My name is Kris Collins and you can call me Kris. And my last meal would be donuts with coffee, scrambled eggs and bacon, crepes topped with whipped cream, cheese perogies, thin crust pepperoni pizza with barbecue sauce, baked mac and cheese, crispy fries and chocolate shake, and finally, chocolate ice cream cake, chocolate lava cake with mint chip ice cream, and angel food cake with whipped cream and strawberries. Everybody has exactly two things in common: we all eat, and we’re all gonna die. Kris Collins, welcome to the show. Thank you for having me. I’m so, I’m so excited. To eat food today? Yes. Or to die? Both. Life, it’s so tiring. It’s a lot. You know what I mean? It’s a lot, and it’s short, and it’s good to eat good food because it is so short. Couldn’t agree more. So, have you thought about your last meal before? Yeah, like all the time. No way? Because I think about dying all the time. Ah. We’re gonna have the best time. All the time. Yeah, it’s bad. I actually just made a video today, about having intrusive thoughts, like that kinda thing, and I feel like that goes hand-in-hand with dying, because a lot of them have to do with dying. If you’re on a bridge, you wanna turn left a little bit. Mhm. Off the bridge. Sometimes I’m scared to be around knives, which is a weird thing to say as a chef. Yeah, yeah. That’s scary for you. But I feel like, no, no, I feel like if there’s food in front of me, if it’s intentional, I actually posted something on Instagram where I said, it was a workout video and I said, “If I stop moving, the intrusive thoughts get in.” Yes. And so as long as I’m cooking and chopping an onion, then nothing bad’s gonna happen tonight. You get distracted. I get that. Yeah, if I’m sitting alone in a room, bad thoughts come. Yeah, yeah, that’s why there’s food, there’s making videos, there’s, yeah. Yes. But then I think about if that happens, or if that, then, the last thing I wanna be thinking when I’m like going off a bridge is like, I should’ve ordered the fries instead of the side salad. You know? Well, we got a lot of food coming today. You ready to get to it? Yes. All right, Kris. First course, we got coffee and donuts. Do you mind if I pour you up? Please, please do. This is the fanciest coffee I’ve ever seen in my life. It’s so funny. We legit bought this just for the show. I use like a $20 Mr. Coffee at home, and just drink black coffee. Yeah, I use my Walmart Keurig. Yeah. And I’m happy with that. And then we have donuts. This is from a local donut shop. We could’ve made them ourselves, but they would’ve just been worse. So we figured if you wanted donuts, we’re gonna give you donuts, Kris. Oh! Yeah, that’s. Is that a fritter? Is that an apple fritter? We got apple fritters, we got sour cream glazed. Yeah. Which, the old fashion, those are some of my favorite, and then we got the custard filled, Boston cream classic glaze. Do you want some Splenda to go with your donuts? Yeah, I do. Yeah, same. I love Splenda! Splenda’s the best in my coffee. Grab a donut. What’s your donut of choice? Okay. Also, tell me. So. About why coffee and donuts? Yeah, yeah, yeah. So, I mean, I’m from Canada. Heard of it. And we have Tim Horton’s, and Tim Horton’s has freshly baked donuts, and my go-to donut was always the Boston cream. I’m gonna grab an apple fritter. This looks delightful. I know. Also, our ADHDs are literally- I know. I know. Going to turn into a tornado. Nah, people are gonna be watching. Like when a warm front and a cold front. What is going on? I think it’s what they come here for. That is thick! This is heavy bud. Are you a dipper? I’m gonna do it without the dip to get the flavor first. Fair. And then I’m gonna do that. Oh, I’m excited. Mm. Why is it so dark? Sometimes, you don’t question things in life, Kris. I’m asking you because you cook stuff. Oh, they fried it too long. Oh! That’s why it tastes so oily, because so much of it soaked in, but that’s how I like it. All right, so, I want to talk about the idea of like capital F fame. Mm. Because you, just a couple years ago, you were hair dressing before COVID happened. I know you’ve explained this story a million times. Fast forward two years, 47 million followers on TikTok. Yeah. If you wanted to raise an army to defeat Genghis Khan at his prime, you could. I could! Is that wild to you? I’ve never thought of it like that but that’s terrifying. I’m an idiot. No. Terri- terrifying for him. Your followers would just run over as a hoard of mongo largers. I know. I shouldn’t be telling anybody what to do though ’cause I am a grade A moron. But, yeah, it’s wild. Like it happened so fast. Mm. And I don’t think it has processed completely. Yeah. It hasn’t. I’ve just, like I said, when I arrived here, like, I don’t even know how I got here. Mhm. Like everyday I wake up, and I’m like, what is going on? Yeah. Do you consider yourself capital F famous? Like, are you, do you feel comfortable using that word? No. No, not at all. Yeah, why not though? Like if you just looked strictly at the numbers. Yeah. 47 million people. I mean, that’s the size, it’s bigger than most nations out there. I’ve met some, like, celebrities now. Mm. Or like capital F famous people, and I’ve been more star-struck by like the YouTubers I’ve met. Interesting. Because that’s who I grew up watching. So, it’s funny to meet people that follow me, that kind of feel the same way or even told me that. They’re like, I got more excited about meeting you than this like ex-celebrity or whatever. And I’m like why? I mean I have a general theory why. I mean we’ve kind of been doing the YouTube thing for a while. Especially you. You’ve made yourself so vulnerable to people, right? You’ve talked about mental illness. You’ve talked about struggles with dis-disordered eating. Yeah. There’s a level of you giving yourself to people and them giving themselves even more to you. Yeah. Do you feel that? Yeah, I, 100. I think that’s the thing. I think it’s the almost parasocial. Yeah. Relationship that you share. I just, I like to be completely transparent, ’cause it is not all rainbows and sunshine. Do you feel like pressured to share that much? Like do you think there, especially if somebody is say like, hey when you said this, it really helped me. Mhm. ‘Cause there’s people that if their views are down, there’s a crying thumbnail. 100%. Every three months. But then, there’s the very real side of this. Where somebody’s telling you, like hey, this helped me. This drug me out of a dark place. Yeah. And then you’re like, do I have an obligation to do that now? Yeah, yeah. I only do it if I’m in a place where I feel comfortable in doing it. Mhm. But if I don’t feel like there’s a need to share anything, I’m not gonna share it. I don’t. It’s easy to say, oh I don’t care about the views. But I mean. Mm. I try not to care about that stuff. Because then it becomes less organic. And I start to enjoy it less. Can you teach me how to think that way? Yeah. Like, honestly. Can you? It’s. I mean, and that’s easy to say. Coming from, like yes. I’ve gotten to this place really fast. So maybe that’s easy to say. Even as a kid. I always wanted like anonymity. It was like, ah, I’d love to be in movies and do all this stuff, but I wouldn’t wanna be like famous. I wouldn’t want people to take my picture, know where I live or anything like that. So I think it might come from a little bit of that. If I was to just disappear, I’d be okay with that. Yeah. I mean, like. A little bit. People should look for you, right? I mean, yeah. To see if it was a bear. ‘Cause I, you know? I don’t. That would be a good way to die. Oh. I mean not a good way, but like epic. What do you mean not a good way? That’s the best way to die. Ah, Kallmekris dies by wrestling a bear. That’s like the most Russian thing ever. I got some Russian in my blood, so. That would be epic. I can’t wait for the YouTube response videos to that one. Reacting to Kallmekris fights bear- Yeah. Right? Get it on video. Almost wins? Question mark. Yeah. All right, Kris. Well, we have here today. We have soft scrambled eggs, crispy bacon, crepes filled with Nutella, banana, strawberry, and topped with whipped cream. Is this a classic Canadian breakfast? I was just guessing- You know what? With the crepes. Yeah. Pretty classic. This is like a Sunday breakfast. Weekend in Canada. Yes. It’s 4 degrees, which I don’t know what that means in American at all. A pretty cold. Okay. I feel like that’s like 40 maybe 2 Fahrenheit, maybe? Check. Google check that. I feel like multiply by three and add 32? I don’t know how to do that. I don’t know. I don’t know. I don’t know either. I’m dumb. Zero is zero degrees in Celsius, and that’s what in 37 in Fahrenheit? 32. There’s a two. It ends in a two. We’re going to be here for a while. Anyway. I’m cold in Canada on a Sunday. Okay? We’ve gathered round the table. My father would make this breakfast, but it would all be burnt. Legit, burnt? The first attempt at the bacon yesterday- Oh did you? We were like should we redo it or just run with it? Oh I kinda like, I love like a little bit over cooked bacon. Can someone get us a blowtorch? Yeah. Yes, fire. Just torch that. All right, Kris, please, dig in. Okay, I’m excited. Oh my God, oh my God. Kristopher. Oh! Okay, okay thank you. I forgot the most important part. I thought you were calling me Kristopher. Oh, I was. I was like. Is that not your full name? Thank you for going out of your way to get this gorgeous liquid. Wow. We support Canadian products. And you know what Canadians do? No, you don’t. Yeah. I gotta. Got that. You gotta do it. When in British Columbia. Also, I’m sorry. I talk in a different accent sometimes. Yeah. Do you do that like as a defense mechanism? Or like what’s going on there, Kris? Come on. Okay. First of all, is this a therapy session? Am I paying you? For me too. I think if we just each- Yeah. Let’s earn it. give each other $180 and pretend to run our insurance cards? Yeah, yeah. Trauma dump, let’s go. Yeah, we can do it. Yeah, you know what? As a kid, I did it all the time. I loved listening to people’s accents, and I thought they sounded so much cooler than me. There’s no, I, you know what? Eating around a camera is terr- Oh, take it at your own pace. Do whatever you want. Nah, I’m just gonna shove it in my mouth. Please. Yeah, yeah. You guys are gonna have to be okay with that. There was, can I throw shade on Hot Ones real quick? Mm. Mhm. So there’s a study came out that Hot Ones guests are primarily male because a lot of women, and especially their publicists, were like, well we don’t want them eating something especially something that could be considered phallic on camera. Oh. So there’s not an opportunity for them. Ah, interesting. And then, that became a sort of point of contingence. So, I think you should fully, I think you should like shove it all. Yeah, I think so too. Yeah. We’re makin’ waves here. So I’ve noticed a lot of the foods, a lot of the foods that we got going on today, they’re like comfort foods. Right? Mhm. You’ve talked about disordered eating and stuff. Yes. I was an athlete in college. And you actually said something that I’ve never heard anybody express outside of my own head before. Mm. Which is that when you were talking about like clean eating and exercising like crazy, that you call it like a form of self harm. Yeah. 100%. Which, can you explain that? ‘Cause I felt that for a while myself. Mhm. Yeah, yeah. And it’s something like everyday. It’s something that, it’s always in your head. Like I was very deep into anorexia. And, the exercise. What do they call it? Exorcisms. Not exorcisms. The the- I was really into exorcisms at one point of my life. No. Just over exercising. Mm. And anorexia and me not eating enough. Yadda yadda yadda. I never felt like I was physically harming myself until it got really bad where I had to be in the hospital and stuff and they were like. She explained to me. She’s like, oh this is your way of hurting yourself. Yeah. And I was like, oh yeah it kinda is. Because you’re essentially punishing yourself. Like, if I eat this meal, okay. Now I gotta go run however x amount of miles to burn this off. Yeah. It’s like, am I gonna die tomorrow? Like? Like thinking about the salad or whatever I was eating. The other rockin’ abs in the casket. Yeah. Oh my God. You’ll look great in the photos. Right? Exactly. The Instagram? Nobody cares about you as much as you care about yourself. Kris, I have ketchup if you would like ketchup. I love it. Just a half empty bottle. Ah, but it’s American ketchup, but that’s okay. Ah. What’s Canadian ketchup? Ours is sweeter. Wait, wait. I think I know why. Why? I think it’s a British Commonwealth thing. Oh, probably. So, do you call it ketchup or tomato sauce? You don’t, you don’t- Tomato sauce? have a British accent. You called it tomato sauce. Australians! Australians! Y’all compete in the Commonwealth games. No. Some people call it tom-tomato sauce. Some people call it ketchup. I just say ketchup. That makes sense. But like we have words that you guys don’t say. Like we say Chesterfield, and like. What is? What? What is in Chesterfield? What is? Chesterfield is, a cigar that only a very old man smokes. What, like that? Ah, no. It’s a couch. What? Yeah, right? I dunno, it’s weird. You kook. You kooky` canucks over there. You kook. That’s not a slur, is it? No. Ah, thank God. All right, Kris. We have a thin crust pepperoni pizza with a drizzle of barbecue sauce on it. We have a side of ranch dressing right here. Yup. And then we have a personal favorite of mine, perogies with potato and cheese, topped with sour cream, chives, raspberry jelly, and bacon bits. Oh, it looks so good. It’s- Mhm. It’s like premium to what I eat at home. Talk to me about the perogies ’cause this is- Okay. Something I also grew up with. Okay, yeah. So my, I have, I come from a, German Russian Ukrainian background. So like my grandma would always make cheese perogies. And then, for some reason, my mom liked it with raspberry jam, which I used to think was really weird. But then I tried it with it. And it’s really good. And with the sour cream, bacon bits, chives. It’s delicious. I hope I don’t screw up your grandma’s recipe. Please. No. Can I, can I? Can I dish you some- Please. Perogi? Please. Thank you. So I grew up eating these because my family is from, eastern Pennsylvania. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, and they’re just like really huge there. Yeah. And so I, same thing, but I would eat them with ketchup being a very American thing. Oh. Yeah, I knew. When I was younger, I would do that. Ketchup on everything. Rice? Same. I put ketchup on rice. No, it’s very Filipino of you. That is a big. I am Filipino. Wait, Mindy, can you verify? Is that a? Is it? Mindy, you don’t speak for all Filipino people. Yeah. I just mean, like, we just talk about Filipino food a lot. Outraged Filipino people in the comments. What happens after you die? Excuse me while I chew on this perogie. Oh, you got it. Contemplate my death. That’s a great question. And it’s a question I think about all the time. Yeah. And I love like horror movies and all those kind of things. And people die in them all the time. And sometimes there’s a heaven, sometimes there’s a hell, sometimes there’s a weird in between. I would love if I could just be a ghost and I could haunt people. I think that’d be really fun. Yeah. I think that’d I be a fun ghost. I mean, I grew up in a Christian household. So, my parents believed in heaven and hell. And if you’re good, you go up. If you’re bad, you go down. Yeah. And, yeah. I don’t know. I respect that. And I think. That’s. It sound like you super believe in it, too. I don’t know? I don’t know. I’m just, I was one of those kids that got kicked out of Sunday school ’cause I asked too many questions. Yup. So, yeah. I’m at a constant state of I don’t know. If you had to- if you had to make a guess, like roulette table. You just gotta pick a number. Oh, okay. I feel like if I have to die, it’s just going to be nothing. Yeah. Which I kind of love. Like the whole, before you were born thing? Yeah, yeah. And maybe I become somebody else and I forget about this life, and all that kind of stuff. ‘Cause that’s kinda fun to look at those stories about kids that are like, I was in World War II. I shot a man. Also, eat, eat ya pizza. Okay, sorry. Pizza’s great. You gotta eat the pizza. This is great, too. Is there something comforting knowing that after you die, there still could be millions of people consuming your content online? Oh. I just thought about this the other day. Is that a form of immortality? Yeah, a little bit. Which is kind of creepy. Yeah. Does that suck or does that rule? I think they can look at me and hopefully they say like, she was nice. You know? She was funny. She made me feel a little uncomfortable. Like, yeah. That’s fine. Yeah, the whole range of human emotions. Nice, funny, and a little uncomfortable sometimes. Yeah, a little weird. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah. I think it’s good. Are there any comforting thoughts you have about death? Like is there any, just like, straight optimism for it? I know that, I’m trying to live my life to the most everyday, so that when I do die, maybe it’s tomorrow, maybe I get hit by a bus. Who knows? Stay tuned. For tomorrow’s episode. Yeah. This may be my last meal. I’ll be okay with that. If this pizza’s the last thing you consume, would that be okay? Yeah. You don’t think the crust was underdone? No. Not at all. And I like thin, I don’t like- thick pizza. Mhm. It’s just too much dough. Like, get right to the cheese. Right to the sauce. Right to the pepperoni, you know? Cheers to that. Yeah. All right, Kris. We have in front of you a chocolate milkshake. We actually made a chocolate malt, without you agreeing to that, but I love malts. It’s okay, I love that. And we have whipped cream, maraschino cherry, chocolate sprinkles, extra crispy French fries with ketchup, and then classic baked macaroni and cheese. Oh my God. Tell me, did, do these have any like special place in your heart, in your life? The mac and cheese, no, not really. I’ve never had baked mac and cheese before. You should. And I just wanna try it. You chose something you never had? I was like, they’ll make it for me. Well, I like mac and cheese. Like, I’m just like a- Sure. Trash. KD. Like. KD is Kraft dinner, which is something that we don’t say here. Oh. Not like it’s a slur. Just like we don’t, Kris we do not say that. What have I done? No, we we just call it Kraft mac and cheese. Oh. But Kraft is a very Canadian thing. Oh, okay. Yeah, so I had Kraft dinna. And, yeah I’ve always wanted to try this. But then this, is I, every time we went to, we go to Wendy’s after church on Sundays. And, we would get the, what is the, chocolate Frosty. Oh, a Frosty? With fries. And dip it in. Oh man. So I dipped the fries in here and knock. Eat it. But this is like fancy. I feel like I’m on a diner date. Do you split the bill? Or like, are you, do you ’cause I don’t have any money. I’ll pay for it baby. You got me? I got you. I give natural sugar baby energy, if I’m being honest. Yeah? Yeah, no I was horrible. You give natural sugar baby? Yeah. Yeah. Oh, I’m total sugar momma. Well, cheers. Cheers to that. I don’t wanna work anymore. I mean, I like this. Mhm. I just don’t wanna do it. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh my gosh, that’s so good. Have you learned anything about yourself during this? I have. I know that. This is our mid-meal debrief. Yeah, fair enough. I’m way more of a sweets person, actually. Like I would, I probably would’ve just said sweets. But I’m actually learning that, no I do like savory as well as this because it mixes both and I feel like I can eat more. You have a sweet stomach and a savory stomach. And never the twain shall meet. No, no. So, yeah, that’s what I’ve learned about myself. You talked about how you think about death all the time. All the time. Which, same. This is why. Yeah! You made a show out of it. But why does so many people say that they don’t? Do you think that they’re lying? No, I think they’re happy. Get. No, okay. Hold on, are they the same thing? To me, they’re the same thing. No one’s happy. Like, let’s, my sister, for example, my older sister. She’s the had-happiest ray of sunshine ever. And she just has no bad thoughts. I’m like, why do you think about death all the time? She doesn’t talk like this. I don’t know what I’m saying. But she’s like she’s that kind of person. Mhm. That never thinks about that stuff. So I think there are a lot of those people. If you could change yourself- Oh. to just be purely happy? Oh. Oh, yeah. Here’s a question. Oh. Would you do it? I think it’s good to have a little darkness. Yeah. And to have that because I don’t know. I feel like that’s what gives me my personality. I think I’m pretty great. I dunno. I feel like I waft between I don’t want to say the narcissism. That sounds? No. That’s a lot. Yeah. You’re not a narcissist. But I mean, like, wafting between- I’m also a doctor, I just. I have some weird moles. Yeah. But, yeah. I mean, I wafting between that self love and that like self hatred. Yes. I think it, I don’t know, evens out somewhere in between that gives you at least a more interesting life that can impact others. I think so, too. I think life would be very boring being very happy. Yeah. And maybe that’s just coming from two depressed people that, I’m not saying you’re depressed. Cheers. Just a guess. Oh, ju-just a guess? Wow. Where did ya get all that info from, Kris? Doctor. Yeah. Wow! This is the perfect temperature now. Oh, is it? Wow! It’s some pretty freakin’ good mac and cheese. That is the best. That’s a damn good mac and cheese. Wow. Do you feel, ’cause you’ve talked about social media as, you almost refer to it in a form of like salvation. Mm. Where you talk about, like, if you’re in a really dark place, you have people sending you messages of support. They’ll share their own stories. Yup. And you’ve always said that making people happy makes you happy. Yeah. If it were all to go away, and you lose that, does that put you in a worse place than where you started? I don’t think I’m worse off in this job, but I don’t think I’m better off in this job mentally. I think it’s just different. I came out of, what’s it called? I can’t think of the word. Costco. No, not Costco. What’s the, inpatient. Okay. When I came out of inpatient. Similar to Costco. Similar. When I came out of inpatient care, one of the things that my therapist wanted me to do was to make videos. Like my brother convinced me to start making TikToks. Whoa. Doing that, ’cause that’s something I used to do as a kid all the time. And it made me really happy. Mm. And writing jokes, and doing the stuff that makes me happy. And then it just so happened that people related to it. And it started to take off. And I’m like, I don’t know if this is healthy, but I’ll keep doing this. So, yeah, I think if it was to all go away, I would still, maybe continue to, I don’t know, entertain in a different way. Maybe? Or like write a book. Or, I don’t know. Do my own, I don’t know. I’d figure out something else to do. This situation around you is always gonna change, but no matter what, you’re still. I’m still battling whatever I have in in myself. And I can figure out how to navigate that in whatever scenario I’m in, I think. Bold move by a therapist to say- Hey. Hey, you should be more mentally stable. What if you hopped on social media? Right? I know. Well, the, well my my intention wasn’t to get. Yeah, of course. Internet famous. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It was just to like let off steam, basically. Like, she, I have journals full of random scripts that before I even started to do this. Like, I’m like a certified like psycho. Yeah yeah. If you like looked at me before making videos. I have like post-it notes of like dark jokes and all this stuff. Mhm. All around me. Solving a couple cold cases. Videos not posting. Yeah. 100%. So now that it’s on the internet, everybody’s like, oh yay. And I’m like, yeah, for sure. This is always healthy and good. So yeah. I think, yeah, that’s my spiel. It’s a good story. Yeah. Thanks. Is it true? It’s, yeah. It is true. I thought she was doing a bit. We’re doing a bit? No. All right, Kris. We have entered the final stage of the meal. We have dessert. This is extremely your S H I double hockey sticks as you said. We have a classic DQ ice cream cake right here. We have angel food cake with macerated strawberries, whipped cream. And then a chocolate lava cake with mint chip ice cream, a little bit of York Peppermint Patty action right there. Yup, love it. And some powdered sugar. I, this is heaven. This is heaven. I think there is a heaven. Now. Oh, we did it! We made a believer. I’m gonna ascend to heaven after I eat this. We are affiliated with the Church of Scientology and so the heaven you’re thinking of is just another planet. Oh. Okay. Yeah. Yeah, that makes sense. That makes sense. Yeah. Things are about to get weird. Okay. All right, dig in, dig in, dig in. Kris, dig in. Okay, I’m going to go into this first. Oh lava cake. ‘Cause it’s melting. Yes it is. It’s falling. And I just wanna see what happens when I just destroy it. Oh, and it’s molten. The ice cream. Oh my gosh. That’s sexual. That is a sexual chocolate, indeed. Sorry. No, no, no. This is, listen. This is extremely sexual. It is though, isn’t it? You ever eat the frozen corn dog? Still frozen. You know what? Can’t say I have. Have you? Are you just? Of course not. I am, just. No. You ever like start to say somethin’ and you like, my brain will catch up. I’ve eaten refrigerated hot dogs. That’s a good time. I’ve never had the combination of- This is great Mint chip ice cream and chocolate lava. Yeah. Isn’t it good? It’s almost like you’re getting the mouthwash and the dessert in one, which is really cool. And I love that you. You made it sound so awful. It’s not awful. If you love it, then I’m gonna have a good time. Like you could make out with somebody after eating this. Taylor. Coming right your way, buddy. Watch it, mister. Kris, what the hell does success look like to you? Oh. No, hold on. I have a pointed way of phrasing this question. Okay. ‘Cause you talked about, you don’t like when people like, five year plan. And you don’t really have a plan. 50 years from now. Yeah. You know? You’re an old, old person. Yes. You’re looking back on your life, what are the major milestones that you hit that made you happy? Like what are the things you reflect on your death bed? So far? Yeah. I guess like the generic thing, which isn’t generic, but it would be like making like Forbes 30 under 30 list and stuff. Which was, I’m just like. What? They try and sell you sweatshirts afterwards. Is it? Do you get those emails? Yeah. You get a lot of emails. They’re like, do you wanna buy it. Like congrats. Like just let me. Buy a $530 sweatshirt. Yeah. Like no. No. No. But, yeah. I guess that would be one, and like, this is going to sound so cheesy, but I just want to, like achieve that level of like blissfulness that I haven’t reached yet. So when I get to that, I’ll feel like that’s gonna be like, my achievement. And maybe that’s, the cabin in the woods. On the lake. With my 50 dogs. My question is, and asking for a friend, how do you like manufacture those? How do you make sure that you actually end up with those experiences that you look back on as your life flashes before your eyes? I’ve tried to say yes to a lot of things that I would usually say no to. Yeah. Which usually involve other people. I’m a very, believe it or not, introverted person. Yup. And like, I have these spurts, with ADHD, just energy spurts really. Ah, yeah! But like, probably 30 minutes from now, I’m gonna want to crawl in a cave, and like be there for like a day and just not talk to anybody. Yeah. You’re ready to get to the lightening round? Yeah. Let’s do it. Okay. Other than me, who’s the one person dead or alive that you want to share your actual last meal with? Oh, that’s easy. Robin Williams. Oh, man. Yes, he is the epitome of everything I want to be. Hello. Hello. I love it, I love it. Dream eulogizer of your funeral? Not counting Robin Williams. We put that for everybody. Oh, okay, okay. Oh, Jim Carey. Smart. Is that weird? No. It’d be a hell of a eulogy. I’m just going with all. Right? I think so. It’s be so weird. It’d be so me. There’s like Salvador Dali. Yeah, right? How do you want to be remembered after you die? Like, I just want to be like the biggest Dateline case. Ever. Like, where did she go? What happened? Honestly. But if I was to give you like the cheesy answer, it’d be like making people happy, which it is. Like, I love that I’m an escape, or an escape for people. I was going to say scapegoat. But that’s not what I want. Or say escape artist? It’s like the coolest thing I’ve achieved at this point. Do you have any regrets in life? Yeah. I’ll give you the cheesy answer. I am where I am because I’ve made all those mistakes. No! That sucks. It does suck. I hate when people say that. Okay. I know, I know, I know. If you don’t have a regret, every single moment of the day, then it’s like, I don’t understand where you’re coming from. It’s true. I just, I regret like 80% of my life. Finally, are ya happy? I just said I wasn’t. I know. It was on the show cards that I threw away, Kris. I make other people happy. The hell you want me to do? No. No, I, you know what, I am happy. I have absolute very deep dips, and I go up and down, but when I’m at these peaks, I try to remember what got me to these peaks. And I try to hold on to that and keep it going and that, it’s okay to have those dips. You’re going to have those dips. Kris, if you have any last words, stare right into that camera right there, and tell ’em. Oh, before I die. Oh yeah, yeah, yeah. Last words. Wow. I knew this question was coming. Didn’t think about it. All right. Always get the side of fries and always order dessert. That’s, those are my last words. And tip your bartenders, folks. This has been Kris Collins. Woo! Yeah. No, for real. Thank you so much for coming on. Like thank you for the honesty and being willing to talk about the crazy stuff. I love it, I love it. No, this was fan-the best interview ever. And thank y’all so much for stopping by. I’m in the kitchen. You know the deal. If you wanna subscribe, do it. If you don’t. Do it. Kris, tell the folks where they can find ya. You can find me @Kallmekris. That’s it. Like everywhere. Yeah. Like all the stuff. Yeah. We’re, yeah. Appreciate it. YouTube. Do or don’t. I watched the one where you ate a pumpkin spice with your sister. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Not a big fan of pumpkin. No. That’s not great. No. Yeah. But hey, I’m still here. This is good though. Oh yeah. I’m full. I’m not going to lie. I ate a lot of perogies. Did you? I started dipping e’m it in ranch, too. Oh, did you? I don’t know if you saw that. I didn’t. Why, I, when I’m uncomfortable, I eat. When I’m comfortable, I eat. All right. Amazing. So do we just jump out of this like Nascar drivers? Yeah. Your favorite food podcast has it’s own tee. Oh my God, we do? We sure do. Get your own A Hot Dog is a Sandwich logo tee at mythical.com.