Reading can be fun…damentally demented. Let’s talk about that. ♪ (intro music) ♪ – Good mythical morning! – Sometimes being a kid can be downright confusing but thankfully, there are a bunch of bizarre books out there to make it even worse. I mean, better. I mean, now I’m confused. It’s time to play… ♪♪ Okay Rhett, how many kids do you have? – Two. – Check. And what current reading level are you at? – At least sixth grade. – Okay Rhett, that’s all you need to know – to ascertain whether these book titles– – That’s right, sixth graders. these book titles that I’m gonna give to you are real– – An actual book. – Factional or fake– – You made ’em up. – fictional books that I– – Okay. – made up. If you get five out of these right, you win a fully customized children’s book about you. – Wow. – Not for you but about you. – There isn’t already one of those? – Are you ready – no – are you ready for this? – I’m ready. – Factional or fictional: – Is that a real book? – That would’ve been helpful for me. Ooh your dad is watching. You’ve made this weird. Uh…you know what, I’m going to say that that is… factional! That’s right, Rhett. You know what, it is. Check it out right here. The Night Dad Went to Jail. I’ve bookmarked a little excerpt. – Is the dad a rabbit? – (reading) This is one of my before drawings. Before means before my dad went to jail. – (crew member laughs) – He had a lot of fun with dad before he got locked up! – We went fishing now we can’t even touch! – Alright Rhett, you’re not on a roll yet because there’s only – you only answered one question– – Okay. – so far. That doesn’t count as a roll. – Okay, alright. – You just got one right. It’s just a little blip. Factional or fictional: (laughter) Why are we laughing – why am I smiling why are you laughing? I’m not. I mean, that’s the problem. Uh… I don’t think that’s how you would say it if it were real. So I’m going to say… fictional! I got news for you and I got the book for you. (Rhett) Really? (Link) I Wish Daddy Didn’t Drink So Much by Judith Vigna. Read a little bit for you here. (Link reading) Daddy was asleep when we got home, but next morning he said, “Thank you for your card, sweetheart – I love it, and I love you, too! Sunday we’ll go sledding, I promise.” I didn’t really believe him about Sunday but I guess it’s okay. – (laughter) – I’ve heard that before, daddy. Sledding. That’s never happening unless by sledding you mean you just sit there and drink. (laughing) Let’s take a moment of sadness. Okay, let’s move on. Factional or fictional: Wow. Derek. Now that’s definitely believable. There’s a lot of Dereks who are moving in on the scene– – Mhmm. – out there. It’s a popular name– – Mhmm. – for a guy who likes to move in on a family. – Mhmm. – Fictional. You did the reach. – Well, uh oh, faked you out? – Yeah. I mean that was– – That was too obvious. – way too much of a tell. I’m gonna reach over there, he’ll think I’m reaching for Derek. Hey, that just reflects what I think of you– – Okay, alright. – I’m sorry, I apologize. But after those other two books, I think it’s gonna be in development soon. – Please do that for Derek’s sake. – It is fake. Factional or fictional? You know what, we’ve talked about this, about how you’re gonna outlive your pet – most likely and your kids need to be prepared for that. – Yeah we talk about this a lot. – Yeah, yeah about dead dogs quite a bit. – Yeah, it’s cool. – It’s a cool topic. – Sparky’s Last– (Both) Breath. Sparky, though, Sparky. That is the quintessential dog name. Oh the reach. (crew laughs) Reverse psychology doesn’t work on me, Link. That is factional! Break it out and read it! (laughs) I made that one up. – But we should write it! – So if there’s a name in there, it’s made up. Derek, Sparky. Got it. I sense a pattern. (crew laughs) – Is that a statement or is that a book? – Yeah, I was just talking. No, that’s a – – that’s a book. Factional or fictional? – It Hurts When I Poop, is this like a hemorrhoid help thing? Kids don’t get hemorrhoids. Or do they? I guess there are other ways that poop can hurt. (crew laughing) – I think if I just be quiet– – It Hurts When I Poop. – you’ll say– – It Hurts When I Poop. some more stupid stuff, which is great for the show. Oh gosh. Uh, full disclosure, it does hurt when I poop. Fictional. Fictional. You made this – gosh! – Really? – It Hurts When I Poop. – Yeah ’cause there’s a dinosaur in your lap. – A story for children who are scared to use the potty. (Link reading) Sometimes it came out as hard little balls. Other times, it came – out as one big ball. – Yeah, right. – (crew laughs) – The little balls, that’s just fun, – (crew laughs) – you know? That’s like, I’m a rabbit today! – I always loved – or a deer. – No, that still hurts for kids, man, Or a goat. The little balls are the best, man. It happened to me all the time as a kid. – Never happens now, what am I doing wrong? – (crew laughs) – It’s like put ’em in a shotgun shell. – Yes. No. I’m not doing too well, am I? How many have I got right? – I got two right. – Two right. Oh I gotta get two – I gotta get five out of eight. I gotta get – I gotta sweep. Sweep it up, buddy. – Oh gosh. – (crew laughs) Whose Bottom Is This? is like identifying animal butts? I’m just looking at the title of an actual book that I’m reaching for. That is a good idea for a book. Almost too good. Hasn’t happened yet. Fictional. Whose Bottom Is This? (Rhett) Okay, what is that? It’s a white- tailed deer, no? That’s the black-tailed deer. It’s a white butt. It’s a white scrotum. – It’s a bighorn sheep. – Oh bighorn sheep. That’s a bighorn down there. Okay, here we go. – Oh, no excerpt, just a picture. – Yeah I just wanted to show you the back of a bighorn sheep. I know what that looks like now. Factional or fictional: Unicorns are Jerks. While true, I believe that as title, it is fictional. – Final answer? – Yeah. Really? What if it was like a coloring book? – Would that make it– – I don’t know if you’re being a friend or – a jerk at this point. But the name of the book– – Am I a unicorn? – The name of the book– – Do I have a coloring book? is Unicorns are Jerks. I’m gonna stick with my guns and say– But what if it was a coloring book that I’m reaching for? – You don’t – you always trick me, though. – (crew laughs) You always trick me. I’m gonna say fictional. It’s a coloring book. Unicorns are Jerks. This page, which you can– – So you’re being a friend now. – color later. (Link reading) Unicorns eat your leftovers. You were saving that! Why are we supposed to hate unicorns? What good – what good does that add to the world? Hey that’s your homework, buddy. That’ll answer your question. – What good does this add to the world, – Alright– – Theo Nicole Lorenz? – This is just for– – Theo Nicole, what kind of name is that anyway? – Don’t belittle them ’cause you didn’t – you didn’t believe it was real. All or nothing, Rhett? It’s all coming down to this. Who cares about the score? Personalized book ’cause we’ve already made it. You win it if you get this one – right. The House That Crack Built. – The House That Crack Built? – Crack Built. Like the drug. – There’s no way that that would be real. – But I’ve been so wrong. – You’ve been so wrong. Is there another book over there? – I’m reaching for something. – I think I saw another book. Yeah, I’m gonna say this one’s factual. You’re right, Rhett! The House That Crack Built. Check this out. (Link reading) And this is the crack that numbs the pain, bought from the boy feeling the heat, chased by the cop working his beat, who battles the gang fleet and elite, that rules the street of a town in pain, that cries for the drug known as cocaine, made from the plants that people can’t eat, raised by the farmers who work in the heat, and fear the soldiers who guard the man, who lives in – the house that crack built. – Doesn’t even rhyme at the end. – (crew laughing) – Nothing rhymed with built. Well it’s a parody. It’s a parody of a famous– – That wouldn’t have been on the book mobile– – book– – at Buies Creek Elementary School. – that also did well. We would have not let that be on the book mobile. – Alright Rhett. – Tell you that right now. – Well I lost big. – But you know what, I will reveal your – personalized book that I’ll read to my kids. – Okay, you get to keep it. Alright. Watch out, kids! Thanks for liking, commenting, and subscribing. You know what time it is. – Hi, I’m Tom. – And I’m Becky and we’re from Washington state. – We’re vacationing in Victoria, BC, Canada. – And it’s time… (Both) to spin the Wheel of Mythicality! I’ll tell you what is factional, the fact that we got a Good Mythical Morning t-shirt available for you at RhettandLink.com/store. Click through to Good Mythical More. Click that ‘i’. We’re gonna remead – read – – remead? We’re gonna– – We’re gonna immediately read. dramatically read It Hurts When I Poop. Rhett thinks the mic is a tiny person. – I have someone I would like to introduce you to. – Okay, do you? Sure, I love to meet new people. His name is Mike. Uh… – Don’t, don’t– – Hello? Don’t talk about his appearance. -Uh, you mean this microphone? – He likes to be whispered into. (whispering) He likes to be whispered at like this so get in there. (whispering) It hurts him if you don’t whisper. (whispering) Hey Mike. It’s nice to meet you, dude. (whispering) He likes to be licked like an ice cream cone, too. Captioned by Lovely Luna GMM Captioning Team ♪ (outro music) ♪