(rooster crows) (tiger growls) (dramatic thud) (Wheel of Mythicality clicking) – Ooh, you know, you wanted to find out where dat wheel was gonna land, and there it is. Welcome to “Good Mythical More,” can we smell frozen foods and identify what they are? Because that’s a skill we all need. – Don’t freak out, but you stepped on a crack in the sidewalk! – Don’t freak out, but your mother’s back is currently being broken. – But it doesn’t matter because she’s naked. – And you never loved her anyway. – Right. (crew laugh) Who are we kidding? I mean, she was really, she was into her career more than she was into you. – All moms aren’t great moms. – Yeah. – Just, you know? – Yeah. – Just move on. – Right. You can always find another one. – Why you been dodging cracks this whole time? – My- – True, true, my mom actually did break her back. – I remember that, in her Toyota van. – What was that van? – It was a tan van that like, it was shaped- – It was like a space van. – It was shaped like a Volkswagen, what’s the most famous Volkswagen van? – Bus. – The Bus. – VW Bus. – But it’s shaped like that. – It had a stumpy front on it, and you like, you kinda sat on the motor to drive. – Yes, just like the VW Bus. – And she, I mean- – It was in Lillington. – I don’t think she had- – Near the river. – I think she’s okay. Well, I know she’s okay. – I think she’s okay. – Yeah, that thing. – Yes! – She had, we had one of those. That was our family van. – I thought it was so cool. – It took her a while to recover, but like, she doesn’t, to break your back, and to not have any lasting side effects, that’s pretty phenomenal. That’s my mom for ya. Love you, mom. – My, for lack of a better word- – I didn’t step on a crack either. – For a lack of a better way to describe it, my taint is very cold right now. – Okay. – Like, as cold as it has ever been. – Taint too hot? (bell rings) – This episode of “Good Mythical More” is brought to you by frozentaints.com. The reason I did that is because this is a “Good Mythical S’more,” which means that the Mythical Society voted on what would happen, and they said that, they actually went along with Kevin Hamilton’s suggestion, 240 volts, 240 volts! (laughs) (Link mimics electricity zapping) For a washing machine! It was every time the bell rings, whoever’s talking has to plug a fake sponsor. – Yep, yep. – So, frozentaints.com was the first sponsor that came to my mind because my taint is freezing. – Helps you walk better when your taint’s frozen. Okay. – It’s probably doing something to my sperm count, although I can’t deploy any sperm in the summer. – That’s fine and dandy. – Yeah. (crew laugh) – All righty, let’s bring in the first one that we’re gonna smell of. Because you know, maybe you’re like stumbling late at night into the kitchen, and you wanna thaw out something, but you don’t wanna turn on any lights. So, it’s in a bowl? Can I like grab it, like it’s in a bowl or something? Okay, a plate. Okay. I’m gonna take a second sniff, then I’ll give it to you. – Just let me know when it’s ready. – Third sniff, it’s gonna take a third sniff. – I mean, the molecules aren’t moving fast enough to get to your nose. – Okay, there you go. Yeah, I just, I mean, you can’t touch it with your nose, that would be cheating. Are you getting anything? Frozen? – Maybe a meat. (bell rings) Maybe a meat. Meet your next partner at Maybe A Meet! (crew laugh) You show up at the spot, and maybe they’ll be there, and maybe they won’t. That’s part of the adventure! – Ooh. – MaybeAmeet.com. Maybe just a trip to the coffee shop by yourself. (crew laugh) Act like you’re writing something important. MaybeAMeet.com. – Yeah, always bring your laptop. MaybeAMeet.com. – No, no, and now I smell cake. (laughs) Apparently that’s not right. – [Stevie] Do you wanna guess? – I’m ready to guess. – [Stevie] Okay, three, two, one. – Chocolate. – Pork. – [Stevie] No, this is a Stevie soccer practice special. – Oh, oranges. (crew laugh) – No, I think you’d smell frozen orange. – What did you do at soccer practice? – [Stevie] I feel like I literally, I feel like we’ve had this conversation. – You’ve told us, but. – [Stevie] One of the things was a California roll from the grocery, which is dangerous in the early 2000s. – And a frozen. – [Stevie] And the other thing is a frozen snack that you put into the toaster oven. – Oh, Toaster Strudel? – Pop Tart? – [Stevie] Thanks for listening, guys. – Oh, Bagel Bites. – [Stevie] Yeah. – You, oh, toaster oven, okay. Man, see. – I did smell the meat. I did say pork. – I smelled the chocolate. (Stevie and Rhett laugh) – Smell the chocolate. – I mean, think of chocolate, and it could smell like chocolate. – Yeah, that could smell like chocolate. – It just smells like ice. – It smells like whatever you put in your head before you smell it. – Right. All right, let’s go under again. – What, why is cold stuff not smell? – Because it- – Scientifically. – Freezes in the smells. – Because you’re literally, when you smell something, you’re literally smelling molecules. – Bring it. – And they’re coming off of it when it’s hot, and therefore, they’re not when it’s frozen. I think that’s why things being frozen is safe, because it like stops it, it slows down anything that’s happened. – Okay, I think I know what this is. Don’t, I. – Yes? – Yep, take it. – It’s heavy, oh it’s a heavy one. – Okay, I think I know what this one is. – Oh, that’s got a floral smell. – Yeah. I wouldn’t describe it as floral. – It’s a sweet smell. – Yeah, a sweetie. (bell rings) This is brought to you by Sweetie, Sweetie Pie, Sweetie Pie Sweets. It’s where you go to get all your sweets and pies! I really can’t, I’m not good at improv when I have on a mask. (Rhett laughs) – He’s like a crocodile, when you cover up his eyes, he just. (Stevie laughs) – I mean, and my eyes are closed underneath. – He can’t think creative thoughts. – That’s right, I cannot be creative when my eyes are closed, (crew laughing) and I have on a blindfold. – Sweetie Pie’s! (Link laughs) Here’s what you want if you want some Sweetie Pie. – And I am toast. Is that toast? – [Stevie] Three, two, one. – Cantaloupe. – I smell strawberries. – [Stevie] Okay, you guys are in the right, like general, yeah, it’s a fruit. – Fruit. – Melon. – [Stevie] No. – I thought it was a melon. Are you smelling it again? ‘Cause I should get another smell too. – Wow, melon, cantaloupe. – That’s what, I guessed that earlier. – Okay, yeah, ’cause now that you put that thought in my head. – Now I smell strawberries. – Yeah, ’cause I put that thought in your head. I put the strawberries in your head, you put cantaloupe in my head. Hmm, what could it be? – [Stevie] Tropical. – Pineapples. – Pineapple. – [Stevie] Yeah. – Oh, it’s hard to smell. – Oh, it is a whole half pineapple. – Look at that. (bell rings) – Are you interested in a pineapple, but just a half of one? – I am. – Well, go to wholehalfpineapple.org. (crew laugh) 30% of every purchase goes towards someone else in another part of the world, who gets the other half of the pineapple. – And 50% of the pineapple goes to 30% of other people. – And then, you become pen pals, or should I say, pine pals? (crew laugh) – That’s good, see? It’s easier without a mask. – (laughs) When you can see, yeah. – Right, you can think with your eyes. – Yeah. – All right, let’s go again. – My taint is still very cold. It’s probably doing something good for me. Do you know that bicyclists suffer disproportionately from erectile dysfunction? (bell rings) (everyone laughs) Are you one of those guys that’s always out on his bike with a thin little seat? Well, you know what you’re gonna have to worry about in the future? ED, erectile dysfunction, so get one of those big, fat Earth Cruiser seats. (crew laugh) But keep everything else the same, BigFatEarthCruiserSeats.net, you’re gonna still be cool, wear the spandex, go up and down the hills, wear the uniform, but have a big-ass seat! (crew laugh) I’ve always, I’ve thought about that. I’ve literally thought, could I get like an expensive bicycle, but I have a big, wide seat, and what would people think? What’s the disadvantage of big, wide seat? – Well, if you want erectile dysfunction, then that you wouldn’t wanna pick that seat. – What? Do you have the blindfold on right now? (laughs) (crew laugh) Is that what’s happening? – I mean, I tried to come up with the only negative for a big seat, and it’s- – The big seat helps with ED, ’cause it doesn’t go right up in there. It’s the pressure of the tiny little thin seat that gives you the ED. You spread it out, and it’s still like sitting on a stool, there’s no problem. – I understand, but what I said didn’t make sense. I’m blindfolded, man, leave me alone over here. I have no clue what I’m smell either. – I smell chocolate. – I did, I smelled chocolate. Okay, good, I’m ready to guess. – [Stevie] Three, two, one. – Pudding. – Chocolate cake. – [Stevie] No, but there is chocolate involved. – Swiss cake roll. – Chocolate cake. – [Stevie] No, it’s something that you like, but usually don’t like it without the chocolate. I mean, you usually like it without the chocolate. – What, I like it without the chocolate? – [Stevie] Yeah, you specifically. – A chocolate-covered. – Oh, cookies. – Chocolate-covered- – Cookie dough. – [Stevie] Yeah, yeah. – Oh, Link, look at you, man. – Oh, wow. – Look what’s about to happen with you. – Wow, it hardly smells at all. ‘Cause I’m afraid to get too close to it without my blindfold on. – You’re not gonna eat some of it? (bell rings) Do an ad for it. – Hey, thanks for joining us. This portion of today’s “Good Mythical More” is brought to you by Cookie Log. Look at how long that log is. I just wanna bite into it. You like to bite logs? Do you like to eat cookies? Well, combine both into one experience that you’ll never forget. It’s a log made out of cookies. (crew laughing) – That’s a, that’s a real interesting way to see it. – CookieLog.com. – I don’t have to ring the bell for this one to let you know that this portion of today’s “Good Mythical More” is brought to you by the color changing, heat, well, heat-activated mug is what we call it. – Whoa! – Because when you pour hot liquids into it, that happens. – Oh my gracious, look at what happened. – Get yours at Mythical.com. – And as it cools, it stops showing the thing. I thought that my body heat would eventually transfer to the corn, and the corn would melt. But the corn is not melting, if you know what I’m saying. (laughs) – Man, what you got there? – What you got there? Okay. Is there something else to smell? – You know what, Rhett? I’d love for you to smell first. – Hmm, thank you, Link. Oh. – You think you got this one? – Oh, hold on, yeah, I got it. Oh, oh, oh. Oh, what is that? Oh, what is that? It’s so familiar! – I a need a turn. – Ooh. (crew laugh) – Did you drop it? What happened? – It moved. – Oh, it’s alive. – No, no, no. – If this is Craig the snake, I am gonna punch something. – It, no, it’s a fruity candy. – Did y’all freeze a snake? – No, no, no, it’s fruity, it’s a fruity candy. What could that be? – Ah. – What could that be? Now I’m smelling my beard, ’cause it went in there. It’s a fruity, it’s a fruity. It’s A fruity liquid, but it was like in the shape of a disc. – How do you know it was in the shape of a disc? – Well, because it’s the way it slid on the. – Oh, it’s on my chin now. (crew laugh) I’ve touched it on my chin. – Oh, oh. (bell rings) Oh, it’s over here. – No, what? – Now it’s over here. – No, it’s over here. – This episode is brought to you by Now It’s Over Here. – But it’s over here. (Stevie laughs) – It’s just a website where there’s a frozen fruit thing of some sort, that’s just moving around. – And you think it- – And it goes over there, well, now it’s over here! – Now it’s over there. – It’s a really cool website to visit when you’re in a certain particular state. And I don’t mean like one of the 50 states, if you know what I’m saying, if you know what I’m saying, maybe 51 with DC coming along. (laughs) – He means lost. Or blindfolded. – Right. – I’m ready to guess, but it’s on my chin, and I don’t know what it is. – [Stevie] Three, two, one. – Applesauce. – I think it’s a bar of like a orangecicle. Like a- – Yeah, it’s a fruit bar. It is not applesauce. – I thought it was a frozen disc of applesauce, because it got a little liquidy on my chin. – [Stevie] Yeah. – Why did I think that was a disc? – [Stevie] What, I don’t know if you’re gonna be able to guess the specific, oh, you’re looking at it. (crew laugh) – No, no, no, no, don’t tell him. – What? – I think it’s blackberry? (laughs) – [Stevie] No, it’s grape. – Grape. – Oh, what is that? – It’s a grape, it’s a grape frozen fruit bar. – I know, the brains just don’t really wanna work. – Man, that’s gonna stain something. – Like my chin? – Don’t get that on your shirt, don’t get all that on your new shirt. – Did I stain my chin? (bell rings) Welcome to ChinStain.com. – Oh God. (crew laugh) Hold on, you gotta do an ad. We’re not welcoming them to the, welcome to ChinStain.com. – No, ChainStrain.com bought out our entire show. – Oh! (laughs) – Yeah, this is a new show. – This is a hard joke, it is ChinStain.com. – Chin stain. – Right? – Don’t get too close, ’cause it’ll get on your chin. You know, chin stain, boy, that sounds naughty, but why should it? – Yeah, a chin stain can come from anything. Usually it just comes from smelling something with a blindfold on that has the potential to stain your chin. Now, it can mean other things as well. – You ever been looking for the perfect reason to grow a goatee? Look no further than this show, which we now call ChinStain.com. – Side effects of chin stain include people staring at you, (laughs) people are saying, hey, there’s something on your chin. (Rhett and Link laugh) People saying, ah, I don’t, I feel like I should tell you, you know there’s something on your chin. – Yes. – A stain of sorts. – It’s there permanently, it’s a stain. – Yeah, yeah, and then you say, it’s a birthmark. And then they’re like, oh, cool, oh, cool. – No, it’s not a birthmark, notabirthmark.com redirects to Chin Stain, the show. – Yeah, yeah, yeah, but it’s not a birthmark, it’s a stain. – It’s there forever though. – Right. – It’s hard to smell frozen stuff and identify it. – Frozen things. – It’s even harder. – Is there more? – To keep smelling. – [Stevie] Yeah. – I actually am starting to settle into my seat now. I feel like I’ve reached equilibrium with it. – Okay, this has pungent smell to it. – There’s an equal transfer between me and the corn at this point. – Is this food? – [Stevie] I mean, yes? But it does not look like the thing that it is. – Is it sour? It’s pungent, it’s. – [Stevie] No, it’s not sour, but it should be pungent. – Plate of dog dookie, man, I don’t know what it is. – Plate of dog dookie, man. (bell rings) (crew laughs) This portion of ChinStain.com is brought to you by PlateOfDogDookie.org. (laughs) – A dog dookie looks different on a plate, you know? – Now, what you really don’t want- – It’s kinda lipstick on a pig. – If you get too close to a plate of dog dookie, you might get a chin stain, and that’s a chin stain you don’t wanna deal with. – What’s that on your chin? – Is that a birthmark? No, it’s a little dog dookie. Oh, my chin stain. – I don’t know what that is. – It came from APlateOfDogDookie.org. – You know what that is? Plate of dog dookie. (Rhett laughs) – The dog dookie sounds like a song that you’re asking somebody to play. Play the dog dookie. (crew laughs) – Hey man. – Hey, listen, when I get up there, I’m gonna turn around, I’m gonna put my hand. I’m gonna put my hand down like this, and then I’m gonna come up like this! And when I do that, play the dog dookie. – Play the dog dookie. – And then I’ll do the dog dookie dance. – Play the dog dookie, everybody do the dance. – Have you ever coordinated with a DJ at a party in that way? Like, when I do this, do that? That’s my goal for 2021, man. Coordinate with a DJ. (laughs) CoordinateWithADJ.net. – [Stevie] You wanna guess? – This segment of PlateOfDogDookie.com, and show chin- – ChinStain.com is brought to you by CoordinateWithADJ.net. – Yeah, yeah, I don’t know what this is. – Promise me we will coordinate with a DJ next time we have the opportunity. – Spirit is broken, I promise. – I think that’s a taco. – [Stevie] It looks more like a taco than what it actually is. – It feels like it has like a little flair to it. Like maybe there’s a chili powder. – Can I give it another? – I feel, I smell chili powder. Is that crazy? – I thought it was like, I don’t know. – [Stevie] It looks like it might be a little tiny bit seasoned, but- – Okay, I got it, let’s just guess. – [Stevie] Okay, three, two one. – A little bit seasoned? – Ground beef. – Slab of meat. – [Stevie] Oh yeah, you’re both closer, but it’s salmon, and it looks not like salmon. (crew laugh) – What? – That looks like the kind of, that looks like some, like a dog food salmon. – What is happening with this? – [Crew Member] Flip it over. – Oh, wow, look. – Whoa. – [Crew Member] It’s got like a seasoned butter on it, I guess. – Oh, it’s got seasoned, it’s got a seasoned butter. – It’s encased in seasoned butter. – It doesn’t, it only smells like the marinade. It’s, I think it’s like Italian dressing. – [Crew Member] Ooh. – It smells kinda like Italian dressing. – Where’d you get this from? – [Crew Member] Walmart. – Walmart, the source for Italian coated salmon. (crew laugh) – Italian coated salmon. – [Stevie] Okay, you have one more. – Okay. – That’s good news. (crew laugh) I don’t like smelling stuff blindfolded. – It’s disconcerting to you, isn’t it? – Yeah. – Well, I’ll smell it. – I’m afraid I might get another chin stain. Well, this one’s a tray. – Oh, we got a whole tray? – [Stevie] Yeah, maybe don’t touch it, maybe just- – I just, I touched it. – [Stevie] I saw it. – What? Saw it? – As I was saying, don’t touch it, Rhett was touching it. – I gained nothing from that, I’ll be honest with you. It felt like a football. (crew laugh) – What, is it, where is it? – I don’t know, part of it’s over here, the part I touched. – Oh. – Is it like the bottom half of a log? (crew laugh) It’s very wide. Is it like one of those- (bell rings) Is this one of those logs you’d find in the forest? – Oh, this segment of ChinStain.com is brought to you by Wide Log. (Rhett and crew laugh) You’ve seen a long log and you’ve seen a round log, but have you ever seen a wide log? – Do you ever get the feeling that your log isn’t wide enough? (crew laugh) Well, they do say that girth is the most important aspect of a log. So, don’t get left out, don’t get left in the dust. Go to WideLog.gov. (laughs) (crew laugh) Yes, this is officially a part of the new administration’s plan, it is to make- – I can’t smell anything. – Logs wider everywhere! – [Stevie] This- – It’s a wide log, right? – We need a hint, man. – [Stevie] Is not edible. It is, mm. – What’s that noise? – Nothing. (crew laugh) – [Stevie] What’s a hint? – You touching it? – No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. – [Stevie] I mean, you’re touching it repeatedly. I would feel like you would get the hint. Link, you can also touch it a little. – I don’t really wanna touch it. – Well, oh. – Ooh. – It is a wide log. – What is that? That’s, it’s got skin. – Well, it’s got clothes on it. It’s in cl, it’s clothes. – What? – It’s clothes. (crew laugh) – What? – It’s clothes. – Is that leather? – It’s clothes wrapped around something. It’s clothes wrapped around like a membrane of sorts. I mean, around like a skeleton of sorts. – Oh, what is that? – What is this? This could be anything. (crew laughing) – Yeah. – I think it’s just a pair of overalls. – What is this? – Pair of overalls! – [Stevie] Yeah, it’s just jeans. – Oh, it’s britches. – Oh. – [Stevie] Because people actually do put their jeans in the freezer to clean them instead of washing them, ’cause they think it makes the denim last longer. So some places tell you to put your jeans in the freezer instead of washing them. – Like, it kills anything? – You don’t have to wash jeans. There was a dude who went with, who went over a year without washing his jeans, and it was like, they determined you didn’t need to wash jeans. – Look at this. (jeans crack) Well, that’s a sound. – I mean, I would rarely wash my jeans. (jeans crack) Boy, put those on. (crew laugh) You think you could get those on? 32, 30, man, I think you could get them on. – Get the, I mean, you’re the one with the frozen taint, you’d be ready for this. (Rhett laughs) – If I could get my taint in those jeans, I would. – This is like a Japanese game show challenge. Who can get in the frozen jeans the fastest? – Oh, yeah, that’s good. – We’re not gonna do it now, ’cause we’re gonna do this as an episode probably. – Right. (tray clanks) Oh, I thought that would be more satisfying. (tray clanks) I thought it would be a gong, but it wasn’t. – [Link] Add some scientific magic to your Mythical mug collection with the “GMM” heat-activated mug. Available now at Mythical.com.