Welcome to “Ear Biscuits”, the podcast. Where two lifelong friends talk about life for a long time. I’m Link. And I’m Rhett. This week at the round table of dim lighting, we are listening to your voicemails that you left at ♪ 1-888-EARPOD1 ♪ ♪ One, one, one ♪ Answering the question, or completing the sentence- I said “one” three times, which I guess was confusing. But if you dial extra numbers- Well yeah, then you just get the extension 11, which is us. I could not have survived my teenage years without, fill in the blank. Boop! Boy. Boy, boy, boy, boy, boy, boy, boy, boy, boy, boy. Boy? Is that all you gotta say? You thought I was gonna start talking? Boy. Boy. Well, no, I was just thinking about what I couldn’t have survived. My… And actually, you know what? We got a lot of answers that were in the, when I think about my teenage years and what I couldn’t have survived without, I think about, uh, whacking off. Okay, right. And I’m just saying that apparently many of you also agree with that because I would say that more than 50% of the answers were people talking about masturbation. No. They’re, no, they weren’t. Yeah, they were. Oh really? Yeah. No, they weren’t. Am I right? They were. Yes. Oh, they were? Yeah. I’m not, this is not a joke. Oh. This is based on knowledge that I have about all the calls that were made. Over half? Just about. Which is a good amount. I mean, I’m saying over 50% of you- Well, you know what? Know thy self. said that you could not have gotten through your teenage years without masturbating. Do you think? Okay. And you know what? I’m right there with you. So we’re not gonna talk about that, other than right now. We’re getting it out of our system. That’s it. That’s all the masturbation talk. That’s kind of what it is, isn’t it? Getting it outta your system? Well, it’s- It doesn’t really work that way, though. It seems to always be ready to go again at some point. Yeah. It’s this is a. I mean, there is a reset period, but- It depends on how old you are. Oh, really? The older you get, the longer the reset period gets. I mean, I do recall when I was, when I was really, making it into an art form that I- Testing the limits? I would, I challenged myself. Mm hmm. Just to see what would happen. We didn’t, we don’t have to talk about this now. Oh, okay. We don’t have to. You’re the one who brought it up. No, they brought it up. And we didn’t select any of those? No. We’re not- so we decided, Yeah, we can talk about it now. We decided not to talk about it. Except now. I didn’t even know we didn’t even select those. Yeah, I know. I was trying to keep it from you. You called them. I didn’t think your ears were ready for it. I know it makes you uncomfortable. I mean, I think I could have survived without it, but I mean- Uh. The thing that I, if I had to do it multiple times, just string ’em together, that’s what I couldn’t have survived. Cause that’s, that’s a lot of work. That takes a lot. I don’t understand. I lost, I lost the plot. Don’t make me say it. If you, if you wanna string them together, like rapid succession, when I was testing the limits of- Mm hmm. It’s just, that’s a lot of work. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. You’re still lost? It gets where it’s almost not enjoyable. Oh, okay. It’s almost like a duty. Right. Mm hmm. It’s like, you’re just a donor. Right, yeah. I gotta get paid. . Oh man. If we keep this up, this would be like me and my Dad’s podcast. Yeah. I heard it’s really dirty. He’s a dirty boy. I egg him on, you know, it’s fun. We’re having a good time over there. Speaking of having a good time, I am excited about listening to these voicemails and I just like it. I’m also, I like have a good time. Mm hmm. I like have a good time. Is that what I said? I like have a good time. And the best time that I’ve ever had on the internet was Good Mythical Evening. Well, that was really, that was why I was talking about, I went ahead and just broke the seal and started talking about masturbation. It had nothing to do with Good Mythical Evening. Well, but it’s the kind of thing we would talk about out there. It’s an adult thing. We’d talk about it there and we would probably, we would use- No. more explicit language. Okay. Sure. Yeah, we would. Because it’s an R-rated version of Good Mythical Morning, I gotta say. If you were there for it. It made waves last year. Then you know you wanna be there for it again, ’cause we’re doing it Thursday, September 1st. All right? We’re doing it that evening. For one night only, ticketed event, exclusively on Moment House. That’s the provider. Don’t get too worked up. Yeah, yeah. Grab your tickets at goodmythicalevening.com, Friday. Or if you’re a Mythical Society member, you can get it Wednesday. Yeah, those society members, they’re always getting things early. They’re early. But yeah. Good Mythical Evening. I’m, it’s September 1st, like I said, so I’m already gearing up for it. Yeah. You gotta make plans for it. Yeah. You gotta save up. I’m gonna challenge myself this year. In what way? See how many I can string together. How many Good Mythical Evenings. Oh, okay. Okay, I understand. I only did one evening, last time. I’m gonna cram two evenings into one this year. Ay, ay, ay. I’m, I don’t know if I’m prepared for that. Yeah, if you, if you don’t know, last year Link- Had fun. he got a little carried away. We knew that we were going to be taking some shots to get ready, but we underestimated how much of a lightweight he is. And as soon as he started talking, I was like, “Whoa, okay.” I thought this was gonna be like a progressive evolution over the course of the night. But it was just like, “No, no, no.” Bam! Out of the can. Yeah, yeah. We are starting full on. So I just basically have made a commitment that I’m, that I’m gonna be right there with you, this time. Boom. So now that I know what to expect- Stevie’s not listening to this, so. poor, poor Stevie. Poor Stevie. She’s gonna be the one to have to keep us on track. She was petrified. She was petrified last year. A lot of people watching were petrified. Yeah. It was fun. It was fun. And it’s more fun if you’re there. Let’s- Go to mythicalevening.com. Mm hmm. Let’s listen to a response. Am I playing these? Well, you’ve got the computer. Okay. Hi Rhett and Link. My name is Kat. I could not have survived my teenage years without the lunches that my Mom packed for me. Specifically, I had braces for a very long time. Okay. So my teeth were always sore and she would always make me ramen in a thermos and the noodles would soak up all the liquid. Oh yes. And every time I opened the thermos it looked like a brain, so- Ew. I guess I couldn’t have survived my teenage years without ramen that looked like a brain. Thank you. You’re welcome, Kat. What a pleasant voice that Kat’s got. She could be in radio. Could be in radio? Could be in podcasting, right? Welcome to the future. No, no, no, no. The radio standard is a little bit about above podcasting. Did your Mom ever pack you ramen in a thermos? I like to go into a bit of a radio voice, from time to time, but I gotta tell you, that I do think that a podcast voice is a little bit more suited to what we’re doing right now, but I am full ron ready. To go radio? To go radio if I have to. Don’t do it. I’ll do it in a heartbeat. I would love to have a late-night show where I was talking to people about aliens and weird and stuff like that. Like Coast to Coast. Coast to Coast, too. I might do that in my old, in my old days, in my elder times, where you just sit there and you listen to people and you give them the benefit of the doubt. You don’t question them. You never question where they’re talking about, you just egg them on. Right. And you just have a crazy old conversation. I love that idea. I love it too. You’re invited. Oh, okay. I’m working on it. You’re working on it? I’ll work on it. Huh. Who’s doing Coast to Coast now? It’s still happening. And in fact I was listening, first of all, just so you know, we’re gonna have to do a podcast about aliens before long, because- Well, they’re gonna arrive. we just keep talking about it so much. And we haven’t even let the Mythical beasts in on the fact that, there’s lots of alien talk that’s been happening around here in between us and amongst friends. Mm hmm. And you know, my days of extreme skepticism about that, well, I’m still a skeptic, but you know, I don’t know, maybe LA’s finally getting to me, but we gotta talk about it before long man. And anyway, I was listening to a podcast, where they were talking about aliens, which there’s a few of them. Mm. We won’t be breaking any new ground. Nope. And the guy was talking about Coast to Coast and he was talking and he was saying that like, “Yeah, you were on Coast to Coast.” And he was like, “Yeah. With, with the, with the, with the, with the, with the, you know, the old boy-” What’s his name? whatever his name is. Coast to Coast host. He’s still doing, you said “hosta”. “Coast to Coast hosta”. So you just… Uh, Jim? George Noory. Yeah, George Noory, yeah. He’s still doing it. From 1988 until now. He’s still doing it. George Noory. George Noory, I can’t really, I don’t, I can’t do an impersonation, but he does take everyone very seriously. That’s his schtick, I love it. Look at what Kat got you on. She got you on aliens. She was just talking about, her Mom made her ramen in a thermos, dude. My Mom would make me a thermos full of stuff and I would love it. She didn’t make you a thermos. She would- She took out some soup, warmed it up and put it in a thermos. Have you ever heard about make a pot of soup? Yeah. You’re not making the pot. Make a thermos of soup. She didn’t make, she got it, used canned, man. Stay out of this. Your Mom was- This is between me and my mom. Your Mom was putting canned soup into your thermos. You know what else she was putting in there? That’s more than you were doing. She was also putting Hamburger Helper in there. That was my jam. Hold on, hold on. Cheeseburger, Hamburger Helper in a thermos? That was my favorite. It was better as a leftover, like I loved it so. How did you eat it out of there? Did you pour it out and eat it with a spoon? I just dipped it out with a spoon. You were there. I don’t watch that kind of thing when it’s happening. Somebody eating Hamburger Helper out of a thermos? I blocked it out. Because it kept it hot. Well, I understand that. But then when eating it, you’re sticking a spoon all the way down in the bottom of a thermos? What kind of spoon did you have? How? Your thermos is that big. You got an extra long spoon? I don’t remember that part. Gee, maybe it’s all a lie. I’m disturbed thinking about it. So I really relate to this ramen. I never had braces. I wish I did, but that ship has sailed. Well, here’s the thing. I had ’em and then I was given that, you know, I was given that permanent bottom retainer. ‘Cause something about the human mouth, the bottom teeth are the ones that like to venture back. Keep, keep moving? And then, you know, just, not too long ago, 10 years ago, the dentist is like, “If that thing’s bothering you, we can take it off.” He took it off and gave me a retainer, that I had to put in, at which point the reality intersected with me, which means I don’t do things, like continue to wear retainers, because that requires a certain level of focus and discipline that I don’t have. And so- Well then, why did you say? Oh you. And so my bottom you’ve got crooked. Actually, I can’t. Lift your chin up, dude. Or where your chin would be. Tilt your head up. I’m showing you the outline right there. Oh my God. It’s very clear. Doing that’s not gonna show you anything. Oh yeah. Yeah, I gotcha. It’s not as bad as mine though. Mine are janked. Definitely not as bad as yours, but- Well not janked, but. I will say that most people. Why did you tell ’em to remove the retainer? It’s not, it wasn’t bothering you. You, it had been in there for 30 years. No. Every single time I went to the dentist, they would be like, “Oh, you got a lot of build up on this retainer.” Oh. Okay, whatever. So, I mean- Well hold on, but I’m, but what I’m saying is you shouldn’t feel bad about your bottom teeth. I don’t know what it is, but bottom teeth being crooked, not really seen as a problem. Just watch, start looking at the bottom teeth of actors on television. American actors, I mean. I’m not talking Brits. They got, their teeth are all over the place. Yeah, totally. I’m talking… Oh yeah. Okay. I love you, I love you. I love you England. I’m just, you know, it’s a stereotype. If anyone can take a joke it’s them. Yeah. You guys have taken over the world, imperialism, all that. We can make some jokes about you. The bottom teeth of American actors are regularly janked. It doesn’t matter. And, uh. Yeah. Look. I mean, look at me, I’m successful. Right. But if the top teeth start getting outta whack- And a lot of that success is from, emanates from my face. If the top teeth start getting outta whack, we have to start thinking about casting decisions. Okay? Does this, does this cop seem like they would have crooked top teeth? Yeah. Cause it’s a different thing, it’s just a different thing. Yeah, you’re right. Nothing against people with crooked top teeth. It’s just a different thing, it’s a different casting. You don’t have anything to say about school lunch? My Mom stopped packing lunch for me before high school. So I didn’t take lunch, during high school. Oh yeah. That’s, that’s true. I didn’t. I took my cut lunch- I actually did a whole episode of this, of talking about school lunch, on Stevie’s podcast, “Best Friend’s Back, Alright!”. All right. You wanna check that out. All right, let’s play another one then. Hey, Rhett and Link. Yo. My name is Keoni and I could not have survived my teenage years without video games. Let me tell you. That stuff? Stress reliever, okay? Y’all are kind of old, so like, you might not get it, but that’s alright. Okay. Love you, bye. You love us? Kinda, kinda old. You love us old guys? They had video games when we were coming up, man. Yeah. They just weren’t good. They weren’t good. They weren’t as addictive. They were not as immersive. No. I mean you can only- They were definitely, not as connecting. Well, think about it. You’re watching Mario run sideways. You feel, like, you are not Mario. You know what I’m saying? Like it’s not immersive. I never once thought I was Mario. You’re not seeing Mario, you’re controlling someone else, that you’re watching. Never once thought I was “loo-ghee”. But once you move into this first person perspective- You think that’s it? now you got something that’s addictive in a different way. I’m just kind of making this up as I go, which is most of the time what I’m doing, but I’m just saying, POV- POV. you know, the amount of first person perspective in your gaming experience, that’s how you relate the level of addiction. It’s such a huge part of, I mean, Lincoln’s 17 now, for the past, you know, four years, five years, it’s a huge part of his social life, you know? Yeah. He connects with his friends playing video games. I, you know, I understand and respect that, but at a certain point we’re like, “Let’s do the real world thing.” Especially post pandemic. We had to like shake him out of those habits, a little bit. Is he connecting with any NPCs? Cause that’s what you gotta really work, watch out for. What is that? Oh, you haven’t been paying attention. Hmm. Is that, that’s a… C’mon Dad, get with the program. What is that? A… Non-Player Character. It’s just, you know, an AI generated character in a game that isn’t, it’s just a, you know, it’s an NPC. Pertinent to the story? Yeah, it might be pertinent to the story, but it’s- Like an actor? not controlled by a person. Oh yeah. It’s not an avatar. Okay. Yeah. No, he’s not. You don’t wanna make too big of a connection with an NPC ’cause then you’re socially- No, Rhett, these are his real-life friends. You’re, but, I don’t know, because a lot of people have a lot of connections to NPCs and that can, again, that can lead to, if you are- I’ll have to ask him. If you, if your POV is connecting with NPCs, then you’re SOL. Then your SOL. Exactly. I knew where you were going. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. But Lily was never, Lily, she never connected with friends, playing video games with them, even though she would play, she’d play Overwatch a little bit, back when that was the thing. She didn’t go to Fortnight- Yeah, Shepherd she’s our video- back when that was. Shepherd’s our gamer in the family. He’s the one that has his, like, buddies that they regularly get on there and play together. Locke played like, NBA 2K, for a while. And then high school rolled around, he completely stopped playing video games. He just didn’t. Dunno, he just made decision not to. And did other things. Yeah, he was just, he was just into different things. Yeah. I mean, yeah, for us, it was never, you know, I got Nintendo Power just so I could, I got the subscription just so I could talk, talk the lingo, but I just did not, I just did not have the commitment to beat any game ever. Like it just did not interest me that much. And it never has since then. Like I’m not, I know there are certain points when you’re currently tempted. You told me two days ago. I’m thinking about it. That you wanted to go away for a week. Uh-huh. And do nothing, but play a video game, like, 24 hours a day. I didn’t say 24. When you weren’t sleeping. 12 to 16. You wanted to like, literally like, become a gamer. Well, okay, I’m glad you brought this up. ‘ Cause I have been thinking about it and I just mentioned it to you two days ago. But- I said that. Yeah, I’m just saying it was, it was that, I’ve been thinking about it for a while. It’s only that you know about it since then. So, yes. I do have a personality that if you put me in like a challenging environment, which is a video game, in a lot of ways, and there’s a goal, and so I can get fixated on that. And I actually don’t let myself play video games or even games on my phone really, because I just don’t, I don’t have time right now, right? Were you done with Wordle? Gave it up? Uh, Wordle? Wordle is not every single day anymore. Wordle is like, a few times a week. It’s not the first thing in the morning. So, but Wordle’s not a game. It is it’s game, but yeah. I understand. So, but what I have, I’ve had this idea, that maybe in my older age, when I don’t have as many responsibilities, that I’ll be like, it would be cool to just say like, I’m setting aside a certain amount of time and I’m going to completely immerse myself in one of these incredible games. Having gone away from games after the first Nintendo, pretty much. You had a Genesis. Yeah. That was same time, same era. You didn’t care. But I didn’t even have a Super Nintendo. I didn’t even get on that train. So, to come back to the system now that is just so advanced, and then be like, I’m gonna get lost in this immersive world, and I’m just gonna see what it’s like, to just like, eat Cheetos, drink Mountain Dew, have a sleeping bag- That’s a stereotype. next to a gaming chair. I won’t perpetuate. I’ll have a gaming chair with like a sleeping bag next to it, in like a cabin with a good WiFi. And I’m gonna just immerse myself. Why does it have to a cabin? That has nothing to do with it? ‘Cause I don’t want anyone to see this. It could be a closet. Yeah, but I don’t want anyone to be close to me. Well. I mean smelling like Cheetos and Mountain Dew. Yeah, you’ll be in a closet. But I have to come out at some point, and crap. You wanna do this for a week? But I think, but so then I started thinking, “Why wait until I get old and do it, and why not make it into content while I’m still young and people care about the content?” Foray into the gaming. So, Rhett takes a week, goes deep into a game, like what’s the elder? What’s the one that everybody? Elder Ring. Elder? Elden Ring. Elden Ring? What’s about, what are the scrolls? That’s different? Elders. God, we don’t know, man. You got, hold on. There’s those old scrolls. And then there’s old rings and which one’s better? I believe that the Elden Rings- Elden Ring is a video game, I just couldn’t- is it, is it one ring? Or is it many rings? Anyway, the thing I’m worried about, is that I’ll suck so bad at the mechanics of it because of all the buttons. That’s why VR is gonna leap frog, bring me back into this. Oh man, I gotta. I got a VR headset and so do you. Yeah. Yeah it hurts. Hurts my face. You know, just wait for it. Just wait for it, to be- When is it gonna stop hurting my face, man? a new plan. I wanted to be like “Ready Player One”. But you know what? I get it, caller. I couldn’t quite understand your name. It was quiet. Well it, yeah, sort of dropped out at that point. I get it. I get it though. Hey guys, I could not have survived my teenage years without my Crocs. Now I know what you’re thinking, “Shoes?” Not only are they simulating, what I imagine walking on clouds is like, they’re also reliable and sturdy. Being a three-sport athlete, the Croc is the most practical shoe after your sport is over and you wanna take off your sweaty footwear. I actually survived a hairy moment in my Crocs too. My mother wasn’t paying attention one day when she picked me up from school and thought I was already in the car. I wasn’t. She started driving off with my foot underneath the tire. My foot, the Crocs, unbroken. That Croc saved my foot. And let’s not forget to mention that a Croc can go from cruise-control to sport mode real quick. Yep. With a simple straps maneuver. Anyways, thanks for listening. Have a splendid week. Thanks guys. Wow. Elise Myers. Thanks for calling us. Didn’t she sound like Elise? Yeah, a little bit. A little bit. Well also, I really appreciate the fact that you scripted that before you called in. Don’t, don’t expose her. No, I’m just saying that I, no, I’m not making fun, I’m saying that- I mean you don’t, don’t crawl attention to it. No, I liked it too, but. I, no I’m saying I- I don’t want people to think- You’re the one making it seem like it’s a problem. No, I’m not making it- If you don’t know what you’re gonna say, you can script it out and call in, just like this person did. But don’t acknowledge it. Make it seem like, “You know what? That was a well put together call.” Can I just say it was a well-written call? No! That’s what I’m saying. Because I have to believe that it was. Cause now people are, you’re making people not wanna do that, because they’re gonna think that you’re gonna say- I’m never say I’m gonna say it again. I’m never gonna point it out. This is a first caller who read, who read their response. If we think you reading your response, we are not gonna say that. And I’ll never acknowledge it. I will never acknowledge it again. Okay? Now let’s talk about the content. Right. Okay? We don’t have to have a meta-conversation about every call. I mean- Crocs. I was hating on Crocs from a distance. I gotta say, I mean we’re well into summer, I haven’t seen you, I haven’t seen you in a public place with those Crocs yet. You wore ’em one time to my house. And I was wearing socks. Yeah. I put ’em on this morning because I couldn’t find my flip-flops. But you didn’t- Without socks, to take the dogs out. Oh, well that doesn’t. And my feet immediately feel sweaty. Yeah. Even, even before they are. That’s the problem. And then they get sweaty in the Crocs. Like I can’t. I have to wear flip-flops. And I’m not even a particularly sweaty-foot person. I bought some foot-sweat deterrent. Why don’t… I like the Crocs with the socks. I get it. I understand. It’s like they’re in and out. And then I like the sport mode, yeah. If you need it, if you’re gonna, I didn’t know that if your foot got run over while wearing them- I think that was just luck. I think that was luck. I don’t think Croc did anything, but I did get some, you know, I… When coming up I had my, ’cause I had very sweaty hands and very sweaty feet. As I’ve gotten older, the problem has got much less pronounced. Oh, but you couldn’t have survived your teenage years without? Drysol. How do you remember the name of that? Because I don’t know, man? I, you know, I care about you. I gotta be a repository for the stuff that matters. Well, there’s a new product that is better. Didn’t it work though? It was like a, you would put a little drop on your hand- It’s the same thing, I think and then a drop on your other hand and you rub ’em together and then they wouldn’t sweat? Well, that was, “wouldn’t sweat” is debatable. It wasn’t like a miracle cure. You know, you can get Botox in your palms, if you’ve got really, like, some kids, some teens will get Botox in the… Sure. Does your glasses have a camera in them? Because you just, like- Sure, keep going. I just, the way you grabbed. Yeah. You grabbed your glasses in a way with two hands that you never have, and it was like, “Does he have those Facebook Raybans?” Is he wearing those Facebook Raybans? It’s like, just keep doing what you’re doing? Yes. First of all, have you seen ads for those? The Facebook Raybans? No. What do you mean Facebook Raybans? What, you don’t know about this? No. This is months old, but I saw an ad recently and I was like, “Oh, that’s still that, they’re still trying to do that.” I don’t give a about Facebook. You don’t have to give a about Facebook. Do you care about Raybans? Yeah. What are you talking about, dude? Rayban and Facebook, or Meta, are collaborating on a product, that is a stylish pair of classic Raybans, that have a camera in them, to capture all and share all the moments in your life. You don’t know about this, man? You need to look at billboards more. ‘Cause there’s one on a billboard. That’s how I was reminded of it. You know what? That’s good advice. But it was- I’m gonna start looking at billboards more. But it was like in the news in a pretty big way, like last year. I promise you Rhett from now on, I’m gonna be looking at billboards more. So, I thought that maybe you had those. I don’t, we don’t have to get into a conversation about that, but I think- You’re really tangent-prone today. Yeah. Stay on target man. Okay. We’re talking about Crocs. No, we’re talking about hand sweat. So I had Drysol, there’s a new product- No, we weren’t. called Carp? Put in, Google “hand, sweat”, “hand, sweat, stopper, carp.” Cause they got all, this is, I think it was a Kickstarter. They have all kinds of stuff. Carp? Like the fish? Yeah, there it is. Carpe. Nope. Carpe Max, like “carpe diem”. So they have ’em for your feet, your hands. It’s probably all the same stuff, maybe in different concentrations? Treat palmar hyperhidrosis. That’s what you had. Uh-huh, and it runs in the family, ’cause my kids have it too. So I basically- Hand lotion. This is not a sponsor, of course. So I started, you’ve seen the little, speaking of like Crocs, you’ve seen those little leather slipper things that I’ve been wearing, which are like, kind of like leather Crocs. Yeah. And a couple of weeks ago, when the weather hadn’t quite heated up yet, I could wear those and be like- Right. “This is okay.” I tried wearing ’em yesterday. Oo boy. And, or is it today? Did I come in here with ’em on? Who cares? Yeah, it was today. We do too much in one day. It becomes two days in my mind. Wow. This morning I came in here with those things on. What’d you do with them? I took ’em off and put on, I have some other shoes here and I put on other shoes ’cause I was like, “My feet are sweating too much.” And I was like, “I gotta get this stuff.” I have it. I ordered it. I just haven’t put it on my feet yet. You have to put on your feet every night, though. It’s not sexy. I think? I don’t know. I’m not gonna, I’m not, it may become a sponsor. So I’m gonna look into it more before I start getting concerned about if it’s gonna stop up your feet pores. Carpe, call us. Well it literally, it literally, physically- I don’t wanna do that- clogs, I’m just gonna say, it literally clogs your pores with, I think some sort of compound, maybe aluminum? But don’t quote me on that. That then your sweat just finds another way out. Do you like Crocs? Not with socks. So your feet don’t sweat in Crocs? I don’t have any. Well, yeah you do. You were given the red Crocs the same time I was. And then I, I gave them to the- Yeah you gave ’em away. I donated them to the company. Somebody here at Mythical has them. Yeah. Size 12. We’re great bosses. I see people wearing my clothes every occasionally. Yeah, yeah. If we have clothes that we don’t like, and we don’t want anymore, we give it to our employees. I see my clothes all the time round here. And we don’t dock their pay. No. It’s an honor system. They dock their own pay. Yeah. Right, right, right. You decide what it’s worth. All right, let’s take another. Oh. Hey Rhett and Link. This is Nico calling from Pittsburgh, PA- What up? and I definitely could not have survived my teenage years without Mountain Dew. Easy way of summing it up, as someone who now graduated high school eight years ago now, feeling old just saying that, when you’re a drummer in a band growing up, you learn that if you wanna melt faces, you gotta “do the Dew”, you gotta have that energy coming from somewhere, especially when energy drinks are not only dangerous, but a little on the pricey side. At least, it’s how it was back then, and I know it’s pretty much how it is now. But definitely could not have survived it without good old Mountain Dew and that’s any variety too. Okay. All right. Nico. Except for Baja Blast, there. Thanks guys. Thanks for calling. I think Nico might be a toll-booth worker. Yeah. Well it’s funny. I mean- Just based on the sounds. I’m just trying to piece together the setting. If you’re gonna talk about Mountain Dew- You might as well be… its appropriate that there’s like engines revving in the back. Yeah, yeah, yeah. People are “doing the Dew” behind him or all around him. Yeah. He could be at one of those. Sometimes people will gather in parking lots and play around with remote-control. Have you seen how crazy the remote-control stuff can get these days? Have you, have you, have you a been- We’re talking about “the Dew”, man. I’m just following the, I’m just following my instincts today. It’s like you’re, man, your… You’re speaking of Mountain Dew. I’m just saying- No. What? No. Have you just been out and about in this town and then all of a sudden it’s just like outta nowhere- I’ve seen remote-control planes. No, no. I’m talking like- Drones? I’m talking to like a real, a badass- Car? car just comes outta nowhere. And then you’re like, “Where’s the Dad and the son? Where are they?” Right. And then you see them. Well, whoa, you’re walking where? In like a- I’ve this, I’ve been, I have been- parking lot to a Gelson’s? I’ve been cornered by remote-control vehicles, seven times in my time in LA. Sometimes I’ve been on a trail. Sometimes I’ve been in a parking lot. Sometimes I’ve been on the sidewalk. Sometimes I’ve been walking down the street in my neighborhood. Bam! There it is. I prefer to be in the thing that’s moving. You know what I’m saying? Yeah. I’m not saying I’m an advocate. I’m just saying I’m just- You sound like an advocate. I’m just saying I’m just, this is an awareness play. We can relate to this Nico though, because we couldn’t have gotten through without Mello Yello. Oh God. What? I mean, how much Mello Yello did we drink? I mean, we just, we couldn’t drink enough of it. Like I, we felt like it was like, it was like we had an exclusive deal with it. I guarantee you didn’t drink as many as me. Of course not. ‘Cause I would get home. I know. I would get home and we did not keep them in the fridge because they moved too fast. My Mom kept her diet Coke and caffeine-free diet Coke, depending on the time of day, in the refrigerator. The Mello Yello was kept, you know where it was. On the floor. On the floor next to the onion and potatoes box. Everybody had that. Yeah. And then I would get home from a hot, hot day. I would reach down, I’d pop that thing open. I’d grab a Mello Yello. I’d, I’d swig- Pound it. I’d pound the first one. Then I’d get a second one and go sit down with it. Both hot. Both hot and both full, carbonated, sugary, caffeinated drinks. Oh gosh. The first, I didn’t understand what was happening. Yeah. We didn’t- We didn’t have the education. No one told us about caffeine. Like I would go home and pound five cigarettes. It just- This is not the fifties. No. This is the eighties. I mean, but it kind of feels like cigarettes, you know? Well, we didn’t know. We didn’t know about sugar. In the same way that like we weren’t educated on, you just can’t pound a bunch of Mello Yello’s like that. It didn’t have an impact on us. But do you ever remember making the connection between caffeine- And being wired? and like being, “I can’t sleep tonight. Must have been those seven Mello Yello’s I had at dinner.” Never. How come? The internet makes people so much smarter. You know, it makes ’em dumber too, but just think about how dumb we were, man. We didn’t know anything. Were there kids in the eighties who knew about this stuff? I had, when’s the last time you had a Mello Yello? I wanna go get one right now. Every time we talk about this, this is how this part of the conversation is. Do you think we could find one right now? They have em’ at a gas station? If you go to one of those, like 100 soft drink, fountain drink machines. The Coke? Coke machine? Like Five Guys have one. Coke remix? What is it called? Coke? Yeah. Oh man. They got ’em in the theaters, at the AMC theaters, I think. Yeah. Five Guys has one and you can get a Mello Yello Zero. Yeah, yeah. I’ve had it. And you know what? I’m tempted to just start ordering those off the internet, but I don’t want to- No, no, no. I don’t wanna be drinking a bunch of those. Look, I’m not a doctor. I like it being a treat. I don’t think you should make diet soda or definitely not soda, but I don’t think you should make diet soda a part of your daily routine. Because that diet soda does some stuff to your, to your biome, like your gut biome. And I just don’t think you need it in there. Those artificial sweeteners, man, we don’t know what they’re doing. It might be worse than sugar. Probably not. But like I just have it as an occasional treat while I’m here at the office. Don’t get started on ’em. That’s what I think too. But I happen to be looking at a Reddit thread. This guy, he might have been on Twitter? He wasn’t a billboard, though? He quit, wasn’t a billboard. He said, “I quit diet Coke. I’ve been drinking it my whole life. Oh I saw this. I quit for a whole month. I’m here to report-” I’m here to report. “My life has not changed for the better. I haven’t, I haven’t gotten in better shape. I haven’t lost weight-” Well, he went on to say that, “I’m not happy anymore.” “I don’t feel any different. I’m not happy-” It wasn’t- I’m just not happy anymore.” Yeah. He was like, yeah. And then all these people were talking about, “Hey man,” people were like, coming into the thread and saying, “Well you know, I tried all these things to make my body better. And then I got cancer. So drink your, drink your diet Coke.” And I was like, “Gosh.” This is like a, what’s the word? Like, a jaded group of society where they’re like, kind of snarky and jaded? Can’t think of the word. Snarky and jaded people. You’re thinking about- Nihilists? No, just a little bitter. Is it the nihilists? A little bitter. You know, it does suck, this like, if you try to do everything right, and you try to be healthy, you gotta choose your, you gotta choose your moments, at least. Your like, your happy little indulgences. I’m not gonna judge anyone for doing it. I’m just- For drinking your, but people were like coming out of the woodwork to tell this guy, “Go back to drinking your diet Coke.” Yeah. But here’s the thing. The thing- If you’re not happy. the thing you were probably really enjoying in the diet Coke is the caffeine. There are other vehicles for caffeine. Here’s one of ’em right here. Not a sponsor, but we drink the hell outta this stuff, this Yerba Mate. That’s better for you than diet Coke. And coffee. They’re finding- Yeah, right. Here it is right here. Coffee. They’re finding it now that people who drink coffee specifically, there was a study that said that people who drink coffee sweetened… So people who drink coffee are less likely to get, I think it was cancer? But people who drink sweetened coffee- He thinks it was cancer. for some reason are more unlikely to, like 30% less likely, now that’s just one study, but there’s other sources of caffeine. But while we’re talking about that and I said the thing about gut biome, I have to also talk about, I’ve told you about the Kefir kick I’m on right now. And I have to, and I have to tell you. I love Kefir but I can’t get it in a big enough container. Well, you get multiple of small ones. I don’t like that. But let me tell you. There’s only like two and a half servings in a, in the thing of Kefir. I, listen, I know you think- Yeah tell ’em. you might just think, we just went all LA. We did. We did. I love Kefir, it’s tangy. I love yogurt. It’s milky. But the, and I am not one of these people that- Mm, my mouth is watering right now. like talking about like probiotics and like, I, you know, a lot of probiotics just like, is kind of BS and doesn’t really get through your system or whatever. But let me tell you right now. So, I just had this idea that I was gonna get back into Kefir because I liked it. But I was like, what I usually do is I get one and I go through it and then it takes weeks to get the second one. Right. It doesn’t become a part of my routine. Yeah, and you go through it quick, right? And so I just told Jessie, I was like, “I would like you to have three things. Kefir, kimchi- Okay. and kombucha. Oh, the. And it’s unfortunate, those are three K’s. Three K’s. Yeah. There’s gotta be a better way to refer to them. Yeah. So I’m working on that. I’m workshopping the way I refer to those, ’cause it cannot be the “KKK” diet. Cause that’s not, it’s not gonna be that, okay? No you can’t, you can’t. But- You know what? It already exists, probably. It’s a sad, this is a sad reality. So those three K’s obviously are all very probiotic. Lots of people just consider these things to be like “life tonics”, right? And so I was like, “I like all three of these things. I feel good.” But the one that I have not wavered from at all, for about three months is Kefir. Either, if I don’t have it in the morning, I have it at night and I get at least a cup. Mm hmm. Throw some granola in there, throw some berries in there. Oh, you eat it as a meal. You eat it as a snack, meal, drink. This is the ticket. For breakfast lately, I’ve been doing cereal, but instead of milk it’s Kefir. Oh listen, don’t write that down, ’cause I’m gonna put it in my recipe book. But- I, I don’t like this idea, but go ahead. Okay. But the, really the thing I’m trying to communicate here is that give Kefir a chance. This is what happened. What happened? I started, I was gonna say I started taking it, I started eating it. And I didn’t have anything in mind other than- Can you make it like Mountain Dew, you started “doing” it. I started doing Kefir. Doing the Kefir. And I was, and I forgot- Brilliant marketing, by the way, Mountain Dew has like, has subconsciously said they’re a drug. Okay, let me, I gotta get this out. Get it out! You keep interrupting me. Okay, so. I start drinking Kefir. And then I just kind of forgot that I was doing it, but it had become a daily thing. I’m having a conversation with my therapist and I told him, I’m like, “You know, I’m a generally happy person.” Right? I am, I’m a pretty happy person. You know, I haven’t, I have never been like diagnosed with depression or anything like that. I go through, like anybody, I go through like depressive states or sad states or whatever, but I’m pretty happy. But I kept finding myself, over the course of a couple of weeks, with no external thing to explain it, being like, I keep realizing that I’m happy. Okay? It was just weird. ‘Cause it hadn’t happened before. I’m not the kind of person who realizes that they’re happy and like stops and thinks, “I’m happy.” That’s, that’s strange. Noted. Yeah. Started talking to my therapist about it. And then I was like, didn’t pick up on it in the first session. But then like a couple of sessions, a couple of weeks later, I was like, “The only thing that is different, is Kefir.” You think Keffir’s made you happy? Okay. So, so. Okay, you think I’m crazy, and I probably am. But I go on Reddit, your favorite website, and I search in Kefir and then all these people are saying the same thing. That it has, the other thing I noticed is that, how do I put this mildly? My dooky was good. You know what I’m saying? Yeah. Like to put it bluntly. Like that I was regulated. In a way that I’ve only been regulated if I started taking supplemental fiber, which I just don’t like doing, ’cause it’s hard to keep up with and it sucks. Yeah. But Kefir had the same impact on my gastrointestinal system that supplemental fiber did. But also my mood was elevated. And of course I haven’t read, I’m sure you’re all like, “Oh there’s all these…” I know there’s all these books about your gut biome and the neurons in your stomach. And there’s all this science behind it that I’m not familiar with. But I’m just saying anecdotally, as just a dude who’s been eating a lot of Kefir, I’m telling you right now. You scraped out the sad-causing bacteria, and replaced it with happy bacteria. I don’t know, but then, literally, I’m not kidding. You forgot to take it. I ran outta Kefir like a month ago. Okay? I went for 10 days without eating Kefir. And I found myself, I woke up one day and I’m like, “I’m sad. What’s different?” And I was like, “It’s the damn Kefir.” Got to Kefir, told Jessie, “We gotta have Kefir. We can’t run out.” You got back to the Kefir? Got back to the Kefir. Are you? I’m two weeks back into Kefir, I’m happy. I, it could, it’s probably totally psychosomatic. I understand that. But I’m saying, it could be a placebo effect? But you should try it. I like it. But here’s the thing. I like being happy. Don’t stop. Just keep it coming. Keep it going. Doesn’t come in a big enough container. Is there like a cheap version of it? Get two. I, you know, it’s pricey. You can afford it. I need it in bulk, man. You can afford Kefir. It’s a lot better than Mountain Dew, Nico. That’s ultimately what I was saying. If we could just get Kefir to be caffeinated, we’d be, maybe that could be a product. It’s like, it’s drinkable yogurt that makes you happy. Hey listen. I swear by it. Pretty good. Keffir’s a keeper. You know, I can come up with all kinds of funny things to say on how I survived my teenage years, but in all due honesty, I really could not have survived my teenage years without my, you know, my support group, my friends, my family. Because I was a way different person as a teenager than I am now. I hated who I was as a teenager, but I’ve definitely grown more like, especially since high school, high school was bad for me, But yeah, I literally could not have survived my teenage years without my friends, because the way my personality was, I probably would’ve just spiraled into a deep depression- Hmm. and I’m glad I’m in a way better place than I am now. So thank you for listening, Rhett and Link. Love you guys. I love this response. Wow. Isn’t this great? It might be better than Kefir. I know this, that was like, that was like Kefir in a voicemail. Yeah. And he didn’t give his names. So I think, we could call him Kefir. Kefir Sutherland just called in to the, to the pod. Thanks for sharing that. You make an excellent point, that when you’re in your teenage years, you are not in your final form. Mm. And it, you can, you can change for the better. And sometimes it’s just about weathering the storm of being a teenager to get to the next phase of your life, where you can start to pull it all back together, you know? Or pull it together for the first time. I tell my kids this all the time. And I, you know, I was talking to Locke the other day. He’s 18. He’s going off to college in the fall. Mm hmm. And I don’t remember the context of the conversation. I just remember saying, “You have no idea how much you’re gonna change over the next four years. Like you are going to change more-” Oh yeah. “statistically speaking, over the next four years than you will ever change in any additional four years, subsequent four years, for the rest of your life.” And I was like, “That’s, that’s exciting.” Not that you need to change, but you need to, you need to understand just how wet your concrete is. Ha. You know what I’m saying? Yeah, yeah, yeah. I like that. And just revel in that wetness, man, you know what I’m saying? Because it gets harder and harder and harder. Well, I don’t know. You know, you say revel in it, but it makes me think, okay, you gotta be strategic about who, you know, who you… To Keffir’s point. Oh, you can screw it up for sure. Who you, you know. What you expose yourself to when you’re morphing, you know? You’re morphing into who you’re gonna be, at a rate greater than any other point in your life when you’re a teenager. So it’s like, you gotta, you gotta be thinking about that. And I mean, you’re talking about end of college years too, which yeah, you know, you’re still in teen years. But who you, who your people are, it like makes a big difference. Show me your friends and I’ll show you your future. Yeah, man. I mean, I’m so grateful for the friends that we had in high school, and we’ve talked about them. The friends that we have in college, like, you know, we’re going to Denver in like, in a handful of weeks, we’re gonna have like a college-friend getaway in Denver. The fact that like, we’re still connected to these people, who actually care about us. It’s like, it’s an awesome feeling to know that like, Mm. you can, somebody cares about you and there’s no strings attached, you know? You got- Yeah. having a support structure is so important and it’s not something that you can just, you know, you can’t put a, I guess you could put a “want” ad in the paper or whatever the app version of that is now, there’s a digital way to do that. Even if you look at Mythical Beasts, I draw lots of comfort and just inspiration, knowing that there’s people who’ve connected because of our content. But then it’s more about their connections with each other than it is with us now. That’s freaking awesome. Mm. You know, I mean, whether it’s because of us or something else, I mean, yeah, he makes a great point that like, that having a few key people in your life, that love you and you know, you can trust, makes all the difference in the world. And so I think about the people who don’t have that and it’s like, but you can get it. Like, that’s the hope in this is that like, he said, “With my personality and what I was prone to at that phase of my life, like, I don’t think I would’ve made it. I wouldn’t make it to become the person that I was destined to be, so to speak, if it wasn’t for people there along the way.” To, I don’t know, you know, he didn’t fill in the gaps, but we all need to do that for ourselves. Yeah. And I think that, you know- To provide support direction, fill in the blank. They, inherent in that message is, you don’t have to be a teenager for this to be applicable, but, regardless of how hopeless you feel at this moment, don’t let this moment, these circumstances, define. Don’t let the present define your future, I guess, is a better way to say it, right? It’s so hard to do that. It’s very difficult to do that. Yeah. That’s why people could be helpful in that. But sometimes you like, because even when it comes to the choices you’re making, that, I mean, the whole, “Show me your friends and I’ll show you your future.” The reason that makes sense, and to some degree, it’s not, you know, it’s not like, an airtight always true thing, but. The reason is that we, a lot of times make decisions about who we’re gonna surround ourselves with based on current needs. Needs for acceptance, most often. Need for belonging. And those things are not bad in and of themselves. But if you’re finding acceptance and belonging with people who don’t have your best interest in mind, then your future self, wishes they could come back to your present self and say, “Ah, don’t make that decision.” So that’s the thing, try to anticipate, “What would my future self want me to, what kind of decisions would they want me to make right now?” It’s very tough to do that, but you have to try. You have to try to. Yeah. Especially when it comes to who you’re choosing to associate with. Yeah. That phrase of like “Finding your people,” is something that we use in our home a lot. For every stage of life, you know, whether it’s Lando assimilating into elementary school and now moving on to middle school and then Lincoln moving through middle school and high school and Lily finding her way and her people in college, like at every stage. And then you think about us, like even, you know, like post-college and moving out here to California. We had each other and we had our families, but we had to find a few more friends. We had to find some people. Yeah. That we could count on, you know? And until we did, it felt tenuous, you know, moving out here. Oh, for sure. Then you just have, we had a couple of close friends that we kind of jumped into really quickly, and those are very sound decisions, you know? Mm hmm. Still close to them. But you know, just adding to that group and this, it doesn’t have to be big. But you, it’s important no matter what. So this is not a teenage thing. Mm hmm. But yeah, I’m so glad that you called in, Kefir. Let’s hear another one. Hello, Rhett and Link. My name is Savannah and I could not have survived my teenage years without fan fiction. What? Yep. And just so you know, fan fiction doesn’t have to be super sexual and weird, it can just be like a normal story about your favorite characters, just going on a silly little adventure. And that’s the kind of thing that I like to read, and write, eventually. So I got into fan fiction when I was around like 12 and I started writing at like 13. And then throughout middle school and high school, I wrote a crap-ton of fan fiction, ’cause I was also homeschooled. So I was very bored. Oh. So, I actually wrote over 250,000 words, up until I started college and got way too busy, which is like, two-plus books I think? Roughly, if you average ’em out and that’s not even a lot compared to most fan fiction writers. So yeah. I still love writing. But fan fiction is like my weird little hobby that I don’t tell anyone about because people hear fan fiction and think sex-kink. So yep. That, that’s it. Thank you, Susanna. We don’t think- Savannah. Savannah? Savannah. Yep. Savannah. Savannah, if you wanna call back in and talk about being a furry too, you can debunk some of that stigma. Oh, come on. You don’t know that. They’re not always, this, it’s not a Venn-diagram- I’m not saying. is not a circle. It’s not. I’m just, that was my way of saying, “Thank you, Savannah, for dismantling the stigma of fan fiction for me.” Fan fiction is not fan friction. It’s a sub genre. Yeah. Well, and we don’t know that, I mean- Well. Our experience with fan fiction is just being uncomfortable reading stuff about ourselves, for a gimmick- Well. on the show. I do know someone. Okay. And you also know this person. Because the people who, especially in fandoms that are fictional to begin with, I mean, it’s one thing for there to be fan fiction about two real dudes like us, but I’m talking about like, you’ve got a world that’s been built by an author or a TV show or whatever. Yeah, yeah. And then, I mean that fan fiction, which is basically people just taking the world that’s already been built and the characters that have existed and telling new stories, that kind of exist within this world. That was the world that I didn’t know about until we met somebody who actually has contributed significantly to some of those things. And it totally makes sense, first of all. And one of the really exciting things that’s happening, related to this, and again, I’m not smart enough to be able to explain it or understand it, but something with the blockchain. With blockchain technology. Oh are you talking about collaborative storytelling? Is making that, is easing and encouraging that process and inviting more people and incentivizing more people to be involved in that, to actually be able to take narratives and shape them, which is pretty exciting stuff. So actually I think, I think that those who were the first to begin writing fan fiction, were actually just way ahead of the curve, in terms of what we’re all going to be participating in, when it comes to the way that we relate to storytelling in the future. Because the more you can be involved, to the point that you’re actually manipulating the outcome, you know, influencing the outcome, influencing the stories or telling their own, your own stories, like that’s gonna be just the way people interact with stories a generation from now. It’s starting now. Again, I’m not a really a student of it. I just know smart people who know more about it than I do, who say things and I get 10% of it and can then re-spit it out like this. But I- But it’s exciting. if you think about it in terms of, okay, favorite book series, “Lord of the Rings”, it’s, there’s an incredible world, that’s been built and it’s a playground. I’m sure that there’s got to be fan fiction all around the world of Tolkien, right? So. Of course. I just found myself, well, I just don’t, I’m not a reader and I’m not a writer, right? So it’s like, do I have to be? What, you laughing at me? No, I… I mean, I can read. Yeah. And I can write. Prove it. But that is not, you know, that’s not central to my identity, it’s not one of my major hobbies. I, yeah. You’re making me defensive. I, well. I’m not a reader and a writer. I’m not- You can snicker all you want. What I’m saying is that the, and also this is something that, this is something that Mike helped me understand about Dungeons and Dragons, which I didn’t really understand, the appeal of D&D- Yeah, and… I- but you’re essentially- It’s making your own. it’s a collaborative storytelling process. But my point, what I was getting at was, I assume because I’m so into the world of Tolkien, that like, it just seems like there’s a barrier to, okay, this is just a fan generated story, it’s not canon, so it’s- It’s not Tolkien. Yeah, so, but like, if you look at the Star Wars universe, lots of fan fiction there, absolutely as well. Like every place you can think of there’s fan fiction, but like with Star Wars, it’s not like everything’s George Lucas anymore. It’s like, you look at the John Favreau stuff and- Isn’t the- Yeah. isn’t the Mandalorian fan fiction? Well, is it sophisticated? Well-funded fan fiction, but it’s fan fiction. Did George Lucas, did the originator of the story come up with it? No, it was like- Right. “Oh, this is a story that we can tell.” That’s what I’m getting at. So what I’m saying is, fan fiction is already here. It’s officially sanctioned. It’s just well-funded fan fiction is on Disney+ or whatever, you know? Yeah. I’m just saying, this is a revolution in storytelling. But when it becomes canon, like that stuff is, it’s certified. Yeah. So then, there’s like buy-in. Because when it builds a world and especially with all of the Star Wars stuff, part of the fun for me is like, fitting it all together. But all you have to do- You know? cause I’m not gonna, I’m not sitting around waiting to write fan fiction. So fan fiction, there’s a lot of fun that’s, when you don’t care, beyond canon. And that’s the part that I don’t, I have never experienced it. So I think that’s my barrier to entry. But you’ve experienced the curated fan fiction, as a person who likes to watch television shows. I know it could be entertaining and there’s really talented people writing fan fiction, I, in theory. But I’ve not experienced it and I’m just really curious how, if I could get over that hurdle of like, “I’m just reading this for the fun of it,” but this didn’t really happen to this character. But did the first thing happen to the character? No, because it’s a fictional tale. You think that Sam and Frodo are actually best friends? You know what? One day you’ll find out I’m actually smarter than you. You know. That’s gonna blow your mind. Oh, well, first of all, why do you take anything that I said as a critique on your level of intelligence? You laughed at me for not being a reader or writer. The only thing I laughed at was when you said, “Now I’m not a reader, or a writer.” It’s like, that’s just funny. I thought it was a joke. It’s not a joke. I thought you were making a funny, I thought it was pretty funny. It was, I guess, unintentionally funny. But what I’m saying is- I’m just being me, man. is that, I feel like my eyes are being opened to the possibilities. Not in a way that I’m directly contributing to, or experiencing. You’re saying the same thing I’m saying. But I’m just saying that I think it’s pretty cool what’s happening. And I think that it’s gonna be second nature for our kids and our, especially our kid’s kids, who are gonna grow up in a world in which the lines between the fan fiction that Savannah’s talking about and the fan fiction that everyone is experiencing, which is just cool world-building and stories that come from that world, the lines are just gonna be blurred, man. And then it’s gonna be like, is it good or not? But what you’re saying is that somebody has to be in charge. And I think this is where the cool, and again, I don’t understand it, the cool sort of blockchain generated, it’s curated. It’s not completely just like, “Oh, here’s fan fiction that would conflict with this fan fiction over here.” But no, the collaborative is creating fan fiction that fits together and doesn’t contradict. Is consistent. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Right. You’re interested in the consistency, which I totally get that. Right. That matters to me. And I think it matters to most people, honestly. But I’m just saying that if you get that curated, sort of semi-regulated fan fiction and then regulated in terms of quality. Like that’s- I’m open. that’s an exciting future. I’m open. And I’m also open to the kinky stuff. So this is what I could not survive my teenage years without, I don’t think it’s that crazy, but I’m 19 now and I still do this and whenever I was really sad or angry or just, you know, really intense feelings as a teenager, I would crush bath bombs. And my friends would always gimme bath bombs, ’cause you know, I was taking baths. But I would go in my bathroom like, when, after my parents were asleep and I would just like crush them, like with my bare hands. And it was actually really nice, like it released a lot of stress. You’d be surprised, but yeah. Wow. I like that. Crushing bath bombs. But not actually taking a bath with them. Well, you could get a two-for-one. Yeah. Crush it and let it crumble into the water. Yeah. And then you, I mean the double stress relief. What do you do when you’re angry? Physically. When I’m angry? When I’m angry? I mean, when I’m angry. I mean, I have taken a walk. Oh. I’ve definitely inadvertently sent Christy on a few walks. Hmm? That’s, Christy goes on walks when I perturb her. You curse when you get upset. I curse when I get upset. I curse when I get upset, yeah. But when I was a kid, my Mom told me to go punch a pillow, which I actually did. There’s no satisfaction. This is what I was getting at. There’s no satisfaction in punching a pillow. You remember in my room when you walked into my room and there was that hole in the wall. Yeah. And it was exactly the diameter of my heel. It was because I got mad at my brother one time and I kicked, like, kicked the wall with my heel and you know, goes, my heel, “Boom.” Got a high arch. Yeah. So it goes right through. It was that way until- So you, it was like a donkey kick? it was a side- From the back. no, it was sideways. Oh, like a Bruce Lee? It was a sidekick. Oh. And- And you also kicked the bleachers when you were playing basketball as a teen and broke your toe. And I will say- You’re a kicker. I’m well, I’m also a puncher. But not a closed-fist puncher because I care about my hands. I’m gonna be honest with you guys. I’m gonna be vulnerable here. Last week, I was in my own bathroom and I was going in and out of the closet. Now I’m a tall man, and I hit my head on door, I would hit my head on more doorframes. If they’re not regulation, if they’re not six foot, eight, I hit my head on ’em sometimes. But I’ve actually gotten really good at not hitting my head on things because I subconsciously lower my neck anytime, lower my head, anytime I go through a doorframe. Hmm. But sometimes with an especially short door frame, which for some reason, the frame between my bathroom and my bathroom closet is pretty low. And I normally don’t think about this, but I went into the closet, went into the bathroom, then forgot something and did like a pivot, where I took one step into the bathroom and turned back around. Bam! Hit my head. Mm hmm. The crown of my head. Ooh! On the doorframe. The metal doorframe where the thing slides. Oh gosh. And my immediate reaction was to punch it! It was just like- Like palm-heel strike? Palm-heel strike to the wall next to the door. I didn’t hit the door because the door is a big mirror. I don’t wanna break anything. I don’t wanna bleed it. Josh will be proud with the- Boom! palm-heel strike. And it was just like, and Jessie was like, in the like, Jessie was like 15 feet away. And she was like, “Somebody’s got issues.” Or something like, I don’t know what she said. No, you just hit your head. But no, but the reason I did it, is because I was already mad about something else. And I don’t even remember. Mm hmm, mm hmm. You never remember what you were mad about. That’s right. Comes out sideways. What I’ll say, is that I’ve never hit a person in anger, with the exception of John Carson and John Enzor. And one time that was in your defense. You’re welcome. Okay. But that was- I never hit, I’ve never hit a person. And that was like, almost 40 years ago. But I’ve never hit a person in anger, but I have hit a house, like a home. If a wall is part of a home. I’m not a striker. I’ve hit a car. I probably have hit a pole. Okay. They never seem to care. Yeah. I mean, I like crushing a bath bomb. But this. This is it. The reason that- Just keep, just keep ’em stacked up. The great thing about this. Keep one in your pocket. Punching or kicking SHEETROCK and it giving a little bit, gives you a sense of relief. Pillows, they’re not fighting back at all. Bath bomb may be the perfect thing, because- It’s like plaster. it’s like, you’re destroying it, there’s a sense of satisfaction, but nobody’s getting hurt. Except the bath bombs. Here’s one. Hailing Link. Yo. So my name’s Danielle and this is gonna be a very Gen-Z answer. I could not have survived being a teenager without the “block” button on social media. That thing was my best friend throughout middle school and high school. And I wish there was an in-person version of it. Love you guys. Bye. Ooh. Oh yeah, Danielle. The block button. The block button. I mean, if I had to experience social media as a teen, man, I don’t- You wouldn’t be here. I don’t know. I just don’t know. Would’ve done something too stupid to recover from. I mean. Man, the block button. Yeah. That, that. Having a healthy relationship with the block button is probably a really good thing. I’ve never blocked anybody. Have you ever blocked anybody? I’ve muted. I’m a muter not a blocker. Okay. Like how much muting have you done? Less than a dozen people in my life. Okay. So this is not a regular occurrence. The reason, and again, Danielle, if the block button got you through, more power to you, and I know that there’s a difference between the blocking and the muting. Yeah. When you, when you kick the, the wall between you and your brother’s room and he’s in there, then you have the added benefit of him knowing that you just put a hole in the wall. But if he’s not in there, you just, you just got some anger out. That’s the difference between a block and a mute. Well, and also if you’re talking about Twitter, I think I’m right about this, if you block someone, they cannot see your tweets and they cannot include, they can’t tweet about you. Like they can’t like put you in their tweets. Oh, that’s nice. But I know that they can’t see your tweets anymore. A mute just means that you can’t see anything that they say. So there’s a few, like the reason I, again, this is a little bit different probably, for a public figure. Yeah. But, blocking is in one sense, it can be, because they know that it happened, it can be seen- It can be offensive. as an act- Like literally an act of offense. Yeah. It is defensive, but it’s often interpreted as an act of aggression, even though it’s not. But because people, it can be incendiary, I guess it’s what I’m saying. And so if you want to just ignore the fire, you mute. If you want to, you know. The mute is more about your experience only. Yeah. Right. And so that’s the only reason I haven’t blocked anybody. But then if you don’t want people, I like what you, it is a good point though. If you don’t want someone, I guess, on Twitter, dragging your name into a conversation, then the block is effective with that. For sure. You know, in general, I just wanna big up boundaries. Mm. Saying, oh, that what, you know, you’re walking through your life. And you’re have, there’s certain types of interactions that you can control, how much people penetrate your boundaries. Sometimes you can’t. But when you can, it’s good to just take a moment and assess, like, what about, you know, “Where do I draw the line with this relationship?” On social media or real life, you know? It’s just, it’s good to say, you know, I am empowered to say, “I need to draw the line here.” Hmm. Or there, or wherever it may be. Agreed. Danielle. Let’s hit one more. Hey, Rhett and Link. This is Jake, from Illinois. And I could not survive my teenage years without school assemblies. Quite literally. Because when I was about a freshman or sophomore, we had a school assembly talking about the dangers of getting out of your car when light poles, or telephone poles rather, fall and you’re in your car. Because we had a girl that actually got out of her car when this happened. And she’s lucky the wires weren’t live still because otherwise she would’ve got electrocuted and died. But she lived, and she, along with some other professionals, gave a assembly and informed the students what to do, if that was to ever happen to them. Fast forward like two years later, maybe a year later. And me and my friends decided to go storm chasing. And sure enough, the telephone poles that we were driving by, start falling like dominoes. And we get lucky. And our car is right in between two that fall. So we’re trapped in between two, can’t go anywhere. And because of the education that we got at this school assembly, we knew to stay in the car and would just wait till help got there to help us out. And it was a wild experience. I was very scared, but hey, I survived my teenage years. Thanks school assemblies, I’ll never forget that. Wow, Jake. You gotta pay attention to those school assemblies, man. And now Jake needs to have a school assembly where he tells people not to go storm chasing. Right? Well, I mean, I don’t know. Cause if, well. The thing about the wires fallin’ on your car, is that if you step out, you’re creating, you’re completing the circuit with the ground and it’s gonna go through you. It’s trying to get to the ground. Hoo wee. Wow. So, I think that’s a great way to end this discussion, is by reminding people, if you’re in a car with a rogue power line draped over you, don’t get out of the car. Wait for help to come. Take it from Jake. Do you remember anything from a school assembly? Only thing I remember from a school assembly is that one from the prom. Oh yeah. The, where the, the guy would come in and show all, slideshow. Do they still do that? Slideshow of- Intoxicated people. Drunk driving? Who then have been maimed. Good killed. God there’s things I cannot get outta my mind. Yeah. And I gotta say it, right now. It was effective. I wasn’t about to drive drunk. Uh-uh. Because I wasn’t even- Especially on a moped. cause I wasn’t even drinking. But like, yeah man. Yeah. Like I think any time I’m faced with the opportunity to drive while intoxicated, which is not often. If you think about that, that’s good. Schools have got it. The first thing comes to mind is, “This is really stupid, don’t do this.” And the second thing is, “That doggone school assembly in 1996 before the prom.” Mm hmm. I’m gonna give a rec, but first I just wanna give a teaser to next week’s “Ear Biscuit”. Rhett’s gonna… How do I, how do I put this? Well I dunno. I’m, there’s gonna be a big episode next week. Teaser. Where Rhett’s gonna unleash some news, that, you know honestly? I think it’d be good for us to process it together. Okay. So, be sure to come back next week. And I will say that- For some news. I won’t be, this won’t be breaking the seal, if you, you know, follow me on social media. Right. So you’re gonna, you probably already know about this. You probably already know about it right now, actually. If you know about his project. Yeah. But we’re gonna talk all about that. Why it’s happening. His personal project. We’re going all the details next week, here on “Ear Biscuits”. Hashtag “Ear Biscuits”, let us know what’s going on. I’ll leave you with a rec. You rec’d this to me. You may have rec’d it on the podcast. I think I did, but I can’t remember. I have to rec this ’cause I just, I finally got around to watching it a few nights ago. The documentary called, “Beauty is Embarrassing” about the artist, Wayne White. If you’re a creative person and you want to just, this is just a profile of an artist, who just his, he’s just got this artistic ethos about him, that’s just very inspiring. He designed a lot of the puppets for PeeWee’s Playhouse. Did a lot of other things. He’s an eclectic creator of art. And it’s just a fun podcast, to just like, be introduced to Wayne White. Podcast? I said podcast, I’m just- It’s not a podcast. It’s a documentary. Yeah. Yeah, it’s just like an hour, you know, an hour and a half, get it on Amazon Prime. Very inspiring. Very inspiring character. Yep. “Beauty is Embarrassing.” If you’re into artistic profiles, this is a fun one. Thank you for your voicemails. Keep leaving them, ask us questions, participate in the prompts that we put out on social media. Tell us what you think, what you want, what you fear, what you love. ♪ 1-888-EARPOD1 ♪ And you might get featured at the end of an episode, just like right now. So basically I’m just gonna say, I could not have survived my teenage years without Cheez Whiz. Rhett, I know you know what that one means. Hi, Rhett and Link. I could not have survived my teenage years without scrambled Pay-Per-View channels. If you know, you know. Hey Rhett and Link. Long time listener, first time caller. To answer your prompt, the “What could I not live without as a teenager?” I’d have to say you guys. It’s kind of cheesy, but I’ve been watching you for a long time since I was real little, about seven. And I’ve really loved growing up with you guys. And you’ve been like parental figures to me. But if you wanted a real answer, pornography. To watch more “Ear Biscuits”, click on the playlist on the right. To watch the previous episode of “Ear Biscuits”, click on the playlist to the left. And don’t forget to click on the circular icon to subscribe. If you prefer to listen to this podcast, it’s available on all your favorite podcast platforms. Thanks for being your mythical best.