I’m Atsuko Okatsuka, and this is my last meal. [heavy metal intro music] Every person has exactly two things in common. We all gotta eat and we’re all gonna die. Today’s guest is a standup comedian and viral dance innovator whose new special Father is out now on Hulu. She’s a former member of the elite acapella force, known as the Cold Stone Creamery team. Atsuko Okatsuka, welcome to the show. Wow. Thank you so much. Thank you, Josh. That was the. You know about my Coldstone days? I am very familiar with your Coldstone days. I never got to see a performance in person. Ugh. But I am very curious what your favorite song was to sing when you received a single dollar tip. Uh, will you tip me? What? Yeah, just pretend. Pretend you pretend to tip me in the cup. Okay. Oh my God. This German chocolate cake folded is so delicious. Here’s the tip for $1. Oh, thank you, we got a tip. We got a tip. Another one. [silly copyright free music] And usually like one person, there was this one kid I worked with. Mm-hmm. Who loved the singing part. And he would always like go all out Cold Stone. when at Cold Stone, like we were on Broadway. He would do a spin and then, so that was, that was the part I was playing. Did any of that like sincerely prepare you for potentially bombing and standup comedy? Because I feel like your soul exits your body at cold stones. Sweetie, I don’t bomb. Stand up. No, no. But that did, uh, you know, train me for, I guess like performing anything goes. Mm-hmm. The improv part. When was the last time, uh, you went to a Cold Stone? Uh, probably in the last couple years, but I did, my high school girlfriend worked at a cold stone, and so we used to walk in there and we used to kind of just keep putting $1 in every 10 minutes to embarrass everybody. Wow. And you were like, oh, ha ha. Sing again. Yeah I now see. Ursula Ursula sing, sing to me. Did you have a seashell out? You’re like ahhhhh! I did. Is that you? I did actually. I brought the sea shell and I said went ahhh. It’s because of instances like that. Mm-hmm. That they actually, um, have stopped the singing. Have they? Really? Yeah. If you go to Coldstone now, it’s not a requirement anymore. Because I think they finally understood, you know, like human cruelty. Geneva conventions, sort of. Abuse, things like this. Yeah. Have you thought about your last meal before? I’ve never actually. I think the, the idea of it is, is so sad. I get too sad. Do you generally try and like avoid sad topics? Like is that something that you try and actually not think about in life? Yeah. Could you tell? No, but I think one of the things I love about your comedy is that you do talk about big sad topics, but you do it in such a bright way. Yeah. So I kind of can’t tell which angle you’re coming at it for. Right, right. You know, I wear bright clothes. Mm-hmm. Right. And like food, jewelry, I want everyone else to feel good. Right. Like, ’cause what you wear for most of the day, you can’t see it. Hmm. It’s for other people. Yeah. Really. Right. And so I wear bright colors and like bold prints and stuff, knowing that. Mm-hmm. And it’s kind of why I do comedy too. I want other people to feel seen. Yeah. And feel good. Well, how often do you think about death in general? I think I know the answer, but I don’t think about my own death. Oh, interesting. Yeah. Has that always been the case, or was there a time when you like decided I’m not gonna ponder my own mortality. I just don’t think about it. I, and you’ll see if you we’re kind of confined to a table. Yeah. Yeah. But if you saw me in the streets, you’d be like, wow, this [bleep] does not care about dying. ’cause this girl, ’cause you know, I’m just like, ha ha ha. The other day. Mm-hmm. Okay. I was doing a comedy show at West Side Comedy Club and so it’s like behind Third Street Promenade. Mm-hmm. So it’s like you pass alleyways to get to this comedy club. I’m walking to the show, right? And then from the darkness, I hear a man go, Hey. And I go, hello? And I hug him. I hug him, and uh, and then I see, says he goes, hi. And I was like, oh my God, I don’t know this man. I was like, I don’t know you. I, I just thought, I was like, I thought maybe you were a comedian I knew, you know what I mean? Yeah. So I do things like that. I’m always like on the verge of going missing. Yeah. And so I, yeah, you’ll. Like, you’ll see that I, I don’t think about, you know, what’ll happen to me as much as I obsess about what’ll happen to other people. Mm-hmm. To you to, I don’t know, my mom and grandma to your crew here. Yeah. I think that’s genuinely a really beautiful way to kind of waltz through life. It’s like you’re dancing through life as people are just shooting bows and arrows at you and constantly dodging them, you know, against your, uh, best efforts. Yeah. Who’s that? Like Snow White. Like Snow white. Kind of. Yeah. Well one time something did get her. Yeah. Um, and you know, it was hunger. Well, hey, I think we got the cure for that today. Hey, thank you so much. We can transitition. For that segue. Let’s go. You ready to eat your last meal? Let’s do it. Let’s do it. Yeah. Atsuko, for the first course of your final meal, we have the oyster vermicelli Taiwanese. Style. We made an oyster broth and cooked the noodles. Added that in there, a little bit of black vinegar and some cilantro on top. And then in the steamer basket we have the lotus leaf wrapped sticky rice with a filling of pork and soy and some extra black vinegar if you’d like. Wow. Yes. Thank you. Thank you, Chefs. Yes, home. I have actually never had this dish before, so none of us had, so we had to like try and find it around LA and then figure out how. to recreate it, but please let me know how it is. Oh my gosh. So did you just find like a Taiwanese grandma in the street and you’re like, Hey, can we go to your house? Mm-hmm. You’ll not imagine the casting process for that. You know, my grandma is available. We should have called her. It might have been, we were just walking in Arcadia. Yeah. And then we found, I don’t think it was her. People have actually bumped into like, have dmed me or like tagged me and been like, met your grandma today in Arcadia. Okay. They send me the picture. It’s not my grandma. It’s not her. It’s just another Asian grandma that they took a picture with, like at H Mart or like in the street. That probably made that Asian grandma or just old woman feel very special though. You know? Or scared. Or scared. Yeah. I was like, don’t do that. Don’t just go what is, and then you know, who knows? Hey, you are Atsuko’s grandma. She’s probably like, yes, leave me be. You know? Anyway, so that, that does happen. That makes sense. Well, please dig in. Let know how it this, okay? Yes. Oh, this is so exciting. We eat these like outdoors sometimes. It’s very like street food. Mm-hmm. These days when I go back to Taiwan, it’s with my husband and he, is not as into this, so it’s like me eating it while he watches. So this is nice. And that’s a good relationship for, for both of you if both are into it, you know? Yeah. Some just like to watch and that’s totally fine. Right. Some people are the watchers, some people are the doers. Yeah. That’s how a threesome goes. There’s the chair in the corner of the hotel room for a reason, you know? Yeah. Sometimes it’s just for a Gatorade break, though. It sounds like we were both the third, we know this all too well. Did you bring your own Gatorade or, or did they supply the Gatorade break? We, we were both the watchers at some point. Yeah. Did you say, did I bring the Gatorade? Yeah. No, you didn’t. I have a Gatorade. I have Gatorade. Zero. For your low calorie needs. Are they sponsoring you currently or you’re just trying to fish for it? Right? No, see, the thing is like, I have this mentality. I think it’s just from childhood or like, you know, maybe not growing up having a lot, uh, always pack a lunch, always pack things and so I know, okay, I know we’re eating this. And then we’re eating the sticky rice, Lotus rice. What’s wild is I, I don’t know why I was like, I, I, I also brought one for lunch. Mm-hmm. How often do you travel with that in your purse? My grandma happened to have a bunch of these and she was like, Hey, you know, if you want to, you know it, it’s kind of like a sandwich. Mm. We could do a compare and contrast. We can, A 24-year-old white kid named Colby made this. Oh, we can compare it against your grandmothers. That’s. Globalization. A hundred percent. That’s, that’s the point. Yeah, that’s the point, right? Are they, I, I don’t know. Bringing, bringing cultures together. See this? That’s this. This is east meets West. It’s never gonna happen before. This is, this is Colby. This is my grandma, right? Yeah. Should we try them? Oh yeah, sure. Yeah. I don’t, yeah, there’s so much to do. It’s like, eat, eat this, eat that. I have my own, so thirsty. Do you– I’m so overwhelmed. It seems like you get kind of overwhelmed with, with clutter. Have you ever thought about not bringing all these things? I have so many things. I have my energy pills. Because I get tired. Atsuko what’s with the energy pills? These are called Alinamin. It’s a Japanese energy pill and these are like vitamin, it’s all, all natural. Yeah, I know it’s bright yellow, but it’s all natural and it really works. When I’m tired before a show or something, I’ll take, I’ll take two. Yeah. You know, it really helps me. Incredible. I, I would feel guilty asking you for some, but like, you can, can I, yeah, yeah. Do, do you wanna try it now? Yeah, that’d be great. Okay. Do you feel tired? Uh, constantly. Okay. Yeah. No, go. Perfect. Go ahead. Do you put it in the soup, or, or no? You, I’ve never tried it that way, but Hey, it might make it go down. You said just two? Yeah. It’s a lot. Let’s see. Let’s do two oh oh oh. I don’t know if you’ll feel a difference ’cause you’re kind of just sitting. But we can go jog around and then, and then I, I’m just gonna, I also have oranges. There’s a whole like separate social media segment called What’s in My Bag. Oh, bye. You are just doing as a fully separate one. That’s so true. ’cause I, I brought multiple bags today. But anyway. Okay. No. So should eat this, right? Eat the soup. Eat the soup. I’m, I am not good at eating and talking at the same, you said you are? Yeah. Yeah. I’m not as, I’m realizing, Like eat real fast and then I’ll talk and real fast. Mm-hmm. And then we can eat real fast again. Oh, it’s so good. That’s actually really delightful. The creaminess of the oysters. With like that vinegariness, um, I’ve been a fan of your comedy ever since I saw you at a backyard show in 2019 in North Hollywood, and you did a bit about charcuterie boards that forever ruined them for me. Oh, wow. Do you have any plans to ruin more foods? For me, what’s wild is I’ve taken back my stance on charcuterie because it’s, um, what’s always in my green room when I perform now. It was so good. That was about how they’re, they’re just sandwiches that have yet to be assembled. And the chef doesn’t even hide them because they’re on the cutting board. Right, right, right. That was a very formative joke to my entire being. Oh wow. It’s been six years and I remember that at the backyard in North Hollywood. Wow. Yeah. I, yeah, I never taped it or anything because I was like, I don’t wanna offend the, the, the charcuterie community. Um. I wanna talk about your new special Father on Hulu. Mm-hmm. Which is out now, and I’ve watched and it’s incredible. How do you look hot while eating and talking? What do you mean? Are you saying I currently look hot while eating and talking? Or are you just asking for general advice? No. Yes. Yes you do. You very put together, but thank you so much. I put lipstick on and stuff. Mm-hmm. Oh, makeup artist and everything. And then you’re like, eat, eat. I’m like, okay. No. When you slurp noodles, uh, Kim Kardashian would actually do this. when would she took selfies, Yeah, because check it out if you like. Yeah. Hitch, I’m right here. Okay. So if you’re kind of angled towards the camera and you mm-hmm. Uhhuh, oh, for the, for the angle, you get the jawline and the cheekbones when you slurp the noodles. So as long as you’re perennially, slurping a noodle, you’re gonna look hot, but then your lips got everything sauce on it. Still a hundred percent. But then that just sort of makes it look glossy. Okay. Sideways tilt, right? Yeah. Like this. Yeah. Yeah. There it’s, but yeah, but that, like constantly Tell me that story. What, oh. Um, I was gonna ask you about your new special, uh, Father. One of my favorite bits in it is when you talk about your cheerleading days in the power of having somebody just scream, I believe in you, whether it’s true or not, and it’s generally not true. Um, have you always had that relentless sense of optimism in your life, or did it take you a while to develop that tone? Oh, I’ve always been very optimistic. But did you have a lot to be optimistic about when that started or was it a reaction to like. Things may seem dire. However, I need to counter that with optimism. Yeah, totally. It’s like the whole wear bright colors, you know? Mm-hmm. Try not to listen to sad lyrics. Yeah. Some people love sad songs. Sad. Like Bon Iver Yeah. Oh my God. So many people love him. Mm-hmm. And he’s, it’s very pretty. I like his songs too, but if you really listen, it’s just a man howling in a cave. I’m not familiar. Is anyone gonna come get him? I’m talking about some of your, your earlier career work. ’cause it, it wasn’t as. bright and jerky and optimistic. You did a trio of super dark, gritty indie films known as the Antelope Valley trilogy. Oh my gosh. Yeah. That you wrote in, starred in and. Yeah. I’m curious if the message that you were trying to convey was different back then, or if it’s the same message that you’re conveying differently with your comedy. Yeah. Rarely do people, you know, bring like my independent filmmaking days up. Yeah. Um, yeah. I was a big fan of Little Rock. Yeah. So I made that with my, my ex. Yeah, my ex was like my film teacher and he was, yeah, I was in community college. Good Start. Uh, toxic, probably, not so great time. Yeah. You know, I was trying to find my voice in comedy, they say it takes like 10 years for you to find that. Yeah. Because you are growing at the same time, right? Sure. At the same time that you wanna be true to yourself, at the same time, your stage persona is a little different than who you are. It’s a heightened version of you. Yeah. You know, and so to find that balance takes a long time. And um, at that time I thought, oh, you know, comedy’s just like a hobby. I’m, you know, it’s not a job. And so I’ll do, like, I’ll have these backup plans, but the backup plans were still the arts. Yeah. That’s not a good backup plan. Like I said, there is like a sadness a little bit to me. Yeah. And so I think maybe in those films, that’s what was being. You know, portrayed. Yeah. Uh, please dig into the, the sticky rice. I need to, I need to let you eat. ’cause I know the talking and the eating. I understand it does get difficult sometimes. Okay. So this one, yeah, this is Colby. This is Colby’s. Do you generally just unwrap this and eat it with your hands, or do you go– Yeah. Fork, chopsticks. Yeah. It’s nice. You wanna, you know, sometimes you open it up on a plate. I feel like the leaf is the plate. It’s a double plate. Kind of like when I wear a hat. Because like my hair’s already like a hat, so it’s like a hat on a hat. But it is real good question because a lot of my drag queen friends have been like, you know, if you ever want to grow your own hair out, I could just do a wig of this bowl cut and then wear it when I perform. I mean, I actually a pretty good way to experiment. Uhhuh. It is like a tamale. I think it was kind of beautiful ’cause every culture kind of independently of each other kind of came up with the same foods. If you take a starch, wrap it in a leaf and fill it with meat, that’s a really fun time. Yeah. I wanna ask you about something that Margaret Cho said to you. Yeah. Where she said, you need to find, what is your essential comedy, right? You said that you found yours is, I didn’t ask to be here, but I am. Why is that inherently funny? Because that really resonated with me. Because it’s true, right? Mm-hmm. And I think it’s a very positive, but also empathetic way of looking at life and yourself. Mm-hmm. Right? It’s like we truly didn’t ask to be here, so. Don’t be so hard on yourself. Right? Yeah. Yeah. So it’s like, okay, I’m sorry I made out with your dog by accident. That, that happened to me. Do you mean my dog or like the royal You your dog. Yeah. He’s been dead for a while. I don’t know if you were back then. I killed him. You killed the dog by making, yeah. What did you have in your mouth? I’m sorry for your loss. Thank you so much. That really means a lot. I made out with, uh, it was a Pomeranian. And I didn’t make out. It was more like, right. So a person was walking their dog. Mm-hmm. And the dog, you know, started licking me in my face and I was mid talking. Oh my God, you’re so cute. So, right. Obviously boom, contact tongue to tongue. Yeah. And, um, I let it. Give me a few more. Sure. You’re sort of there. It’d be almost rude if you. You’re already there. Yeah. Because life is hard. Atsuko, for course number two of your final meal. We, we have a whole Taiwanese hot pot spread, so we have the aromatic bone broth in the pot right now with the fire on. Then we have the head on blue prawns. We actually have some par cooked abalone over there. We have some thin sliced pork belly. We have thin sliced, uh, beef shoulder claude. We have beef meatballs. We have the vermicelli noodles. Then we have the par cooked kobocha squash. We have fried tofu, we have boiled tofu. We have lotus root, we have tarro root, we have chrysanthemum greens, we have Napa cabbage, we have enoki mushrooms, we have shiitake mushrooms, we have shimeji mushrooms. And then we have, uh, finally tofu skin or yuba, as well as, um, a bean curd sauce and a sesame sauce. Wow. And all of this just for 49.95. Come on down to the Mythical Kitchen Hotpot Shack. It’s owned by me and Colby. No, this is so exciting. Where do you typically start with hotpot? Well, whatever. It takes longer to cook. So since you presented, oh yeah. Lotus. It’s lotus. It’s gotta be, gotta be well cooked. Because it’s hard, right? Mm-hmm. Mushroom. Let’s do it. Alright. Do you want help? If, if you’d like, please. I mean, this is your last meal. This is your hot pot. Corn will probably be harder too, right? Corn will be nice once it kind of sits. I stopped doing the charcuterie bit because I was like, wait, I love hot pot. Isn’t hot pot just he Asian charcuterie? Wait, that’s really true. Ever since my husband got diagnosed with celiac, charcuterie– I’m sorry for your loss, by the way. That’s very tough. Oh my gosh. Yeah. No, thank you. We didn’t even know what it was like we, we were like, oh, so just like, don’t eat it. That much. And they’re like, no, no, you can’t eat it at all. Right? We’re like, what? They were like, it’s an autoimmune disease. We, we had no idea. So we’re having to learn quickly. And so charcuterie has been very helpful ’cause it’s like protein. Mm. And you know, cheese and, and same with hot pot too, actually. Yeah. Yeah. Did, did you find out about his celiac diagnosis after you’d already written the joke? I don’t wanna lose my husband to a sandwich. Yeah. Isn’t that wild? Did you manifest that? Did you put that out into the world? I don’t want to. I don’t want to. I don’t wanna do that. It feels like it. It does feel like it a little bit. He mentioned it to me. He was like, wait. Yeah. Remember when you were like, I don’t wanna lose my white husband to a sandwich and he’s, what if you made that come true? I was like, oh, I’ll try to say statements opposite to it. Then I should have said something better like we’re, when we’re trillionaires or whatever. I wanted to ask you about a documentary that you made about your mom and grandma on a YouTube channel about nine years ago. There’s a scene where, I know you don’t like to think about death, but your grandmother talks about what happens when she passes away and who takes care of your mom. Right. And I’m wondering where that sense of duty to take care of your family comes from. I watched my mom like suffer growing up and she still does. You know, my mom has schizophrenia and other you know things because of it too. Yeah. She has severe depression, OCD. Right. And then, you know, physical ailments. ’cause she hasn’t left the house in a long time. Mm-hmm. You know, she’s just so depressed. She doesn’t even move. Still to this day, she has no friends. You know. So I think that’s why like the, the want for other people to do well, the fear for other people to die, things like that. That, that’s where that comes from. Yeah. Yeah. I tend to think people are sadder than they actually are. Do you think that’s an inflated sense of self for yourself? Or like a deflated sense of happiness for other people? I don’t think I’ve ever heard anybody describe it that way. Yeah. It’s like both, right? It’s like, oh, like, because if I ever see a person eating alone, for example, I’ll like offer to sit next to them. Hmm. And they say no. Sure. Um. But like that does happen sometimes because I immediately think, oh, they just lost their spouse or something. You know what I mean? Mm-hmm. Sad like that for the most part, I think. I don’t know, because my mom is sad a lot, so I think, oh, maybe other people are too. Yeah. Yeah. And then, you know, they’ll go, I’m not sad, but I’m already like sitting next to them. Yeah. So my mom was also schizophrenic. Is that right? So never formally diagnosed as either schizophrenia or heavy, heavy bipolar, but like hallucinations, delusions of grandeur. Wow. And ever, basically, ever since I can remember her. And why didn’t you start on that? I thought about it, but we were having a nice time eating hot pot. Right. And talking about cold stone. Ha ha. Like, oh, Cold Stone, you’re at Cold Stone. My mom has schizophrenia, right? Yeah. It’s all linked. Like genuinely. Genuinely though, I do believe all this is, is linked. ’cause I’ve noticed that especially having a schizophrenic mom from a formative age, you kind of end up with really weird views about the world. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. And I know mine is like, I won’t suffer the idea of objective truth because for me, my mom had all these delusions and hallucinations and she was the only person I communicated with when I was like six, seven years old. Mm-hmm. So I’d be like, maybe she is the governor of California. I, I don’t know. Right. ’cause I’m a child. And then you sort of grow older and start to realize, oh, this is what’s happening. It’s a mental illness. Um, but even now, anybody tells me anything. I simply think that could either be true or it could not be true. And in a way it doesn’t really matter because here we are in this situation and it’s really informed the way that I live my life. But I love that you seem to have that with like, everybody’s sad and suffering and I’m Atsuko and I’m here to brighten everyone’s day. Oh, well, you know, I, I had a grandma too who helped, who raised me. Mm-hmm. Without her, I’d be, I don’t know what I would be. Yeah. Yeah. Maybe just like my mom, who knows, right? Mm-hmm. And so I feel lucky, right? Mm-hmm. I feel like I’m luckier than most. Yeah. Or you know, it could have been worse, right? Sure. So I do think that way. Yeah. There’s another part in your new special where you kind of create a new way to measure one’s life, which is that if Ira Glass calls you right and says you’re an inspiration, you know, something has gone horribly wrong. Yeah, and you had that happen and that was to sort of figure out the story of what actually happened with your grandmother. What did you find out in that? So, yeah, I found out my grandma kidnapped me from my dad. That’s a crazy thing to find out. I know. ’cause she’s my best friend. And then suddenly, you know. Right, because Ira and I would, we meet weekly working on this, this American Life story, right? Mm-hmm. And then, you know, I’d be on the laptop and he’s like, okay, so I helped you research what happened, you know? ’cause my dad had full custody of me in Japan, uh, after my parents divorce and you know, and then I was like, oh, strange. Like, but I didn’t know that. So that’s what he was helping me figure out. And I went to go interview my dad in Japan, you know, who, um, I was separated from for many, many years. Because my grandma, you know, said we were coming to America on a two month vacation. Told my dad that too. Yeah. And so we’re like, okay, we’ll be back. See you after you know, I’ll bring something back from Disneyland and then, you know, right. 27 years later, still here, still on vacation, still living the dream. Ira one time, early on he was like, okay, so, um. Technically what she did is kidnapping. Mm-hmm. And I looked up the rules with California and you could still press charges. I was like, what? Yeah. You know, just looking over to the other room at my grandma, she’s like, just cooking. Yeah. I’m like, you know? Mm-hmm. Yeah. And so it’s a complex thing, but you know, I know she did it outta love. Blah, blah, blah. So, yeah, I, I do joke that you never wanna make the news, you never wanna be an inspiration, right? ’cause that means your life was bad when you were a kid. You said that you had really low expectations for yourself and you didn’t have really big dreams. Mm-hmm. Which I think is something that I identify with as well, because my dream was just to make it to the next day without some sort of explosion happening in my life. Yeah. And I kept doing that, but to me, I found it was a bit of a superpower because if, if you don’t have a dream, you can sort of exceed that. In a way it’s not a limiting factor that you put on yourself. Totally. Um, how have you found yourself, like setting goals for yourself now? I’m always like, gotta keep up, you know? Yeah. You started later or, you know what I mean? Mm-hmm. And everything comes so fast and so there’s more eyes on you too, right? You want to not fail. You wanna always be funny when you are doing the shows and you know, so, so you just put a lot more pressure on yourself. Right. Mm-hmm. And you’re on tour, but you, you also want to take care of your family. But that’s catch 22 is like when you’re on tour, like when I’m doing my international tours, I’m gone for sometimes a month. Yeah. That’s a month I’m not with my mom and grandma. Right. And they’re aging rapidly. Mm-hmm. You know, there is a fear of like it’s, it could go away. This sounds really bleak, but there is a potential world in which you could have said like, I need to take care of myself. I don’t have time to take care of my family. You could have cut and run and sort of written your own story independently. Mm-hmm. Did you ever think about doing that? And what stopped you? I mean, I think a lot of, a lot of people do it. Yeah. You know? Oh, but, but what are they talking about then? Airplanes and hotel rooms. Some of them genuinely do talk about that. Yeah. I always say when a comedian’s only doing jokes about airplanes and hotel rooms that they, they need to go and live life again. You know? Yeah. And like be amongst things you love. In my comedy, I talk about the things I love, you know, it’s easier to complain and talk about the things you hate. It’s a, it’s a bit of like the perennial cheerleader energy where it’s like, if you say like. Everything’s great. Right. Even if it’s not, it’s more likely to be if you said it and sort of put that out there, right? That’s true. Yeah. Yeah. The whole like you go team, we got this. We don’t know if we got it. No, not at all. We’re not even playing the sport. We’re not the one with the ball. We have no idea, but, you know, uh, we love a hype person because of that. Yeah. Bring back more hype people, little John. Flavor flav. Yeah. They were some of our first cheerleaders in our lives. Little John turned down for what he doesn’t even know. He doesn’t, he doesn’t even know what he’s talking about. Yeah. Everything’s, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Atsuko, for course number three. Of your final meal on earth, we have the ebi fry. This is fried sweet shrimp with Japanese curry and melted cheese on top with some white steamed rice. And then we have the Yaki Tori platter. So we actually have the chicken butt and we have the soe, the meatballs, as well as normal chicken thigh, and then a little bit of soy mixed with egg yolk. Oh, and then of course, uh, ramune. The greatest, most interactive drink to ever exist in the history of Japan. This is my other side of the culture, the Taiwanese side we covered, and then now the Japanese side. Yeah. I’m curious what feels like home to you, because you, you lived in, in Japan until you were 10 years old. I believe. I was eight. Yeah. Right. Mm-hmm. Yeah, my dad would make curry because curry is some of the easiest, like bachelor food. Mm-hmm. Japanese curry is something I I like to make on my own at home. And it was like what my dad would make me. Yeah. That was our time together. Yeah. Before my grandma kidnapped me. Grandma! Uh, tell me about the ramune. I haven’t had one of these. In years and there’s something about a ball that you push through a hole. That’s all I remember. Yeah, right. Oh, you’ve done it. Done. But how do you, I don’t remember how to push the ball. I haven’t had these in probably over — You have to take this, you have to open, you have to take this out actually. Okay. My nails are kind of long, so maybe I’ll use that. Wait did I do it right? Yeah. Oh, ah, ah, wait. Here you take that. I’ll take yours. Okay. Thank you. Alright. Yeah. And then you, you push it in like that. You, you just kinda like, I feel like should we do it on three? Yeah. Like at 1, 2, 3, go. I’m so dainty. Not that you need a man to help, but I am here if you want. You are strong, independent. Yeah, I almost popped a vessel. Yes, please. One man. Okay. I gotcha. Thank you so much. Ah, thank you. Cheers. Cheers. It’s been a minute for me too. Okay. You were a lot stronger when you were a child. You, I really was. I think you get weaker right? This is an interesting size hole to drink out of because it’s inco, inconvenient. Well, it’s either, it’s too, uh, sort of small for you to kind of just purse your lips on, but it’s feels weird for me to just, well, how did you do it? You know, you just, yeah. Really quickly. You, you’re not supposed to drink a lot at a time. I think it’s just like kind of prohibits you from getting everything. I think that’s it. I think it’s a very American instinct for me to try and chug everything. And it’s a very Japanese thing to be like, you can’t have it all at the same time, sweetie. Okay. Pleasure is pain. Okay, so everyone does look. Yeah, yeah, yeah. We all look like a baby drinking it. Yeah. Yeah, yeah. You can’t drink it like a coca Coca-Cola. Uh, please dig into the curry. I’ve never had cheese on curry before. You’ve never? No, I, I’m not like the biggest cheese fan. Okay. In general. Okay. A cheese is like a huge discovery, cheese and ranch dressing when it came to America. Mm-hmm. I was like, whoa, give it to me. All of it. This is, this is my east meets West. My dad didn’t make curry with cheese on it. You visited Taiwan and Japan. Now as an adult, did you feel like any sense of home going there? Like did you find what you were looking for? It’s so wild that, you know, I, I’ve been able to go back more as an adult because I am now a touring comedian. Mm-hmm. You know, internationally tour places that not all American Comedians tour, you know, Taiwan, American comedians don’t go and. Try to make Taiwanese people laugh. Yeah. You know what I mean? Yeah, yeah. Of course. But there’s a homecoming for me, and Sure. There’s some comedians like, I don’t know, Ricky Gervais or something that’ll perform in Tokyo, but when he performs, he’s performing for other British people. Yeah. Ex Max showing up. Mm-hmm. Locals come and see me, whether it’s in Jakarta, Malaysia, Singapore, there was this really awesome moment touring this special. Right in Japan. It was my first time performing there to, you know, uh, a big theater, right? And I had sold out the shows. And I say in Japanese, when you come home, you say, Taima, which means I’m home. And then your family members say, welcome back. And I said that to the audience. I said, I’m home. And they all collectively said to me. Welcome, welcome back and like I almost cried ’cause I was like, like I can barely like speak Japanese enough to, you know, be able to hold a conversation with adults anymore. Yeah. You know, thousands of strangers telling me I’m welcome. It was, it was really cool. Yeah. When you went back to see your dad shooting this American life, you said that you were kind of searching for. Like who the hero was in your story, who the villain was in your story. Mm-hmm. Whether it was your dad that sort of let you go, or your grandmother who forcibly kidnapped you. Um, what you seem to come away from was this like, just beautiful like empathy for every single person, which I think is really important. Is that like a guiding life philosophy for you? Like the whole thing, right. We never wanted to be here anyway. Yeah. Yeah. So people are gonna make wild decisions. Mm-hmm. But there’s good intention there a lot of times. And when there’s good intention there. You know, I think it’s okay to be, um, more understanding. Um, but it’s also why I’m not gonna have kids. No. Yeah. Remember I’m the one wandering in the streets, remember? That’s me. Yeah. Can you imagine me? And then a toddler next to me, same haircut, also confused. No, no. She’d go missing. We’d both go missing. Yeah. There seems almost something like fatalistic about the worldview. Like, um, my, I don’t know if I have empathy for every, Eat your yakitori. Eat the yakitori while I talk at you. ’cause this is the time you get to eat when I just talk at you. Yeah. Sorry. You were saying something. Yeah. You gotta eat. It has to enter your mouth and then I’m gonna start talking. Okay. I don’t know if I have empathy for people so much as this reluctant agreement with the fact that none of us can help what we are, especially growing up with a mentally ill mom it the way I figured it. Like there’s just a circuit board in her head. Mm-hmm. And one of the switches was just flipped the wrong way. Right. And then that’s what made her throw soup cans. Mm-hmm. You know? In the same way that I think in myself, one of those switches could switch the wrong way. At any given moment it could happen, or it could have been born with a different switch. Mm-hmm. Flip. So anytime I see somebody, I feel like empathy is almost a positive version of that. But in my view, it’s just they didn’t ask to be like that. Mm-hmm. And they simply can’t help themselves. Do you ultimately think people can change or are we somewhat just fixed in this life? Oh yeah. I’m so like. It’s what hurts me over and over though. Mm-hmm. Because I always think people can change. Right? Yeah. I always think, you know, underneath my, the layers of my mom, the things, you know, when she does throw a temper tantrum or when she is like yelling about, you know, the Chinese government’s gonna get us and things like that. That one might be true. That’s, you know, sometimes that does happen. I always think underneath all that, right? Mm-hmm. There’s a true Linda Lee somewhere. She goes by Linda. Our whole family. My grandma goes by Inchi Lee. I’m Atsuko Okatsuka and my mom just goes by Linda. You’re kind of like the original Iron Iron Chef series where there was like Iron Chef Japan, iron Chef China. That’s right. -French. -With the Olympic. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Mm-hmm. We are. Remember the ET ride at Universal Studios? I’ve only been on the one in Florida, but yeah, I think it was the same. So does ET, ET gets your name in the beginning, right? Yes. And then there’s three people per bike. Mm-hmm. And then you take off into the city, right? Yeah. Yeah. And then at the end, ET says goodbye and says all your names. He says, thank you. Right. And the names. And when I say that my family broke ET, I’m just. [gibberish] Goodbye, Linda. It’s traumatizing. I was like, did we break him? Why is he doing that? The craziest names. I learned that you’re supposed to tell ET your name is like butt ass that way. One thing he goes like, thank you butt ass for saving the world. So you could have said that. Yeah, I mean, I wish I could be a smart ass like that. All I wanted to do was be seen as an immigrant. You know. Atsuko, for dessert. Ostensibly, uh, we have the final course of your final meal. This is all from holy Basil tie in Atwater. We have the shrimp curry, we have the crispy pork belly, we have the crab fried rice, and then we have a really, really cool dish. This is what they call their Thai agu Chile. They would not give us raw shrimp to throw in our trunk. Um, but what we did is recreate it. From scratch actually using the chef’s guidance. This is Colby again. He talked to the chef at Holy Basil. Wow. On how to make it so we have some crispy fried shrimp heads on there as well. Uh, please dig in. Why holy basil? Well, you know, as we, uh, get older. And you know, there’s also now an autoimmune disease, right? Mm-hmm. In our family. Uh, and I treat it kind of like, like I don’t want people to feel alone. Right? Yeah. Again, I don’t want anyone to feel alone. So, you know, uh, he’s like, I’m Celiac. I’m like, no, we celiac. When we’re at restaurants, I’m like, we are celiac. Kind of like people go, we’re pregnant. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It’s like that. So I do that and, you know, and, uh, holy Basil Thai Food Act actually has a lot of like, naturally gluten-free foods. Mm-hmm. And holy basil really like considers that too, and I love how creative their dishes are. Um, it’s, you know, Chinese Thai influence and it’s so close to our house. Please, can I, can I dish you up some? Oh, yes, please. Or you can eat straight outta here. If you’re not worried about germs, you can take the, the whole. Okay. But I can also, I’ll also use my spoon. Thank you. Absolutely. No, thank you. You thank you for being here. This has been wonderful. Oh, so fun. I, I guess I don’t know how to use a spoon. I was wondering about that. I, well, I, I’m really bad at using, huh? Do you want me to try and be kind of like, oh, thank you so much. It’s very nice. Oh yeah. No. Yeah. I’ll just use that. I wasn’t even meaning to eat it, but it ended up in my mouth. How is it? Well, you, you ate it now I feel bad ’cause you your last meal and I ate it before you. Imagine less meals are like this, ha, ha, ha, you know? Mm-hmm. Peaceful. And you get to do it with a friend. Is that how you, you want to go? Yeah. Right. It’s the people that make life for me. You know, some people wanna like retire in a forest or something. Mm-hmm. Away from people mountain. Get me away, you know? Yeah. Live by the, yeah. That’s my biggest fear. That’s like a nightmare for me. Is that being alone or being in like a stranded environment. It’s being alone, being away from people, being away from hearing, like the laughter of people and, you know what I mean? Like. People think I’m insane when I say this, but uh, you know, my dream place to live would be like Hollywood and Highland with lights, you know? Yeah. Sounds, music. You know, Spider-Man and Batman trying to get pictures with tourists, a last meal with other people would be. You have also said though, that your ideal way to die would be splashing around in a mall fountain for 40 minutes and then walking into a Sephora and putting on all the premium products and then simply dropping dead in the middle of the aisles. Right. Where does that come from? That’s a crowd. There’s a lot of people being a lot around a lot of people. Being watched in the fountain. Right? Right. Mm-hmm. And then, right. And then the free samples that you could get from Sephora. If you’re about to die, I guess this is a moral question. You could just take the whole bottle if you’re sort of on the way out, but you don’t want to inconvenience. Then yeah, I would, yeah. I would be like, sorry. I have two seconds left. Put on all the, the makeup. Yeah. Right. So then when the crowd comes around me, they’ll go, oh, she’s beautiful. I, I hope that we can make that happen for you somehow. You know what I mean? I mean, we, the, the collective, right. So, hurry. Mm-hmm. Where’s there Sephora? People are like, take her to the ER. They’re like, no, the mall’s that way. Right. That’s me. I’m curious what 13-year-old Atsuko would say to adult Atsuko if she were to talk to her now about how her life turned out. Oh, they always ask this question and it’s impo. It’s impossible to answer. I think it can be a fun, reflective exercise though. Yeah, so, so she’s talking to me like, oh, so it was just me. Older and Okay. And she’s not, she didn’t faint or anything? Uh, no. Do you think she would’ve fainted? Because again, talking about having like a, I would’ve. If some person came to you. Yeah. You’re 13. Sure. Right. Uhhuh, I’m you now? Yes. Hey, it’s Josh. You but older, wouldn’t you? Wouldn’t you run away? That’s a kidnapper. I’d be like, that’s a kidnapper mom. No, it’s so much more depressing. Grandma. I’d go, he has this crazy woman’s talking to me. I’d go, he has what my mom has and, and this is a very normal interaction for me. That probably me too. You know what I mean? That’s true. This again, is a more hypothetical exercise. Reflect on your own life though, as opposed to like an actual if a, to me, I, yeah, I guess, right. I’d like, oh wow. Like, you know, ’cause back to the ice cream. Yeah. Back to Cold Stone, Uhhuh. You know, I didn’t dare to dream big. So my dream as a kid, my biggest dream as a kid was to work at an ice cream parlor. Mm. And then at age 17, I did. And I was like, okay, I die now. You know what I mean? Yeah, of course. So I think she would be like. Whoa, you. She would be stoked that I worked on an ice cream parlor. She’d be like, oh my God, we do that. I’m like, and then I’d be like, yeah, but we also like tour as a comedian, and it’s really cool. She’d be like, but cold stove, she’d probably be more stoked about that. I don’t know. What dreams do you currently have to keep you going then? This is the harder upkeep, right? Sure. Just like every standup special gets harder and harder too. Yeah, and this one, I’m very proud, you know that. Like, it’s even better than the intruder, my first one. And I’m very proud of that one too, but it’s like even better and funnier and I’m just, you know, I, I’m just always, this is like the craft I’m so, uh, obsessed about and I, I love it and I am, I study it and I’m a nerd about, and, um, so yeah. I just, it’s just always being more and more on top of your game. Yeah. Just keep getting better and better and perfecting it even more. Yeah. What do you think happens when you die? This, this man never stops, you know? Yeah. I don’t go to church anymore, so I truly don’t think about it either. Not at all. Yeah. I think we maybe, I think it just ends there, but you know, hey, you know, um, we’ll always have the tapes. Like this one. Like these tapes? Yeah. Yeah. Was that supposed to be inspirational? That sounds, I don’t mean to sound, but like was that so I would be a terrible like speaker of if someone was looking for hope in that realm, I’d be like, oh sweetie, I don’t, I think it just kind of like goes away, but you know. But the stories about you do ex continue. Yeah. And that’s true. And that part does get me emotional because it’s true. Like it’s what you’ve shared with the world and, and, and your neighbors, your friends, your family, the people that you care about or people who don’t, you don’t even know that maybe you’ve touched, you know, those memories will continue and it does. That’s what matters. Yeah. Yeah. And that’s what you keep striving for. Yeah. Truly. Yeah. Beautiful. You ready to get into the lightning round? Yes. Who’s the one person dead or alive you’d want to share your actual last meal with? Are these real people? Can it, does it have to be a real person? Mm-hmm. Stitch. Stitch. The live action or animated stitch? The live action Live because I think it’s closer to possible. Yeah. You invented the Viral Drop challenge on TikTok. Will you teach me how to do it after the show? Yeah, we should. We should. We could even do it here later. Yeah, after the show. ’cause you have to do the lightning room. Okay. What song do you want to be played at your funeral? Um, ooh. I’m really into party for you right now. It’s, you know, been out for a long time, Charlie X, CX, but. Yeah. If you could haunt one person after you die, who would it be? Oh, uh oh. This one girl from, uh, middle school. Yeah, she was all, she thought she was all that. Yeah. Hope she gets to come over. Who’s your Mount Rushmore standup comedians? Oh. Oh yeah. There’s a Margaret Cho, Tig Nataro, Chelsea Handler. Um. There was four heads, right? Mm-hmm. I couldn’t name them, but. Chris Rock, he really influenced me a lot. Nice. Who’s your dream eulogize at your funeral? It could literally be any of my, I have so many comedian friends. I’m, I’m lucky. It’ll be funny whoever. Put all the names in a hat. Yeah. And it’s like, oh gosh. Burt Kreischer, take your shirt off. Um, oh, Tig. Tig is very dry. Yeah. So I think, yeah, she’d be great. Nice. Uh, what’s one style of haircut that you wish you could try out? Maybe that. Yeah, maybe you, yeah, I don’t know. I thought you were gonna touch it. Yeah, forehead. I haven’t shown forehead in a long time. What’s your biggest fear? I don’t know. It’s either like, people I love, like, you know, suffering or, you know, me not being able to like, keep up, you know, and please the audiences or whatever. What’s your greatest regret in life? I don’t know if, I don’t think I have, uh, that, yeah. None. Yeah. Stand by every decision. Mm-hmm. You stand by how many bags you brought. Yeah. ’cause they were kind of out of the way. Right. They were. And some of it came in handy. Speaking of, I brought you a gift. I’ve been waiting to give this to you. Every so many, so many courses. Every course. I thought, oh, oh. Alright. This is a chance you never gave me a chance. I bring you this from Japan. I gave one thank, thank. No, thank you. This is really sweet. Yes. Two, I gave you ample chances. I gave you ample chances. I softballed you this last chance could doing this nice thing. Thank you. Uh, of course our only question left is are you happy? I am, yes. Yeah. Thank you for feeding me today. Yeah, no, truly. Thank you so much for, for showing up. I, I am genuinely a big fan ever since I first saw you and all your specials and sharing a meal with you. This really wonderful, uh, Ira Glass called you an inspiration, and I would also call you that as well. So truly thank you. Wow. Dude, are we what’s going on with the, with the, trying to feel it. Oh, cut. Hold it close. Atsuko, if you wanna deliver your last words to that camera right there. Live, laugh, love. Damn. You just made that up right now? Mm-hmm. That’s incredible. Everyone, make sure you check out. Father. It’s on Hulu now. Atsuko, you got anything else to plug? That’s, that’s the special. I’m on tour. atsukocomedy.com. Buy a tandem bike. Ride it with your sweetie. Or your best friend. Have you actually ridden a tandem bike before? Yeah. Uh, we own a tandem bike now. Me and my husband. Incredible. Yeah. So that everyone knows we’re together. That’s how you, when we’re out and about. That’s how you’re gonna die, though.