Oh, my God, I used to get smacked with a bigger one, because it would’ve have like a- What, ’cause you had a bigger ass than me? Yeah, oh, I got a bigger ass! Thanks, Josh. What, how many squats, don’t- You hit me, my father will sue you. Hey, welcome to “Mythical Kitchen” where dreams become food and please welcome friend of the show, Courtney Miller. Courtney, there she is, secret handshake. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. That’s our handshake. That was pretty good. Courtney, we’re makin’ Sloppy Joes today. Yes. Yeah, can you tell the folks a little bit about your relationship with Sloppy Joes and how you like to slop on that slop? I love to slop on that Joe, guys. I love Sloppy Joes. Grew up eating them all the time, but also there’s a little backstory on this. ‘Cause you guys were like, “hey, can we make a video together?” And I was like, “actually, yeah, if you could, if you guys could make me a Sloppy Joe.” Because one day, Trevor, you know, Trevor Evarts on Twitter- I heard of him. He has a great podcast. Listen to his podcast. Yeah, oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. He saw me in the parking lot having a bad day, you know, and then he offered me like, “hey, to cheer you up, I’d love to make you something sometime.” And I was like, “could you maybe make me Sloppy Joe, maybe?” And he was like, “yeah, one day I will do it.” And like, we are just so busy here at Mythical LLC. True. And yeah, so it just never happened. But today it’s finally happening. But where’s Trevor? What? Trevor couldn’t be here right now. Trevor was bad so we put him in the bad place. Makes sense. But I’m very excited. I’m very excited for Sloppy Joes today. And I heard you had like a little bit of a surprise for me. Oh, we got a little bit of surprise, Courtney. We’re doing not one, not three, but two, two different, we’re making two slop, because we’re making one like normal OG Sloppy Jose. Classic. Yeah, give you the bones. And then we’re making, not like bones, like in the Sloppy Joe, like the bones of a recipe to improve, ’cause we like to add value to people’s lives here at Mythical Kitchen. And then you also like ramen. I see you making your ramen hacks all the time. Yes, addicted. So we’re also doing a ramen-inspired Sloppy Joe, folks. This is gonna be absolutely incredible . Yes. We got Trevor in the bad place, and then let’s see if we can make Courtney have another bad day so she wants more food in the parking lot. Why was you having a bad day? Ah, you know, people just, we just be having bad days. We go through a lot of highs here and then a lot of lows. Lotta lows. You gotta have the lows to enjoy the highs. Yeah. So it’s all good. And whenever there’s food involved, I’m instantly feeling better. Yeah, but then the food’s gone and then you go right back down. Yeah, you gotta wait till the next meal. Let’s get cooking. Yeah! I used to get smacked with this as a kid when I was little. Really? Yeah. Yeah, oh my God, I used to get smacked with a bigger one ’cause it would have like a- What, ’cause you had a bigger ass than me? Yeah, oh, I got a bigger ass, what? How many squats, don’t. You hit me, my father will sue you. My ass is bigger than your ass. No, my ass is bigger, my ass is assier than, hey, welcome back to the very normal cooking show where we’re cooking Sloppy Joes. Yeah. That’s like a very normal cooking show thing to do. And normally we put like Doritos in it, or like a bunch of . Bugs. Yeah, yeah. But no, Sloppy Joe. Courtney, do you wanna chop up, we got two bell peppers and onion and some garlic and we got beef and then I’m just gonna name all. We got vinegar, we got sugar, we got Worcestershire, we got tomato paste. We got a little jar- What did you pronounce this is? Worcestershire. How do you pronounce it? Okay, I don’t know. You just said it really fast. I was like, is he trying to blow over that? Definitely. ‘Cause I call it worshashashar. Woshashaar is the longest running Guy Fieri bit- Yeah! In the Guy Fieri cinematic universe that he calls it that. Washing machine. Washing machine. We’re gonna add that to this. You wanna start chopping some vegetables? Yeah. I’m gonna throw this beef in a pan. How do I chop them? Like do you need them diced or sliced? Diced, I think like a fine dice. Fine dice. What’s your platonic ideal of Sloppy Joe? Like ideal Sloppy Joe? Yeah, yeah. Stale burger buns. Good. We got ’em air drying over there. Nice. Yeah, yeah, it’s nice. I don’t know. Basically, I’m pretty sure I just had it straight out the can. Manwich. Manwich. Manwich, it’s not for women. We gender our loose meat sandwiches around here. I added some black pepper, paprika, and salt to the beef and I’m gonna chop it up. Courtney, you’re doing great. That is like the, wait, wait, wait, hold on, hold on, hold on, can I show you somethin’? Can I show somethin’ real quick, can I show you somethin’? So- What are you doing? That’s good, that’s a good first move. Cool, hat, good hat. Also, trash bowl. And then you do that and we can keep that. And then what I would do- Ooh, little butt. I would take that. Ooh, that’s a you butt. That’s my three butt. I have three butt cheeks. Did you know? Yeah, yeah. Some people like in, what’s that movie, “Total Recall”. She got three boobies? Yeah, yeah. I got three butt cheeks, also. Oh, so that’s how you- Slice it down there then you can unravel it. Oh! Yeah. And then you take the knife and then you shave it across like that. I don’t know why I’m like so gentle with vegetables, even though I’m literally about to obliterate them with a blade. Yeah, yeah. And then you can do this and then you got nice long strips. So you can go like chop, chop, chop, chop. Chop, chop, chop, chop. Yeah, you got that? Yeah, yeah. Cool, I’m gonna mash this beef. You mash that beef, bro. I’m sure you do that every day. What? It’s unhealthy if you don’t. True. It is. No, you’re right. I’m just saying, like we need, I think, now this is getting into weird territory, but I think you should teach it in schools. Everybody treat your beefs and meats well. I just think we need to normalize it and teach it in school. I’m talking about sandwiches. What are you talking? What, masturbation. Oh. Maybe- My brother told me that you tugged on your balls and so- And I’m gonna not cook so we can cut around this. What is this, “Jackass 4”? And so literally I’m there just yanking at- That’s hilarious. At my hangle bangles down there. Just like, nothing’s happening. And yeah, I thought there was something wrong with me and ’cause no teacher ever told me. Courtney, where are you from? You give off strong Utah vibes. Oh, that sucks. No, I don’t think so. Just kidding. I have a lot of family in Utah, but I’m actually from California. Wait, where? The Valley. You have strong Agoura vibes. Yeah. I love that and Sloppy Joes are native to the California Valley region. They grow next to the succulents. Oh my gosh, Sloppy Joes do? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Wow, I wish I had that instead of canned ones. Ooh, speaking of how dumb I was when I was a kid, I thought ground beef grew from the ground until I was like 10. No one teaches you these things! Is this finely chopped enough? Or does it need to be like way smaller? No, that’s pretty good, that’s pretty good. The good thing about a Sloppy Joe is nothing matters. And the good thing about life is- ‘Cause they’re sloppy! Sloppy! We’re all just gonna exist in non-eternity for forever. You know, like it’s just gonna happen. And so I just think you can throw them in like that. That’s good. Do you wanna like- But I need to put the green ones. You can just add everything. And my Sloppy Joes are very forgiving. Am I chopping too slow? Make the Sloppy Joe your canvas. Yeah. You’re an artist. Yeah. There it is. That’s all. That’s proper technique. Okay, that’s all you want? Anybody want a snack? What are you gonna do with the butt? I like to dip this in hummus. That’s good! I’ve actually tried, I think I’ve tried that in mustard. It’s nice! Or you can make a sandwich with it. Like those a-holes on TikTok? Like, “I’m low carb!” And it like sucks. People make sandwiches out of those. And I’m like, I don’t even know freaking, what’s happening with that? But it actually sounds very crisp and nice. ‘Cause I like a crisp sandwich. What do you mean, a crisp sandwich? Look at this, so cool. Like, lots of lettuce, fresh like roast turkey, not toasting the bread. Untoasted bread is key for Sloppy Joe. You gotta microwave it. Microwave? Nicole’s laughing at me ’cause I told her I toast my Sloppy Joe buns. She’s like, “you shouldn’t” and I’m like, “you’re right.” Wow. The point is I’m willing to learn. That’s a good thing. You’re willing. The first step is just- Do you wanna learn another fun trick? What? It’s the finger trick. I’m scared. No, it’s good. You should be scared doing what you’re doing. ‘Cause you’re like here, right? You know, you’re doing that. You tuck your fingers in a claw. Oh, yeah. Tuck your fingers in a claw then you can do one of them bad boys. Because here in Mythical Kitchen, we practice safety in the kitchen. Except for when we don’t. I feel like a gorilla. Sloppy Joe. Do you guys remember when we captured a gorilla and then put it in captivity and taught it about death and then it got depressed? But then we gave it a kitten so it was okay. We gave it a cat to say sorry for making you confront your immortality. Sorry we made you literally feel existential dread. Here’s a kitten. We made it racist, too. Coco hated other gorillas and was like, “no, gorillas ugly. I’m human, beautiful.” And it was like, oh no, Coco. Oh, no. Everyone is ingrained with it at some point, you know? Okay, should I put a little bit in there? Yeah, yeah, drop a little of that in there. Am I taking too long? Yeah. But only like if I’m being honest. If I were to lie to you, I would say no, this is great. Okay. Okay, okay, okay, I’ll do the onion. I’ll do the garlic. Courtney, go stir that meat. Okay. Go stir that meat. I make tacos a lot. Oh. And I use Impossible beef. Oh, you know what, Impossible beef’s good. Do you want me to like turn the heat down so we’re not burning this? No, turn it up, turn it up. If it ever gets too high, just dump in all the liquid on it. But yeah, I like to make my own taco shells by like taking tortillas and frying them in the oil. And so yeah, I do a lot of taco nights. You make WPTs. White people taco night. White people taco night. Listen, we grew up with it. We didn’t know. No one taught us how to pull our beef or whatever. No one taught us any better. No one taught us, you know, about taxes. What the hell are those? Gotta do that soon. Makes me want to throw up. I will say, , I will say, wow, you’re very fast. Thank you. I didn’t even get to catch that happening. Do you wanna palm heel strike some garlic? This is the most important cooking technique. Oh, you palm them? So a lot of people think that you should use their knife but that’s weird ’cause then you’re just like hitting a knife. Why not just like smash it like that? Well, because not everybody’s strong like you, Josh. No, strong is a mindset, Courtney. And then also a series of statistics based on your Big 3 power lifts and two Olympic lifts. Okay. You’re from Utah. But packaged taco seasoning really, it slaps. No, no. You use the packaged taco seasoning? I do. I don’t even wanna try and beat that. It’s just so good. Sometimes you just let people be good at what they do and just use it. That’s fair. I say no to packaged taco seasoning as I’m just squirting ketchup in beef. There’s no ketchup in the ketchup. Hold on, hold on. There’s no ketchup. There it is. Oh. There it is. All right, I got a little vinegar for acid. Ooh. A little bit of sugar ’cause you’re gonna want Sloppy Joes to be nice and sweet. Sweet. A little bit of what? Washing machine. Little bit of washing machine sauce. Warshasharashine. A little bit of stock. And I want you to stir that around. We’re gonna let it get nice and sloppy. I’m gonna squirt some of that in there. I don’t know what that is. That’s gonna be good. Is that olive oil or something? Or death. Both. We talked Sloppy Joe buns shouldn’t be toasted. Nicole taught me that eight minutes ago and I agree with it. And so what we’re gonna do instead is we’re gonna wrap it in wet paper towels, like a Crunchwrap. And I’m gonna pop this in the microwave for 18 seconds. It’ll steam the buns. Courtney, give me 18 seconds. Time me. 18, 17, 16, like that? Yeah, do you think there’s any carcinogens from microwaving a paper towel? What’s carcinogens? We got wet buns. Wet buns! Yeah, feel how wet that bun is. Wow, so moist. That’s nice, right? Slop up, slop up the buns. Should I turn it off? Yeah, there is gonna be molten. It’s gonna destroy our mouths. You’re never gonna wear that Invisalign again. I like might not even let you eat that one ’cause I wanna eat both of these. This is like not even a bit. I didn’t eat breakfast. Neither did I. But also I’m afraid of confrontation. So I’ll just let you do it. Do you wanna try some, because hot mustard on Sloppy Joes is one of my favorite things. Can I have it like I dip it? Yeah. Thanks, ’cause I wanna taste what you guys made and then the mustard, you guys didn’t make that. We didn’t make it. The other guys made that. No, this is Heinz. Heinz. German, which side are they on? All right, great way to hold on. What I do is I take my Sloppy Joe because the bottom bun is to gonna get a lot more stress on it. Oh, ’cause it’s skinnier? Yeah, and so I flip it and I let that rest for about 15, 30 seconds. Pick this up. Let me know if this isn’t the sloppiest Joseph you ever had ’cause this is wet. Too wet? Yeah, she is wet. Let’s do it. Mm. Oh, oh, so hot. Oh my God. Oh, oh, oh, oh. Oh, this is so good. You feel like you’ve been empowered to eat Sloppy Joes? I’m about to get sloppy on this show, man. Oh, I’ve been sloppy on this show. The mustard is good with it. I’ve never done that. It cuts it a little bit. I might even go crazy and put a little bit of raw onion on my Sloppy Joes. Mm. I get a little weird. For texture. What I like to do if it gets too sloppy on the mouth, use the bread to wipe my mouth. Then you don’t lose any flavor. Then you don’t miss anything. Yeah, I keep a slice of bread to use as a napkin next to me when I eat. What if I told you, Courtney, we have not two more, but one more Sloppy Joe to make that uses, what something I know about you is that you eat ramen, to make it. Are you actually using that footage of him trying to say that? You wanna cook some pork? Yes. All right, cool, so we’re making a, I’m calling it like a ramen-inspired Sloppy Joe ’cause we’re using the flavors that you might find in ramen. We got like the nori and the sesame and the furikake right there, really delicious flavors. Furikake. Do you mess with furikake? I love furikake. I put that on my ramen. Hell, yeah. That makes sense. Well, we’re puttin’ it in the Sloppy Joe. Look, we did it, we’re doing it, God dang, this is awesome. And then Togarashi. Togarashi is a seven spice blend with dried orange peel and chile to make it a little spicy. And then we got mirin, we got sake, we got red miso, shiitake mushrooms, scallions, ginger. It’s gonna be dankity dank. Do you wanna cook that ground pork? We’re usin’ pork, you eat pork? I eat pork, yeah. Oh, thank God. You did not check with me. We didn’t check with any, have food allergies? No, we just go, we just go. We just go. All right, so I’m gonna chop up some shiitake mushrooms right here. Should I put it in? Yeah, yeah, just dump it in there and then start mashing it around. I like a really fine grain. Okay, you got it. So, I’m going to chop up the shiitakes really fine. Kinda hit them with that. You’re very good at that, bro. What, no, I’m not good at that. Have you ever chopped up a body? No, but I feel like I would know how to break down a human body ’cause, you know, butchering a chicken, every chef knows how to do. But you really just find the joints, you crack through ’em, and then it becomes pretty evident where you’re supposed to make the cuts. All right, well, now I know who to call. Have you seen “Yellowjackets”? Oh, no, but I’d like to. Dude, very good. And “RuPaul’s Drag Race”, of course. Yeah, you watchin’ “All Stars”? You watch, what was it, “UK vs the World”? I actually haven’t watched any of the UK yet. I have watched every single episode of “RuPaul’s Drag Race”, except for UK. What would your drag name be? My drag name, I don’t know, I feel like I have this character on our sketch channel and our other channels called Brianna Boho. But I also have a drag king persona that’s Dominic Patrone. He’s that guy, oh, is that a slice of pineapple? Yeah, it’s ginger. I didn’t have anything to grate it with so I just threw it in there. Okay. You wanna chop it harder? Wait, hold on, no. I’m trying to get the ginger. I’m trying to get, hold on, let me grate this ginger, dude. Okay, hold for sound. Wait, can you move real quick? Yeah. Wait, where’s it? Yip, yip. Trevor. Got it. Just like perfectly grates your ass. My ass is perfectly grated now. So we’re gonna add some red miso in there. That’s gonna add a lot of that ramen-y flavor. That’s like that fermented soybean. We’re gonna use the ginger as a little tool to get that out. I love that. So we don’t waste. No, we don’t waste. And then- Oh! Furikake, Togarashi. Mirin for sweetness and then more sugar. Woo hoo! And then stock. Yes! All right. Courtney, stir that around, chop it up. Keep chopping that for about 15 minutes. I’m gonna go hang out over here. This smells incredible. I could be a drag king. I think I might do that. Chop faster, wench! Thank you. Oh, here’s the thing. This is clear and so I didn’t see it. Yeah, but it should go in there ’cause this is sake and it’s nice. ‘Cause you get sake in the base of some ramen broth so you put that in the tare that you add to it. And now, after Dominic, what was the name? Dominic Toretto? Dominic Patrone. After Dominic Toretto chops up the beef more, the pork, which is made of pig. It’s like beef, but pig. We’ll be done. Beef but pig. We got a ramen-inspired Sloppy Joe. You ready? I’m so ready. I’m ready, too. Okay, so here’s what we’re gonna do. Take those eggs out. Yeah. We got some like marinated ramen eggs. Just kinda, just grab it and then you kinda like, kinda shake off the moisture a little bit. Yeah, there you go. And then cut that in half. My plan on this is we’re gonna take some of this delicious ground pork, red miso Sloppy Joe mixture. And we’re gonna put a little base on and then we’re gonna take half of a hard boiled egg and just shove it in the middle and then we’re gonna pack meat around the egg. I’m so fricking excited. I think that’s pretty exciting. Got a nice soft boil in there. Dude, I’ve never made a seasoned egg. I’ve always wanted to make a seasoned egg. They’re actually really great and like pretty easy to do. Yeah, you just kinda soft boil them and then put them in soy sauce. Soy, sugar, mirin, all the good stuff. And then it’s gonna kinda like, the egg’s gonna kinda warm up from this beef. This makes me really excited. Warm up on the beef, warm up on the beef. This is not beef. Warm up from the beef. I know, well, beef’s just a figure of speech. Like not according to the FDA. All right, you down with the scallions. Okay. A little scallions. Can I do the sesame seeds? Yes, do the sesame seeds, do the sesame seeds. Got some sesame, scallions. There it is, there it is. You know that guy’s restaurant gets like sued every month. ‘Cause he’s like chargin’ people $1,500 for steak and no one tells ’em it cost that much. Then they like call the police and the police say, “what do you want us to do?” “Like, well, they wouldn’t pay their bill.” “Stop charging 1500 for steak, you weirdo.” Yeah, is it because he’s Salt Bae that they’re so expensive? Yeah, it doesn’t cost, puts like $8 worth of a gold flake on it. Salt Bae, stop doin’ what you’re doin’. And he says some weird stuff about sex, too. Who doesn’t? Who doesn’t? Yeah, we talked a lot about spanking beef or whatever. Whee! There it is, wait, wait for it, wait for it. There we have it. Courtney, we have made not one, not three, not four, but- Two! Two Sloppy Joes today. One kinda like normal, like Manwich-y. And then one inspired by ramen, which is Courtney’s favorite food other than Sloppy Joes and also all the other foods that she loves. All right, Courtney. Holy crap, we got our ramen-inspired Sloppy Joe. You ready to do it? I don’t think you understand how ready I am for this. I’m so excited. Wait, flip it. Just flip it and give it like a little punch. But the egg did a nice job of kind of cooling it down. I’m gonna try and get to the egg in the center in one bite. That’s very important to me that I do this. I’m gonna try, too. Yeah? All right. Ready? 3, 2, 1. 3, 2. I ate the whole egg. Oh my God. Ah, Kelly Clarkson! That’s everything good about ramen. And you’re definitely keeping the sloppy in Sloppy Joe. I’m so into this. And it’s pretty easy, right? It’s just easy as the other one we did. Yeah. But more funner. And that’s the magic of cooking. Do you feel like you experienced the magic of cooking? Oh, 100%. Like I feel like I’ve ascended. You’re on a different astrol plane. You’re like one of those people that buys crystals and like- Yeah, except for instead of crystals, it’s salt rocks. Yeah, wait, really? Wait, not, but not like the kind they put like on a lamp. It’s like salt to like cook with. I was trying to make a cooking joke. Oh, you can try it again. Yeah, but instead of crystals, I bring home spices. That’s another, that’s cooking. Let’s do it one more time. Give her one more alt. Except we’re buying crystals instead of buying rose quartz, I buy salt. Cooking, got ’em! Courtney, thank you so much for joining me. This was really fun. Next time, Trevor can get out of the bad place that we locked him in a closet. We’ll hang out. We’ll hang out. You’ll hang out. Are you gonna pack this up so I can take it home? No, we need to still shoot thumbnails. And by that time, it’ll have been at room temp for about four hours so it’s not food safe anymore. So it’s dangerous. You know, the only time I got food poisoning here was from a Smosh burrito? There were breakfast burritos. Hold on, just real quick, Joey, there were breakfast burritos out there and like one of the PAs for Smosh was like, “hey, do you want a breakfast burrito?” And I was like, “sure, how long have they like been out?” And they were like, “I don’t know, not too long.” And I did the math and turns out they were sitting out for about five and a half hours and I got like food poisoning. All right. Thank you all so much for stopping by the Mythical Kitchen. Courtney, where can they find you? Oh, please go check out Smosh, Smosh is doing all kinds of really fun stuff on the Smosh main channel. Smosh Pit, Smosh Games. And if you wanna follow me on Instagram and Twitter, I’m @co_mill. Posts really great content. A lot of ramen pictures. Also, find us on Instagram @mythicalkitchen, on TikTok. Tag us under hashtag , just like Courtney O’Keefe did when she made habasage bites. Different Courtney, not everything’s about you. And her toddler started chanting “habasage”, which apparently a lot of toddlers started chanting “habasage” after that video. So I’m sorry for turning your little children into mini vocal terrorists around your own home, but I’m also not. See ya next time. Oh no, I use the bread. I use the bread, I use the bread. Let me be myself. You sloppy son of a biscuit! Get as messy as you want in your own kitchen when you have the Mythical Kitchen towels, available now at mythical.com.