I’m Chris Cotton. I’m here at VidCon. I’m gonna ask some people some hypothetical questions. They’re gonna tell me what they woulda did. I’m gonna tell them what I woulda did. This is What I Woulda Did. – Stop. You’re too old for this, I’m sorry. – You say I’m too old for this? – Yup. – Can I speak to your supervisor? – I’m the supervisor. – I guess we’ll be going somewhere else. (hip hop music) If you’re friend disappeared, what would you take from his house first? – Probably the dog, Bubba. – Oh, you’d go get his dog? – Yeah, ’cause I live with him. So, it’s like, I raised it too, so. – If my friend disappeared, first thing I’m getting from the house, is I’m getting the computer, and I’m deleting erry-thing. ‘Cause that’s my friend. I know my friend. Any of them. What would you do if someone gets too excited while you’re telling them sex information? – Like, a little like, you could tell, like it starts to pop? – Excited, just oop. – I would assume that that person would probably be mortified, so I wouldn’t call attention to it. Eyes up here. – What I woulda did, I would just start talkin’ about worst case scenario penises. – Oh. – You know, you know what I mean? Like, when like, if they have something, and like, start describing like, “Now with “chlamydia, what happens is, if you “let it go on for 19 years.” What would you do if you found a unicorn pony? – How thick are the legs of this pony? I think I’d, if I could ride it, but I would need to look at the legs closely. – Oh, you’re gon’ get in there, you’re gonna, if he lets you, you know what I mean? Or if he, she– – Now, are you, milk it? – What are you grabbing there? – That’s just the legs, I think. I think I’m grabbing the legs. – You’re milking a unicorn pony. – Do you think the milk would be good? – It’s like Skittle milk. Have you ever, have you ever put Skittles in milk? – What would you do if you spoke in Autotune, but rapped and sung in a normal voice? – I would probably do a lot of texting. (Chris laughs) Or you know. (laughs) – Do you think people would think you’re in The Matrix? – In the Ma-, well, (laughs). I’m tryin’ to get the connection from the voice to The Matrix. – I don’t know, it’s computer stuff. What would you do if you start laughing too hard at a joke told by a non-friend? You know, that one dude on the side who just keep laughing too hard, like? – Yeah. – Oh, you gotta start roasting him. – Yeah yeah, yeah yeah. – Whatchu laughin’ at? – You gotta have this hand, right here. – I gotta? – Yeah it’s – Whatchu laughin’ at? – It’s fired down. It’s what– – You do? We always say, “(beep) outta here,” and then you come up. I don’t know you. But them sneaks, though. And then you go away. – So you’re establishing. – I’m already hurt. – You’re establishing territory, you gotta, no, I get it. – Oh, yeah. You gotta flare up, you gotta chest out on ’em. – Chest out, arm up. – You’re a compound roaster. – What would you do if in your videos, you couldn’t add a dramatic noise? (dramatic horns) What do you do if the government gave black people reparations, but it was literally, three acres and a mule? – Well I would build a house. – [Chris] You would build a house on your acres. – I would start my own compound, and I would start preparing for the end of the world. – Okay, because you know if they gave back the reparations, things– – Things are already down the drain. Like, it’s already, we’re already going there. – The Space Force done launched, baby. – Yeah. – Listen, in this video, we’re gonna find one gem. It’s all edited. They call me, fix-it-in-post Chris.