Welcome to Good Mythical More. Commercials get crazy. Don’t they? They do. Sometimes, you’re like, “What are they… What’s even being advertised here?” I was so distracted, I didn’t even know what they were advertising. So let’s see if we can figure out what’s being advertised if the object of the advertisement is excised. Excise advertisements. Right. That’s what we’re calling it. It’s “Excised Advertisements,” you’re gonna be asking for it every Good Mythical More! But first, how ’bout a little random disturbing fact? An exhibition in Dublin in 2013 displayed a variety of cheeses made with the bacteria samples obtained from real people’s feet, armpits and belly buttons. Is this a multiple choice? It’s just a fact. All of the above. Yeah, it was called “Self-Made.” It was part of the Grow Your Own, Life After Nature exhibition. Okay. You know what? I think I’d eat it. Because you’re not eating people’s feet, you’re eating the bacteria from their feet. And really, what the bacteria have produced. That’s some funky- I bet that’s some funky cheese. Oh, but it says each cheese supposedly smells similar to the donor’s body odor. I’m not interested. But you know what? Sometimes, stink make me horny, so if it was the right person’s cheese… It feels like a cue for a band to start playing. “Stink make me horny,” and then- Yeah, let’s do that. Can we work up a “stink make me horny” theme? Actually, you know what? You know how they say that you are attracted to someone, like, if somebody goes out and works out, and they take off the shirt, and you smell it, and you like it, you’re probably attracted to them. It’s a pheromones thing. We did it on the show many years ago. I don’t think it’s you’re- Not the one we did on the show, it wasn’t “are you attracted to them.” I just wanna clarify for people, ’cause the crew members- But that is how it works. So I think, basically, what you should do before you get into a serious relationship is you should eat that person’s cheese. There should be a service, I’m gonna start it, where you make cheese based on your body and then your partner eats it, and you see if this is gonna be a long-term thing or not. If you can’t eat their cheese, you’re not gonna spend a lifetime together. Okay. Eating cheese. Yeah, eating people’s cheese. Yeah, I get it. I mean, I definitely know Christy would say, “cheese make me horny.” Yeah, right, uh-huh, yeah. But does Link-cheese make her horny? That’s really the question. Link make me horny. And does Christy-cheese make you horny? It’s very close to “stink make me horny.” All right, let’s see this first ad. That’s what the shirt says on the back. Excise ad. “Link-cheese make me horny.” Okay, wait. So it’s excise in a different way. We’re gonna play it up to a certain point, and then we’re gonna pause it before it’s revealed. That’ll work! That’s easier. Let’s see the first one. It’s Nannerpuss! ♪ You can call me Nannerpuss, Nannerpuss ♪ ♪ And guess what, I love- ♪ Pancakes. Nannerpuss? Yeah. Nannerpuss lost an eye early in this advertisement. Yeah, and they still used it. So to just give you an idea of the budget we’re working with. No, they have a sense of humor here, I think. Nannerpuss… I have options for you, but I would like you to guess without any options. Well, he looks like he’s protecting the pancakes. And if he were to, like, be lifted off of them, then maybe he’s got syrup all up inside of himself and he’s about to crap it out onto the pancakes as they lift him away from it. I think it’s a syrup advertisement. So it is American. Yeah. ‘Cause this already seems very British. It looks like there’s a fake eyelash on the plate. I don’t think- You know what? I don’t think it’s a food ad, it’s not a food product at all. Because it’s not appetizing in any way. Do you think syrup’s gonna come out of the peel? No, I don’t. I don’t think, I don’t think. I think it’s for something non-food related. Nannerpuss… It’s a banana octopus. I think it’s like, “Eat the right things, kids. Don’t eat carb-y banana- Uh, carb-y pancakes, eat a banana and these little gummy squids that are on the plate.” You think it’s a PSA? It’s a PSA for children. No, no, no, no, no. No, think about it. Nanner-puss. It’s tampons for grandmas. Okay, yep. Yeah. Final answer. I’m with Link on this one. That’s with the fake eyelashes! So it’s like post-menopausal- Uh, close. So close. But your options are IHOP’s Rooty Tooty Fresh and Fruity, which is one of the scents of the Nannerpuss tampon line. They do put bananas on stuff there. Bisquick banana pancakes mix or Denny’s Grand Slam. I’m going with Bisquick. So you’re saying it’s like, maybe grandmas who just, menopause never happens. Is that what you’re saying? Right. Okay, yeah. So IHOP, Bisquick, or… IHOP. Denny’s. It’s IHOP because IHOP has a really strange and crazy- I’m going with Bisquick. Sense of humor. Bisquick banana mix. Okay, let’s see. It’s Nannerpuss! ♪ You can call me Nannerpuss, Nannerpuss ♪ ♪ And guess what, I love pan- ♪ Isn’t it time for a serious breakfast? This Tuesday from 6:00 AM to 2:00, Denny’s is giving a free Grand Slam to everyone in America. Oh, and Kevin Costner did the voiceover! Play that again, was that Kevin Costner? I do not- No. ♪ Guess what, I love pan- ♪ Not that part! Isn’t it time for a serious breakfast? No, that’s not Kevin Costner, dude. Denny’s is giving a free Grand Slam to everyone in America. You gotta watch “Yellowstone,” man, that’s not Kevin Costner. He doesn’t talk like that. All right, Denny’s, so we both got it wrong. But they were making fun of IHOP. “Isn’t it time for a serious-” Oh, yeah, Rooty Tooty Fresh and Fruity. They’re making fun of IHOP. “Isn’t it time that you watch a cowboy film with lots of F-words?” That’s what my mom said, she said, “You know, I’m trying to get into that ‘Yellowstone-‘” It’s not a film, it’s a TV series. “But they say-” Well, she called it film. It’s a very long film. I called it a film and she said, “I’m trying to get into it, but they say so many F-words.” She didn’t like that? “So many F-words, but I’ve gotten used to it.” Yeah, yeah, yeah. You adjust. Okay, next one. No! Recognize him. Okay, so- That is Chris… Was he on the show? Yeah! Wax candle. Sullivan. Chris Sullivan! Chris Sullivan! Is it him, though? Well, play it again. Definitely! That’s Chris Sullivan. No, I think it’s Kevin Costner. No! It definitely could be Chris Sullivan. Yes, that’s Chris Sullivan! Can we move on to something that I don’t know? Well, it looks like Chris Sullivan for now, as we Google it. No, that’s- Oh, you’re standing by this. You are definitively believing this is Chris Sullivan. There’s nothing that can change your mind. The man sniffed wax out my belly button! I think it’s him. I know him when I see him! I think it’s him. Okay. Yeah, and his voice! We’ll try and verify that, but what is this a commercial for? Well, I think it’s for- Okay, so he’s dressed like a viking. He’s at the gas pump. He’s been told by a pilgrim something that upsets him. So what would a pilgrim tell a viking? I don’t think he’s a viking, I think he’s a trapper. I think he’s an American trapper, ’cause the pilgrims, you know… I think the Pilgrim is saying something about, like… But what would make him mad? And, of course, you can see, like, what year this was based on the cars. It’s just, like, early 2000s. You got that ragtop Caddy back there that he nailed. No, but the price for the gas is $3.39. So it’s made to look old, but that’s not too… I think it’s a commercial for that stuff that you put in your gas tank that gives you better gas mileage. The little thing you just sprinkle in the tank. Like tank-sprinkle? Tank-sprinkle. Viking tank-sprinkle! Sprinkle-tank, STP, sprinkle tank petrol. Yeah. Yeah, I don’t know. I think this is, uh… I don’t know. I bet it’s a credit card ad. Okay, your options are Bisquick- No, that’s not an option, that was just a Bisquick joke. Very good. Snickers, Chex trail mix, or Dunkin’ coffee. Ooh. Well it could be- Dunkin’ wouldn’t be at a gas station. It could be like the Snickers ad, like, “You’re not yourself until you’ve had your Snickers,” but that wouldn’t make any sense for the guy, the Pilgrim to be there. And then what was the other one? Bisquick. Chex, or Snickers, or Dunkin’. Dunkin’. No Bisquick. Something about Dunkin’ and coffee. I bet it’s that gas station coffee sucks. I’m going with Dunkin’, too. We’ll see. Hey guys, they were out of Snickers. No! But, uh, I got these Snickers dark bars with dark chocolate instead. Yay! How did they… Feast. How did they get Chris Sullivan to throw that so far? So we’ve Googled every phrase, and there’s nothing confirming Oh, you know what? That Chris Sullivan is- It’s not Chris Sullivan, It’s that guy that stormed the capital. That’s who it is. He was an actor. Oh, man! He was an actor before. He went way to the right. Snickers, huh? That’s a good commercial, Snickers! That’s the Snickers darkness. What was it called? Darkness? Snickers darkness! Okay, let’s see another one, ’cause I like this game. Oh. Is that stop motion? That’s all we get, huh? The people in the background are real. What do you mean people in the background? There’s people in the background. Play it again? Watch the people in the background move. They’re like, that’s normal people. Yeah. And then you’ve got, like, a stop-motion animation sort of person that wants to get in the water, like a fish that’s caught on the dock. Fish outta water. So it’s like you’re the fish outta water, classic sort of trope. What situation would you feel like a fish outta water? “Don’t be a fish outta water, get this new pair of sunglasses.” You know, like, what makes you- Fish outta water… What makes you feel less like a fish outta water? Duolingo. That was good! It’s a Duolingo commercial, Stevie. Yeah! Screw the real answer, it is a Duolingo commercial. I need my options. Mountain Dew AMP, Capri Sun Roarin’ Waters, or Swedish Fish. I’ve never seen a Swedish Fish ad. I think this is a Mountain Dew commercial. Roarin’ Waters? Capri Sun Roarin’ Waters. I think it’s Mountain Dew ’cause- Roarin’ Waters! It’s a little bit off-putting, it’s a little bit off-putting commercial, unsettling, and I think Mountain Dew goes there. Yeah, Mountain Dew Darkness. Yeah. I’m going for Roarin’ Waters. I thought you were agreeing. Nope. Okay, let’s see. Oh, you’re right. Here it comes with the Capri Sun. Need water? Capri Sun Roarin’ Waters, with a roaring flavor of fruit. Get your water in a pouch. Respect the pouch. Respect it! What? I mean, I just think that- What was the last thing that happened? He smelled his finger, or he licked his finger? I think he realized he was in a bad commercial. Oh, no. Oh, he shook a hand of a fish. You can’t shake the hand of a fish and get away with it. That was a cute little diving dog. Wasn’t it? They threw too- That was so cute. I like this commercial. They threw too much at this ad. And let me get this straight, Capri Sun makes water? That was water. I think it- No, I think it’s the flavor. There’s probably some kind of fruitiness. No, but it says it- It said “get your water from a pouch.” Get your water from a pouch. I think that they were like, “People are bottling water, let’s bag water.” What is it? All natural ingredients. Moms can keep kids hydrated. Yeah, no, it’s fruit-flavored water. Yeah, it’s a lie. It’s fruit-flavored water. That’s interesting. All right. Wait, I liked that commercial! It’s very memorable. Yeah, yeah, I’ll never forget that. Yeah! I’m gonna get some Roarin’ Waters. There’s so many, like, nonsensical like, you know, who are the people that did nonsensical really well? Old Spice. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Taste the rainbow. Skittles did it very well. Old Spice kind of started the… Yeah, but that wasn’t nonsensical, That was… I’m on a horse. I mean, it was like, “manly men” kind of thing, but it was definitely getting into, like… But that was more about the writing than the- So many people have tried to copy that style. But a lot of this is more like, scratch-your-head kind of “I don’t know what’s going on here.” That was a different genre. Yeah, I agree with that. Than, like, something that’s more like Old Spice. So, I don’t know. I think that was… You think it’s trying too hard? I think that that’s had its moment. Okay, you know what hasn’t had its moment and needs to have a moment in your bedroom? Oh yeah. We wanna be in your bedroom when the lights turn out. Look at this. Hit the lights, everybody. Everybody? It takes everybody to hit the lights here? Whoo! Look at that, yes! It is the official Good Mythical Morning neon sign nightlight! Available only at Walmart and walmart.com while supplies last. A couple of y’all have seen this thing out in the wild and snagged it, but we wanted to wait until it was everywhere before we started talking about it. So go get one at Walmart! It’s exclusively at Walmart and walmart.com while supplies last. Hear that? Bells. School’s out! 400 yards. 300 yards. 100 yards- Katy Perry. Run! This is intense! They got Johnson! So Katy Perry in a “Predator” made-for-TV ad. Now they… What are they… Are they playing battleship at that one part? What? Battleship in the jungle? No, like when it goes to the tracker, it made me think about the electronic version of battleship. School’s out. School’s out! 300 yards. Right there. School’s out! School’s out. School’s out, and then what do they do? They’re seeing some incoming… Keep playing it. 100 yards, it’s hungry, sir! Run! Okay, it’s- Okay, I got it. I know what this is. So this is an after-school snack. This is a hungry kid that wants some string cheese or something. String cheese? I think maybe Go-Gurt. No, Go-Gurt is not an after-school thing. Have you ever had it after school? No. It just slides right down. You can get it all in one slurp if you’re hungry enough. I mean, you’re the one who would come home and just eat. I was the one who came home and took a nap. Yeah, I didn’t do that, I ate. Yeah. All the time that you were eating after-school snacks, I was taking an after-school nap. I could get two Go-Gurts down at the same time, if I was hungry. You could double Go-Gurt? You got two hands. I think this is a- There’s gonna be a kid who’s double-fisting Go-Gurt. All right, so I’m gonna go with Rhett’s gut here and I’m gonna say string cheese. Okay, so you don’t want any options? Maybe if the Go-Gurt isn’t one of them, I should get in some options. Go-Gurt is a really good guess. Thank you. It is not Go-Gurt. It is not string cheese. What about his other guess that I stole? It is not string cheese either. String cheese isn’t crazy enough. But you’re in the right territory. The options are Fruit by the Foot, Sour Patch Kids, or Chef Boyardee. Fruit by the Foot. Uh… I don’t think Chef Boyardee would be marketing themselves as an after-school snack. Yeah, Fruit by the Foot, ’cause it’s already a crazy concept. So some hungry kid… By the way, you shouldn’t be satisfying your hunger with Fruit by the Foot. Or… Chef Boyardee is almost acceptable. All right, I’m gonna go with Chef Boyardee. Let us see. That’s a lot of kudzu. Hear that? School’s out. School’s out. 400 yards. 300 yards. It’s a hungry kid coming. It’s hungry, sir! Run! Oh! It got Johnson! Oh, it got Johnson. Oh, Chef Boyardee! Mm, beefy. Oh, gosh! He ate a beefy Johnson! Oh, gosh! “Feed the need.” I don’t think we would do this kind of commercial today. You know? Did he say, “I ate Johnson?” Is that what he said? He didn’t say that. He said he got Johnson. “He’s got Johnson!” Chef Boyardee does make sense because it is the only thing that was listed that is, like, acceptable. Like, you’re hungry and you get home from school. Yeah, it’s like a latchkey type thing, you know? And I should know. ‘Cause I was a latchkey child. Did you have a lot of Chef Boyardee? For a little while, they released Chef Boyardee that was in… They had, like, half a can. Put it in the microwave. Half a can. Oh, you’re talking about the ones that are like- A bowl, basically. A bowl and it was microwa- Yeah. Did you ever get Johnson? I never got Johnson. I have… I have Johnson. I have Johnson, I don’t eat it. I got a pant- Nevermind. Okay, um… Nevermind. We wanna remind you, tomorrow, is it tomorrow? Tomorrow’s the last day that you can submit, you can offer up something special to go in the slot that Greg’s bass guitar has left empty. Maybe you’re the bassist for Alabama and you’re on the fence of if you wanna be a part of this or not. Well, I think you should. Or maybe you’re just somebody else who is a dedicated fan and you wanna see something from your life hanging here permanently, so you want to give it to us. People are saying, “Well, you know, why don’t they buy it?” This is for fun! It’s just like, “Why don’t they just put something there that they wanna… They could afford anything they want. Why are they taking something from a fan?” Why don’t you just keep those comments inside your head? ‘Cause this is fun, you know? Just be just because you think it, doesn’t mean you actually have to go through with saying it. We’re doing something fun, all of a sudden, now Rhett’s angry. Plug it in and enjoy the cozy glow of GMM every night. Get the Good Mythical Morning neon sign nightlight while supplies last, exclusively at Walmart and walmart.com.