Panera versus Einstein Brothers. Who will win the bagel battle? Let’s talk about that Good Mythical Morning. Both Panera Bread and Einstein Brothers Bagels have been serving fast casual breakfast, brunch, and lunch to the masses for decades. Panera has amassed over twenty-one hundred locations in every state except Alaska and Hawaii. And Einstein Brothers isn’t too far behind. They got seven hundred locations across forty states. I’d say that’s a third the amount. Not too far behind. Okay. Trying to make it seem a little bit more even. People do have strong feelings about these two places. K Katie West tweeted, who the frick is still going to Panera when Einstein’s exists? Ooh, Katie. And Chris “Can Dof-It”? It’s Chris kind of fit. Okay. Or Chris “Can Dof-It” “Can Dof-It” tweeted, Panera bagels are better than Einstein Bros. Don’t argue. Well, we want to argue. Yeah, we kind of need them to argue. But you know what? They’re actually both owned by Panera brands. What? So it’s kind of a sibling rivalry when it really, you know, comes down to. Who’s gonna take it, big bro Panera or baby bro Einstein. It’s time for Food Feuds, Panera Bread versus Einstein Brothers Bagels. Okay, troglodytes. The winner of today’s Feud will be named the Baron of Breakfast and win the chance to sponsor a future GMM episode, and the crew tournament to predict your picks is still in full swing with Lisa in first place by a point. And, of course, you’re trying, first up, the breakfast sandwiches from each establishment. On Rhett’s side is Panera’s sausage, scrambled egg, and cheese on an Asiago cheese bagel for eight twenty-nine. And on Link’s side is Einstein Brothers’ All-Nighter Egg Sandwich on a cheesy, hash brown bagel. Interesting. For eight ninety-nine.. This is. That’s pretty good. Not bad at all. You know, I think we both have a little bit of a, let’s just be honest, bias against bagel places. Yeah, it seems like something for Yankees. Yeah, Yankees. Growing up in the south, we didn’t have. We didn’t know bagels. We were very. It was like, what’s this bread doughnut? I don’t understand it. And I just think that they’re all so hard, but they’re all not as hard. This is super soft, and it’s got this cheese on the outside, and when I think of Panera Bread, for some reason, I don’t think breakfast, I think, like soup, but I kind of forget, like, oh, it’s a bagel place. Here’s the thing I think about, Panera bread. No matter what you order, no matter how much bread you’ve ordered on the thing that you’ve ordered, they’re gonna give you another really hard piece of bread beside it. Yeah, they are. And then, what’s up with that? Is that, I’ve started to think, is that to bludgeon the person who gave it to me? No, probably not. Did you know that Panera. Because it would kill them. Is the Latin word for breadbasket? I figured as much. I’d like to punch him in the breadbasket. Okay. This has got some, no sausage but bacon. Yep, this hash browned, browned bread that you mentioned, Stevie, that’s. I’m telling you, I’ve never heard of that before. Cheesy Hash Brown Bagel. Is there, yeah, there’s, like, a little bit of potato? That’s what a hash brown is. These are cage free eggs. I can tell by, I can tell by reading my notes. This is good. It’s very cheesy. I like both of them. Yeah, they’re good. I like both of them quite a lot. I think I’m preferring the sausage to the bacon if I’m isolating the meat. Well. It’s a scrambled egg versus a fried egg. That’s my preference as well. They’re both very good. I think that they both bring a lot to the table. I’m gonna give them both an eight. Oh, really? Yeah, I don’t. You think they tie? I can’t tell you which one’s better. Oh, yeah, this is. This is a tough round. They are different. I have to agree, they’re equal. You know, Rhett, I’m gonna give it to you. That’s a wise choice that I’m just gonna completely bite off of. You said that you prefer two things about this one, though. I like the sausage better than I like the bacon. But there ain’t nothing wrong with the bacon. Sometimes you want bacon, and I like this bread better. Oh, you like that bread better? Oh, so they do even out for you. I like both breads, though. Okay. I’m going for eights across the board as well. Eight, eight, eight, eight. We’re kind of accomplishing nothing. Right. It’s like it didn’t even happen. Next up, we’ve got blueberry bagels. On Rhett’s side is Panera’s blueberry bagel for two seventy-nine, and on Link’s is Einstein Bros for two fifty-nine. Slightly cheaper. And slightly smaller. Is there a back to this bagel? Yep. A bagel back. Now, if you look at the back of the Panera bagel, it has none of that stuff. There’s none of that bagel dust. I think that’s just yeast. Cornmeal. Okay. Cornmeal, not yeast. I take it back. And it’s a darker, denser looking. It’s at least darker in color. Well, according to your fun fact, Link. I’m gonna take your fun fact. Really? Since you’re talking about the difference and we have some confirmation, because Chappie used to be an employee of Panera until we pulled them away from Panera to Mythical. I didn’t think we hired from Panera, but. No, it’s actually one of the best fields. You know? Everyone’s desperate to leave. Panera is just a feeder system to Mythical. Then why do I hate on it so much? Apparently, they bake in the morning. Well, all we know, that’s what Chappie said, and we know that. Yeah, it’s all on Chappie. Einstein prides themselves on baking all day. I mean, that’s a fine blueberry, bagel. So, they don’t know if it’s true. What’d you like, clean the bathrooms or something? I worked at the cash register. The cash register, okay. All right. Well, get over here to Einstein, because they are stingy with their blueberries. It looks like the same amount, but I don’t taste. True, true. If I want a blueberry bagel, I want to taste the blueberry. What about the chewiness? Because there’s something about a bagel. Very chewy. It’s supposed to be a little chewy, right? Yeah, but it’s gotta be, for it to be untoasted, for me, it’s gotta be a good bagel, which I don’t know if either Panera or Einstein is an untoasted bagel. Like, it looks a little hard, what you’re doing right now. These are hard. This one is a lot less fresh from Panera than Einstein’s, which tells me it supports that they bake throughout the day. Big blueberries. I mean, what time is it right now? It’s two AM? Right. We gotta get this thing uploaded real soon. This is, this doesn’t have the punch of blueberry that I want, but it’s a much better bagel. And I think I’m gonna weigh that more heavily, because there are blueberries there. I’m gonna give this a six. So I’m gonna start well, I’m gonna give this a five. Nope. I’m gonna give it a four. I’m giving it a four. I’m going five and seven. I’m going six over here. This round is all about the cream cheese. On Rhett’s side is Panera’s Plain, Reduced Fat Chive and Onion, and Reduced Fat Honey Walnut Cream Cheese for two eighty-nine each. And on Link’s side is Einstein Brothers Plain, Onion and Chive, Honey Almond Reduced Fat, and Strawberry Shmears for five twenty-nine each. So, they go out of their way to call them shmears instead of cream cheese. I think it’s because they are double whipped, and it’s gonna be a lot easier to just shmear it on there. You’re starting with the plain? I’m starting with the Honey Walnut. Cause that’s one of my favorites. And we are using the respective bagels from the respective places, cause we’re not barbarians. I do want to just stick a spoon in here. Honey walnut. That is a good, good little thing. Yeah, that’s nice. And I want to compare those apples to apples, but make sure to grab the other bagel. Good gosh, maybe I’ll just leave that on there. The holes on Einstein’s bagels are smaller than the holes on Panera’s bagels. That’s right. You’ve done it, Rhett. You’ve cracked the code. You can’t fool me. It is a lot easier to get through this shmear. It’s a lot easier to get into their bagels. Don’t they also have shmear at Bruegger’s, which we discovered? We don’t speak of Bruegger’s. It’s also owned by the same group. Bagels used to be owned by. I mean, not bagels. Einstein. Oh, man. Einstein used to be owned by Boston Market. So, they went under. Oh, man. Dang, let me. That’s good, isn’t it? Let me go. The shmear. I just made a mistake. The shmear is nice. Here we go. It’s so easier to dip. I think I’m just gonna. I think I’m just gonna use a spoon, and just make it just about the shmear. Just about the shmear. Honey Almond. What do I like better? We’ve come a long way for a couple of boys who were kind of scared of bagels. Yeah, don’t you just love the shmear? It’s airy. It’s way better. So, there’s more of a flavor distribution. You’re not fighting it. Is it called shmear because it’s whipped? No, it’s just a branding thing, I think. Double whipped. We want to believe he was right, though. I believe he was right. Okay. What do you mean, how am I right? You said you thought it was called shmear because it’s double whipped and Stevie said no. Well, that’s what makes it. But I. Don’t pit us against each other. We’re agreeing with each other, aren’t we? She’s saying it’s just a branding thing, Link. What? I think. Yeah. No, shmear is a verb. It’s what I’m saying. That when you double whip something, it makes it shmearable. No, shmear is a verb that you can shmear on things. I like the way you think, Link, but I don’t know if you’re right. But you sounded like you were right. You can shmear. I’m shmearing all of these. Agreed. But this one is more shmeerable. Therefore, they’ve called it shmeer. I don’t know if they, I don’t know. That’s why I was asking. Agreed, until the last point. I thought Stevie knew everything about bagels. It’s marketing. That’s what I said! Right, we’re agreeing. Are you nauseated by this? What’s up? I don’t understand. We are agreeing. I like this shmear. So good. Well, shmear me, silly. These are a good taste, but. If I didn’t know that these existed, I would be like, hey, I got some cream cheese, you know? And I like it. It’s good. If you really like a classic cream cheese, you might be upset with a little shmear. We have just learned that Einstein’s reward program is called the Scmear Society, which is close to the Mythical Society. So we also have that in common, I mean, not to sway the whole episode. You will be hearing from our attorneys, Einstein. I’m gonna give their non-shmear cream cheese a seven. What are you gonna give it? Six. Okay. I’m gonna give this double whipped shmear a ten. You believe it is the perfect shmear? It tastes great, and the consistency matters, the marketing is accurate. I don’t know if I’ve ever had a better shmear, but I believe that there might be one out there, so I’m gonna give it a nine. Your loss. Pin alert. It’s April’s pin, the chickatrice. It’s a babyfied version of the cockatrice. Yes, it’s Belvedere. It’s only available for twenty-four hours. This soft enamel pin with decorative card backing is available at mythical. com. I’m wearing it. You should, too. Yes. We’re moving on to muffins in this round. On Rhett’s side is Panera’s Chocolate Muffie for three fifty-nine. And on Link’s side is Einstein Brothers chocolate muffin for two ninety-nine. I don’t know what it says about me. Maybe it’s my problem, but I would have trouble ordering this. Yeah, it’s a hard word. Give me a Muffie. Give me a Muffie. Give me a Muffie. I think I’d be afraid to say it. I mean, why can’t you just call it a muffin top, you know? Give me the muffin top, darling. I wouldn’t say that. I’ve never called anyone a darling. What about a Muffie? I’ve never said it until today. Darling. I thought this was a cookie. Now. You and them soft cookies. This is, like, the fluffiest cookie I’ve ever had. It does not taste good. That’s cause you’re thinking of it as a cookie. Think of it as a muffin. I was thinking of it as a Muffie, and. It’s a chocolate chip muffin top, which is just a bad chocolate chip cookie. But here’s the thing. The whole time I’ve been eating it, I’ve been looking at this. Well, don’t look at that. And thinking about how good that’s gonna be just from looking at it, you know? Well, you think that looks good? Well, I’m gonna give it the best. You don’t think it looks good? Well, it’s haphazardly. Yeah, it looks like when you go to. Is this homemade? When you go to a coffee shop where they make their own stuff. Right. It’s got that vibe. I’m gonna bite that muffin top part there, it’s got a Muffie on it. Look, all you got to do is this, and you can. I made it into a Muffie. Don’t say that. I Muffied it. It’s so much better, like. Really. Einstein. We’ve been sleeping on y’all. Man. It’s crunchy. And it’s really moist on the inside. That’s because they didn’t chop it off and try to give you something cute. Look at that. Look at that. Quite a superior. That’s an incredible muffin. Chocolate bread products. Give them the numbers, Rhett. I want to be careful here, because Panera’s been slipping so far, and I don’t want them just to completely fall off the cliff. I mean. That consideration should not be taken into account. You hate it. You hate it. Three. I don’t think it’s that bad, I’m gonna give it a four, though. Okay. This is a quite nice muffin. I know there are muffins that are better than this. Hey. But I’ll give this a nine. It’s that good. It is a good muffin. It’s a really good muffin. It’s a surprisingly good muffin. Now, if they called it a Muffie. I’d hate it. Last but not least, we have cinnamon bagels. On Rhett’s side, we’ve got Panera’s Cinnamon Crunch Bagel for two seventy-nine. On Link’s side, we’ve got Einstein Brother’s cinnamon sugar bagel for two fifty-nine. Okay, cinnamon crunch versus cinnamon sugar. See? They put stuff on the inside. Neither one of these have a hole. Mine’s got a hole that got through. It got through the hole. Oh, there’s a little bit of a. They stuffed the hole. I feel like I have to break it. Yeah, that’s a good idea. Oh. Oh, it’s a different consistency. It’s almost like monkey bread in there. Monkey bread. You know, it’s like getting a. That you pull out of a pan. Very crunchy on top. They do not hold back on that cinnamon sugar concoction. This is one of the better things I’ve had from Panera today. Well, you liked round one. Yeah. Other than that, Panera has been, has been hurting in every round. Now. I don’t want to confuse my mouth. I’m getting all the cinnamon from Panera off of my fingers. Oh, really? Good idea. Get it out of here. Yeah. I want a sterile environment for Einstein. Okay, I’m gonna rip this puppy apart, too. This has got little chunks. What are these white chunks? Oh, it’s little apples. It’s little apples. No, it’s not. It’s little apples. Oh, so they made this into, like an apple strudel. It’s not what I expected. The top is way better, the inside, a little boring. Don’t tell them I said that. Why do you think the top is way better? This one’s crunchy. I just like it. It’s almost like an apple pie. That’s too cinnamony for me. It kicks it hard. We’re in high gear. I’m not a huge cinnamon in them. Well. Did they call it, Stevie, did you call it an apple thing? No, we’re just poking around to see if maybe they just had an apple thing out today and not just the cinnamon sugar one. Okay, yeah, they’re throwing apples in here, and that’s I don’t know how to judge them for that. Besides harshly. Really? I like it. Rhett likes it. He likes the surprise of a little apple, but not me. The bagel is so soft. Their bagels are so. But. This monkey bread over here, you’re right. You can slough off some of that crusty top layer if you want to, but there’s enough there if that’s what’s your jam. I’m gonna go with a nice, solid seven for Panera this round, which is the biggest favor I can give them. I’ll give a seven as well. I do like it quite a bit. Over here in, like, strangely unexpected apple zone. Yeah, I just don’t, I’m gonna try not to hold the apple against it, but. Why don’t you like apples? Well, it is like, it’s not the cinnamon, they do have a cinnamon sugar one, but this one is an apple cinnamon sugar, which, looking at the photos and everything, this is more of a one to one, because the cinnamon sugar one they have, it’s more baked in. And this one has crunchy top. And I think the crunchy top one to one is. Crunchy top. The crunchy top, there’s not nearly. They went light on it, and then nothing in the inside tells me that, there’s anything special happening here. It’s a three for me. Oh, my goodness. That hurts real bad. The fact that the inside is a little bit boring is a demerit, but I really love that top. I’m just going to say it all evens out, and I’m going to also give it a seven. You just can’t let Panera win, can you? Any round. Well, I could have given them a ten on this one, and it wouldn’t have done anything. Where do we land? Panera fifty-nine and Einsteins seventy-five. It wasn’t even close. Quite a blowout. Congratulations, Einstein Brothers. You’re officially the Baron of Breakfast. You’ve won a chance to sponsor a Future GMM episode. And I might actually go in your store now. Yes. And after this little episode, Lisa is still in the lead, but she’s now tied with Jenna. Oh, Lisa. Okay. Might have to duke it out in the HR department over there. Jenna’s gonna have to go over there. Yeah, all ties go to a bare-knuckle boxing fight. Thanks for subscribing and clicking that bell. You know what time it is. Let’s go get a Charged Lemonade. I’m John. I’m Sierra, and we just made Grilled Cheese Ramen from the Mythical Cookbook, while watching GMM, and it’s time to spin the Wheel of Mythicality. Extra Mythical. That’s good. Click the top link to see if we can figure out what fancy culinary terms actually mean in Good Mythical More. And to find out where the Wheel of Mythicality is gonna land. Don’t miss your chance to grab April’s Pin of the Month, available today only at mythical. com.