Welcome to Good Mythical More. If you had choices put before you of the tastiest items. I know where you’re going with this. To assemble. Yeah. What? _ I know where you’re going with this. Breakfast sandwiches. Yep. Yeah, I’d do it. What would you assemble? I don’t know, but I’d do it. And who would taste it? Jordan. And who would you compete against? You. To see if you made the better one? The better. The better one. That’s what we’re gonna do. But first we’re gonna define… Eellogofusciouhipoppokunurious. That is the longest word… Eellogofusciouhipoppokunurious. I mean, that word is longer than a definition of a word needs to be. Wow. I’m so interested in what this might mean. Eellogofuscious… Fuchsia is in there. Fusciouhipoppokunurious. This is the state in which you are trying to figure out if a hippopotamus is fuchsia, or if they just had ‘ellogs for breakfast. That’s exactly what I was thinking. Oh, very good. Very fine. What a dumb word. This is so dumb. Like how does this happen? It’s not real. How does this happen? Its not real. How does it happen? This is an internet joke. Go fusch yourself, is what I say to whoever says that’s a word. Come on in, Jordan! Jordan Myrick. Hello! Professional food taster. I’m here. Tasting all types of food, putting us to shame. That’s true. That’s true. How you been? I’ve been great, honestly. Oh really? Yeah. Okay. I’m glad you’re not even having to lie about it. Yeah. No. Did you hear something? No, it was just… Oh. I can tell you really meant it. Oh yeah. I’m feeling… Yeah, yeah. You’re not lying about being fine. I wonder why. Why are you doing so great? Is it me or is it Rhett? It doesn’t have to be us. Is it somebody else? It could just be stuff in Jordan’s life. Yeah. Could it be your non-work life? Yeah. You don’t have a life outside of this work, do you? No. No. Not at all I just work here. I don’t. So I know. Well, are you ready for a breakfast sandwich? I’m ready. I’m excited. Okay. Well, Link… It’s the most important meal in the morning. That’s true. I won last time. Link, you’re gonna go first. We decided to simplify it and go back to the, just pick every other one. It’s more fun. I feel like I’m the source of the snake draft, ’cause I was trying to be, like, super fair, like the NBA all-star draft, but we just forgot whose turn it was last time. I know. I never really understood it, to be honest. And I’m a basketball fan. Yeah. So let’s just go back and forth forth. Who’s your team? Me? The Brooklyn Mets in the NBA, and the Sparks in the WNBA. Oh, wow. Okay. All right. All right. All right. It only takes a spark to make a… What’s the camp song? I don’t know. To get a fire going. To get a fire going. I love that. Yeah, yeah. I didn’t go to camp. So, I’m learning. You missed out. I just went to, like, theater day camp while my parents worked. Thanks for sharing. They just drops you off. Let’s get to. Yeah. So Link, you go first. Muffin, biscuit, waffle. Is that all the breads? Those are all the breads. Which means that one person is gonna be stuck with two breads. So let’s just go ahead and state that up top. I could use crunchy dill pickles as a bread. That’s true. I’ll say the breads are one’s the best, one’s the middle, and one’s the worst. In terms of, like, what they are. How could biscuit not be the best? I’ve got a belly full of biscuit. And I definitely have to go with that. So… Biscuit is the best. So I’m gonna take the biscuit and there it is. Oh, I love a biscuit. There it is. Interesting. Interesting, interesting. Right there. And now you’re gonna go. ‘Cause it’s funner that way. I’m also doing pretty good. Really, why? I’m not being honest. Okay. Do you wanna talk? No, I just… Just wanted to see what it would feel like to go a different direction. Sure. You’re having a hard time? No, I’m actually doing good. Oh, okay. I’m actually… but you’re lying. So… No, I wanted to see what it would feel like to say I was lying. But she caught me. I’m gonna go with eggs. I’m gonna go with a fried egg. Oh, I love a fried egg. Yum. I said I was… Uh-huh. So what are you doing about your breads? Well, we’ll figure that out later. It’s a pretty smart strategy because it’s not like you’re gonna pick another bread. Right. Is there a scrambled egg of some sort up here? There’s an egg substitute. There is. Oh, an egg substitute. There’s a vegan egg substitute. But it… Oh my goodness! Turkey bacon’s falling. Well, this stuff looks like it would scramble up pretty nicely. I mean, there’s a reason why it’s up here. It’s because… It’s good. But you should not have picked that next. I didn’t pick it. What?! Oh, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. Whoa. You, oh… I’m holding it closer to the camera. Stevie? Hold on. You can’t bring it up and then have Jordan say, you should not have picked that, and say, I didn’t pick it. This is not how the game works. You took it off the board. Jordan. Come on. In chess, if you touch the piece, it’s a move. Why did you say I shouldn’t have picked it? But you touched it and you moved… But you also said this could be pretty good, I think, is what you also said as you grabbed it. You can’t go back on that. And then you held it. I was just wanting to show it to you. Well, there it is. I’m fine with it. And then I was thinking to myself, and then I said to Carney, hey, that good strategy that Jordan and Rhett were just talking about, Link didn’t hear. I’m not about strategy. Well, I’m about… This is good, though. We did really like this. I’m about bacon. Okay. What about my heart? Delicious. Delicious bacon. Oh gosh. Well, I think I’m, I guess I’m going… You’re doing all right, Link. I’m going healthy here. I do have real… Do it, yeah. Do something different. Real eggs and real bacon, though. Yours feels very classic. So this is an opportunity… I will say that I’ve started off pretty strong. You could do something different. Something avant-garde. Did not necessarily expect this. And I’m not gonna pull ’em off to show them to people. We’ve never done that. So that’s good to not start now. No showing. No showing. No showing. No showing. No showing. It didn’t feel right when it did it. Peanut butter? Where does peanut butter gonna fall on this? On one of these sandwiches. On somebody’s. Yeah. I’m thinking… That’s the best part about this whole game. The butterball sausage patty. I think I have to go here because what’s gonna happen is you’ve taken bacon and I need something. Yeah, that’s… ‘Cause I know you don’t prefer these eggs. That was your only call, was to go sausage. I think. At this point. I mean, that’s what I would do. But… So tell me about this sausage pick. It’s delicious. This is the Sporked sausage pick. Yeah. We love it. It’s juicy. It’s flavorful. It’s the perfect size to go on a biscuit. It’s great. Oh, and it’s… I can smell it from here, too. It’s Turkey sausage. It is. Yeah. We’re big Turkey sausage fans at Sporked. 50% Less fat. Okay. So it’s still healthy. Okay. I’m gonna start assembling this Okay. I’m not. You are doing everything different today. Yeah, I know. It’s gonna get really weird in a couple of rounds. I’m trying not to touch your stuff. You can touch it. I don’t care. It’s fine. These eggs look decent. They’re nice. They’re good. It was bad strategy, but a good product. If you don’t want an actual egg, this is a good egg to get. Absolutely. Is what you’re saying. Yeah. Jordan, we have three cheese products up here. Yeah. I mean, basically it feels like between American cheese, habanero, cheddar cheese, and pimento cheese. All of these would be good. I’m gonna go with a little flare. Which one’s my favorite? We have pretty similar tastes, so I’m actually gonna go with the pimento cheese. Good! Because I love pimento cheese. I love pimento cheese, too. In fact, I had a day when I was back in North Carolina. Mm. I had pimento cheese for breakfast and for lunch. I love that. ‘Cause they’ll put pimento cheese on, like, a chicken sandwich. Yeah. I had it on a breakfast sandwich and then I had it on a hot dog. I love that. Did you go to Pinky’s? Hot dog? No, it was in North Carolina. Okay. Yeah, Pinky’s is in North Carolina. Is there a Pinky’s in North Carolina? It’s a restaurant that puts pimento cheese on hotdogs. You’ve been to North Carolina? Yeah. What, is that in Raleigh? I think so? I was in the country. But now… I was way out in the country. I think it’s in North Carolina. Now I’m scared it’s in South Carolina and the fans are gonna be really mad at me. South Carolina. We all oughta be so lucky. It’s in one of the Carolinas. It’s good. Go. It’s beautiful down there. This is a, I’ve had… They have palm trees. When I made my smash burgers at home, I grilled some smash burgers, I bought this cheese and I feel very validated and vindicated that it is a Sporked pick, as well. I mean, I was tempted by the packaging, by the classic Kraft. Tempted by Kraft. American slice. But then it really came through, didn’t it? It’s delicious. It’s so much better than the regular Kraft. And it’s easily the best American cheese out there. So good. I love it. So good. I don’t think you can have too much cheese. And I like pimento cheese, but I feel like a dash of wickedly habanero cheddar cheese to spice things up, to go double cheese. I love that. No one’s gonna complain about that. Double cheese? Not me. Is it Pinky’s West Side Grill? Yeah! One’s in Charlotte and one’s in Huntersville. Huntersville? Where’s that? I don’t know. Okay, so I was right. Yeah, it’s in North Carolina. I want you to handle your cheese. I don’t want to do it. I come here to not work for like 30 minutes a week. This is Jordan’s break! This is my time off. But I’m gonna be doing so much cheese stuff. Here. Wipe your fingers with a wipe. Use a knife. And then touch the cheese. Okay. Yeah. Yeah. It’s okay. I mean, it’s not that I didn’t want to do it for you. I know. No, I know. I know you’re trying to be sweet, and I love that. I’m learnable. I know. I’m gonna taste this. That’s my favorite thing about you. And I’ve obliterated this piece. No, looks good. What has happened to the cheese? This is not a representation of the cheese. I just wanna be clear about that. This is a representation of the cheese if it was stuck to a plate. Yeah. For a while. It wants to melt so bad. Which is a good thing. Yeah. Yeah, yeah. Yeah. We’re, yeah. What’s happening right now looks gross. It’s fun until it isn’t, right? I told you. I told you it would I know. I should have listened. I’m sorry. Your sandwich is so yellow right now. All right. Is it your turn? Whose turn is it? It’s my turn. It’s Link’s turn, ’cause I just got the double cheese. Right, right, right. Okay, let’s get rid of this. Again, it’s about to get weird. You know, there is a thing that happens, and it’s called putting strawberry jam on your sausage biscuit. Yep. Sure. I’ve heard about this. I can do that. I’ve heard about this. You can. I am gonna do that. Tell me about the strawberry spread. What is this, specifically? So it’s strawberry spread. Like you said. It’s a hundred percent fruit. It just tastes really nice. It’s not artificial tasting. It’s not chemically. Is that why it’s called spread? Because… I don’t think it’s a jam or a jelly, technically. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I think it’s a spread because it’s all fruit. Sweetened only with vineyard-ripened grape and fruit juices. Uh-huh. I guess. I don’t know. But it’s good! Taste it! I am gonna taste it. Hmm. It’s nice, right? Got a little seed in there. It’s actually not too sweet. That’s what we liked about it. No cane sugars, no corn syrup. No cane sugars. A hundred percent from fruit. And then I’m gonna do a little spread. Yeah. ’cause even with the cheese, even with the egg, even with the… Because of that sausage, you can get away with having a nice jam. I can get into it. I like it. Yeah. This is not a bad thing. Of course, what are we gonna do next? I know. I’m getting scared. There’s one thing I really don’t want you to get. Okay. This is about strategy at this point, okay? Yes. This is about where we’re headed, not where we’re at. I know. Okay? You play with a lot of strategy and I respect that. You’ve already got real bacon. When you’re heartless, you gotta go somewhere. You’ve already got real bacon, which is going to do a lot of heavy lifting. Yeah. And again, you’ve already got two types of cheese. I’m gonna do a double cheese, double bacon, because I know that you like Turkey sausage, and I’m gonna do a little Turkey bacon. Good gosh. That’s gonna just be a complimentary thing to the regular bacon, okay? Wow. Okay. This is not my first choice. This is about creating difficult situations for Link in the future. Okay? I like that. So if you have to make the sad choice to get Turkey bacon, that’s the best Turkey bacon to get. Yes. This is the, what is it? Jenny O’s? Jenny O’s. Yeah. We loved it. We loved the texture, the taste. It’s nice and meaty, but it also crisps up a little. Scary looking though. And I think it’ll blend well. Hold it up. It’ll blend well with the real bacon. Oh. You see, it slides right off the plate. Unlike Link’s cheese. Exactly. Wow. Sriracha or pickles. Pickles? Now that I’ve gone with jam, I’m really scared to go with pickles. Okay. I don’t think that’s gonna work. There’s so much bread left out. There’s so much bread. Yeah. You’re both gonna have to, someone’s gonna have to do like Big Mac style. And I don’t have any bread. Piece of… Oh, wait! Oh yeah. You have no bread. Wow. Incredible strategy. Which is why I’m definitely taking your waffles. Okay. Because I don’t want you doing a waffle sandwich, which she would love. Everybody would love it. Okay. You know what? You would love it. That’s a great move. That’s a great note. Great move. Sprouts. You’ve stuck me with a muffin. And you’re right, because now I need to put something, unless I’m just gonna do one. Wow. Unless I’m doing like a double down situation, and I don’t have bread. Why would you say that out loud? That’s why I was hoping this would all culminate in, one of you having three breads. Let’s see. I hope that doesn’t happen. Let’s see, let’s see, let’s see. It’s gonna come down to something very interesting here. Okay. I can never see the thing behind me, so it’s always kind of scary to see Crunchy pickles, sriracha, peanut butter. Vegan bacon. Let’s make it make sense. Right? There’s one that… there’s one that everyone should be going for next. Because it makes the most sense. It makes the most sense? What I would do next is I would choose… The problem is, is what’s the next choice? Because I know what my current choice is, but what’s my next choice? Because… You’re thinking ahead? Yeah. I’ve kind of been doing that the whole time. So, okay. There’s 1, 2, 3, 4, 5. Five things left, right? Yeah. And I’m going now. And so I’m gonna have to get two of these things. And Link’s gonna get three of them, right? No, no. I’m gonna get three and he’s gonna get two. Mm-hm. So that’s my problem. Okay. Because I know if I, well, I don’t think it really matters, ’cause I’m gonna be stuck with one of the things that I don’t want. So I’m gonna get sriracha right now. Great. Okay. Perfect. Yeah. Sriracha. That’s the choice that I would have made. Delicious. Look at this stuff. Yellow Bird, huh? Delicious. They make this stuff with dates. A little lime. It’s, like, fruity and spicy and salty. It’s really good. Whoa. Yeah. So it’s surprising, huh? That’s better than the rooster sauce. Can I give Link a little? Yeah. Oh, thank you. That’s it. It’s actually not as hot. It’s not that hot. As the rooster sauce. You’ll be okay. That’s good enough. It’s nice. This is all so nice right now. This is fruitier. You’re right. I do like it. Yeah. Wish I could take from around. Okay. This is me, huh? Yes. I mean, pickles are gonna work on this. Vegan bacon. I kind of want you to have all the bacon. Interesting. Stop telling him things. It would be cool if he had all the bacon. So I want the pickles. I don’t think pickles are gonna be bad on this. Okay. I’m into it. I like these pickles. They come in little packs so they’re easy to eat in the car. Oh, snap! Oh snap. That’s a good name for a pickle. Cute. Right? Fresh dill pickle snacking cuts. No brine added. Potential outcomes here. Just so we can kind of go through this. Okay? If I pick the vegan bacon, and now I’ve got a three bacon meal or sandwich. Bacon three ways. Link has to make the choice if he’s gonna be three breads. Or peanut butter. I think I have to present that choice to him. I think I have to present that choice to him. So I’m going three bacons. Yeah, man! Way to go, dude! Are you gonna stick me with no bread or stick yourself with all the bread? Peanut butter is not gonna work with this. As much as I love peanut butter. I might need peanut butter to assemble this. I’m a three bread man. I’m fine with that. Okay! I got no bread. This one’s the worst for me that it’s ever been. Oh no. Okay, so gimme a second. So how am I gonna… Give me a second. Wow. I gotta construct this thing. I’m already thinking about how to eat this. It’s gonna be messy. Mine’s a fork dish. Okay. I don’t have to eat it with my hands. I still want mine a be a biscuit. Stevie. You know what, you you decide what you’re comfortable with and then that’s what you should do. I guess for me, I’m just like, you eat a sandwich with your hands. Yep. So the bottom is gonna be this vegan bacon, because it feels like it’s gonna be one of the least greasy ones. Okay. I love that. That’s a very thoughtful choice. And my bottom is gonna be a biscuit. ‘Cause in the end, this is still a biscuit. Okay, so yours is a biscuit sandwich first and foremost. Yeah. With… Ooh. A bigger… I think I have to do a bacon weave. I love that. Yeah, that makes sense. I actually have a technical question. So Link doesn’t have to use all of the bread, right? No. I think just one slice of each counts. One of each. Okay. I don’t know how to braid. That’s beautiful. That looks really nice. I think I’ve done this wrong. Okay. I need to start with the waffle. Do it again. And don’t forget that this biscuit’s the one with the jam on it. So you have to use it or you’re disqualified. Yep. And that’s going on the top. Okay. You’re right now. And then the, what’s that called? A weird bread. English muffin. An English muffin. English muffin. That, okay. So then that’s going there. Much more structurally sound. And then I gotta put more pickles up here. Wow. Just wanna pickle it up. And then… He went from not wanting to touch Jordan’s food to, like, touching every… Yes. Every part. Absolutely. Well, they told me to do that and I cleaned my fingers. I’m fine with that. Yeah, I love that. And then look, now it’s a nice pyramid. You did a really good job with that. It’s a nice pyramid. I’m proud of you. You know what would be nice? Some bread. Wow. Some bread would be real nice about right now. You’ve played yourself! I feel like the more we’ve done this, Rhett has gotten more into strategy and Link is descending more into madness. Yeah. I think that’s beautiful. You wanna see something beautiful? Look at that. Okay. Do I eat it? Is it now? I call this the three bread breakfast for Jordan. I love that. I would definitely order that at a restaurant. Yes? And did you get sausage? Maybe… Mm-mm. Maybe yank some sausage. I didn’t get any sausage. Maybe yank some sausage out. Oh gosh. Okay. What do you get? I think the pickles may be the problem, but. I actually would argue that the pickles are the solution. Great. I think the pickles with the jam? Exceptional. Wow. Sweet. A little tart, salty, sugary. The egg is a nice base. The cheese doesn’t give too much flavor, but provides a lot of texture. And to be honest, I only taste one bread and that’s biscuit, which is how I want it. Okay. Wow, nice. And you forgot about what type of egg it was. Yeah. No, I didn’t even think about it. Didn’t even think about it. Okay. It’s good. You should try it, honestly. It really works. I’m gonna do something real special right here. That was a mistake, ’cause now you’re looking at that ugly bacon. That bacon is what is gonna keep their hands from getting… Did you make a bacon taco? Yes. Okay. Hold my hair. Okay. Oh, it’s actually much more structurally sound than I thought it would be. Bite wherever you want. Are you drunk right now? What… That’s what it feels like. Wow. You’re high school drunk. Is it everything you wanted it to be? It’s so good. Hey. Woo! Until I get to the peanut butter. Oh no! I just did a little bit, ’cause I know peanut butter goes so far. But I didn’t want to, I wanted to be fair. I didn’t wanna just do nothing. You know? It’s not bad. It’s really interesting. The pimento cheese with the habanero cheese. Incredible. You tried. Interesting. Like I love the melty egg or the runny egg. All three bacons blend beautifully. The peanut butter is so strong. I really would like for both of you to test your creations, or maybe each other’s creations. Oh I ate mine. I liked it. Oh, good. Okay. I’m not eating his. I want to try it. I want to try it. I was really happy with mine. Are you good with your hair? Please hold it. Okay, wait. Hold on, hold on. I have peanut butter in my hands and I don’t wanna get fired for getting peanut butter in your hair. Lemme take this opportunity to tell you to, when this is over, head on over to Sporked.com. They’ve ranked the best breakfast sandwiches and breakfast burritos from the frozen section. When you don’t want to go through all this trouble, go over there, find out the best frozen breakfast sandwich and burritos. Sporked.com, all right? The peanut butter is the part that I don’t like, but I don’t know. My bite wasn’t as overwhelming. Bacon three ways? As it seemed like it was for you. Much better than I thought it was gonna be, though. Both of these are much better than I thought they would be. But in the end, the winner is Link. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Three bread man. Why did you seem like you didn’t wanna say that? I wanted to say it, but you just looked so happy and confident. Yeah. Yeah, yeah. I don’t know. I’m excited for you. I’m proud of it. I mean there’s, yeah, it really came together. It’s nice. Wow, that cheese is good. Is that legitimate or are you still lying about how you feel? Me? Yeah. I don’t know. This is scary to me. My real dad’s not that honest about his feelings, so I need my work dad to be. I’m happy right now. Thank goodness. Head over to Sporked for rankings of the best frozen breakfast sandwiches and frozen breakfast burritos, because mornings are hard and these will make them easier.