Oh, art. I’m sorry. Art, Josh, “ort”. For questioning– what is “ort”? Ort… Hallo, my name is Ort. What up? It’s your boy Josh, AKA The Guzzler, AKA Fire Fingers, AKA hefty, hefty, hefty, wimpy, wimpy, wimpy, hefty, hefty, hefty. And it’s that time again. Time to take two iconic snacks. Smash ’em toge– Damn it, I missed my finger hole. Two iconic snacks, smash ’em together. See if we can create a beautiful snack baby. We asked you which two snacks you wanted to see smashed together, and you said: Fruity Pe– Fruity Pe– DiGiorno and Fruity Pebbles! Will the snack be a smash? Find out! Cause this is… Snack Smash! V, you ready to have your mind blown right now? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, I thought you were gonna feed me… Oh, were you? No, no. Do it, do it, do it, I thought you were gonna do it, do it! feed me Fruity Pebbles! Do it. This is how I make it. Oh my God, sorry! We have to taste what this Fruity Pebbles/DiGiorno That’s good. rising crust pizza is gonna taste like. Okay. So, grab a slice. Let’s just try and get the flavor profile. Get the textures going. I love Fruity Pebbles, though, I think they are the most overrepresented cereal in media. And we are contributing to the problem. These are not two smells that I’ve ever experienced together, except maybe after, like, a late night out drinking, and you kind of have too much and it’s in the toilet bowl. Okay, that’s really good in a way that I did not expect. Yeah, that’s really good. You got, got a little… Why does this taste good? It’s so good. I forgot what DiGiorno tastes like to be honest. Pepperoni? Get the hell outta here. Fruity Pebbles are going on your pizza next. I love DiGiorno pizza! Shhh! So we’re gonna make a dough that has Fruity Pebbles in it, which is this. This is the color of all… We have made Fruity Pebble Pebbles, if you will. We ground up a bunch of Fruity Pebbles. We’re gonna add that directly to our dough. We’re gonna do a lot more though, because this is something that I could actually see coming out from the, the DiGiorno family. A proud Italian family, not mob affiliated. Despite what you might think. That’s a stereotype and it’s harmful. This is something that could exist, and I think they would really blow it out. So we’re gonna do a couple things to it. One hundred percent. We’re gonna create the dough right now. Okay. So we’re gonna add double zero flour which is a fine ground flour. We’re trying to get that, like, real signature DiGiorno chewy texture. That’s what it’s gonna separate this from a bread dough. And I’m adding the yeast in the olive oil? Yeah. Blending the yeast with the olive oil. We’re using an enriched flour that has dough conditioner in it. So that’s, like, someone just like edit in a bunch of chemical names. I’ll just mouth, I’ll do mouth. I’ll be like, We’re adding ground fruity pebbles to our flours right here. We’re also gonna add some salt. We’re gonna let this, we’re gonna need you to let this rest for about four hours, there, V! All right, we got the dry ingredients mixed up. We’re just gonna add our wets. Oh yeah. Soak it. All right. So we’re just gonna let this knead on the dough hook. We’re gonna take it out and actually knead it with our hands. Hold on. Just gotta get some flour. Yeah. Hold on. Nope. Now I’m just fighting with it. Hyah, back! Relax man. It’s not gonna smack you back. It’s just dough. I know, I’m just, I’m trying to, well, I’m trying to fold in the flour. I always get scared to do that. I think my finger’s gonna get caught on the hook. Yeah, don’t play around with industrial machinery. Unless you really want to. All right. We’re gonna let this need for like, what, like five minutes? Then we’re gonna take it out and knead it with our hands? I’m ready. What? Just, oh, I’m so sticky from everything. Josh, the dough looks like the same color as the liver or a body part. I feel like this is what my liver looks like after drinking a bunch of Mountain Dew and Jagers, which is my favorite drink. I’m sorry, what? I was gonna ask you who you think is hotter. Dang, neither of ’em have a beard, so. Why were they clean shaven? Yeah. What’d they shave with? They had to drive their cars by simply running around and hoisting them on their shoulders. What? They had a blade sharpened up to shave? This makes no sense, Flintstones. I would like to know the rate of circumcision for the Flintstonians. I just wanna know where that happened. ‘Cause if they’re shaving, they obviously have sharp tools. I don’t know. I just wanna know about their genital hygiene. Nah, probably shouldn’t use that one. But that’s the first thing that came to mind. We want this pizza to eat like a bowl of cereal. I’m gonna try and create the– We want the pizza to eat a bowl of cereal? No, we want the pizza to eat, like, eat like a bowl of cereal. Like when you eat the pizza, you want to have the same experience you would have at bowl of cereal. I know man, I’m just Joshing. You always give me guff! Well, I don’t know who that is. Who’s that? Is he a character in the Flintstones? Probably got a cousin named Guff. He’s German, isn’t he. Ja, hallo Guff. What do you do? You’re making a milk sauce. I’m gonna make a milk sauce which is basically a little mini roux, some milk, some condensed milk, and some salt. Does a salt have a smell to you? Mmm. Yeah. All right, we have our crust, this crust, dude, feel, feel this diseased liver. It’s tender. It’s nice. I think the Fruity Pebbles. It was that Mountain Dew, man. Maybe stop. Okay. Stop fingering it. I’m not! I’m pinking it. I’m gonna press this out. I’m gonna try and develop what pizzaiolos call a cornetto on this. I’m trying to get like, Cornetto. a solid pronounced crust. I’m gonna sprinkle a bunch of cornmeal. Okay. Onto our pizza block right here. I’m just meltin’ butter. ‘Cause my pan’s not that hot. Yeah. You’re good man, you’re good. No, just throw in the flour, like, forget it? Because I like to wing sauce a lot. Eyeball it. I thought you meant, I thought you meant, you like wing sauce. I do also like wing sauce. Particularly lemon pepper or buffalo. Yeah. Get that lemon pepper wet. Yeah. Ooh, you know about the lemon pepper wet. So, I’m trying to stretch this dough out a little bit. V’s strong with the pinkies. But I’m quick with the thumbs, if you know what I mean. I don’t know what I mean. I don’t, no. What? I’m not even gonna acknowledge that. Yeah, probably not. Imma just keep going. We should probably cut all this outta the video, right? No! What if the video is just like 30 seconds? We’re having a good time! Okay. That tastes good. In a way that I did not expect. The dough is really coming together nicely and I’m trying to really force this crust. We’re pressing out, we don’t need to roll it out. My milk’s coming together. It’s just milk right now, but it’ll come together. This is good. I’m gonna dock the dome. I’m just gonna do it with a fork. Yeah, do it. Yeah, yeah. Add some. Add some oomph to the sides. What do you mean? Add some oomph to the side? Add oomph. I’m oomphing it. I’m oomphing it. Why aren’t you oomphing it? You’re over here talking about, Oomph some sauce. I don’t see you on, I’m I mean, dough. trying to oomph! I need a you got a spoon? Can I use your fork real quick? Yeah. Use my fork. Here, I’ll dock with this. I use the back. This is kind of working. Ah, this is really working. So we’re docking this dough. That means we’re creating little air pockets right here so it doesn’t rise up. Okay. I need that back. All right, cool. So we’re docking the dough. So that means we’re creating little air pockets. So this doesn’t rise up in there. So it stays nice and flat. Got a crust developing. I’m gonna do one more oomph fast. I’m gonna put some oomph into it. Oomph. Put more oomph in it. I also have a cousin named Oomph. How’s it spelled? Ja, hallo, Guff und Oomph. Our sauce is saucing. So we’re looking good. Just gonna let it simmer a little bit. Awesome. It’s gonna reduce a little bit. We got this dough docked, I kind of mashed the docking holes out, whatever. Okay. It’ll be fine. I’m gonna bake this off. We’re gonna blind bake this because we’re working with so much sugar. We’re creating this Fruity Pebbles pizza. I wanna do a nice like Fruity Pebbles crust around the ring here. And then we’re gonna need to kind of bake this in stages. ‘Cause otherwise the Fruity Pebbles will burn. So I’m gonna blind bake this crust off real quick just so we have a nice base to work with. I’m ready. You want me to pinky it? Looking good, yeah, pinky it. It’s thi-ick! He needs some milk! You need more milk? Sauce. Sauce? Oh. What are you saying? I’m saying I need milk sauce. Okay. No, that’s good though. All right, check back in a sec. V, why do you look like you’re artificially inseminating a horse with that glove on? That’s oddly specific. Anyways, I’m decorating cheese. That’s exciting. So we, we’ve dyed a bunch of cheese. We got mozzarella cheese here. We just added food dye, and a bunch of it. Cause we got all the Fruity Pebble flavor going on in that crust. We got all the milk flavor in our sauce right here. Yeah, I’m gonna go ahead. This just looks like Alfredo sauce, man. It is. Should have made Fruity Pebble-cini al milko. I, dang, that sounds good actually. Doesn’t it? We should do that next time. We bought a hundred bonobos to work a factory. We own those now. Here you go. That’s all I’m saying. That’s all I’m saying. I saw baboons. I don’t know what you’re talking about. And the what? You didn’t see their butts? No, no, no, baboons are too expensive. No, we painted the bonobos’ butts blue. Painting the bonobo buts blue was an issue because we couldn’t use our bonobo labor to paint the bonobo butts. So we had to get capuchin monkeys. It’s like if there’s a rat in your house, you get a cat to catch the rat, but then you gotta get a dog to catch the cat and then you gotta get a horse to eat the dog. It’s just a real problem. You know what? The baboons are our therapists, okay? Have you seen Lion King? Baboons are the HR. Yeah. Yeah. We hired baboons as the HR for the bonobos. I like them. Lot of infighting, lot of drama about who gets cigarette breaks more often. You’d have to watch a previous episode to know why we’re talking about bonobos smoking cigarettes. So we’ll link to it down there so that way you can be caught up on all of our monkey business. So Vianai Austin is really inspired by the fauvist movement, now, the fauvist Edward Monet being the most popular, of course. Really inspired by bright colors. So you see the color pattern she’s painting with right? It’s really more of a modern critique on capitalism though. And how all of pre-packaged goods really just run together to form one entity. That is why she’s playing on the motif of Fruity Pebbles and pizza. It really could have been anything, much like Andy Warhol’s Campbell’s soup montage. We see her dotting them around. The repetition is really what reminds us of the fact that we do in fact I could be an art critic! That’s so easy, they just say stuff. Oh, if I was an art critic, I would be merciless. I would just wake up, burn my coffee, get extra pissed off, just, I don’t know. Listen to a bunch of sad music and go to a museum, and just take the hopes and dreams of every young starving artist, and just crush them into the palm of my hand. I would just put out lit cigarettes on their paintings, and spit on them. I would be cruel. That looks really nice. You like this? Should we go a little bit more on the edges? Oh, I was trying to leave the cereal– No, it’ll bleed out on the edge. The cereal effect. Because you always see white on the outside. Hello, art. Art, Josh, “ort”. I’m sorry. For questioning– what is “ort”? Ort… Hallo, my name is Ort. All right, we’re gonna bake this off. Let the cheese melt. And then we have one final move. We’re gonna actually edge the crust here. Big on edging in the Mythical Kitchen. Yes, we are. With Fruity Pebbles. Well, the pizza’s out of the oven. The cheese is melted. I can’t… That’s not cheese, that’s Fruity Pebbles. Can’t tell if this is the smartest or the dumbest thing we’ve ever made. Sometimes they’re two sides of the same coin. Like Albert Einstein would forget to wear pants sometimes. Ooh. But then he, he also made the nuclear bomb. All right, so here, here’s what’s gonna happen. I’m gonna paint around the crust. We have just like a thick batter here. Cause we need something to stick the Fruity Pebbles to the crust. I have a lot of food blue dye on my hand, and I’m really sorry. It did not come off when I washed it. Okay, so, eh, that’s fine. So here take Fruity Pebbles. And, just try and stick ’em to this batter on the crust right here. But try and not get it on the cheese. Yeah, yeah. Really? Oh, I got it in the cheese. There was, there was an artist who just put a canvas on the ground and he would just dip naked people into paint, and he’d just swing ’em around. Wait, that’s really funny. I wanna do that. Tell ‘im to hire me. I wanna be one of the naked people, man. Have you ever been a nude model? Do you think I have? No, man. Have you? Yeah, you look like you have. Is that a common thing? I would love to. If anybody wants to paint me naked, you don’t even have to be a painter. You don’t even have to paint me. You just have to sit there. I think my nude painting would look great in a sort of cubist form. Not quite Picasso era, but I’m thinking more as contemporary George Brock. I think Picasso went a little too abstract with a lot of his human forms in cubism, where I think Brock really kept a certain amount of tightness and rigidity, which that’s the whole idea of cubism, right? Is the mind sort of creating representations in geometry and then fusing that into real life. And, and also, I wanna have big old square beanbags. That wasn’t it Josh. We’re gonna spend the next 30 to 90 minutes painting and then applying Fruity Pebbles to this crust. But again, a bonobo can do this in 10, easy, especially if they’re hopped up on nicotine. So we’re gonna pop this in the oven, but once that’s done, V, you know what we got? What do we got? We got the p-p-p-packaging! Oh, dang, man! So sorry. You okay? No, you spit in my hair. Vianai Celeste Austin, Nicole Miriam Enayati. Are you ready to eat this Fruity Pebbles pizza. I am! This is the best pizza party ever! Don’t touch me, you’re sticky. Family dinner! Alright, let me carve this up. What are your first impressions based on look? It looks like a unicorn and a pinata and a clown had a threesome and then they all threw up afterwards. I don’t even like clowns, guys. It’s one of my fears actually. You’re scared of clowns? Yeah. I always learn new stuff about you. Some people have a phobia of clowns. I have a philia of clowns. You’re a sicko. Wow, look at that cheese! It’s a good pizza. Like, it’s crusty on the bottom. Also, the first DiGiorno pizza to ever look like the pizza on the box. Wow. Look at that. Pretty legit. High-res! I am cautiously optimistic. Is this supposed to be sweet or savory? Yes. Probably both. My brain and my taste buds are confused. Let me get some crust. It’s a lot of a lot. and I don’t… You love it? I love it! You love it? Yeah! It’s weird, but I like it! So much that I’m not gonna take a second bite. I can’t. It’s confusing. Because the texture of the sauce, it is very milky. I mean it’s basically milk and sugar. If we thought it would taste like a bowl of cereal, I don’t know that we’ve exactly achieved that. That is something. It’s a blanket. Oh, what you mean? You can, just put your face here and cover it, and it’s a blanket for your face. Tastes like cream of wheat. Yeah? Dude. Yeah, tastes like cream of wheat. It is very salty, though. Speaking of sweet or savory, what do you think this is? Yes. Right? That’s what I’m saying. Yes. But it’s almost not both. It’s kind of neither. This exists in a third fugue state. Like a Schrodinger’s cat. Neither dead nor alive, but somehow both at the same time. That’s what this pizza is. Is it dessert? Is it a main course? I don’t know. All I know is it’s not delivery mother– I consider myself a really decisive person. It stays, Nicole, it stays. Got it. And I don’t know wherever this lands is what I’m gonna defend. In 3, 2, 1. Blindly, I’m saying. It does not! This is a pass. Are you guys smashing? Nicole’s passing. I’m smashing! No way, V! I don’t even like– Explain thyself. Explain thyself. Okay, as a not even fully Fruity Pebbles fan. I kind of like all the textures in my mouth when I first bit it. And, I just like warm milk? Even though I don’t drink a lot of milk? But I don’t know, I just really enjoyed that first bite. I’m not gonna lie. I have never been like, less impressed or more upset. I’m gonna flip this to smash. Yeah! Not just to spite Nicole, but because, very specifically, I believe that humans are not their thoughts. Humans are their actions. I am a pure behavioralist. I picked this up, without even thinking about it, to take another bite. So there’s something that draws me back. Whether it is disgust, It’s the colors! whether it is disgust or delight. That doesn’t matter. Nicole, the colors exist they’re there. It’s the warmth! It hits right here. It’s warm. Like you said, it almost tastes like nothing. Right? Exactly. That’s why it passes! It’s all, it’s just food dye That’s why it passes! no, but there’s something, it’s a plain cheese pizza. But it’s confusing the mind and the senses in the way that a poisoned dart frog does before it kills its prey. God dang. I love this pizza! No don’t. You compare pizza to a frog? Do you love this pizza? Like, love it? I don’t love it, but I would smash it. Mm. And that’s what love’s about. Well, thank you all so much for being here today, and thank you so much for supporting all the content in 2022. ‘Cause this is our last upload, y’all, last video of the year. This is our last video? Okay, another hug, another pizza party hug! Don’t touch me. We’ll come out with new videos on January 10th. In the meantime though, go back and watch some old favorites, like we got, Nicole, you so comfy. go back and watch Oregon Trail, Meals of History, where Emily plays Benjamin Buttons. Ben Buttons! Benny Buttons. What are your favorite episodes you think they should watch? My favorite episode is whenever we, what’s the thing that we did? My favorite episode is, is the guy with the glasses and the girl with the curly hair. You sound like you’ve never watched the show. Point is, thank you all so much for everything throughout this year. We would be nothing without you. We are absolutely honored that of all the content creators, you have inexplicably chosen us bunch of weirdos, guzzling down food dye out here. But truly, thank you, and see y’all in the next year. You get a smash. And you get a smash. You get a smash! Watch out, V’s trying to smash. The mythical kitchen’s favorite way to obliterate garlic, immortalized in t-shirt form. Get the palm heel strike tee now at mythical.com.