Do you ever those thoughts where you’re like, “I could do that.” Yeah, intrusive thoughts. Yeah, like when you’re in church and you’re like, “I could go run up on that altar and just like twerk,” or something. To understand the food of our present, we must first understand the food of our past. That’s why we’re recreating some of the most notable meals to our history, and today our taste buds are joining The Mile High Club. I’ve only joined the Mile Low Club. I did it in a bunker. I have a lot of stories like that. I bet you do. But first, we’re recreating first class airline food from the 1950s. It’s time for: “Meals of History!” Emily, we have uncovered an actual menu from a presidential Pan American Airways flight 1951. They actually did this in concert with the fanciest restaurant in Paris at the time, called Maxim’s. Back then, air travel was like only for the rich, right? Pan Am started in the 1920s, a lot of these major airlines did. We’re in 51 right now, just coming off of World War II. We got all these people who got rich off the war effort, Pan Am included, they made a boatload of money and they didn’t have a lot of competitors. So you had people who were going up in the sky, and Pan Am wanted to give them the luxury experience via Maxim’s. So that’s how you get canapes, cheese wafers, people were just hammered drunk. This is Mad Man era, smoking cigarettes, eating filet minjon, lobster American, pommes duchesse. Is Maxim’s related to “Maxim” magazine? God, I hope so. That’d be rad, yeah. And then they start photographing all the stewardesses, and then a bunch of teen boys growing up in the early two thousands got weird ideas about women. Flight attendants back then, they were a lot of women who were working as nurses in the war and needed new jobs, stuff like that. And so, you know, you’ve seen the stereotypes. Of what? The airline stewardesses? Yeah, that was a thing. Or flight attendants. I’m so sorry, I know that correcting you about flight attendants is, you’re allergic to it, but it’s what you call them. It’s not, you don’t say stewardesses. Not anymore, I was in character. That’s not what I say, it’s flight attendant. I just, there’s gonna be more upsetting gender stereotypes throughout this episode. It’s the fifties, I’m sorry. If you can imagine, men were worse. Pan Am officially closed their doors in 1991, that was the last flight. But if you look back throughout history, there are museums dedicated to it because of how important it was. And so this, I mean, really is a moment lost in time because now you can’t even get damn peanuts on an airplane, ’cause the kid, the indoor kids with the allergies. Oh yeah. So you’re gonna, naturally, I mean you’re gonna play the flight, stewardess. Oh, you don’t think I can play a captain? No, you can be captain, just saying like, like Angelina Jolie was a captain in that one movie. But that was, 1950s, you know, there were kind of fewer opportunities. “I’ll do the stewardess, okay? I don’t, I don’t, oh my God. Flight attendant. Am I the bad guy here? Am I the bad guy? I don’t mean to, it’s history, history’s bad. You’re always the bad guy Josh. Oh, stewardess! Hello. I would like you to light my unfiltered cigarette, they say it’s good for you and it opens up the lungs. I don’t have my lighter with me right now, but I can go back and and get it in the, ooh I’m never supposed to tell someone no. I love the Mid-Atlantic accent though, it’s giving very, “The Crown” vibes. Oh, they taught us this in the school. Did they actually? So you went to school to become a Pan Am flight Attendant? Yes, I had to qualify first. Please tell me what the qualifications were. Well, I had to be single, not a problem. Wait, is that? No, no, wait hold up. That’s actually a thing? Yes. Oh God. And then I had to be between 21 and 28 years old. I have a feeling it’s only gonna get worse from here. And I have to be between five two and five eight. Wait, hold on. Yeah, okay, no, no, no. You can stand up, I don’t follow those guidelines, things in the future will improve. Not with air travel, Spirit airlines, my God. But you don’t have to shrink for me. Please, you can stand up, the scoliosis is gonna kill you. Luckily there’s a lot of squatting involved with this job. So I have to just usually do this a lot anyway. No one notices most of the time. And were there other qualifications? Well, we can’t be a whore. The best thing to do in in this job is to get married and then leave the job. That’s the whole goal. I’m betrothed to another. Oh, well of course you are. Yeah. They always are. They always say they are. Yeah, and then. Oh, I forgot one more qualification. Oh God. Don’t be ugly. Ah, yeah. It was the main one, I had to send in a little snapshot. Yeah, times, you know, the more things change the more they stay the same. All right, let’s make some steaks though. I would love to. This is a celebration of air travel. Pan Am was literally the luxury of the sky. What are you doing? What? That face, you’re making like a, you’re making like flight attendant face. You have to do that the whole time? They told me to do that. We had to train very, very extensively. God, I bet. Yes. So the food we’re making today, this is from a 1951 Pan Am flight from New York to Paris. And this is what was called a presidential flight. Pan Am had special distinctions for your most qualified customers. Also Franklin Delano Roosevelt was literally the first president to go, what’s the term? Airplane? man. Yes, it’s aircraft, airplane. FDR was. Fly fly. FDR wings. was the first president Tin can. To fly fly in a wing tin can. It was on a Pan Am flight, so they celebrated him by creating these special flights, these special menus. And they also had the fanciest restaurant in Paris at the time, which you well know, Maxim’s. Yes, it takes a long time to get to that place. I bet. So they actually had chefs from Maxim’s, fanciest restaurant in Paris at the time, making the food. They literally put them on the plane, which to me is absolutely nuttzo. And so the dish we’re starting with today, this is broiled filet minjon, with beurre maitre d’hotel, or maitre d’ butter. Which is called that because the maitre d’, which Emily, in this case, this is you. Oh yes. Would physically make it at the table for customers. So, can you start on the beurre maitre d’hotel? Do you speak French? You seem a very cultured worldly woman, even though I don’t think they let women outta the house in 1951. Well I said I spoke French. Yeah. Can you give me a little bit? I told it a little That’s, almost a sheet of paper. It’s piece of paper, because I always forgot, I always forgot my paper in French class. Could you hack up some these herbs really quickly? I’m gonna start broiling the steaks right here. I don’t know if they were cooking the steaks fresh on the flights, ’cause that seems tough. But they have like ridiculously extensive menus on these. They have like nine starters, like, you know, four soups. It was bonkers. And I really wanna go and say, the turbulence was very, it was rough. Yeah, people just died because. Imagine this. Also seat belts weren’t like a thing. With he turbulence, this was like a huge thing. They had glass cups. Yeah, knives and broilers. Metal cutlery. Sharp China. And the planes flew really low. People smoking stoges the whole time just going. So you’re like, yeah, exactly. Fatalities back then were four times more than they are today, which like isn’t enough. Not to say I wish more people died. I’m just saying, like you’d think more would have than now. I just lubed up these steaks, it’s just very simple filet that we’ve tied off to make that nice, elegant, very French presentation. A lot of the food back then was very French, because that was seen as like the height of luxury. Am I doing this right? Yeah, try and avoid the stems and just do the leaves, but we’ll get there. What are you doing? You just flicked salt in my eye. I’m sorry dude, that’s my bad. Listen, listen, listen. There’s turbulence going everywhere. Yeah, no kidding. We’re flicking salt, it happens. Cigarette ash I don’t need both my eyes for this job at all. Pop them in the boiler. Here, let me get you started on some butter. Scooch over, scooch over. So we’re making a compound butter right now, this is just softened butter. They would’ve simply just boiled the steaks, popped some of this compound butter, or maitre d’hotel butter on there. When you say avoid the stems, how do I avoid the stems? They’re made of stems. Oh no, you just like pick off the leaves. Oh I’m supposed to, what the is this for? Sorry. What do you mean? What is this knife for? Well you use both, you got like hands and a knife. Okay, you get handsy and you use a knife. Yeah. All right, all right, all right, I got it, I got it, I got it. Don’t get handy with me. I’m not getting handsy with the knife! Just do that, chop that, chop that, chop that. Chop that? We’re gonna put some lemon, Seems wasteful. lemon zest in there. No, we’ll use that for like garnish later. Dude, it’s chill, also cooking’s wasteful. You’re making me work on the garnish? You think air travel wasn’t wasteful? Dude, that was it. There was literally an oil embargo. Like the reason Pan Am eventually went under, is ’cause, like, they were trying to do these like, gigantic luxurious flights during an oil embargo, and they just burned themselves into the ground. Really? But, but Pan Am, despite having a knack for luxury, was also the first airline to do an economy class and actually open it up to like normal folks to fly. They opened up an economy class, and British Airlines got so pissed that London banned Pan Am from air travel. And you’re gonna freaking love this story. I know you already know the history ’cause you work for ’em. I love long stories. In the 1940s, they got banned from flying into London. So they tried to fly there, but they couldn’t land, so they had to land in Ireland. Passengers had to then, like, boat to London. But they were all like cold pissed off, and there was a chef at this Irish port who was like, “Yo, let me make you a brand new delicious hot liquored up drink to ease your nerves, called the fricking Irish coffee.” Ooh. Irish coffee was invented because of a Pan Am flight that was banned from London. So the legend goes. But I think that’s cool. I love the Irish. I love the Irish, and boy, do I love the Irish coffee. And apparently it got the name ’cause somebody was like, “hey, is that Brazilian coffee?” And the guy goes, “nay, this is Irish coffee.” That’s me Irish accent. Oh, let me do it as Brad Pitt from Snatch. I consider myself like preternaturally good at being drunk. Preternaturally? Preternaturally, yes, yes, yes. I love that word, I like it much better than pissed, which you used earlier. But in my day, we call it peeved. Oh, no, I like pissed. I think pissed is a good word. All right, we’ve added salt, pepper, parsley, lemon into this butter. Pissed is something I often clean. Yeah, okay that makes sense. Technically, what you do behind the closed doors of an airplane bathroom. Curtain. It was just a curtain in the bathroom? No, there’s a curtain that I sit behind. Oh, you have to sit behind a curtain? And then I wait for a man to tell me to come out. Wait, ts that actually how it worked? Yeah, this is me behind the curtain. Tight squeeze. Looking like a hot dog. Well, a very thin hot dog. A very thin, no a very thin hot dog, you’re right. How’s all that Valium treating you? Oh, I love it. I also love Coca-Cola. Yes. Coca-Cola’s fun. It kind of makes the, it balances out the Valium, and it just gives me a nice, like, you know, this. Yeah, you’re just floating evenly but numb to the world. Yes. Numb to the turbulence. Nothing bothers me much, especially the not being married part. Yeah, well, I mean, are you putting in the work? You’re on the apps? Apps? Actually no, I will never go on the apps ever again. Have you? Wait, oh, okay, but you have been on the apps? I was at one point, but most of the time people just don’t show up. Wait, really? The only times I ever used Tinder, the people did not show up twice. Oh. And then I was like, this is dumb. You deserve better. Not doing this anymore. So yeah, not doing that no more. And then the other time, I dated this guy who had turned out to be an undercover investigator, a private eye and. Private investigating you? No, no, no. No, he just turned out to be that. So sometimes we’d be driving in his car, and we’d stop for a while and I’d be like, “Why are we stopping?” And he’s like, “uh, no reason.” And I’d be like, “nah, I can’t be a part of this.” Wait, he took you on his undercover PI? Once. What was he trying to find? That’s like, dangerous stuff He couldn’t tell me. He wasn’t allowed to tell me. Couldn’t or Wouldn’t? All I will say is that his dresser, just covered in pill bottles. You found a hard boiled 1950s noir PI? This was in New York, this is not in LA. Oh, like that explains everything. Oh, this was in New York, that’s like 90% of the guys. You’re either in finance, or you’re a hard boiled PI smoking a tobacco pipe, addicted to pills. He was very good looking. Oh, sounds hot. All right, so we’re gonna let the steak cook, we’re gonna get this butter in the fridge, and then we’re gonna figure it out. Stewardess, steaks are done and my amphetamines just kicked in. Ooh, that’s my favorite time of day. If people don’t know about the casual drug references, they were just prescribing, just, just, what are they called? What are the things that “Wolf of Wall Street” dude took all the time? Diet pills. Diet pills? No, no, no. Quaaludes! They were just prescribing quaaludes and amphetamines like it was candy. They wouldn’t give me those, it’s just the diet pills for me. They do weigh us. Oh wait, no, no. They actually weigh you? Oh, yes. I think that they said that we have to weigh a certain thing so that we don’t make the plane crash. I don’t think that’s true. Apparently my ass was too big at one point and I was gonna make the whole plane crash. Did they put you on one of those, like, fat burning things where you just like sit in the machine and it goes brrr. No, I will tell you our exercise plan actually. It also has to do with balance. It’s not all about my big fat ass. We had to do with the conga, and that helped with balance as well. No you didn’t, no, no, no. That’s a thing? Yes, yes they did. Seriously though, it’s in a video. Workout science back then wasn’t what it is today. Also, we got on these little balance things, it’s like a wooden round board, and then they had a ball under it. And then you kind of balanced on it. And then we did jousting. The hell Are you talking about? Yes, it was a stick. You did jousting? Yes, it was like a stick with two cushy things on the end and then we’d hit each other with it. Are you sure that wasn’t just for the entertainment of the executives? I think it was more of a competitive thing, I don’t think that some of the ladies wanted me there. Okay, that makes sense. They were just hazing you and beating the crap outta you. All right, so we got our beautiful broiled filet minjon, with the beurre maitre d’hotel right here. This is like French simplicity and excellence at the time defined. We got it on a little tiny plate, ’cause they served everything in these giant trays that had 19 different dishes on them. So, first course up Emily, you ready to- you ready to pleasure our guests with another food? You know, I don’t appreciate that. That’s a problem for me. There’s a lot of men on these planes that think that I’m here for that, and I am not. I feel like I should apologize for men. That would be very nice. I’ve never heard an apology from a man in my life. Lots of women though. I just wanna say, I know you dealt with a lot of hardships, and on behalf of all men, I mean it’s not, and it’s, it’s times, but the times that doesn’t make any, I mean in Mad Men I think, a lot. What I’m saying is, let’s make some lobster, okay? So we’re, so right now we’re back. You know, that’s close enough to an apology. It’s the closest you’ve ever gotten? It’s the closest I’ve ever gotten, a lot of stumbling and it feels like you tried very hard. Can’t get over that edge, you know, it a mental block. All right, so right now we’re making homard de l’Americain. Woo! Look at that full bar! Lobster all American. This full bar is literally just for one French dish. Like I said, French cooking at the time was considered like the height of luxury, the height of complication. And also this is in the thick of what’s called “The French Brigade System” in the kitchens. Where if I said anything, if I said, “drop that lobster chef.” You would yell back, “Oui chef!” And you’d do that, or else you’d just get beaten with a sack of potatoes. Really brutal, again, workplace protections back then, they weren’t what they are today. What if you’re into that? If you’re into that, then woohoo it’s a party baby! I’ve heard of some very interesting things that men are into into when they’re on the flight and they’re a little schnockered. Do say. I’m gonna start browning out some lobster, you tell ’em about the schnockered kinky men. They usually just tell me how they’re unhappy in their marriage. Oh, yeah. It wasn’t an issue back then, ’cause they just did whatever, right? Yes, apparently so. Power is kinda. Not with me, but I should tell you that I’m, makes me very grateful to not be married at this point. And let me tell you why I’m very grateful to not be married. Please. I’ll tell you a couple more dating stories. You wanna hear another one? I would love to hear another one. How about the time a guy got so drunk he peed in my bed? But I had a bed bug cover on the mattress, ’cause it’s New York, so just kind of pooled in the middle. He was. Did he get a second date? Yeah. Yes! Oh my god, there’s smoking. Is the engine? No, no, no, it’s not the engine it’s just lobster. Sorry, I had a flashback. Lobster American is a very cool dish that. What? The war? Oh no, the planes of, the planes. How many plane crashes have you been in? Oh. Don’t, no, you don’t have to say, it sounds traumatic. Four and a half. You’ve dealt with enough in your life. Well, I’m gonna have to deal with a lot more. The bed pissing, the drunk passengers. Yes, there’s that. But then, oh my goodness, planes are very loud. Yes. Because it’s like we got the turbine, we got the little fling, these things on the front. I should know what that is, I went to flight attendant school. But I don’t know. Okay, so lobster American. So this dish was created in France in 1860s by a chef named Pierre Fraisse. Pierre Fraisse, let’s try and get that high school French in there. It was called lobster American. You went to high school? I sure did. Oh, that’s fun. Yeah, the war wasn’t going on when I was there. And so we could just. I just played in the women’s baseball team. I’ve seen that movie. Yes. So we’re going onion, tomato, carrot, celery, garlic. Lot of aromatics, a little bit of saffron in there because again, this was very luxurious. That is a very teeny tiny bit of saffron. Yeah, a little bit of saffron, but smell that dude, that’s the saffron you’re smelling. That very strong. Ooh, oh yeah, you’re right. It’s kind of this very like burnish sort of aroma in there. And then some tomato paste, trying to get that caramelized. I think this just activated the whole chunks of salt that you’ve got in my eyeball. I’m sorry about that. You know what that reminds me? We had a glass divider between the coach and the first class. And sometimes there’d be so much turbulence, it would just shatter. And then there’d be glass just everywhere. So I probably have a shard just stuck, probably up in there somewhere. It’s my little souvenir. So now we have our full bar here, we got our aromatics going. Oh my goodness, this is beautiful. We got dry Sherry, we got VSOP cognac, that’s very special old pale. You look at that? That’s my last name. Blandy? Blandy. I’m Betty Blandy. You didn’t even ask my name. I didn’t think you were allowed to give the name. It’s okay, ’cause you almost apologized for all men. Can you open all these bottles? Oh, yes. I imagine you probably drank on planes, right? You got a little snockered just to deal with it. Just a little bit, I’d have a little bit of sherry. Little bit of sherry. But that was only when the men would offer it to me, I could not get any on my own. They weren’t allowed to tip, but they could get me a little drink. Oh my God, is that a rotary telephone on the ground? Oh dear, what’s that doing down there? How did we get a whole rotary telephone? It’s not supposed to be there. I’m going to bend at the knees. Oh God, drinking dry Sherry, I mean, dialing a rotary telephone’s not great by itself. All my buttons are like, screaming for dear life. It’s a squeeze, it’s about to impale me. Ugh, ugh. Hello. Hello. All right, so we’re cooking off the alcohol in here. We got all this, French sauces had 90 different ingredients in it. They were probably making this at Maxim’s in Paris, which has been around since the 1800s, and like is still there. But of course they like Maxim’s in Dubai and Miami, and it’s become one of those sort of legacy brands, and apparently the food’s like not good these days. So this was probably made in the restaurant. Both great places to find a husband. Yeah, you should go. Do you get to travel a lot? Well, yes. Well I, I mean like for pleasure. Like did you get to get off the plane? But like, do you get to get off the plane and live a little or do they just like keep you in a cell? My job is my pleasure. This is my pleasure, my own job. Oh yeah, that’s something who someone who hates their job says. You know what’s not pleasurable? What’s that? A story I’m gonna tell you about when I dated in New York City. Real quick, I’m gonna add, hold up just one second. Okay. I’m gonna add lobster stock, and some veal stock in there. We’re gonna add our lobster back in, we’re gonna let this simmer for about five minutes. Ooh, it smells really good. Emily’s gonna tell you something absolutely horrifying that she’s normalized in her own mind and told her therapist. It’s about a man named David Hot David, at least that’s what his name is in my phone. He was very handsome, he was an insurance salesman. It’s not David Do Not Call? No, it’s David Hot David. I’ll show you a photo, you’ll see. David Hot David was a customer of mine at a men’s clothing store. He took me on dates where there were multiple women at the table and just him, and I just assumed that he had a lot of lady friendships. But I out-drank all of them, as I usually do. But they would all leave one at a time, because they would, like, the place would be closing down and I would still be drinking. And so they’d all disappear and then I would be like, all right, I guess I was right. I was the date the whole time. Nuh-uh, I was not. You entered in like a gladiatorial combat. Yeah, pretty much. I’m always gonna win that y’all. But also the other thing was, he invited me, eventually we were dating a lot. We also went to a rave one time and he abandoned me. I was dressed as Ace Ventura and he was, and he was dressed as like a, a Native American Chieftain, and he was not Native American. And I was dressed as Ace Ventura. It’s like AI bot wrote your dating history. But so he abandoned me, and did something illegal I’m pretty sure, ’cause when he came back his pupils were like huge. And so I guess I wasn’t sexy enough dressed as Ace Ventura, probably not. And then he invited, I thought maybe he really liked me though, so he invited me to this party he was having at his fancy apartment. And so I was gonna get to meet all of his friends, I was like, “Oh my God, it’s happening.” I got there, and then he guided me to this large closet area with another woman, and he asked me to work the coat check. Oh. So we’re gonna let this simmer for about four or five. And on behalf of my, I just wanna say that we, we don’t do these things. I laughed. It’s, it’s more that, and it’s on us to do the work. Right. And that I, I’m, I’m gonna let this lobster simmer for another five minutes, and then we’re gonna pull it, we’re gonna strain it, we’re gonna mount it with butter. It’s never gonna happen, is it? All right, we got the lobster coming out to a simmer. And even though I can’t bring myself to say the words, there’s a very fancy company called Edible Arrangements, and I promise I will send you one. Oh! Eventually. Well, hold on, can you just order you one? I can order anything, I’ve been trained to talk on the phone, and say “excuse me, may I have one of your goods?” And they usually say yes, as long as I have money. So we’ve infused. Oh no! Did you get hot lobster stock in your eye? I feel like that was another occupational hazard. Yes, I relate to lobsters very much. Why is that? We’re both not supposed to be in the air. Yeah, that makes sense. Can you chop those herbs real quick? You can talk about your philosophical implications of lobsterhood, like no one’s ever done that before David Foster Wallace. Shout out! Gourmet magazine, “Consider the Lobster,” greatest piece ever written. So I’m gonna strain this off. Also a great movie. Oh yeah, you know I never saw it. Love that movie. All right, so we’re gonna add the hot stock back in there. You’ve infused all the aromatics. You can strain this, or you couldn’t. I’m gonna shut down the heat, and then we’re gonna mount it with a fork ton of butter. Am I chopping this right? Yeah, chop it just hard, chop it hard. And, screw it, dump in all the butter. It’s gotta whisk fast and hard. Gotta go fast. This is the part of the episode- Oh no! We’re going down! Sir, that apron is very, very fetching. Oh my God, thank you so much. Again, I’m not interested, but if you’re interested in buying this apron, head to mythical.com. It’s called the Pizzacock Apron, just dropped in the store. Don’t check when it actually dropped in the store, it’s brand new grand opening sale. Don’t check if it’s on sale either. But we’re really proud of the design, I think it freaking rules. If you already got the first apron, what better to add to your collection than a second apron in a different color? PizzaCock. Oh, pizzacock. In where we’re from, we say pizza penis. We got this lovely sauce right here, hold on, hold on, hold on. Or pizza johnson. Is this chopped enough? No, but I’m happy that you did it. All right, we’re gonna nestle our lobster in that sauce, right. Fudge! God dang it. So we’re gonna take some of these fresh herbs. Okay. And we’re just gonna sprinkle these around our lobster American right here. Lovely, this this fresh tarragon. Very, very French. Oh, very fancy. That’s great, the sauce will thicken up as this sets and finally gets to the table. And beautiful, boom, Lobster American. Done. All on tiny little dishes. Hope I don’t scald anyone. Because if we get turbulence, I’m not five eight, I don’t have good balance. Look at all the yellow and orange. This is a very French dish. So these are called Duchess potatoes, or pommes la Duchesse, and it’s incredibly French. 1746 this was created, 1906 Auguste Escoffier in Le Guide Culinaire publishes a recipe for this, 1943 US Bureau of Home Economics, to use up all the excess potatoes they grew for the Depression in World War II. They published a potato cookbook that taught American housewives to make this dish. So 1951, right now, we’re up in the air on a Boeing Strata Cruiser Pan Am, right? They’re making duchess potatoes. This is very American, very French at the same time. Very cool dish. You ready to make it? Yes. All right, so we got these potatoes right here. They’ve been riced and pureed. We’re gonna add some melted butter to it. We’re gonna add a little bit of cream. This is like one of those dishes that you. That is very thick. Yeah, it is thick boy cream. And then we’re gonna add two egg yolks. Little bit of salt. Can you grade in some nutmeg for me? Oh, is that what this is? Yeah, I was like, it’s the only one that you don’t know what it is. I love that you got, you got a bowl for one nut. Was there a lot of time figuring out which little bowl to put it in? Kinda, yeah. Aw that’s cute. Okay, I’ve never grated a nut. Well, it’s not a nut. This is also a hallucinogenic. Oh, I heard about that, nutmeg? Yeah, dude, that’s a thing. Yeah, don’t have too much nutmeg. I’ve heard a story about somebody who thought That’s good, that’s good, that’s good. who thought that it was cinnamon. Oh my God, what if I had put too much in? Ugh, we’re gonna start throwing up on the flight. We’re gonna get strapped Just drug all the passengers Strapped to the freaking seat. We’re gonna be a viral Twitter meme. Yeah, I’m gonna start hallucinating and you’re have to strap me to a chair, and then we’re gonna go viral on Twitter. Well, speaking of nausea, this looks a lot like our little sick bags, which everybody had to use because there was so much turbulence. So there was a lot of. Just a lot of vomit everywhere. A lot of vomit, a lot of liquor, a lot of turbulence. We don’t call it vomit where we come from. What do you call it? We call it “a little bit of sick.” Just a little, just a little bit of sick. Just a little dab of sick What if I swallowed this whole thing? Do you ever have those, do you ever have those thoughts where you’re like, “I could do that.” Yeah, intrusive thoughts. Yeah, like when you’re church and you’re like, “I could go run up on that altar and just like twerk. Nobody’s gonna stop me.” You know? But I won’t swallow it. All right, so don’t tell that to the passengers. So if we were just gonna go ahead and, can you hold this steady real quick? I need to pipe this out. Yes. This is very, thank you so much. Just gonna. Do you get sick on air travel or on cars? No, I’m not a, no, I don’t. Were you about to say sissy? Yeah, a little bit. But I don’t believe in gendered insults. And again, I appol- I think that what men have done throughout history, you know, it’s, I mean, I voted. I didn’t care about the emails. Oh, there we go. I Voted. We got another possible apology. And I think, and I think we’re ready. Men are emotional, you know? I think that, and so I’m, so I’m sorta digging these potatoes. All right, so we’re gonna go ahead and pop this in the oven, get it a little browned up. And we’re gonna eat. The stewardess is here. It’s a lot of turbulence. Yeah, yeah. I’m comfortable. Oh, good. I’m a little, little nervous. No, you’re fine. Well, and you’re a veteran, you’re 28 years old. I should have done more exercises to be able to push this thing. Conga lines didn’t help? Oh no. Do you need, can I offer you any assistance? It seems like, don’t. Okay, okay. You’re, ma’am, you’re shaking. I’m not shaking, the plane’s shaking. No, I know, we’re all shaking. Here, just, just, okay, just settle here. Just put it down. I’m trying. I know, I know, I know. I have to concentrate. That was stressful. One down. We are currently on the tarmac, we’ve been landed for three hours and the food has not come yet. I feel like I’m One more. I’ll take a longer trip this way. Don’t spill the martini. I’m trying not to spill. I know, I know, I’m just saying You know, you just gotta calm your nerves. The Valium should be helping. Why do they make the cups like this? It’s a martini, and we’re on an airplane. We gotta get snockered. I did it! That wasn’t so hard. No, not at all. Well, you ready to dig into our first class presidential meal on the Boeing Strata Cruiser On Pan Am Airlines? I’ve never gotten to eat one of these. I’m excited for you to try. Let’s dig into that steak, this looks gorgeous. No, ma’am, no, no, no. I don’t think, okay, okay. She’s, Yeah, it’s actually just water. It’s just water. I think that’s just. Oh no, it’s just olive juice. Oh, that is just olive juice, okay. Let’s just, okay, let’s, no, don’t drink anymore. Oh, you, you really drank all the olive juice. Please tell me that olive brine is like good for digestion or something. Yeah, it’ll all UTIs. Someone Google it, Mindy. So as you see, we got the full freaking shebang here. We got the nuts, the cheeses, the fruit. We got a tart, they would serve bread rolls. And then of course, the salad course, the Duchess potatoes, the filet, and the lobster. Should we dig into the lobster first? Okay, yeah, yeah, yeah. Let’s go lobsty first. Ooh, do you use a fork? Yeah, I’m gonna try and dig. This is that homard de l’American, from Maxim’s in Paris, they partnered Pan Am, they had French chefs on board. How do you eat these like a lady? I don’t think the ladies were allowed in business class. We weren’t allowed in business class? But I mean, ladies ate lobster. That was like, you know. Dude. Oh, oh, I think I got the big chunk. Dip that, that is so good. I know we have more things to eat. You’re never gonna get a husband acting like this. Do you dare me? I dare you, I double dog dare you. Okay, all right, here we go. Cheers. How good is that? How good is that? Holy moly. They don’t even give you peanuts anymore. All the soft kids with the allergies. No napkins y’all? That was so amazing. All right. Oh, I need the fork. Yeah, really. That steak is cooked perfectly, all of that butter. Oh wow. Right On there. I wanna get a lot of this butter going. Remind me everything that was in the butter. Oh, lemon zest, lemon juice, parsley, black pepper, salt. I want you guys to know something. I remember, like, things that are step by step, but like how it all goes together is never really my forte. So. I mean Forgive me. I’ve never had anything remotely good on an airplane, and now I’m mad about it. Yeah! This used to be incredible. They just go microwave you a Salisbury steak now. They’ll have like, the Emeril Lagasse branded microwave meatloaf, you know, if you really wanna upgrade. I just heard this from Trevor. Apparently the air pressure and things makes food taste bad in the air. I’m having a great time. I know, ’cause in this episode, we are technically in the air. Is that what we’re saying? That’s the idea. Because in the Titanic we were on the ship, and now we are officially in the air. Whoa, we’re in the air! Is that the same reason people get horny on airplanes? The reason they cry at movies? And also you cry on the airplane a lot. I cry all the time. I cried watching a show Friday Night Tikes on an airplane. It’s about youth football in Texas, and I was like, “the kids didn’t deserve that, they trying to be kids, man.” I’m doing the sauce now. Yeah, that’s the way to go. Oh my God, Josh. Take a potato, wet the potato in the sauce. Look at these duchess potatoes. My God, they come out like a little cookie. Look at, that’s cute! Hot damn. It’s like a little lemon meringue tart or something. Yeah, even that’s awesome. Damn. You put in there. Oh my God. I crap on classical French cooking a lot, for like no reason, ’cause this is delightful. No you don’t. No, I typically, I’m one of those people, like, I never seek it out. I’m always like, “this is overstated.” How many episodes have we done, that we’ve heard the words classical French cooking? Yeah, because it’s all history, and that’s all people cared about, which is why I hate it. But, that said, like the lobster American, incredible. Duchess potatoes, incredible. Broiled filet with butter on it. Oh my gosh. This is the hight, this, I mean, this is Mad Men era. Chase this down with a strong martini or six, and a couple unfiltered cigarettes, and like a lady’s magazine where she’s showing her ankle. And that just gets you harder than a diamond in an ice storm. I mean, this dress, because I’m not five eight, I’m showing a lot more than ankle. Heyo. And guess what? I didn’t shave my legs for this today. I thought about it. Our hair’s interlocked like Velcro. They don’t care. I would like to officially apologize. For the fact that throughout history, there’s been, you know, notable unequal treatment of air passengers. Because Spirit Airlines, you suck so badly. Bring back Pan American, bring back the opulence. But no, I’m sorry, women didn’t deserve that. Ah, I have one more story for you. Oh God, I can’t wait, I’m gonna eat this tart. What is it? One time I was dating a guy and he, we were drinking and I forget that sometimes I can drink more than other people, and he fainted in my arms. And that’s true gender equality folks. I had to like cup his head like this and lower him to the floor. Like I was a prince in a Disney movie. I dated him for two and a half years. Thanks so much for stopping by the Mythical Kitchen. We got new episodes for you every week. Emily’s got new dating traumas every Wednesday, wherever you get your dating traumas. New ones on the way. Hit us up on Instagram and TikTok at Mythical Kitchen with pictures of your mythical dishes under hashtag dreams become food. We’ll see y’all next time. Did we wanna do the thing with the turbulence where I die from a knife? Yeah, yeah, do it, do it, do it. Oh, turbulence. Oh no, the knife! The knives, they’re everywhere! Oh God! Oh no. My airline titty. You’re too hot to handle and so is your bake ware. Get a mythical kitchen oven mitt, available now at mythical.com.