Today we’re the food judges, jury, and executioners. – Let’s talk about that. (cheerful music) Good Mythical Morning. – Listen up, all you TikTok chefs and Twitter trolls. You think it’s funny to make the most horrendous foods known to humankind and then put ’em on the internet for everybody to cringe at. – And you gotta stop, because we cannot take it anymore. – Yeah, the Mythical crew, they keep making us try these food crimes that you’re concocting, and we don’t wanna eat anymore food crimes! Our stomachs are crying for help! I mean, just listen. – Help! Help, please, help me! – Help. Help. Oh, help! – I’m a stomach. Help! – Help me. This is your stomach talking, listen to me. – I want to. – Your stomach sounds a lot like you. – Well of course it does, it’s my stomach. Yours sounds like a little girl. You got a little girl stomach? – I don’t think so. But you know what, there would be absolutely no problem if I had a little girl stomach. I would be proud of it. – With everything you eat, I wonder how that little girl… (crew laughs) is doing. – [Stevie] It’s time for… – [Rhett] Food Crimes! Don’t Cook the Crime if You Can’t Do the Time. – [Stevie] As you both know, a food crime is a disgusting dish that someone dreamt up, made, and for some reason decided to share on the internet. – Stevie. – [Stevie] Yeah? – Is that you, or is that your stomach talking? – Stevie, what does your stomach sound like? – [Stevie] My stomach is actually very loud. And, oh, sorry, you’re wanting me to imitate it now? – No, just give her the soapbox. Let your stomach talk. – [Stevie] No, no, I’m full right now. I’m full just before this episode where you’re about to eat gross things, yeah. We’ll see if it comes up. – I thought your stomach might sound like all the way down. That’s what I was hoping for. – Swallow it all the way down? – [Stevie] All the way down. – There it is, there’s her stomach. See? It doesn’t sound anything like her. – Nope. – [Stevie] We posted a series of face-offs between food crimes, and the Mythical Beasts decided which of each pairing was deserving of more jail time. The Mythical Kitcheneers have recreated all of those dishes, and you will taste them and guess which one the Mythical Beasts thought was worse each round. Points escalate, and the loser will have to eat a surprise super food crime created by the Mythical Kitchen. – Okay. Let’s do this. (rock music) – [Stevie] First up, we’ve got two misguided attempts at incorporating fruit into party food. The first comes from The Vulgar Chef, AKA Kyle Marcoux, a friend of Mythical Chef Josh, and a man who prides himself on making bizarre dishes. This is the glizzberry. And the second dish is from the Twitter account effed up foods, which is self-explanatory, the watermelon pizza. – [Link] Watermelon pizza… – Okay, so what’s going on with the glizzberry here? It says it’s a hot dog inserted into a strawberry, with mayo on top, sprinkled with graham crackers. Yes, that’s mayonnaise, and there’s a hot dog inside. Let’s watch the original video how this thing was made. – Okay. It seems, oh, gosh. – That is just a straight-up dog in there. – So that was the reveal, and then, yeah, you start that way, you create a pipe, a strawberry pipe. – This is vulgar. – And then you pipe on some stuff, yeah. – You never know, man. Listen, I don’t like to judge it until I eat it. – So that is a big glob of mayo? Oh my gosh, look at that! This is… – It’s a booty. – [Link] It’s a booty with, it looks like it’s turtle heading. – Yeah. Mine’s not quite as booty-like. – [Link] Oh my gosh. – Well okay, I guess it is. – All right. – Dink it. – Clutching glizzies with the fellas. – We’re gonna get… (crew laughs) – It’s sweet. It’s tangy. – Hot dog’s doing a lot of the lifting here, and, actually it’s kinda dragging things down. – That’s bad. – To be honest with you. I was hoping there may be something redeeming in the way the flavor combination happened. I’m trying to give everything a chance. – [Link] Nothing. – Over here, this is simple, though. This is just watermelon pizza. Right? – Yeah, but I still wanna see how it was made. Oh, it starts with a watermelon. Coulda guessed that. See, but then you’re just treating it like a normal ol’ pizza. A little stop motion. Oh, and you’re baking it for a second. There might be something to this. – All right, let’s find out. Dink it. Cooked watermelon. – This is nice. Sink it. The amount of water in a watermelon never ceases to surprise me. – I thought it would dry out a little bit. It’s better than a strawberry with a hot dog inside of it. – You can put pineapple on a pizza, can you put watermelon under a pizza? – Okay, but the question is not which one did we like more, but which one do we think that you Mythical Beasts, when presented with these two ideas, thought was more of a food crime. – Worse. Grosser. – Are you talking to yourself? – Negative, Link. – Yep. – ‘Cause I don’t wanna eat the thing they prepared, I actually need to compete, I need to swallow this, wait. Surely we did. Okay, I’m ready. – [Stevie] Surely. Three, two, one. – Whoa! – If it’s not this, I mean- – It’s gotta be that one, there’s a hot dog in the freaking middle of a strawberry. – [Stevie] 66% of the Mythical Beasts thought that the glizzberry was a bigger food crime. – And you know what? It is. You are right. We have proven it right here, live. (rock music) – [Stevie] These next dishes take seafood to sweet places it should never go. On Rhett’s side is the sushi pancake from TikTok user Boys Who Can Cook. – No you can’t. – Can you? No. – [Stevie] And on Link’s, the vanilla shrimp Oreo from subreddit StupidFood. – Yeah, that’s stupid food. You got that right. Okay, let’s see how the pancake was made. – Well I can guess, I bet you they, nope. I was already wrong. Thought they put the sushi down first. They put the pancake down first. – Yeah, it’s just like when you put bananas in. And then it all cooks down. – Mm-hm. Then you put that on it, and then you eat it, and you’re very proud of yourself. – Y’all making the boys look bad. Come on, now, Boys Who Can Cook. – There is a savory, like I went to a Korean barbecue place, and they had like… – There is a seafood pancake. – Savory seafood pancakes. – It is a thing that happens. – A lotta onions. A lotta onions in a pancake. It’s like very little cake in those things. And I wasn’t a fan. But I’ma get this a little, I’ma give it a try, you know? It’s got the… – Guess I’ll just go in there. Gotta make sure you get a roll. – The seaweed. I don’t know why I took it off the fork to then eat it, but I did. – ‘Cause you brought the fork. That’s how you get it to you. – I brought the fork, yeah. The fork brought it to me, and then the hand fed myself. – It’s not as bad as you think it might be. It is definitely not as good as a normal pancake, or as good as a savory seafood pancake. But, the fact that it kinda cooked down? I mean, Link’s making it look like he hates it, but- – No I’m not. I’m just not sending that on my internal journey. – Right. How about this one? I think I know how this was made. But let’s just confirm. – [Link] Now we don’t have a video, we just have a picture for that reason. Because… (crew laughs) ‘Cause you would just pull it apart, you put a shrimp in there, and then you put it back together. And you take a nice picture. – I broke it in two places. – How could this not be dumb? – This is so dumb. – Good gracious. ItalnStalln did this one, huh? Oh, just commented on it. “I could forgive doing this with a regular classic or doublestuffed prep, but a line was crossed when the best type of Oreo, the golden, was desecrated.” – Oh, the best Oreo is the golden? – I think it keeps the color palette more consistent. I like this choice. – It’s weirdly not as bad as you think it might be, again. Something about the cooked shrimp, it’s kind of a mild shrimp flavor. They’re actually really similar. So really, it’s what seemed like a worse idea. What do people not want, like what do people wanna protect more? Pancakes or Oreos? – This is a toss-up. – [Stevie] Three… – All right. – [Stevie] Two, one. – That’s her stomach. I guess we agree again. Yeah, it just looks so much grosser. – It’s just one shrimp, all just sitting there. – And it’s just so gross, but like, it didn’t ruin either one for me. – No. – So, I hope we’re right, and you were wrong. – [Stevie] 61% of the Mythical Beasts thought that the vanilla shrimp Oreo was the bigger food crime. – Yes. – I don’t actually know if you’re right. – You’re not. You’re wrong, I already said it. – We interrupt this episode of Good Mythical Morning to tell you about a new video coming out tomorrow, Saturday morning on the Rhett & Link channel. – Watch if you dare. (exciting, percussion-heavy music) (rock music) Before you look down here, I want you to look right here. Check out this tee shirt, it’s our annual Earth Day tee. It benefits the Earth, ’cause a portion of proceeds from all these tees that we sell will be donated to 350.org, which is one of our favorite environmental charities. It’s available in dark chocolate, natural, and I’m sporting sage today. – Oh, sage. Mm. – It’s the Mythical logo, redesigned to kinda look like you love the Earth. Or you live in a Ewok village. – Hold on, we don’t want ’em to look like you love the Earth, I mean, if you love the Earth, if we assume you do… – You wanna show that you love the Earth by having this Earth design on you. – Okay, that’s, whatever floats your boat. – It’s only available until April 22nd, which is Earth Day, at 11:59 PM Pacific Time, so grab it while you can, and help the Earth, because, you kinda like the Earth, don’t you? – You look like you do, at least. – You look like it. Mythical.com. – [Stevie] Okay, next up we’ve got the SpaghettiOs PB and mayo sandwich from Eli of elis_kitchen on TikTok. – You stinker. – [Stevie] And popcorn and hot sauce ice cream from TikTok user Craftwytch. – I mean… – Let’s start over here. – How does this happen? – [Link] It’s frozen? – [Rhett] Can we see how it did happen? – So you take the SpaghettiOs, put ’em in a bag. – Yeah, you flatten ’em out. – You flatten ’em out with the back of your hand. – You gotta make the bread. – You freeze ’em. – That’s called bread making. – Then you pull it out. Yep, I’m tracking so far. Ooh, that’s thin. – That’s nice. – And then, oh, and then you slice it. Okay, and that’s what they did. And then what? – Peanut butter. – Okay. All right. – It’s tough to, and mayonnaise. – Mayonnaise. Does it have to be Hellmann’s? Hope not. I’m a Duke’s man. – And then you just… – You pull it apart, and then you hold it up to the camera as if you’re gonna eat it, but you’re not stupid, so you’re never gonna actually eat it. – And you post it on the internet, and these are the following comments. “Most normal meal in Ohio.” “Best meal in Ohio.” “Midnight snack in Ohio.” “Normal Ohio lunch.” “Best food from Ohio.” “Only in Ohio.” “Most normal breakfast in Ohio.” “Most normal lunch in Ohio.” Those are all different comments. People have strong foods about what they think about Ohio food. Strong foods. – Strong foods about what they think. – Opinions. Ohio opinions. – [Link] It’s frozen. I don’t bite frozen things. – Bite it with the side. I’m biting it with the front, though. – I can’t. I can’t… It has to melt in my mouth. – [Rhett] Okay, stick it in your mouth, and we’ll wait for it to melt. – Why would you want a frozen sandwich? – You wouldn’t. – Does that make it dessert? – You wouldn’t. No one wants this. No one asked for it, not even the people of Ohio. You know? – Peanut butter and mayo is not a bad combination. – It’s very good on just regular white bread. – Like, I can’t bite anything frozen. Disqualified. – Okay, well, that’s an interesting take. – See, this- – This feels like the kinda ice cream that we would’ve made on that episode of that incredible television show that we made, Inside Eats, on the Food Network. (relaxed music) Would you mind if we developed our own flavors to see if we can get right to the line of what’s acceptable in ice cream? – It tastes like gravy that’s turnt. (crew laughs) May it rest in peace. See, I can just donkey lip this. – It’s got a nice smell to it. – People were, ooh, that’s spicy, interrogating Craftwytch. “Was it good?” At every turn, Craftwytch was standing by this concoction. “I love spicy and sweet, and it does it perfectly with a little salt. Tangy and flavorful with a kick.” It’s definitely tangy, flavorful, and it has a kick. – I quite enjoy it. – It’s a lot better than that. – We don’t even need a deliberation on this. We both know. I wanna do a little wager. We both know that this is the bigger food crime. But whoever, let’s make this interesting. Whoever gets to the exact percentage of the Mythical Beasts who preferred this gets the points for this round. Because we’ve been tying, it’s not interesting. – Yeah, and we’re both gonna vote for this, right? – We’re both voting for this, so let’s do a, Stevie’ll do a three two one. – [Stevie] Gets to exact, or gets the closest? – The closest. – And you can go over. – You can go over, it’s just the closest. – Okay. – [Stevie] Three, two, one. – 81. – 79. – Ohoho! Whoa, ohoho! What? – [Stevie] Eighty… three percent. – Yeah! – We were both so close! – Of the Mythical Beasts thought the SpaghettiOs PB and mayo sandwich was the bigger food crime. – Wow, that was a fun round. I got a little rush. (crew laughs) (rock music) – [Stevie] And for the final round, some surprises. The dish on Rhett’s side was posted by a now deleted Scottish Twitter account- – Oh, they deleted the account? In Scotland? – [Stevie] Which highlights the trick in trick or treat, and I’ll let you discover the trick yourselves. – Razor blade, right? (crew chuckles) – [Stevie] And, that’s a different kind of crime, the dish on Link’s side is another horror creation from The Vulgar Chef, and again, you’ll have to taste it to discover what’s inside. – But it just looks like a cookie and a chocolate covered apple. – Now I know we have a lot of different food opinions, but I’m betting that we have a similar food opinion about apple. Candy apples. – Big letdown. – Oh, yeah. They’re the worst. – Yep. Because apples are always a letdown. – You go to a candy shop, and there’s like just, they’re beautiful, and then it’s like “Yeah, but there’s still an apple on the inside.” You know what I’m saying? They’re always a letdown. Don’t get ’em. Let’s put ’em out of business. Let’s put the candy apple people out of business. – Well we’ve already shut down the Scottish account. – Y’all put something fun in there, we’ll start eating it again. – Don’t take a deep, dark bite, boy. – All right. I’m gonna cob it. – You’re gonna cob it? – Yeah. – Cob it and knob it. (onions crunch) – Yep, yep. I guess I walked right into that one. – Those are onion. Those are onion! – Well, you made it interesting. The chocolate does help. – The chocolate covers a world of hurt, but I’ve done this enough to (indistinct) get it down. – [Stevie] Guys. That was a chocolate covered onion. (crew laughs) – Really? – Okay, well, surprise, surprise. Okay, now we have cookies. – And these cookies look great. They look fine. – Sure they’re just normal. – They actually look like they’re done to perfection. – They actually smell totally normal. (indistinct) the look on Trevor’s face. (crew chuckles) – He’s over there giggling. Just giggling. – Like a Scottish trick-or-treater. – Okay. (cookies crunch) What is that? – Is that ham? (crew chuckles) – [Stevie] Close. – Fake bacon? – Spam. – [Stevie] It is Spam. – It’s a slice of Spam, hidden in the middle of a cookie. What do they call it? – [Stevie] Spam chocolate chip cookie. (crew laughs) – If you’re gonna be so creative with your dish, come up with a better name. Like, come on, guys, we can come up with a name off the top of our head. – Spamkie. – Spookie. See? See what we did? – Both of those are better. – Spamkie. – Okay. – Not bad, as that. – But which one seems grosser upon, and listen, this matters, right? Because… – We either tie and we both have to eat the nasty, or I lose, and I have to eat the nasty. – [Stevie] Well… – Oh, it’s… – The points escalate, so. – I can still win? – You can still win. Hold on, which one’s grosser? – And if we agree after we voted, then… – You have the option to change. – No. We’ll do the percentage thing. – Okay, new rule, huh? – Well we did the last round, you said it was fun, you were exhilarated. – “You said it was fun.” “You said it was fun last time.” – [Stevie] Three, two, one. – Gotta be this one. – Yep, that’s what I think. So we agree. So, all right, let’s go with percentage of people that we think said this one was the worst. – Okay, all right, okay. – Three, two- – Hold on, she does the countdown. – [Stevie] Three, two, one. – 53. – 58. – [Stevie] 72% of the Mythical Beasts thought the chocolate covered onion was the bigger food crime. – Ha! Yeah. Yeah. So did I take it? – That really sucks. (crew laughs) – No, I love it. – You have no idea how much that sucks. – Me, neither. But, we are gonna find out, ’cause you’re gonna bring in the nasty concoction. – Oh, Rhett, my sweet cheese, my pal, my good time boy. – Just pudding, huh? – This is my special paste. So, oh my god! (Trevor laughs) (crew laughs) I didn’t think he was gonna take that big of a bite! – What is it? What is it?! (Trevor laughs) – [Rhett] Trevor! Trevor! – I can’t! I can’t! – What…? – Trevor, what’s wrong with you? Are you from Ohio? – [Stevie] It’s beef extract, tamarind paste, anchovy paste, citric acid, served with a spoon. – It’s not even a… – It’s not even a thing. It’s just a Turbo thing. – All right, bye, guys. – Well, I’m glad I made your day, Trevor. – You went for it, dude. And for that, I commend you. – Thanks for subscribing and clicking that bell. – You know what time it is. – Hi, this is Zoe from South Carolina, third degree Society member, and I have a little ditty for you. ♪ I went to MythiCon, I got this little pin ♪ ♪ I’m putting it on my board, but first it’s time to spin ♪ ♪ The Wheel of Mythicality ♪ – Wow. – Catchy. – Record deal, coming in soon! Click the top link to watch us match the crew to their weird Notes apps. Weird Notes apps notes. – Yep, that’s it. – In Good Mythical More. – Oh, gosh. And to find out where the wheel’s gonna land. – [Rhett] We can all do our part to protect our planet and make it a little more Mythical. Grab the Make it a More Mythical World tee for a limited time only at Mythical.com.