lots of people and then you then you come in if you need to talk to the guy on that side you point with your you point with the other eye and if you want to answer the conversation you come in like this guns-a-blazing you point it both of them in it and if they give you the knob just walk on it up another half start over tell me no tell me what’s wrong with that now you may say well that’s awkward you have to point but listen nobody’s feelings get hurt everybody understands the system everybody abides by the system and everybody lives better lives well I think if you did some sort of a chicken kind of a mating dance kind of thing it would it would be at least be more entertaining look at that guy over there it gives those people just about up in a make a come on come over here that’s hilarious oh you wanted to be in this column anybody can do okay yeah you’re here now it’s great you know in so I mean I love entering a conversation like this anyway you know yeah because it’s like obviously I’m here I’m here to talk about something I entered conversations guns a-blazing and some but then if you want to talk to the one person then it’s it’s kind of like cutting in it’s exactly what it’s like a dance and your may I cut in I think it would be elegant to actually you know may I cut in say that no because that’s like dancing yeah but I mean that seems like you’re coming on to the person that you want to speak with me I mix it a little too I want to retract something I think you should do the double point from a distance and then when you’re acknowledged the other dudes should wave you in and then you come in you so you re engage with the double pump double what does that come not a double the double coming like this the double give the double point on the way in is optional but the double point from about five feet away hey I want to talk to both you guys I want you to enter the conversation point that’s not up so you’re not shaking right they’re not like I’m here to party it’s just like just normal point I’m here to talk right you should you should keep the phone now cuz that looks like a gun you should just you just point I want to talk to you I’m gonna talk to you I wanna join wait do you have any suggestions in how to solve the the by to try convo problem I think this is let us know foolproof let’s in this episode of good mythical morning making conversations less awkward one conversation at a time that’s what we do here here here that’s in this episode what are we gonna land on a special spot it just hasn’t happened just gotta be a special day there’s a 1 in 8 chance that it will happen oh really we’ve had more than 8 episodes and it still hasn’t no link is an alien hey hello I am an alien I come in peace to destroy your planet that seems intuitive I knocked on my planet so but I peace do you mean that we’re gonna like hang out we’re gonna party with people that pervasive probably uh pervasive problems no lay down so that you can be probed I’m not going to do it I’m going to get my assistant to do it where’s your assistant he’s key he’s waiting he’s waiting up there oh oh he’s pointing at both of us it’ll come oh yeah he wants in on this conversation okay well he’s not wait wait a min well that’s not a finger that’s a probe that’s a bro