put your shoulders by Liz put your neck up and and turn it while that pilot light pop boy you’re cut a piece of paper where that Adam’s apple is I think you need to see a doctor over that thing deep in the cavern of Forgotten Dreams a single drop of draw from a hungry man who was about to begin a hotdog eating contest fell into the secret center of the inevitable goo germinating the berry of new beginnings and subsequently conceiving the mythical show with rhett and Link on this week’s show Taylor Swift a caption fail this is science with rusty and arnold june holidays in a hot tub with thomas lemon a special birthday song for link and now get on rit and me welcome to the mythical show your half hour of not having to click around on the internet i made a purchase recently i want to discuss it with you and the mythical beasts first of all II I’m going on record you’d like to make purchases I don’t even think it matters what it is I just think something about your personality I can saw myself with shopping yeah because you’re such a sad human being you’re not sad I know my wife right my wife was I don’t tell yourself my wife was out of town it was boy we call it boy time that’s me my two boys okay it’s boy time I need to console myself boys I’m gonna buy a bike no they needed a bike Shepherd needed a bike lock needed a bike I wanted a bike cuz I have a mountain bike but you don’t ride because your back is messed up right so I was like I need a street bike so I got a street bike like a motorcycle get a picture of it for you right here this is a neon suil bike I chose those wheels they said you can have any color wheel you want I was like give me the neon green ones I was going to go ahead and met any of you that are in this fixed gear bike inking have brakes I have not only do I have brakes I have front and back brakes I have it set up as a freewheel bike because I wouldn’t know what to do if it just kept going so you’re in out wear a helmet what sue me so you’re a poser the way you’re supposed to do it then you’ve got one of these it’s the you’re supposed to break with the gears there’s not supposed to be any breaks mm-hmm and so you’re going to guess that you’re not supposed to wear a helmet either well all the cool kids don’t wear helmets they were where they all wear helmet and they were like flip-flops they don’t have brakes I’m not gonna do that I’ve got like on high tops I’ve got the helmet you weren’t like basketballs yeah just so my ankles don’t get caught up in the chain you’re joking you don’t have any high tops I’m sure you look awesome but look at that giant on the bike with the neon wheels that my helmet had a cover on it and then the cover came off so now I just have the styrofoam pipe which is kind of hipster you know if my hipster were to wear a helmet to go with that bike it would be a just ass tire it would be it’s like we’re in a cooler oh that’s what I thought like one of those cheap coolers you can get at the convenience store well that’s what I thought but luck was like that I don’t want to go out with you with that thing on like some two nine years old this doesn’t want to be so you can see the straps come around my neck around my face and then they go up and then they come out on the top of the helmet like you can see where the straps are strapped to the top of the helmet and it’s just styrofoam I thought it looks pretty cool so it looks like can I see a picture of this right now yep oh here’s a picture of it Jessie was like I need some raspberry liqueur for this recipe I’m doing for the sauce I’m putting on this thing and I was like well let me go get that for you now put on my helmet and my backpack Oh see you’re not constantly wearing the helmet just around the house and I and I was like a courier what do you call this guy’s a courier yeah I was like a courier and I got out on the four-lane highway Van Nuys Boulevard and I’m in traffic I’m just making that noise with your mouth yeah look at the dude with the cooler on his head making the bike noises with his mouth as he pedals and I gotta admit this is the first time I’ve ever done this I’ve never actually been in traffic on a bicycle I mean I was like I got up to a road ride to take a left and I was like what am I supposed to do I know it’s tempted to just go to the side and wait for the light to change and then go across like a pedestrian but I’m supposed to be a car I was like screw this I’m gonna get in the left lane and I was the first guy in the left lane when my backpack in my helmet my green wheeled bicycle and then I started getting kind of self-conscious at that point oh really I was like and I was like home let me get my feet right so when it turns green I can go and then I turned green and I start going and I start honking at me yeah what here but this is not but you’re not a car dude I know but I’m doing what by Sigler’s are supposed to do I’m acting like a car did you turn around and give him my full give on them I flipped on the bird a symbol no I didn’t flip him the bird I was like okay I said okay I’m learning I’m new to this well yeah I mean it’s I imagine it would be scary I just stick to like mountain bike trails and stuff like that yeah because I have encountered bicyclists and been I know that you’ve told me about this too you’ll be driving around and they’ll be like someone like someone coming by and you think they’re going to pull out and you do this is that they will the pedestrian or the bicyclists will see that you’re about to pull on hit you the car driver yeah and they will hit the top of the car yeah that’s what I do last week Christy was pull out of the grocery store she was looking left and somebody was going by on a bike and they knew that she was gonna pull out and they the top of her car and started yelling at her I’m gonna start doing that that’s what you got to have that much confidence take that styrofoam Helen off and just like throw at it like a woman in her minivan okay hey I don’t think I should get rid of your helmet I think watch it like I can reach all right let’s keep this show moving what are we doing next caption fail yeah time for another caption fail this time with Taylor Swift songs oh yeah we sing some of Taylor Swift’s most popular songs and let YouTube’s automatic closed caption tool translate them these are the lyrics we got back also part-time due respects to go I was in your science you got me at all you fair homie you plan on me you been only the eee baby jump mistakes to me and armenia one is only i knew you were trouble when you walked in so machine mommy now how gloomy defeated and never pan now couple couple couple asking for action I swear teachers teach it captain and in a model bleachers period up to date when you wake up and find well they’re elected four days has been here the hometown that you to stream that I understand you prepare all of also arcane TC me along with me you’re a gnome with me something funny even in a pickle see and now you’re everyone I use Ernie you can mate when out of the company will continue somewhere we could be a problem operated all the stuff to do to run you’ll be depressing out in the process it’s a slow story baby suggests yes we caught up with the entire snag but ooh there’s ten and every year I’m giving we are never ever hearing in that me every ever never he to reinstall two man friends how the main runway are never ever ever ever hitting an Kidder’s enigma breakthrough technology yeah you can’t kick me off like that I was rapid-fire man a you ever seen bill bill Rider sighs man hello I’m Laurel Jernigan senior and I more or burfoot bodily secretions are not typically an acceptable topic of public conversation for fake bodily excretions totally fair game today we are going to concoct fake snot mucus nasal discharge but first it’s time to bring out our scientist in training what’s your name Cameron Cameron lip fish that’s good I like you vest man thanks what does it say about you which is it you’re a dapper young cow say that say well I’m a dapper young child I’m a dapper young job do you like science I always wanted to be a pilot and a scientist are you a plane man or a helicopter man plane man what you know what it’s smart to want to fly planes and that choppers why cousin Roy ain’t got a helicopter made out of a kid he died at the age of 38 God rest his soul not talked about I think he deserved it I said that at his funeral and asked me to speak I know I was embarrassed I walked out the back but I had a date I took her with me we went to Hardee’s got a chicken sandwich forgot all about the whole endeavor until you brought it up right now have you ever heard of snot yes what is it it’s lookers you eat it don’t you you decide that’s an ID yep you eat your own snot so do I do you want to make snot or not I want to mix it in sounds awesome right can you say it would more vicar I want to mix not I want to make snot you know what you say I want to make it’s not I want to make snow the thing I don’t understand is we’re dealing with a young man that eats its own snot but now we’re gonna make snot and we’re putting goggles on him well he doesn’t need it with his eyes does he that’s a good point I want you to put up in his glass of water here one third of the way stop you went too far all right listen if you want to be a pilot you got to learn about precision son don’t be like my cousin Roy he died in a helicopter crash all right son this is an important step we got gelatin you know what’s in gelatin he’s ground-up Kalen pig parts stir that up pilot listen here ace we gotta wait 20 to 30 minutes how many minutes do you think it’s been okay about well yes done you got a time warp you want to make up a song hmm you know any songs yeah we do it’s Friday night I know I know that that’s the best part anyway we’re gonna head to sugar which is corn syrup and this is real good for you but let’s lots of your snacks and stuff give it all you got that’s good right there here you go oh look at that camera does that look like anything is gonna come out of your head yes makes you hungry don’t it don’t you think you should eat come on I’m not a kid I’m not the one eats my own boogers sure I’m not the one who admitted yeah that was so bad was it you might say this is nasty but we might see this is sighs and I’d like to dedicate this episode to our late cousin what was his name Roy Roy yep I still believe he deserves to be dead this is for you Roy the mythical male Boulder widens this week we got among many other things tiny horses a zebra and a dog from KT and Urbana Ohio rhettandlink money man from Tyler in manila’s New York bacon soap from Sarah in Texas and glasses from Aaron in Ontario Canada want to mail us something visit facebook.com slash Breton link for more information thank you there’s a holiday for every day in the month of June now you could celebrate each holiday as it comes or you can do like we’re about to do and celebrate them all in one sitting back to back to back let’s go flip a coin day actually June 1st is also my birthday I got you a nickel national rocky road day hey it’s a good thing we still have this rocky road left over whom we celebrated my birthday like I 1 second ago I love like a little national repeat a national repeat day not gonna repeat that national repeat the national repeat day that’s no repeat that embarrassing Elmas day I have psoriasis and I have hemorrhoids let’s celebrate fly a kite day Oh dad I love having to spend time with you get your kite in the air son don’t ya disappoint me to get your kite in the air it’s hard yeah I knew we shouldn’t have adopted you national gardening exercise day whoa feel the burn of gardening but I’m gonna get a green bicep carne lovers day I didn’t know you loved accordions you don’t know everything about me best friends day then I want to let you know you are my best friend you’re like in my top five just kidding you’re in my top thirty this strawberry rhubarb pie day oh you know what I love a strawberry rhubarb pie ice tea day mmm boy they sure is hot out here I’m glad we got some ice tea that we can be drinking right about now watch now nap ha I love drinking tea with each other oh holiday rhubarb so deadly are they not laughter boo oh let me give you a hug what are the neighbors gonna think and that we shouldn’t be huggin bubbly is it hot I hear we spoon full of sugar day let go you can you can stop hugging me I try to sob oh let me take my medicine great oh I’m having trouble getting to go down I got something to help you go down juggling day oh man I gotta take the kids to school I had to do this laundry I gotta bake this pie I’m really glad it’s already done I get it world blood donor day wink I feel horrible about what not getting you very much for Christmas your birthday huh hold on oh I got you something I got you some blue oh my god I think I’m gonna faint yep national Hollerin contest day so big a big a big what happened we were doing the holidays all the holidays in June Father’s Day got our dads on speakerphone here hey dad wants you to know I love you and happy Father’s Day hey Dad I want to let you know that I love you more than rhett loves his dad uh sorry gotta go celebrate my holiday your vegetables day I’m gonna eat this welcome knock before you eat your vegetables go fish in a row the weather is beautiful oh yeah perfect day for fishing look you catch the fish you got this new Iran catch it I got one I really did hey guys it’s also international panic day eat an Oreo day oh you know I could really use right now some Oreos um it’s eat an Oreo okay ice cream so today Oh watch the Oreos there if you look like you got shocked look minute moaning eggses you come here often slice wedding day all right hi miss Irma got him soap microphone day islands in the stream that is what we are no one in between how can we be wrong group out early day you know I’m tired of this I’m gonna poop out early is that what that means I guess I’m so sad that red just pooped out early there’s only one thing that could cheer me up right now creamy praline a creamy pralines mmm so creamy and praline me blog have a day customers sometime out of the wilderness and I build a cabin a log cabin oh yeah let me see it check it out dude not quite what I expected mutations day while you were gone I got a degree in being a beautician is that right yeah that’s right you wrap that around your head let me put and then we put this on you when your lips this is real stupid take a look at yourself I look horrible sunglasses day you know wear these no one will ever recognize you great American backyard campout let’s go camping I love camping with you trolls s’more time jammer day we should capture this moment you did eat that so give us a madam give me some IP camera over here I want some of the marshmallow meteor day hmm move back darkening the Sun I don’t know is it an asteroid no asteroids don’t come to earth meteors come to earth nah I just caught it well be that’s a first not even hot and that’s all the holidays in June wow that was great you know him as lieutenant dangle from Reno 911 right and he’s also the writer of your favorite movies about Knights at museums night of the museum and we sat down with him in a hot tub Thomas Lennon oh yeah sorry I’m just just getting back into gum I was enjoying it right at the moment when you asked me how I was doing been away from gum away from gum for a little while I know what you’ve been doing breath spray sometimes oh really yeah yeah cut you if you make a low sound it goes deeper oh I really shouldn’t have done such a low note okay no I’m good yeah because I know your guys names but we remind me which ones with that’s Rhett yeah I’m Rhett I’m link you wanted I was hoping you had introduced me you want a pneumonic device just like watching cinematic so what kind of magnetic of us do you have for me to remember I think it will be a song will be the that’s how I memorize so you eat eat we need to sing our names shut up let me drop a beat for you okay 1989 he called well my name is Lynx I’m sitting tight keeping it warm and to my right is a guy his name is something else I’ll let him sing it so he can tell you what lowest note ever can I ask a super super weird question yes both wearing wigs or just one of you guess who so we’ve it’s extension to sponsor settings you can feel where they meet your hair yeah how many hours is it take to do it takes a full weekend you don’t do it in one sitting though you do it gradually oh I get my children to do it so can I have another hit of that bingo yeah that’s a really kind way of you – it’s the way about you to say not that you have bad breath up from the south no you think we sound like rednecks yes yeah that’s not that you don’t sound intelligent educated but you do sound like dudes who would make tourists into jerky in some insane Mississippi shack mountain chat now usually when you begin sweating like I am which is pretty profuse ly if your body is telling you that you’re giving yourself a fever right Yeah right so at what point do I begin actually cooking pretty soon pretty soon it’ll be too late by the time you really notice it it’ll probably be too late your family lost for you but then we can eat you I really love you guys yeah this has been real you know people have been like hostages somewhere had a same experience and it’s feel I kind of feel that so we should like stay in touch yeah yeah well a lot of times when you’ve been through a traumatic experience like that then you try to be friends afterwards you know doesn’t work out you know nothing we’re not even work out no better than we were chained up of that radiator right yeah so let’s just not talking let’s not I’m gonna go under if you guys walk right okay know what though I will follow you on Instagram maybe okay that’ll do that’s not good love it great thank you to Thomas Lennon for being on the show why don’t you tweet at him mythical beast tweet at him and thank him for being on the mythical show we are sincerely thankful listen last week we issued a challenge called the cicada challenge and I’m just gonna go ahead and say right now that ret issue we ret issued the challenge and none of you guys have responded yet and it must be because the cicadas aren’t out or I’m sure you would have been eating them in droves and making video responses it’s still not too late you should do that come on people if you don’t want to eat it just act like you’re eating it if you don’t act like you’re eating it just take a video of yourself like making a pet out of what I don’t know just do something come on work with us here do like a pseudo challenge for the cicada thingy you know happy birthday link thank you almost said happy birthday back you know how when someone says happy birthday happy birthday to you not my birthday but it is your birthday so one first I wrote you a song bring me a song and don’t read it I just wrote it yesterday and it took about five minutes so I don’t I don’t have it memorized I’m not to read it hope that doesn’t mean any less to you you got some rhubarb right there I’m glad that you’ve done this I think this is for my birthday never done this before thank you we been friends for 30 years and I’m not always the best at bringing your birthday cheer in fact most years I don’t even get you a gift well this year I’m giving you and also guitar riff that’s a guitar riff it also doubles as your birthday gift you like it thank you longer take it it also doubles as a guitar we heard that already you sang it earlier where no one second before you do the single no no I want to keep going this is like a Western it’s like a minor key western thing that could be a jingle for like dog food it’s not dark we been working together we see a lot of each other true you might say it’s almost like we’re brothers okay and just like family he with sometimes fight and I’ll admit that at least 10% of the time you are right bitch you didn’t practice the 35 yes I am i I admit it in that halfway 70 is evident when you guys ah 7:00 is when you die I got a second verse so live it up I think this is a third verse and who would you please cousin teen years you’re gonna have to replace both of your knees enjoy this here birthday song cuz in the overall scheme of things brother you don’t have long it you’re 35 and that’s half way to 77 is when you’ll die seven is when you’ll die it’s kind of depressing I want you to sing in first person it’s my birthday yeah I got the lyrics right there it’s my birthday I’m 35 it’s my birthday I’m 35 that’s it you start it’s my birthday I’m 35 yeah yeah 35 that’s half of silver and 70s when I got it’s more like this 70 yeah that’s that’s half 17 it would die ever knees when I’ll die every birthday thank you right it’s the it’s the thought that counts I mean you could have practiced it a little time I just wrote it in it I on a whim man let’s spin the mega wheel of mythicality and see me later about you this is how we end the episode sikita challenged people for my birthday angry customers at a restaurant Garcon can we get a little more rhubarb pie over here we’ve gone through two of them so we ordered four I didn’t order food with my salt hello well what I meant to say was I didn’t order food with my salt how should I have said that you’re no much salt on my food sarcastic remark here you’re not getting a tip didn’t order foo so we’re gonna poop out early I didn’t I would have liked some food with my salt I would have liked some food with my salt bodily excretions are not typically an acceptable topic of public conversation but fake bodily extractions totally fair game you’re supposed to ask me what I’m doing what are you doing taking like I’m important we’re gonna add it in post the main thing I’m saying is I don’t like you should fart throughout my life I know I think you should wait first place and fill it with a fart bodily excretions are not typically an acceptable topic of public conversation but that was not where you do it you wait for me to say but fake Bali expressions totally fair game I’m sorry I thought I was going to scatter one in there earlier scatter shot my buttholes like a shotgun bodily expressions are not typically an acceptable topic of public conversation but fake Bali excretions totally fair game I could actually do a real one over that would you boot your net again it would can you do it again it was just fate it’s the kind of thing that happens once like an angel angel passing gas bodily excretions are not typically an acceptable topic of public conversation but fake bodily secretions totally fair game what are you doing you gotta be you gotta be a little subtle about bodily expressions are not typically an acceptable topic of public conversation but fake bodily Cromley excretion are not typically an acceptable topic of public conversation fake bottle Lincoln Street shoes totally fair game still you’re alive boy professionalism has escaped us