Channel: Good Mythical More
YouTube Video ID: kx1VB856Yv4
Episode Post Date: January 7, 2026
Episode Number: 2953
Transcript
How obscene did ancient graffiti really get? Welcome to Good Mythical More. We're gonna be, uh. Warning. Looking at some obscene graffiti from the past. It could be obscene, warning. Trying to guess if it's real or fake, and I will let you know. Let, let it, let me know, I already know. I have, I have a confession to make about something that I did, and I'm going to run it by you, when I'm emotionally prepared, which will be in a little bit, uh, and you can tell me if, if you think I did a good job or if I was a bad boy. Oh. You know, I had a social. I'll judge your actions. I had a social situation, I don't have a lot of those. Huh? I don't have a lot of social situations. Alright, I, well, I'm proud of you so far, far. I did something that you might have done and I think. Hey, don't, nuh-uh. No, I, I, I, I stand by my choice, but I wanna see if you agree with me. Um, before you get into the real or fake ones on the card. We're gonna, I'm gonna show you some actually real ones and then, uh, have you try and guess what they translate to. So. Alright. This is graffiti that, um, is from the Roman Empire, uh, from the city of Pompeii, and it's approx-, it's, let's show Link the first one. Uh, it's, uh, from the first century AD. Um, so yeah, what do you think this says? Well, it, I'm tempted to think that's English. Yeah, I see. Exhibit now. Exhibit. November. Infinity. And then it says. This is written on the wall of a house. Mommy, funny. This is the home of a funny Mommy. Mommy, funny. Do you see mommy funny on the, the left there? Mommy. Funny. It wasn't funny when she got completely like frozen underneath lava. That's what happened to the people at Pompeii. Mm-hmm. Vesuvius, 79 AD. I just know that off the top of my head. It's not in the notes. Okay. Um. I didn't ask how to pronounce Vesuvius. Of course you didn't. Prior to this. That's my best guess right there. Mommy funny. Um, this is something that. It's a journal entry. That maybe someone could write on your, uh, house on, on, on each of your houses based on what you do on a daily basis for a living. Oh, mommy funny. Yeah. Yeah, we're already there. We're already funny mommies. He. Be, be cool and chill. Mm-hmm, yeah. Cool and chill dudes live here. He overindulged in food. Oh, it's, that was why he died. Oh, died here, I mean, died here. Okay. He overindulged in food. Yeah, he overindulged in food. Well, I mean. And that killed him. Well, unclear. It's on the side of a house, but it does. Do we have to dwell on that? Yeah. Apparently we do forever. Wow. Um, here's one. Really different artistic styles here. This is from when. Same time period. And, and also Pompeii. These are all Pompeii. Clouds. Uscu. I think this is a menu. This is written on the wall of an eatery. Ha, I could have been archeologist, me and Dr. What's his name out there in the field with our hats? No gaunt, wonder what. Getting slightly intellectually aroused, finding new things from the past. So. Making connections. That disc right there is that where like where you'd order a bagel and then it would, you'd put it right there. Uh, it's not a glory hole. It's, it's a very shallow one. It's, it's not a restaurant glory hole. No. It's a, it's a shallow. It's how they hung it up. It's a bagel hole. It says nugant that, that's what nugat used to be called, nugant. Something tells me we're not gonna be able to guess what it is. What is it? What is it? A yeah. I also cannot pronounce a lot of a lot of this. Asellina's girls, including Zmyrina, ask for the election of Caio Lollius Fuscus as duumvir, which is a Roman elected official. So. So it's like a political. What does it mean? It's like a political, it's like these girls, including these two support, this person. Okay, so it's not a menu, it was just on the wall of a restaurant. Yeah. Well, hmm. Call me unaroused. Alright. This one is. Wow. Nice. That's, that's a caricature. It's a caricature of the emperor. Now there's also that text that's above it. That's what you're guessing. And this is uh. I don't see. A wall, on a wall in a Roman villa. Big nose. Yeah, big honker. His nose is big, but he knows so small. That would be English. Mm. I don't see any words, do you. Like up to the left? Uh, when you're looking at it left, left. You gotta have a keen eye for this kind of thing and be. Oh. Be out there. Well, for the viewers, we'll make sure not to crop that out, but I believe it might be cropped out right now. Okay. Uh, so, uh, give us a hint. It's probably making fun of his nose. Right? It's, it's, it's a little bit more like literal than that. It, it is, it is um. Baldy. It is describing the image. Side profile of a bald man with a big nose and a leaf crown. Big nose Caesar. It says. With a necklace. This is Rufus. Oh, that's Rufus. Which if that, that guy's name is Rufus, why are the other people's name Asellina, Zmyrina? Well, some names stuck around and some names didn't. Yeah, I guess. Okay, so now that you've seen the real ones. Okay. You have a stack of cards there. On each one is written, some translated, Roman graffiti, but some are real and some are made up by the writers. So you have to decide. Chie, I hope your hemorrhoids rubbed together so much that they hurt worse than when they ever have before. I think this is fake because I thinks hemorrhoids are the result of a modern American diet. Yeah. The base, the basic American diet bad and yeah, they used, they didn't strain back then. They didn't have squatty potties. Fake. Fake. Hmm. Next, I made bread. Yes. I'm sorry, you're correct. Oh, yep, I knew it. You are incorrect. Oh no. I was listening, paying attention, gave you the right answer. Uh, you are incorrect. So that was real. Hemorrhoids rubbed together. And this is all in Pompeii. Or, and this could be anywhere. This is. Yes. Oh, this is also just Pompeii. Pompeii was so literate. Risque in Pompeii. I wish that Volcano hadn't hit him. I made bread. No, I don't care. I made bread on April 19th. Too soon. What? That's real. Hold on, no, that's a writer, 'cause I did, we have a writer who made bread on April 19th. I, I hope this is real. It's real. Okay. Yes. I feel like graffiti was so much better back then. This is, this is it, right? I'm, I'm gonna, I'm gonna keep this in my back pocket. And I don't mean this, I mean this idea. Yeah. Because I get chance if I ever graffiti, it's gonna be things like that. But you'll never make bread, so come up with something better than that. No, no, no, I and that's the irony. Oh. It's a lie. Got it, it's a joke. You're like Banksy. It's a lot. One more, and then I gotta hear your thing. Linksy. I sure hope that I'll. You could be Linksy, no one will know who it is, except now that we said it. Well, we beep this out. Fine, I'll just hear your story. You wanna hear my story? I hope that volcano never erupts. That's fake. That's writers. I sure hope that volcano never erupts. Yeah, that's. Okay, let me tell you what I did. That's funny though. Let me tell you what I did. Uh, I was in North Carolina. I went to see a movie. I went to see that movie. I can't, I, I recommend it. My wife wasn't so big on it. It was called Sentimental Value, it probably slipped through your radar. It wasn't, anybody see it? Anybody see it? Okay, a couple people, um. Is this about the Coke machine again? Hey, hey, quiet now, you don't. Are you kidding? Hey, I didn't say that. I didn't say that. So I went to a North Carolina theater, and I'm in this movie. Quiet now. And this movie is, uh, this is a slow movie. It is a, it's a thinker. It's emotional. It's called Sentimental Value for goodness sake, right? This is not an action packed movie, this is a movie where you need to be able to hear everything that's being said. Also, it's kind of the movie that you would expect that the people who were getting there would get there on time, not 20 minutes into the movie after like some key events had already happened. Okay. Four people walk in and they walk to the back row and they sit down. Where are you? I am in the middle of the theater. It's not a very big theater 'cause it's not a very popular movie. We're probably talking 10 rows, you know what I'm saying? How did you even know they walked in? If you're in the middle of the theater and they're walking in behind you. Because they walked in from the front, like they enter from the front and they go up stadium seating and they sit in the back. Yeah. Um, and that's how most theaters work these days. You kind of come in and then you, um. Quiet, quiet now. So, uh, this, and if they, and if they had come through back, I would've known that they were there because they began to have a conversation at regular volume with each other. Hmm. Regular volume conversation. Now, when they began to talk, it was during a scene in which the main characters were at a party. And there were people talking in the house, and the first thing I thought was, this is some good surround sound. Oh. Because it really sounds like there's people in the back of the theater talking at full volume, but I know that this thing. It's, it's paid actors. 12.1 or whatever. It's, they su, they're called supplemental actors. And uh, but then all of a sudden the scene got very serious and the two characters went into a room together and I was like, oh, they're still talking full. Oh, that is those people. They talked for another minute or two. I leaned over to my wonderful wife, Jessie, and I said, I'm gonna say something. She was like, don't say anything. And I was like, I'm gonna say something. I'm I, and I was like, I'm gonna give 'em one more minute. They continued talking and I was, again, there's like four or five rows of people between me and them, and I'm thinking, why aren't y'all saying something? And again, I'm from North Carolina, but now I live in Los Angeles and I know that our standard for everybody staying quiet, keeping their phones off, it's a little bit different. This is where movies are made. Okay, I get it. It's a little bit different in North Carolina. We take it a little too seriously out here. Or we say we stay seated during the credits. I didn't realize that until I moved here. I don't do that. And got up and was like, oh, we sit here. Now, a minute has passed. It's time for you to speak. And I. Did you? Turned around and at this volume I said, quiet. Yes, yes, yes, buddy, you did it. Now, this isn't the first time I've done this, by the way. You were angry. You were angry. I've said shut up before, I. Quiet. I've done shh. Hush now. But it was so overwhelming and so inappropriate. Quiet. Quiet. Yes. Um, I will say I was already a little bit testy because of the Coca-Cola freestyle machine. Okay. Hold on, hold on. Here we go. Hey, hold on, we'll get back to that in one second. We'll get back to that in one second. They continued to talk at full volume. After you quiet. Did they acknowledge you at all? So somebody said, uh, something they like, there was a, there was. Like a talk back. There was a little talk back and I was like, oh my, what am I dealing with here? Mm-hmm. Yeah. So now. And so you're faced with a choice. So then I told Jesse, I was like, okay, well I'm getting up and going back there now. Yeah. I'm gonna get up and I'm gonna go back there and then. And no one else is, no one is. No one is saying anything. I'm missing important parts of the movie. Jessie, she like pulls me in close, she says, you cannot go back there. You go talk to the manager. There can't be a, you you might get into a fight we can't have Rhett McLaughlin gets into fight at movie theater. Okay. She reminded me who I was, and, uh. You, you, you've, the one thing that you've, I'm so proud of you so far. Uhhuh. But the one thing you did was, don't state your intentions. Just whenever something occurs to you, just let 'em have it. Well, here's the thing. Don't run things by your wife. She made a good point later when she said, you just yelled quiet to someone in a theater who continued to talk. Yeah. Do you think that going back there is gonna end well? So. It's, it's true. At that point, I damn it, I'm gonna go talk to the manager and so I went out and I run real fast out there, because, I mean, my arms were hanging behind me because I didn't wanna miss this movie. It was really good. And I was like, I saw an employee and I was like, there's people in theater 13 on the back row. They're talking regular volume. I told them to be quiet and they're not listening. I'm not a Karen, I just am a concerned citizen. You said that? No, but I implied it and then I ran back to my seat and then I sat back down. They're still talking at full volume. I will say to their credit, within three minutes, three employees show up, but they just come to the front and they just stand there looking. They waited five minutes while these people continued to talk and eventually one of 'em went up there and walked on the back row and said something. And I could have sworn I heard him say, come with me. And then they didn't come with him. And then the people left and I was like, what are we doing now? The movie is not important to me anymore. And they, they start talking less, but they would still talk at times. And I was just like, I guess I'm just gonna have to deal with this because I'm not leaving again. The entire movie goes through. It's getting, this movie is so sad. What are they talking about? I couldn't tell. This movie is so sad and poignant and I'm loving it and we get, there's literally 10 minutes left to go in the movie. We're getting to like the good stuff. The employees come back. Go up to the back and then have an interaction with them where they force them to leave and then they all start leaving very slowly. This is the end of the movie, like I'm trying to be into it and one by one the people are, are leaving now, being forced to leave. Are they teens? I think maybe. I think maybe. Teens. We're talking teens, late teens, early twenties. Grow up. But let's get back to the reason that I was upset. That was it. Did you get a refund? No. Rhett. I thought that maybe something would be different in North Carolina, and I knew that things would be a little bit different. I know people talk at full volume sometimes. Your actions were completely ineffectual. But before the movie, I went to my AMC. You know, I go to AMC, that's what I do. I get into the gold line. I, I get a regular drink and they make it a large, automatically. I get a regular popcorn, they make it a large, automatically. I love it. Not a sponsor. But then I go to the freestyle machine. They don't have caffeine free Diet Coke, they have Fanta. So I was sucking on Fanta. That's why I was upset. Okay, the reason I was upset 'cause I was sucking on Fanta. Because Fanta is the only caffeine free thing in the thing. You didn't think I was gonna bring this gripe with me into 2026, but I'm not just bringing it back. Who didn't think that? We all knew it. We need to unite because I did a little research with the help of Jenna. And what we have found is that, yes, in 2025, they phased out caffeine free Diet Coke from all Coca-Cola freestyle machines at AMC. And there are, there's conflicting information about how this happened, there's something about aluminum supplies, and then there's something about the number of uh, canisters. And then there's something about demand. Apparently there is little demand for caffeine free Diet Coke, and I wanna figure out what's going on because then I know the people, I know who you are. The people that are getting Diet Coke. You're middle-aged people like me. What is wrong with us? What is wrong with you? We need to, listen. Okay. Do you realize you're probably watching 90? What? Are you a matinee person? No, you're watching, you shouldn't have it after 2:00 PM Most of the things that you're watching in the movie theater, you're watching in the evenings, you could have the exact same experience. We, in fact, we proved it on this show. Did we prove that you could taste caffeine or you couldn't taste caffeine? Uh, that you could a little. We tasted it. Yeah. But we said it wasn't better. You can't taste it. I remember better, but you could taste the difference. Yeah, you could taste. You can't really taste the difference enough to care. Okay, that really undermines this point. But what I would like is if you're the kind of person like me that wants to have a caffeine free experience, a diet Coke experience in the Coca-Cola freestyle machine, we need to come together and we need to offer some feedback, and so there are two links in the description. Oh my God. One, is to the AMC theater's feedback contact form where you can file a complaint. And one is to the Coca-Cola people, where you can also file a complaint. We need so many complaints. We need complaints, we need to overwhelm these people so they cannot say no. And while you're at it. Did you just turn this into, call your senator moment? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I, you know, I don't really like to get political, but listen. Call your local representative. Hey, here's the thing. Put that in the description. We need to band together on this. And you need to, we need to get caffeine free drinks back into the machines. And if we're, while we're at it, just as a little PS, ask them to get diet, uh, caffeine free Dr. Pepper because it does exist. And if we could get that. That's not even Coke though. Hey, uh hmm. We will figure out a way. Okay. Okay, we don't have to get Diet Dr. Pepper. We need to get caffeine free, diet Coke. And if you pull this off, I'm telling you right now to the people of Coca-Cola, I will become the face for free of Coca-Cola freestyle. If you want me on every single machine in America, I'll do it for free. If you would just put caffeine free Diet Coke back in there. That's all I need to say. So you ended with pitching yourself for an endorsement. You said, I have a story. For free. Then you, then you, then there's links in the description and now you're pitching yourself for an endorsement. Life size. Alright, okay. On both sides of each machine. And I'll be like looking around like, ah, I'll be in if what. You need to look sleepy. No, I look excited. No, you need to be look like you're. You don't need the caffeine to be excited. We're watching movies together. I think you need to be in pajamas. I'll do whatever you want me to do. If you want me to give a kidney to somebody, I will consider it. I will consider it. I know it's a little counterintuitive that. So you're saying. You're asking people for a Diet Coke and you're gonna give a kidney, but. I am just saying I need somebody to be on my team here. Okay. There's no reason There shouldn't be demand that I, if you put it in the machines, if you, if you dispense it, people will drink it. They will drink. If you dispense, they will drink. I, we need to work on the slogan, but I'm just saying go it. Click on the link. Open up multiple tabs. Use fake names. I'm sorry, but I think what you're gonna have to do is you're gonna have to go on a caffeine education plan, 'cause people just don't think enough about caffeine like you do. I think that there, you need to start putting like. Think about your choices. Like, like the, you know how the sign. Yeah. The signs on cigarette packs, I think you gotta have one of those on the freestyle. We need a person that just looks like they just can't go to sleep. Right. That's what I'm saying. Yeah. You're in your pajamas. When you click on it, anything you click. Don't let this be you. No, it's when you're about to click on a regular Coke. There's a picture of a just a old person. You, that's you. That's me. That's you, dude. I will do that for free. You're wearing pajamas. I'll do it for free, I'll model. I'll show up. Don't let this be you 3:00 AM. Uh, 20, as long as it's uh, no longer than an eight hour shoot, I don't have. Jason Mimosa. To travel more than 300 miles. Uh, and as, and as long as it's Comfort Plus or higher, I will go any, any anywhere you want. I think this is a great idea, I think on the freestyle machines it should say warning, caffeine will keep you up. I think sales will skyrocket. We gotta send people. Come on y'all. It's gonna, I mean, hey, you see people? And I want, I also want it to have a picture of like, like nasty lungs. Okay. The free in caffeine, the free and freestyle means caffeine free. Could mean caffeine free. If y'all go to the links in the description and click and submit fake names, multiple tabs. Do you feel better now? Yes. Watch the new episode of Role for Mythicality on Mythical Society now. The Sparkle from, from inside the box is, is fabulous. I think I've seen these at the Louvre one time. You saw what now? I saw these at the Louvre. Wait, did Emily? Did I what? Did Vivian rob the Louvre? You don't wanna say that. I don't, I don't do that. I have other people do that.